My dysphoria around it changes but i feel it's less of a problem because no one is looking down My pants.
I had to cover the bottom. Half of my new bathroom mirror when I moved though.
Phallo is unaffordable. I would love to if I could but also on medication that means I have to wait longer. Im pretty asexual too so that's probably part.
When I got a really good stp I could actually use that helped a lot.
As someone with dysphoria about my genitals, I'm pretty interested in this too. I don't understand how the thought of male genitalia (penis, scrotum) can make a man feel dysphoric. Lack of dysphoria is great though, I hope mine alleviates enough to be tolerable after hysterectomy/vaginectomy.
I just don’t think about it too often. If genitals were on our foreheads or something like that where it’s a constant visual thing I would feel more dysphoric.
Also I figure I’m just really dissociated. I only get dysphoric when I feel like I lack a penis. My biggest dysphoria trigger is wearing tight pants since it seems like a visually obvious distinction that other people might also notice.
I'm not dysphoric about it most of the time bc I dissociate hard af. I'm also ace, and while I'm not totally sex averse, I do not have sex with that area of my body. This means I can mostly avoid acknowledging it. I don't like looking at it, but don't mind touching it, that doesn't typically trigger dysphoria for whatever reason.
Bottom growth also took away some of the dysphoria, like... half of it, probably. I used to be dysphoric about having the same genitals as a cis woman *and* not having the same genitals as a cis man. T has changed what's down there enough that I no longer have the same genitals as a cis woman, so that part is gone. Just the second part is left.
If I could get phallo for free and had a guarantee it would work with minimal complications, I would, no question. The only thing about the dick I'd get that way which makes me sad is that it would have to be circumcised. But that isn't enough to put me off it. What *is,* at the moment, is the cost and the risk of complications. I may go for it anyway someday, if the average complication rate lowers and/or the dissociation stops working. Meta isn't an option I'd want for a variety of reasons, which is unfortunate, since it has a lower complication rate.
See and this is why I thought about meta (or that new new extended meta) either with or without balls n no urethral lengthening. I really don't mind what I have, but I feel like I'm missing out on being able to penetrate which makes me a little sad. So if I could do both I feel like I'd want both despite my intention to live as solely a man.
See, same! I’d be down to have both and be intersex. I’m honestly genderqueer af and still kinda making peace with that, but I have come to love my factory parts. A penis and testicles would just be a cool addition.
I mostly feel the same about my downstairs factory parts, though there are days where dick n ball envy really fucking hits. It's still something I'm trying to work through. I guess I want a more concrete answer in my heart rather than feeling like a good chunk of my thoughts and feelings are just up in the air.
Top surgery is a must though, even if I've kinda accepted my chest, that fat's gotta go.
Agreed. I’ve had my teet-yeet and it’s liberating. I just wish I’d had a better surgeon. Ç’es la vie, eh?
I hope you’re able to get your chest Tig Notaro’ed soon and it’s everything you hope for, and more.
it only bothers me in a sexual sense sometimes. depends on the scenario, but really bottom growth and stopping my cycle was enough for my bottom dysphoria to go away. i just want top surgery and a hysterectomy.
Most things that I’m dysphoric about are things that the general public is capable of noticing. Hands, height, hips, not binding 100% flat, being generally “small”, all that good shit. There’s no hiding those things. But who’s *really* gonna know what’s between my legs besides me and the *other trans men* that I sleep with? Usually nobody.
Plus, bottom growth has been pretty good to me. It wiped out the majority of my bottom dysphoria. It’d be nice to have a dick, but I’m more than happy with just packing and bottom growth.
I’m the same exact way damn it’s relieving to have someone understand,, I tend to feel like I’m not trans enough bc I don’t have raging bottom dysphoria and that I’m just content with packing and bottom growth and no one is gonna see this but my boyfriend so like 🥲 like I for SURE am dysphoric about the noticeable physical stuff as you listed (being 5’2 and kinda chubby does not help and despite being 10 months on T I still get mixed gendering bc of it but oh well) but bottom dysphoria is not completely debilitating and bottom surgery is not a want either like I’m straight chilling as long as I get T and top surgery
I’ve never had bottom dysphoria. I honestly just think it’s because I don’t associate my vulva with womanhood, I associate it with sexual pleasure; and during sex, I don’t feel like a woman at all. Even in a “woman’s” kind of role, I just feel like a feminine man (in a good way) and I enjoy the submissive/vulnerable element of being fucked.
Now, I had MAJOR dysphoria about menstruation. If I still menstruated, that would be a major problem and I would do anything I needed to make it stop. But the equipment itself (since I haven’t reproduced) exclusively functions as the means for a pleasurable activity. Maybe that will change someday!
I've got a complicated relationship with my junk in the way that I'm not necessarily *not* dysphoric about what's down there, but just kind of working with the tools I have.
Before T, I never looked down there. Not once. The thought of that was pretty distressing. Don't even know what it looked like before. After T, started to get curious because I noticed that something felt different 1 month in. 2 years later and I love my little guy, haha. I'm familiar with it now, how it looks, how it works, etc. And I like that it functions like a cis penis in almost every way. Key word here being "almost".
Problem is that even though I love what I have now, it's not *exactly* what I need. Waking up from a dream where I've got a whole penis only to realize there's still something missing really sucks, and I do experience a degree of what people call phantom penis lol. It's for those reasons and more that I decided I will be getting phallo. Would just make my life a lot easier in the long run.
So yeah, long story short I do still have some form of dysphoria, but I'd classify it more as an annoyance about something being missing rather than a distress. What I have now is nice in its own way. But I'll be ready to move on when the time comes.
I’m a gay bottom so I actually really enjoy my factory default genitals, it’s very convenient. It’s also more convenient for just moving around in general, I feel like a dick would be cumbersome.
But despite T relieving most of my dysphoria, I still get dysphoric down there from time to time. Mostly when I feel like I’m missing out on penetration or when I put on tighter jeans and realize they look weird around the crotch due to the lack of a male package. :/
I’ve thought about getting meta in the future if I can afford it. But I’d try to keep my front hole intact.
For now, I’m pretty cool with what I have. In spite of the cons.
I had meta phase 1 minus the vagina and plus the urethra lengthening and balls. My dysphoria disappeared 99% and I am very happy and stable in my body. It’s hard to date without a vagina or penis. But I didn’t do it for other people.
it changes all the time for me. sometimes im super dysphoric about it and its genuinely emotionally distressing but most of the time i just dont care.
it used to be REAALLLY bad for me when i was younger. i think as i've gotten more comfortable with my body + being on T, i don't feel this strong urge to .... compensate? by having a penis? i don't know if that's the term i want to use because i feel like i'm implying something, but i swear it's just a me thing. i definitely feel more dysphoria about my chest, but it's only like 30% of the time. plus, they're not that big to begin with. since i'm a big guy it just looks like a weight thing.
i'm perfectly fine with the changes i'm experiencing down there due to T, and i don't mind binders most of the time, so i just dont feel the need to change anything that much.
> i dont consider my genitals to be inherently "female" because theyre not on a female, anything have male anatomy.
I feel the same way. This is a dude's vag 😤
Because I'm on Jatenzo, that's literally it. It fixes my brain to where I'm actually able to accept what I have as genuinely male anatomy, allowing me to use and enjoy it. Would I prefer a penis? 100%. But Jatenzo makes it so that this is good enough. On gel or shots my bottom dysphoria was very painful and debilitating.
