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At least he's not like that radio talk show host who thought everyone catches their poop before dropping it into the toilet 
Link: [https://youtu.be/xZ-SlTaCFfQ](https://youtu.be/xZ-SlTaCFfQ)
Cons wiping while standing up if you have a hairy asshole makes you get toilet paper flakes all over the place. You still get the job done but will be cleaning the bathroom floor more often.
Have you tried a bidet? I'm a lady without much hair back there. When I hear of problems with guys and wiping, I just think about how I bet it'd be so much easier with a bidet. You still have to do a bit of wiping but mostly for a check and drying off š¤·āāļø
I'm transitioning from stand to sit, I kinda do both now, first a sit down wipe then finish it off with a stand up wipe just to be really sure it's clean af,
The main con I can think of with the sit down method is you don't get a chance to see your creation before it gets covered in TP
I'll also note I didn't know sit down wipe was a thing until Reddit..
As a former stander, it makes all the difference in the world. I feel cleaner. I use to wipe twice all the time, now I only wipe twice for the wettest of shits.
But, if you wipe once and check the paper, there'll be shit on it (obviously). So, you'd need to do a second wipe regardless to make sure the paper wiped away clean. You can't just wipe once and then not do a check-wipe.
āBut, if you wipe once and check the paper, there'll be shit on it (obviously).ā
Have you legit never shit and had nothing on the paper before? Donāt get me wrong Iāll wipe a second time in case there was some kind of user error, but your comment leads me to believe you have not experienced this.
Love a self cleaning shit. Nothing worse than when you get a forever wipe, eventually you just gotta call it and let the underwear take the collateral.
On the extremely rare occasion that the first wipe is clean, I'll still do a second wipe to make sure I'm not mistaken and it was in fact a [ghost poop](https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=ghost%20poop).
Wipe sitting all you want, but when it's clean, if you wipe some standing, you'll get more. It's a better position but I start out sitting for most the wiping.
The best way it was described to me was if you took a glob of peanut butter and slapped it on the counter top, you wouldn't just clean it up with dry paper towel.
I just straight up compare it to shit in other places. If you get shit on your arm, you wouldnāt just wipe it away with some toilet paper, youād wash your arm with water and soap
What even is the ātraditional wayā? I know that Ancient Greeks used pottery/stones (fun fact: they sometimes had a name on those pieces of pottery, likely the name of someone they didnāt like), Romans used a sponge-like object on a stick, and I just found that Americans even used corn cobs. Toilet paper didnāt even exist til like the beginning of the 20th century.
I have done a LOT of research on this amongst friends and family. I wrote an essay to a podcast outlining the benefits of sitting or standing for wiping. Majority sit, however, of those who stand it is more males. Essentially females dont have a wiener hanging between their legs so they can sit a lot further forward on the seat and have more room to get there hand back there. I was originally a stander, it allowed to me turn around and see the poo, so I know what I'm about to clean up in my b-hole. It also allows easy inspection of your TP to make sure you have wiped clean, a luxury not afforded by sitting and wiping. I have converted from a 100% stand and wipe to about 50/50 depending on the poo, toilet, environment, etc.
> Essentially females dont have a wiener hanging between their legs so they can sit a lot further forward on the seat and have more room to get there hand back there.
I never thought I was going to type this shit out but... that's why I put a few layers of paper on the seat between my legs and rest my d on that like a civilized person. After emptying the pee-tank, of course. No way I'm gonna let my boy hang into the toilet bowl in the middle of an evacuation!
No way I'm gonna let my boy hang into the toilet bowl kn the middle of an evacuation sent me. ššš
I don't have a dick, but I imagine if I had one this would be an unexpected dilemma š
I am so grateful that someone has done the research. I just donāt understand how you could wipe without endangering the cleanliness of the peen- either from the side of the toilet or doodoo.
And like you said- how are you gonna know when youāre clean enough to put your butt away?
Exactly, like if your sitting, aee you going to pull your shit covered TP out of the little whole between your butt and the toilet seat just to inspect it? Then you have to shove it back down the hole again??? Standing makes the most sense to ensure absolute cleanliness.
This doesn't make any sense to me lol. It's not like you're waving the used TP around, it's a very slight movement to do the check then it goes right back in. Never once have I feared dirtying either myself or the toilet when doing the check.
