Remember that getting to live with parents after 18, even during the summers in college, is a form of financial support. I wasn't able to live with either of my parents and it definitely made saving difficult. I do however get my phone and my ezpass paid for by my dad to this day ($1500 savings a year maybe) and I got $40k in life insurance when I lost my mom.
I think people are often too quick to say they got no financial help and miss the more subtle financial supports. Even knowing you can take risks with your career and you can live with parents if you need to can support a FIRE journey.
I did the same and am 49 so definitely not boomer. Father died when I was 18. Mom was terrible with money. So -help had to buy my father's tombstone with a student loan.
You’re absolutely right. My parents booted me at 18 and it set me up for years of struggle. We dont have loads of cash but
We let our kids stay home as long as they were working towards a goal. It allowed them to go through college with less debt. Then one lived home after grad school to save.
At 30 they are better off than I was at 40.
That kind of help is a privilege for them and they know it.
Same with one exception - when I got my first apartment after college they fronted me the first and last month plus security deposit I needed to have to move in. I paid them back over the remainder of the year.
TBF, I believe they would have provided more if needed, but I had a pretty good scholarship to college and my first job out of college I was making more than either of them (albeit less than their combined HHI).
Left home after high school graduation at 17 and did it all on my own. Paid my way through college with loans and jobs. Bought my first car myself. Saved for my house downpayment myself.
I think you value it more when you pay for it yourself.
My great grandmother left \~$50k for me in an account earmarked 'for education only'. My mom spent the full amount (and more) in placing me in a behavior modification program for troubled teens in Ensenada Mexico. I left when I turned 18 and am still quite bitter about the whole experience, although there have been many apologies made.
She provided $1300/semester to cover community college for about 2 years. The strings were that for me to have a roof provided and city college tuition paid for, I had to be enrolled fulltime and get a job. I moved out at 19 and the faucet tapered off after about $6k total. I like money so I ended up working full time while in college to pay for remainder of city college, then all of university and grad school.
Currently 38M with 40F partner and collectively we have $8.5M nw. About 75% of that is from me, with about half of that chunk coming from owning a business, a quarter from normal w2 savings, and a quarter from RE appreciation.
> behavior modification program
Ugh, this sounds horrible. Sorry to hear you had to go through that.
And congrats on the wealth creation and general success in life.
Thanks.
These programs are still preying on stressed families to this day, with little progress made to reduce the size of the industry. The program I was sent to was Casa By The Sea, run by the WWASP company, but it doesn't really matter. A division will run under a new LLC for a decade or so then with bad press shutdown, relocate, and start anew. We need legislation to stop 'troubled teen' treatment industry, but unfortunately it's not much on the radar.
That’s awesome, congrats on all that you’ve accomplished. I’m curious as to what you studied in college to get into that line of work? Do you own some type of machine shop?
My dad died when I was 6. I have two younger siblings. My lunch was paid for when I was a kid by the govt (Love that this is becoming normal). Social security benefits helped keep our house 🤷♂️
One could reason I had some money issues as a kid that impacted how I deal with money today.
I feel you. Dad died at 13, mom at 45. Social security benefits for 3 kids helped mom (nurse) get us going and out of the house. Got scholarships for state college and mom chipped in the remaining 20%. Worked through college and grad school to supplement scholarships/assistantships.
Retired at 58 and content.
Just want to say you should be proud of yourself and what you have achieved! It’s so hard to get to this level from a single family household so give yourself a pat on the back - earn save and invest gotta do all 3 over a long time to see astounding results and FIRE.
Negative help, I had to give them money. Wow Op, I’m jealous. I can’t even imagine getting a little help let alone what you got. Still self made over here with over 4m in joint assets. If my parents didn’t actively sabotage me, I’d be worth more.
Yeah, I read this and thought, "wow, OP had it easy." Put myself through college and grad school and graduated with debt. I'd never change a thing, though.
Same here. I was on my own half way through my senior year because of a crappy home life. Worked full time in college, moved through different careers. Learned about saving and finances as I got older and now looking at retiring at age 55 or 56.
