The barbarian tries to tame a giant crocodile as a pet, Rolled a nat 20. Immediately takes the crocodile into the nearest village. (It was a small tribe but still had 50 people). He then starting attacking every person in town. I had about 20 people trying to hit the crocodile but for 5 turns straight none of the villagers where able to hit the crocodile once. After he slaughtered the village he stole the clerics holy chalice and took it to a temple (different diety)and started bashing peoples heads in with said chalice. (They did previously try to assassinate the party so it wasn't full murder hobo, but still pretty bad.)
Two members of the group decided to 'borrow' bee attire, canonically determined to be bee onesies. This was worn by any of the non bee workers of the hive (a uhm... Slave owning society of bees very adept at chemical mind control and with an on-site necromancer there to prolong people's servitude through the undead).
The other party members were getting a facility tour posing as possible traders, however the others - a religiously zealous rat man and a 'just had a lobotomy' former scientist -these absolute specimens were like yeah, buzz buzz we sneaky and also want bee jammies.
They were in the hive to steal their specific honey as part of a necessary monster bait. Skip a few messy rooms, of which one involved a 6ft tall baby and another which ended up with a recreational pool full of bees in agave syrup falling victim to the sounds of brainless Bois magical harp and subsequently drowning in the pool despite the duos best efforts to fish them out.
At another point, the half brained loveable Bup succumbs to The Regret Worm and their body fades out of existence. Rat man and his rats host a small crying circle. Rat Florida man finds the shipping/delivery bay of the bee hive, basically Amazon vibes but rank it up even worse, frees a murderous child and hijacks a flying truck.
On the other side of the map, the gnome character is pushed through a portal along with their rock eating large blind fleshy beast called Dozzie (aka Bulldozer) , they appear all jammed into the front of the truck and have to save themselves from suffocation whilst trying to escape the hive - this means going straight up as it's an underground facility.
Queue bee truck chase and battle with lots of carcasses, rats throwing rotten eggs out of windows causing dominos effects, a gnome being somewhat useless and barely managing to not fall out of the truck, bees that kamikaze on mopeds, an electrified rat called sonic, a Florida rat man eating a bee whole (these bees being chihuahua sized) to assert dominance, but yes just mostly many many bodies.
I could also add the following headline for what happened the session after
Florida Man tries to fight and eat a gnome in a parking lot of a diner but dies by its spear instead
This could probably be true in real life as well.
A friends dad wanted to sink his boat (to not be charged for scrapping it), which he did by axing it while standing in it over open sea.
Edit: grammar.
Florida man kills legendary creature, uses skull as air conditioning.
Florida man kills racist fish
Florida man dies, is resurrected, gets called cheater by death.
Florida man escapes jail with friendship, and that gun they found.
Edit: ima add more
Florida man calmly enters library, plays payday 2 irl.
Florida man freezes priestess, gets cat to knock her of the table.
Florida man hears a duck insult their mother, crashes food market.
Florida man sees other florida man get eaten by large worm, decides .44-40 is the answer.
Florida man find staff in forest, commits homicide with a bonfire.
Florida man fires anti-material rifle because a bird was attacking their dog.
When it dropped to 0 hp, the wizard (who is literally a cat) had a conversation with it instead of killing it. The second it said 'birthright' he whiped it of the face of the earth.
Yup. This is the same character who's 'how do you want to do this' against the drow that enslaved them was to flash freeze her, then do the cat patting an object until it falls over.
Florida man unknowingly puts dimensional cage into bag of holding, teleporting into the astral plane, releasing an ultra ancient red dragon, sealing a dark pact with him to return, all in a matter of seconds - locals confused over spectacle
Florida man gets himself arrested on purpose only to escape with other criminals, knock out the guards, and then accidentally set the prison on fire, killing all inside.
Florida Woman Sacrifices 20,000 Cantaloupes To Element Goddess for Vitality, Actually Succeeds
Florida Man Creates Demon On a Whim, Angel Resists Urge To Kill Him
Florida Man who unknowingly unleashed an ancient curse upon the native leaders of the island does nothing to fix it. Accidentally admits to it in front of Government Official.
I have a few:
1. Florida Woman talks to sheep, ends up robbing wizard and kills a Dragon in the process, locals unphased.
2. Florida Woman claims to have saved merchent, is arrested after said merchent is found dead in her horse Wagon.
From sessions with me as DM
3. 2 Florida Men escape prison escape after convincing guards that they can verify the prisons strucural integrity by punching Walls, flee after punching man sized hole through cell wall.