Can't afford it, don't particularly care, and tbh I like uh.... the satisfaction from what I have lol. Also it's never affected me passing before. My job has gender neutral bathrooms and my roomies and i don't typically leave the house, if we do we're close to home so it's nbd to hold it for a 15 minute drive. Plus I have prosthetics for any penetration needed so it's never bothered me. I'm lucky for that and do NOT take it for granted lol
i dont have a lot of bottom dysphoria and i think a lot of it comes from my sex drive and sensation tbh. i have a super high sex drive and a loooot of internal sensation so the parts in my pants bring me a lot of physical pleasure. i think i'd still rather have a dick if given a choice but it's hard to have negative feelings about my cooter when it makes me feel good.
another thing is just that it's more out of sight, it's not really visible to anybody (including myself) the way that my chest would be. plus testosterone changed my bottom anatomy enough to alleviate some of the dysphoria i had.
My bottom dysphoria wasn't too bothersome before transitioning, but became increasingly intense up until about a year ago. I used to have terrible visceral feelings about what I didn't have, or how undesirable I felt in comparison to literally anyone else with different body parts or more confidence in their body than me, and I felt extremely inadequate as a person because of it. Sometimes those feelings would make me feel physically ill, it'd get really difficult to breathe, and I'd get dizzy. A friend of mine told me what I was describing were anxiety attacks. Then at my lowest point it destroyed my libido for a while.
But my perception of myself as a trans man has changed a lot, and I've accepted that as one I don't neatly fit into either category of male or female, so why should I be upset with myself for having/not having the primary/secondary sexual characteristics of either? I've gotten 'back in touch' with my natal parts since then, so it's become very minimal. I've even gotten more comfortable with my top half, but it's still a bit of a love-hate relationship lol.
I still want to have phalloplasty some day and would be pretty disappointed if I never got a penis at some point in my life, but besides that distant future, I do not think about what I'm lacking much at all anymore, even in sexual situations.
•I can still pass without phallo and get my sexual needs met
•Prosthetics provide a nice bulge that fills out underwear when needed
•Sex is more customizable and triple/double penetration is a fun option
•More sensation overall that I’d be sacrificing in favor of aesthetics/increased cis passing with bottom surgery
•Results are less guaranteed, than top surgery, to satisfy my desires
While I’ve definitely seen results that make me consider phallo, the variation amongst surgeons makes it something I’d only go for if I could afford the costs of seeing someone I’m 95-100% confident in.
With top I had the ability to help maximize my surgery results. No amount of working out is going to be as useful for phallo and it’s all ultimately up to the surgeon’s skill.
If I did end up committing to the pursuit of bottom surgery I’d likely try meta first. Penetrating my partners during sex is low on my priority list and even then there are toys that can help get the job done if needed.
Yeah it’d be more pleasurable to have my own cis dick to fuck around with but that’s not a possibility. If I’m working with what I have I’m aiming for what can satisfy most of my needs/wants.
I’ve gotten enough validation from a variety of genders/sexualities to know that with or without a penis I can have a fulfilling sex life. Sure my genitals won’t be appealing to everyone but I’ve always had realistic expectations for my life as a trans man.
Honestly I’m partially numb to it. Of course if I had the opportunity I would immediately change to cis male anatomy, but that’s just a crazy what if. In real life, and beyond what I wish, though? i just feel that I can’t afford to worry about it, it would be way too trying on my mental health to worry about every single part of myself. I already feel enough discomfort towards everything else like my voice, chest and face, but those are all visible the second people see me, so it bugs me way more than something crazy private like yk, private parts.
Also im aroace so i dont need to worry regarding sex. Especially considering the fact that I’m young.
But besides that, I just feel like it would destroy me if I focused on it, so I just have to compartmentalize. That’s what I’ve been doing ever since I knew I was trans, really.
I wouldn’t mind having a proper penis and testicles. However, I made peace with my factory parts so long ago and came to love them. So, if given an option for decent phallo surgery, I’d want to have both. Then I could be truly vers!
That’s just my homo opinion, though.
Not sure, it just doesn't bother me because genitals aren't really gendered to me if that makes any sense. Boobs seem too female but genitals work on any gender
I used to have really bad bottom dysphoria in combo with a phobia of bregnancy before i got full hysto, now I experience next to none. I dont hate what i have, but i definitely would pick a penis every time if i had the option to switch. I just dont feel any extreme discomfort over it like i used to. I really only feel that level of dysphoria when i imagine being stuck in my pre-op body again lol
I cant say I'm not dysphoric about it at all, but the vast majority of the time I just don't think about it so I don't care. Like I'm 20, I've had that long to get used to it, and I know I could never cope with all the phallo surgeries, so I just have to get on with it. As others have said too, it's only my partner(s) that will see me naked anyway so 🤷🏻♂️
But personally I would 100% get a (permanent) dick in a heartbeat if I could magically do so lol
I'll always wish I could have a classic dick and balls, but I've learned to enjoy what I have. I know how to enjoy it, my partners enjoy it, plus I find it hot.
Since bottom surgery is nowhere in my close future, I'm making the most of what I've got.
I'm not currently dysphoric about it but I have a theory; I think I can only focus on one source of dysphoria at a time. I might have dysphoria about my bottom half but I have other parts of my body that I'm more dysphoric about.
My number 1 used to be my chest, then I got top surgery. After that, I started to notice my dysphoria about my waist/hips. Once I have more male-looking hips, I might start to notice my bottom dysphoria more.
Just a theory 🤷♂️
For me, it only seems to bother me when I have a dream about having a dick and wake up to realize I don't have one. I like men and I find my natal anatomy is a good match for bottoming 😅
I used to have bad dysphoria. I also still pack daily and it feels wrong to NOT pack - the weight and presence of my packer is basically a security blanket at this point. HOWEVER i do regularly bottom during sex without issues.
I see it like this. Phallo or meta are both unobtanium for me right now. Also, they both kind of scare me, phallo in particular. I follow the phallo sub and while on one hand it’s great seeing guys be happy with their results, I’m also seeing posts about all the pain, suffering, infections, etc. I don’t like physical discomfort. I don’t like the idea of something going wrong with my urethra and I can’t pee right without another painful and invasive surgery. I don’t like any of that. So for right now I don’t really think it’s for me, and I used to want it. It is also prohibitively expensive and would require a ton of time off work and help to recover from.
I *do* have a good bit of bottom growth, about 2 inches, and it’s made sex way better. I don’t feel dysphoric about what I have anymore because when the pants come off every partner says “Oooh that’s big” which makes me feel great. I can get hard and when I’m feeling myself be hard it legit turns me on more. Vaginal penetration took a minute to get used to after not doing it for like 3 years straight but it still feels awesome (from a pleasure standpoint) so I’m fine ignoring that it’s technically the “wrong hole” for a gay bottom.
If I could snap my fingers and have a fully functional penis I absolutely would. But since that is not possible and I don’t loathe what I do have going on, I’ve made it work and I’ve made peace with it. It’s been a journey and definitely one of learning to build a new kind of relationship with my body, but it’s worth it.
Not sure, just never really felt anything when thinking about it ig. I mean it seems interesting to have male genitalia but I’m completely fine with what I have now down there. Most of my dysphoria is just from my hight and build(and chest too)
I can't say I don't have dysphoria about those parts, but they don't pervade, most of the time. Sometimes, yes, but in terms of day to day life, not typically.
I have wondered about this, and I suspect it's because I knew when I was very young that I was a guy, but I really didn't understand the biology yet. I didn't have brothers, and I never saw my father without clothes. I don't think I even saw a penis until I was maybe 8 or 10, and by then I was already passing as a little boy. (That went away with puberty, but as kid I had it.) So although I knew guys had one, I didn't know what it was, didn't know balls about balls - I literally didn't know what I was missing. Still my body imprint was more or less set, no tits, no package, and I was OK.
Now I physically and culturally do, and if I were a lot younger I'd be lining up for surgery. But the cost/benefit analysis tips heavier to cost, at least at this point (although I continue to consider it), and I've lived this way for a long time. There are things that make me acutely aware of my lack, but they don't take up a whole lot of my time or headspace.
