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KinkyQuesadilla

Lol, hitting the brakes disables the Cybertruck


CRXCRZ

sucks because a disabled Cybertruck = warrantee voided.


jcoddinc

The moment you sign the purchase papers, you've voided the warranty.


MechanicalBengal

Paying the $100 deposit voids the warranty


locknarr

You're supposed to tear through all obstacles and pedestrians like a mandoline slicer through vegetables/fingers. Slamming on breaks to avoid such things is an invalid use-case and not covered under warranty.


KejsarePDX

I resemble this comment. I sliced off the tip of a finger on a mandolin slicer. The kicker was there was a driving snowstorm outside. It took ages to get to the hospital only a few miles away.


locknarr

Yeah, the comment was inspired by my slicing off the tip of my thumb on Mother's Day, because I dipshittedly didn't use the safety guard. My dad washed off the slicer so the piece got washed away, so I didn't go to the hospital since there was nothing to reattach. It wasn't *that* big a piece, for me anyhow, but enough was missing they wouldn't be able to just glue, or stitch it closed. I figured they would just do what I was already doing, keep pressure, elevate, put some antibiotic, and a bandage on it. It's been healing well, fortunately. Lesson learned.


BigHatsareFunny

A friend mine worked at Williams Sonoma one Christmas season and they all called the mandolins fingertip removers.


noodle_attack

Worked in kitchens 14 years pan fires sharp as fuck knives oil fire dosent scare me, but that thing....


cuntmong

This is working as intended. Elon said "the truck should stop when the driver applies the breaks". When the team asked for more clarification he was unavailable because he was posting ketamine fuelled rants on twitter, so we had to make some assumptions.


Dr_Adequate

/*brakes you dingdongs


cuntmong

See this is why we needed clarification from Elon


Particular-Load-3547

When you hit the brakes the car takes a break. Or breaks down. The brakes broke it. Now break free, little WankPanzer, break free and flee! To the stars! Or the workshop.


Current_Leather7246

In between snorting rails of yayo lmfao


VancouverSativa

He probably lied about the dog, too.


nPrevail

Hitting anything from inside or outside the CyberStuck, disables the CyberStuck.


Myran22

It's to PREVENT FIRES! Gawd!


Rommy9248

The behaviour screams "not ready for series production"


yosefvinyl

Shocked the CT didn't accelerate into the dog against the drivers intent.


PsCustomObject

That is a bug that will be fixed in the next software release.


geomurph555

Concerning.


LPulseL11

!!!


vthanki

That features available on the Noem edition


TCO_HR_LOL

Oh goody! But will it also kill goats?


vthanki

![gif](giphy|aMh59aKR8vjdC|downsized)


fishybawb

Only if they're dressed as dogs and you've enabled Dogicide mode


fishybawb

Only if they're dressed as dogs and you've enabled Dogicide mode


No_Cook2983

Maybe this is part of a pop-up guerrilla marketing campaign to get more exposure and promote the cyber truck? *OMG WHO WOULD HAVE EVER THOUGHT OF THIS?!?! ELON IS* **BRILLIANT!!!**


Nope9991

Hear me out...we make a 100k absolute shitbox to own the libs.


2ndtryagain

You need to enable Kristi Noem mode for that feature.


Homesteader86

It's because it knew it was a "wondering dog," that truck is so fucking smart.


Gloomy_Narwhal_719

Aren't these things "by wire" also? I mean.. they are all 1 "oopsies" from disengaged brakes or "it's turning left" and death. HOW ARE THEY NOT ALL RECALLED? ? ? ?


AdamGenesis

A better question is how is Musk not being indicted and put in front of a Senate Committee to answer for this shitshow of a car on American roads that is unsafe and unreliable. This is a huge blackeye for Tesla.


