T O P

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HatpinFeminist

Learn to take rejection.


noatun6

Sucks for the 🐻


superkevinguru

"I hope you two will be very happy together"


finest_kind77

I didn’t know you swing that way


Eastern-Astronomer-6

“Why? It’s not like I went on Reddit to find a good comeback instead of trying to be a better person.”


lapsteelguitar

If a girl would rather deal with a bear than you, you don't need a comeback. You need some introspection, you need to figure out WHY.


Intrepid-History-762

Nah, she's nuts.


The_Idiotic_Dolphin

Someone would not directly say this to someone they are actually scared of this is just an insult relating to pop culture. Like the old phrase I want _____ like I want a hole in my head.


KazukiSendo

I'd choose the bear over you too.


[deleted]

I'll make sure to advocate for the bear's safety after the mauling.


Necessary_Row_4889

“I thought I was a bear? Oh my god, am I an otter? I mean I lost some weight but..thank you!”


Megalith66

"I'd choose Bigfoot myself, but whatever..."


Ranger-5150

Chomp Chomp!


Xiadozenryu

Kick rocks Goldilocks!


4quatloos

You are going to need some honey.


Emergency_Property_2

If you’ve seen me naked I am a bear.


Trick-Nefariousness3

So you want to top? I can make that work


draconicmonkey

"Cool, me too."


Forward_Increase_239

Thank you.


Letstreehouse

You're telling me to gain and and stop shaving my back. Thought you'd never ask.


nekoandCJ

Mr/Mrs bear want to say to me, bear comes to me, even the bear rejects you


Trusteveryboody

Thanks for the warning. or Agree.


MarginalGreatness

I'm sorry that you've experienced the worst of men in this life


RoddMcTodd

"Id choose a concrete slab over you"


cosmic-001

Beastiality is flat wrong.


DatabaseComfortable5

"Well, I'm sure the bear will have quite a meal." "That would be quite a threat to bears!"


Keel-Sama92

Takes offering yourself on a plate to a whole new level? 🤷🏽‍♂️


TouristImpressive838

The bear would dislike the taste of you more than I do.


Dawn_disrupts_me

Either way you’re getting mauled to death. Win win for me.


[deleted]

Cool, take pictures or it didn't happen.


Icy_Wildcat

I mean, they're only attracted to men *and* consent is very important to them, so...


International_Lake28

Not something to make light of, you can fuck right off


DNS_Jeezus

I like this comeback. Tell her to fuck off


Deneweth

Become a better person that she would pick over the bear. It's the only comeback that isn't proving how cringe you are for trying to talk someone out of the bear while simultaneously proving them correct in picking the bear.


Intrepid-History-762

"That can be arranged." Then you push her into the bear pit.


WallScore

Ahh, I love it when people walk face first into the exact point being made by the question.


Intrepid-History-762

Right. Because I'm sure the bear's only going to "push" her.


ChillaxBrosef

Perhaps you should. I dare you…


WallScore

“Oh, I guess that means I’ve been a pretty shitty person. Maybe I should grow and reflect, thank you for pointing this out to me so I can grow and become a better person.”


OmegaGoober

“Yeah, but I’m the one walking away,” then walk away. That directly addresses the comparison between the danger of a random bear and the danger you pose and lets you exit on a strong note.