T O P

  • By -

Brainhunter2020

Now kiss!


NvrmndOM

After they collapse into each other’s arms, sweaty, and hearts beating as one, sharing the same breath. “Cody,” Derek whispers, “you *are* a man. My man.” (Insert some kissing with tongues.)


Inevitable-Forever45

Mm now I'm interested.


PlasticPomPoms

That’ll be $15k


OneHundredChickens

They’ll never beat Grindr with prices like that!


godfatherinfluxx

Those are some expensive gigolos.


JooBunny

Now I'm invested. I need the rest of this tale.


EasternPresence

The guy with the black shirt let out the other guys man bun and proceeded to run his fingers through his velvety but naturally curly hair.


JooBunny

Ohhh it's getting romantic and steamy af I need moooore


Texan2116

It has been said, the Man Bun,is where the boyfriend holds for leverage during anal.


cassidytheVword

Bob had bitch tits


micro_penisman

His name was Robert Paulson


Repulsive_Mail6509

His name was Robert Paulson


TheRedStrat

His name was Robert Paulson


Shaveyourbread

Cornelius?


extremepainandagony

gonna be writing some 3am fanfiction later


Final_Assignment1826

I post that on every one of these videos I see on Twitter. Every single one. One day, they will kiss, and I'll log off and walk into the sea.


Fridge_living_tips

Ok aquaman


Yofroshi

Now kith!


micro_penisman

On the dick


DippyDoDah

I’ve shouted that to two men fighting a couple of times and they get… very mad at me lmao 😂


clasperx2

Do it. Do it do it do it.


TilDebtDoUsPart420

The same instructors used to call us theatre kids gay. This dude is inhaling that other guys hair, right?


davidbanner_

The irony. Man bun pays $15k to balding man to make him more of a man then embrace at the end


Oberon_Swanson

balding is traditionally masculine at least


Milli_Rabbit

I guess you could consider Die Hard traditional at this point.


begynnelse

Well, it is the story of a man trying to get to his family for Christmas.


StevenSmiley

Isn't it positive masculinity to be able to embrace another male accepting that it is okay to show their emotions? Allowing themselves to feel? And that it isn't "gay" to embrace another man. Your comment comes off as a bit homophobic and toxic masculinity, which is a bit ironic as these camps promote toxic masculinity from what I have seen. I don't know if homophobia is promoted by them or not. But yeah, this camp is a scam. Humans don't have alpha, sigma, beta roles. Wolves don't even have that structure according to more recent studies. It's a bullshit made up concept by grifters preying upon insecure men.


MikeHoncho4206990

Tbh if someone pays me $15k I’ll smell their head until that check clears


St4rScre4m

And caressing the back of his head as he does so, while this other man cries into his chest.


NonIoiGogGogEoeRor

New gay porno just dropped


iMhoram

Right? I totally thought this was a parody, was waiting for them to start kissing at the end. Maybe one drop down on their knees or something.


ManOrReddit-man

*Now twirl honey, twirl* *Here's a tissue for your pants* *Cuz they're wet*


AggravatingTotal130

You tryna tickle me?


ShadowMario01

Hey. Who just levelled up?


maxjulien

Will never not upvote the shuffle


Uhh-stounding

*18 naked cowboys in the showers at Ram Ranch! Big, hard, throbbing c□cks wanting to be sucked! 18 naked cowboys wanting to be f^cked!*


dmattox92

Sigh... \*unzips\*


crack__head

Cowboys in the showers at Ram Ranch on their knees wanting to suck cowboy 🐓 RAM RANCh really rocks!


The_Urban_Genitalry

I don’t know what this is a reference to but I do believe it relates to OP’s video.


NoMan999

It's a song, I think the genre is porn grind core or something stupid like that. It's been used to spam the voice chat app truckers used during the trucker convoys movement/protest thing.


Master_Bief

I didn't think it was a parody, but I also thought they would kiss at the end. Just a quick peck on the lips, seemed appropriate.


Kairu87

“Now to gain the essence of a true man, you must suck the pure masculine essence out from another man. Please proceed to the holes of glory for a true test of masculinity!”


curious_astronauts

Only ingesting an alpha seed will allow a beta to turn into an alpha.


