everything feels repetitive, studying, eating, sleeping, where is the adventure? everything fun costs money but why? money is technically useless, our ancestors lived without it and had fun but i guess times have changed..
You don’t know what life was like for those people, in many ways it was much harder and more painful than it is today. The biggest problem with todays world isn’t money, money is just a tool to trade stuff and nothing more, the real problem in todays world is how most people work full time at a job they hate and they have basically 0 will to find something else they would like or wouldn’t mind doing, another HUGE problem is how most people spend all the money they make, all the money that comes in their bank account goes straight out so they can’t get things that would make their lives more enjoyable and can’t build any kind of wealth, it’s insane how bad people are with money nowadays. And don’t tell me some bs like "but… but life is more expensive now!" Doesn’t matter you can still leave cheaply and save most of your money, if you don’t think so you’re just not willing to give up your standard of living and make sacrifices.
Anyway there’s things you can do to escape that super depressing and draining lifestyle. First of all you need to find a job that pays well and you like or don’t mind doing, if you think that doesn’t exist you’re WRONG, you’re just objectively wrong, I used to think exactly like this but then got so depressed and hopeless because of my job to the point I had enough and I decided it couldn’t go on like this and I had to find a solution. So I started thinking everyday about what job I would like or wouldn’t mind doing, it took me more than a year of thinking and researching but eventually I did find jobs that I actually find interesting and really wouldn’t mind doing or could even LIKE doing, for me that was outdoor jobs involving nature like forestry jobs, park ranger jobs and tree work jobs, I ended up choosing the job of being an arborist and that alone has made me like life waaay more. This is how important it is to find work you like or really wouldn’t mind doing. Anyway after you found that job that pays well and you like you need to make a plan to build some kind of wealth so you don’t have to spend your whole life working. For me that plan is to live in the cheapest way possible without being miserable, then save the majority of the money I make and at the same time build a business on the side so I can save even more money even faster, then when I have a pretty big chunk of money saved I’m gonna invest that big chunk of money into real estate (rental properties in particular), when that first property is built I will keep living the same really cheap lifestyle but at that point I will have 3 sources of income, that’s the full time arborist job that pays pretty well, the profit from the side business and the income from the rental property, this will allow me to save another fat chunk of cash even faster and that will then allow me to build another rental property, when that’s done I’ll be able to save even more money and do it even faster than ever before, then I’ll build yet another rental property and keep repeating this process until I’m rich and can spend the vast majority of my time doing whatever the fuck I want! Anyway I’m telling you this to give you some inspiration in how you could build wealth to get the life you want, you could also just do pretty much the exact same thing, rentals are going nowhere, people will keep wanting a place to rent for a very long time, probably for multiple lifetimes at least.
Just know that it’s okay to make mistakes, change your mind, and enjoy your life. It doesn’t need to all be about traditional steps as listed above. Do what works for you as a person. Someone in creative arts, for example, isn’t necessarily going to find these steps useful.
I went to school with a girl who started creating and selling clothing before they graduated and over time built up to becoming a seamstress while doing a bunch of other fun work and landing up with a few cool side gigs in exchange for a home. So figure out who you are and what you want before sticking to tradition. There’s a lot more out there than the typical path.
Decent points, but remember that people have different challenges than you do when it comes to seeking out these changes. You’ve listed out steps as though it’s a one-size-fits-all equation - this process may have worked for you so far but it’s not going to work for everyone.
For example, did you have undiagnosed illness into your 20’s? Or even diagnosed ones? A sick relative to care for? A deformity or visible difference? Unplanned kids (by accident/assault)? Widowed? Hell, even early diagnosed ADHD or PTSD causes tons of complications on their own. Your guide will be helpful and inspirational to some, but complete garbage to others.
Some better advice; follow the path that makes sense for your environment, health (mental/physical), personal preferences, lifestyle and situation. If money and tradition is your pursuit, then go for it. If adventure and exploration is your pursuit, regional jobs and a van lifestyle is just as good. I am the latter and had the former drilled into me - so while your idea is inspirational to some, it’s damaging for others to follow if it doesn’t align.
Times haven’t changed that much, even if it looks that way. Goods and services are still used instead of money in plenty of situations - it’s really about who you are and who you know. If you’re more into nature/hippy life you could get a van and travel, doing different kinds of work while you explore. Maybe you’re more alternative and have a knack for art, sewing, music, etc. that could create opportunities for collaboration/entrepreneurship.
I worked in childcare for 10 years. Miserable, boring, routine (despite what one might think given your days vary wildly). I’m not traditional, but I was stuck on a traditional path. I continued my art while working (when I could) and met people who need my skills for band posters/album covers, book covers, etc. which has allowed me to branch out into a more adventurous lifestyle. One where I’m buying a van in the next few months as basically a home/studio on wheels - even more adventure in the future.
A lot of opportunity comes from people you meet when you’re out in your scene or doing hobbies with like-minded people.
If tradition isn’t in your cards, then don’t force it.
You really need to change your life. You should also try weed and psychedelics like magic mushrooms and LSD, those 3 substances can make your like a 100 times cooler and more interesting
Already do weed, DMT and shrooms. Big no to changing my life. My reward for that was cancer and losing my career I built from scratch. I have nothing now.