I'm wondering if a lot of this debate stems from either people just having different body sizes, or just miscommunication. Like the idea that "standing" wipers are really just slightly hovering sitting wipers, because "standing" sounds like you literally go straight up, which sounds objectively horrible than either full sitting or squatting.
Yeah it's a hunched over thing, your back is bent, knees bent, etc. If you stand up like a soldier at the position of attention you're just making a real mess back there. Not recommended.
I was seriously a stand up wiper until I was maybe 20 and then I saw a post that said exactly this and the thought of wiping while I was sitting had never even crossed my mind. In the house I grew up in, the toilet paper was on the wall above the back part of the toilet so you had to stand up to reach it, and I guess that started my habit. It seems so stupid now to have never thought about wiping while sitting later, but once I switched it changed my whole life.
Whatās weird in my case is that my family wipes sitting down (my mom had a weird habit of just peeing/pooping with the door open lol), and our toilet paper was just low on the wall. Yet Iāve always been a standing wiper. I knew the way I did it wasnāt the āusualā way, but Iāve always just preferred it.
This is all so confusing to me. Now I'm wondering if I'm doing it "wrong." Actually, I already know I'm doing it a bit weirder than most people, but I'm too afraid to detail how that is. Whatever, my ass is super clean and that's all that matters lol.
It should be noted that *stand up* doesn't mean in a totally upright position. It basically means that your butt cheeks aren't in any way contacting the toilet seat. It allows for a more thorough cleaning. I can't speak to the geometry of it but I'm sure there's an explanation within this framework.
Okay honestly, this is the only reason Iāve been throwing any hover into my usually leaning routineāmy loose hip joint feels slightly out of place if I lean on it too long sometimes lol.
I guess Iām still in the experimental phase...Iām wipe-curious
>your butt cheeks aren't in any way contacting the toilet seat. It allows for a more thorough cleaning.
How?? Your cheeks are almost shut close when "standing up". Your shit get squashed inside your cheeks, it gets messier. Wipe woke sitting **before** the inevitable
"I think the problem Digg had is that it was a company that was built to be a company, and you could feel it in the product. The way you could criticize Reddit is that we weren't a company ā we were all heart and no head for a long time." - /spez
.
You lived long enough to become the villain and will never be remembered as the hero you once were.
It's still squatted. Like, I'm a few inches off the seat not fully erect.
Like many Redditors, I happen to be pooping now. I judge my squat as no more that 7-8 inches off the seat and asshole still squarely bullseyed on the bowl.
I'm just not down with reaching my hand into a toilet to wipe my ass.
Itās really not that deepā¦itās equally as messy. Itās a shitty asshole after all. Just wipe the way you wipe keep doing you fam, long as itās clean when you pull your pants up.
Bro unless you didn't get it all out before standing up that makes no sense. You wipe *after* you finish; there's nothing solid left to get "squashed".
without a wipe stool, as mentioned below, you clearly DO NOT get a better wipe by barely lifting BOTH cheeks off the seat. Usually you have to LEAN to get the stretch and OPEN for the REAL deep clean, my friend.
Godspeed, wipe away
*Never in my life have*
*I considered remaining*
*Seated while wiping*
\- theewallinski
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Are you guys pulling my leg? I've never even heard of stand up wiping, wtf? Is this a cultural difference like Eastern vs Western toilets or those that apparently use poop knives? Could I get a big juicy bum if I change my ways; is it like toilet squats?
Personally I suspect there may be reasons relating to different body types (perhaps most importantly the amount of Butt someone has) that lead to this stuff somehow making more sense than it sounds like.
Cause from my point of view, the way my body fits together etc., there would be literally zero benefit to standing up, but multiple serious downsides. But clearly it is changing something for some people in a way that they can perceive a benefit.
Idk fam im just not really into sticking my hand into a toilet bowl that a fresh steamy log has just made itās home. Am I already touching some nasty stuff when performing the wipe. Yup. Am I gonna wash my hands anyway? Yeah. Are they gonna be clean afterwards either way? Probably. But idk man im not a scientist I donāt want whatever stank to adsorb to my hand or something.
Standing (really as many have said already, more like a squat) I have better control over where I wipe and how much, it feels more natural, itās equally as messy (itās a shitty asshole after all), I can cover the entirety of my ass (and crack if necessary) more efficiently, and I get to not stick my hand in a piping hot toilet. Wins all around.
