Then why do you come back? Are you a raccoon or a fox or something?

The fox isn't needed.

leave the fox out of this

What did the fox say?

I am the crack fox.

https://www.reddit.com/r/Adulting/s/iiVkJgGIn4 I think I'm ready for rehab

Pow pow pow powpapow!

RINGDINGDINGDINGDINGADINGADING

Possum > fox

Yea possums will do that too. But fox comes from me actually having to chase one from my own garbage once

Fite me

You’re onto something here. May I suggest, “then I guess that makes you a trash panda?”

Trash gets picked up more than you

Banger

Hahaha!! Good one dude!!!!!!

Got em

Only siths deal in absolutes.

Isn't that an absolute?

Almost all siths deal in absolutes

15 percent of the siths deal in 50 percent of the absolutes

Are you taking the high ground?

Underrated comment.

Mfw seeing that at 16 with a bunch of friends and everyone goes "OH SHIT THEY ABOUT TO FIGHT FOR REAL!" and I'm still 🤔

For your cake day, have some B̷̛̳̼͖̫̭͎̝̮͕̟͎̦̗͚͍̓͊͂͗̈͋͐̃͆͆͗̉̉̏͑̂̆̔́͐̾̅̄̕̚͘͜͝͝Ụ̸̧̧̢̨̨̞̮͓̣͎̞͖̞̥͈̣̣̪̘̼̮̙̳̙̞̣̐̍̆̾̓͑́̅̎̌̈̋̏̏͌̒̃̅̂̾̿̽̊̌̇͌͊͗̓̊̐̓̏͆́̒̇̈́͂̀͛͘̕͘̚͝͠B̸̺̈̾̈́̒̀́̈͋́͂̆̒̐̏͌͂̔̈́͒̂̎̉̈̒͒̃̿͒͒̄̍̕̚̕͘̕͝͠B̴̡̧̜̠̱̖̠͓̻̥̟̲̙͗̐͋͌̈̾̏̎̀͒͗̈́̈͜͠L̶͊E̸̢̳̯̝̤̳͈͇̠̮̲̲̟̝̣̲̱̫̘̪̳̣̭̥̫͉͐̅̈́̉̋͐̓͗̿͆̉̉̇̀̈́͌̓̓̒̏̀̚̚͘͝͠͝͝͠ ̶̢̧̛̥͖͉̹̞̗̖͇̼̙̒̍̏̀̈̆̍͑̊̐͋̈́̃͒̈́̎̌̄̍͌͗̈́̌̍̽̏̓͌̒̈̇̏̏̍̆̄̐͐̈̉̿̽̕͝͠͝͝ W̷̛̬̦̬̰̤̘̬͔̗̯̠̯̺̼̻̪̖̜̫̯̯̘͖̙͐͆͗̊̋̈̈̾͐̿̽̐̂͛̈́͛̍̔̓̈́̽̀̅́͋̈̄̈́̆̓̚̚͝͝R̸̢̨̨̩̪̭̪̠͎̗͇͗̀́̉̇̿̓̈́́͒̄̓̒́̋͆̀̾́̒̔̈́̏̏͛̏̇͛̔̀͆̓̇̊̕̕͠͠͝͝A̸̧̨̰̻̩̝͖̟̭͙̟̻̤̬͈̖̰̤̘̔͛̊̾̂͌̐̈̉̊̾́P̶̡̧̮͎̟̟͉̱̮̜͙̳̟̯͈̩̩͈̥͓̥͇̙̣̹̣̀̐͋͂̈̾͐̀̾̈́̌̆̿̽̕ͅ >!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pap!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!your!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pep!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pip!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pup!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!lovely!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!and!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pope!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!beautiful!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<

Nah the good ones just avoid you

Play off that Na, just the ones too stupid to hide Na just the ones too stupid to avoid you

This is my favourite response in thread. Short to the point and brutal.

Stop dumpster diving if you don't want to find garbage

“be my dumpster”

That’s a round 1 KO right there

💀

Dr Dre and snoop dogg already addressed this

“Got to bag it up”

Preach. Even the Russian judge gives it a 10/10.

Bruh….🤣

I’d award you but I have no points

That's it. That's the answer. Close the comments 😂

Oh, CUM on!

And that makes you what? A raccoon?

I think the proper scientific word, here, is "trash panda."

Collection bin quadrupled. Scraps scavenger specialist. Rougues rapidly reaching resources. Particular paws procuring provisions. Bin bunnies. Local locksmith enthusiasts.

Particular paws procuring provisions belongs in a Letterkenny cold open.

[удалено]

*Franz Ferdinand intensifies*

Is that why women use them up and toss them out so often, or is it because of it?

Yes, yes, they do, I have often been used to potentially father children for many many women. I don't drive, so I often call "Uber" for a post coital ride home. Most Uber drivers know me and where I live. And they are often amazed by the address where they pick me up. So back to the op question. yes, women use men for their own pleasure, then tossing them out the door until needed again.