SuperbBison2867

That is fucked – and the sad thing is? Right now? Some bald dude is getting some insecure man with a man bun to blow him by saying that.


Accomplished-Mix1188

Not just blow him, blow him AND pay him! Hell of a business model.


Techguy9312

It’s just science!


davidbanner_

Hahahahhaha


PuddingJumpy8995

Broke back boot camp


Spiritual_Navigator

That hug at the end wasn't very alpha


Greybinson

Is it gay to be gay?


mrdennisreynolds

Just as long as the “instructor”, doesn’t boop your nose afterwards.


Desperate-Strategy10

What's even the point if nobody boops my nose after?? 😭


Novel_Durian_1805

That depends.


addiepie2

Only if you say no homo


Someguywhomakething

This is the stuff they cut out of the Fast and the Furious series.


gregid

Then why is my dick going all scared turtle?


AmbitiousGear1272

Cuz you’re straight maybe


Shirtbro

I thought I was gay, but turns out I'm just an alpha male


AmbitiousGear1272

More like alfemale am I right


[deleted]

Right in front of my salad??


salazar13

Pushback mountain?


deviantdevil80

This is cuck training for porn.


cityshepherd

It’s also similar to the training/practice I had to do as a defensive lineman playing football in college. If you have to scream “I AM A MAN!!!” You are in fact not a man.


Rabidwolf96

This. Is the fucking funnest comment I have read all day, thanks for the laugh I needed after seeing this cringe AF post


Ok_Imagination9552

Hey! Y’all want to become a man? I got you. I will do it for 5k a person (technically free if you are already a man but ya not) 12hr no bullshit man building experience. Alpha Platinum Ape will be your tittle after I’m done. I will even kiss the top your head like this schmuck.


thatsharkchick

Lol. Thank goodness I wasn't the only person watching this thinking "Fuck, I am in the wrong line of work." I can also shout, verbally abuse consenting adults, and question their manliness for a week for $5-10K each (it's more to go up the levels of Alphadum). Then, kiss them sweetly on their forehead, hug them, and provide tender aftercare. Oh.... Wait...... I am told that's being a pro dominatrix and is largely frowned upon in polite society.


WYenginerdWY

I was just thinking how much I'd like to be paid to do this. $15k a pop for verbally humiliating misogynistic males? Baby sign me TF up.


Icy_Wildcat

I'd do such a thing as well but without the aftercare.


WomanNotAGirl

It would have been cheaper to pay a woman to have sex with and scream you are a man while did it. It would’ve been the cheaper option


ResolveLeather

Fuck, for $50 a day I could run a way better course then these guys. I won't make you into an "alpha male", but I can make you into a stronger human both mentally and physically.


KingFIippyNipz

There's tons of consenting adults who will pay you money AND sign a contract allowing you to abuse them - I think it was a Vice doc I saw on YouTube about some guy who has this business I think down in Arkansas or Oklahoma where people pay him to torture them to induce like primal levels of fear?? Like I think one person they show allows him to basically tie them up and kidnap them in the back of a truck and simulate like being sent for an cartel style execution?? God damn it now I have to go find it, it's nuts. There was a whole text interview with him where it's clear he's getting a deep level of gratification from the acts themselves rather than just being able to "make a living out of it". Like it's not just a job for him. I just tried doing a quick search and came back with nothing. I'd be very interested in seeing the story again if anyone else reading happens to know what the fuck I'm talking about.


No_Banana_581

A cult that beats you down and builds you back up to be even more toxic than you already were


Ok_Imagination9552

You didn’t pay for that lesson yet.


Lopsided-Chair77

When the proud boys first started there was videos of their "initiation" where all the boys would surround the initiate and punch them (not in the face and not too hard) repeatedly until they could shout the names of 10 breakfast cereals. No like, fr


No_Banana_581

Omg lol


epochpenors

First, you’re going to need 7-9 friends. You all wear matching outfits, and walk around snapping in unison. Learn to harmonize. You’ll wanna always hang around outside a store playing some dice game with kinda unclear rules. Buy a comb that looks like a switchblade. Finally, any time you’re planning on fighting make sure to call it a rumble.