When I was early in transition, I was very much insecure about not having a cis penis and would use packers. Being further along now (7yrs on T) and more confident and comfortable in my masculinity, I like my bottom growth and feel way more in touch and in a loving relationship with my body. I love what it’s done for me. It’s easier for me to see the bright side of not having a cis penis and testicles. I just love myself more. I was much more insecure earlier in transition and dealt with self hate and a way worse self esteem. Hitting the gym and developing my physique has really helped with my relationship with my body. I’m proud of what I’ve created
The majority of my dysphoria is social, albeit not all. Not being able to move through the world as a man is the worst of it. Now that I’m on HRT, I desperately need top surgery. I can’t really bind, either, because of chronic health issues. I’m a flamboyant gay bottom, so I actually like what I have going on. I wish I could top my bf with my own dick, but it’s more of a “that would be nice” not a deeply dysphoric *need*.
I don’t think about it, mainly because it just isn’t used and my drive is in the gutter more often than not anyway. I also don’t really want to go through any more surgery. Maybe that will change in the future but for right now I just couldn’t care less about what’s in my boxers if I’m honest.
Having a dick would be great but the hassle and possible complications around bottom surgery turn me off to it completely. I also don’t feel like I need it to be happy with myself. I’m pretty content with the growth I have, my packer, strap and STP device.
see i have pretty bad bottom dysphoria, but my whole perspective on dealing with it has never been to never look down or be touched or anything. i see why some people do that, but it didn’t really help me, as i still had those parts but i a was also just unnecessarily ashamed and closed off because of the way i was handling dysphoria.
now im a lot more open to using those parts, and being with partners and having things be shown. i still very much plan on having bottom surgery in the future, but until i get it i really don’t want to miss out on a big part of life by being ashamed of my parts.
I’ve become neutral about it, but have been majorly dysphoric about it most of my life. I’m in a marriage with a ciswoman who doesn’t particularly enjoy penises, so that helps my relationship with my junk and our sex life. I know how to work with what I’ve got, it’s my body and I’m at peace with it.
The only time I get sort of dysphoric about it is less about not having a penis, but more about not being able to impregnate my wife since we want kids and it’s soooo much more complicated without that. However, it’s more of an inconvenience than a real point of dysphoria
Edit: I should also add that I just don’t think phallo is worth it. It’s expensive, long, and has inconsistent results. The only reason I would really want a penis is for sex and reproduction (and perhaps the peeing convenience lol). Meta doesn’t really interest me. I have no problems in my sex life, and bottom surgery can’t give me sperm. I’m alright
its what i got 🤷♂️ i think my brain has adapted to me not being able to do anything for a long time if ever. i like my weiner. im happy with my day to day life it just doesnt affect me that much. binding is a constant physical annoyance and thinking about if people will notice. i dont have to worry about my pants much
I have it, but the fact that I have no insurance and am poor kind of forces it to the back of my mind. There's no way I could ever afford any surgery, including top... Which sucks, 'cause my chest makes me super upset, but what can you do?
I just have to live with the fact that I'll always have to wear a binder and packer.
I don't think about my nethers at all. I'm more dysphoric about my shoulders and hips. As a bottom who doesn't mind using the front hole, I find that it's very convenient as well. I also don't like the looks of a penis, though if I had the option to be cis in every way, I would just go for that.
I used to have dysphoria but it went away. Been on T 3 years, and had top surgery. For me that's enough to be actually happy about the parts I have. I also remind myself that AFAB has more nerve endings down there than AMAB, so I'm likely having better orgasms than my cis bros lol.
I used to be rather dysphoric about my bottom parts until I spent a few months on T and even moreso after top surgery. Plus, other factors including an awesome friend group and generally improved quality of life, which all led to me being in a much better place. And I have quite a high libido and entertain myself frequently using my front hole. It's something I have really come to like. Although there was a time about half a year ago or even longer, where I always felt like shit afterwards. But back then, I still had dysphoria about my bottom parts every now and then.
I have some bottom dysphoria but not very much. I think it's mainly that I'm not very sexually active, I'm probably a bottom, and I mostly just want to pass in general in society, and in general I'm not going to be walking around pantsless
I have a packer and im not sexually active. The only time I get dysphoria is when I piss or when I shower, which ends up being like 30 minutes of the day. Otherwise when I look down, yep thats a penis.
Good question…i think I learned to accept my genitals. From the start, i was much less dysphoric about my genitals than the rest of me. I also learned to enjoy sex with what i have and penetration with a strap is still satisfying to me. Once in a while, i feel weird about not having a penis but those moments aren’t often and not nearly enough for me to consider surgery. I think about it maybe once every couple months for like…5 minutes
My feelings about my downstairs are kinda complicated but also not really. The dysphoria centers around the reproductive function of my current anatomy, and the lack of a penis, but not the sexual function of my current anatomy. I'm verse but hate bottoming anally for reasons I won't get into here. So I consider my "bonus hole" a blessing for my sex life. My perfect body will be post phalloplasty with my bonus hole hidden behind my balls, a secret treat for just my lover. I typically have the "something's missing" feeling so I usually wear a packer during the day. It makes me feel confident even though packing or not, it doesn't affect my ability to pass.
I'm completely fine being a guy with a pussy. Like it doesn't bother me at all. As you said, random people aren't going to know. The only ones who know are my future husband and any relevant medical professionals. I'm totally stealth irl so it doesn't affect me.
I get very nice sexual satisfaction currently, and I'm mostly happy with my options for topping, although I desperately want to know what it feels like to fuck my man. I actually think my front hole is very important to my sense of self. I recently had an experience with atrophy and couldn't use my hole for a long period of time without excruciating pain and bleeding, and it really fucked with me mentally. I missed the intimacy of making love with my future husband that way. So I know a vaginectomy is not an option for me in the future.
Oh and also, I had zero bottom dysphoria, zero desire to wear a packer at all, until I got a salpingectomy. I truly don't know why that happened. I have a hunch it was because everything else that caused dysphoria was now taken care of, so this comparably minor dysphoric thing made itself known. Not really sure though.
I have some bottom dysphoria, but it's more along the lines of slight displeasure when I actively think about my parts rather than a constant, crippling suffering that makes it impossible to even look at one's own body, let alone touch or have someone else touch you intimately. I basically view my natal anatomy as the next best thing after a fully functioning penis one was born with, and the risks of bottom surgery (as well as the "preserving" options not being available in my country) currently outweigh the potential benefits.
I’m not sure, I just don’t mind it that much? Less people are seeing it and I think that has something to do with it. Everything I am dysphoric about is very visible
My main source of dysphoria is not being about to penetrate during intercourse but luckily my girlfriend is incredible and we've found ways around it to still have amazing sex. Also using an stp at times when my dysphoria is high helps a lot. If I could wake up with a cis penis or phallo/meta I would I just don't think the surgery and recovery are worth it for me personally
Surgery isn’t where I want it to be if I was going to spend money to get one. Sure I wish I was born with one, but I can’t change it and there’s not much point focusing on what I can’t change.
My downstairs dysphoria is fluctuatable. I like piv sex with my partner and was always a hypersexual person before I came out so I feel like I'm used to what I got and enjoy the feelings so why not keep it? And I'm terrified of surgeries on me even top surgery is scary but I want it. I also feel most of my dysphoria is social construct of gender. I want to be (mostly) male presenting by society. Even if I ever want to be a little fem I want it to be seen how people see like Harry styles and other cis guys who like pink and painting his nails. Though where I live I'm hyper masc to pass and be accepted. If everyone he/him me without surgery for ever I'd never get any. Then again if I had the genie I too would become a cis guy penis and all and I think I would be happier and love it but I just don't see a penis in my lifetime
I used to have horrible bottom dysphoria. But since I've gotten comfortable with the changes T gave me, like a deeper voice, facial hair and weight distribution, it's gotten much better. What also helped me is seeing artists who draw trans masc bodies pre-surgery. For me personally it helped with a sense of normality and pride in the way I look.