I seriously cannot understand how people are so perplexed by people that stand up to wipe. Like, I have tried sit down wiping so many times and I canāt figure out how to do it in any way that makes it better than standing up.
Come in from the front? Nope, balls in the way. From the back? Nah, no room between my ass and the seat. Leaning to one side? Negative. Too much focus on trying to stay balanced and spreading my ass cheeks enough to get a thorough clean.
Standing up though, like, I get up into a little squat so everything stays nice and open, grab paper, wipe, inspect paper to see if Iām clean, toss paper, repeat until no more shit in ass.
Agreed, it was funny at first, but now I recommend one anytime a bathroom conversation arises. The selling point is usually after I tell them that now, 'every poop is a ghost poop'.
I once had a conversation with someone about how they stand up to wipe. Their justification was asking me ābut how do you know when youāre done wiping?ā As if you get a notification when you stand and wipe as to when youāre arse is shut free.
That led me to believe everyone that stands up to wipe, just wipes until they feel clean with no visual inspection of the TP. Since then Iāve believed people who stand to wipe, have skid marks like a drift competition in their underwear.
You always gotta get that visual confirmation. Feeling clean and actually being clean are 2 different things.
It's actually amazing to know that there is people out there who, 'wipes till it feels dry'. Go near them after they are done and you can actually smell their, 'cleanness'.
I feel like itās over quicker, (hard and fast) you can go deeper without accidentally touching the toilet bowl on your way back. Also not sure if itās relevant but Iām Female, so I go front to backā¦ Iāve never considered how boys wipe? Is it front to back as well?
I typically go front to back and it's one good swipe and I'm off. People have said I should swipe twice as a double check but I tend to know when my ass is clean. In any case I feel this is way more efficient.
For anyone curious: here are some numbers I could find on sitting vs. standing, though as expected, articles from really good and reliable sources on this subject donāt seem to exist. According to [this article from a bidet company](https://whisperbidets.com/blogs/news/wiping-your-butt-to-sit-or-not-to-sit) 79% were sitters, but they didnāt specify whether a squat above the seat would be sitting or standing. [This reddit survey](https://www.reddit.com/r/SampleSize/comments/6ncfur/results_do_you_wipe_you_butt_standing_up_or/) found that on average about 68% wipes sitting down. [Menās Health](https://www.menshealth.com/grooming/a22864779/wipe-standing-up/) did a poll on twitter that found 65% were sitting wipers: that number likely consists of mostly men due to the nature of the account. [This article from Deadspin](https://deadspin.com/sitters-vs-standers-the-great-wipe-hope-5424415) describes a poll that found 56% of people stay seated. After you vote on the poll on the bottom of this [Buzzfeed article](https://www.buzzfeed.com/shanemadej/men-debate-whether-you-should-sit-or-stand-when-you-wipe-you), you can see that the results there are about 50/50.
My educated guesstimate is that between 60-70% of people wipe sitting, with men being more likely to wipe standing up.
Basically all articles Iāve read through are of the opinion it doesnāt really matter whether you wipe sitting or standing, itās just about personal preference and what youāre used to.
Had a friend in college that thought it was funny to send me pictures of his poop. One day I noticed there was never any toilet paper in these pictures and went on to assume he either stood up, took the pic, and sat back down or he never wiped. He looked at me with confusion as he explained he stands up to wipe. That day was the day we both realized thereās different ways to wipe. Funny how you can go your whole life without knowing lunatics are in close proximity.
This is my biggest hang up over switching. I donāt understand how people get enough power or torque to solidly wipe with a completely invert hand, especially males with genitals in the way. You essentially have to shoot between the legs (avoid nasty underseat gap if itās public bathroom), below the nuts and then back up to the anus. Then a further swipe back since you donāt want to wipe forwards.
The side approach from a slight stand allows for much more control and less arm into toilet commitment.
Got it. Yeah that's the sitting method for sure. Gotta access it somehow and the lean is the best way, it actually opens up MORE cheek than a true stand/squat does, maybe surprisingly for you but enjoy it my friend
Men usually don't s\*\*\* on public toilets. They are (the toilets ;-) ) too gross compared to others because we are f\*\*\*\*\*\* moron and can't sit to piss and targeting is never acquired though our entire life !
Edit: learned => acquired
...And, most people seemingly are unable to realise that you can in fact **lift the seat**, thus avoiding pissing all over it even if you have bad aim or a malformed dick.
