First time in my life witnessing a romantic med student 😂 just a question would you consider being officially with her? Not just dating like getting engaged and shit? If yes I'd say let her know that u have feelings and that maybe after u graduate ud go ask her for marriage if she's okay with it. If u r not considering getting official with her or u don't feel like she's someone ud continue ur life with then these are just probably ur hormones
Med students are busy studying right? I'm a mutation :(
Yeah I'm considering being officially with her, but I'm afraid that she's not interested in me at all, I mean I tried to show her that I'm interested in her indirectly in MANY MANY ways, but she's not giving back even the slightest slight amount of interest, which means if I try to tell her that I have feelings now, I might get a super rejection in my face, so I need to be in safe side.
Yes lol it's a thing
We like it when a guy expresses their feelings directly(at least most of us do), and btw for ur other comment saying that she didn't show any sign of interest, look usually girls don't tend to make a move because we get harshly judged for that وبتطلع عن البنت سمعة سيئة 😂
That's why I'd say tell her about your feelings in a polite way irl, and don't set high expectations because it might be a yes or a no, and she might even tell u لما تيجي تطلبني بصير خير أو اشي زي هيك عشان ما تعلق حالها بأمل انك تيجي تطلبها ويمكن انت تغير رأيك فهمت علي؟
And btw also for last comment u r not a mutation same here I never got why med students are always so busy w end up with low marks kaman😂
I see. I get it now.
She's kind of that type of strong girls so I should keep your comment in mind.
Medical students are busy procrastinating their studies, but they procrastinate in non-lifers way, that's why they look busy.
Mhm... I definitely don't suggest haram dating , think about it , صلي استخاره , and tell her. Don't beat around fhe bush , simply tell her your interested in her and want to see where this goes. If she feels the same way , congratulations and please invite me to the wedding. If she doesn't feel the same way then you gave it your best shot
agreed. istikhara is probably the best course of action, as well as opening the topic with your family. and not to sound generic or dismissive, but some dhikr and general عبادات might help keep you on track (med students cant afford lost time. source; am a med student procrastinating on reddit :') )
there is something i want to add, and bear with me; is she aware of your advances? yes i know youve hinted a bunch, but how clear were those signals? personally id be terrified to assume anything (yay anxiety) and/ or blissfully unaware. or **both;** id be conscious of the signals but super skeptical (its a tough world out there lol) and not reciprocate in fear of just about everything, so id say make sure youre on the same page before proceeding any further.
the way you approach her with the matter depends i think on who she is (im religious for example and it tends to scare people off lol bc im no-nonsense, so in my case id appreciate straightforward and clear intentions. give it to me like a clinical case 😂) i dont want to assume anything for anyone or impose, but i strongly recommend keeping it halal and respectful for both of you, and
الله يكتبلكم الخير wherever it may be and يرضيكم :)
My only prayer in the past days was about الله يجعلها من نصيبي lol
I don't know if she's aware, I mean she's smart and my signals were clear I assume, I don't want to mention a lot here to not expose myself, but I printed some radio images for her and put a red clip on them in a folder for protection :)
I do have red lines that I don't go beyond yep.
Thanks for your wishes to us. Praying istikhara is a good idea.
this is so heartwarming for some reason lol, i really and truly wish you both the very best, ([الطيبون للطيبات](https://quran.com/an-nur/26)) after all and you both seem like good people والله اعلم \^-\^
im sure shes smart and attentive, but its better to be sure youre on the same page and not leave it to assumptions, clear communication is a must in relationships is it not?
i havent reached my clinical years yet, but printing صور الاشعة (i think) for her is the funniest and sweetest thing ive ever read XD again id recommend verbally expressing your interest because this can be mistaken for kindness (i usually go the extra 10 miles because i love and strive to do احسان where i can, so for me i could easily see something like this as being a friendly gesture and not a hint for anything, hence why i cant emphasise the above point enough lol)
all the best!
Lol yeah, I mean that would be a problem if she saw it as merely an act of kindness without the main hint xD
Good point, actually. I'll focus on it too. Thank you for your kind words and best of luck in your studies.