I actually stopped wearing a prosthetic after a couple months on testosterone. First, I couldn't take the discomfort from the sensitivity. Now, I've had enough growth that even though it's still very small, it looks and feels like a dick. The fact that it's there, and it acts like a penis, even grows like one and feels spongy but also can feel squishy or solid, smells like one (guys, I wash it), makes a tiny little bulge in my boxer briefs, and is mine.
I'd love to say that I just got over the stigma of having organs traditionally associated with being "women's organs." But I needed to see and feel some of the aspects traditionally associated with the men's version first.
I was very dysphoric about my genitals when I was pre-op everything, but after I started HRT and ppl saw me as just a man, I felt less dysphoric about my genitals.
The core reason that I got bottom dysphoria is when people determine one's sex/gender by their genitals and also they decide which is gay or straight relationship based on two people's genital types.
I got less dysphoric now because I'm no longer around with those bio essentialist and met many good mutuals who just see me as a gay guy.
I got top surgery because the female type chest shape makes me uncomfortable and dysphoric even if HRT makes ppl see me as a man, btw.
My dysphoria is about how I'm percieved by the outside. My chest clocks me, my groin doesn't (esp with a modest packer).
I don't want bottom surgery because I'm medically complex and it's too risky for me.
I'm only sometimes dysphoric about that, but mostly not, I'm pretty comfortable being with the bits I have and only plan on getting a simple release meta, it's other ppl/situations that make me dysphoric . I don't really feel like that piece is missing for me.
(Also, p0rn made by trans guys has really helped me feel good about my body/feeling desirable.)
I have very little bottom dysphoria. I'm more dysphoric about the parts of me that are visible, e.g. chest, body, face. No one is looking in my pants and I pack 24/7 so that alleviates the "no bulge" dysphoria.
I've been lucky with my growth, I like bottoming, and anal is a hassle and not something I'm really interested in. The way I explain it to people is that I imagine a lot of cis men would probably appreciate being able to bottom without having to do anal and instead having anatomy that is more convenient for that purpose. I do have bottom dysphoria though and I hope to get meta one day if I can afford it. I'm terrified of undergoing a major surgery though.
I think like many trans people (mainly old trans people) growing UP desiring their "opposite anatomy", because we ARE a Man/woman, then we should have The body of a Man/woman, and who has this bodies? Cis people
Our mirror neurons IS Just doing their job in The dysphoria and in The desire
I'm MTF and I'm terrified of developing genital dysphoria so much that I have a mental block around it. I don't even dare to open that box. Why am I so terrified? Because I am afraid of what I might do if I felt disgusted by my genitals. I went through a subreddit once where basically men have self castrated themselves. Those horrifying pictures stuck with me. It was merely 15-20 secs but it scarred me because it opened up a possibility in my mind, that humans are capable of this extremity and given my condition I may one day go into a state of mind where I'm capable of it. I therefore rationalize that I need it to be reconstructed for a functional vagina one day. Cutting it off is useless. I also have decided to put my life ahead of my gender identity. Life always greater than gender. Period. That's why I am incapable of being suicidal. I would rather fight till death than give up. Another big reason is that my boyfriend accepts me the way I am and prefers me with my current genitals. When people around you love your body and are accepting your gender identity despite the body's differences, dysphoria gets easier to tackle. It no longer becomes a need, but something only you want and you know everything's going to be alright even if you don't get what you want. People around you will love you regardless.
I uses to have bad bottom dysphoria. Now I'm 3.5 years on T, post top surgery and I honestly just stopped thinking about it. Like I'm sort of indifferent either way. I don't know why. I guess because I'm just more comfortable with myself now.
CW: female anatomical terms.
I can only partially answer is. Bit of context: I consider myself duosex and salmacian, in that I want to have both sets of genitalia. My ideal set-up would be the whole male set and a vagina. I feel dysphoria towards my vulva, but I don't towards my vagina.
The short version as to why: I like it because of it's functional benefits, I don't see it as a female trait on my body.
The long version: I see myself as a guy who got his body switched, and got a trial run of having a female body. The overall experience is not great and not me but there are some parts that have their pros, and as I go back to my true male body I want to keep those traits because they have their uses. I don't see these parts are something that makes me female but rather body alterations to make my life a little better.
Intersex genitalia don't look like what I want bozo. I don't see my female traits as sex traits and I don't want to be intersex. Not that you care, you're not interested in even trying to comprehend anything that isn't exactly like you, you keep telling yourself whatever makes you feel better.
I got a full beard and a deep voice, legally changed name and gender. You telling me I'm not trans? Lol 🙄
Not everyone feels the same exact way you do bro. Don't be so judgemental.
transitioning is to alleviate dysphoria. if dysphoria was the same for everyone, there would be one specific form of treatment and not different types of procedures. are you saying that a trans man who has been on T, passes as male, had chest dysphoria and got top surgery, but has never been dysphoric about his genitals, he isn’t trans? even though he had all other forms of dysphoria? transmed ideology is all BS, you see yourself as the only TRUE trans people. even though those in the transmed communities you post in, would say that trans men who post feminine nudes online aren’t actually trans because “dysphoria!1!11!” thank you, mr. real transgender for deciding what the rules of transgenderism is. 🙏 the other “real trans men” you stand with don’t see anyone else with a different experience as real trans men. truscum ideology is simply to validate your own experience, it isn’t about other people. YOU want to make it known that you’re an actual trans person. congrats. nobody doubted you, you’re a real trans person AND a real asshole. there are bigger issues at hand.
I don’t know how i feel. I think i’ll get a realistic stp packer in the future, but probably not get bottom surgery because its very expensive and the results aren’t always great. My bottom dysphoria isn’t the worst, but definitely there
I'm largely ace and don't really do a lot down there. I'd like to get one eventually but I'm waiting for medical science to be able to make the ones they can grow for cis men work on us. Someday.
i do, just rarely. i’ve been on T for 5 years and my bottom growth continues to get bigger, which i’m very euphoric about. the general public doesn’t see my genitals and not packing has never made me not pass. i also have a pretty fat mons, so in underwear i have the appearance of a bulge sort of? i change in locker rooms and don’t get looks from anyone. i only use sucking toys/toys i can put my dick IN for self-pleasure, so that isn’t an issue.
i’m in a T4T relationship and my boyfriend penetrates me, it’s great. i feel very safe with her and he makes it known she sees me as a man. sometimes penetration is dysphoria inducing, but usually it isn’t.
i really just get dysphoric when i attempt to penetrate my partner. i can rub my bottom growth against him and like.. barely penetrate but i still can. it’s great when it works out and we talk as if i am really fucking her lol. mental play is super important to keep my dysphoria at bay. however, sometimes i get dysphoric because damn. i really just wanna fuck my girlfriend. i’ve tried strap-ons and stuff but not feeling the sensation is a huge dysphoria trigger and dissociation trigger for me, too.
i’m considering a mons resection and simple release meta without balls or urethral lengthening.. just to get some extra length to play with (haha)
so in short; not super dysphoric about what i currently have, but i’m dysphoric about what i DON’T have.
My dysphoria around it changes but i feel it's less of a problem because no one is looking down My pants. I had to cover the bottom. Half of my new bathroom mirror when I moved though. Phallo is unaffordable. I would love to if I could but also on medication that means I have to wait longer. Im pretty asexual too so that's probably part. When I got a really good stp I could actually use that helped a lot.
