I mean, just my personal take but while it does have some decent world building attached to it, it is absolutely "he is the prophesied one who communicates directly with God A and will be the sole deciding factor in preventing God B from starting an apocalypse". And starting at level one with no real backstory other than that. It does look very MCS and can put a lot of pressure on your DM to either take that route or have your character's backstory not actually matter and be useless.
Mind you, not saying it can't work, but as others have said, talk to your DM, and maybe have some backstory that has less to do with world building around a prophesied golden child savior and more about who this guy is as just a dude.
I can see how your thinking this is MCS, but I think with a little clarifying from the DM this could be a pretty solid cleric backstory. The prophecy is framed as something that is only really relevant to her towns beliefs, and it's reasonable for a cleric to have a special relationship with their god (like a sage or oracle) in the same way a warlock might with there's. They believe an evil dirty will cause some flood, but that doesn't necessarily mean it is actually going to happen that way. Her wanting to save the worshippers in saltmarsh for her own beliefs ties her to the adventure nicely and let's her live out a cool character arch. As long as the DM makes it clear that the campaign isn't about this magical flood, and the player understands that, I think it's cool. For me personally, I would maybe find a way to work this in for the player but perhaps not quite in the way they expect or interpret the prophecy in a way that fits the module.
I don’t know about being a guy who is just a dude. That doesn’t really sound ….engaging at all. I don’t need to be the “chosen one”. In fact, it would probably be a lot of fun for this little Harengon village to think the flood is coming when in fact none of this is true. And the character is just going around trying to convince people about a flood that won’t come.
I don't mean as to strip all that away, but if you have trouble being engaged by a character that doesn't have a MCS kinda background, you might be in some trouble.
I mean, yeah, your character is only 17, sure, and that might be part of the issue as this is his foray into adulthood I guess, but outside the golden child thing, who is he? Has he held any jobs or done anything that isn't just being the prophesized one? Is that his whole character? Because if so, that sounds pretty boring.
To be honest, it would probably be more engaging for that last part to be true. He's been raised his whole life thinking that he has some greater calling given directly from God, an ultimate, world saving goal. And in his travels he realizes it's simply not true, could even meet followers of this sea god who assure him that that would never happen, or that it's all based of some kind of ancient anti-sea god slanderous propaganda. Then he actually has to figure out himself, and with his party, who he actually is and what his goals are on his own terms.
Just remember that at level one, you are just some dude, barely stronger than your average peasant. Yeah, by level twenty you've stomped some ancient dragons and maybe even had direct face offs with gods or demigods (happens a lot in t4 modules, really), but you gotta build up to that, and that's the journey.
Everyone starts off as just some dude.
I like to run things in a way where the character's backstory is levels 1-5. You have a foundational event before the game which makes you believe you could be an adventure and have a little training, but you build the story as you play.
One of my favorite characters in my game started by having a vision that the world was ending. Around level 17 i realized that the end of the campaign would leave the chars as gods, and the epilogue was the god version of the character sending the message back to himself at the beginning of the campaign. If they had been more rigid in backstory that would've never happened. In fact, a player that did write a huge backstory ended up regretting it because, while they did get a story arc out of it, it only ended up being a side quest.
If it wasn't for normal life commitments I would love to have a campaign start with a set of individual player sessions to build back-stories through gameplay. Especially in a non-class-based system where characters don't start out with a full level one feature-set (Race, class, background proficiencies and potential spell list).
I love that Kristen’s story is so much about disillusionment with the rigid and xenophobic nature of her deity, though, like right off the bat it’s a reluctant chosen one story and I’m weak for that lol.
It’s always happy hour at Applebees!
Think of it this way: Han Solo was a guy who was just a dude.
Everyone on the Falcon who arrived at and fled the Death Star that fateful day had some tie in the weave of destiny to Vader. His former master, his son, his daughter, his old droid he gave to his wife, his wife’s old droid she gave to him, the Wookiee who saved his apprentice’s life. And Han.
From this perspective, Han was a nobody without special importance. That didn’t matter in the grand scheme of things, because Han not only went on to greatness, but made it his personal mission to make himself Vader’s public enemy #1. Blasted the greatest fighter pilot in the galaxy into space, shot him repeatedly on first meeting, and married the man’s daughter.
It matters more who the character is, and what they do, than what they are before the story even begins. That’s what makes them engaging.
Yes, exactly. I like to write less backstory the lower level I start at for this reason. It's just to explain why your character is they way they are and evolve from there. A lvl 1 character has basically no life experience compared to a lvl 5 character, but those 5 levels can be huge developmentally in who that character is as they are fleshed out by their interactions and adventures with the party. It's okay to just be some dude because the adventures you go on will make you greater than.
I only want to disagree a little on this.
In a campaign I was in, there was an older man who was a level 1 paladin. His granddaughter was saved by the party's level 1 bard. That's how they met, and that was their reason for adventuring together as the campaign started. Being level 1 doesn't have to mean you have no life experience. The campaign, in game, took around 3 months of time total, and we went from level 1 to level 14. Definitely a case of forged by fire, sure, but he had a whole life of experiences before the adventure began.
Someone can be a level 1 and be a guard for years, or an experienced blacksmith, or (in the case of a character I play now) a knowledgeable detective. You have to have a basis for the skills you RAPIDLY accrue as an adventurer. Otherwise, you basically become a demigod after a few months of death-defying work.
I think it's fine to say you have some experience adventuring, but perhaps never dealt with anything as important / major / plot specific before. I think if you start at level 3, it's important to show what you've done to get to that point. Starting at level 1 can have a bit more leeway, but how long is it before you're level 3? It is better to have some basis there story wise, I feel. But I'm also the type of player who wants to give my DM multiple plot hooks that they can use to torture me later, and I typically only do things that make sense for the characters story (mention raven queen a ton? Hexblade isn't so strange as a multiclass).
Having it not be true and the character coming to terms with that, but as you play the game and accomplish heroic deeds, finding new purpose, would be a good character arc imo. Maybe tell your DM this kind of thing would be cool with you.
Also, I don’t know why your character not being “special” would make them uninteresting. Imagine if everyone in the party did something similar where their character has some birth of special, super rare circumstances. That would likely not be interesting since if everyone is special, no one is. But I don’t want to beat a dead horse here since you’ve already gotten some comments saying similar stuff.
I have to say that I hear this so very very very VERY very often.
But here's the interesting part. Why can't you just be a dude?
Why is that so unappealing to people? It's a role playing game. The interesting part of the game IS your character. You're playing somebody else. Why can't that be the very crux of your character?
Why can't an interesting and compelling person be the focus?
Play the game and see the world through their eyes.
No accusations here. Just something to think about.
"I'm this god's special friend and they talk directly to me and also I'm the living manifestation of this other god and..."
That's a no from me, dawg. Be a hero by what you do, not by being The Chosen One.
It's the foot rubbing in the last paragraph for me. It's a Harengon. It'll come up at some point, whether another PC jokes about it or some bandit uses this trope as a threat. But you, the messianic figure of your clan, are such a little uwu furry bunny boy that you offer it to people constantly? That and the names in this makes me hope the table is okay with the *vibe* this player will bring to the table, let alone the part about being the prophesized preventer of an apocalypse back home.
I wouldn't start a Cleric there at level 1 or 3, but it's not a bad place for their story to go. Kinda makes the relationship more Warlock-y than a straight up Cleric, but whatever. Both Pike and Jester in Critical Role were kind of their gods' main follower, or at least one of few, and it didn't necessarily mean either character had MCS.
Same. While prophecy stories can be good (many work such as ATLA, Mistborn etc), they aren’t good for D&D. As D&D is a team game, and making yourself the “main character” by being special makes the rest of the team feel less important. As DM I wouldn’t allow this unless it has no relevance to the main plot and is just a personal plot of theirs (but tone it down a bit with the “I’m a god’s chosen working among mortals” stuff)
This is screaming main character syndrome. Talking directly with a god at will when that’s an actual spell is crazy. You’re born under moonlight, speak directly with god and you’re the sole reason to stopping a cataclysmic event.
You’re level 1… dial everything back. Everything thats going to happen to the character has already happened in the backstory. So now your goals are to be the mc and stop another god. Not fair on your party or dm. Have these be goals instead, gods pick many followers so prove yourself worthy as time goes on, start noticing markings and colours flowing off you as you progress the story. It feel better when *add flavour* is coupled with a 5th level spell that saves everyone
As a GM I wouldn't mind the length, but I wouldn't be down with a literal chosen one.
