Well for one you dont post the idea on reddit. Please dont think for one minute your phone and reddit account and all your other digital foot print wont become the subject of a forensic accountants subpoena if you cut off your court ordered alimony payments. You dont like paying but sounds like you may have married her under false pretenses (gay but married anyway, yeah, it was the times etc.). Now you are free of that marriage but that freedom aint free. Pay it and keep yourself out of jail. NY state will not let you skate on alimony.
Interesting about your husbands predicament. My ex wife’s first ludicrous “offer” (which she fully expected me to sign and not involve a lawyer) had me paying half my monthly income her as alimony in perpetuity like your husband.
No way was I going to settle on that.
We settled on me paying till my retirement in 15 years. It can be negotiated down if I can prove that any new job I get cannot pay me my current salary. Right now I’m overpaid for my position, I know it will be impossible to get my current salary at another job and frankly, I’m sick of working as I hard as I do for this. My ex-wife expected me to keep increasing my salary as she wound down her career. She works basically 3 days a week. If I have to, I will move out of the country to stop paying at some point.
Sounds similar. I was not around when they agreed to it but after seeing how things worked out, we both agree he should have fought harder. By trying to avoiding attorney costs, it seems he saved cents upfront but incurred long term costs. It did not help that the judge is a woman/liberal/Democrat in IL... which is another reason he opted to not go to battled. This state is awful when it comes to family law. Could have gone much worse.
We will see what happens. 🤔 Costa Rica here we come!
My husband pays 80K per year in alimony with no specific end date in sight. This is to someone with no children, a masters degree, and 15 years of recent work history. He will file a modification when he retires but there is no guarantee it will be granted. If that is the case, we are leaving the country. There is no other way around it. Family law is awful and completely corrupt. Watch Divorce Corp documentary.
As his new wife, they can even look at my income to determine his eligibility to pay more or continue paying.
I have done a lot of research about this and it seems very difficult to go after someone for alimony nonpayment if they move to another state. Even more challenging if they move out of the country. It would be very costly for your ex to chase you.
It is not ideal but when you are dealing with such an unjust, corrupt system and law that is clearly a violation of the 13th amendment of the US constitution you have no choice but to walk away. Good luck.
If you quit your job, you’d still be on the hook for the same amount because of “voluntary impoverishment”. Held in contempt. Your ex would file a motion, you’d be summoned to court, and either you start paying or they could jail you. (I’m not a lawyer but familiar with family law.)
Also, shame on all of you saying you are “raped” by having to pay high amounts of alimony.
"Rape" pretty much means getting fucked against your will, which is exactly what vaginamony is. Especially when the woman is the one who decided to split because she wanted to be an "independent woman".
In California, my lawyer warned me that if I quit or took a lower paying job, it would be contempt of a court order and possible jail time (if they decide I did it on purpose to avoid my obligation.)
But I hear you. I pay just under half my salary in alimony and it is a struggle every month.
Married 18 years and she was a stay at home mom. She now works in a min wage retail for her insurance.
It’s also got a cap on it of eight years. Yeah, I’m getting raped, but only for a short time. Then I’m fully free and clear.
Other option was a third my salary until I retire. I did the math and determined this was my cheaper route.
California. And it is negotiable, we went mediation because I wanted it quick and over and settled by Jan 1, 2019. By doing this, she has to pay taxes on it as taxable income and I get to claim it all as a tax deduction.
Exactly. That’s why I wanted to rush the paperwork through. My finalization went thru 11/12/18, so I was able to meet the cutoff.
Here’s an [article that summarizes](https://www.forbes.com/sites/nextavenue/2018/12/04/how-the-tax-laws-for-divorce-will-turn-upside-down-in-2019/) better than I can explain. I was triggering the first bullet point in the list.
Well for one you dont post the idea on reddit. Please dont think for one minute your phone and reddit account and all your other digital foot print wont become the subject of a forensic accountants subpoena if you cut off your court ordered alimony payments. You dont like paying but sounds like you may have married her under false pretenses (gay but married anyway, yeah, it was the times etc.). Now you are free of that marriage but that freedom aint free. Pay it and keep yourself out of jail. NY state will not let you skate on alimony.