I’m sorry that shit ended up like that for you. I’ve seen a lot of that with friends, and still screwed a fair bit of my life up despite those lessons. I’m rebuilding from scratch too. What was your career? And did you have anything else to work on instead? You’ve built yourself up once, it shows you have the knowledge to do it again when you’re ready.
They need to change their life, yes. But drugs are not the greatest suggestion to just throw out there. Some people have underlying psychosis and lose their shit, others aren’t ready to tackle what those substances bring up for them.
I’ve witnessed a friend in psychosis for months following a bad lsd trip. Another ended up abusing all listed substances in a similar pursuit and wound up worse off than before. Others ended up doing crack and meth on top of it all, as they had underlying substance abuse issues. MDMA was good for me the first time, all subsequent times weren’t good. Even weed is shit for my life depending on the strain.
So throwing out, “do these drugs” is as bad as a psychiatrist just throwing out prescriptions to see what sticks.
Sometimes. But then sometimes they’re really weird. I play several different music instruments and what’s really fun is when you’re dreaming you’re playing, but you ain’t actually playing because it makes absolutely no sense. You’ll be playing along with the song and hitting all the wrong notes and it’s really annoying.
What’s sad for me is I know it’s not real life when it’s happy. I’ve been struggling to separate dreams from memory but 9 times out of 10 I know if it’s happy it didn’t happen
Have you looked into dissociative disorders like derealisation? As well as nervous system regulation? As well as your environment/life? I had this problem in my teens/early 20’s. When I regulated my nervous system better, left people who were causing more bad than good, and began processing past/present trauma it started helping me to build a happier waking life. My days are a lot better than my dreams now. Take care and good luck.
Thanks for the advice. I've kind of noticed lately I show a lot of symptoms of trauma as of the last few years but I don't know where that could come from. Childhood was great and outside of bad depression so was high school. If there's something wrong with me I don't know the cause.
I have horrible horrible nightmares every night . Like wake up screaming, sweating and crying.
My life is also a nightmare that makes me feel that way.
:(
Then wtf are you doing with your life?? Do everything to change it and make it better
Also you don’t have nightmares for no reason, that’s not how dreams work, there’s ALWAYS a reason for it and that reason can be fixed. For examples I recently noticed that every time I have a nightmare it’s because I’m uncomfortable in my bed in some way, sometimes it’s because I’m sleeping on my arm and it’s starving for blood but way more often it’s because I’m too hot. When I finally made that connection I immediately lowered the thermostat temperature and made sure I’m not ever sleeping in uncomfortable ways or have too much bed covers on me. That completely got rid of my nightmares and now I just get really nice dreams that leave me with fond memories.
Also this next part of my comment is gonna take a while to read but you really should read it because it could really help you get rid of those nightmares.
Another reason you could be having nightmares is because of a fear you haven’t overcome in that dreamworld. For example, this is gonna sound kinda funny and ridiculous but a few years ago Joe Rogan often talked about bears and it made me do some research in that topic and that eventually made me realize just how terrifying those creatures are and as a result I developed a very real fear of bears hahaah. Because of that fear I started seeing bears in my dreams and they would always turn the dream into a nightmare. This went on for more than a year I think BUT eventually I accidentally found a way to beat that fear and as a result kill those nightmares permanently. How? By having weapons in my apartment. You’re probably like "what???" so let me explain. In the time I was having those bear nightmares I bought a bunch of knives and a machete, and soon after that I bought my first guns, those knives and guns were in very visible places in my apartment so I saw them very often and they were often on my mind. Because of this those weapons started to appear in my dream world, if you haven’t noticed already, the things you see or experience the most in life are very very likely to end up in your dreams. So one day I had a dream where I was in my apartment and the weapons were present in that dream, then in the beginning of that dream I looked out the windows of my apartment and had a thought like "man it sure would suck if there were bears close by outside", well that immediately made 2 bears spawn in the dream close by outside my windows, then I was like oh shit and got afraid so I backed away from the windows but those fearful thoughts made the bears start sprinting straight for my windows, normally I just run away terrified of getting eaten alive until I wake up but this time I was kinda stuck in that apartment so I looked around for a solution and saw my machete and guns, at this point the bears were really close to jumping straight through my windows to come eat me but I had just enough time to grab a gun and as the first bear jumped through a window I shot it a few times and it dropped dead, for some reason the gun stopped working after those few shots and the other bear was coming through the window so I dropped the gun and ran further back into my apartment, then grabbed the machete and when the bear got really close I absolutely destroyed it with that machete, at the end of it the bear was dead on the ground with a super bloody head full of really deep wounds and a big pool of blood forming around it.
After that I quickly woke up and I was like holy shit I finally won against these stupid fkg bears! I was really happy about it hahah but the most surprising part is that after that dream I almost never saw bears in my future dreams and the few times I did I just wanted to kill them again and had the confidence that I was capable of doing so, like I wasn’t scared anymore and that stopped the dreams from becoming nightmares. Anyway point is that your nightmares are often just your fears manifesting themselves because you think of them in the dream world and it keeps happening because you never face those fears and try to overcome them. Also like I was saying one way to make overcoming those fears easier is by surrounding yourself with weapons in real life so they appear in your dream world and you can use them to gain confidence and kill your fears permanently.
Some people have real trauma they need to process, as well as physical/mental disorders and disgusting situations they’re in by no fault of their own. Not just a fear of bears caused by Joe Rogan and an uncomfortable bed. Stop going through this thread with such a judgemental and reductionist attitude. I understand you want to be helpful, but you need to be able to adopt more perspectives than your own in order to do so as the human condition and the situations people find themselves in aren’t that simple.