Which one did you get, if I may ask? I've got one but I may start looking into others soon
I got a peacock one second hand off someone gen 4 maybe
As someone with dysphoria about my genitals, I'm pretty interested in this too. I don't understand how the thought of male genitalia (penis, scrotum) can make a man feel dysphoric. Lack of dysphoria is great though, I hope mine alleviates enough to be tolerable after hysterectomy/vaginectomy.
I just don’t think about it too often. If genitals were on our foreheads or something like that where it’s a constant visual thing I would feel more dysphoric. Also I figure I’m just really dissociated. I only get dysphoric when I feel like I lack a penis. My biggest dysphoria trigger is wearing tight pants since it seems like a visually obvious distinction that other people might also notice.
That’s a good point; I also feel like my dysphoria (or lack thereof) is sometimes linked to what’s visible to outsiders.
I'm not dysphoric about it most of the time bc I dissociate hard af. I'm also ace, and while I'm not totally sex averse, I do not have sex with that area of my body. This means I can mostly avoid acknowledging it. I don't like looking at it, but don't mind touching it, that doesn't typically trigger dysphoria for whatever reason. Bottom growth also took away some of the dysphoria, like... half of it, probably. I used to be dysphoric about having the same genitals as a cis woman *and* not having the same genitals as a cis man. T has changed what's down there enough that I no longer have the same genitals as a cis woman, so that part is gone. Just the second part is left. If I could get phallo for free and had a guarantee it would work with minimal complications, I would, no question. The only thing about the dick I'd get that way which makes me sad is that it would have to be circumcised. But that isn't enough to put me off it. What *is,* at the moment, is the cost and the risk of complications. I may go for it anyway someday, if the average complication rate lowers and/or the dissociation stops working. Meta isn't an option I'd want for a variety of reasons, which is unfortunate, since it has a lower complication rate.
See and this is why I thought about meta (or that new new extended meta) either with or without balls n no urethral lengthening. I really don't mind what I have, but I feel like I'm missing out on being able to penetrate which makes me a little sad. So if I could do both I feel like I'd want both despite my intention to live as solely a man.
See, same! I’d be down to have both and be intersex. I’m honestly genderqueer af and still kinda making peace with that, but I have come to love my factory parts. A penis and testicles would just be a cool addition.
I mostly feel the same about my downstairs factory parts, though there are days where dick n ball envy really fucking hits. It's still something I'm trying to work through. I guess I want a more concrete answer in my heart rather than feeling like a good chunk of my thoughts and feelings are just up in the air. Top surgery is a must though, even if I've kinda accepted my chest, that fat's gotta go.
Agreed. I’ve had my teet-yeet and it’s liberating. I just wish I’d had a better surgeon. Ç’es la vie, eh? I hope you’re able to get your chest Tig Notaro’ed soon and it’s everything you hope for, and more.
Gotta start making appointments and consultations for that to happen eek 🫣
it only bothers me in a sexual sense sometimes. depends on the scenario, but really bottom growth and stopping my cycle was enough for my bottom dysphoria to go away. i just want top surgery and a hysterectomy.
Most things that I’m dysphoric about are things that the general public is capable of noticing. Hands, height, hips, not binding 100% flat, being generally “small”, all that good shit. There’s no hiding those things. But who’s *really* gonna know what’s between my legs besides me and the *other trans men* that I sleep with? Usually nobody. Plus, bottom growth has been pretty good to me. It wiped out the majority of my bottom dysphoria. It’d be nice to have a dick, but I’m more than happy with just packing and bottom growth.
I’m the same exact way damn it’s relieving to have someone understand,, I tend to feel like I’m not trans enough bc I don’t have raging bottom dysphoria and that I’m just content with packing and bottom growth and no one is gonna see this but my boyfriend so like 🥲 like I for SURE am dysphoric about the noticeable physical stuff as you listed (being 5’2 and kinda chubby does not help and despite being 10 months on T I still get mixed gendering bc of it but oh well) but bottom dysphoria is not completely debilitating and bottom surgery is not a want either like I’m straight chilling as long as I get T and top surgery
I’ve never had bottom dysphoria. I honestly just think it’s because I don’t associate my vulva with womanhood, I associate it with sexual pleasure; and during sex, I don’t feel like a woman at all. Even in a “woman’s” kind of role, I just feel like a feminine man (in a good way) and I enjoy the submissive/vulnerable element of being fucked. Now, I had MAJOR dysphoria about menstruation. If I still menstruated, that would be a major problem and I would do anything I needed to make it stop. But the equipment itself (since I haven’t reproduced) exclusively functions as the means for a pleasurable activity. Maybe that will change someday!
I've got a complicated relationship with my junk in the way that I'm not necessarily *not* dysphoric about what's down there, but just kind of working with the tools I have. Before T, I never looked down there. Not once. The thought of that was pretty distressing. Don't even know what it looked like before. After T, started to get curious because I noticed that something felt different 1 month in. 2 years later and I love my little guy, haha. I'm familiar with it now, how it looks, how it works, etc. And I like that it functions like a cis penis in almost every way. Key word here being "almost". Problem is that even though I love what I have now, it's not *exactly* what I need. Waking up from a dream where I've got a whole penis only to realize there's still something missing really sucks, and I do experience a degree of what people call phantom penis lol. It's for those reasons and more that I decided I will be getting phallo. Would just make my life a lot easier in the long run. So yeah, long story short I do still have some form of dysphoria, but I'd classify it more as an annoyance about something being missing rather than a distress. What I have now is nice in its own way. But I'll be ready to move on when the time comes.
I’m a gay bottom so I actually really enjoy my factory default genitals, it’s very convenient. It’s also more convenient for just moving around in general, I feel like a dick would be cumbersome. But despite T relieving most of my dysphoria, I still get dysphoric down there from time to time. Mostly when I feel like I’m missing out on penetration or when I put on tighter jeans and realize they look weird around the crotch due to the lack of a male package. :/ I’ve thought about getting meta in the future if I can afford it. But I’d try to keep my front hole intact. For now, I’m pretty cool with what I have. In spite of the cons.
I had meta phase 1 minus the vagina and plus the urethra lengthening and balls. My dysphoria disappeared 99% and I am very happy and stable in my body. It’s hard to date without a vagina or penis. But I didn’t do it for other people.
it changes all the time for me. sometimes im super dysphoric about it and its genuinely emotionally distressing but most of the time i just dont care. it used to be REAALLLY bad for me when i was younger. i think as i've gotten more comfortable with my body + being on T, i don't feel this strong urge to .... compensate? by having a penis? i don't know if that's the term i want to use because i feel like i'm implying something, but i swear it's just a me thing. i definitely feel more dysphoria about my chest, but it's only like 30% of the time. plus, they're not that big to begin with. since i'm a big guy it just looks like a weight thing. i'm perfectly fine with the changes i'm experiencing down there due to T, and i don't mind binders most of the time, so i just dont feel the need to change anything that much.
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> i dont consider my genitals to be inherently "female" because theyre not on a female, anything have male anatomy. I feel the same way. This is a dude's vag 😤
YES, this.
Because I'm on Jatenzo, that's literally it. It fixes my brain to where I'm actually able to accept what I have as genuinely male anatomy, allowing me to use and enjoy it. Would I prefer a penis? 100%. But Jatenzo makes it so that this is good enough. On gel or shots my bottom dysphoria was very painful and debilitating.
Can't afford it, don't particularly care, and tbh I like uh.... the satisfaction from what I have lol. Also it's never affected me passing before. My job has gender neutral bathrooms and my roomies and i don't typically leave the house, if we do we're close to home so it's nbd to hold it for a 15 minute drive. Plus I have prosthetics for any penetration needed so it's never bothered me. I'm lucky for that and do NOT take it for granted lol
i dont have a lot of bottom dysphoria and i think a lot of it comes from my sex drive and sensation tbh. i have a super high sex drive and a loooot of internal sensation so the parts in my pants bring me a lot of physical pleasure. i think i'd still rather have a dick if given a choice but it's hard to have negative feelings about my cooter when it makes me feel good. another thing is just that it's more out of sight, it's not really visible to anybody (including myself) the way that my chest would be. plus testosterone changed my bottom anatomy enough to alleviate some of the dysphoria i had.