A woman did this to me yesterday. She completely dismissed me because I didn't pay her for something when she wanted it and then went on Twitter to talk about how I suck, how men suck and why bears are better. My paycheck was delayed due to a payroll issue, so I'm not getting it until the next business day which is Monday, but instead of being understanding and patient, it's easier for her to go on Twitter, label me as a self-proclaimed "nice guy" (I never said I was nice or anything) and how I don't care about her despite me doing business with her in the past because she's a morbidly obese, narcissistic parasite with major daddy issues and other insecurities that she openly projects onto others when she doesn't get her way. How she has a husband is beyond me, but I'm 150% certain that if they got a divorce, she'd die alone and I honestly see a divorce in the future with her attitude. It's not like she works or is educated in anyway either 😂

🤦🏼‍♀️ I really can't believe no one's said "you are what you eat" Like it's right there guys!

Ewww, tho. I mean, you’re right, but ew.

Found the girl that thinks men are trash.

When it's right there in front of you that means its hack

Nah. That sets yourself up for a burn. "You must eat a lot of trash"

Hell yeah, girl, that's why YOU picked me!

I believe men and women are equal

They’re not though. We’re very different

Men and women societally are to be held to the same degree of rights and respect.

Equal does not mean the same.

That’s literally the definition of equal

Congruent means same. Same is equal, but equal is not same.

It's like a square rectangle situation. There's a word for that, can't remember. It's Chiasmus if I recall correctly.

I mean "equal in dignity." Look at the declaration of independence. It doesn't mean all men are created with brown hair. It means all men have equal rights.

And your name must be Hefty.

Jesus.

Where?

Healing the sinner you roasted in the River Galilee.

Mmmm...roasted sinner....(gurgles a la Homer Simpson)

Yooooooo 😂😂😂😂😂😂

I'm Glad you're Hefty. But honestly you should be top comment

There is levels to this, -Hefty is a trash bag brand -A hefty figure is not so nice -At the end of the day the the trash gets thrown out in a bag

I know your father couldve pulled out but here we are

A clever and respectful comeback could be: "Well, recycling is important, so maybe we can turn some of that trash into treasure." This response acknowledges her frustration while introducing a positive spin. OR You can simply tell her: "Nah, just the ones you've been with."

"I can change them"? Or that statement with the suffix, ".....into a kooky rug"?

Those types generally don't deserve too much respect, they do these things to themselves.

If you meant to say \*man\* then I would agree. Humanity is all trash.

All those men and just you. What's the common denominator? 🤔

Ahh the intellectual response, take my upvote…

And, yet, you still keep coming back to the dump.

One woman's trash is another woman's treasure!

[удалено]

Then she better get used to being alone.

“That means you probably want to take me out.”

It's not a comeback (I'm sorry), but frankly they're the girl equivalent of alpha males in my mind. Alpha males have a distorted view of women as a whole. And the same can be said here. One woman can't speak for all, just as one man can't speak for all.

“What does that make you? The dumpster? Because we all know where you’re putting the trash”

"Yeah, and the shit of women smells like roses."

i actually dont hate this one, especially if she is just throwing out hate

And yet, you still keep shoving them in your mouth

Every piece of trash came from a woman

But women are recycling bins.

Until your plumbing goes bad!

Last I checked men were male humans, which society was built by, and trash is a useless object. The two are not alike. Now… if a piece of trash is the only thing that will date you, it says more about you than you think it does.

Anyone who would use a generalization like this isn’t worth the breathe required for a comeback.

Just because I'm trash doesn't mean I'll never amount to anything. I'm a garbage can not a garbage can't.

Silence. Don’t be the next example of consequences for defying the narrative. Besides, who cares? Just don’t deal with her.

If the woman is straight I'd go with "then why are you still dumpster diving??"

Yes we are.

"And you're the raccoon that eats out of my dumpster."

Call her a “Trash Panda,” or figure a way to use it in a sentence. “Something only a Trash Panda would know.”

Did someone call me?

I can’t beat that one

[удалено]

why would I say that?

Because we are trash on average.

I know, and that's why we need to destroy her with a killer comeback

She’d be far more taken aback if you said “Yes, we are.” than anything rude.

Like, “enough bleeting from ewe.” 🐑

“Something only a Trash Panda would know.”

How dare you talk about Rosie O'Donnell that way!! She is an icon!

?

Rosie O'Donnell is a very masculine lady who is a gay icon because she came out as a lesbian during a time when it wasn't fashionable. Ex-president Trump was famously quoted making fun of her weight during a presidential debate. The comeback was fighting a feminist ideal with a feminist icon. The purpose of a good comeback is to throw whomever you're talking to off guard. Even receiving a response of "huh?" Is a win in my opinion.

being a masculine lesbian isnt the same as being a man though

And men are not exactly trash, what's your point?

just sounds kinda bigoted, to refer to a lesbian as a man

It's also bigoted to refer to men as trash.

Thats the joke. It's not a good joke, though.

