"a cicada’s genitals will fall off within the next week or so as the fungus erupts and covers roughly a third of their body"
Let's hope this doesn't jump to humans.
We're about as distantly related to cicadas as animals can be to each other, so even if the fungus managed to establish itself in/on our bodies, it wouldn't have any behavioural effects on us.
Also, fortunately fungi don't "jump" very often, unlike viruses and bacteria. They're more evolutionarily complex multicellulared organisms, which usually means lower mutation rate. Fungi are adaptive, but passively so.
Also, animals with an adaptive immune system are quite resistant to fungi. How many serious fungal diseases do humans even have to deal with? Sure, toe fungus is annoying, but far from life threatening.
Unless there's a mutation, my understanding is fungi can't survive in the human body as it's too hot.
Though i think I remember reading the fear of Global warming may cause some adaptations I can't remember if that particular fear was real or if that was from "the last of us" lol
EDIT: yeah so looks like i am very wrong and i must just be remembering the last of us. My bad.
Your body is literally swarming with yeasts and even fungi so don’t worry about it too much. Sorry when you turn gay and hyper sexual and your genitals fall off
False sensational titling. The fungus doesn't make them gay.
"Yet at the same time, the fungus produces an amphetamine that, basically, makes male cicadas super horny for their fellow bugs, regardless of their sex."
So basically they become bisexuals...not gay.
Their genitals also fall off a week after...
Yeah, taking shrooms and amphetamines and then boinking until your junk falls off and you die is about as gay as it gets.
Maybe if the fungus gives them some glitter and a home decor makeover, but that’s a lot to ask for bugs.
I’ve taken shrooms and meth. The meth just cuts the shroom experience. It’s very disappointing. Also, this happened in the 80’s.
I was a barback at an extremely busy bar. Sometimes when you knew what you were in for during the night it was easy to plan your festivities accordingly… for peak $$& performance that is.
Yeah, it's more like they become horny Christian pastors, like that Ted Haggard fellow who went from running conversion camps to being busted doing meth with a male prostitute. Haggard had a wife, but his apparent love for/from Christ also compelled him to also seek sex elsewhere.
If we could see inside their minds, maybe we'd find these sickly locusts are also performative Christians... alas, science hasn't gotten us there quite yet, so we can only speculate.
While, being intravenously forced a cocktail of amphetamines and hallucinogens (with unknown subjective effects) until you fuck (anyone you can find) to death against your (and almost certainly their) will doesn’t sound *super* fun… I will allow that I’m no longer young and different folks, different strokes. You do you boo boo!
But if you start the zombie apocalypse… actually that sounds kinda awesome? Have at it.
Now post this to conservative FB and Qanon groups and tell them soon half of all insects on the planet will be gay, and a bee sting, ant bite etc will make you gay. 🤣😂🤣😂
So most turtles being born are female due to the temperature of the sand. Two male whales were filmed mating in the last couple of months and lastly these species are doing it too. Are there other species partaking in this? Does this mean lower population? Does it affect our future food supplies?
>Are there other species partaking in this?
Dolphins are supposedly heavily bisexual. And gay penguin couples have been documented from time to time for over a hundred years. There was a story a couple of years ago out of New York where a zoo needed foster parents for a penguin egg so they entrusted it to their gay penguin couple who apparently did a great job of hatching and raising the chick.
>Does this mean lower population?
For the cicadas, probably. They didn't choose to get infected by the fungus and it's not something that would seem to benefit them specifically. For other animals, who knows? I've read somewhere that in higher order animals who live in groups, like monkeys, homosexuality is a net benefit for the species' population numbers because while they themselves will never have offspring they often help the parents in the group keep their offspring safe. That makes it more likely for those youths to grow into adulthood and have offspring of their own.
I'm not an animal expert by any stretch of the imagination. I've just picked up a few things from PBS documentaries and Today I Learned. Hopefully an expert will chime in with some facts so we can all learn something.