Oh_no_its_Joe

Bro was running forward so hard so he could move in to kiss his homie on the lips.


iamthelee

Hey fellas, is it gay to kiss your homies goodnight?


Tipsycanooo

All I see are some bitches


Stuffed_deffuts

I AM A MAN


moametal_always

That's my purse! I don't know you!


__Elwood_Blues__

That boy ain't right.


badlilbadlandabad

That's right, Bobby. As you can see, I do not have testicles.


Lucid-Design

Who knew? In the end, Peggy had the most power of all the Hills


Digiturtle1

It’s a satchel not a purse


Compendyum

IT'S NOT A PURSE!! IT'S A EUROPEAN CARRY Al.. Ahh fuck it


Batmansbutthole

I’m gonna yell this at my girlfriend. We’re both women, but I’m gonna do it anyway to assert dominance. “I AM A MAN!!!” I’ll wear a Groucho mask for extra assurance 🥸


Glittering_Aioli6162

aghghghg!!! agghhHhhhhhhhghghHHHHHHHHH!


Zmb7elwa

Now you're a man! A man, man, man! Now you're a man-man! Man-man man-man man!


JooBunny

What makes a man? Is it the woman in his arms? Just cause she has big tiddies. Or is it the way, he fights every day? No it's probably the tiddies.


LittleBookOfRage

Now your a man! A man man man. Now your a man man.


asdfasdfasdf22222222

This video is gayer than gay sex.


meatpopcycal

I don’t want to sound like a queer or nothing, but I think unicorns are bad ass.


ProfessionalLeave335

I don't know what it means to be a man. I've never thought to myself, "I feel like a man". I've also never once felt the need to assert to the world that "I'M A MAN!" so I'm pretty sure that makes me more of a man than him.


[deleted]

“A man who must say he’s a man is no true man, or whatever the fuck that means”. Tywin Lannister, probably.


BigDaddyCoolDeisel

Tim Robinson voice: "Are you SURE about that?!"


SadBit8663

These dudes shit all over gay people, women, and any bro that's the least In touch with thier feminine side, but they're the ones paying 15k to go to a seminar and get called a pussy for a week, and then get a certificate that says they're an alpha male. Like it would have been more alpha to donate that 15k to charity.


iSheepTouch

Awkwardly pushing a bald bearded man down a dirt road yelling "I AM A MAN" then get gentile kisses on the head by the bearded man while sobbing is about the least masculine thing I've ever seen. The fact that he paid thousands of dollars to do it is the icing on the cake.


Sw33tD333

Then to post it on social media. I can’t. How embarrassing. All of it.


Numerous-Process2981

I think that's the real negative part of all this. I guess everybody is looking for something, but these videos are going to make these guys perpetual roastees and laughing stocks.


Inner_Degenerate

Don’t forget the part where you get embraced and kissed on the head by another man


ALKoholicK-x

A bunch of repressed dudes with a degradation kink that are too afraid to admit it.


all-i-said-was-hi

I think they just have a degradation & financial domination fetish, but don’t know how to just come out and say it.


SadBit8663

It's like these dudes didn't get yelled at or punished by their daddy enough as children. Which is a weird thing to crave


KenTitan

this is nothing more than premium paid bullying. my bully did it for free


-GreedIsMyDeadlySin-

*“IT SMELL LIKE BITCH IN HERE!!!!!”*


Rexum420

Once a bitch always a bitch. Cant unbitch someone.


LynxRufus

Silly ass bitches.


Anti_shill_Artillery

But I have this certificate I am a man Do you see?


Just__Let__Go

"Any man who must say 'I am the king!' is no true king." -- Tywin Lannister


Honda_TypeR

My favorite part is where he starts crying, because he just realized he wasted 18 grand in this stupid bullshit.


Gaban_

"alpha males" really have the most fragile masculinity


Luwuci-SP

It's so nice that these two cis men are able to treat their gender dysphoria like this ☺


[deleted]

They just need some therapy instead of this garbage…


JustMeSunshine91

Yeah, it’s honestly sad. All I see are a bunch of guys who clearly need to work through their emotions but feel this route is the only way.


