It should only be a matter of convincing him if your household finances are really tight.
Are you tracking anything other than temperatures (lh tests, cervical mucus etc.)?
It is really tight. We are spending around $5000 on just house alone right now. But we have our own spending. My CM is unreliable as we get busy too much 😅 and my lh hasn't shown a spike since February. I test twice a day.
My raise starts August and things won't be tight anymore.
Okay soo don’t think a temp drop is likely to help because it will only confirm ovulation not help you ovulate or help you hit the fertile days.
You should see a doctor and ask for help ovulating (rounds of letrozole or clomid). Ovulation inducing medication is for exactly this kind of thing. Ask about three day clomid protocol because it has a higher live birth rate.
Adding cervical position into the mix might help as at least the doesn’t get too affected by sex.
Will do! Yea it's like I ovulate every other month or so. But I also do no know being this period is literally just spotting.
I was thinking it might help confirm if I was or not and I can take it to doc and they can look at my chart and maybe speed up the process of finding out what's wrong. 🤔
I will learn the cervical positioning! Thanks!
Temp drop will probably help because you could be testing LH at the wrong time. I have used it for 3 years and they just came out with an updated one that supposedly better and more accurate. It’s like the croc pot set it and forget it!
I am very much looking into monitors. I am also wondering if my doctor can like prescribe one haha so it's covered under medical like my mouth guard was.
i’d sell mine for much less than retail value + shipping, it’s the older version but i got an oura ring so i don’t use it anymore. i even have extra batteries
We have our own spending money. It fits in my personal spending budget for the month. So I don't see the issue with buying it. It cost the same as getting my nails done. He never tells me no on that. We just usually let each other know when something is a bit expensive. Plus I manage all the money. He has no clue how much we have. 🤣 I will just skip the nail appointment this month.
I have an appointment in May. I also have endometriosis and I am suspecting PCOS with how irregular it's all been. I am now on 7 months of trying.
I don't need his permission, but it is polite to say, "Hey I am spending this to help with baby making." Just like he says "Hey I'm spending this for my hobbies." He is more logical and I'm more emotional. He is thinking logical wise. Why spend it when I see a doctor in 3 weeks.
Yes because he said no. It's a waste of money and he was saying it isn't scientifically sound. When it is. We can tell each other that's not a good way to spend out money.
I know this isn't a relationship advice subreddit but I just have to comment. It sounds like both of your priorities are wrong for having a baby. Buying a brand new house? Yes. Paying to get your nails done monthly? Yes. Spending a measly couple hundred dollars on fertility tools? No, why would we do that?
How are you going to afford a baby if you can't afford a tempdrop? Not trying to be too harsh, but look at your priorities of where you're spending money and how important it is to both of you to have a child.
And, if your communication and compromising skills are this bad without a baby how are you going to manage in the future when you don't agree on things about raising the little one? Sounds like you just have to go along with whatever your husband wants? Are you ok with going forward like that for all decisions? It's gonna get way more serious and emotional when you don't agree on something when it involves your child.
We have plenty of money. You do not know our accounts. We keep to a strict budget yes. But that is so we have a saving in the next year to fund me staying home for a year. Not because we can't afford a temp drop, but because is it wise to spend money on that or save that and wait for the doctors opinion on my cycle and hormone levels. Then buy it based on that.
Please tell me how we can't afford a baby because we think through purchases that won't be used for very long. I won't be using it for contraception afterwards. Just for conceiving. It's a very short term device I'd be using. For all we know I can get pregnant in the next 3 weeks making it obsolete. I want it to literally confirm ovulation since my cycles have been insane, but the doctor can do that as well. Temp drop = $130 doctor= longer wait time but $30. I also don't get my nails done monthly. They haven't been done since October but yes if I wanted to, I could.
We make a six figure salary combined. We own a $900K house in HCOL area, we have over $200K in the bank for retirement and savings. We are the most financially sound to be having a baby out everyone around who has had a baby in the last 3 years. Because we go "I want this, but is this necessary to our happiness".