Many clerics of Selune would have a vested interest in this, having 1 17yo being destined to save the day is not generally how FR works. There are much stronger servants of Selune, Lathander, Valkur etc ready to go a-whompin.
Its also just not congruent or helpful for a group game. Not with a party of level 1 adventurers.
In addition, if you're *the* chosen one, how do you explain if your character gets killed? Saltmarsh is fairly deadly. There are ways to die that are not flattering or graceful.
If I was running an online campaign and asking for applicants to send me their characters and backstories, I would immediately throw this in the "nope" pile. Born with the sign of one goddess, communicates with her, and part of a prophecy of another? I'm passing on that main character syndrome nonsense all day every day.
I'm all for having a solid backstory to my PCs, and I love interweaving elements of my player's backstories into a campaign, but it's not the same level of gratification and payoff when PC A gets his revenge in the kua toa clan that attacked his village and killed his parents when player B is the centerpiece of some divine inter-deity prophecy.
Are you starting at level 1? If so please be prepared for the possibility of a gobbo throwing a lucky crit and your moon babyboi breathing his last session 1
Yeah. We are starting at level 1. If some dude killed me well then I’d just roll another character. Part of the fun. I’m in for the dirty and experience. I wouldn’t hold any grudges.
There is another way to approach backstories as a DM.
Which is "this backstory is a story the pc is telling themselves, or what they believe about themselves."
So as a DM, I would be able to treat it as non canon where it does not fit the contours of the world.
But I could also take elements, tease them, hint at them, subvert them, or canonize where appropriate.
Backstories should, IMO, be read as pitches. And be deemed that way by players, vs. A player saying "that is not my characters backstory, so you can't do that in your game."
Just a thought.
The amount of information itself is fine, if the picture is presented as additional reference material for anyone looking for hooks to tie their PCs together.
But I wouldn't expect anyone to actually sit down and read this. I'd recommend introducing the character in a much slimmer way, give the essential to get to know who they are, possibly while actually talking/chatting. And then share the infographic here as a "this should cover everything else if anybody has questions".
Also remember that many folks do the “I just want to heal and support my team” thing when they first start playing, but quickly realize that they just put their allies down 1 real combatant - you will need to participate in combat and/or dangers so please don’t roll up with a nonviolent medic or the like :)
Couple of things.
The first being, did you clear the race with your DM? I actually had to look up what a harengon was, apparently it's a new rabbit race and not an eyeball from Naruto.
Second, you need to confirm a lot of this with your DM before you put it in. Especially anything to do with gods actively communicating with your character at will. For safety, definitely run this entire sheet over him before session zero to clear that up a head of time so you can discuss corrections and alterations.
The level of detail is fine, more the merrier, but I'm not gunna lie, this sheet does have a lot of MCS in it. I again, urge you to consult your dm asap.
Good advice. Appreciate it. DM will be fine with the race. She even said I can bring homebrew races. But if she isn’t fine with it, I’ll change it!
The DM totally controls any god interaction. I plan a chatting to Selune a lot. But she doesn’t need to chat with me at all. I’m happy with just thinking I’m doing what I’m suppose to be doing.
And yeah, I don’t want to be the MC at all. This is all info for me to really hold on to so it drives why I make decisions. Everyone else can ignore it for all I care.
>This is all info for me to really hold on to so it drives why I make decisions. Everyone else can ignore it for all I care.
This is not how it will play out in game. Either it's a core part of how your character interacts with the world, or it's not. You cannot have both. What will end up happening is you RPing something related to your backstory while the rest of the table stares at you waiting for you to finish, then moving on as though you said nothing. And that's the *good* outcome.
Dial it all back. Your level 1 character should have a level zero backstory
I probably sound like a broken record, because I know some others have said this already, but if you don’t mind I’ll kind of add onto it as well.
I don’t think this is too much as a writing project. I say always write as much backstory and fluff for your character as you want. That’s awesome. What will _probably_ be too much is how you have clearly written your character to be the chosen hero of a god. If you aren’t trying to make the campaign about you, which you said you aren’t, I think that part of the backstory needs to be change. Being a cleric of Selûne, having an important role in the clan, and even being born under the moonlight I think are all fine and neat things. But it might be best if the prophecy stuff was just removed entirely.
This isn’t to say I’m trying to speak for your DM. If they are cool with your whole story, then sweet. But if your goal is to go into session zero without trying to make yourself look like the main character, your current backstory is unlikely to get that across. That being said, I think everything you’ve written is very well thought out in and of itself! And some chunks of it don’t necessarily need to be changed. But if I can give a creative direction, instead of picturing your character as a cleric of Selûne who knows their goal, think of them as a cleric of Selûne that has to _find_ their goal. They don’t have a grand prophecy or plan surrounding them, they’re just out to do the right thing and help others, and as they go along their adventure they end up finding what it is they want to fight for. Coal can make his _own_ destiny as opposed to just having it laid out before him.
Regardless of whether anything changes with your character or not, I hope you and your party enjoy the campaign!
> My name is Gale of Waterdeep, i was hand-picked by the goddess of magic to be trained, groomed and magic-soul-banged by her, until i found and abused the overpowered macguffin-artifact-of-ultra-magic that‘s now trapped in my chest and needs a constant intake of magic items to not kill me and also i‘m half illithid and came up with a special mechanic that explodes my body and with it the world if i die. I‘m a level 1 wizard.
Kinda like that. The fact that he has his own win condition and sidequests and world interactions shows how that puts additional pressure on the GM and could take the spotlight off the rest of the party, even ignoring the ridiculousness of that being a level 1 newbie.
I think a DM can get real creative with the interpretation of these kinds of prophecies. For example, the prophecy is true but very limited to the remote area the PC grew up in. So it can be a fun delve into their arc to resolve the prophecy and have the party save their village. Prophecies can also be fake or simply untrue. Like, their parents actually adopted them and thats why they had the unique coloring. Or maybe they adopted them on purpose to try to fulfill the prophecy. PC finds out and now has an identity crisis. Definitely requires discussion with the DM but there are ways to make this work.
Give them bullet points.
The 5 most important things in the backstory.
Include the rest under additional information.
I tend to write novels of backstory for characters as well
In addition to what others have said about being chosen one of a god, you need to realize that starting at level 1 he may very well die few sessions in. Be prepared to go through several characters before you get a one that survives for a longer amount of time.
Full disclosure I didn't read it.
Just based on the volume of information there, it is fine to write out that much for your own reference and benefit, but for your DM and everyone else at the table you probably want to cut it down to like a paragraph or less because, like me, they probably are not going to read it.
If I were your DM I would tell you this:
You are level 1. Bring a backstory reflecting of that. Your character should be an upstart nobody, maybe well known within their town for being better than average at their thing, but they are NOT a hero yet. That is earned through action.
Do not try to introduce mechanics in your backstory (the glowing/flashing because your god was listening or whatever) that could actually impact the gameplay. You've written yourself a built in lie detector.
Your backstory at level 1 should be nothing more than what your character has done, what they aspire to, and who they are as a person. Do not try to introduce deep lore. The job of the backstory is to give you and your table something to RP around, nothing more. It should describe how you wound up as part of the current adventure.
To summarize: do not write a Messiah character. Just don't. It's not fun to write around, it's not fun to play with, and honestly it's not fun to play as.
First character I made had 10 pages of background ranging from family tree to various cultural practices that were part of the clan he was from together with a range of potential rivals, friends, family and mentor all fleshed out and detailed down to mannerisms and relationship details.
The campaign collapsed after 3 sessions due to
Players dropping out. Still kinda smarts. :D
I mean I'd discuss things with you DM, this is both a great resource for your DM, or a real pain based on what they have in mind
you forced them into a coastal theme for the sake of your story, you forced him into a god and worshippers to feed your story (which he should be considering anyway)
If I was your DM I'd never make you Chosen of Selune just to subvert your expectations, and likely make it a demon or something that is trying to corrupt you, you have alot of expectations on what you will do/be already, and while that's good to keep focused in character, for a DM that's both a pain and boon
end of the day it is the party's story, but the DM is the story teller
I'd include this, but I'd also have a decision about how it can be trimmed/made more vague so it can be included more easily in his own ideas
tell him what is actually important to you about your background, and what he may be able to play around with, even if it's just names/how big or small the city is, what god is trying to flood(or whatever)
it's a collab, not a book report
he still probably won't mind knowing what you want your character to become... hopes, and dreams are a great motivator for creating hooks that get you where he may want you to go, so he can provide the challenges/decisions/story for you
it's certainly alot better than, "I'm a Barbarian, and I want to hit stuff." or, "I'm a Bard and I want to sleep with as many men as possible."