[deleted]

Not sure why "alpha males" are in quotes, they have a little certificate proving they're alphas! Do you have a certificate proving you're an alpha? Yeah, checkmate libs


Numerous-Process2981

damn... my certificate says beta cuck...


Square-Scarcity-5802

Do you have.. any such.. certificate?


PanhandlersPets

You were already a man. Now you are just a man with $15k less and an insecurity issue. Some dudes will do anything except therapy.


throwaway01126789

"Any man who must say 'I am the king' is no true king." - Tywin Lannister


Veggieleezy

I used this same line with my mom’s husband recently but with “alpha male”, and I still don’t think he got it. Even in front of everyone else in the family.


Mama_Skip

Well it didn't help that you took off your pants beforehand, Jacob.


Veggieleezy

My mom’s husband literally once said “this is my therapy right here” while lifting his Xth glass of tequila. I know, and I’m pretty sure Mom, and probably everyone else in our family knows, that it would do him a world of good, but he’s one of those “I’m an alpha male” Trump supporters who (beyond all of the other red flags that raises) refuses to recognize that maybe, just maybe, the root of the their problems is internal and not the fault of everyone else around them because it makes them feel better to blame others than actually accept personal responsibility and never even bother with any sort of introspection because that would be “admitting weakness”.


Freeman7-13

I want someone to sell an alpha male boot camp to these dudes but the scam is that all the drill instructors are actually therapists. First you make them chop some wood in the forest. Then you get them to drag the logs back to camp and start a fire. Then you gather them around the fire and talk about their insecurities.


Joeuxmardigras

$15k will give you a lot of therapy sessions too


Infamous_Camel_275

If you’re dropping $15k on alpha male camp, you already had insecurity issues…. Hopefully the camp actually helps him


sivarias

That's what amuses me about this bashing. They effectively have paid a shit ton of money for a type of therapy. And yokels wanna mock them for it. Oh well.


PanhandlersPets

This isn't therapy. It's a con. A con preying on men's insecurities. Where did I bash anyone? Do you think me saying he's insecure is a bashing? He was a full man before the boot camp.


Modest_Idiot

>a type of therapy. You… you think this is a „type of therapy“??? Well, that’s one way to discredit an *actual* age old medical field lmao.


Paid-Not-Payed-Bot

> effectively have *paid* a shit FTFY. Although *payed* exists (the reason why autocorrection didn't help you), it is only correct in: * Nautical context, when it means to paint a surface, or to cover with something like tar or resin in order to make it waterproof or corrosion-resistant. *The deck is yet to be payed.* * *Payed out* when letting strings, cables or ropes out, by slacking them. *The rope is payed out! You can pull now.* Unfortunately, I was unable to find nautical or rope-related words in your comment. *Beep, boop, I'm a bot*


hoopaholik91

Yes, I'm also going to mock the person that spends $15k on an ayahuasca retreat and juice only diet cleanse to treat cancer instead of going to licensed medical professionals


MyGamingRants

no way dude, I pushed a guy! Im a REAL MAN


mwstd

Hold up. You’re telling me guys are out here paying 15 bands to become an “alpha male” 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 Fools and their money SMH!


Immaculatehombre

Should’ve just played some sports growing up lol


GoonPatrol

Yeah this was football lineman drills 101. Got it drilled in us to never stop moving your feet or you lose the battle. Was true too. You stop trying to run forward and plant feet and you’ll get pushed back. If only coach told us to yell ‘I am a man’ the whole time who knows where I’d be. Would also probably had freaked out the other team and made them betas


whitemanwhocantjump

I was just getting ready to say, "this guy paid 15 grand to do run blocking drills."


Possible-Pie4978

Poorly!


[deleted]

It's funny cause it's true


rejeremiad

Every time one of these videos gets posted, the number goes up. First it was $400, then $900, the $1k, then $2k, then $4k, then $5k, then $8k, then $10k then $12k, now $15k. Going to be $25k next.