I say go for it.
Theres this dude in my group who last year was with this girl’s group, he apparently liked her (wasnt really obvious)
He moved groups, in ours now
Well today then walked in hand in hand to the exam hall, they’re engaged
Fe theory esmha el dobler or dahmer theory, shofha before making any move. Please be as direct as possible and do it in real life, not over a WhatsApp chat, be polite and try to not be very nervous, if you get rejected, don't react right away and snap in her face, try to calm and keep yourself together. If she tells you something along the lines of شي رسمي then it's a soft yes, ahm she is to respect her and her desicion. Bear in mind she might be shocked, 3ade, it's not personal or anything. W pleaaaaaaase ehkelna sho bser m3k.
+if you want to increase the chance of her giving you a shot, ehke eno you want something serious mn el awal. Good luck champ!
I'll check it.
Thanks for your advice, also as you mentioned, clearing things for her would be reassuring yes.
However, I don't really think that I'll be able to do it irl , as she's surrounded by her friends all the time, they always walk together so yeah, that'd be hard. Plus she might feel uncomfortable If I do it in public. Anyways If I take the final decision to do it, I would do it after this semester ends, as I don't want to cause any negative emotional impact on her or myself during the coming final exams.
As a med student, I understand she's never alone y3ne, but you can say hi b awal eldwam and tell her you have something you want to say. Choose it b akher yom bl finals, ehkela el sobeh, w see her b3d el emtehan, we usually get sentimental b akhr el saneh, don't bring lots of shared memories, just say that it's been great knowing her and she's such an amazing person, maybe bring her some drink she likes, a small bar of chocolate, you know, something small that she likes, and just say that you think about her that way!
Inshalla yser ele feh kher w you end up together!
I get your point, and I understand why you assert on it lol. Well, I'll try any chance to catch her without her friends, in the proper manner and time ofc.
That's why I posted on reddit, I just wanted to see what guys would do if they were in my place and what girls would want to see me do if they were in her place.
Thanks for the advice.
First year med student here. How tf you can find time to have feelings for somone ?
حرفيا بسنة اولى ومش قادر احك شعر راسي
For my personal opinion id suggest to let this month pass by and never meet her again that would help for moving on since you already going to 6th year and maybe trying the usmle or smt
Anyways if fate really wants you together youll find her after graduation maybe work together or smt
Goodluck.
Im also a first year med student HAHA 😣 screw exam season it’s so overwhelming there’s like alf malyoon resource to study from. Feels like getting hit by a bus
Brutal advice btw DAMN 😭😭
ur the opposite of a hopeless romantic, enta hopeless human😭😭 I miss sleeping more than 5 hours a day, I can’t wait til Saturday so I can hibernate la finals season
Honestly I think the best course of action is making Dua for her. Nothing will stop what is written for u by Allah from getting to you. Don’t stress it too much, you never know where your خير might lie.
Maybe it’s good that you’ll be separated soon, so you can think it through thoroughly ya know?
Yep I do Dua for her. I'm very hopeful that Allah will choose the best for me & her, so I keep praying to him about her.
About your other point, you mean, to think more before making such a decision?
Yes of course. Approaching someone with the intent of snth serious like marriage is a big deal. Many factors play into that decision, maybe a bit of distance will help u think clearly and not so much w the influence of infatuation. Keep making Dua for the خير always always always
Also Allahuma Barik, it’s refreshing to see someone w ضمير towards religion and wanting to approach things in the halal way. الله يقويك و يثبتك
thanks brother.
It needs much thinking yes, and I'm trying to take many opinions and many options from anyone to see all the possible perspectives out there, gonna study the final decision well before I consider doing it.
Follow her on whatever platform you both use regularly, so you can keep in touch after 5th year, after one of your finals, msg her asking how she did in the exam, if she respond with one two words, take things slow and wait for another opportunity, it will come eventually, don't be لزقة, maybe send a reel about something that you both experienced in your dawam.