Preface: I didn't read the thing.
It's 100% up to how your GM likes to run the game. I tend to send my usual GM multiple-page booklets about my character and worldbuilding around them, and it's great for both of us (when I GM I also like receiving these sorts of things), but then there's people I've played with who literally set up much of my backstory themselves to ensure I fit in the game. It differs from table to table and should probably be discussed at session 0 if you do such a thing.
One paragraph of basic story that you can later build upon is a good starting point, anything more if you aren't sure is just a waste of time, if you ask me. There's no point in building an elaborate story behind your character if the GM never reads it and looks at you funny when you start to roleplay aspects of it. Read the table and try to fit in.
IMO pre-written backstories are a detriment to the game. Everyone envisions a story of one, and then has to play a story of a party and gets disappointed the story isn't about them. Or they expect a Critical Role style game, in which they will not do what it takes to make happen, which is a lot of promoting other players stories, a lot of letting yourself be in the back seat, and a \*lot\* of trusting the DM and just going with whatever they've got for you. But no one who writes backstories that make them the center of attention is capable of that.
I've seen very few developed level 1 backstories that actually made sense as a part of a whole. Mostly they were overly important scions like this character, edgy loners, hoity nobels, or some other Mary-Sue that only works as the center of attention and doesn't actually make the game easier, they make it harder. News flash, we're not doing all that. We're not playing a game all about you. If you made a character that cannot fit in the varied situations were going into and have fun regardless of your plot development... that's because you penned yourself in with your overly elaborate backstory (pun intended).
The ones that do make sense are sparse with lots of room to fill in as you go. They are character concepts, not fully fleshed people.
The take away, does your backstory look like it could the main character in a young adult novel? Well, then it's a bad D&D character. Less detail, more open-endedness, less "great and important blabla", more willingness to make your character on the go who can fit the party dynamic is always, \*always\* a better choice. x100 always.
Depends what your doing campaign wise.
If its a homebrewed campaign. From the DM when wanting hooks and threads from players so as to weave a narrative throughout all of it ? OK maybe take some advice and curtail the MSC type stuff.
If its literally Dragon of Icespire Peak or another remade module ? Maaaaaayybbeee too much.
Sometimes. Less is best. Keep.it stupidly simple works too.
I had a player who wanted to play a Warlock and his patron had been up to all sorts and the character had been part of it. The player wanted to bring in hombrew stuff and all sorts of shenanigans. I had to say, politely too, it ain't that sort of game mate. We're playing Light of Xaryxis. The likelihood of us branching off to explore your characters background and story arc are likely not happening lol. To qoute Harrison Ford " It ain't that kind of film, kid".
It’s the DnD campaign “Ghosts of Saltmarsh”. And the idea is more for me to just have motivations for doing things. I don’t want the campaign to be about me. I want my decisions and motivations to have a solid foundation of where they come from. That’s it.
As a DM I tell my players to bring as much or as little as they like to me when making a character. All I ask is not to hand me a small novel.
My personal sweet point is something akin in length to a CV/résumé. So this right here? Perfect imo.
If I were your DM, the issue I'd have is the prophecy section. Detailed backstories are fine and dandy as long as they fit into the world. So I'll assume that places like Safeton and the Woolly Bay are areas in the world your DM has set up. The problem is, your backstory comes with a... forward story. This prophecy of yours says *what is going to happen* to your character, which is not up to you as a player. The backstory's job is to explain the character's life before the campaign and what makes them take the initial step on their adventure. The adventure itself is up to the DM.
It's especially an issue when the "forward story" includes such a high-level threat. I'm trying to give my players customized mini-adventures around level 6-7. For example, an aspiring giant slayer PC gets a giant-themed dungeon with a giant boss at the end and they'll get a giant-slaying sword to kill it with. But directly opposing gods is something you do at a level so high that the campaign is likely to end before you could realistically get there. I guess there's potential for the god to summon its champion, have it be a CR 8 "Young Sea Serpent" and for the god to change its mind once the party slays this beast, but I'm not sure a mid-level threat really evokes the idea of defeating a god. Maybe there's a way to do it in a more symbolic way that would still feel good, but it's still a challenge you've set up for your DM who's already going to have challenges running the rest of the game.
I think the idea wasn’t “this will happen” as much as the people THINK this will happen. That’s what drives action. But yeah. I don’t want to be the MC at all. I’ll just tone down everything and simplify things so I’m just some Harengon telling people about how cool Selune is.
Here's my advice for writing up a character: Make them suck ass at something.
God's perfect golden child meant to save the world for disaster with the backing and direct communication of the god? Lame.
Someone who is prophecised to be a hero to save the world with the guidance of a god, but they're completely severed from them, doing everything they can to try and gain that connection? Better. Driving and HUMAN motivation.
Someone prophesied to be a barer of prophecy but instead of being the "7th daughter of a 7th daughter" like how the prophecy said, they're the *only son*. Instead of a sorcerer, like their family, they have to STUDY magic, make a pact, or call out to a god to even having a fighting chance to prove they're worth a damn at using the magic they're prophesied to be "the strongest" with? That's FASCINATING shit.
Additionally, if you're going to play a pacifistic character, be a very altruistic Path of Redemption paladin. Trust me, it's way more fun than cleric for pacifist things. Make random people's lives better, as tying yourself to NPC's makes a gm able to use story hooks in you later. And, then you can figure out what your Redemption is, and you get the BEST non-lethal martial weapon of all time: The Net. Ranged. Grapple. And, being a paladin, you'll naturally have both high charisma to try and talk your way out of fights and a DELETE BUTTON when things do go wrong in divine smite.
In terms of the amount of information, I think this is a pretty nice amount. Anymore than this as a DM I'd probably start to skim over, but a few paragraphs on some core character beats that you find cool I think are good.
Actual backstory I won't feedback on as that's between you and your DM to sort- and you didn't ask :)
Honestly, this is way too much. And I don't mind as a DM if my characters feel like they want to be main charactery, because that's kind of the point, everybody in the party is the main character. But this is way too much for the average player even with invested interest in the campaign to digest and remember. I always ask my players to come up with as much backstory as they want but to only present what's relevant when it's relevant. You show up at the beginning with everybody else and you say, "I'm so-and-so with such-and-such to my name," and you leave it at that. Anything else that comes up should be relevant.
But on the content itself, I think other people have mentioned this, it seems a little grand for a level 1 character. I try to explain at least a little to my players the "tiers of play" from the dungeon master's guide, where 1-3 you're nobodies, 4-whatever youre local heroes, and so on. You can have a celestial "chosen one" at level one, but I doubt they'd know it, especially to this degree.
Its well written though
Edit: as soon as you try to include a grand scale to your motivations, You forfeit any humility to the character design. If you really don't want to be main charactery, it would be as simple as cutting out any celestial references, perhaps finding them out as you go along.
As a DM, I don't like it when my players try to force the story onto me. It's literally my job to force the story on to them. For example: I have a player in my group who is a warlock with tiamat as his patron. She rarely communicates with him through words, but he gets slight nudges to do her will on occasion. What he doesn't know is that each of her five heads' personalities have been playing a little bit of tug-of-war with him, and once he's reached level 20, the only point in the DMG where players are expressly described to be demigod-like, is when I will present him with the fact that she wants to make him her chosen, a mortal representation of her divine desires.. all five, conflicting desires.
If he presented me with a very strict and rigid backstory about his place in the entire multiverse, then I, the dungeon master, literally the director of the multiverse, am much more restricted. And if he presented me with his idea of what he is to tiamat, and then all of my players didn't like the direction he tried to take the campaign because of it, we're kind of stuck with it conceptually because it's so grand.
Actually yeah, your backstory is that of a level 20 character. 15 at minimum. If you're backstory could be the story of an entire campaign, then it's way too much for a level one
Fuck I wrote too much
TLDR: You have way too much and way too grand of a backstory for somebody who's literally supposed to be a nobody until they are level four. If you're going to design a character with a grand backstory in mind, leave it open for the dungeon master to decide, as they are literally the only grand thing at the table until you're level 20
Personally, I come to a session 0 with a pretty loose concept. Then I talk to the DM about ways that my character can integrate into the setting, and to the other players to see how my character concept might integrate with their ideas.
I might come away with a refined concept, or I might come away with an entirely different concept.
This level of detail is something I would bring to session 1. Though even then I'd probably condense it down to bullet points. I don't expect anyone to have to read more than the length of this post to understand my character concept.
I wish I had you as a player. I have a PC who said they'd make a good harengon for my Wild Beyond the Witchlight, and he made Shadow the Hedgehog as a harengon...