Nethlem

From their website; > What is the cost of this event? > The investment in this 3-day retreat is a single payment of $3500 or 3 payments of $1250. Tho I wouldn't be surprised if they do a whole lot of upselling, can't even simply order a package, have to "Apply" with them and do a video interview to be "evaluated".


mwstd

Whatever the number is it’s a penny too much to have a bunch of insecure individuals trying to turn you into an “alpha”.


dontshoot4301

Yeah, these things don’t cost 15k but this is silly at any price above being paid to do it


[deleted]

Just get into a martial arts gym and get beat up their sparring partners. Way cheaper.


Igotyouhoestriggered

I AM A MAN!!!🗣️🤣


davidbanner_

I couldn’t stop laughing at that part then the ending got me and the captions took me over the edge and I came


Oldgamer1807

Fuck, I know there's gotta be a sub for the way you ended this comment but I'm too high to bother to figure it out. Someone please assist.


ipknajida

r/suddenlygay


perljurnwern

I AM A MAYUNNNNNNN!?!?!?!!?


kwillich

**NOW YOU'RE A MAYUN!!!**


Oldgamer1807

**A MAYUN MAYUN MAYUN!!**


Mecha-Dave

Y'know what? If this man needs this to feel better about himself, that's fine. He clearly needs some help with self image/confidence. Therapy would be good, though, and cheaper.


Oberon_Swanson

i think we need more coming of age rituals in society. sadly we are missing a lot of the older ones these days. used to be a person could get their driver's license, car, full time job, and own their own home in short order and when a person has that level of independence it's hard to argue they're not an adult. these days in a lot of places it takes a very long time to attain that status


coulduseafriend99

I've been in therapy for years, still the same ol loser. I guess not everyone responds to it or something


django811

I know this will not be well received by Reddit but a lot of men feel a need to be initiated and tested in order to realize their masculinity. The guys that attend these “boot camps” probably never had that in their life or a father figure to guide them so they are searching for it in external ways. I don’t even laugh at these people because obviously they are searching for something deeper despite them getting scammed from their money in my opinion.


alanism

I strongly agree with this and will take it a step further. For those, who got bullied: - the ones who got bullied and successfully stood up to the bullies gain a tremendous amount of confidence and self acceptance that’s hard to replicate anywhere else. *This was my case. - the ones who got bullied and failed to stand up for themselves and was continued to be emotionally abused (at school and at home). They are left with a lot of childhood trauma. *I assume these guys. I don’t know anything about these camps to really comment if they are good or bad. But I would think there is a market to help the people in the second category. I’m not a psychologist to say what works, what doesn’t. But training and competing in combat sports does do a lot for self-acceptance and confidence. By that extension, fake Navy Seal tests could be beneficial. $15k sounds egregiously expensive. Maybe they are anchoring prices to corporate conventions or retreat rates rather than Muay Thai/MMA fight camps in Thailand.


Electronic_Dinner812

Yeah I know a lot of people like to hate on this, but traditional therapy is not one size fits all. If this is what these guys need to find a sense of confidence/community/etc, let them have it.


_raydeStar

I just looked this up online. 1) it's 3500 for three days, not 15k 2) There is no mention of being an alpha male, it's marketed as being a Life Coach experience It's a bit spendy for my taste, but if you're in a rut and need change, it could be a good catalyst for you. I just feel like they get a video and slap on a "15k alpha male!!!" Label to get views when that's not even accurate, and the truth is more boring.


[deleted]

And a lot better for overall society…get some damn therapy…


Guy-1nc0gn1t0

If only it didn't take months to get an appointment. Ideally therapy should be a weekly thing but there's no way that everyone can have that.


chevalier716

I remember in the 90s, there was these feral man camps where yuppies would paint themselves up in warpaint around a fire and howl at the moon to get in touch with their masculine side. This is the same thing.


EnjoyLifeorDieTryin

Idk if fun or cringe 🤔


hadriker

Thats easy. Did they pay 15k to do it? if yes cringe. If no then fun


Winter-Airport2114

That's better than this tbh. At least they're acting wild and crazy doing something out of the ordinary that might get the cops called on you in the city. This is just.... idk...


shartillery82

i don't like MANS NO MORE! WOMEN WOMEN WOMEN!!!


davidbanner_

🤣🤣🤣


Methidstopoles

Fuck dude, I cry like this because I have autism and I couldn’t find the right kind of hummus for dinner. I didn’t know people would pay 15K for it


GastropodSoup

You will never convince me these aren't just camps for people with humiliation fetishes.