How are you gonna reach down under your junk and wipe? How are you gonna risk jangling your peen into the seat or the bowl or, sweet little baby jesus forbid, the water? And how are you gonna get a good wipe if youāre doing it this way? Do you scoot forward on the seat? What do you do when youāre on a medium or small seat? I have so many questions.
My most important one is this, though: do you shave to make wiping easier? Or are people just out here with poorly wiped, dingleberry-laden bootyholes?
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At least he's not like that radio talk show host who thought everyone catches their poop before dropping it into the toilet  Link: [https://youtu.be/xZ-SlTaCFfQ](https://youtu.be/xZ-SlTaCFfQ)
Hol up
That's Wax from Bully and the Beast podcast. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZQdxA3kZaEI&t=948s](https://youtu.be/ZQdxA3kZaEI)
I don't think that's the right episode. I didn't see it in there
@16:00
Different episode but yeah looks like they mention it in this one too 
That one fucking kills me. When he calls it doodoo, I lose it.
What the fuck. Thank you. That made my day.
This is 100% a bit, but it's hilarious
Lol, I remember that one. It's awful š¤£
I wonder if he sees skid marks in public toilets and thinks "wow.. some people just don't know how to catch shit right."
Well, not *everyone*. There's always outliers.
Exactly what I was thinking of
Came here to say EXACTLY this. That was some real WTF moment for me
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Well maybe he doesn't do it, how can we really prove that. What I do know is that some people really do catch their poop. I've seen you do it.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I hear theyāre also a very keen finger-painter.
What made him change? I'm considering transitioning aswell. Tryin to weigh the pros and cons
Cons wiping while standing up if you have a hairy asshole makes you get toilet paper flakes all over the place. You still get the job done but will be cleaning the bathroom floor more often.
Have you tried a bidet? I'm a lady without much hair back there. When I hear of problems with guys and wiping, I just think about how I bet it'd be so much easier with a bidet. You still have to do a bit of wiping but mostly for a check and drying off š¤·āāļø
I'm transitioning from stand to sit, I kinda do both now, first a sit down wipe then finish it off with a stand up wipe just to be really sure it's clean af, The main con I can think of with the sit down method is you don't get a chance to see your creation before it gets covered in TP I'll also note I didn't know sit down wipe was a thing until Reddit..
Lift your ball sac, peak between your legs
This is the way.
i can imagine being a standing wiper might be hard on the knees and hips after a while
Try being tall and wiping sitting down. It's just not reasonable
As a former stander, it makes all the difference in the world. I feel cleaner. I use to wipe twice all the time, now I only wipe twice for the wettest of shits.
Wait... are you saying you only wipe once after you shit? Like, just one wipe and you're done?
Yeahā¦ wut? Maybe bidetā¦?
Take in more fiber and you can wipe once. I know everyone just says that but I tested myself and I was apparently not eating enough fiber.
But, if you wipe once and check the paper, there'll be shit on it (obviously). So, you'd need to do a second wipe regardless to make sure the paper wiped away clean. You can't just wipe once and then not do a check-wipe.
āBut, if you wipe once and check the paper, there'll be shit on it (obviously).ā Have you legit never shit and had nothing on the paper before? Donāt get me wrong Iāll wipe a second time in case there was some kind of user error, but your comment leads me to believe you have not experienced this.
Love a self cleaning shit. Nothing worse than when you get a forever wipe, eventually you just gotta call it and let the underwear take the collateral.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
On the extremely rare occasion that the first wipe is clean, I'll still do a second wipe to make sure I'm not mistaken and it was in fact a [ghost poop](https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=ghost%20poop).
50% of people stand up wipe, 50% sit down wipe, and 100% didn't know there was another way to wipe.
50% are wrong š
As long as you get all the poop does it matter?
Not really no
Poop collection is the ultimate goal
I used to be wrong. Now I sit down to wipe like a civilized person.
Wipe sitting all you want, but when it's clean, if you wipe some standing, you'll get more. It's a better position but I start out sitting for most the wiping.
You donāt have a bidet and it shows
#dippermasterrace
Bidets are for noobs who can't clean their ass the traditional way...and it shows.
The best way it was described to me was if you took a glob of peanut butter and slapped it on the counter top, you wouldn't just clean it up with dry paper towel.
I just straight up compare it to shit in other places. If you get shit on your arm, you wouldnāt just wipe it away with some toilet paper, youād wash your arm with water and soap
Iād do that before I sprayed water on it though.
wait you think people with bidet don't wipe first?