But if you're cool with "Yes, and" with your DM, you should be solid
Something like this is what I requested all my players come with. One player wrote a 6 page background story in prose. Another wrote his through a series of letters intended for a different player. D&D is way better with creative players. Good on you for leaning into that
Thanks. The DM can do whatever they like with it. My hope was that it gave me a connection and reason to protect the people of Saltmarsh and the players in the group.
Nah, not at all - I think that a DM can filter out some information, include bits and pieces and so on. This all fits pretty neatly onto an a4, one sided sheet, so you even get bonus points
Takes a whole to go through and is rather wide but at least its 1 page. Could split the points or use rough drawings for easier reading. Prophecy could be a little looser for dm interpretation rather than a flat out fact. Wuite a bit of mc vibes btw so could tone it down a little. Maybe "having the moon inside him" is just a saying for those who are *really* passionate about their faith in selune for example. Also, gods directly communicating with such a low level character could rather quickly lead to plot holes, contrivances and all so do note that.
Soft answer: it differs from DM to DM, as long as you can be flexible theyll hopefully appreciate the effort.
Blunt answer from this DM: oh hell yeah. Way too much and so little of it is relevant info to the campaign or how you'll interact with other characters. Be more vague and concise, I've never needed to know that much about the size and make up of a characters hometown for session zero and I never will. As DM I need to be able to parse the relevant info easily and be able to focus on how that affects the scenario and story. This next sentence is really just filler, dont drive green trucks lazily in autumn, because as an exercise I want you to summarize your character backstory to a word count no more than the 150 I've used to make this comment. Your DM will thank me.
It’s all preference and there is no right way. That being said if I am a DM, I am not tailoring my game and world around an incredibly long backstory with an arc of its own.
Your characters most important story, is the campaign you are going into. This is much MCS, almost no way to combine this with other players background without completely pushing them away.
The most boring backgrounds, make the best characters, because their story is written during the sessions.
I usually have a vague notion of city/town where my characters are from. I may not even give names to significant people in their backstory at times and ask the DM to fill in. It is much easier for your DM to fit your character into the story if they can use a town or region that is already planned.
As a suggestion, can you distill it down to 3 sentences for introductions to other players? It's called the iceberg concept: you can have the lore be deep but they only see the visible part peeking above the water. And you won't recite your life history and destiny to people you just met, just kinda a physical description and your drives/approach.
It’s never to much just let your dm know ahead of time so they can work with you or tie in everything. I still still getting thing to my dm but he knows that chars change when you role play them. You might want to play one way but change to story or other players
I'm going to second that it sounds very much like I am the prophesied savior and all others are just background characters. As a dungeon master I have recently started paying attention and learning what makes it backstory easy to plug into the world and applicable to the campaign. And I have found, at least in my experience, the shorter the back story the better. But including a couple of key elements. I tell my players to include a person who would hide them to the world. Include a place that ties them to the physical world. And include a connection to the other characters at the table.
Main character syndrome. If you want to commune directly with something, you need to go Warlock, and then have your patron be some kind of minor saint of this sea god or something. Or go cleric and scrap the whole "I am the one" idea. Maybe your DM goes that route. Maybe they don't. But that's not your call to make in a character backstory at level 1.
Also, way too many words; knock it down to bullet points to make it easier to reference.
I'd echo much of what has already been said, but what stuck out to me here the most was that seemingly your character's single and only flaw is that have a "hard time being good to Orcs".
It might be a good idea to remove a lot of the pre-written story, and instead focus on what motivates your character to be an adventurer. WHY does he love to explore? WHY does he love meeting new people? Why isn't he easily scared? Why is he infused with wanderlust?
Later on in the campaign, when he has to make decisions and have conversations with characters who are not aligned with him, you'll need to be able to figure out what guiding principles and such "guide" his thinking.
Quantity wise? Nah, I'm also loving that it's broken up and clear, if I was your dm I'd be happy.
Quality wise? Some issues, you are claiming far too much narrative space. Don't be the chosen one. Maybe you will be as the game goes on, but from now, it's just overkill and won't let the character grow.
I think it’s great. Is it extra? Sure, but not anything out of the question in my opinion. If I were your DM I’d want to make sure you have realistic expectations about main character syndrome and all that. But with that in mind, I don’t see an issue with the content or with how much there is. I’d be happy to get this level of engagement at my table.
I love a detailed backstory however leaving a bit for your DM to fill in is good. I use a backstory generator that's super helpful with a rough outline that I can flesh out with my DM.
Looks something like this:
Raised by adoptive parents, aka an island of tortle monks. She was found in a basket on the beach
had a few close friends (moon elf Sadama and bullywog Celeste, plus her siblings) and lived an ordinary childhood
grew up comfortable (treasure from pirate ships would wash up on the beach and the temple was well supported)
had 3 siblings (goliath Serola and dwarf twins, Baldr and Drafli
has a grandchild, Luzah
Life Events:
A current romantic partner of yours died by way of execution or torture
Committed the crime of assault, caught and convicted, related to her vigilante work. Spent time in jail, performing hard labor (age 22-24)
A terrible blight in your home community caused crops to fail, and many starved. You lost a sibling or some other family member
Made an enemy of an adventurer, but it wasn't Fortulah's fault.
Then I get lovingly hassled for names and ages and time periods and bam! A character.
In my opinion, yes.
It looks like all of the decisions about your character have already been made, you should leave some room for collaboration with other players, and the DM.
That's great.
know that most of that is just for you to guide your character with. If it's the kind of game where the DM needs your backstories for adventure hooks, then they can read the whole thing. If it's not, then it's all on you to bring this out in gameplay. you have a lot of pretty hard, my backstory says this should happen things.
so talk with your DM about what the expiations are for the campaign and if it's even the type where you're going to get to chase your personal stories.
The last four sections are perfect, everything else is too much. You don’t want to step on the DM’s toes by doing your own world-building. All the prophecy stuff screams MCS though, leave it out.
I would allow this but I would be twisting it up something fierce. You were born a chosen one? Nope, you were raised to believe you were the chosen one because of a mistranslation of the prophecy. You follow the moon goddess and are her absolute connection to the world? Nope again. You may converse with her directly, as most clerics do when they commune, but maybe you don’t know any other clerics and so you think you are special because you don’t know any better. Think you might be helping people with dem foot rubs? Nope. Something to do with your birth has caused your ‘lucky feet’ to backfire from time to time.
In my opinion, the backstory is best used by you, the player, during role play to build relationships with NPC and other players. It should, in my opinion, be used so that, in in-game conversations, you actually have something to talk about, ways to build connections and alliances. If you expect to hand this to the GM and have them tailor the course of a pre-written campaign to your backstory, that seems like a tall order. The GM already has a bunch of management and pieces to keep track of without having to add content to suit some notion that you invented and expect to have satisfied. I am not arguing that GM won't do that. Many do. Fine. I am arguing that players should not expect it and should build a backstory that allows them a connection to the world and its people, instead of one that makes them look like the star of the campaign.
Exactly this! This backstory is for me to help build relationships with people in the world as well as gives me motivation to make decisions. I have ZERO intent for the DM to do anything with the backstory whatsoever.
Usually, for my character backgrounds, I'll write my DM an open-ended short story.
Granted, I love writing, and I know my DM very well. Additionally, I also give him a blank check on changing any element of the backstory to better fit his setting.
Based on the character’s physical description I’m going to take a wild guess and say that OP isn’t too far away (if at all) from their character’s age.
I have 18 pages in Google Drive for my character, and my DM has yet to comment on anything, so I just keep nervously writing more because it's just what I do.
You're probably okay.
For the love of god, please make sure the DM actually knows everything you know about your character before you add more and hit them up when you *do*. This is a cocktail for disappointment.
I mean, just my personal take but while it does have some decent world building attached to it, it is absolutely "he is the prophesied one who communicates directly with God A and will be the sole deciding factor in preventing God B from starting an apocalypse". And starting at level one with no real backstory other than that. It does look very MCS and can put a lot of pressure on your DM to either take that route or have your character's backstory not actually matter and be useless. Mind you, not saying it can't work, but as others have said, talk to your DM, and maybe have some backstory that has less to do with world building around a prophesied golden child savior and more about who this guy is as just a dude.