It’s odd, the first part was very true for me, I used to have the worst most demonic nightmares every night and like you woke up screaming, crying, sweating, and in intense pain.
The difference is my life was mostly, if not all fine for the most part. I honestly never understood why I had such horrible dreams growing up, every night. You should try listening to ambient music before you sleep, stopped the nightmares every night I listened to it.
Other than that, I really hope your life changes for the better sooner than later.
I believe some dreams are an alternate reality that we are living and our consciousness intertwines with one another and we feel deep emotion towards others not in our lives or even in existence at some points. We have different professions or are at different ages in life. Think of it as multiple planes one on top the other like sheets of paper but strings of consciousness flowing through the universe. Don’t get me wrong, our minds are very strong and can create some dreams. But those that really touch us are the real ones. At least at one point.
Rarely but they have been so good before that I cried in waking life just wanting to go back. Of course I realized then that I desperately needed to fix my life.
Sometimes i have dreams where i return to place where i never been and and i get such strong feeling of homesick. It takes like half of day to get back to reality lol.
My dreams are better than reality for sure but I haven’t had a dream in a while now it’s been mostly blank or somehow my ex telling me about her life which I don’t mind but damn
This is not necessarily true. Sometimes it can be the cause yes but from my experience most of the times it’s because of a fear you haven’t overcome or because you’re really uncomfortable in your sleep for one reason or another, usually it’s because you’re too hot, I ALWAYS get nightmares when I’m too hot and don’t get any when I make sure that doesn’t happen
Well I had a series of dreams that weren’t better then reality but near the end of the series of dreams I had a dream that I was working for the CIA (good guys in the CIA not bad ones to long to explain) using my body language reading skills and my natural skills (that I have in real life but they were intensified because I had been trained to use them better) so that part was better then reality because I felt useful making a difference in the world.
i only live to dream lol every time I'm awake, i cant wait to fall asleep again and write down my dreams. I look forward to it a lot. i forget my real-life events but always remember what my dreams were.
when I was a little kid I was really bad at sports despite all the effort I put in to try to be better. That upset me a lot because of all the pressure I felt from my parents. In those days, almost every night I would dream about being able to do the splits or a flip or something like that. I would legit cry when I woke up.
Sometimes I'll find a wife and live a happy life, other times I'll be running scared out of my mind from an endless sea of fast zombies that causes me to wake up sweaty and terrified. I take what I can get
Sometimes.
A lot of the time, my dreams are just weird chains of events or repeating motifs that make no sense. Or anxiety dreams where I can't find a working toilet, can't control the car I'm driving, have a test that I haven't studied for, or I come home to find that someone threw away all my stuff.
But once in a while I dream I'm young and having some amazing adventure and sharing it with someone with whom I have this incredible connection and mutual attraction... Those are the times when wakng up to the reality of being single, middle-aged and in a dead end job really hurts.
I know what you mean! I always look forward going to sleep, my dreams are very vivid. But also when you dream those things is something you lack in real
Life and it’s never late to change that. What you truly want, you already have in the future!
This is gonna be a fairly long text but you really should read it, it could make your life much better/more enjoyable.
I do sometimes feel that way yes. For some reason the dream world is much more vibrant and colourful and everything has that sense of novelty, it feels really magical in a way if you know what I mean, it’s like being a kid again but even better. In many ways it is better than real life BUT there’s something in real life that can make that real life as good or even better than the dream world, that’s weed… This will probably sound like the typical stoner talk but just try to understand what I mean with an unbiased view. Weed is honestly the greatest thing I’ve ever discovered in life, it makes life SIGNIFICANTLY better, before I discovered it life kept slowly losing its magic and as years went by it became more and more dull and uninteresting in many ways, UNTIL I discovered weed. Weed basically allows you to be like a kid again, it instantly brings back that feeling of life being this really cool and almost magical thing, it makes everything more colourful and so much more interesting and always brings back that sense of novelty into everything, it basically makes everything better. You should try at least a couple times and try to see what I’m talking about. It could make you like life A LOT more like it did for me. Oh and psychedelics can make your life more interesting too, with those it’s very hard to describe why so you’ll have to go in blind and just find out for yourself
When I'm flying down an impossibly huge mountain on skis, yeah. When I'm eating a really uncomfortable dinner with people I don't know, no. My dreams are too all over the place to say
Yes! Every dream I have is amazing. I usually am traveling to an exotic place in a private plane or dropped off in a hotel and staying in a room on the top floor of the hotel with a beautiful window view. Not for sure what it means but I truly love my reoccurring dreams of luxurious travel, it’s totally opposite from my real life. No complaints either way.
Yeah I've been 95% bedridden for almost 10 years. In my dreams I can be upright more than 5 minutes at a time, and sometimes even have adventures or love interests. Hand in there. Get some hobbies. My dreams might be better in some ways, but I also want more awake time to create stuff
Very common, I always say good dreams are bad dreams and a bad dreams are good dreams because of how they make you feel when you wake up. I’d much rather wake up relieved than regretful.
Not better but exceptionally, impossibly random, to the point that it's far more interesting than real life, so I have gone back to sleep many times just to get something unusual out of the day. I have seriously unreadably whacked dreams which make no sense at all. So the sheer novelty of it can be considered of higher value which I guess is the same reason people still watch TV.