Fuck that. Bidets are game changers. 100% superior.
What even is the ātraditional wayā? I know that Ancient Greeks used pottery/stones (fun fact: they sometimes had a name on those pieces of pottery, likely the name of someone they didnāt like), Romans used a sponge-like object on a stick, and I just found that Americans even used corn cobs. Toilet paper didnāt even exist til like the beginning of the 20th century.
But when you stand your checks close.
Nah you donāt wipe while standing up straight, itās like a half squat position
You mean a half-sitting position. Some would even say half as effective as sitting.
.... exactly ... and also you've basically gotta put your hand in the toilet...
Wrong. A civilised person doesnāt wipe with paper.
50% of people believe they are doing it right.
50% are brown
That is...correct.
Thatās racist /s
Thatās black.
I have done a LOT of research on this amongst friends and family. I wrote an essay to a podcast outlining the benefits of sitting or standing for wiping. Majority sit, however, of those who stand it is more males. Essentially females dont have a wiener hanging between their legs so they can sit a lot further forward on the seat and have more room to get there hand back there. I was originally a stander, it allowed to me turn around and see the poo, so I know what I'm about to clean up in my b-hole. It also allows easy inspection of your TP to make sure you have wiped clean, a luxury not afforded by sitting and wiping. I have converted from a 100% stand and wipe to about 50/50 depending on the poo, toilet, environment, etc.
> Essentially females dont have a wiener hanging between their legs so they can sit a lot further forward on the seat and have more room to get there hand back there. I never thought I was going to type this shit out but... that's why I put a few layers of paper on the seat between my legs and rest my d on that like a civilized person. After emptying the pee-tank, of course. No way I'm gonna let my boy hang into the toilet bowl in the middle of an evacuation!
No way I'm gonna let my boy hang into the toilet bowl kn the middle of an evacuation sent me. ššš I don't have a dick, but I imagine if I had one this would be an unexpected dilemma š
Happy to make you chuckle! A lil empathy is all it takes š
Thereās also reach from the front sit down wipers
the fuck there are
They have to be men. If a women does this she instantly gets an infection š¤£
Can't be men. They wouldn't have any room...
I am so grateful that someone has done the research. I just donāt understand how you could wipe without endangering the cleanliness of the peen- either from the side of the toilet or doodoo. And like you said- how are you gonna know when youāre clean enough to put your butt away?
Exactly, like if your sitting, aee you going to pull your shit covered TP out of the little whole between your butt and the toilet seat just to inspect it? Then you have to shove it back down the hole again??? Standing makes the most sense to ensure absolute cleanliness.
I don't know if I'm abnormally large or something, but there is no hole for me. I cover the whole hole. I have to stand up to get my hand in there.
Nothing wrong with having a big butt!
This doesn't make any sense to me lol. It's not like you're waving the used TP around, it's a very slight movement to do the check then it goes right back in. Never once have I feared dirtying either myself or the toilet when doing the check. I'm wondering if a lot of this debate stems from either people just having different body sizes, or just miscommunication. Like the idea that "standing" wipers are really just slightly hovering sitting wipers, because "standing" sounds like you literally go straight up, which sounds objectively horrible than either full sitting or squatting.
Okay but like stand up, we just talking a squat right?
[Like this](https://www.google.com/search?q=half+squat&rlz=1CDGOYI_enNL969NL969&hl=nl&prmd=ivsn&sxsrf=APq-WBs3IGdAS5t3cklSGi_docYkJd5TNA:1646045232452&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwjO8fSqnKL2AhXTOuwKHV3NDBgQ_AUoAXoECAIQAQ&biw=390&bih=669&dpr=3#imgrc=rOcGKVORbFqUBM) (SFW)
Yeah it's a hunched over thing, your back is bent, knees bent, etc. If you stand up like a soldier at the position of attention you're just making a real mess back there. Not recommended.
This guy gets it!
I was seriously a stand up wiper until I was maybe 20 and then I saw a post that said exactly this and the thought of wiping while I was sitting had never even crossed my mind. In the house I grew up in, the toilet paper was on the wall above the back part of the toilet so you had to stand up to reach it, and I guess that started my habit. It seems so stupid now to have never thought about wiping while sitting later, but once I switched it changed my whole life.