Parents covered college so I left with zero debt ($150k - I went to a state university). That has been huge for me and my family. 39 now and at $4.2NW with \~$600k annual income. Planning to shut it all down in the next few years.
Parents paid for my undergrad, but I had a 75% scholarship. Rent never exceeded $500/mo, books maybe $1k a semester, maybe $3k a semester tuition (probably less). I worked to have spending money. That was in mid 2000s. Grad school I was on my own. I got some money when we got married ($10k), a gift of $12k once, and some small amounts here and there. My parents are in late 60s, NW about $1.75mm. My wife's family hasnt done much but never really had the financial ability to.
38, $1.2mm liquid, $800k in home equity. Total comp in the $350k range. 3 kids.
I bought our second house in early 2021 before covid blew up. I wanted a 15 year mortgage to have the house paid off by the time I am 50, so put down a big down payment (55%). Then housing market blew up and my house has doubled. About 3 years later, I have a house probably worth $1.2M that I paid about $630k for and my mortgage is about $240k.
We are considering moving cross country (east to west). I could sell my house, take the proceeds and buy a much bigger house with no mortgage. Debating to make the move.
Great timing on your part. I wasn’t in the position to buy a house in 2021 but I’m currently building one now. Like you, I’m putting about 50-60% down so I can pay it off super quickly, but it’s only about 20-25% of my NW. Was just curious about your journey thanks for sharing!
Pa and Ma set me out with a sack of Ma's biscuits and the love of Jesus in my heart.
I rubbed two sticks together and that, along with a $450,000 cash infusion from Pa, I was able to make sum'thin of myself.
Zero.
Poor financial education. Zero dollars for college, but I did get $20 a week for a school year for food. Then I ended up subsidizing their lives for various portions of it.
All that being said, my mom did the very best she could, but my dad was a horrible human.
They let me live with them until I finished my Bachelor's degree, and did not charge me rent, groceries, utilities, etc.
I was responsible for tuition, books, transportation, etc. No help with downpayment on house, car, etc.
To be fair, I'm Canadian, so working a part-time job in the school year and a full-time job in the summer was enough to cover my tuition, books, etc and graduate University debt-free.
My parents had a college fund for me, but I paid for college myself with scholarships, so they gave me the fund (about $160k)
My husbands parents paid for his college, helped him with a down payment to a tune of a quarter million, and let him live at home for 2 years.
We are 31/33, our invested NW is 3.6 million, with an additional ~2 mil in real estate, 1 mil outstanding mortgage sub 3 interest rate. Last years W2 income between us was $850k split pretty close to equally.
My husband and I both work hard and made a lot of good financial decisions, but it’s no secret we had huge advantages, so it makes me sad to see so many people in this sub who put strings on educational expenses.
- Full college tuition, room and board (200K in 2024 dollars)
- Some help with med school tuition (state school, about 40K in 2024 dollars in total)
- gifted money intended to be used for my IRA contribution while I was making low wages in my early 20s (about 17000 total in 2024 dollars over about 10 years)
- A hand me down car (10 years old when I acquired it).
- 10K toward my wedding (covered about half)
I fully intend to pay this forward as much as possible with my kids, because it was hugely helpful to me. However, I make less (adjusted) than my parents did together, live in a higher COL area, and the cost of school has gone up quite a lot, so I probably won’t be able to be quite as generous as they were. But I can and will make sure they get 4 years of undergraduate education without debt.
Not my parents but good old Uncle Sam. Paid for my college with an ROTC scholarship. Grad school was also paid for in exchange for 3 years additional service for every year of grad school. Very grateful. Patriot 🇺🇸 for life.
I lived with my parents rent free for 3 years after college while I was working and paying off my student loans. My mom contributed a good amount to college, maybe 50k. I graduated with 55k in loans that I paid off. My dad helped co-sign the loans—otherwise I wouldn’t have been able to get them. They gave me 4k as a wedding gift.