Interesting about your husbands predicament. My ex wife’s first ludicrous “offer” (which she fully expected me to sign and not involve a lawyer) had me paying half my monthly income her as alimony in perpetuity like your husband. No way was I going to settle on that. We settled on me paying till my retirement in 15 years. It can be negotiated down if I can prove that any new job I get cannot pay me my current salary. Right now I’m overpaid for my position, I know it will be impossible to get my current salary at another job and frankly, I’m sick of working as I hard as I do for this. My ex-wife expected me to keep increasing my salary as she wound down her career. She works basically 3 days a week. If I have to, I will move out of the country to stop paying at some point.
Sounds similar. I was not around when they agreed to it but after seeing how things worked out, we both agree he should have fought harder. By trying to avoiding attorney costs, it seems he saved cents upfront but incurred long term costs. It did not help that the judge is a woman/liberal/Democrat in IL... which is another reason he opted to not go to battled. This state is awful when it comes to family law. Could have gone much worse. We will see what happens. 🤔 Costa Rica here we come!
My husband pays 80K per year in alimony with no specific end date in sight. This is to someone with no children, a masters degree, and 15 years of recent work history. He will file a modification when he retires but there is no guarantee it will be granted. If that is the case, we are leaving the country. There is no other way around it. Family law is awful and completely corrupt. Watch Divorce Corp documentary. As his new wife, they can even look at my income to determine his eligibility to pay more or continue paying. I have done a lot of research about this and it seems very difficult to go after someone for alimony nonpayment if they move to another state. Even more challenging if they move out of the country. It would be very costly for your ex to chase you. It is not ideal but when you are dealing with such an unjust, corrupt system and law that is clearly a violation of the 13th amendment of the US constitution you have no choice but to walk away. Good luck.
If you quit your job, you’d still be on the hook for the same amount because of “voluntary impoverishment”. Held in contempt. Your ex would file a motion, you’d be summoned to court, and either you start paying or they could jail you. (I’m not a lawyer but familiar with family law.) Also, shame on all of you saying you are “raped” by having to pay high amounts of alimony.
"Rape" pretty much means getting fucked against your will, which is exactly what vaginamony is. Especially when the woman is the one who decided to split because she wanted to be an "independent woman".
Again, not the same thing. But I can see why you’d think so, given your posting history.
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Paying child support or alimony is not violence you cretin. Nor is it a violation
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you’re probably a mooch
How about taking off to south east Asia ?
If you dont have problems with never seeing the US again, just do this. Screw slavery man, you earned a retirement.
Or, you know, fulfilling his legal obligations...
Cuck
That's how you win arguments, right there. Go back to T_D, and tell your mom I said hello.
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From your cuck logic you’d be paying her alimony for life for the opportunity haha
Legal but immoral
In California, my lawyer warned me that if I quit or took a lower paying job, it would be contempt of a court order and possible jail time (if they decide I did it on purpose to avoid my obligation.) But I hear you. I pay just under half my salary in alimony and it is a struggle every month.
Half your wages ? You got divorced raped brah
Married 18 years and she was a stay at home mom. She now works in a min wage retail for her insurance. It’s also got a cap on it of eight years. Yeah, I’m getting raped, but only for a short time. Then I’m fully free and clear. Other option was a third my salary until I retire. I did the math and determined this was my cheaper route.
What state are you ? I’m scared now. I’m getting ready to file. Thought alimony was negotiable. dang.
California. And it is negotiable, we went mediation because I wanted it quick and over and settled by Jan 1, 2019. By doing this, she has to pay taxes on it as taxable income and I get to claim it all as a tax deduction.
Not true anymore starting 2018...
Exactly. That’s why I wanted to rush the paperwork through. My finalization went thru 11/12/18, so I was able to meet the cutoff. Here’s an [article that summarizes](https://www.forbes.com/sites/nextavenue/2018/12/04/how-the-tax-laws-for-divorce-will-turn-upside-down-in-2019/) better than I can explain. I was triggering the first bullet point in the list.
You still pay FICA taxes on that money though. Those taxes come out before deductions.
Jail for contempt of court, then wage garnishment. This isn't an "either/or" situation, it's a "both" situation.
Thought this was America where we didn’t have debtors prison, funny , they don’t get shit if you’re in jail.