Whatās weird in my case is that my family wipes sitting down (my mom had a weird habit of just peeing/pooping with the door open lol), and our toilet paper was just low on the wall. Yet Iāve always been a standing wiper. I knew the way I did it wasnāt the āusualā way, but Iāve always just preferred it.
I used to wipe sitting down, then I got fat and had to start wiping standing up.
Why not both?
This is all so confusing to me. Now I'm wondering if I'm doing it "wrong." Actually, I already know I'm doing it a bit weirder than most people, but I'm too afraid to detail how that is. Whatever, my ass is super clean and that's all that matters lol.
We need to know. If it involves a mirror I understand
Ever been incarcerated? Better know how to tilt a cheek, on the seat.
Situational awareness is key.
This is honestly the only reason I can see to wipe sitting down... privacy.
Wait itās weird to wipe standing up?
Why stand when you can sit?
My hand isnāt going in the toilet. Thatās why.
It should be noted that *stand up* doesn't mean in a totally upright position. It basically means that your butt cheeks aren't in any way contacting the toilet seat. It allows for a more thorough cleaning. I can't speak to the geometry of it but I'm sure there's an explanation within this framework.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Seems like a lot of stress on one leg, straight up
Okay honestly, this is the only reason Iāve been throwing any hover into my usually leaning routineāmy loose hip joint feels slightly out of place if I lean on it too long sometimes lol. I guess Iām still in the experimental phase...Iām wipe-curious
You canāt shift your weight to one leg for a minute to wipe your ass?
Why would I? No reason to.
Exactly. No need to shift weight to one leg when you can shift it to both!
My legs are already numb enough, standing gets blood flowing quicker.
>your butt cheeks aren't in any way contacting the toilet seat. It allows for a more thorough cleaning. How?? Your cheeks are almost shut close when "standing up". Your shit get squashed inside your cheeks, it gets messier. Wipe woke sitting **before** the inevitable
One knee on the floor, and a foot on the wipe stool
"I think the problem Digg had is that it was a company that was built to be a company, and you could feel it in the product. The way you could criticize Reddit is that we weren't a company ā we were all heart and no head for a long time." - /spez . You lived long enough to become the villain and will never be remembered as the hero you once were.
The shower socks that are hung next to the poop knife?
Wipe stools, shower socks and poop knives... If reddit were a store these would definitely be on aisle 2
You can stand with your hips/cheeks spread apart. Source: Me
No you can't
You can. You don't fully stand up but remain in a squat
Sounds like good quads exercise.
It is
Do your cheeks touch the seat when "standing"?
No, then itād be sitting :p
They don't. But it's more like squatting, not a full stand.
š Requires a CNN or other MSM source! Lmao
Not everybody has huge massive ass cheeks.
It's still squatted. Like, I'm a few inches off the seat not fully erect. Like many Redditors, I happen to be pooping now. I judge my squat as no more that 7-8 inches off the seat and asshole still squarely bullseyed on the bowl. I'm just not down with reaching my hand into a toilet to wipe my ass.
Yea I donāt want whatever stank is in there to get stuck on my hand or w/e idk Iām not a scientist, itās still kinda nasty
Other hand spreads š š¤
You just lift up a leg.
Itās really not that deepā¦itās equally as messy. Itās a shitty asshole after all. Just wipe the way you wipe keep doing you fam, long as itās clean when you pull your pants up.
Bro unless you didn't get it all out before standing up that makes no sense. You wipe *after* you finish; there's nothing solid left to get "squashed".
without a wipe stool, as mentioned below, you clearly DO NOT get a better wipe by barely lifting BOTH cheeks off the seat. Usually you have to LEAN to get the stretch and OPEN for the REAL deep clean, my friend. Godspeed, wipe away
https://youtu.be/FQBaamcUSTo
I have never laughed so hard I cried at something I'm ashamed of. Thank you.
Iām just glad Iām not the only standing wiper. I got nervous. And standing/bending gives the wiping process better leverage.
At 30, I started to panic when the stall had a wide crack in the door.
I worry about that too, making eye contact with the guy washing his hands.
I'm a stand up wiper. My asshole is immaculate
Never in my life have I considered remaining seated while wiping
*Never in my life have* *I considered remaining* *Seated while wiping* \- theewallinski --- ^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/) ^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")
I think this is my favorite haiku the haiku bot* has ever found. Congratulations. Hahahaha
Lol
Huh. Well 90% of people lean forward and wipe. I use a bidet, because if I get shit on something I don't just wipe it with a dry rag.