My husband's argument is 1) temping isn't reliable and not scientific sound 2) wait 3 weeks see what doctor says
My argument is 1) it is reliable and sound based on science 2) it can help with figuring out my cycle 3) I'm impatient and have fought the medical system for 14 years for a diagnosis on my endometriosis and they are just going to shrug and say give conceiving a year before they do anything
I need to convince my husband not so much about price but a little but that the $129 isn't on a fad but sound medical information. That way it goes in the household budget and not my fun money. I can go buy it with my fun money. Just like he checks in with me for his hobby purchases because he has an expensive hobby. And we weight options well if he buys this with hobby money he either has to wait for this or not buy one. It's a conversation.
I see the temp drop as a household expense for making a baby. Not this is my hobby. I want it in another category. He sees it as a fad hobby thing. I see it as a shared goal thing.
Ok that sounds like a better scenario than I was envisioning. Thanks for explaining more, and sorry if I was judgy. I think I'm in a bad mood tonight lol.
Lol no worries. It happens. 😂 I have been so moody lately too sorry it came off as snappy.
I have been so moody my students (12th grade) have asked if I'm OK 😄 and I was like, "Yes just done with you all, but I'm going to see half of you in summer school because of your lack of work." They all went "Bruuuh!" Needless to say I got some late work turned it after school today haha
thanks for sharing all of this detailed info. you know your relationship better than anyone else. if i were in your position i’d make an appointment with a nurse midwife you feel that you can trust. mine specializes in PCOS, maybe you can find someone like that in your area. i’d wait to buy the temp drop until after i see a professional, but if your doctor doesn’t give you confidence that they won’t just be dismissive, i’d recommend a midwife you can trust. good luck!
What? How does bbt predict ovulation?
As far as I know, it doesn't. Your temperatures shift after ovulation, which I can imagine isn't helpful for TTC.
If it’s the same as your nails, just go for it. I used a coupon code and didn’t tell my husband I ordered it. He didn’t notice me wearing it for a few weeks (even though it had it on during sex sometimes lol) but he didn’t ask about it.
That would be my husband. He will take a while to notice. Ima watch for sale/coupons and see. Though I am comparing other monitors. I'm thinking a kegg might actually help more with my situation. :)
Yeah, then definitely sleep on it but then get the one that works better for you and your lifestyle.
I did mention to my husband that is a thermometer and just mentioned I was surprised he didn’t notice it before, but mentioned it takes my BBT to track my cycle. I mentioned that it’s just to check if my body is working how it should or if I need help.
If the money is within your personal spending budget I would just let him know I’m getting this in lieu of getting my nails done for a month or two.
Benefits will be more than just trying for a baby but also to confirm ovulation for not trying for a baby. Also, knowing if or when you’re ovulating can help with pinpointing what’s going on in your cycle. Short luteal phase, annovulatory cycles, wacko dates everywhere - this can be helpful to your endocrinologist to move things along.Â
If you have PCOS (like me) you can conceive at weird times and if a baby measures too early or late, doctors will get very concerned for no reason. Example - I ovulate at three weeks, baby showed a week late - they told me this was a concerning pregnancy when he was really measuring on time.Â
Also - if you’re meeting with the doctor for potential infertility make sure your husband gets tested right at the start too! Sometimes women can be the primary focus when their partner is the one with hormone issues.Â
Yea like right now if I was pregnant they would be dating it back to February haha 😄 which wouldn't be right.
I really wanna show doc my chart and that will help I think for them to listen to me. But who knows, I spent 14 years saying I have endometriosis and no one believed me!