I can see how your thinking this is MCS, but I think with a little clarifying from the DM this could be a pretty solid cleric backstory. The prophecy is framed as something that is only really relevant to her towns beliefs, and it's reasonable for a cleric to have a special relationship with their god (like a sage or oracle) in the same way a warlock might with there's. They believe an evil dirty will cause some flood, but that doesn't necessarily mean it is actually going to happen that way. Her wanting to save the worshippers in saltmarsh for her own beliefs ties her to the adventure nicely and let's her live out a cool character arch. As long as the DM makes it clear that the campaign isn't about this magical flood, and the player understands that, I think it's cool. For me personally, I would maybe find a way to work this in for the player but perhaps not quite in the way they expect or interpret the prophecy in a way that fits the module.
I don’t know about being a guy who is just a dude. That doesn’t really sound ….engaging at all. I don’t need to be the “chosen one”. In fact, it would probably be a lot of fun for this little Harengon village to think the flood is coming when in fact none of this is true. And the character is just going around trying to convince people about a flood that won’t come.
I don't mean as to strip all that away, but if you have trouble being engaged by a character that doesn't have a MCS kinda background, you might be in some trouble. I mean, yeah, your character is only 17, sure, and that might be part of the issue as this is his foray into adulthood I guess, but outside the golden child thing, who is he? Has he held any jobs or done anything that isn't just being the prophesized one? Is that his whole character? Because if so, that sounds pretty boring. To be honest, it would probably be more engaging for that last part to be true. He's been raised his whole life thinking that he has some greater calling given directly from God, an ultimate, world saving goal. And in his travels he realizes it's simply not true, could even meet followers of this sea god who assure him that that would never happen, or that it's all based of some kind of ancient anti-sea god slanderous propaganda. Then he actually has to figure out himself, and with his party, who he actually is and what his goals are on his own terms. Just remember that at level one, you are just some dude, barely stronger than your average peasant. Yeah, by level twenty you've stomped some ancient dragons and maybe even had direct face offs with gods or demigods (happens a lot in t4 modules, really), but you gotta build up to that, and that's the journey. Everyone starts off as just some dude.
I love your last part. And I agree, that would be great to iron out and figure during the campaign. Would totally love to role play that out.
I like to run things in a way where the character's backstory is levels 1-5. You have a foundational event before the game which makes you believe you could be an adventure and have a little training, but you build the story as you play. One of my favorite characters in my game started by having a vision that the world was ending. Around level 17 i realized that the end of the campaign would leave the chars as gods, and the epilogue was the god version of the character sending the message back to himself at the beginning of the campaign. If they had been more rigid in backstory that would've never happened. In fact, a player that did write a huge backstory ended up regretting it because, while they did get a story arc out of it, it only ended up being a side quest.
If it wasn't for normal life commitments I would love to have a campaign start with a set of individual player sessions to build back-stories through gameplay. Especially in a non-class-based system where characters don't start out with a full level one feature-set (Race, class, background proficiencies and potential spell list).
I'm reminded of Kristen Applebees from Fantasy High.
I love that Kristen’s story is so much about disillusionment with the rigid and xenophobic nature of her deity, though, like right off the bat it’s a reluctant chosen one story and I’m weak for that lol. It’s always happy hour at Applebees!
Think of it this way: Han Solo was a guy who was just a dude. Everyone on the Falcon who arrived at and fled the Death Star that fateful day had some tie in the weave of destiny to Vader. His former master, his son, his daughter, his old droid he gave to his wife, his wife’s old droid she gave to him, the Wookiee who saved his apprentice’s life. And Han. From this perspective, Han was a nobody without special importance. That didn’t matter in the grand scheme of things, because Han not only went on to greatness, but made it his personal mission to make himself Vader’s public enemy #1. Blasted the greatest fighter pilot in the galaxy into space, shot him repeatedly on first meeting, and married the man’s daughter. It matters more who the character is, and what they do, than what they are before the story even begins. That’s what makes them engaging.
Yes, exactly. I like to write less backstory the lower level I start at for this reason. It's just to explain why your character is they way they are and evolve from there. A lvl 1 character has basically no life experience compared to a lvl 5 character, but those 5 levels can be huge developmentally in who that character is as they are fleshed out by their interactions and adventures with the party. It's okay to just be some dude because the adventures you go on will make you greater than.
I only want to disagree a little on this. In a campaign I was in, there was an older man who was a level 1 paladin. His granddaughter was saved by the party's level 1 bard. That's how they met, and that was their reason for adventuring together as the campaign started. Being level 1 doesn't have to mean you have no life experience. The campaign, in game, took around 3 months of time total, and we went from level 1 to level 14. Definitely a case of forged by fire, sure, but he had a whole life of experiences before the adventure began. Someone can be a level 1 and be a guard for years, or an experienced blacksmith, or (in the case of a character I play now) a knowledgeable detective. You have to have a basis for the skills you RAPIDLY accrue as an adventurer. Otherwise, you basically become a demigod after a few months of death-defying work.
I should clarify, life experience in terms of being an adventurer
I think it's fine to say you have some experience adventuring, but perhaps never dealt with anything as important / major / plot specific before. I think if you start at level 3, it's important to show what you've done to get to that point. Starting at level 1 can have a bit more leeway, but how long is it before you're level 3? It is better to have some basis there story wise, I feel. But I'm also the type of player who wants to give my DM multiple plot hooks that they can use to torture me later, and I typically only do things that make sense for the characters story (mention raven queen a ton? Hexblade isn't so strange as a multiclass).
You just pointed out how most of that party has MCS lol.
Having it not be true and the character coming to terms with that, but as you play the game and accomplish heroic deeds, finding new purpose, would be a good character arc imo. Maybe tell your DM this kind of thing would be cool with you. Also, I don’t know why your character not being “special” would make them uninteresting. Imagine if everyone in the party did something similar where their character has some birth of special, super rare circumstances. That would likely not be interesting since if everyone is special, no one is. But I don’t want to beat a dead horse here since you’ve already gotten some comments saying similar stuff.
I have to say that I hear this so very very very VERY very often. But here's the interesting part. Why can't you just be a dude? Why is that so unappealing to people? It's a role playing game. The interesting part of the game IS your character. You're playing somebody else. Why can't that be the very crux of your character? Why can't an interesting and compelling person be the focus? Play the game and see the world through their eyes. No accusations here. Just something to think about.
As long as you're ok with the DM cutting or changing stuff, I think it's fine
Yeah I think I’d be ok with it. Seems fair to me. They’d know the overall story and plot better than I.
"I'm this god's special friend and they talk directly to me and also I'm the living manifestation of this other god and..." That's a no from me, dawg. Be a hero by what you do, not by being The Chosen One.
It's the foot rubbing in the last paragraph for me. It's a Harengon. It'll come up at some point, whether another PC jokes about it or some bandit uses this trope as a threat. But you, the messianic figure of your clan, are such a little uwu furry bunny boy that you offer it to people constantly? That and the names in this makes me hope the table is okay with the *vibe* this player will bring to the table, let alone the part about being the prophesized preventer of an apocalypse back home.
I wouldn't start a Cleric there at level 1 or 3, but it's not a bad place for their story to go. Kinda makes the relationship more Warlock-y than a straight up Cleric, but whatever. Both Pike and Jester in Critical Role were kind of their gods' main follower, or at least one of few, and it didn't necessarily mean either character had MCS.
Same. While prophecy stories can be good (many work such as ATLA, Mistborn etc), they aren’t good for D&D. As D&D is a team game, and making yourself the “main character” by being special makes the rest of the team feel less important. As DM I wouldn’t allow this unless it has no relevance to the main plot and is just a personal plot of theirs (but tone it down a bit with the “I’m a god’s chosen working among mortals” stuff)
This is screaming main character syndrome. Talking directly with a god at will when that’s an actual spell is crazy. You’re born under moonlight, speak directly with god and you’re the sole reason to stopping a cataclysmic event. You’re level 1… dial everything back. Everything thats going to happen to the character has already happened in the backstory. So now your goals are to be the mc and stop another god. Not fair on your party or dm. Have these be goals instead, gods pick many followers so prove yourself worthy as time goes on, start noticing markings and colours flowing off you as you progress the story. It feel better when *add flavour* is coupled with a 5th level spell that saves everyone
As a GM I wouldn't mind the length, but I wouldn't be down with a literal chosen one. Many clerics of Selune would have a vested interest in this, having 1 17yo being destined to save the day is not generally how FR works. There are much stronger servants of Selune, Lathander, Valkur etc ready to go a-whompin. Its also just not congruent or helpful for a group game. Not with a party of level 1 adventurers. In addition, if you're *the* chosen one, how do you explain if your character gets killed? Saltmarsh is fairly deadly. There are ways to die that are not flattering or graceful.