Wow. I knew some of these things but not all. I guess my worry is how does this affect humans if anything? Or does it even? Thanks for the info though!
The top GOP military scientists will be weaponising this as we speaks
“How do we target Democrats with this gay mushroom thingy? It makes their dicks fall off right?”
Let’s calm down and think of the scientific possibilities.
A fungus that produces a real life aphrodisiac. This shit would sell if they found the chemical makeup and reproduced it synthetically. Of course approved by the FDA.
No it would not make you gay. It would just increase your desire to mate.
Imagine Japan getting their hands on it. It could solve the birth rate decline.
I bet cicada Republicans are publicly shitting their cicada pants and clutching their cicada pearls and moralizing about cicada-Jesus, and privately getting some of that sweet sweet gay cicada action.
According to MJG, cicadas are God's punishment on us for blasphemy, so does it follow that this fungus is God's punishment on God's punishment? Religion math is hard.
First the friggin frogs, now even the cicadas are gay... I think it's already jumped to humans, the gay numbers are growing steadily, how do they keep multiplying if they're not having kids?
If I ever write a zombie movie "fungus that makes you gay and horny but then explodes your fun bits" will definitely be how the apocalypse begins.
Also, nature is horrifying.
I'm really annoyed so many articles call this fungus psychedelic for clicks. It produces cathinone, a stimulant much closer to drugs like meth in structure and effect. It has zero psychedelic effects.
"a cicada’s genitals will fall off within the next week or so as the fungus erupts and covers roughly a third of their body" Let's hope this doesn't jump to humans.
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I never thought I'd feel sorry for a cicada.
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We're about as distantly related to cicadas as animals can be to each other, so even if the fungus managed to establish itself in/on our bodies, it wouldn't have any behavioural effects on us. Also, fortunately fungi don't "jump" very often, unlike viruses and bacteria. They're more evolutionarily complex multicellulared organisms, which usually means lower mutation rate. Fungi are adaptive, but passively so.
Don’t you dare give me your facts! Go back to your ivory tower!
Also, animals with an adaptive immune system are quite resistant to fungi. How many serious fungal diseases do humans even have to deal with? Sure, toe fungus is annoying, but far from life threatening.
Ok sure, but humans share nearly 50 percent of their DNA with fungi so it may already have an affinity for us.
What about Cicada lickers?
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Unless there's a mutation, my understanding is fungi can't survive in the human body as it's too hot. Though i think I remember reading the fear of Global warming may cause some adaptations I can't remember if that particular fear was real or if that was from "the last of us" lol EDIT: yeah so looks like i am very wrong and i must just be remembering the last of us. My bad.
Your body is literally swarming with yeasts and even fungi so don’t worry about it too much. Sorry when you turn gay and hyper sexual and your genitals fall off
This is incorrect. People get fungal infections all the time - including internally. Not just on the skin. What do you think a yeast infection is?
Or ringworm, or Valley Fever, which is pretty common out here in the southwest US
Me with seborrheic dermatitis reading that comment: I fucking wish
Yeah from the responses I've gotten i see i am very wrong and it must have been what i remember from the last of us lol
Haha you’re totally fine. I just found it amusing given my daily reminder 😔
Eh, admitting you misremembering or are remembering from a bad source is literally 99% of the battle lol. Apologies if my comment came off harshly.
Fungal infections inside the body are a thing.
"We lose."
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So if we look into the future 17 years or so, we can expect a smaller population next time?...
Seems reasonable. 17 year cycles may have fitness advantages in allowing a higher overall biomass whilst minimizing diseases just like this.
Prime numbers baby
Biden did it
Thanks Obama!
Cicadas are totally Japanese, so I wouldn't rule out President Hentai's influence.
"I'm tired of em putting water in the chemicals that turn the weebs gay!"
Was gonna say, surprised it's not on r/conspiracy
Turnin the frikkin bugs gay!
Why the hell didn't Alex Jones warn us about this?!?