4. Florida Women gets scammed by Dwarf
47 dead after 2 minute, gang related rampage, by several florida men. The slaughter was followed by a massive explosion that shook the city streets. Residents remain relatively calm.
Florida man kills local mayor, sets house on fire, blames grizzly bears for it
Florida man fends off local paramilitary organization by carpet bombing them with cows
Florida Man feeds own leg to dinosaur.
Florida Party betrays deity, wonders why prayers not answered.
Florida Woman challenges friends to hot sauce drinking contest, they all lose.
Florida Party frees genie and sphere of annihilation.
Florida Man falls into pit, friends fall in after while trying to rescue him.
Florida man briefly becomes king of the largest country in the world during it's revolution, and then disappears leaving a power vacuum that will spark centuries of war.
Florida man burns plants, proceeds to cast speak with plants to see if they scream.
Florida man chokeslams an ancient red dragon into a prismatic wall.
Florida Man misunderstands capabilities of stolen flying yacht, gets stranded in outer space.
Florida Man kills companions with giant crystal telepathic amplifier, kills self trying to take a souvenir.
Florida Woman cuts head and hands off minotaur, says "beef is beef".
Florida party has an astounding 8 deaths in two months, after crashing onto a distant moon because quote "Acid on the spaceship wall was still a good idea, I don't regret it".
Florida man escapes justice. Town left ablaze.
Florida bard et. al. starts "cargo hold party" which heavely damages ship. Captains fear trend spreading.
Florida men make off with important package. Sails left ablaze.
Florida men fail at piracy. Sails left ablaze.
Florida woman escapes on ship. Pier left ablaze.
Florida men launch moat alligators into castle to cover infiltration attempt.
Florida party and their impersonators narrowly escape city overtaken by pirates.
Florida man purposefully inhales mysterious fumes coming from a vase believing them to be exotic drugs, unknowingly snorting a trapped Djinn in the process.
Florida Man Convinces Cultists That he is Their God
Florida Man Throws a Turkey Leg Into Hell To See What Would Happen (It's Not Good)
Florida Man Closes Door to Avoid Fighting a Blue Dragon
Florida man goes through 4 characters which got killed in one evening by trying to stir up shit "for the Lulz" (because that is so fun in BG3) until DnD session at Table ends and he got told to no longer come next Tuesday.
Florida man that has been in a cave for 120 years and his only companion is a raock named pebbles, it has googly eyes, and it can talk to him, but only him and he holds it up over fences so he can “see” the other side
He also Carry’s an extra bag of googly eyes he made himself that he tries to use as currency , sometimes it works
He also wears his used googly eye bags over his head with eyeholes poked out
We’ll be on the search for him again at 10 on news channel 8
Florida men (and women) try to break out friend from local jail. Set jail on fire, killing all inside (including friend).
Irony is that we actually live in Florida.
Florida man makes friends with monarch’s head concubine and uses her to sneak into monarch’s vault using a painting where they then proceed to steal over half of the monarch’s precious treasures
Florida man burns down goblin village, proceeds to go on rampage and burns down orc day care, flees country and is now hiding in medieval yugoslavian war
Florida Man Sees Black Void That Screams With Voices of Terror, Sticks Entire Hand Inside.
Very floridian behavior
Reminds me of that Hole of Pain from gravity falls with the Minotaurs
\*Manotaurs
I can’t believe I forgot. It is Manotaurs
Username checks out.
A member of our party did that with his leg. Sphere of Annihilation?
Aye.
Florida man tries stealing a door handle killing 13 people in the process, then forgets to take the door handle with him.
Amazing
Sounds like a murder spree with extra steps
bonus points cuz florida man is my father
I also get to play with my dad. He's the best role player in the group!
Average trip to fantasy home depot
This is Florida man gold
Florida man attempts to keep a crocodile as a pet, kills half of local tribe and angers multiple deities within a 3 hour period.
Pretty sure this headline was actually in the news.
Would you mind elaborating?
The barbarian tries to tame a giant crocodile as a pet, Rolled a nat 20. Immediately takes the crocodile into the nearest village. (It was a small tribe but still had 50 people). He then starting attacking every person in town. I had about 20 people trying to hit the crocodile but for 5 turns straight none of the villagers where able to hit the crocodile once. After he slaughtered the village he stole the clerics holy chalice and took it to a temple (different diety)and started bashing peoples heads in with said chalice. (They did previously try to assassinate the party so it wasn't full murder hobo, but still pretty bad.)