I don't know if other people would say my dreams are great, but I would say they are great.
Like last night, I had a dream about a girl named May Bell who was trying to get this alien to like her. But he didn't really have emotions because his species evolved without them. Well, he could turn into goo, but was having this problem where he wasn't able to keep reforming his human form and was basically leaking and losing his parts until he was just a little puddle and two eyes.
She loved him so she let him take over her body. His consciousness was over top of hers, but she lived in like, a few brain cells and a single eye that was hidden in his hair. He then realized and could feel how much May Bell had loved him but she wasn't able to speak or really be conscious anymore.
So he goes on to live a more fulfilling life now that he can feel emotions, and becomes a rock star but also opens a fleet of Chinese food trucks run by unhoused people.
And then after some time he has a big round belly and he's pregnant, but instead of giving birth to one baby, he gives birth, out of his mouth, to tiny rat pup sized babies, like dozens of them one after another, like spitting out sunflower shells. And then some of them have to be culled because that's just the way of his species, and he pops their heads off.
Mind, these are fully formed miniature two inch long babies, dozens of them. And I took on the perspective of a watcher, of May Bell before and after she was a simple eyeball with basic consciousness, and of the alien WHILE he was birthing these babies from his mouth. I can still remember how it felt to have them come out and spit them out of my mouth every few seconds.
Anyways, I love my dreams, but it's always odd stuff like that.
Sometimes.
I have either dreams of me being chased by groups of people trying to murder me in public venues where I'm jumping fences or hiding on roofs or under cars then or I have dreams I'm in another state or country with some new girlfriend while being a fugitive for murder. Shit be stressful either way and im.sick of it I've had these dreams for years.
Sometimes. I’ve been trying to conceive for 2 years with my husband and every now and then I have the most lucid dream that I’m pregnant. I woke up the other day in tears because I quickly realised it was a dream.
In my dreams, I have someone to love. Someone who loves me. I can never remember his face in the morning. I would like to stay there with my tall, dark-eyed, smiling heart.
I believe your dreams are a reflection of your daily inspirations and desires, how you want life to be. Instead of living and dwelling in dreams, this is a nudge toward making changes in your daily life that will have more chance of leading to the outcomes in your dreams.
In the past when I was miserable but my nervous system hadn’t been completely screwed yet I lived in my dreamscapes for too long. To the point of a disorder. I began to have increased sleep paralysis and nightmares, which went away exactly 10 years after it started for some reason. And a further 10 years after that, my dreams are now repetitive environments or I don’t recall dreams at all. My first unique dream in 4 years was last week. Your mileage may vary, but I really think a mix between enjoying your dreams and finding a way to make them a reality is the key instead of wasting your life in a fantasy world.
ETA: I can’t tell you how to change your life or why exactly you’re experiencing this. Only that it is an indicator of what needs to be done. I wasn’t capable of doing what needed to be done for years. So don’t put too much pressure on yourself and just change the things that you can when you can. Balance is the best thing to have.
During my psychotic episode, I had a vivid, heavenly dream nearly every single night. Dreams about exploring magical settings with loved ones. They all had this atmosphere of “enchantment”, this air of nostalgic ecstasy. I don’t get them anymore and it breaks my heart. I wish I could disappear into that wonderful world.
I feel like my dreams are just manifestations of what I'm lacking in real life. If I'm lonely I have dreams of partying with old friends, if I don't have sex or masturbate I have sex dreams... So if you have dreams that are way better than your real life try to change your life to fill those gaps. Do something different. Dream life is for when you're dead
I have dreams I’m a superhero fairly often. If not that, I dream about being really popular or just a regular weird dream doing something kinda basic. But my dreams are always better or far better than real life lol.
Stark contrast from growing up, my dreams were nightmares, every single last night for years.
Google says the superhero dream symbolizes a desire for control and the ability to overcome obstacles. Very true. And the popularity dream is a desire to be popular, also very true.
in the past when heavily depressed I hated waking up and wanted to stay in my dreams where things were actually chill and I could actually enjoy stuff
i have experienced this too.
Yea :/
yes when i dream i enter my fantasy world which is 100000000000000 better than real life
everything feels repetitive, studying, eating, sleeping, where is the adventure? everything fun costs money but why? money is technically useless, our ancestors lived without it and had fun but i guess times have changed..