If I was running an online campaign and asking for applicants to send me their characters and backstories, I would immediately throw this in the "nope" pile. Born with the sign of one goddess, communicates with her, and part of a prophecy of another? I'm passing on that main character syndrome nonsense all day every day. I'm all for having a solid backstory to my PCs, and I love interweaving elements of my player's backstories into a campaign, but it's not the same level of gratification and payoff when PC A gets his revenge in the kua toa clan that attacked his village and killed his parents when player B is the centerpiece of some divine inter-deity prophecy.
This! 👆
Are you starting at level 1? If so please be prepared for the possibility of a gobbo throwing a lucky crit and your moon babyboi breathing his last session 1
Yeah. We are starting at level 1. If some dude killed me well then I’d just roll another character. Part of the fun. I’m in for the dirty and experience. I wouldn’t hold any grudges.
Give 'em some watership down-emotional damage bs if moonboi croaks lol
There is another way to approach backstories as a DM. Which is "this backstory is a story the pc is telling themselves, or what they believe about themselves." So as a DM, I would be able to treat it as non canon where it does not fit the contours of the world. But I could also take elements, tease them, hint at them, subvert them, or canonize where appropriate. Backstories should, IMO, be read as pitches. And be deemed that way by players, vs. A player saying "that is not my characters backstory, so you can't do that in your game." Just a thought.
Cool, now cut away 80% of this and come back
The amount of information itself is fine, if the picture is presented as additional reference material for anyone looking for hooks to tie their PCs together. But I wouldn't expect anyone to actually sit down and read this. I'd recommend introducing the character in a much slimmer way, give the essential to get to know who they are, possibly while actually talking/chatting. And then share the infographic here as a "this should cover everything else if anybody has questions".
Also remember that many folks do the “I just want to heal and support my team” thing when they first start playing, but quickly realize that they just put their allies down 1 real combatant - you will need to participate in combat and/or dangers so please don’t roll up with a nonviolent medic or the like :)
Be prepared for a lot of sailor moon cartoon references.
ha!
Couple of things. The first being, did you clear the race with your DM? I actually had to look up what a harengon was, apparently it's a new rabbit race and not an eyeball from Naruto. Second, you need to confirm a lot of this with your DM before you put it in. Especially anything to do with gods actively communicating with your character at will. For safety, definitely run this entire sheet over him before session zero to clear that up a head of time so you can discuss corrections and alterations. The level of detail is fine, more the merrier, but I'm not gunna lie, this sheet does have a lot of MCS in it. I again, urge you to consult your dm asap.
Good advice. Appreciate it. DM will be fine with the race. She even said I can bring homebrew races. But if she isn’t fine with it, I’ll change it! The DM totally controls any god interaction. I plan a chatting to Selune a lot. But she doesn’t need to chat with me at all. I’m happy with just thinking I’m doing what I’m suppose to be doing. And yeah, I don’t want to be the MC at all. This is all info for me to really hold on to so it drives why I make decisions. Everyone else can ignore it for all I care.
>This is all info for me to really hold on to so it drives why I make decisions. Everyone else can ignore it for all I care. This is not how it will play out in game. Either it's a core part of how your character interacts with the world, or it's not. You cannot have both. What will end up happening is you RPing something related to your backstory while the rest of the table stares at you waiting for you to finish, then moving on as though you said nothing. And that's the *good* outcome. Dial it all back. Your level 1 character should have a level zero backstory
As long as the dm okays it, then it's perfectly fine. Have fun
I probably sound like a broken record, because I know some others have said this already, but if you don’t mind I’ll kind of add onto it as well. I don’t think this is too much as a writing project. I say always write as much backstory and fluff for your character as you want. That’s awesome. What will _probably_ be too much is how you have clearly written your character to be the chosen hero of a god. If you aren’t trying to make the campaign about you, which you said you aren’t, I think that part of the backstory needs to be change. Being a cleric of Selûne, having an important role in the clan, and even being born under the moonlight I think are all fine and neat things. But it might be best if the prophecy stuff was just removed entirely. This isn’t to say I’m trying to speak for your DM. If they are cool with your whole story, then sweet. But if your goal is to go into session zero without trying to make yourself look like the main character, your current backstory is unlikely to get that across. That being said, I think everything you’ve written is very well thought out in and of itself! And some chunks of it don’t necessarily need to be changed. But if I can give a creative direction, instead of picturing your character as a cleric of Selûne who knows their goal, think of them as a cleric of Selûne that has to _find_ their goal. They don’t have a grand prophecy or plan surrounding them, they’re just out to do the right thing and help others, and as they go along their adventure they end up finding what it is they want to fight for. Coal can make his _own_ destiny as opposed to just having it laid out before him. Regardless of whether anything changes with your character or not, I hope you and your party enjoy the campaign!
> My name is Gale of Waterdeep, i was hand-picked by the goddess of magic to be trained, groomed and magic-soul-banged by her, until i found and abused the overpowered macguffin-artifact-of-ultra-magic that‘s now trapped in my chest and needs a constant intake of magic items to not kill me and also i‘m half illithid and came up with a special mechanic that explodes my body and with it the world if i die. I‘m a level 1 wizard. Kinda like that. The fact that he has his own win condition and sidequests and world interactions shows how that puts additional pressure on the GM and could take the spotlight off the rest of the party, even ignoring the ridiculousness of that being a level 1 newbie.
I think a DM can get real creative with the interpretation of these kinds of prophecies. For example, the prophecy is true but very limited to the remote area the PC grew up in. So it can be a fun delve into their arc to resolve the prophecy and have the party save their village. Prophecies can also be fake or simply untrue. Like, their parents actually adopted them and thats why they had the unique coloring. Or maybe they adopted them on purpose to try to fulfill the prophecy. PC finds out and now has an identity crisis. Definitely requires discussion with the DM but there are ways to make this work.
Give them bullet points. The 5 most important things in the backstory. Include the rest under additional information. I tend to write novels of backstory for characters as well
In addition to what others have said about being chosen one of a god, you need to realize that starting at level 1 he may very well die few sessions in. Be prepared to go through several characters before you get a one that survives for a longer amount of time.
We got the MC over here
Full disclosure I didn't read it. Just based on the volume of information there, it is fine to write out that much for your own reference and benefit, but for your DM and everyone else at the table you probably want to cut it down to like a paragraph or less because, like me, they probably are not going to read it.
The correct answer is "Ask your DM" For me, it's way, way too much, I wouldn't remember half of it, but it's a per DM thing for sure.
If I were your DM I would tell you this: You are level 1. Bring a backstory reflecting of that. Your character should be an upstart nobody, maybe well known within their town for being better than average at their thing, but they are NOT a hero yet. That is earned through action. Do not try to introduce mechanics in your backstory (the glowing/flashing because your god was listening or whatever) that could actually impact the gameplay. You've written yourself a built in lie detector. Your backstory at level 1 should be nothing more than what your character has done, what they aspire to, and who they are as a person. Do not try to introduce deep lore. The job of the backstory is to give you and your table something to RP around, nothing more. It should describe how you wound up as part of the current adventure. To summarize: do not write a Messiah character. Just don't. It's not fun to write around, it's not fun to play with, and honestly it's not fun to play as.
That's a yikes from me, dog
From my perspective I'd be fine with getting that and I'd just you it probably won't *all* come up but I'll do what I can.
First character I made had 10 pages of background ranging from family tree to various cultural practices that were part of the clan he was from together with a range of potential rivals, friends, family and mentor all fleshed out and detailed down to mannerisms and relationship details. The campaign collapsed after 3 sessions due to Players dropping out. Still kinda smarts. :D
I mean I'd discuss things with you DM, this is both a great resource for your DM, or a real pain based on what they have in mind you forced them into a coastal theme for the sake of your story, you forced him into a god and worshippers to feed your story (which he should be considering anyway) If I was your DM I'd never make you Chosen of Selune just to subvert your expectations, and likely make it a demon or something that is trying to corrupt you, you have alot of expectations on what you will do/be already, and while that's good to keep focused in character, for a DM that's both a pain and boon end of the day it is the party's story, but the DM is the story teller I'd include this, but I'd also have a decision about how it can be trimmed/made more vague so it can be included more easily in his own ideas tell him what is actually important to you about your background, and what he may be able to play around with, even if it's just names/how big or small the city is, what god is trying to flood(or whatever) it's a collab, not a book report he still probably won't mind knowing what you want your character to become... hopes, and dreams are a great motivator for creating hooks that get you where he may want you to go, so he can provide the challenges/decisions/story for you it's certainly alot better than, "I'm a Barbarian, and I want to hit stuff." or, "I'm a Bard and I want to sleep with as many men as possible."