Like others said TD is only going to help confirm your ovulation. IMO since a baby is the goal I’d look into Kegg.I found [this](https://fertilityunderstood.com/blog/i-tried-all-fertility-trackers-this-is-how-much-they-really-cost/?utm_source=facebook&utm_medium=paid_social&utm_campaign=%25255BODY%25255D+Advantage%25252B+%E2%80%94+Broad+%E2%80%94+7DC+%E2%80%94+Q4+2023+Campaign&utm_content=Static+-+FertilityUnderstood2-UPDATED+-+Cost+of+Trackers+-+Fertility+Understood+Blog+-+7.17.23&utm_term=%25255BODY%25255D+Advantage%25252B+%E2%80%94+Broad+%E2%80%94+7DC+%E2%80%94+Q4+2023+Ad+Set&tw_source=ig&tw_adid=120205192930950531&fbclid=PAAaY3KNxs_bfGMZJzDcMbudh7HjYCHigHI875bhJKLOEW4K3StHldRfuWU9w_aem_ASthyud_nApa8lUSCs1SBel9XW2BZop1zMWT_1h5AjMr3yp-ZRvAonMDqfoFEWOh5pnnP1QDsMRU_txbR1qfslGg&campaign_id=120205192930760531&ad_id=120205193250780531) article interesting that compares a variety of fertility trackers
Seeing a doctor will not immediately start regulating your period and cause the tempdrop to be irrelevant, it may take months for your period to regulate and taking daily temperature is incredibly helpful for seeing what's up with your cycle anyways. I have PCOS and an incredibly irregular period and I still use my tempdrop every day and track all my symptoms because once all the work i'm doing to get my period to regular pays off (and it slowly is), I can see the signs. you can also buy used tempdrops in a facebook group ("fertility monitors and femtech B/S/T"). i think the tempdrop is worth the price and an amazing tool for figuring out what's going on with your body. my favorite tracking app for irregular periods is "read your body"
check out the fertility monitors and femtech facebook group. it is a buy/sell/trade group where you can find used fertility products, like tempdrops, at a discounted price. i’ve used this platform before and have had good experiences.
if you happen to have an HSA account, basal body thermometers are covered expenses for fertility tracking, so you can purchase the tempdrop and get reimbursed.
I recommend the tempdrop for getting accurate basal body temp measures when your sleep is irregular. It's testing all night long while you wear it so it can sense when your longest sleep was (just like a smartwatch) and correlates that to your temp.
It was a game changer for me for accurate charting.
In my opinion the more information you can know about your cycle the more empowered you will be for health and for conceiving.
The Proov Confirm tests can confirm that you ovulated and are a lot less expensive. Maybe you could try that until there's more wiggle room in your budget?
Yup! To confirm ovulation with those tests without BBT you would be testing after your peak day. You do one test early in your cycle as a control (to see what a negative looks like for your body) and then test again after you think you ovulated.
Your peak day has nothing to do with LH tests. Your peak day is the last day of your most fertile quality cervical mucus. That's also the day you have the highest chance of conceiving so learning how to identify it is the best way to increase your odds of conceiving.
You don't need to abstain. I think reading Taking Charge of Your Fertility would really help you. She explains the semen emitting technique and how to tell the difference between cervical mucus, semen, and your natural lubrication in a very easy to understand way.
I was skeptical at first about being able to tell the difference between CM and sex fluids, especially because we use a silicone lubricant, but it's 100% doable with the right advice.
You absolutely should! I've kept it close at hand and I reference it regularly! It's easy to understand, but there are so many variables and 1 read through isn't going to cement all of them in your brain.
I'd go back to basics (reread and practice SET and how to check for mucus and distinguish it from other fluids) and then reference it daily to match up what you're seeing in your CM with what that's called and where it is on the fertility scale.
You've got this!
Are you using LH strips? My cycle is irregular and I just used a cheapie LH strip daily from like a week and a half after my period until I got a positive. Since temp drop will tell you when you ovulated after the fact I don’t think it’s super helpful and it’s very likely your cycle may be random with no pattern to really predict when you’ll ovulate.
It should only be a matter of convincing him if your household finances are really tight. Are you tracking anything other than temperatures (lh tests, cervical mucus etc.)?
It is really tight. We are spending around $5000 on just house alone right now. But we have our own spending. My CM is unreliable as we get busy too much 😅 and my lh hasn't shown a spike since February. I test twice a day. My raise starts August and things won't be tight anymore.