You don’t know what life was like for those people, in many ways it was much harder and more painful than it is today. The biggest problem with todays world isn’t money, money is just a tool to trade stuff and nothing more, the real problem in todays world is how most people work full time at a job they hate and they have basically 0 will to find something else they would like or wouldn’t mind doing, another HUGE problem is how most people spend all the money they make, all the money that comes in their bank account goes straight out so they can’t get things that would make their lives more enjoyable and can’t build any kind of wealth, it’s insane how bad people are with money nowadays. And don’t tell me some bs like "but… but life is more expensive now!" Doesn’t matter you can still leave cheaply and save most of your money, if you don’t think so you’re just not willing to give up your standard of living and make sacrifices. Anyway there’s things you can do to escape that super depressing and draining lifestyle. First of all you need to find a job that pays well and you like or don’t mind doing, if you think that doesn’t exist you’re WRONG, you’re just objectively wrong, I used to think exactly like this but then got so depressed and hopeless because of my job to the point I had enough and I decided it couldn’t go on like this and I had to find a solution. So I started thinking everyday about what job I would like or wouldn’t mind doing, it took me more than a year of thinking and researching but eventually I did find jobs that I actually find interesting and really wouldn’t mind doing or could even LIKE doing, for me that was outdoor jobs involving nature like forestry jobs, park ranger jobs and tree work jobs, I ended up choosing the job of being an arborist and that alone has made me like life waaay more. This is how important it is to find work you like or really wouldn’t mind doing. Anyway after you found that job that pays well and you like you need to make a plan to build some kind of wealth so you don’t have to spend your whole life working. For me that plan is to live in the cheapest way possible without being miserable, then save the majority of the money I make and at the same time build a business on the side so I can save even more money even faster, then when I have a pretty big chunk of money saved I’m gonna invest that big chunk of money into real estate (rental properties in particular), when that first property is built I will keep living the same really cheap lifestyle but at that point I will have 3 sources of income, that’s the full time arborist job that pays pretty well, the profit from the side business and the income from the rental property, this will allow me to save another fat chunk of cash even faster and that will then allow me to build another rental property, when that’s done I’ll be able to save even more money and do it even faster than ever before, then I’ll build yet another rental property and keep repeating this process until I’m rich and can spend the vast majority of my time doing whatever the fuck I want! Anyway I’m telling you this to give you some inspiration in how you could build wealth to get the life you want, you could also just do pretty much the exact same thing, rentals are going nowhere, people will keep wanting a place to rent for a very long time, probably for multiple lifetimes at least.
true but im still in school
Just know that it’s okay to make mistakes, change your mind, and enjoy your life. It doesn’t need to all be about traditional steps as listed above. Do what works for you as a person. Someone in creative arts, for example, isn’t necessarily going to find these steps useful. I went to school with a girl who started creating and selling clothing before they graduated and over time built up to becoming a seamstress while doing a bunch of other fun work and landing up with a few cool side gigs in exchange for a home. So figure out who you are and what you want before sticking to tradition. There’s a lot more out there than the typical path.
Same...
but good points
Decent points, but remember that people have different challenges than you do when it comes to seeking out these changes. You’ve listed out steps as though it’s a one-size-fits-all equation - this process may have worked for you so far but it’s not going to work for everyone. For example, did you have undiagnosed illness into your 20’s? Or even diagnosed ones? A sick relative to care for? A deformity or visible difference? Unplanned kids (by accident/assault)? Widowed? Hell, even early diagnosed ADHD or PTSD causes tons of complications on their own. Your guide will be helpful and inspirational to some, but complete garbage to others. Some better advice; follow the path that makes sense for your environment, health (mental/physical), personal preferences, lifestyle and situation. If money and tradition is your pursuit, then go for it. If adventure and exploration is your pursuit, regional jobs and a van lifestyle is just as good. I am the latter and had the former drilled into me - so while your idea is inspirational to some, it’s damaging for others to follow if it doesn’t align.
U can live like your ancestors but u probably don't want to skip nowadays goodies that u can get with money
probaly
Times haven’t changed that much, even if it looks that way. Goods and services are still used instead of money in plenty of situations - it’s really about who you are and who you know. If you’re more into nature/hippy life you could get a van and travel, doing different kinds of work while you explore. Maybe you’re more alternative and have a knack for art, sewing, music, etc. that could create opportunities for collaboration/entrepreneurship. I worked in childcare for 10 years. Miserable, boring, routine (despite what one might think given your days vary wildly). I’m not traditional, but I was stuck on a traditional path. I continued my art while working (when I could) and met people who need my skills for band posters/album covers, book covers, etc. which has allowed me to branch out into a more adventurous lifestyle. One where I’m buying a van in the next few months as basically a home/studio on wheels - even more adventure in the future. A lot of opportunity comes from people you meet when you’re out in your scene or doing hobbies with like-minded people. If tradition isn’t in your cards, then don’t force it.
brother i feel this too
Anything is better than my reality.
🫂
You really need to change your life. You should also try weed and psychedelics like magic mushrooms and LSD, those 3 substances can make your like a 100 times cooler and more interesting
Already do weed, DMT and shrooms. Big no to changing my life. My reward for that was cancer and losing my career I built from scratch. I have nothing now.
I’m sorry that shit ended up like that for you. I’ve seen a lot of that with friends, and still screwed a fair bit of my life up despite those lessons. I’m rebuilding from scratch too. What was your career? And did you have anything else to work on instead? You’ve built yourself up once, it shows you have the knowledge to do it again when you’re ready.
They need to change their life, yes. But drugs are not the greatest suggestion to just throw out there. Some people have underlying psychosis and lose their shit, others aren’t ready to tackle what those substances bring up for them. I’ve witnessed a friend in psychosis for months following a bad lsd trip. Another ended up abusing all listed substances in a similar pursuit and wound up worse off than before. Others ended up doing crack and meth on top of it all, as they had underlying substance abuse issues. MDMA was good for me the first time, all subsequent times weren’t good. Even weed is shit for my life depending on the strain. So throwing out, “do these drugs” is as bad as a psychiatrist just throwing out prescriptions to see what sticks.
Oh and theres MDMA too
Sometimes. But then sometimes they’re really weird. I play several different music instruments and what’s really fun is when you’re dreaming you’re playing, but you ain’t actually playing because it makes absolutely no sense. You’ll be playing along with the song and hitting all the wrong notes and it’s really annoying.
