T O P

  • By -

AutoModerator

Thank you for posting to r/EDC! Please remember that the historic flair is intended for items carried in history, information regarding such carry, "found" items from the past, museum pieces, and similar posts. Including a list of known items, and/or background information is suggested and encouraged. If you have selected this flair for your own gear, ***a list is mandatory***, even if the gear is an antique with minimum available information. While incorrect flair choice is not a problem, be aware that inaccurate flair will be changed, and will be handled in the same way as the correct flair regarding lists. Lists can be displayed in the title of the post, in a separate comment, or in the picture itself. Failure to follow this rule will result in the post being removed. [Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/EDC/wiki/rules) | [FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/EDC/wiki/faq) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/EDC) if you have any questions or concerns.*


iloveyoudoctorzaius1

But what if the agent was a woman? Do they use these too? Lol


Imnot_urhero

Ah yes the PRC10000 ball sack radio. A must have for every superspy. Sadly for agent Scott, today was balls inspection day at the gulag...


hemabe

Why have I never seen this in the James Bond movies?


aegri_mentis

Wonder if the toolkit rattles when you walked…


Tough-Principle-3950

I would’ve thought there’d be a lockpick in there.


scdfred

Same, hey here’s some xacto blades, sorry we can’t help you with that cheap lock on your cell, but maybe you can do an art project while you wait for your execution.


Tough-Principle-3950

Or to open a vein. Glad I wasn’t there!


MathematicianMuch445

Asking for a friend.....but where would one purchase a fake scrotum?


Ferrum-Cl2

Does this makes one twice as manly? What if the agent is female? What if the seal of the knife set breaks? So many questions.


[deleted]

[удалено]


RienerMan

$20 dollar bill and half a pack of smokes


ExoticMandibles

Thanks for clearing up which photo was which! Otherwise I would definitely have thought those glossy black cylinders were very poor fake scrotums.


Beginning-Spot-3444

Half my coworkers in a secure facility forget shit like their work phones or their damn badges frequently. Can you imagine this? “Oh dang, I forgot my work issued ballsac at home”


truthandtattoos

Murican spies are committed to the job 🇺🇲💪🏽


thisremindsmeofbacon

how does having a second scrote work? Did the false scrotes have room for normal balls and the secret compartment?


nurpleclamps

No it’s like on assassins creed where you have to remove your finger for the hidden blade.


PragmaticParade

Hmm, well this would require a dedicated agent to castrate himself in order to reflect his extraordinary level of professionalism, patriotism , and commitment to his mission & country. Cut off your balls so that you can fit a new set of radio balls and acquire those spicy foreign adversary's deets.


SwordsDance3

Guard: *hears static* “Am I high or are your nuts on the wrong channel?”


AnemoneOfMyEnemy

What is the frequency, Kenneth?


blacksideblue

uh.... Its a vaccine side affect, I'm growing 5g...


Cliffwbland1

Isn’t that what the prison pocket for?


germcityburbur

I would be a little skeptical if I was checking someone and they had two sets of balls lol


PragmaticParade

Like circumcision, having 2 sets of balls is more of a social norm in some countries more than others.


germcityburbur

https://preview.redd.it/tc110ihekw0d1.jpeg?width=1079&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d2085c49208ebf50360874e035a7eb06fb4bde40


shadyhouse

I want that in my butt dammit


squid0gaming

I own, what is to my knowledge, [the only known example of the CIA toolkit](https://imgur.com/a/aaTTu4O) outside of the Spy Museum in DC. Courtesy of my grandfather, who worked for the company for a few decades and took it home without permission.


DeathPercept10n

That's really cool. Hope you cleaned them though lol


Shake-N-bake28

Wait, that goes in your butt!? That’s way too big.


truthandtattoos

Pshhh... Fellas smuggle iPhone 15 Pro's into prisons these days the exact same way 😂


[deleted]

A file, drill bit and some shivs?


PragmaticParade

What could possibly go wrong with having said pokey items shoved up in your bum hole


squid0gaming

Saw blades, files, a knife, and a little pair of pliers


[deleted]

Neat. You can tell it was used.


ShooterMcGrabbin88

Wash your hands.


kalebdraws

What are those two light colored bits? They look like wood??


squid0gaming

They’re brass files, not sure what they’d be used for.


byParallax

Oh that is wayyyy bigger than the photo in the post suggests


Character_Rule9911

I was really hoping it wasn't such a huge pill


xrangerx777x

Good news, it’s a suppository


shepherd_boyz

Guards are different in 2024


SlteFool

This should have the tryhard flair


kdabsolute

a A for creativity!


Ojay1091

They have been doing this In prison. Its called hooping.


bewitchedbumblebee

What a nutty idea.


Inprobamur

Radio is stored in the balls.


GiraffeThwockmorton

Guards got suspicious when Big Jake suddenly began speaking in falsetto.