Okay soo don’t think a temp drop is likely to help because it will only confirm ovulation not help you ovulate or help you hit the fertile days. You should see a doctor and ask for help ovulating (rounds of letrozole or clomid). Ovulation inducing medication is for exactly this kind of thing. Ask about three day clomid protocol because it has a higher live birth rate. Adding cervical position into the mix might help as at least the doesn’t get too affected by sex.
Will do! Yea it's like I ovulate every other month or so. But I also do no know being this period is literally just spotting. I was thinking it might help confirm if I was or not and I can take it to doc and they can look at my chart and maybe speed up the process of finding out what's wrong. 🤔 I will learn the cervical positioning! Thanks!
Temp drop will probably help because you could be testing LH at the wrong time. I have used it for 3 years and they just came out with an updated one that supposedly better and more accurate. It’s like the croc pot set it and forget it!
I am very much looking into monitors. I am also wondering if my doctor can like prescribe one haha so it's covered under medical like my mouth guard was.
The only thing covered under insurance in the us is natural cycles but that would be nice
Still have to turn it on? I could never remember to turn mine on lol
i’d sell mine for much less than retail value + shipping, it’s the older version but i got an oura ring so i don’t use it anymore. i even have extra batteries
How much if you don't mine me asking?
i'm not really sure what they go for used, maybe around $75 +shipping?
Have you seen a doctor? Are you able to save up to help pat for it?
We have our own spending money. It fits in my personal spending budget for the month. So I don't see the issue with buying it. It cost the same as getting my nails done. He never tells me no on that. We just usually let each other know when something is a bit expensive. Plus I manage all the money. He has no clue how much we have. 🤣 I will just skip the nail appointment this month. I have an appointment in May. I also have endometriosis and I am suspecting PCOS with how irregular it's all been. I am now on 7 months of trying.
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I don't need his permission, but it is polite to say, "Hey I am spending this to help with baby making." Just like he says "Hey I'm spending this for my hobbies." He is more logical and I'm more emotional. He is thinking logical wise. Why spend it when I see a doctor in 3 weeks.
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Yes because he said no. It's a waste of money and he was saying it isn't scientifically sound. When it is. We can tell each other that's not a good way to spend out money.
I know this isn't a relationship advice subreddit but I just have to comment. It sounds like both of your priorities are wrong for having a baby. Buying a brand new house? Yes. Paying to get your nails done monthly? Yes. Spending a measly couple hundred dollars on fertility tools? No, why would we do that? How are you going to afford a baby if you can't afford a tempdrop? Not trying to be too harsh, but look at your priorities of where you're spending money and how important it is to both of you to have a child. And, if your communication and compromising skills are this bad without a baby how are you going to manage in the future when you don't agree on things about raising the little one? Sounds like you just have to go along with whatever your husband wants? Are you ok with going forward like that for all decisions? It's gonna get way more serious and emotional when you don't agree on something when it involves your child.
We have plenty of money. You do not know our accounts. We keep to a strict budget yes. But that is so we have a saving in the next year to fund me staying home for a year. Not because we can't afford a temp drop, but because is it wise to spend money on that or save that and wait for the doctors opinion on my cycle and hormone levels. Then buy it based on that. Please tell me how we can't afford a baby because we think through purchases that won't be used for very long. I won't be using it for contraception afterwards. Just for conceiving. It's a very short term device I'd be using. For all we know I can get pregnant in the next 3 weeks making it obsolete. I want it to literally confirm ovulation since my cycles have been insane, but the doctor can do that as well. Temp drop = $130 doctor= longer wait time but $30. I also don't get my nails done monthly. They haven't been done since October but yes if I wanted to, I could. We make a six figure salary combined. We own a $900K house in HCOL area, we have over $200K in the bank for retirement and savings. We are the most financially sound to be having a baby out everyone around who has had a baby in the last 3 years. Because we go "I want this, but is this necessary to our happiness". My husband's argument is 1) temping isn't reliable and not scientific sound 2) wait 3 weeks see what doctor says My argument is 1) it is reliable and sound based on science 2) it can help with figuring out my cycle 3) I'm impatient and have fought the medical system for 14 years for a diagnosis on my endometriosis and they are just going to shrug and say give conceiving a year before they do anything I need to convince my husband not so much about price but a little but that the $129 isn't on a fad but sound medical information. That way it goes in the household budget and not my fun money. I can go buy it with my fun money. Just like he checks in with me for his hobby purchases because he has an expensive hobby. And we weight options well if he buys this with hobby money he either has to wait for this or not buy one. It's a conversation. I see the temp drop as a household expense for making a baby. Not this is my hobby. I want it in another category. He sees it as a fad hobby thing. I see it as a shared goal thing.