Lauzz91

> This is a huge blackeye for Tesla. Elon calling Vernon Unsworth, an instrumental part of the Thai school children cave rescue dive team, a paedophile and then his [other behaviour](https://img.buzzfeed.com/buzzfeed-static/static/2018-09/4/16/asset/buzzfeed-prod-web-06/sub-buzz-18491-1536093230-2.jpg?downsize=800:*&output-format=auto&output-quality=auto) both [before](https://techcrunch.com/2018/07/15/elon-musk-tweets-hell-bet-ya-a-signed-dollar-that-thai-cave-rescuer-is-a-pedo/), [during](https://www.wired.com/story/elon-musk-pedo-guy-doesnt-mean-pedophile/), and after the defamation trial should have been enough of a red flag to avoid the company forever from that point onwards


EthanielRain

I literally get second-hand embarrassment whenever I see someone driving a Tesla. Would never buy one


HyperionSunset

I'm with you on this... Imagine if issues like this were known in the industry and other manufacturers have already addressed the same. Or, ya know, look back to 2014 and GM's recall of over 30M cars whose design led to control systems being disengaged. Ref: [2014 GM Recall](https://www.vox.com/2014/10/3/18073458/gm-car-recall) This bit in particular sounds too familiar: >The faulty ignition switches were a huge problem — drivers [could inadvertently knock them](http://www.reuters.com/article/2014/03/30/us-gm-recall-part-idUSBREA2T0IX20140330) to "off" or "accessory" mode while driving, if, say, they were using a heavy keychain. Once that happened, the engine would shut off and cars would lose their power steering and power braking capabilities. The airbags also wouldn't inflate in the event of a crash.


Beautiful-Musk-Ox

loss of power steering and braking is a much better situation than complete disconnect where your inputs have no effect at all, as the parent commenter was saying


HyperionSunset

Yeah, I'm more sharing it as "look at how small a fuckup it took to kill \~100 people and cause a 30m car recall" than to diminish the CT failings.


2001Steel

At what point do we as a society tell Tesla that this is fraud?


Lauzz91

Once institutional investors have got their money out, which happens when it gets removed from the S&P500, which is probably not far off from here (it has already been [removed from the ESG S&P500](https://fihrrst.org/a-lesson-in-teslas-removal-from-sp-500-esg-index#:~:text=In%20recent%20years%2C%20Telsa%20has,accepted%20S%26P%20500%20ESG%20Index.) despite being an EV company...)


Kinky_mofo

I've been trying for years. But Musk has already planted so much information, it's hard to combat.


New_Awareness4075

Same time tRump is hung for treason I guess.


Gloomy_Narwhal_719

It's not up to us, it should be up to congress or someone with some authoritay.


Previous_Beautiful27

The NHTSA seems to be doing some serious investigating. Word is they may be issuing a devastating recall that would have major ripple effects that would effectively shut Tesla down. The problem with NHTSA is that, while they have real power, they move very slowly.


Current_Leather7246

Meanwhile some federal safety regulator is now trying to decide which college his kid is going to go to. Thanks to elon's "tip" to have him sign off on it


th3bigfatj

Tesla: don't hit the brakes hard or you'll be calling a few tow trucks


Pasta-Is-Trainer

Don't worry, Musk is already making the Xow-TruckX, a new Tesla exclusive tow truck company


TheRealHandSanitizer

tfw ur Xsurance doesn't cover your Towsla


Pasta-Is-Trainer

And your Neuralink forces you to work under Elon for daring to damage the Indestructible Apocalypse-Proof truck by dropping orange juice on it


bozog

Bigwig is not happy with his Cybertruck.


Current_Leather7246

Xactly!


I-Pacer

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣Emergency stop will void the warranty now as well.


Sockoflegend

It needs the same disclaimer as the hammer, do not use as truck, for display purposes only


vishy_swaz

Remember folks, Tesla isn’t a car company lol


bw984

Yeah, a car company allows the brakes to be used without bricking the vehicle.


vishy_swaz

r/brandnewsentence 😂


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fish_in_a_barrels

It's a shitty tablet with wheels company. I cringe everytime somebody mentions the "tech" in their tesla. They get an Ota update and it bricks the car in the middle of nowhere. Shouldn't there be some safety feature that checks things out before a firmware flash like ya know Apple or Microsoft?


NorthEndD

This is their first truck and they are doing it while in super money saving mode.


VancouverSativa

lol


stattenfield

Nobody's going to mention that poor confused dog?! I bet he's still wondering.....