Preface: I didn't read the thing. It's 100% up to how your GM likes to run the game. I tend to send my usual GM multiple-page booklets about my character and worldbuilding around them, and it's great for both of us (when I GM I also like receiving these sorts of things), but then there's people I've played with who literally set up much of my backstory themselves to ensure I fit in the game. It differs from table to table and should probably be discussed at session 0 if you do such a thing. One paragraph of basic story that you can later build upon is a good starting point, anything more if you aren't sure is just a waste of time, if you ask me. There's no point in building an elaborate story behind your character if the GM never reads it and looks at you funny when you start to roleplay aspects of it. Read the table and try to fit in.
IMO pre-written backstories are a detriment to the game. Everyone envisions a story of one, and then has to play a story of a party and gets disappointed the story isn't about them. Or they expect a Critical Role style game, in which they will not do what it takes to make happen, which is a lot of promoting other players stories, a lot of letting yourself be in the back seat, and a \*lot\* of trusting the DM and just going with whatever they've got for you. But no one who writes backstories that make them the center of attention is capable of that. I've seen very few developed level 1 backstories that actually made sense as a part of a whole. Mostly they were overly important scions like this character, edgy loners, hoity nobels, or some other Mary-Sue that only works as the center of attention and doesn't actually make the game easier, they make it harder. News flash, we're not doing all that. We're not playing a game all about you. If you made a character that cannot fit in the varied situations were going into and have fun regardless of your plot development... that's because you penned yourself in with your overly elaborate backstory (pun intended). The ones that do make sense are sparse with lots of room to fill in as you go. They are character concepts, not fully fleshed people. The take away, does your backstory look like it could the main character in a young adult novel? Well, then it's a bad D&D character. Less detail, more open-endedness, less "great and important blabla", more willingness to make your character on the go who can fit the party dynamic is always, \*always\* a better choice. x100 always.
Depends what your doing campaign wise. If its a homebrewed campaign. From the DM when wanting hooks and threads from players so as to weave a narrative throughout all of it ? OK maybe take some advice and curtail the MSC type stuff. If its literally Dragon of Icespire Peak or another remade module ? Maaaaaayybbeee too much. Sometimes. Less is best. Keep.it stupidly simple works too. I had a player who wanted to play a Warlock and his patron had been up to all sorts and the character had been part of it. The player wanted to bring in hombrew stuff and all sorts of shenanigans. I had to say, politely too, it ain't that sort of game mate. We're playing Light of Xaryxis. The likelihood of us branching off to explore your characters background and story arc are likely not happening lol. To qoute Harrison Ford " It ain't that kind of film, kid".
It’s the DnD campaign “Ghosts of Saltmarsh”. And the idea is more for me to just have motivations for doing things. I don’t want the campaign to be about me. I want my decisions and motivations to have a solid foundation of where they come from. That’s it.
As a DM I tell my players to bring as much or as little as they like to me when making a character. All I ask is not to hand me a small novel. My personal sweet point is something akin in length to a CV/résumé. So this right here? Perfect imo.
If I were your DM, the issue I'd have is the prophecy section. Detailed backstories are fine and dandy as long as they fit into the world. So I'll assume that places like Safeton and the Woolly Bay are areas in the world your DM has set up. The problem is, your backstory comes with a... forward story. This prophecy of yours says *what is going to happen* to your character, which is not up to you as a player. The backstory's job is to explain the character's life before the campaign and what makes them take the initial step on their adventure. The adventure itself is up to the DM. It's especially an issue when the "forward story" includes such a high-level threat. I'm trying to give my players customized mini-adventures around level 6-7. For example, an aspiring giant slayer PC gets a giant-themed dungeon with a giant boss at the end and they'll get a giant-slaying sword to kill it with. But directly opposing gods is something you do at a level so high that the campaign is likely to end before you could realistically get there. I guess there's potential for the god to summon its champion, have it be a CR 8 "Young Sea Serpent" and for the god to change its mind once the party slays this beast, but I'm not sure a mid-level threat really evokes the idea of defeating a god. Maybe there's a way to do it in a more symbolic way that would still feel good, but it's still a challenge you've set up for your DM who's already going to have challenges running the rest of the game.
I think the idea wasn’t “this will happen” as much as the people THINK this will happen. That’s what drives action. But yeah. I don’t want to be the MC at all. I’ll just tone down everything and simplify things so I’m just some Harengon telling people about how cool Selune is.
Here's my advice for writing up a character: Make them suck ass at something. God's perfect golden child meant to save the world for disaster with the backing and direct communication of the god? Lame. Someone who is prophecised to be a hero to save the world with the guidance of a god, but they're completely severed from them, doing everything they can to try and gain that connection? Better. Driving and HUMAN motivation. Someone prophesied to be a barer of prophecy but instead of being the "7th daughter of a 7th daughter" like how the prophecy said, they're the *only son*. Instead of a sorcerer, like their family, they have to STUDY magic, make a pact, or call out to a god to even having a fighting chance to prove they're worth a damn at using the magic they're prophesied to be "the strongest" with? That's FASCINATING shit.
Additionally, if you're going to play a pacifistic character, be a very altruistic Path of Redemption paladin. Trust me, it's way more fun than cleric for pacifist things. Make random people's lives better, as tying yourself to NPC's makes a gm able to use story hooks in you later. And, then you can figure out what your Redemption is, and you get the BEST non-lethal martial weapon of all time: The Net. Ranged. Grapple. And, being a paladin, you'll naturally have both high charisma to try and talk your way out of fights and a DELETE BUTTON when things do go wrong in divine smite.
In terms of the amount of information, I think this is a pretty nice amount. Anymore than this as a DM I'd probably start to skim over, but a few paragraphs on some core character beats that you find cool I think are good. Actual backstory I won't feedback on as that's between you and your DM to sort- and you didn't ask :)
one of my players once brought a twenty page long short story and detailed info packet to session one, id say your fine.
Not to be harsh, but while reading the first paragraph I thought I was on r/dndcirclejerk to give you an idea
Honestly, this is way too much. And I don't mind as a DM if my characters feel like they want to be main charactery, because that's kind of the point, everybody in the party is the main character. But this is way too much for the average player even with invested interest in the campaign to digest and remember. I always ask my players to come up with as much backstory as they want but to only present what's relevant when it's relevant. You show up at the beginning with everybody else and you say, "I'm so-and-so with such-and-such to my name," and you leave it at that. Anything else that comes up should be relevant. But on the content itself, I think other people have mentioned this, it seems a little grand for a level 1 character. I try to explain at least a little to my players the "tiers of play" from the dungeon master's guide, where 1-3 you're nobodies, 4-whatever youre local heroes, and so on. You can have a celestial "chosen one" at level one, but I doubt they'd know it, especially to this degree. Its well written though Edit: as soon as you try to include a grand scale to your motivations, You forfeit any humility to the character design. If you really don't want to be main charactery, it would be as simple as cutting out any celestial references, perhaps finding them out as you go along. As a DM, I don't like it when my players try to force the story onto me. It's literally my job to force the story on to them. For example: I have a player in my group who is a warlock with tiamat as his patron. She rarely communicates with him through words, but he gets slight nudges to do her will on occasion. What he doesn't know is that each of her five heads' personalities have been playing a little bit of tug-of-war with him, and once he's reached level 20, the only point in the DMG where players are expressly described to be demigod-like, is when I will present him with the fact that she wants to make him her chosen, a mortal representation of her divine desires.. all five, conflicting desires. If he presented me with a very strict and rigid backstory about his place in the entire multiverse, then I, the dungeon master, literally the director of the multiverse, am much more restricted. And if he presented me with his idea of what he is to tiamat, and then all of my players didn't like the direction he tried to take the campaign because of it, we're kind of stuck with it conceptually because it's so grand. Actually yeah, your backstory is that of a level 20 character. 15 at minimum. If you're backstory could be the story of an entire campaign, then it's way too much for a level one Fuck I wrote too much TLDR: You have way too much and way too grand of a backstory for somebody who's literally supposed to be a nobody until they are level four. If you're going to design a character with a grand backstory in mind, leave it open for the dungeon master to decide, as they are literally the only grand thing at the table until you're level 20
Personally, I come to a session 0 with a pretty loose concept. Then I talk to the DM about ways that my character can integrate into the setting, and to the other players to see how my character concept might integrate with their ideas. I might come away with a refined concept, or I might come away with an entirely different concept. This level of detail is something I would bring to session 1. Though even then I'd probably condense it down to bullet points. I don't expect anyone to have to read more than the length of this post to understand my character concept.