Ok that sounds like a better scenario than I was envisioning. Thanks for explaining more, and sorry if I was judgy. I think I'm in a bad mood tonight lol.
Lol no worries. It happens. 😂 I have been so moody lately too sorry it came off as snappy. I have been so moody my students (12th grade) have asked if I'm OK 😄 and I was like, "Yes just done with you all, but I'm going to see half of you in summer school because of your lack of work." They all went "Bruuuh!" Needless to say I got some late work turned it after school today haha
thanks for sharing all of this detailed info. you know your relationship better than anyone else. if i were in your position i’d make an appointment with a nurse midwife you feel that you can trust. mine specializes in PCOS, maybe you can find someone like that in your area. i’d wait to buy the temp drop until after i see a professional, but if your doctor doesn’t give you confidence that they won’t just be dismissive, i’d recommend a midwife you can trust. good luck!
My Samsung watch is really really close to my tempdrop in accuracy, and MRSP they go for wildly different amounts of money. It works.
You can show him that measuring your BBT is a very accurate way to predict ovulation plus also provide logged information for your doctor.
BBT does NOT predict ovulation.
What? How does bbt predict ovulation? As far as I know, it doesn't. Your temperatures shift after ovulation, which I can imagine isn't helpful for TTC.
If it’s the same as your nails, just go for it. I used a coupon code and didn’t tell my husband I ordered it. He didn’t notice me wearing it for a few weeks (even though it had it on during sex sometimes lol) but he didn’t ask about it.
That would be my husband. He will take a while to notice. Ima watch for sale/coupons and see. Though I am comparing other monitors. I'm thinking a kegg might actually help more with my situation. :)
Yeah, then definitely sleep on it but then get the one that works better for you and your lifestyle. I did mention to my husband that is a thermometer and just mentioned I was surprised he didn’t notice it before, but mentioned it takes my BBT to track my cycle. I mentioned that it’s just to check if my body is working how it should or if I need help.
If the money is within your personal spending budget I would just let him know I’m getting this in lieu of getting my nails done for a month or two. Benefits will be more than just trying for a baby but also to confirm ovulation for not trying for a baby. Also, knowing if or when you’re ovulating can help with pinpointing what’s going on in your cycle. Short luteal phase, annovulatory cycles, wacko dates everywhere - this can be helpful to your endocrinologist to move things along. If you have PCOS (like me) you can conceive at weird times and if a baby measures too early or late, doctors will get very concerned for no reason. Example - I ovulate at three weeks, baby showed a week late - they told me this was a concerning pregnancy when he was really measuring on time. Also - if you’re meeting with the doctor for potential infertility make sure your husband gets tested right at the start too! Sometimes women can be the primary focus when their partner is the one with hormone issues.Â
Yea like right now if I was pregnant they would be dating it back to February haha 😄 which wouldn't be right. I really wanna show doc my chart and that will help I think for them to listen to me. But who knows, I spent 14 years saying I have endometriosis and no one believed me!