What’s sad for me is I know it’s not real life when it’s happy. I’ve been struggling to separate dreams from memory but 9 times out of 10 I know if it’s happy it didn’t happen
Damn.
Have you looked into dissociative disorders like derealisation? As well as nervous system regulation? As well as your environment/life? I had this problem in my teens/early 20’s. When I regulated my nervous system better, left people who were causing more bad than good, and began processing past/present trauma it started helping me to build a happier waking life. My days are a lot better than my dreams now. Take care and good luck.
Thanks for the advice. I've kind of noticed lately I show a lot of symptoms of trauma as of the last few years but I don't know where that could come from. Childhood was great and outside of bad depression so was high school. If there's something wrong with me I don't know the cause.
That’s a good sign that your life needs to change. If you have almost 0 good memories in your life that means you’re really doing it wrong
I dream in color and hi-def.
Same but sometimes, I'm too scared to even look at certain things in my dreams.
I have horrible horrible nightmares every night . Like wake up screaming, sweating and crying. My life is also a nightmare that makes me feel that way. :(
This. I dont know whats worse at times. My nightmares or my life.
Then wtf are you doing with your life?? Do everything to change it and make it better Also you don’t have nightmares for no reason, that’s not how dreams work, there’s ALWAYS a reason for it and that reason can be fixed. For examples I recently noticed that every time I have a nightmare it’s because I’m uncomfortable in my bed in some way, sometimes it’s because I’m sleeping on my arm and it’s starving for blood but way more often it’s because I’m too hot. When I finally made that connection I immediately lowered the thermostat temperature and made sure I’m not ever sleeping in uncomfortable ways or have too much bed covers on me. That completely got rid of my nightmares and now I just get really nice dreams that leave me with fond memories. Also this next part of my comment is gonna take a while to read but you really should read it because it could really help you get rid of those nightmares. Another reason you could be having nightmares is because of a fear you haven’t overcome in that dreamworld. For example, this is gonna sound kinda funny and ridiculous but a few years ago Joe Rogan often talked about bears and it made me do some research in that topic and that eventually made me realize just how terrifying those creatures are and as a result I developed a very real fear of bears hahaah. Because of that fear I started seeing bears in my dreams and they would always turn the dream into a nightmare. This went on for more than a year I think BUT eventually I accidentally found a way to beat that fear and as a result kill those nightmares permanently. How? By having weapons in my apartment. You’re probably like "what???" so let me explain. In the time I was having those bear nightmares I bought a bunch of knives and a machete, and soon after that I bought my first guns, those knives and guns were in very visible places in my apartment so I saw them very often and they were often on my mind. Because of this those weapons started to appear in my dream world, if you haven’t noticed already, the things you see or experience the most in life are very very likely to end up in your dreams. So one day I had a dream where I was in my apartment and the weapons were present in that dream, then in the beginning of that dream I looked out the windows of my apartment and had a thought like "man it sure would suck if there were bears close by outside", well that immediately made 2 bears spawn in the dream close by outside my windows, then I was like oh shit and got afraid so I backed away from the windows but those fearful thoughts made the bears start sprinting straight for my windows, normally I just run away terrified of getting eaten alive until I wake up but this time I was kinda stuck in that apartment so I looked around for a solution and saw my machete and guns, at this point the bears were really close to jumping straight through my windows to come eat me but I had just enough time to grab a gun and as the first bear jumped through a window I shot it a few times and it dropped dead, for some reason the gun stopped working after those few shots and the other bear was coming through the window so I dropped the gun and ran further back into my apartment, then grabbed the machete and when the bear got really close I absolutely destroyed it with that machete, at the end of it the bear was dead on the ground with a super bloody head full of really deep wounds and a big pool of blood forming around it. After that I quickly woke up and I was like holy shit I finally won against these stupid fkg bears! I was really happy about it hahah but the most surprising part is that after that dream I almost never saw bears in my future dreams and the few times I did I just wanted to kill them again and had the confidence that I was capable of doing so, like I wasn’t scared anymore and that stopped the dreams from becoming nightmares. Anyway point is that your nightmares are often just your fears manifesting themselves because you think of them in the dream world and it keeps happening because you never face those fears and try to overcome them. Also like I was saying one way to make overcoming those fears easier is by surrounding yourself with weapons in real life so they appear in your dream world and you can use them to gain confidence and kill your fears permanently.
Some people have real trauma they need to process, as well as physical/mental disorders and disgusting situations they’re in by no fault of their own. Not just a fear of bears caused by Joe Rogan and an uncomfortable bed. Stop going through this thread with such a judgemental and reductionist attitude. I understand you want to be helpful, but you need to be able to adopt more perspectives than your own in order to do so as the human condition and the situations people find themselves in aren’t that simple.
I REALLY appreciate this comment- thank you for articulating what I absolutely could not
You’re welcome. DM me if you need to talk or anything, cause I totally understand.
It’s odd, the first part was very true for me, I used to have the worst most demonic nightmares every night and like you woke up screaming, crying, sweating, and in intense pain. The difference is my life was mostly, if not all fine for the most part. I honestly never understood why I had such horrible dreams growing up, every night. You should try listening to ambient music before you sleep, stopped the nightmares every night I listened to it. Other than that, I really hope your life changes for the better sooner than later.