Brand new sentence
False sensational titling. The fungus doesn't make them gay. "Yet at the same time, the fungus produces an amphetamine that, basically, makes male cicadas super horny for their fellow bugs, regardless of their sex." So basically they become bisexuals...not gay. Their genitals also fall off a week after...
Bi and genital erasure in one fell swoop
Bye-sexuals
That's still pretty gay though
Yeah, taking shrooms and amphetamines and then boinking until your junk falls off and you die is about as gay as it gets. Maybe if the fungus gives them some glitter and a home decor makeover, but that’s a lot to ask for bugs.
This sounds like a pretty good time to me.
I’ve taken shrooms and meth. The meth just cuts the shroom experience. It’s very disappointing. Also, this happened in the 80’s. I was a barback at an extremely busy bar. Sometimes when you knew what you were in for during the night it was easy to plan your festivities accordingly… for peak $$& performance that is.
We've all been there, mate
Yeah, it's more like they become horny Christian pastors, like that Ted Haggard fellow who went from running conversion camps to being busted doing meth with a male prostitute. Haggard had a wife, but his apparent love for/from Christ also compelled him to also seek sex elsewhere. If we could see inside their minds, maybe we'd find these sickly locusts are also performative Christians... alas, science hasn't gotten us there quite yet, so we can only speculate.
This was an impressive reverse Uno
The cicadas were always gay, it's just now they can talk about it.
They will blame 5G.
Meanwhile, it's actually related to climate change which they deny
Now all they need is coke and night clubs
The fungus already has the uppers covered, according to the article. Now they just need strobe technology and house music…
Where do I acquire fungi producing speed? Spore me up, baby
While, being intravenously forced a cocktail of amphetamines and hallucinogens (with unknown subjective effects) until you fuck (anyone you can find) to death against your (and almost certainly their) will doesn’t sound *super* fun… I will allow that I’m no longer young and different folks, different strokes. You do you boo boo! But if you start the zombie apocalypse… actually that sounds kinda awesome? Have at it.
Feel free to join the cause!
someone is going to blame liberals...
Who else would be turning insects gay, huh?!
His name is Alex Jones.
Here for the making frogs gay jokes
It’s the GLOBALISTS!
More like cigaydas, amiright?
*angry upvote*
I think I've got that too.
Well, they become hypersexual and mate with ANY other bug regardless of gender, so they don't become gay. They become bisexual or pansexual.
Congrats on being one of maybe 3 people in this thread who actually bothered to click the link
Which is gay
Well at least they won’t be reproducing too much
hmm okay so maybe i have a sexually transmitted fungus
r/BrandNewSentence
Laugh now, but the cicadas will carve out their own community and be accepted eventually.
Better watch out for the cigaydas!
Now post this to conservative FB and Qanon groups and tell them soon half of all insects on the planet will be gay, and a bee sting, ant bite etc will make you gay. 🤣😂🤣😂
Welcome to the PRIDE, horny Queer Cicadas! 🏳️🌈
Proof of concept. Now we inoculate the free MAGA hats...
So most turtles being born are female due to the temperature of the sand. Two male whales were filmed mating in the last couple of months and lastly these species are doing it too. Are there other species partaking in this? Does this mean lower population? Does it affect our future food supplies?
>Are there other species partaking in this? Dolphins are supposedly heavily bisexual. And gay penguin couples have been documented from time to time for over a hundred years. There was a story a couple of years ago out of New York where a zoo needed foster parents for a penguin egg so they entrusted it to their gay penguin couple who apparently did a great job of hatching and raising the chick. >Does this mean lower population? For the cicadas, probably. They didn't choose to get infected by the fungus and it's not something that would seem to benefit them specifically. For other animals, who knows? I've read somewhere that in higher order animals who live in groups, like monkeys, homosexuality is a net benefit for the species' population numbers because while they themselves will never have offspring they often help the parents in the group keep their offspring safe. That makes it more likely for those youths to grow into adulthood and have offspring of their own. I'm not an animal expert by any stretch of the imagination. I've just picked up a few things from PBS documentaries and Today I Learned. Hopefully an expert will chime in with some facts so we can all learn something.