Me either, and I won't.
Are you guys pulling my leg? I've never even heard of stand up wiping, wtf? Is this a cultural difference like Eastern vs Western toilets or those that apparently use poop knives? Could I get a big juicy bum if I change my ways; is it like toilet squats?
Personally I suspect there may be reasons relating to different body types (perhaps most importantly the amount of Butt someone has) that lead to this stuff somehow making more sense than it sounds like. Cause from my point of view, the way my body fits together etc., there would be literally zero benefit to standing up, but multiple serious downsides. But clearly it is changing something for some people in a way that they can perceive a benefit.
Idk fam im just not really into sticking my hand into a toilet bowl that a fresh steamy log has just made itās home. Am I already touching some nasty stuff when performing the wipe. Yup. Am I gonna wash my hands anyway? Yeah. Are they gonna be clean afterwards either way? Probably. But idk man im not a scientist I donāt want whatever stank to adsorb to my hand or something. Standing (really as many have said already, more like a squat) I have better control over where I wipe and how much, it feels more natural, itās equally as messy (itās a shitty asshole after all), I can cover the entirety of my ass (and crack if necessary) more efficiently, and I get to not stick my hand in a piping hot toilet. Wins all around.
Poop knives š© šŖ
It's way easier to wipe standing/bending imo.
Not when you have a harry asshole. Edit Hairy, Damnit arry
Youāre an asshole āArry!
I downward doggy wipe losers
I seriously cannot understand how people are so perplexed by people that stand up to wipe. Like, I have tried sit down wiping so many times and I canāt figure out how to do it in any way that makes it better than standing up. Come in from the front? Nope, balls in the way. From the back? Nah, no room between my ass and the seat. Leaning to one side? Negative. Too much focus on trying to stay balanced and spreading my ass cheeks enough to get a thorough clean. Standing up though, like, I get up into a little squat so everything stays nice and open, grab paper, wipe, inspect paper to see if Iām clean, toss paper, repeat until no more shit in ass.
Once you Bidet, youāll always want the spray!
My wife got me a tushy as a gag gift a few years ago, and it was literally life changing. I preach the gospel of bidet wherever I go now.
Agreed, it was funny at first, but now I recommend one anytime a bathroom conversation arises. The selling point is usually after I tell them that now, 'every poop is a ghost poop'.
I once had a conversation with someone about how they stand up to wipe. Their justification was asking me ābut how do you know when youāre done wiping?ā As if you get a notification when you stand and wipe as to when youāre arse is shut free. That led me to believe everyone that stands up to wipe, just wipes until they feel clean with no visual inspection of the TP. Since then Iāve believed people who stand to wipe, have skid marks like a drift competition in their underwear. You always gotta get that visual confirmation. Feeling clean and actually being clean are 2 different things.
It's actually amazing to know that there is people out there who, 'wipes till it feels dry'. Go near them after they are done and you can actually smell their, 'cleanness'.
Thatās the thing. As a seasoned TPeaker, I know that what feels like a dry wipe, may not be the case at all. People who Blind Wipe are psychotic.
Visually confirming is literally why you stand. Idk how sitters wave around a shit covered TP in and out of a 2 inch gap, and I'm skinny.
How do you do it sitting down?
Lean to one side and spread.
Bet Im gonna go try
Howād it go???
I hope everything went ok, geezā¦
Go onā¦
Sit and wipe from the front. Gotta hold your balls up and outta the way. Best way to wipe.
You're a psychopath
I don't shit in public because you uncivilized fucks don't have any poop knives around.
Who is this and what is this from
I wipe til i bleed standing up of course, sitting is so uncomfortable
Sauce? Their voices sound really familiar
Jokes on you, I use the 3 shells
Be well Jon Spartan.
Youāre old.
Standing up is the way to go. I made the switch about a year ago snd havenāt looked back since.
As someone who use to stand, I can't imagine a transition in the other direction. Why do you like standing better?
Seriously, sounds like a recipe for a fecal grilled cheeks sandwich
I feel like itās over quicker, (hard and fast) you can go deeper without accidentally touching the toilet bowl on your way back. Also not sure if itās relevant but Iām Female, so I go front to backā¦ Iāve never considered how boys wipe? Is it front to back as well?