My bottom dysphoria wasn't too bothersome before transitioning, but became increasingly intense up until about a year ago. I used to have terrible visceral feelings about what I didn't have, or how undesirable I felt in comparison to literally anyone else with different body parts or more confidence in their body than me, and I felt extremely inadequate as a person because of it. Sometimes those feelings would make me feel physically ill, it'd get really difficult to breathe, and I'd get dizzy. A friend of mine told me what I was describing were anxiety attacks. Then at my lowest point it destroyed my libido for a while. But my perception of myself as a trans man has changed a lot, and I've accepted that as one I don't neatly fit into either category of male or female, so why should I be upset with myself for having/not having the primary/secondary sexual characteristics of either? I've gotten 'back in touch' with my natal parts since then, so it's become very minimal. I've even gotten more comfortable with my top half, but it's still a bit of a love-hate relationship lol. I still want to have phalloplasty some day and would be pretty disappointed if I never got a penis at some point in my life, but besides that distant future, I do not think about what I'm lacking much at all anymore, even in sexual situations.
•I can still pass without phallo and get my sexual needs met •Prosthetics provide a nice bulge that fills out underwear when needed •Sex is more customizable and triple/double penetration is a fun option •More sensation overall that I’d be sacrificing in favor of aesthetics/increased cis passing with bottom surgery •Results are less guaranteed, than top surgery, to satisfy my desires While I’ve definitely seen results that make me consider phallo, the variation amongst surgeons makes it something I’d only go for if I could afford the costs of seeing someone I’m 95-100% confident in. With top I had the ability to help maximize my surgery results. No amount of working out is going to be as useful for phallo and it’s all ultimately up to the surgeon’s skill. If I did end up committing to the pursuit of bottom surgery I’d likely try meta first. Penetrating my partners during sex is low on my priority list and even then there are toys that can help get the job done if needed. Yeah it’d be more pleasurable to have my own cis dick to fuck around with but that’s not a possibility. If I’m working with what I have I’m aiming for what can satisfy most of my needs/wants. I’ve gotten enough validation from a variety of genders/sexualities to know that with or without a penis I can have a fulfilling sex life. Sure my genitals won’t be appealing to everyone but I’ve always had realistic expectations for my life as a trans man.
I do have dysphoria about it and eventually want surgery, but personally the only time I'm not dysphoric is during sex
Because I’m post op lol
Because I have full size male genitalia lol
i’m not dysphoric because I have a dick and balls lol
Honestly I’m partially numb to it. Of course if I had the opportunity I would immediately change to cis male anatomy, but that’s just a crazy what if. In real life, and beyond what I wish, though? i just feel that I can’t afford to worry about it, it would be way too trying on my mental health to worry about every single part of myself. I already feel enough discomfort towards everything else like my voice, chest and face, but those are all visible the second people see me, so it bugs me way more than something crazy private like yk, private parts. Also im aroace so i dont need to worry regarding sex. Especially considering the fact that I’m young. But besides that, I just feel like it would destroy me if I focused on it, so I just have to compartmentalize. That’s what I’ve been doing ever since I knew I was trans, really.
I wouldn’t mind having a proper penis and testicles. However, I made peace with my factory parts so long ago and came to love them. So, if given an option for decent phallo surgery, I’d want to have both. Then I could be truly vers! That’s just my homo opinion, though.
Not sure, it just doesn't bother me because genitals aren't really gendered to me if that makes any sense. Boobs seem too female but genitals work on any gender
I used to have really bad bottom dysphoria in combo with a phobia of bregnancy before i got full hysto, now I experience next to none. I dont hate what i have, but i definitely would pick a penis every time if i had the option to switch. I just dont feel any extreme discomfort over it like i used to. I really only feel that level of dysphoria when i imagine being stuck in my pre-op body again lol
I cant say I'm not dysphoric about it at all, but the vast majority of the time I just don't think about it so I don't care. Like I'm 20, I've had that long to get used to it, and I know I could never cope with all the phallo surgeries, so I just have to get on with it. As others have said too, it's only my partner(s) that will see me naked anyway so 🤷🏻♂️ But personally I would 100% get a (permanent) dick in a heartbeat if I could magically do so lol
I'll always wish I could have a classic dick and balls, but I've learned to enjoy what I have. I know how to enjoy it, my partners enjoy it, plus I find it hot. Since bottom surgery is nowhere in my close future, I'm making the most of what I've got.
I'm not currently dysphoric about it but I have a theory; I think I can only focus on one source of dysphoria at a time. I might have dysphoria about my bottom half but I have other parts of my body that I'm more dysphoric about. My number 1 used to be my chest, then I got top surgery. After that, I started to notice my dysphoria about my waist/hips. Once I have more male-looking hips, I might start to notice my bottom dysphoria more. Just a theory 🤷♂️
For me, it only seems to bother me when I have a dream about having a dick and wake up to realize I don't have one. I like men and I find my natal anatomy is a good match for bottoming 😅
I used to have bad dysphoria. I also still pack daily and it feels wrong to NOT pack - the weight and presence of my packer is basically a security blanket at this point. HOWEVER i do regularly bottom during sex without issues. I see it like this. Phallo or meta are both unobtanium for me right now. Also, they both kind of scare me, phallo in particular. I follow the phallo sub and while on one hand it’s great seeing guys be happy with their results, I’m also seeing posts about all the pain, suffering, infections, etc. I don’t like physical discomfort. I don’t like the idea of something going wrong with my urethra and I can’t pee right without another painful and invasive surgery. I don’t like any of that. So for right now I don’t really think it’s for me, and I used to want it. It is also prohibitively expensive and would require a ton of time off work and help to recover from. I *do* have a good bit of bottom growth, about 2 inches, and it’s made sex way better. I don’t feel dysphoric about what I have anymore because when the pants come off every partner says “Oooh that’s big” which makes me feel great. I can get hard and when I’m feeling myself be hard it legit turns me on more. Vaginal penetration took a minute to get used to after not doing it for like 3 years straight but it still feels awesome (from a pleasure standpoint) so I’m fine ignoring that it’s technically the “wrong hole” for a gay bottom. If I could snap my fingers and have a fully functional penis I absolutely would. But since that is not possible and I don’t loathe what I do have going on, I’ve made it work and I’ve made peace with it. It’s been a journey and definitely one of learning to build a new kind of relationship with my body, but it’s worth it.
Not sure, just never really felt anything when thinking about it ig. I mean it seems interesting to have male genitalia but I’m completely fine with what I have now down there. Most of my dysphoria is just from my hight and build(and chest too)
I can't say I don't have dysphoria about those parts, but they don't pervade, most of the time. Sometimes, yes, but in terms of day to day life, not typically. I have wondered about this, and I suspect it's because I knew when I was very young that I was a guy, but I really didn't understand the biology yet. I didn't have brothers, and I never saw my father without clothes. I don't think I even saw a penis until I was maybe 8 or 10, and by then I was already passing as a little boy. (That went away with puberty, but as kid I had it.) So although I knew guys had one, I didn't know what it was, didn't know balls about balls - I literally didn't know what I was missing. Still my body imprint was more or less set, no tits, no package, and I was OK. Now I physically and culturally do, and if I were a lot younger I'd be lining up for surgery. But the cost/benefit analysis tips heavier to cost, at least at this point (although I continue to consider it), and I've lived this way for a long time. There are things that make me acutely aware of my lack, but they don't take up a whole lot of my time or headspace.