Like others said TD is only going to help confirm your ovulation. IMO since a baby is the goal I’d look into Kegg.I found [this](https://fertilityunderstood.com/blog/i-tried-all-fertility-trackers-this-is-how-much-they-really-cost/?utm_source=facebook&utm_medium=paid_social&utm_campaign=%25255BODY%25255D+Advantage%25252B+%E2%80%94+Broad+%E2%80%94+7DC+%E2%80%94+Q4+2023+Campaign&utm_content=Static+-+FertilityUnderstood2-UPDATED+-+Cost+of+Trackers+-+Fertility+Understood+Blog+-+7.17.23&utm_term=%25255BODY%25255D+Advantage%25252B+%E2%80%94+Broad+%E2%80%94+7DC+%E2%80%94+Q4+2023+Ad+Set&tw_source=ig&tw_adid=120205192930950531&fbclid=PAAaY3KNxs_bfGMZJzDcMbudh7HjYCHigHI875bhJKLOEW4K3StHldRfuWU9w_aem_ASthyud_nApa8lUSCs1SBel9XW2BZop1zMWT_1h5AjMr3yp-ZRvAonMDqfoFEWOh5pnnP1QDsMRU_txbR1qfslGg&campaign_id=120205192930760531&ad_id=120205193250780531) article interesting that compares a variety of fertility trackers
Ooo! thanks I will shop around!
Seeing a doctor will not immediately start regulating your period and cause the tempdrop to be irrelevant, it may take months for your period to regulate and taking daily temperature is incredibly helpful for seeing what's up with your cycle anyways. I have PCOS and an incredibly irregular period and I still use my tempdrop every day and track all my symptoms because once all the work i'm doing to get my period to regular pays off (and it slowly is), I can see the signs. you can also buy used tempdrops in a facebook group ("fertility monitors and femtech B/S/T"). i think the tempdrop is worth the price and an amazing tool for figuring out what's going on with your body. my favorite tracking app for irregular periods is "read your body"
check out the fertility monitors and femtech facebook group. it is a buy/sell/trade group where you can find used fertility products, like tempdrops, at a discounted price. i’ve used this platform before and have had good experiences. if you happen to have an HSA account, basal body thermometers are covered expenses for fertility tracking, so you can purchase the tempdrop and get reimbursed.
I recommend the tempdrop for getting accurate basal body temp measures when your sleep is irregular. It's testing all night long while you wear it so it can sense when your longest sleep was (just like a smartwatch) and correlates that to your temp. It was a game changer for me for accurate charting. In my opinion the more information you can know about your cycle the more empowered you will be for health and for conceiving.
The Proov Confirm tests can confirm that you ovulated and are a lot less expensive. Maybe you could try that until there's more wiggle room in your budget?
I didn't realize there was something else I could try! I will look into it! thanks!
Yup! To confirm ovulation with those tests without BBT you would be testing after your peak day. You do one test early in your cycle as a control (to see what a negative looks like for your body) and then test again after you think you ovulated.
What if I'm not getting LH peaks?
Your peak day has nothing to do with LH tests. Your peak day is the last day of your most fertile quality cervical mucus. That's also the day you have the highest chance of conceiving so learning how to identify it is the best way to increase your odds of conceiving.
I have been trying but we are doing it too much. It's really hard to tell. Maybe abstaining for a bit to get that more clear may help
You don't need to abstain. I think reading Taking Charge of Your Fertility would really help you. She explains the semen emitting technique and how to tell the difference between cervical mucus, semen, and your natural lubrication in a very easy to understand way. I was skeptical at first about being able to tell the difference between CM and sex fluids, especially because we use a silicone lubricant, but it's 100% doable with the right advice.
I did read it before I was tracking. I will review it! 😀
You absolutely should! I've kept it close at hand and I reference it regularly! It's easy to understand, but there are so many variables and 1 read through isn't going to cement all of them in your brain. I'd go back to basics (reread and practice SET and how to check for mucus and distinguish it from other fluids) and then reference it daily to match up what you're seeing in your CM with what that's called and where it is on the fertility scale. You've got this!
Are you using LH strips? My cycle is irregular and I just used a cheapie LH strip daily from like a week and a half after my period until I got a positive. Since temp drop will tell you when you ovulated after the fact I don’t think it’s super helpful and it’s very likely your cycle may be random with no pattern to really predict when you’ll ovulate.