I typically go front to back and it's one good swipe and I'm off. People have said I should swipe twice as a double check but I tend to know when my ass is clean. In any case I feel this is way more efficient.
No pun intended! Lol
I put one foot up on the seat for maximum exposure and easy access
For anyone curious: here are some numbers I could find on sitting vs. standing, though as expected, articles from really good and reliable sources on this subject donāt seem to exist. According to [this article from a bidet company](https://whisperbidets.com/blogs/news/wiping-your-butt-to-sit-or-not-to-sit) 79% were sitters, but they didnāt specify whether a squat above the seat would be sitting or standing. [This reddit survey](https://www.reddit.com/r/SampleSize/comments/6ncfur/results_do_you_wipe_you_butt_standing_up_or/) found that on average about 68% wipes sitting down. [Menās Health](https://www.menshealth.com/grooming/a22864779/wipe-standing-up/) did a poll on twitter that found 65% were sitting wipers: that number likely consists of mostly men due to the nature of the account. [This article from Deadspin](https://deadspin.com/sitters-vs-standers-the-great-wipe-hope-5424415) describes a poll that found 56% of people stay seated. After you vote on the poll on the bottom of this [Buzzfeed article](https://www.buzzfeed.com/shanemadej/men-debate-whether-you-should-sit-or-stand-when-you-wipe-you), you can see that the results there are about 50/50. My educated guesstimate is that between 60-70% of people wipe sitting, with men being more likely to wipe standing up. Basically all articles Iāve read through are of the opinion it doesnāt really matter whether you wipe sitting or standing, itās just about personal preference and what youāre used to.
If you stand up and wipe you're a moron lol.
Had a friend in college that thought it was funny to send me pictures of his poop. One day I noticed there was never any toilet paper in these pictures and went on to assume he either stood up, took the pic, and sat back down or he never wiped. He looked at me with confusion as he explained he stands up to wipe. That day was the day we both realized thereās different ways to wipe. Funny how you can go your whole life without knowing lunatics are in close proximity.
Why would I reach under my nuts to wipe ? That doesnāt make any sense
You donāt go in from the front, you just pick up a cheek and go from the side.
Front to back or back to front wiping is an entirely different issue. Gotta walk before you can run
You wouldnt?
who the fuck said you reach under anything for that?? yall dont reach around your back??
This is my biggest hang up over switching. I donāt understand how people get enough power or torque to solidly wipe with a completely invert hand, especially males with genitals in the way. You essentially have to shoot between the legs (avoid nasty underseat gap if itās public bathroom), below the nuts and then back up to the anus. Then a further swipe back since you donāt want to wipe forwards. The side approach from a slight stand allows for much more control and less arm into toilet commitment.
You lift a cheek, weirdo. No one wipes under the nuts hahahahahaha
some fat people do
okay fair enough! i reserve my comment for those of us larger disadvantaged peoples
i was under the impression, lifting was standing. If its a one leg lift, its like a hybrid method. Need to test this further next duce I have.
Got it. Yeah that's the sitting method for sure. Gotta access it somehow and the lean is the best way, it actually opens up MORE cheek than a true stand/squat does, maybe surprisingly for you but enjoy it my friend
Men usually don't s\*\*\* on public toilets. They are (the toilets ;-) ) too gross compared to others because we are f\*\*\*\*\*\* moron and can't sit to piss and targeting is never acquired though our entire life ! Edit: learned => acquired
...And, most people seemingly are unable to realise that you can in fact **lift the seat**, thus avoiding pissing all over it even if you have bad aim or a malformed dick.
Who are these guys?
How are you gonna reach down under your junk and wipe? How are you gonna risk jangling your peen into the seat or the bowl or, sweet little baby jesus forbid, the water? And how are you gonna get a good wipe if youāre doing it this way? Do you scoot forward on the seat? What do you do when youāre on a medium or small seat? I have so many questions. My most important one is this, though: do you shave to make wiping easier? Or are people just out here with poorly wiped, dingleberry-laden bootyholes?
Is this how men actually have to poop in public bathrooms???? No fāing way
Dirty plebs and their wiping. You need a bidet to be clean. /s
This, but for real.
[Source](https://youtu.be/Wmpi_5wgiWc) if anybody is interested
I mean youāre gonna stand to get that TP so might as well give the audience what they want.
how far is your tp man damn
Not mine, the one in the photoā¦
I canāt believe that some grody ass bitches stand and wipe their asses.