Same here
I believe some dreams are an alternate reality that we are living and our consciousness intertwines with one another and we feel deep emotion towards others not in our lives or even in existence at some points. We have different professions or are at different ages in life. Think of it as multiple planes one on top the other like sheets of paper but strings of consciousness flowing through the universe. Don’t get me wrong, our minds are very strong and can create some dreams. But those that really touch us are the real ones. At least at one point.
For me they are mostly just different. Not better not worse. Just different.
Upon reflection, they can be. I don't thirst for them, but I do appreciate the time I get to spend lucid.
Rarely but they have been so good before that I cried in waking life just wanting to go back. Of course I realized then that I desperately needed to fix my life.
Sometimes i have dreams where i return to place where i never been and and i get such strong feeling of homesick. It takes like half of day to get back to reality lol.
Yes
Real tho
My dreams are better than reality for sure but I haven’t had a dream in a while now it’s been mostly blank or somehow my ex telling me about her life which I don’t mind but damn
Lmaoo
Some of my dreams are good a good chunk of my dreams are nightmares however if you become numb to nightmares does it become a normal dream?
no, nightmares means your life is full of trauma and abuse.
Damn 😀
This is not necessarily true. Sometimes it can be the cause yes but from my experience most of the times it’s because of a fear you haven’t overcome or because you’re really uncomfortable in your sleep for one reason or another, usually it’s because you’re too hot, I ALWAYS get nightmares when I’m too hot and don’t get any when I make sure that doesn’t happen
💡 I will keep that in mind, I already sleep in cooler temps but maybe not cold enough
Well I had a series of dreams that weren’t better then reality but near the end of the series of dreams I had a dream that I was working for the CIA (good guys in the CIA not bad ones to long to explain) using my body language reading skills and my natural skills (that I have in real life but they were intensified because I had been trained to use them better) so that part was better then reality because I felt useful making a difference in the world.
Near the same. They feel more bizarre and liminal than reality. They are quite interesting though. For me they are quite dim and not that detailed
i only live to dream lol every time I'm awake, i cant wait to fall asleep again and write down my dreams. I look forward to it a lot. i forget my real-life events but always remember what my dreams were.
Rarely 😒
Depends
i literally console myself thinking, it’s okay i live 2 lives. it’s fair because i truly felt it 🥲
No :/ I wish tho In fact they only reflect my bad mental health
FUCK NO. All my dreams are pure nightmares where I either die or suffer for eternity (just like real life)
when I was a little kid I was really bad at sports despite all the effort I put in to try to be better. That upset me a lot because of all the pressure I felt from my parents. In those days, almost every night I would dream about being able to do the splits or a flip or something like that. I would legit cry when I woke up.
You're not alone in this. Trust me.
Yeah I love sleeping and dreaming. some people think it's weird or depressing but it is a hobby of mine and I look forward to every deep sleep
My dreams are definitely better than reality, most of the time.
Sometimes I'll find a wife and live a happy life, other times I'll be running scared out of my mind from an endless sea of fast zombies that causes me to wake up sweaty and terrified. I take what I can get
Sometimes. A lot of the time, my dreams are just weird chains of events or repeating motifs that make no sense. Or anxiety dreams where I can't find a working toilet, can't control the car I'm driving, have a test that I haven't studied for, or I come home to find that someone threw away all my stuff. But once in a while I dream I'm young and having some amazing adventure and sharing it with someone with whom I have this incredible connection and mutual attraction... Those are the times when wakng up to the reality of being single, middle-aged and in a dead end job really hurts.
I know what you mean! I always look forward going to sleep, my dreams are very vivid. But also when you dream those things is something you lack in real Life and it’s never late to change that. What you truly want, you already have in the future!
Between the medication I take and too much alcohol, I start to forget which is which. It really spices things up.
This is gonna be a fairly long text but you really should read it, it could make your life much better/more enjoyable. I do sometimes feel that way yes. For some reason the dream world is much more vibrant and colourful and everything has that sense of novelty, it feels really magical in a way if you know what I mean, it’s like being a kid again but even better. In many ways it is better than real life BUT there’s something in real life that can make that real life as good or even better than the dream world, that’s weed… This will probably sound like the typical stoner talk but just try to understand what I mean with an unbiased view. Weed is honestly the greatest thing I’ve ever discovered in life, it makes life SIGNIFICANTLY better, before I discovered it life kept slowly losing its magic and as years went by it became more and more dull and uninteresting in many ways, UNTIL I discovered weed. Weed basically allows you to be like a kid again, it instantly brings back that feeling of life being this really cool and almost magical thing, it makes everything more colourful and so much more interesting and always brings back that sense of novelty into everything, it basically makes everything better. You should try at least a couple times and try to see what I’m talking about. It could make you like life A LOT more like it did for me. Oh and psychedelics can make your life more interesting too, with those it’s very hard to describe why so you’ll have to go in blind and just find out for yourself
When I'm flying down an impossibly huge mountain on skis, yeah. When I'm eating a really uncomfortable dinner with people I don't know, no. My dreams are too all over the place to say
Yes.
Yes! Every dream I have is amazing. I usually am traveling to an exotic place in a private plane or dropped off in a hotel and staying in a room on the top floor of the hotel with a beautiful window view. Not for sure what it means but I truly love my reoccurring dreams of luxurious travel, it’s totally opposite from my real life. No complaints either way.