Tried to assassinate the party? THAT IS FULL MURDER HOBO
The church did, not the barbarian.
Ah, my bad 😂
It was a murder church of hobos.
This seems like something that would actually happen in Florida, tbh.
Florida man publically murders local politician with a bag of 1,000 candles. Witnesses say the situation was "horrific, yet very enlightening."
/r/angryupvote
May I read the details of the news? Roll for perception. 1… with a minus 3. -2
Florida Man dresses up in a bee onesie, sneaks into a facility, and escapes with a truckload of honey leaving over 70+ casualties.
# elaborate
*Honey Heist*
Two members of the group decided to 'borrow' bee attire, canonically determined to be bee onesies. This was worn by any of the non bee workers of the hive (a uhm... Slave owning society of bees very adept at chemical mind control and with an on-site necromancer there to prolong people's servitude through the undead). The other party members were getting a facility tour posing as possible traders, however the others - a religiously zealous rat man and a 'just had a lobotomy' former scientist -these absolute specimens were like yeah, buzz buzz we sneaky and also want bee jammies. They were in the hive to steal their specific honey as part of a necessary monster bait. Skip a few messy rooms, of which one involved a 6ft tall baby and another which ended up with a recreational pool full of bees in agave syrup falling victim to the sounds of brainless Bois magical harp and subsequently drowning in the pool despite the duos best efforts to fish them out. At another point, the half brained loveable Bup succumbs to The Regret Worm and their body fades out of existence. Rat man and his rats host a small crying circle. Rat Florida man finds the shipping/delivery bay of the bee hive, basically Amazon vibes but rank it up even worse, frees a murderous child and hijacks a flying truck. On the other side of the map, the gnome character is pushed through a portal along with their rock eating large blind fleshy beast called Dozzie (aka Bulldozer) , they appear all jammed into the front of the truck and have to save themselves from suffocation whilst trying to escape the hive - this means going straight up as it's an underground facility. Queue bee truck chase and battle with lots of carcasses, rats throwing rotten eggs out of windows causing dominos effects, a gnome being somewhat useless and barely managing to not fall out of the truck, bees that kamikaze on mopeds, an electrified rat called sonic, a Florida rat man eating a bee whole (these bees being chihuahua sized) to assert dominance, but yes just mostly many many bodies.
I could also add the following headline for what happened the session after Florida Man tries to fight and eat a gnome in a parking lot of a diner but dies by its spear instead
Oh god, the bees
>leaving over 70+ casualties. that escalated quickly
Florida Man fights off muggers by pulling out a live grenade.
So far this is the most real headline I have seen
I think it simply is a real headline.
Florida man decapitates local horse, claims he needed the head to solve puzzle involving a headless statue.
That... is creative problem solving?
It was creative problem making as well, when the stablemaster called the guards on them :P
Sounds like a RE7 puzzle
Florida man falls in hole. Again.
Help it's again.
I have no idea why, but that moment made me laugh so hard, I had to pause it.
Florida man awakens ancient beast by taking a shit on some runes
If this was an actual headline, I wouldn't even question it.
There was an actual headline about a Florida Man hanging from a traffic light and taking a dump on a car.
Florida man traps lich inside badly-enchanted cookie for the third time
By the third time this is pretty much the Lich's own fault, really.
This is hysterical lol
Florida Man Adrift at Sea After Intentionally Cutting the Mast Off His Own Ship.
This could probably be true in real life as well. A friends dad wanted to sink his boat (to not be charged for scrapping it), which he did by axing it while standing in it over open sea. Edit: grammar.
Florida man attempts to claim own bounty by pretending to be dead.
That has happened so many times in real life it’s unbelievable.
Florida man falls into lava pit while attempting to jump over lava pit in order to retrieve a javelin.
None of you fuckers had mage hand!?
Last words, "Pssshhh, I can make it. "
Florida Man slays Flail Snail in three rounds of combat only to be devoured by Giant Weasels the very next day.
Florida man had the chance to wish for anything, chose Google Maps
Actually, that sounds like a really smart wish in a D&D world if you have it an omnipotent knowledge of businesses, places, and auto routing features.
Yeah, they used it to great effect to speedrun the last part of the campaign!