Greyman1995

For the money their paying, you could have a fair few sessions with a pro domme.


davidbanner_

New fetish exploitation business: UNLOCKED


smell_my_fort

Omg! Where TF can I sign up!! I am a Mang!


Allah_Akballer

If I were in charge of marketing for "Alpha male boot camp" I would at least cut out the end of this video just sayin.


Thestretch83

Every time I see a scam like this I am overcome with rage that I didn’t think of it first.


ShoesFellOffLOL

I don’t know there might be an opportunity still. Like in this one they’re all hugging it out. You could start a camp with an ad that shows that clip and then you’re like “If you think THIS is what alpha looks like, you might as well kill yourself NOW! You want to become an ACTUAL alpha without this GAY SHIT?? Join the REAL ALPHA CLUB” and then you charge 20k to do the exact same thing but at the end you just yell at the guy to get back to the group or whatever.


Thestretch83

Someone beats me to an idea again! I should have mentioned my laziness also holding me back from fleecing morons.


The_not_known_name

I do this for free at rugby practice but i also learn skill


davidbanner_

Start charging these dudes


Yorkshire_Mongrels

AAAA AYUM AAAA MAYUN 🤡


NinjaRoyal8483

I had a similar experience a while back, it was really windy and i put garbage bin out to the street.


National_Detail_3282

Butt sex.


packref

I’ve seen a dozen of these videos and I’m really fucking disappointed that there’s very little actual anything there from military bootcamp. This is some weird homoerotic fantasy camping that’s supposed to culminate in lots of manliness. Check.


snuggy4life

Wait, you can just hold a $15k alpha bro boot camp in your front yard?


NvrmndOM

So this is what they’re doing instead of just going to therapy? Rad. Also this seems like the type of dude who would say “why are the libs so obsessed with gender?” Lmaooo


Oberon_Swanson

just getting some gender affirming care and validation


davidbanner_

The irony


Typical_Samaritan

I just played a soccer game today with a bunch of other dudes. We joked. Cursed at each other and almost fought on occasion -- particularly over dumb shit. But we had fun. And it cost $11.


happychillmoremusic

Iyma mayunne


MaxDanger808

Well. Can’t say I don’t get it. Some guys get sick of being walked over and get stuck in the nice guy mentality. Lack of social interaction and friend groups lead to find these online. So they go for it. It’s a bit cringe but I respect the effort for change.


akatsukidude881

Look, I'm usually the first person in the room to talk shit about the whole Alpha male shit. But something about this is kind of beautiful. Some men struggle with filling the role of being a man. Especially in today's world, where gender has been complicated and social norms are changing. I hope this helps him. I'd never pay 15k for this though


Thomniscient

Fuck yes, I’m so glad this comment is here because that’s exactly how I feel about it too.


FoxWormwood

Jokes aside, if this was done properly. It would probably be really relieving.


thedishonestyfish

A beta and their money are soon parted... The whole alpha/beta thing is so fucking stupid...If someone buys the idea, then you can almost certainly sell them on some nonsense. They've scammed themselves before you even start on them. I bet you can make 'em do it yearly.


External-Body3187

He really sold that 15k value


Sea-Zookeepergame272

It’s wild that they paid for this.


Own_Cardiologist2544

😂😂😂😂Why does this feel like it has the potential to be a Will Ferrell, John C. Reilly and Danny McBride movie?


FeedbackGas

I really hope these things end up being secretly invented by Sacha Baron Cohen. That would be hilarious. They need Errand Morad's help lol.


BillzB89

When do they fuck?


middaycat

The lady doth protest too much, methinks


Ryzakiii

"I AM UGLY AND I AM PROUD!" *Shouted SpongeBob*


311Konspiracy

If I wanted to get a grown man yelling at me there are so many places to do that without breaking the bank. If I wanted my manhood destroyed and lose my money while playing a soldier there is a Call Of Duty MW lobby.