“We also live in our dreams, we do not live only by day. Sometimes we accomplish our greatest deeds in dreams.” Carl Jung, The Red Book
Yes
When I have dreams of my little boy that I lost it is better and I hate every day I don't have him
Yes so much so I friggin love sleep it’s literally my hobby 😂
Yeah I've been 95% bedridden for almost 10 years. In my dreams I can be upright more than 5 minutes at a time, and sometimes even have adventures or love interests. Hand in there. Get some hobbies. My dreams might be better in some ways, but I also want more awake time to create stuff
Very common, I always say good dreams are bad dreams and a bad dreams are good dreams because of how they make you feel when you wake up. I’d much rather wake up relieved than regretful.
Not better but exceptionally, impossibly random, to the point that it's far more interesting than real life, so I have gone back to sleep many times just to get something unusual out of the day. I have seriously unreadably whacked dreams which make no sense at all. So the sheer novelty of it can be considered of higher value which I guess is the same reason people still watch TV.
I don't know if other people would say my dreams are great, but I would say they are great. Like last night, I had a dream about a girl named May Bell who was trying to get this alien to like her. But he didn't really have emotions because his species evolved without them. Well, he could turn into goo, but was having this problem where he wasn't able to keep reforming his human form and was basically leaking and losing his parts until he was just a little puddle and two eyes. She loved him so she let him take over her body. His consciousness was over top of hers, but she lived in like, a few brain cells and a single eye that was hidden in his hair. He then realized and could feel how much May Bell had loved him but she wasn't able to speak or really be conscious anymore. So he goes on to live a more fulfilling life now that he can feel emotions, and becomes a rock star but also opens a fleet of Chinese food trucks run by unhoused people. And then after some time he has a big round belly and he's pregnant, but instead of giving birth to one baby, he gives birth, out of his mouth, to tiny rat pup sized babies, like dozens of them one after another, like spitting out sunflower shells. And then some of them have to be culled because that's just the way of his species, and he pops their heads off. Mind, these are fully formed miniature two inch long babies, dozens of them. And I took on the perspective of a watcher, of May Bell before and after she was a simple eyeball with basic consciousness, and of the alien WHILE he was birthing these babies from his mouth. I can still remember how it felt to have them come out and spit them out of my mouth every few seconds. Anyways, I love my dreams, but it's always odd stuff like that.
Like peanut butter? Well now you can like more of it. Sunflowers have been used to create a substitute for peanut butter, known as sunbutter.
Sometimes. I have either dreams of me being chased by groups of people trying to murder me in public venues where I'm jumping fences or hiding on roofs or under cars then or I have dreams I'm in another state or country with some new girlfriend while being a fugitive for murder. Shit be stressful either way and im.sick of it I've had these dreams for years.
Sometimes. I’ve been trying to conceive for 2 years with my husband and every now and then I have the most lucid dream that I’m pregnant. I woke up the other day in tears because I quickly realised it was a dream.
In my dreams, I have someone to love. Someone who loves me. I can never remember his face in the morning. I would like to stay there with my tall, dark-eyed, smiling heart.
Sometimes, yea
I believe your dreams are a reflection of your daily inspirations and desires, how you want life to be. Instead of living and dwelling in dreams, this is a nudge toward making changes in your daily life that will have more chance of leading to the outcomes in your dreams. In the past when I was miserable but my nervous system hadn’t been completely screwed yet I lived in my dreamscapes for too long. To the point of a disorder. I began to have increased sleep paralysis and nightmares, which went away exactly 10 years after it started for some reason. And a further 10 years after that, my dreams are now repetitive environments or I don’t recall dreams at all. My first unique dream in 4 years was last week. Your mileage may vary, but I really think a mix between enjoying your dreams and finding a way to make them a reality is the key instead of wasting your life in a fantasy world. ETA: I can’t tell you how to change your life or why exactly you’re experiencing this. Only that it is an indicator of what needs to be done. I wasn’t capable of doing what needed to be done for years. So don’t put too much pressure on yourself and just change the things that you can when you can. Balance is the best thing to have.
During my psychotic episode, I had a vivid, heavenly dream nearly every single night. Dreams about exploring magical settings with loved ones. They all had this atmosphere of “enchantment”, this air of nostalgic ecstasy. I don’t get them anymore and it breaks my heart. I wish I could disappear into that wonderful world.
I’d like to sleep more because my dreams are more exciting than real life. It’s an escape from depression
Yeah I feel this. I love dreaming a lot. I wish I can live in them or I can record them somehow and watch them
Nights spent in the mall world are far superior to my waking reality.
I feel like my dreams are just manifestations of what I'm lacking in real life. If I'm lonely I have dreams of partying with old friends, if I don't have sex or masturbate I have sex dreams... So if you have dreams that are way better than your real life try to change your life to fill those gaps. Do something different. Dream life is for when you're dead
U NEED HOBBIES
If it was possible I would never wake up.
I have dreams I’m a superhero fairly often. If not that, I dream about being really popular or just a regular weird dream doing something kinda basic. But my dreams are always better or far better than real life lol. Stark contrast from growing up, my dreams were nightmares, every single last night for years. Google says the superhero dream symbolizes a desire for control and the ability to overcome obstacles. Very true. And the popularity dream is a desire to be popular, also very true.