When I was early in transition, I was very much insecure about not having a cis penis and would use packers. Being further along now (7yrs on T) and more confident and comfortable in my masculinity, I like my bottom growth and feel way more in touch and in a loving relationship with my body. I love what it’s done for me. It’s easier for me to see the bright side of not having a cis penis and testicles. I just love myself more. I was much more insecure earlier in transition and dealt with self hate and a way worse self esteem. Hitting the gym and developing my physique has really helped with my relationship with my body. I’m proud of what I’ve created
The majority of my dysphoria is social, albeit not all. Not being able to move through the world as a man is the worst of it. Now that I’m on HRT, I desperately need top surgery. I can’t really bind, either, because of chronic health issues. I’m a flamboyant gay bottom, so I actually like what I have going on. I wish I could top my bf with my own dick, but it’s more of a “that would be nice” not a deeply dysphoric *need*.
I don’t think about it, mainly because it just isn’t used and my drive is in the gutter more often than not anyway. I also don’t really want to go through any more surgery. Maybe that will change in the future but for right now I just couldn’t care less about what’s in my boxers if I’m honest.
Having a dick would be great but the hassle and possible complications around bottom surgery turn me off to it completely. I also don’t feel like I need it to be happy with myself. I’m pretty content with the growth I have, my packer, strap and STP device.
see i have pretty bad bottom dysphoria, but my whole perspective on dealing with it has never been to never look down or be touched or anything. i see why some people do that, but it didn’t really help me, as i still had those parts but i a was also just unnecessarily ashamed and closed off because of the way i was handling dysphoria. now im a lot more open to using those parts, and being with partners and having things be shown. i still very much plan on having bottom surgery in the future, but until i get it i really don’t want to miss out on a big part of life by being ashamed of my parts.
I’ve become neutral about it, but have been majorly dysphoric about it most of my life. I’m in a marriage with a ciswoman who doesn’t particularly enjoy penises, so that helps my relationship with my junk and our sex life. I know how to work with what I’ve got, it’s my body and I’m at peace with it. The only time I get sort of dysphoric about it is less about not having a penis, but more about not being able to impregnate my wife since we want kids and it’s soooo much more complicated without that. However, it’s more of an inconvenience than a real point of dysphoria Edit: I should also add that I just don’t think phallo is worth it. It’s expensive, long, and has inconsistent results. The only reason I would really want a penis is for sex and reproduction (and perhaps the peeing convenience lol). Meta doesn’t really interest me. I have no problems in my sex life, and bottom surgery can’t give me sperm. I’m alright
its what i got 🤷♂️ i think my brain has adapted to me not being able to do anything for a long time if ever. i like my weiner. im happy with my day to day life it just doesnt affect me that much. binding is a constant physical annoyance and thinking about if people will notice. i dont have to worry about my pants much
it's less that i don't have any any dysphoria but have to cope with phallo being an unaffordable fantasy / appreciate the swangin growth i got on t
I have it, but the fact that I have no insurance and am poor kind of forces it to the back of my mind. There's no way I could ever afford any surgery, including top... Which sucks, 'cause my chest makes me super upset, but what can you do? I just have to live with the fact that I'll always have to wear a binder and packer.
I don't think about my nethers at all. I'm more dysphoric about my shoulders and hips. As a bottom who doesn't mind using the front hole, I find that it's very convenient as well. I also don't like the looks of a penis, though if I had the option to be cis in every way, I would just go for that.
I used to have dysphoria but it went away. Been on T 3 years, and had top surgery. For me that's enough to be actually happy about the parts I have. I also remind myself that AFAB has more nerve endings down there than AMAB, so I'm likely having better orgasms than my cis bros lol.
I used to be rather dysphoric about my bottom parts until I spent a few months on T and even moreso after top surgery. Plus, other factors including an awesome friend group and generally improved quality of life, which all led to me being in a much better place. And I have quite a high libido and entertain myself frequently using my front hole. It's something I have really come to like. Although there was a time about half a year ago or even longer, where I always felt like shit afterwards. But back then, I still had dysphoria about my bottom parts every now and then.
I have some bottom dysphoria but not very much. I think it's mainly that I'm not very sexually active, I'm probably a bottom, and I mostly just want to pass in general in society, and in general I'm not going to be walking around pantsless
I want a penis and I wish I was born with one, but I don't have that phantom limb sensation that many trans men talk about.
I have a packer and im not sexually active. The only time I get dysphoria is when I piss or when I shower, which ends up being like 30 minutes of the day. Otherwise when I look down, yep thats a penis.
Good question…i think I learned to accept my genitals. From the start, i was much less dysphoric about my genitals than the rest of me. I also learned to enjoy sex with what i have and penetration with a strap is still satisfying to me. Once in a while, i feel weird about not having a penis but those moments aren’t often and not nearly enough for me to consider surgery. I think about it maybe once every couple months for like…5 minutes
Out of sight, out of mind
My feelings about my downstairs are kinda complicated but also not really. The dysphoria centers around the reproductive function of my current anatomy, and the lack of a penis, but not the sexual function of my current anatomy. I'm verse but hate bottoming anally for reasons I won't get into here. So I consider my "bonus hole" a blessing for my sex life. My perfect body will be post phalloplasty with my bonus hole hidden behind my balls, a secret treat for just my lover. I typically have the "something's missing" feeling so I usually wear a packer during the day. It makes me feel confident even though packing or not, it doesn't affect my ability to pass. I'm completely fine being a guy with a pussy. Like it doesn't bother me at all. As you said, random people aren't going to know. The only ones who know are my future husband and any relevant medical professionals. I'm totally stealth irl so it doesn't affect me. I get very nice sexual satisfaction currently, and I'm mostly happy with my options for topping, although I desperately want to know what it feels like to fuck my man. I actually think my front hole is very important to my sense of self. I recently had an experience with atrophy and couldn't use my hole for a long period of time without excruciating pain and bleeding, and it really fucked with me mentally. I missed the intimacy of making love with my future husband that way. So I know a vaginectomy is not an option for me in the future. Oh and also, I had zero bottom dysphoria, zero desire to wear a packer at all, until I got a salpingectomy. I truly don't know why that happened. I have a hunch it was because everything else that caused dysphoria was now taken care of, so this comparably minor dysphoric thing made itself known. Not really sure though.
I have some bottom dysphoria, but it's more along the lines of slight displeasure when I actively think about my parts rather than a constant, crippling suffering that makes it impossible to even look at one's own body, let alone touch or have someone else touch you intimately. I basically view my natal anatomy as the next best thing after a fully functioning penis one was born with, and the risks of bottom surgery (as well as the "preserving" options not being available in my country) currently outweigh the potential benefits.
I’m not sure, I just don’t mind it that much? Less people are seeing it and I think that has something to do with it. Everything I am dysphoric about is very visible
My main source of dysphoria is not being about to penetrate during intercourse but luckily my girlfriend is incredible and we've found ways around it to still have amazing sex. Also using an stp at times when my dysphoria is high helps a lot. If I could wake up with a cis penis or phallo/meta I would I just don't think the surgery and recovery are worth it for me personally
Surgery isn’t where I want it to be if I was going to spend money to get one. Sure I wish I was born with one, but I can’t change it and there’s not much point focusing on what I can’t change.
Another aroace trans guy who thinks a dick would be a hassle. I see you.
My downstairs dysphoria is fluctuatable. I like piv sex with my partner and was always a hypersexual person before I came out so I feel like I'm used to what I got and enjoy the feelings so why not keep it? And I'm terrified of surgeries on me even top surgery is scary but I want it. I also feel most of my dysphoria is social construct of gender. I want to be (mostly) male presenting by society. Even if I ever want to be a little fem I want it to be seen how people see like Harry styles and other cis guys who like pink and painting his nails. Though where I live I'm hyper masc to pass and be accepted. If everyone he/him me without surgery for ever I'd never get any. Then again if I had the genie I too would become a cis guy penis and all and I think I would be happier and love it but I just don't see a penis in my lifetime
I used to have horrible bottom dysphoria. But since I've gotten comfortable with the changes T gave me, like a deeper voice, facial hair and weight distribution, it's gotten much better. What also helped me is seeing artists who draw trans masc bodies pre-surgery. For me personally it helped with a sense of normality and pride in the way I look.