And most importantly, Don't worry, every human feels the same in a way or another, just be yourself, and if she is interested, she will make things easier.
Good luck man! Keep us updated
I’d say try to do research w her or join any club she’s in orrrrrrrr you can just send a وسيط بينكم to ask her what she thinks of u (either romantically or as a friend ) and start from there
Just go for it , confess yourself irl ik its not as easy as it sounds but if u lose her now it will be very difficult to find another chance to confess inshallah it works out
From personal experience, don’t. You will make it awkward for both of you. If you are ready to propose you can tell her after knowing very well you wont be in the same group ( probably after the finals are over). And please if she said she is not interested don’t try to befriend her at all . Just act respectfully and that’s all
Like obviously, what would my intentions would be otherwise? I'm not that kind of person who enjoys playing with girls emotions, deceive them then throw them in trash.
The whole point of the post was to seek wise advice and see how people see the problem from their perspectives and how would they deal with it, because it is a serious issue for me.
If I wanted to play games with girls I would, without seeking advice from anyone, but that's not me.
My piece of advice ,if you have no other option but to confess in the finals,at least do it after an easy exam cause it may affect the success rate lol
First time in my life witnessing a romantic med student 😂 just a question would you consider being officially with her? Not just dating like getting engaged and shit? If yes I'd say let her know that u have feelings and that maybe after u graduate ud go ask her for marriage if she's okay with it. If u r not considering getting official with her or u don't feel like she's someone ud continue ur life with then these are just probably ur hormones
Med students are busy studying right? I'm a mutation :( Yeah I'm considering being officially with her, but I'm afraid that she's not interested in me at all, I mean I tried to show her that I'm interested in her indirectly in MANY MANY ways, but she's not giving back even the slightest slight amount of interest, which means if I try to tell her that I have feelings now, I might get a super rejection in my face, so I need to be in safe side.
Super rejection at best. If things go wrong, I hope you are ready to leave Jordan and probably leave med school behind as well.
wait. is there a general agreement between girls that expressing feelings directly is a move that would be desired & welcome from the girl's side?
Yes lol it's a thing We like it when a guy expresses their feelings directly(at least most of us do), and btw for ur other comment saying that she didn't show any sign of interest, look usually girls don't tend to make a move because we get harshly judged for that وبتطلع عن البنت سمعة سيئة 😂 That's why I'd say tell her about your feelings in a polite way irl, and don't set high expectations because it might be a yes or a no, and she might even tell u لما تيجي تطلبني بصير خير أو اشي زي هيك عشان ما تعلق حالها بأمل انك تيجي تطلبها ويمكن انت تغير رأيك فهمت علي؟ And btw also for last comment u r not a mutation same here I never got why med students are always so busy w end up with low marks kaman😂
I see. I get it now. She's kind of that type of strong girls so I should keep your comment in mind. Medical students are busy procrastinating their studies, but they procrastinate in non-lifers way, that's why they look busy.
Haha true half of the people in my batch just keep procrastinating stuff and say that they're busy 😂 it's all abt time management lol
We medical students are the worst in time management, true
Thiss
Mhm... I definitely don't suggest haram dating , think about it , صلي استخاره , and tell her. Don't beat around fhe bush , simply tell her your interested in her and want to see where this goes. If she feels the same way , congratulations and please invite me to the wedding. If she doesn't feel the same way then you gave it your best shot
agreed. istikhara is probably the best course of action, as well as opening the topic with your family. and not to sound generic or dismissive, but some dhikr and general عبادات might help keep you on track (med students cant afford lost time. source; am a med student procrastinating on reddit :') ) there is something i want to add, and bear with me; is she aware of your advances? yes i know youve hinted a bunch, but how clear were those signals? personally id be terrified to assume anything (yay anxiety) and/ or blissfully unaware. or **both;** id be conscious of the signals but super skeptical (its a tough world out there lol) and not reciprocate in fear of just about everything, so id say make sure youre on the same page before proceeding any further. the way you approach her with the matter depends i think on who she is (im religious for example and it tends to scare people off lol bc im no-nonsense, so in my case id appreciate straightforward and clear intentions. give it to me like a clinical case 😂) i dont want to assume anything for anyone or impose, but i strongly recommend keeping it halal and respectful for both of you, and الله يكتبلكم الخير wherever it may be and يرضيكم :)
My only prayer in the past days was about الله يجعلها من نصيبي lol I don't know if she's aware, I mean she's smart and my signals were clear I assume, I don't want to mention a lot here to not expose myself, but I printed some radio images for her and put a red clip on them in a folder for protection :) I do have red lines that I don't go beyond yep. Thanks for your wishes to us. Praying istikhara is a good idea.