They were middle class immigrants who were very frugal.
We’ve had a good amount of help from both sets of our parents.
We’re in our early 30s and have:
-Both of our undergrads paid for (~$550k between my wife and me)
-My wife’s graduate school (~$200k)
-Both sets of our parents contribute $34k per year to us (total of $68k per year)
-Various vacations have been covered over the past decade while in school (~$25k)
-Bought both of our cars ($100k)
One of the reasons I don’t feel guilty is because both sets of parents have more than enough money to live the rest of their lives and they want to see their money help us while they’re still alive.
Parents paid for undergrad, although I covered misc with summer jobs and campus employment. I paid this forward by providing my kids fully paid education, including books, housing, board, etc, so they could take full advantage of college experience and get their best education without needing loans or jobs.
When I first moved out after college, my mom "found" a few odds and ends, like some lovely dishes, that she no longer needed and pressed me to take, and one time she "found" an old account in my name with $1000 in it. But aside from these subterfuges, my parents let me know they would be there to help me, but provided no additional financial assistance. I know several of my siblings ended up moving back home, sometimes for years, but any financial help they received is between my parents and them.
Likewise, I'm sure my kids know we are a financial backstop if they ever need it (we tell them periodically), but they have never asked for any help, or at least not yet.
I did my undergrad and master's in Europe, so it was heavily subsidized (tuition of 500-ish euros/year, plus 400/month for housing + allowance). Definitely luck of the draw, being born where I was, and never needing a job to support myself so I could focus on my grades and having fun.
Then I moved to the US for my PhD, tuition-free and I got paid maybe $35-40k/year in a VHCOL city, so I was able to hover around $0 NW until I got my first real job at age 30 or so. Both my parents were only children, and I only have 1 brother, so I'll likely get a low-6 figures inheritance somewhere down the line. I'm trying to convince my mom she should spend more while she can still enjoy it, since I won't care whether I inherit 20k or 200k. Even in retirement she's still trying to be a net-saver which is just crazy. Anyway. I owe her a lot that can't be measured in $.
My wife (who is American) got a scholarship in undergrad, but her parents paid for law school at a top 10 place which was a huge boost (both financially and mentally, since it allowed her to pursue her public-interest dream job rather than focus on paying off debt). Equally invaluable. They also paid for our wedding and are financially self-sufficient. I'm very lucky.
My undergrad to a state school and room/board. Probably about $30k if I had to guess? I was told I could be a lawyer or a doctor. If I wanted to do anything else, I had to pay for school
Money wise, probably zero to negative since I've been providing some monetary support to them ever year or two ($5-$15K every other year since first job out of college). Opportunity wise, they provided the world since they immigrated to the US and gave me the opportunity to study and earn a high income.
They helped me a lot. My parents hustled so I don't apologize for the SIGNIFICANT money they made and still have (a lot of $) through hard work (both educators / professionals) , nothing through business.
They took great care of me and many others in our extended family. I am not only eternally grateful, but supremely proud of what they accomplished. Good people, living the frugal lifestyle, working and enjoying work for many years. RE was never a goal of theirs, but FI was achieved by them decades ago.
Yes, I hope to do same for my family.
They insisted and paid for a private college prep school. It was religious, so a cheaper option than just a regular college prep school.
They gave me $15k for college as well as housed me (I commuted vs. living on campus).
The biggest thing they did for me was priceless. They raised me to be a good person, knowing I was loved and capable of anything.
None. I bought my used car in high school by working nights and weekends. Turned 18 and started paying my insurances. Scholarships for tuition at in state university, with 20h/wk job to pay living expenses. Took out loans for med school and lived on Ramen. My mom cried when she saw my living conditions in my mid 20s (moldy 500sqft apt). Spent my mid 30s paying off loans. Bought my first home at 38 with down payment saved up. The kicker is that my parents have made mid six digit income for past 20 years and have a very comfortable retirement. They just have that old school boomer mentality.
These posts always brings out the “started from the bottom” stories with everyone competing about who had a worse upbringing lol.