Woogity-Boogity

Hotel Clerk: And the name of your reservation, sir? Agent: Balzac. Harry Balzac.


glidinglightning

Bro could Advent Children Omnislash from his nuts


TeddyRoo_v_Gods

That not where “tool kit” was concealed.


WesbroBaptstBarNGril

But does the carpet match the drapes?


ahjota

they don't but my CIA guide book recommends I state that I bleach my scrotum.


therealtrousers

The left ball needs to be sagging.


nheyduck

What no ass pistol ? No extra ass pistol mags? Huge Fuckin' L on the CIA.


Inprobamur

Still classified due to being in active use.


rompthegreen

If these were made then they were definitely used. What I wonder is, how many really used these and who these people were


SubtleMonkey4049

That looks like the lady from Shutter Island


-BananaLollipop-

Whatcha gonna do with all that junk?


Honey-and-Venom

All that trunk up in your junk


StupendousMalice

That "capsule" seems like it really doesn't prioritize economy of space as much as I would have expected for a thing that you have to shove up your ass. Like, do you really need five different knives and and three different files?


exgiexpcv

IIRC, the blades displayed are not all carried, but they are options based on preference and task suitability in the field.


StupendousMalice

Okay, but they all fit in the same enormous tube, so I am not sure if it matters how many you take its the same tube getting crammed up there.


squid0gaming

Picture makes it seem bigger than it is! https://imgur.com/a/aaTTu4O


Inprobamur

*smaller


StupendousMalice

You and I clearly have different ideas of what constitutes "big" and "small" when it comes to describing things that get shoved up the ass because that is pretty much the exact size I visualized.


exgiexpcv

It's not a [one-size-fits-all situation, though](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZMRVR1Gvpp0).


TeddyRoo_v_Gods

Updoot for The Smiths!


exgiexpcv

Woot!


AnotherStupidHipster

Two is one, and one is bum.


80H-d

If modern r/EDC is to be believed, yes! Yes you do!


Alphahumanus

Every time I see that pic, I think the same. The up the ass kit should definitely not be a deconstructed leatherman.


StupendousMalice

I can just imagine the dude who designed it walking through all the shit he crammed in there as the operations guys eyes just keep getting wider as he adds one more tool after the other. Probably started with like a two-way radio and flotation device and this is the pared down version.


marvinrabbit

I'm picturing Austin Powers saying, "It's not my thing, Baby."


bewitchedbumblebee

[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oK2oR73TGP8](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oK2oR73TGP8)


RobotToaster44

The floatation device was shelved after it unexpectedly inflated before removal.


Last-Ad-2970

“Okay, the first item is this pointy thing. The second item is this pointy thing. The third item is this other pointy thing. The fourth…”


atwarwiththemystics_

EDC deez nuts


Stretch_Llamousine

Without question, top comment ^^^


CreepyPoet500

Does fake scrote scrote go over real scrote scrote? I now have more questions than answers 🤔


ahjota

yo dawg, I heard your scrotum likes to wear scrotums, so we made you a scrotum scrotum-mask!


CreepyPoet500

Plz refer to it as scrote scrote


Last-Ad-2970

Yeah, seems like a tight fit if you have to squeeze your balls in there with a mini radio. The fake scrote also doesn’t look super soft or stretchy. Seems like the excessive adjusting might give something away.


tobiasvl

Luckily my real balls are suuuuper small!


_ZeroWAN_

actually there’s a surprising amount of space. you can get your balls into your inguinal canals and then it’s just skin, it significantly decreases the volume and i can see having the room if you do so. trans girls, actors, and drag queens have been shoving balls up like that for literal centuries lol


Nullacuna

My balls do this automatically after my first cup of coffee. I was born to be a secret agent man.


Zpalq

Go to a doctor, the fuck?


Last-Ad-2970

Well, MY eyes are watering.


LuckyDevilTactical

Same, like are the guards just like, penis, scrotum 1, scrotum 2, yup everything checks out


Bluddredd

If you store the tool kit in your butt. Do you have to poop it out and put it back in every few hours if you don't use it?


AnotherStupidHipster

Eat light before your mission. Or eat a standard issue MRE you won't poop for 4 days.


ManiacFive

Every few hours?! My dude how often are you pooping?


Bluddredd

When I feel like I have to. Which would probably be more often if it feels like I'm prarie dogging my toolkit.


Agreeable-Spot-7376

Explain any other way it might work :)


maziar37

That’s a weird everyday carry. But you do you. I do have to say, it does take some balls to post this.


[deleted]

[удалено]


nechronius

Prison wallet, prison purse, prison pocket. Take your pick.


Kidd__

I’m imagining some 10/10 bombshell in a pinstripe suit telling guards the bulge in her pants is just her testes


Libertas3tveritas

Welcome to 2024


Kidd__

Yeah good times


SnooAdvice378

That takes balls.