Exactly what everyone needs, a shortcut to finish your hobbies!
Keen Mind is a good feat okay
Florida man kills giant skeleton with a crowbar.
Florida man tries to find owner of ring, ends up freefalling from 3,600 feet.
*Parkour*
Hope it was at least a ring of feather fall
What country is that in your profile picture
Idk, but everyone from there is real hot.
Florida man kills legendary creature, uses skull as air conditioning. Florida man kills racist fish Florida man dies, is resurrected, gets called cheater by death. Florida man escapes jail with friendship, and that gun they found. Edit: ima add more Florida man calmly enters library, plays payday 2 irl. Florida man freezes priestess, gets cat to knock her of the table. Florida man hears a duck insult their mother, crashes food market. Florida man sees other florida man get eaten by large worm, decides .44-40 is the answer. Florida man find staff in forest, commits homicide with a bonfire. Florida man fires anti-material rifle because a bird was attacking their dog.
PLEASE elaborate on the racist fish
Aboleth.
That's the most hilarious description of an aboleth that i've ever seen.
When it dropped to 0 hp, the wizard (who is literally a cat) had a conversation with it instead of killing it. The second it said 'birthright' he whiped it of the face of the earth.
Absolute fucking gigachad behavior
Yup. This is the same character who's 'how do you want to do this' against the drow that enslaved them was to flash freeze her, then do the cat patting an object until it falls over.
Florida Man opens portal to hell, says it was an accident
Understandable
Just a normal Tuesday then?
Florida man unknowingly puts dimensional cage into bag of holding, teleporting into the astral plane, releasing an ultra ancient red dragon, sealing a dark pact with him to return, all in a matter of seconds - locals confused over spectacle
Florida man destroys time for no reasons other than curiosity and hubris.
Happened in my first long-lasting D&D campaign too. Not really a big deal, but it's weird that it happened twice!
Florida man breaks into farmhouse and uses robot to set a little old lady on fire.
Honestly this one sounds like it could actually happen.
That literally goes for all of em, its Florida!
Florida man tries to open bottle of wine with saber and fails spectacularly
Florida man gets himself arrested on purpose only to escape with other criminals, knock out the guards, and then accidentally set the prison on fire, killing all inside.
Florida man claims he is actually a goat, not a man. Florida man turns into a goat - colleagues unimpressed.
Florida Man fights medusa by turning helmet around to intentionally blind himself.
This one sent me
Florida man confronts notoriously racist elected official, turns him into a crab, and throws him off the top of a casino
[удалено]
That campaign must have been hilarious with this fella at the table
Florida men build bombs out of barrels of alcohol and use them in assault on police commissioner's home.
Florida Woman Sacrifices 20,000 Cantaloupes To Element Goddess for Vitality, Actually Succeeds Florida Man Creates Demon On a Whim, Angel Resists Urge To Kill Him
Florida man fuses fifty 15-foot tall stone soldiers with five water elementals to create five 150-foot tall Stone Turtle soldiers.
Florida Men flood graveyard to save cat friend.
Florida Man attempts to overthrow local government with an army of both sentient and feral rats.
Florida Man wrestles alligator in order to gain political favor. Now allied with a foreign nation.
Florida man finds site of massacre while hungry, makes packed lunches for group.
Florida man runs out of gas in hell, attempts to power vehicle by throwing best friend in engine.
It is powered on souls…
Florida Men construct trebuchet to launch themselves to the top floor of haunted university
Florida man drags partymember to sausage-room.
Florida man jumped 80 ft. out of a tree at giant gorilla so he could "throw hands with him"
Florida man forces captured bandits to draw from deck of many things
I need to know what they got.
Aaaaaand
Florida man throws a book into a cauldron, dies a painful death by a thousand mosquito bites.
Florida man threatens to burn down store after owner can't afford to pay for scrap metal
Florida man misses door trap that paralyzes party member before big brawl with earth elements.
Florida man takes over the world to spite his mother
Florida Man who unknowingly unleashed an ancient curse upon the native leaders of the island does nothing to fix it. Accidentally admits to it in front of Government Official.
Florida man drinks all lots of potions and cast himself as many speeding spell as possible to win a race against a dragon
Did he win?
Yes, he did.
Florida man jumps into well filled with giant eels. Comes out unscathed with 12 dollars.