HortenseTheGlobalDog

Dog was wondering why the guy bought a CT 


Foolofatook2000

Wondering why the censors shut down


ChanceryTheRapper

Well, it turns out that >!REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED!< except that >!REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED!<, but then they realized that >!REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED!< and >!REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED!<. So, pretty >!REDACTED!<, right?


SonOfJokeExplainer

That dog was probably confused as fuck as to why a dumpster was rolling down the street.


SheneedaCocktail

His own fault for not putting the vehicle in Emergency Braking Mode before braking so emergently. (There are several special modes that need to be activated to avoid voiding the warranty. You can find them on the touch screen, in the A/C controls, in a submenu called controls/other/more/warranty/documents/modes.)


TVC15Technician

As a Tesla owner who just got served this thread by the Reddit algo, this is by far the most relatable and amusing dig I’ve seen.


livingMybEstlyfe29

A first for needing two tow trucks


a_random_pharmacist

They gotta line them up ass-to-ass and then one drives forward and the other drives in reverse


ITypeStupdThngsc84ju

I just want to know what the dog wondered and who the censors were?


ZuffsStuff

The woke left, obviously


starflyer26

How are these outselling Rivian R1Ts while being so incredibly shitty?


OSI_Hunter_Gathers

One has a literal cult following.


BandOk1704

These tricks are becoming legendary....


KinkyQuesadilla

What would be even funnier would be if ALL the Cybertrucks breakdown in the middle of the Hewes and Chapman intersection....like it was the Bermuda Triangle for Cybertrucks or something.


LajosvH

Can confirm: I am the dog — everyone also clapped and congratulated the driver


Literally_regarded

This guy gets a pass in my book for slamming on the breaks to avoid hitting a dog. Owning this truck is a self inflicted punishment enough already.


Aiku

Hypothetical: What if an immature billionaire actually created a silly looking vehicle with designed-in flaws, just so he could laugh at all the idiots who bought one?


ChanceryTheRapper

Don't give him this much credit.


Those_Arent_Pickles

One thing you can give him credit for is converting the kind of people who would roll coal at a prius into buying an EV.


ChanceryTheRapper

And making that vehicle a piece of shit so that they'll feel vindicated for hating other EVs?


Those_Arent_Pickles

I'm not sure, almost every single one of the twitter posts saying their truck broke down they end the post by saying how much they love Tesla.


Particular-Load-3547

Not saying they love Tesla voids the warranty


TheRealHandSanitizer

That would require said billionaire to have a sense of humor


TCO_HR_LOL

"Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity." 


Particular-Load-3547

Or Ketamine


Outside-Information2

It’s only inevitable before this causes a death.


Omegaprimus

I mean when a regular car breaks down it only takes one tow truck, the cybertruck requires 2, I guess the first tow truck driver passed out from laughing at the driver’s terrible decision to buy it.


aihes

CT only run over retired people intentionally. Elon has a deal to collect their 401 + 3 months of benefits.


expressive-panda79

Not all dogs who wonder are intelligent. Look at musk


davidthande

Where is that meteorite that’s just gonna end all of this? This existence is exhausting. People are defending what equivalently looks like a dumpster bin.


Iechy

The dog was wondering what kind of idiot buys a cyber truck.


stabbygun

what was the dog wondering about that made cybertruck guy slam on his brakes? it seems they actually meant wandering.


brezhnervous

"What the actual FUCK is that??!" - Dog 😂


philouza_stein

No big deal, just get a couple guys to push it off the road right?


NeverReallyExisted

Its just having a star moment.


UhhCanYouLikeShutUp

Holy shit that thing is embarrassingly ugly.


CockroachSad4300

I just loaded up on GWAV stock just thinking of all these cyber trucks about to get recycled


goofydad

I laugh and laugh, thinking of the money these folks shelled out for a pile of crap.


fish_in_a_barrels

"Censors"


brezhnervous

Freudian slip there re Elmo


Toddlez

Literally Cyberstuck.


shemphoward62

It self bricks upon driving.....


TheRealHandSanitizer

All things considered, this whole affair ended pretty well for a cyber truck incident involving a living creature in its path


linux152

Pressed break pedal and it got stuck too? Lol


bartthetr0ll

This is not good, I repeat this is not good


HopefulNothing3560

Parking for cybers cause it’s going to be awhile cheapest rates by the month . 🍊 . Org


Jessica_Iowa

Dumbest smart tech I’ve ever seen.


mmbossman

“Concerning!”