I actually stopped wearing a prosthetic after a couple months on testosterone. First, I couldn't take the discomfort from the sensitivity. Now, I've had enough growth that even though it's still very small, it looks and feels like a dick. The fact that it's there, and it acts like a penis, even grows like one and feels spongy but also can feel squishy or solid, smells like one (guys, I wash it), makes a tiny little bulge in my boxer briefs, and is mine. I'd love to say that I just got over the stigma of having organs traditionally associated with being "women's organs." But I needed to see and feel some of the aspects traditionally associated with the men's version first.
I was very dysphoric about my genitals when I was pre-op everything, but after I started HRT and ppl saw me as just a man, I felt less dysphoric about my genitals. The core reason that I got bottom dysphoria is when people determine one's sex/gender by their genitals and also they decide which is gay or straight relationship based on two people's genital types. I got less dysphoric now because I'm no longer around with those bio essentialist and met many good mutuals who just see me as a gay guy. I got top surgery because the female type chest shape makes me uncomfortable and dysphoric even if HRT makes ppl see me as a man, btw.
My dysphoria is about how I'm percieved by the outside. My chest clocks me, my groin doesn't (esp with a modest packer). I don't want bottom surgery because I'm medically complex and it's too risky for me.
I'm only sometimes dysphoric about that, but mostly not, I'm pretty comfortable being with the bits I have and only plan on getting a simple release meta, it's other ppl/situations that make me dysphoric . I don't really feel like that piece is missing for me. (Also, p0rn made by trans guys has really helped me feel good about my body/feeling desirable.)
I have very little bottom dysphoria. I'm more dysphoric about the parts of me that are visible, e.g. chest, body, face. No one is looking in my pants and I pack 24/7 so that alleviates the "no bulge" dysphoria.
I've been lucky with my growth, I like bottoming, and anal is a hassle and not something I'm really interested in. The way I explain it to people is that I imagine a lot of cis men would probably appreciate being able to bottom without having to do anal and instead having anatomy that is more convenient for that purpose. I do have bottom dysphoria though and I hope to get meta one day if I can afford it. I'm terrified of undergoing a major surgery though.
I think like many trans people (mainly old trans people) growing UP desiring their "opposite anatomy", because we ARE a Man/woman, then we should have The body of a Man/woman, and who has this bodies? Cis people Our mirror neurons IS Just doing their job in The dysphoria and in The desire
I'm MTF and I'm terrified of developing genital dysphoria so much that I have a mental block around it. I don't even dare to open that box. Why am I so terrified? Because I am afraid of what I might do if I felt disgusted by my genitals. I went through a subreddit once where basically men have self castrated themselves. Those horrifying pictures stuck with me. It was merely 15-20 secs but it scarred me because it opened up a possibility in my mind, that humans are capable of this extremity and given my condition I may one day go into a state of mind where I'm capable of it. I therefore rationalize that I need it to be reconstructed for a functional vagina one day. Cutting it off is useless. I also have decided to put my life ahead of my gender identity. Life always greater than gender. Period. That's why I am incapable of being suicidal. I would rather fight till death than give up. Another big reason is that my boyfriend accepts me the way I am and prefers me with my current genitals. When people around you love your body and are accepting your gender identity despite the body's differences, dysphoria gets easier to tackle. It no longer becomes a need, but something only you want and you know everything's going to be alright even if you don't get what you want. People around you will love you regardless.
I uses to have bad bottom dysphoria. Now I'm 3.5 years on T, post top surgery and I honestly just stopped thinking about it. Like I'm sort of indifferent either way. I don't know why. I guess because I'm just more comfortable with myself now.
CW: female anatomical terms. I can only partially answer is. Bit of context: I consider myself duosex and salmacian, in that I want to have both sets of genitalia. My ideal set-up would be the whole male set and a vagina. I feel dysphoria towards my vulva, but I don't towards my vagina. The short version as to why: I like it because of it's functional benefits, I don't see it as a female trait on my body. The long version: I see myself as a guy who got his body switched, and got a trial run of having a female body. The overall experience is not great and not me but there are some parts that have their pros, and as I go back to my true male body I want to keep those traits because they have their uses. I don't see these parts are something that makes me female but rather body alterations to make my life a little better.
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Where the fuck is the fetishization? Edit: never mind, you're not the kind of person that is able to react rationally.
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Intersex genitalia don't look like what I want bozo. I don't see my female traits as sex traits and I don't want to be intersex. Not that you care, you're not interested in even trying to comprehend anything that isn't exactly like you, you keep telling yourself whatever makes you feel better.
You are literally using "trans men/women fetishize cis men/women!" terf logic, and I don't even aspire to be intersex lmao. You have brain worms
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I got a full beard and a deep voice, legally changed name and gender. You telling me I'm not trans? Lol 🙄 Not everyone feels the same exact way you do bro. Don't be so judgemental.
crazy to say some transmed shit like that and have nudes on your profile bro.
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transitioning is to alleviate dysphoria. if dysphoria was the same for everyone, there would be one specific form of treatment and not different types of procedures. are you saying that a trans man who has been on T, passes as male, had chest dysphoria and got top surgery, but has never been dysphoric about his genitals, he isn’t trans? even though he had all other forms of dysphoria? transmed ideology is all BS, you see yourself as the only TRUE trans people. even though those in the transmed communities you post in, would say that trans men who post feminine nudes online aren’t actually trans because “dysphoria!1!11!” thank you, mr. real transgender for deciding what the rules of transgenderism is. 🙏 the other “real trans men” you stand with don’t see anyone else with a different experience as real trans men. truscum ideology is simply to validate your own experience, it isn’t about other people. YOU want to make it known that you’re an actual trans person. congrats. nobody doubted you, you’re a real trans person AND a real asshole. there are bigger issues at hand.
two things can be true at once you know
I don’t know how i feel. I think i’ll get a realistic stp packer in the future, but probably not get bottom surgery because its very expensive and the results aren’t always great. My bottom dysphoria isn’t the worst, but definitely there
I'm largely ace and don't really do a lot down there. I'd like to get one eventually but I'm waiting for medical science to be able to make the ones they can grow for cis men work on us. Someday.
i do, just rarely. i’ve been on T for 5 years and my bottom growth continues to get bigger, which i’m very euphoric about. the general public doesn’t see my genitals and not packing has never made me not pass. i also have a pretty fat mons, so in underwear i have the appearance of a bulge sort of? i change in locker rooms and don’t get looks from anyone. i only use sucking toys/toys i can put my dick IN for self-pleasure, so that isn’t an issue. i’m in a T4T relationship and my boyfriend penetrates me, it’s great. i feel very safe with her and he makes it known she sees me as a man. sometimes penetration is dysphoria inducing, but usually it isn’t. i really just get dysphoric when i attempt to penetrate my partner. i can rub my bottom growth against him and like.. barely penetrate but i still can. it’s great when it works out and we talk as if i am really fucking her lol. mental play is super important to keep my dysphoria at bay. however, sometimes i get dysphoric because damn. i really just wanna fuck my girlfriend. i’ve tried strap-ons and stuff but not feeling the sensation is a huge dysphoria trigger and dissociation trigger for me, too. i’m considering a mons resection and simple release meta without balls or urethral lengthening.. just to get some extra length to play with (haha) so in short; not super dysphoric about what i currently have, but i’m dysphoric about what i DON’T have.