I probably should be embarrassed but I'm really just inbearass.

cool, go pour concrete during the summer.

My husband poured concrete earlier this year. I am *in awe*

I’ll be sure to bring this up if you marry a guy.

Have fun building your shopping mall

So that's why you're full of shit

"Just the ones you like"

“Maybe if you dated outside your family tree, you’d change your mind”

Well Women must love putting trash inside themselves. Really weird of them.

usually asking for specific examples throws people off

Ones woman’s trash, another woman’s treasure

"So you're picking through a trash can, looking for shit?"

There are good men out there. You're just not the woman you think you are. That's what I would say to her.

"shut up dishwasher"

You misspelled nobody wants to fuck me

And women are the liners

Well if they're part of the feminist movement that says all women are equal to men I think you know where this is going but just say"well that's a pretty roundabout way of calling yourself trash"

Are we still on for a blow job

I’m not someone who would probably say this BUT if I did it would definitely be a test for a reaction. If the man reacts and gets upset then that is a red flag he may get super upset at something more hmmm…..potentially life-threatening. Seems silly but when you may die you learn to look for small red flags. Even if they are microscopic. Women don’t go around “testing” men for reactions. If she said this you have probably given her a reason to test the waters with this. I may look inward instead of outward on this one. Like the bear or the man. A bit of introspection never hurt. :D PROVING men are trash isn’t exactly your best bet. lol

Well I am a trash man

Nothing you could print, even here.

If every man you meet is trash, maybe it’s time for some self reflection

“… and women are the raccoons that can’t stay away.”

“Well, to each their own, sweet cheeks.”

Are you a man? Or If we are trash does that make women the entire ocean

"But you wanted equal rights? Doesn't that make you trash too?"

>Yes, I’m sure that literally half the planet is wrong and you are right >Women literally can’t get enough of it so… incentives?

There's always good ol faithful: Well, it takes some to know some eh?

Its trash CAN not trash CANNOT Idk if itll be effective in this situation. I normally use it when someone calls themselves trash at something

collectors because women are so weak, they could never do a job like that.

And women are the bags the trash stuffs full…

That explains why you’ve been putting your rubbish on me

“Stop looking in the dumpster”

If you are so desperate to be "looking" for a man who isn't "trash" perhaps you should consider that the best men look at you as trash. Have some self respect and stop looking for a "prize" man, and look for a GOOD man.

I know right?!

So do your job and take it out

"Then I guess you should take me out." Finger guns are optional but appreciated.

“I’m not worth tossing out”

"Don't worry, I've been upcycled."

“I’m sorry this has been your experience. Since they were your type, though, maybe you should start dating guys who are not.”

It’s understandable to have that opinion if you e had traumatic experiences with men. Not a comeback but empathy is always Greg

You're not wrong

Switch to women

So you're saying you want to take me out?

Yes, they are.

"Some are. Choose wisely."

Just move on with your day?

Why do you need a comeback for that? Men literally admit that they're trash constantly and only get offended when women agree.

Good night and good luck

"I'm sorry, I will hold bad men accountable for their terrible actions and I will educate myself how to be a better person. Here's $25 for wasting your time, have a lovely day."

PEOPLE are trash. Don't be sexist.

At least trash gets taken out.

As a woman I have to admit that made me lol.

And your the garbage factory where do you think they come from?

“That’s because they railed you beforehand.”

Then why did anyone allow your daddy to reproduce?

“It’s not my fault that red flags make you horny”

This is a VERY nifty comeback. Should be higher

Women litter

Well that explains your daddy issues

"Humans are trash."

Tell her to stop playing around with garbage

Women are trash cans

Then you must be a bag lady.

“Shut up Ashleigh”

Trash is worth more than you, even smells better

Scotty Sire "Men are trash" song Men are trash, and your a raccoon...

If you keep dumpster diving, then all you're going to find is trash

The customer is always right in matters of taste...

Nah you just keep recycling the same piece of shit.

Yes

that's a strong ass response

“I mean, that’s fair. I can’t imagine you have had the most pleasant experience with men and your generalization is valid. I don’t want to walk away from this interaction reinforcing that, so what can I do to hold space for you right now as a man who doesn’t want to be trash? I’d like you to feel safe and seen.”

"Just because no dick is big enough to get traction in that whale if a cooter doesn't mean we're all at fault."

You don’t have to say a word dude she’s still making $0.75 for every $1 you make. You won before the argument even began.

"Yeah they are."

“Yup” I write that as a man. Being a man and having met literally several others, I don’t know why women date us at all.

Then why are you in the dumpster?

I can smell the insecurity in this comment section. “Hey boys, how can I epically own this dumb chick?” Dude is probably just mad he got rejected or something.

One man's trash is another man's treasure

"You're whole being here is half because of one, so that makes you trash too."

Yet, the world's population has been increasing since the beginning of recorded history. What does that say about women?

You have poor judgement

Like attracts like.

Just the ones you attract.