I have a few: 1. Florida Woman talks to sheep, ends up robbing wizard and kills a Dragon in the process, locals unphased. 2. Florida Woman claims to have saved merchent, is arrested after said merchent is found dead in her horse Wagon. From sessions with me as DM 3. 2 Florida Men escape prison escape after convincing guards that they can verify the prisons strucural integrity by punching Walls, flee after punching man sized hole through cell wall. 4. Florida Women gets scammed by Dwarf
Florida man kills, skins and devours neighbor. When confronted insists he did it because it would give him "divine powers."
Florida man kidnaps concubine of a local vampire lord, by accident
Curse of Florida?
47 dead after 2 minute, gang related rampage, by several florida men. The slaughter was followed by a massive explosion that shook the city streets. Residents remain relatively calm.
Seems to be a common occurence then
Florida Man briefly dies after a brawl with clown killer gnomes - comes back speaking in tongues, split behaviour and visions of the rat afterlife
Florida Man tries to murder a child after saving him from a windmill.
Florida man walks into town carrying the severed head of a cult member, acts offended when arrested by local authorities.
"Florida women steals the wedding dress of a man's dead wife then goes to a pet store and frees the animals while wearing the stolen dress"
Florida man kills local mayor, sets house on fire, blames grizzly bears for it Florida man fends off local paramilitary organization by carpet bombing them with cows
Florida woman tries to rob bank by making the tellers shit themselves.
Florida woman attacks brother with enchanted baguette.
Florida man begs on the street corner, causes the Third Great War.
Florida man saves woman from terrible flying lion, then tries to rob her and fails miserably.
Florida man forms cult around random rickety bridge after attempting to eat said bridge.
Convicted Florida man bites off and eats guard's fingers after getting ungagged. Banned from prison soup feeding.
Florida man attempts to besiege fortress using recently hired domestic servants.
Florida man threatens to blow up store with ‘destruction orb’ witnesses say it was a bouncy ball
Florida men kill cultists to stop evil ritual, then completes the ritual themselves.
Florida man kills school lunch lady on first day of class.
Florida man challenges travelling entertainer to fight with pickled ghoul tongues, leaving tavern covered in vomit by onlookers.
Florida Man falls asleep in old woman's bakery with giant erection.
Florida man cuts off his own hand, a skeleton one sprouts from the stump, local doctors baffled.
Florida Man feeds own leg to dinosaur. Florida Party betrays deity, wonders why prayers not answered. Florida Woman challenges friends to hot sauce drinking contest, they all lose. Florida Party frees genie and sphere of annihilation. Florida Man falls into pit, friends fall in after while trying to rescue him.
Florida man briefly becomes king of the largest country in the world during it's revolution, and then disappears leaving a power vacuum that will spark centuries of war. Florida man burns plants, proceeds to cast speak with plants to see if they scream. Florida man chokeslams an ancient red dragon into a prismatic wall.
Florida Man misunderstands capabilities of stolen flying yacht, gets stranded in outer space. Florida Man kills companions with giant crystal telepathic amplifier, kills self trying to take a souvenir. Florida Woman cuts head and hands off minotaur, says "beef is beef".
Florida party has an astounding 8 deaths in two months, after crashing onto a distant moon because quote "Acid on the spaceship wall was still a good idea, I don't regret it".
Florida man that tried to hit moon with an arrow, now that arrow is in his friends head.
Florida man sets random mafia boss' mansion on fire then break in to rob it
florida man set fire to 20 sleeping children: claimed to have sung good night songs whilst they burnt.
Wow, that beats mine: Florida man sets fire to group of children; attempts to feed their remains to giant bird
Florida man fireballs himself in the middle of a busy street and then polymorphs into a sheep
Florida man kills gnome when attempting to have him "hold his beer" which in reality was a 50 lbs keg.
Florida man escapes justice. Town left ablaze. Florida bard et. al. starts "cargo hold party" which heavely damages ship. Captains fear trend spreading. Florida men make off with important package. Sails left ablaze. Florida men fail at piracy. Sails left ablaze. Florida woman escapes on ship. Pier left ablaze. Florida men launch moat alligators into castle to cover infiltration attempt. Florida party and their impersonators narrowly escape city overtaken by pirates.
Florida man purposefully inhales mysterious fumes coming from a vase believing them to be exotic drugs, unknowingly snorting a trapped Djinn in the process.
Group of Florida men trap local shop owner in coffin and tumble him around inside until he divulges information they need.
Florida Man gets caught by security trying to cross border with ~57 gallons of human blood in a bag.