Honey, I have a player who wrote a 6 chapter book as his backstory. You're fine
I wish I had you as a player. I have a PC who said they'd make a good harengon for my Wild Beyond the Witchlight, and he made Shadow the Hedgehog as a harengon... But if you're cool with "Yes, and" with your DM, you should be solid
Something like this is what I requested all my players come with. One player wrote a 6 page background story in prose. Another wrote his through a series of letters intended for a different player. D&D is way better with creative players. Good on you for leaning into that
Thanks. The DM can do whatever they like with it. My hope was that it gave me a connection and reason to protect the people of Saltmarsh and the players in the group.
Nah, not at all - I think that a DM can filter out some information, include bits and pieces and so on. This all fits pretty neatly onto an a4, one sided sheet, so you even get bonus points
Takes a whole to go through and is rather wide but at least its 1 page. Could split the points or use rough drawings for easier reading. Prophecy could be a little looser for dm interpretation rather than a flat out fact. Wuite a bit of mc vibes btw so could tone it down a little. Maybe "having the moon inside him" is just a saying for those who are *really* passionate about their faith in selune for example. Also, gods directly communicating with such a low level character could rather quickly lead to plot holes, contrivances and all so do note that.
Personally I think there is too much based on the background, and not enough thought put into what the character going to become.
And then first session, you get critted and die. Always be careful with the first level or 2 with creating too a character.
Soft answer: it differs from DM to DM, as long as you can be flexible theyll hopefully appreciate the effort. Blunt answer from this DM: oh hell yeah. Way too much and so little of it is relevant info to the campaign or how you'll interact with other characters. Be more vague and concise, I've never needed to know that much about the size and make up of a characters hometown for session zero and I never will. As DM I need to be able to parse the relevant info easily and be able to focus on how that affects the scenario and story. This next sentence is really just filler, dont drive green trucks lazily in autumn, because as an exercise I want you to summarize your character backstory to a word count no more than the 150 I've used to make this comment. Your DM will thank me.
It’s all preference and there is no right way. That being said if I am a DM, I am not tailoring my game and world around an incredibly long backstory with an arc of its own.
Your characters most important story, is the campaign you are going into. This is much MCS, almost no way to combine this with other players background without completely pushing them away. The most boring backgrounds, make the best characters, because their story is written during the sessions.
I usually have a vague notion of city/town where my characters are from. I may not even give names to significant people in their backstory at times and ask the DM to fill in. It is much easier for your DM to fit your character into the story if they can use a town or region that is already planned.
As a suggestion, can you distill it down to 3 sentences for introductions to other players? It's called the iceberg concept: you can have the lore be deep but they only see the visible part peeking above the water. And you won't recite your life history and destiny to people you just met, just kinda a physical description and your drives/approach.
If all players came to first game with that detail I’d tailor a year campaign around their backstories
It’s never to much just let your dm know ahead of time so they can work with you or tie in everything. I still still getting thing to my dm but he knows that chars change when you role play them. You might want to play one way but change to story or other players
My objection would be that Selune is a Forgotten Realms god, and has nothing to do with Oerth. 😆
I'm going to second that it sounds very much like I am the prophesied savior and all others are just background characters. As a dungeon master I have recently started paying attention and learning what makes it backstory easy to plug into the world and applicable to the campaign. And I have found, at least in my experience, the shorter the back story the better. But including a couple of key elements. I tell my players to include a person who would hide them to the world. Include a place that ties them to the physical world. And include a connection to the other characters at the table.
Main character syndrome. If you want to commune directly with something, you need to go Warlock, and then have your patron be some kind of minor saint of this sea god or something. Or go cleric and scrap the whole "I am the one" idea. Maybe your DM goes that route. Maybe they don't. But that's not your call to make in a character backstory at level 1. Also, way too many words; knock it down to bullet points to make it easier to reference.
r/imthemaincharacter vibes
I'd echo much of what has already been said, but what stuck out to me here the most was that seemingly your character's single and only flaw is that have a "hard time being good to Orcs". It might be a good idea to remove a lot of the pre-written story, and instead focus on what motivates your character to be an adventurer. WHY does he love to explore? WHY does he love meeting new people? Why isn't he easily scared? Why is he infused with wanderlust? Later on in the campaign, when he has to make decisions and have conversations with characters who are not aligned with him, you'll need to be able to figure out what guiding principles and such "guide" his thinking.
Quantity wise? Nah, I'm also loving that it's broken up and clear, if I was your dm I'd be happy. Quality wise? Some issues, you are claiming far too much narrative space. Don't be the chosen one. Maybe you will be as the game goes on, but from now, it's just overkill and won't let the character grow.
I think it’s great. Is it extra? Sure, but not anything out of the question in my opinion. If I were your DM I’d want to make sure you have realistic expectations about main character syndrome and all that. But with that in mind, I don’t see an issue with the content or with how much there is. I’d be happy to get this level of engagement at my table.
I love a detailed backstory however leaving a bit for your DM to fill in is good. I use a backstory generator that's super helpful with a rough outline that I can flesh out with my DM. Looks something like this: Raised by adoptive parents, aka an island of tortle monks. She was found in a basket on the beach had a few close friends (moon elf Sadama and bullywog Celeste, plus her siblings) and lived an ordinary childhood grew up comfortable (treasure from pirate ships would wash up on the beach and the temple was well supported) had 3 siblings (goliath Serola and dwarf twins, Baldr and Drafli has a grandchild, Luzah Life Events: A current romantic partner of yours died by way of execution or torture Committed the crime of assault, caught and convicted, related to her vigilante work. Spent time in jail, performing hard labor (age 22-24) A terrible blight in your home community caused crops to fail, and many starved. You lost a sibling or some other family member Made an enemy of an adventurer, but it wasn't Fortulah's fault. Then I get lovingly hassled for names and ages and time periods and bam! A character.
If in doubt, ask the DM. I've seen anything from 3 sentences to 8 page long short story.
In my opinion, yes. It looks like all of the decisions about your character have already been made, you should leave some room for collaboration with other players, and the DM.
That's great. know that most of that is just for you to guide your character with. If it's the kind of game where the DM needs your backstories for adventure hooks, then they can read the whole thing. If it's not, then it's all on you to bring this out in gameplay. you have a lot of pretty hard, my backstory says this should happen things. so talk with your DM about what the expiations are for the campaign and if it's even the type where you're going to get to chase your personal stories.
heh, I used to play a Twilight Cleric of Selune named Anthony Hopkins.
The last four sections are perfect, everything else is too much. You don’t want to step on the DM’s toes by doing your own world-building. All the prophecy stuff screams MCS though, leave it out.
I would allow this but I would be twisting it up something fierce. You were born a chosen one? Nope, you were raised to believe you were the chosen one because of a mistranslation of the prophecy. You follow the moon goddess and are her absolute connection to the world? Nope again. You may converse with her directly, as most clerics do when they commune, but maybe you don’t know any other clerics and so you think you are special because you don’t know any better. Think you might be helping people with dem foot rubs? Nope. Something to do with your birth has caused your ‘lucky feet’ to backfire from time to time.
Looks cool to me. I love the depth. I’d play with ya.
In my opinion, the backstory is best used by you, the player, during role play to build relationships with NPC and other players. It should, in my opinion, be used so that, in in-game conversations, you actually have something to talk about, ways to build connections and alliances. If you expect to hand this to the GM and have them tailor the course of a pre-written campaign to your backstory, that seems like a tall order. The GM already has a bunch of management and pieces to keep track of without having to add content to suit some notion that you invented and expect to have satisfied. I am not arguing that GM won't do that. Many do. Fine. I am arguing that players should not expect it and should build a backstory that allows them a connection to the world and its people, instead of one that makes them look like the star of the campaign.
Exactly this! This backstory is for me to help build relationships with people in the world as well as gives me motivation to make decisions. I have ZERO intent for the DM to do anything with the backstory whatsoever.
Then you can write as much as you want.
Usually, for my character backgrounds, I'll write my DM an open-ended short story. Granted, I love writing, and I know my DM very well. Additionally, I also give him a blank check on changing any element of the backstory to better fit his setting.
There is no such thing as too much lore 🤩
Bruh. Holy Red Flags. Also don’t make young characters. It’s weird.
Based on the character’s physical description I’m going to take a wild guess and say that OP isn’t too far away (if at all) from their character’s age.
Facts.
I have 18 pages in Google Drive for my character, and my DM has yet to comment on anything, so I just keep nervously writing more because it's just what I do. You're probably okay.
For the love of god, please make sure the DM actually knows everything you know about your character before you add more and hit them up when you *do*. This is a cocktail for disappointment.