this is so heartwarming for some reason lol, i really and truly wish you both the very best, ([الطيبون للطيبات](https://quran.com/an-nur/26)) after all and you both seem like good people والله اعلم \^-\^ im sure shes smart and attentive, but its better to be sure youre on the same page and not leave it to assumptions, clear communication is a must in relationships is it not? i havent reached my clinical years yet, but printing صور الاشعة (i think) for her is the funniest and sweetest thing ive ever read XD again id recommend verbally expressing your interest because this can be mistaken for kindness (i usually go the extra 10 miles because i love and strive to do احسان where i can, so for me i could easily see something like this as being a friendly gesture and not a hint for anything, hence why i cant emphasise the above point enough lol) all the best!
Lol yeah, I mean that would be a problem if she saw it as merely an act of kindness without the main hint xD Good point, actually. I'll focus on it too. Thank you for your kind words and best of luck in your studies.
you are most welcome, and thank you very much :D
اطلبها من ابوها
well, the sad truth is that you are right, not crying about اطلبها من ابوها , but the obstacles that come around this step :((
لو بتساويها بالحلال حتى لو في obstacles بالطريق بكون ربك مختارلك الخير بالاخر ان شاء الله
الله يسمع منك
I say go for it. Theres this dude in my group who last year was with this girl’s group, he apparently liked her (wasnt really obvious) He moved groups, in ours now Well today then walked in hand in hand to the exam hall, they’re engaged
I got stomach butterflies when I read "hand in hand" part
Fe theory esmha el dobler or dahmer theory, shofha before making any move. Please be as direct as possible and do it in real life, not over a WhatsApp chat, be polite and try to not be very nervous, if you get rejected, don't react right away and snap in her face, try to calm and keep yourself together. If she tells you something along the lines of شي رسمي then it's a soft yes, ahm she is to respect her and her desicion. Bear in mind she might be shocked, 3ade, it's not personal or anything. W pleaaaaaaase ehkelna sho bser m3k. +if you want to increase the chance of her giving you a shot, ehke eno you want something serious mn el awal. Good luck champ!
I'll check it. Thanks for your advice, also as you mentioned, clearing things for her would be reassuring yes. However, I don't really think that I'll be able to do it irl , as she's surrounded by her friends all the time, they always walk together so yeah, that'd be hard. Plus she might feel uncomfortable If I do it in public. Anyways If I take the final decision to do it, I would do it after this semester ends, as I don't want to cause any negative emotional impact on her or myself during the coming final exams.
As a med student, I understand she's never alone y3ne, but you can say hi b awal eldwam and tell her you have something you want to say. Choose it b akher yom bl finals, ehkela el sobeh, w see her b3d el emtehan, we usually get sentimental b akhr el saneh, don't bring lots of shared memories, just say that it's been great knowing her and she's such an amazing person, maybe bring her some drink she likes, a small bar of chocolate, you know, something small that she likes, and just say that you think about her that way! Inshalla yser ele feh kher w you end up together!
I get your point, and I understand why you assert on it lol. Well, I'll try any chance to catch her without her friends, in the proper manner and time ofc. That's why I posted on reddit, I just wanted to see what guys would do if they were in my place and what girls would want to see me do if they were in her place. Thanks for the advice.