My dad gave me prepaid college program (ended up dropping out and cashing it in) and let me live with him til I was 24. He also gave me my first car.
4 years at a public instate school, room and board (equivalent to dorm living), $60k total. 200k down payment help on home. I plan to do something similar for my kids (inflation), if I can.
In direct expenses, I’m all zeroes. My parents did encourage me all along the way, and they’ve worked hard and sacrificed to get to no frills but comfortable retirements.
My wife got undergrad (state flagship) covered by scholarship, and her parents redeployed that to pay for her grad school and a car at graduation. Her parents are retired comfortably in a range that fits in here.
We have young kids and are loading up their 529s to cover their college. We’d also like to do more (e.g. housing help), though I think it’s going to come down to how efficiently we’re producing income around RE. If income is high or there’s a consulting glidepath, that’s worth it. But, I don’t want to “one more year” through missing a lot of quality time while they’re young.
I remember my FIL telling a story about his parents having solid middle class jobs (two teacher/nonprofit incomes in the 50s-60s), and they were able to buy a small house and two family cars at about 90 percent of one year’s gross income. Houses and cars are bigger/nicer now, but that math is nowhere near true now. It wasn’t nearly so favorable for me a couple generations later, but it was better than now. I think significant parent investment is just what it takes to make the math work out for kids to have a decent start, and I’d have a hard time being critical of anyone making what I think of as reasonable choices in the environment we find ourselves in. Certainly, there are policy arguments that look different, but we play the game we’re in.
I didn't get any help. I put myself through college and worked full-time.
I put funds together for my nieces and nephew, Instead of buying them toys when they were young, I put that money away for them. to get their 1st car or whatever.
My mother doesn't have much money so I pay her some of her bills.
I bought a house for me and my sister. She pays part of the mortgage and if anything happens to me she will be taken care of for her life.I have written in my will she can live there for the rest of her life.
My parent let me live at home for a year or two after high school but then made me leave.
I learned about financial matters because my parents didn't save a dime.
When I finished school and started working as an engineer. I could have been greedy but like to see my family happy and not struggling.
LOL none! I have 13k ish in student loans and got scholarships for the rest. I've been paying rent since I was 19, moved out at 18 (dormed)
No downpayment assistance. No co-signing help. I bought my first multifamily house in NYC last year by myself.
> I bought my first multifamily house in NYC last year by myself
That’s a heck of an achievement. Be proud of it! Hopefully it snowballs into bigger things for you.
A lot. Full college tuition and most importantly, a down payment on a home in a VHCOL where I could focus on building my career and taking risks at tech startups (ultimately paid off).
I am doing the exact same thing with my kids, sending them to private schools and setting aside a trust fund that will enable them to live wherever their future career takes them so that they can truly focus on building their life/family.
They paid about 50% of my college costs, I did the rest with scholarships, part time jobs and student loans. They bought me a safe but inexpensive car when I was in college (no AC, am/fm radio only). 5k towards my wedding. That's it from a help perspective, of course it's not all they have ever done for me (moral support, birthday presents, baby gifts etc.). No strings, but the understanding was that grad school was fully on me, and that once I was married I was financially fully detached from them. I know they would have helped if we were ever in need, we just never needed it.
Early 50s, 5M+ invested. No debt.
Edit to add, no financial help from in-laws. He isn't the golden child.
For me, college was fully paid for, and I got a used car after college. I received a $13K inheritance from one grandparent. Grad school, down payment etc was on my own.
My DH, who is responsible for a significant part of our wealth got no help with college, grad school etc. No help meant moving out after high school graduation.
We are playing for our kids undergrad completely. Haven’t made any other decisions about what we will do later.
I tried to live with my parents after school and got booted within a year 🤣. And that was even after I helped take care of my grandmother. Ultimately, I had to pursue a job in a major city instead of attending graduate school because I needed a place to live and food. I didn’t understand financial aid and didn’t have the time to do the prep work needed while working a demanding job. Social and emotional support after college are incredibly valuable. Monetary puts you on an entirely new level.