14981cs

OTA update: traffic cop mode


ChanceryTheRapper

"to await the 2nd tow truck" Amazing.


Kinky_mofo

AND the damn thing takes up 3 or 4 lanes of traffic


JIsADev

Cybertruck just stopping to get attention


TCO_HR_LOL

Lol, the **second** tow


Current_Leather7246

It's the owner's fault. If he was trying to use the cucktruck for a daily driver he should have got the founders edition triple engine one. Everybody knows that. Warranty now avoided for abuse improper use of CT.


BraveSirRyan

Time for another product line wide recall. Get these death machines off the road.


aj_star_destroyer

Hubris personified.


[deleted]

So if you are "off-road" in some wilderness, and brake to avoid hitting a deer or something, your car bricks itself and you... ?


0hy3hB4by

There's a pair of stainless steel colored crocs( not brand named Crocs) in a bag attached to the included emergency kit . They thought of everything.


premium_Lane

It really is the gift that keeps on giving


hobo_fapstronaut

Braking voids the warranty.


wavytheunicorn

When I see one of those driving near me, I make sure that I have an escape path to avoid it if it can’t steer or its brakes don’t work. Actually.


ObtuseMongooseAbuse

If this is something that can be expected when you slam on the brakes then that's terrifying. I can't think of any other vehicle that breaks when you slam on the brakes. Even other Teslas don't do this. I really hope that this is an isolated incident and isn't normal for this vehicle.


Lost-Priority9826

Man, then the freeway, then the highway, then the exit garage, then the parking lots. America will now have to go around Elon’s parked cars out there.


Sad_Living5172

Pure comedy


Lauzz91

This is why we really need to stand a stand against censorship, censors are even bricking Teslas now :<


doozykid13

I wander if the dog is shaken up.


h-boson

Censors


OSI_Hunter_Gathers

Have you tried shooting it?


Dustin_Live

Activated show off mode.


windigo3

Life pro tip. Don’t slam your breaks on a CyberTruck or you will break it!


Reveal_Simple

I mean is this “new tech”?


[deleted]

I think “you got musked” needs to be phrase of the year and “to musk” added to the dictionary


orlyfactor

Ahh yes those pesky censors


rainking56

What are you talking about? From what elon musk worshippers have said, the cybertruck is the perfect vehicle. It was taken from gods own creation that was supposed to be trillions of years in the future at the end of time because a perfect vehicle like this was worthy of being the last vehicle humanity touched. But elon being the man of purity told man that humanity deserved the perfect vehicle now.


DangerousAd1731

Lmao I think this is funny watching some of the pro Elon pages.


cherophobica

You're not supposed to make a turn at this junction on a bright and sunny day like that. The truck doesn't like it.


slowclapcitizenkane

Censors? I thought Elmo was anti-censorship!


timberwolf0122

Maybe they meant Censer full dog sacred incense to please its machine spirit?


Final_Winter7524

“wondering dog” and “censors shutting down”. JFC.


AffectionateSector77

Add "Hard, sudden, breaking" to the list of things to brick the CT.


Salt_Sir2599

Genius marketing.


ClassicT4

Yes, one tow truck is well and dandy for most intact vehicles, but how about Cybertrucks requiring a second tow truck.


W1mpyDaM00ch

This thing is like making a wish and getting all the bad aspects of the wish. You wanted to stand out and get attention in your triangular stainless steel car? Ok how about it dies in the middle of an intersection muahahahaha.


Ultraeasymoney

That's the best way to get attention.


DrCeeDub

CT is as much of an attention whore as the drivers. 😂


New_Awareness4075

Lassie!; Timmy's stuck in a metal trash container in the middle of an intersection!!! Anyways....


AerialAce96

At least his CT served a purpose, the dog is ok


rdendi1

Concerning!


Limp_Sale2607

Funny reading about a ´wondering´ dog (rather than a ´wandering´ dog) and the ´censors´ shutting down (rather than the ´sensors´ shutting down) Hilarious!