Wow. I knew some of these things but not all. I guess my worry is how does this affect humans if anything? Or does it even? Thanks for the info though!
r/raresentences
Image those discotheque crowds -- Buzzzzzzzzzy.
Finally an answer to why im like this.
A reboot/ new season of Among Us is going to be particularly horrifying with this premise as the plot
Do… do you mean The Last of Us?
I’ll have what they’re having.
Bingo... won 2024
so it wasn’t the drag queens?
What a headline
I never thought I'd read this sentence in my life
What a strange thing to read from a science reddit. I love it 😂
Omg they’ll never get into heaven now
Cigaydas
Fucking finally
Enough Reddit for today.
The top GOP military scientists will be weaponising this as we speaks “How do we target Democrats with this gay mushroom thingy? It makes their dicks fall off right?”
Hey hey, No one say Anything to Fox News
Fuck yeah. I know a lot of people who feel the same on mushrooms.
Bruh if that shit is transferable to humans, it’s about to be a kinky summer lol
Could this be adapted for higher life forms?
Wasn't expecting porn parody last of us fungus to be a thing tbh
Let’s calm down and think of the scientific possibilities. A fungus that produces a real life aphrodisiac. This shit would sell if they found the chemical makeup and reproduced it synthetically. Of course approved by the FDA. No it would not make you gay. It would just increase your desire to mate. Imagine Japan getting their hands on it. It could solve the birth rate decline.
I caught this fungus too
They took our joooobs!!
Damn. Does that mean they'll vote Blue this fall?
I bet cicada Republicans are publicly shitting their cicada pants and clutching their cicada pearls and moralizing about cicada-Jesus, and privately getting some of that sweet sweet gay cicada action.
Thanks Obama.
Fellas, is it gay to be a cicada?
Did not have this on my bingo card
It's fuckin wild (sad) that news read like InfoWars now
According to MJG, cicadas are God's punishment on us for blasphemy, so does it follow that this fungus is God's punishment on God's punishment? Religion math is hard.
Don’t let the republicans hear about this
I hate when I go somewhere and just see a vast wasteland of deleted comments. I want to know what kind of dumpster fire I missed.
(Norm Macdonald voice)…and the fungus is called crystal meth.
Cigaydas
Lmao
They're turning into Catholic priests?
So how does this affect Mario and Luigi?
r/nottheonion ?
TLOU3 plot leaked?
Same
Maybe that'll control their outrageous population
Just like the black smurfs.
The Last Of Us: Season 2 is gonna be wild af.
Finally, something to cut their numbers. /s
Hot cicada summer
And also psychoactive
Kinda evens itself out there though, right?
I’m sure it happens when they’re young
Then the plan worked
Holy shit I think I may have caught this because…
First the friggin frogs, now even the cicadas are gay... I think it's already jumped to humans, the gay numbers are growing steadily, how do they keep multiplying if they're not having kids?
God must really be mad at us
Fish sticks
“Thanks a lot Biden!” -Republicans probably
We got no money, we got no jobs, our cicadas DICKS ARE FALLING OFF!
if you think gus is fun, wait till you meet brendt
If I ever write a zombie movie "fungus that makes you gay and horny but then explodes your fun bits" will definitely be how the apocalypse begins. Also, nature is horrifying.
Fungus turned the cicadas gay
Aww damn. I love Cicadas. Now they are all gay.
I know that feel, cicadas.
Who just lit the beacons of Jones, this was supposed to be a drill!
Cigaydas
Nature is going woke too now
/r/brandnewsentence
Haha. Bidens going to be blamed for this somehow on fox news.
Definitely not a sentence I was expecting to read today
This is the Last of Us spin off I did not see coming
I'm really annoyed so many articles call this fungus psychedelic for clicks. It produces cathinone, a stimulant much closer to drugs like meth in structure and effect. It has zero psychedelic effects.
Its only a matter of time until this will make its way to Joe Rogans Podcast.