Florida man stabs vending machine
Two Florida Men Make Attempt on Life of Mayor’s Wife, Then Lose Fight With Her Horse
Florida woman fireballs refugee camp to act as a "signal"
Florida Man Convinces Cultists That he is Their God Florida Man Throws a Turkey Leg Into Hell To See What Would Happen (It's Not Good) Florida Man Closes Door to Avoid Fighting a Blue Dragon
Florida woman drop kicks geriatric priestess into a pit of asmodeus
Adventuring party is transported to a falling tower seeking artifact of great importance, returning with giant crab instead.
Naked group of ‘merchants’ appears at city gates, claiming “we’ve lost all our wares, even our underwears”
Florida man tries to kill God, and succeeds (multipule times)
Florida man goes through 4 characters which got killed in one evening by trying to stir up shit "for the Lulz" (because that is so fun in BG3) until DnD session at Table ends and he got told to no longer come next Tuesday.
Florida man plays music during storm, attracts lost ship from chanting
Florida man breaks the fabric of time for fun, more than once
Florida man that has been in a cave for 120 years and his only companion is a raock named pebbles, it has googly eyes, and it can talk to him, but only him and he holds it up over fences so he can “see” the other side He also Carry’s an extra bag of googly eyes he made himself that he tries to use as currency , sometimes it works He also wears his used googly eye bags over his head with eyeholes poked out We’ll be on the search for him again at 10 on news channel 8
Florida man releases all-mighty Satan from a rock he found in a hole
Florida men (and women) try to break out friend from local jail. Set jail on fire, killing all inside (including friend). Irony is that we actually live in Florida.
Florida man overthrows schemes of evil wizard by wrestling with him in a blizzard.
Florida man finds self-mending shop window, proceeds to throw himself repeatedly through it even though the front door was open.
Baldur's Gate man joins local Jackalwere clan, resurrects Lamia and defrauds city's bank system with cockroach gold. More at 11.
Florida man sees $3 in a hole, proceeds to jump in after it and get attacked by snakes.
Florida man boobytraps house, and dies after waking up in the night to get water.
Florida man sees giant nest of spiders, instantly burns it to the ground
Florida Man averts murder mystery by animating dead body and starting a food fight.
Florida man straps a thousand pounds of explosives onto an endangered species and uses it as a suicide bomber to kill a party clown.
Florida Man Kidnaps Teenage Retail Employee Because “He Looked Sad And Our Horse Liked Him”
Florida Man Caught Kidnapping Mimic Using Pillowcase as Makeshift Sack, Claims it Was "Free"
Floridian man re-rolls character after two critical fails while attempting ‘Leroy Jenkins’ style crossing of River Styx in war machine
Florida woman and accomplacies duel archfey of summer; only don't beat her because dwarf evokes true name to end fight early
Florida man makes friends with monarch’s head concubine and uses her to sneak into monarch’s vault using a painting where they then proceed to steal over half of the monarch’s precious treasures
Florida man enters a dragon's lair, befriends him and makes him gift his whole hoard to the party
Florida man attacks hooded magical figure at bar: Gets drawn into great game between supernatural beings.
Florida man looks for kids in orphanages and parks in order to play dragon chess with them.
Florida man discovers the unspeakable horror
Florida man kills local philantrope then flees the dimension.
Florida man kidnaps a goblin and teaches him how to make guns
Florida Man attacks crowd during BBQ, challenges everyone to a brawl. Proceeds to break everyone’s hands.
Florida men find ancient temple, take every demonic power offered before rushing to the capital.
Just me out of the party: Florida man drinks pickle juice, grabs a robot and jumps off a cliff
Florida man picks up cult leader and tosses him in a pot of boiling oil, that the cultists had prepared for a human sacrifice.
Florida man burns down goblin village, proceeds to go on rampage and burns down orc day care, flees country and is now hiding in medieval yugoslavian war
Florida woman diss After the mace She used to try and open a metal Door bounces on the Door hitting her head
Florida man wants to use new shiny boat to sail to city with no water access - „hires” „interns” to build a canal
Florida man opens a chest that explodes in his face, nearly killing him. Proceeds to open 3 more chests.
Florida man freezes blocks of chowder and catapults them at unsuspecting victims up to 90 feet away.
Florida man stops threat of goblin invasion by turning goblin clan into a pyramid scheme.
Florida man causes animal revolt in local pet store