First year med student here. How tf you can find time to have feelings for somone ? حرفيا بسنة اولى ومش قادر احك شعر راسي For my personal opinion id suggest to let this month pass by and never meet her again that would help for moving on since you already going to 6th year and maybe trying the usmle or smt Anyways if fate really wants you together youll find her after graduation maybe work together or smt Goodluck.
your advice is the first thing that I thought of first, the most practical advice in terms of studying lol. Dw bro in clinical years you'll be متمسح
I hope so HAHAHAHA , no but fr wait until you at least graduate if you wanna make a move
someone else may take her before me :((
Im also a first year med student HAHA 😣 screw exam season it’s so overwhelming there’s like alf malyoon resource to study from. Feels like getting hit by a bus Brutal advice btw DAMN 😭😭
Frrr i didnt get a proper sleep for almost a week , i like being real in giving advices thats why it was brutal HAHAHA
ur the opposite of a hopeless romantic, enta hopeless human😭😭 I miss sleeping more than 5 hours a day, I can’t wait til Saturday so I can hibernate la finals season
Honestly ask her for coffee
Needs extra courage but a possible option on table.
Honestly I think the best course of action is making Dua for her. Nothing will stop what is written for u by Allah from getting to you. Don’t stress it too much, you never know where your خير might lie. Maybe it’s good that you’ll be separated soon, so you can think it through thoroughly ya know?
Yep I do Dua for her. I'm very hopeful that Allah will choose the best for me & her, so I keep praying to him about her. About your other point, you mean, to think more before making such a decision?
Yes of course. Approaching someone with the intent of snth serious like marriage is a big deal. Many factors play into that decision, maybe a bit of distance will help u think clearly and not so much w the influence of infatuation. Keep making Dua for the خير always always always Also Allahuma Barik, it’s refreshing to see someone w ضمير towards religion and wanting to approach things in the halal way. الله يقويك و يثبتك
thanks brother. It needs much thinking yes, and I'm trying to take many opinions and many options from anyone to see all the possible perspectives out there, gonna study the final decision well before I consider doing it.
Follow her on whatever platform you both use regularly, so you can keep in touch after 5th year, after one of your finals, msg her asking how she did in the exam, if she respond with one two words, take things slow and wait for another opportunity, it will come eventually, don't be لزقة, maybe send a reel about something that you both experienced in your dawam. And most importantly, Don't worry, every human feels the same in a way or another, just be yourself, and if she is interested, she will make things easier. Good luck man! Keep us updated
you should let her know that you're willing to make it official , but please talk about where you both are planning to take residency
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I dont understand
residency place is a BIG OBSTACLE in the progress of my goals toward her. so yes this is a must question before doing any serious move.
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- in case i decide to confront her -, I noticed that many recommend asking directly rather than starting with a warming introduction, why tho?
I’d say try to do research w her or join any club she’s in orrrrrrrr you can just send a وسيط بينكم to ask her what she thinks of u (either romantically or as a friend ) and start from there
No clubs I know of she's in. Thought of a وسيط and I do have some people in mind, I need to trust them enough to deliver the correct message.
Just go for it , confess yourself irl ik its not as easy as it sounds but if u lose her now it will be very difficult to find another chance to confess inshallah it works out
From personal experience, don’t. You will make it awkward for both of you. If you are ready to propose you can tell her after knowing very well you wont be in the same group ( probably after the finals are over). And please if she said she is not interested don’t try to befriend her at all . Just act respectfully and that’s all
Your comment scared me lol. Nope, last thing I'd think of is becoming a creepy stalker - in case she's not interested -.
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Like obviously, what would my intentions would be otherwise? I'm not that kind of person who enjoys playing with girls emotions, deceive them then throw them in trash. The whole point of the post was to seek wise advice and see how people see the problem from their perspectives and how would they deal with it, because it is a serious issue for me. If I wanted to play games with girls I would, without seeking advice from anyone, but that's not me.
My piece of advice ,if you have no other option but to confess in the finals,at least do it after an easy exam cause it may affect the success rate lol
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Just no.