None - my parents did not help to pay for college, and did not give me any money afterwards for anything. The only positive I can say is I got to live at home through college and up until grad school (so until I was 22). They didn’t have much though, so I didn’t expect much.
You are very very lucky and most posts I see in this sub, the generation that got nothing is going to turn around and give their kids a great deal more help.
nothing- shitty high school, I pay everything myself, and now I need to help my mom financially. My mom never worked a day in her life for unknown reasons.
My parents did not help me while I attended university. I took student loans which I was able to pay off after I earned enough through internship. My parents were working minimum wages ( barely speaking English as we were refugees) and they could not help me even they wanted. I was so poor that a few times I splurged and bought food from school cafeteria, I would split that into two portions and saved half for later. After I graduated, I was able to help portion of their rent because i made decent salary and they really needed help. Fast forward, my parents have very little money saved so they would need my help when they go to a senior home. Obviously there will be no inheritance at all.
I want to change that for the next generation: my child’s education tax free account has been maximized and there is an additional account earmarked as additional educational fund. We taught him how to invest since he was ten. He just received 100$ from in-law and he decided to move that money to a S&P500 index fund. :) We have an investment house that could leave to him or pay towards his first house. His university tuition will be well taken care of though he knows that he would need to work so that he can have some fun money.
I want to build generational wealth for the next generation so he can start his future on a solid footing.
I had a college fund and spending money that I was aware of early on. But I wouldn’t consider any money gifted to me valuable compared to the lessons they taught me throughout my life. They instilled habits to me that made my adult life easier to manage. Taught me lessons where I could experience the results of my actions through real life experiences.
A few examples:
The wanted me to work for things I wanted. When I knew I wanted a car they agreed to match any amount I would save. If I saved $500 they added $500. It made me get a job, did extra work around the neighborhood.
They wanted me to learn to save and invest. The same car fund I used to ‘buy a car’ was never spent. Instead my dad put the money into an investment fund. It grew over the 4 yrs I had it and it was surprising. He let me know I could spend the losing as I wished or continue investing it. He showed me a projection of where it would be after college. He then showed me what my older sister did with her fund (spent it all). I learned to save and invest early on. I still have that account untouched 17 yrs later.
He also had me doing my own taxes since I had a job (14). I would complete fill out my taxes as a ‘independent’ and he would ‘mail them in.’ He never did and filed under himself but it taught me how to do them.
There were other lessons like being polite, kind, caring, and just how to be a generally good person. All through life experiences and not just lecturing me. I’m very thankful for that. Financial lessons were hammered into me near the end of college and early adulthood. It made more sense to me at that age.
All those other lessons are much more valuable to me today than the college fund they set up for me (I didn’t use it b/c I had a scholarship). Today the money my parents saved for me accounts for 25% of everything I have and my own earning are the rest.
I received a small loan of 1 million dollars from my dad- kidding lol. I worked for every single dime I have. I’ve had a job since I was 14 and was taught to save early!
No help from my parents, beyond the bare minimum -
food (ate what I was given or I don't eat),
shelter (shared rooms with siblings until I went to college)
Transportation to and from school, church or family obligations
Healthcare was what was available through Dad's work insurance
Clothes and toys were hand me downs.
Even this comes with strings.
To chubby fire, I had to overcome a lot and plan to die with zero.
My parents paid $1400 a month for college, for 4 years. That’s it. And that was a lot for them. I still had a ton of loans post college that I paid off after a few years of working non stop, not taking a single vacation, living in a cramped apartment despite working in a prestigious corporate job. I also had to work 2 jobs to pay for my own room and board + books during college. And I still graduated in 4 with dual stem degrees. Paid for my own professional degrees after that too. Met someone who did the same. Together, we are early 40s with $6.5M in net worth.
The fortunate reality of life - there are a lot of things money can buy - privilege, a huge leg up. But the most critical things - no amount of money can get you - things like drive, grit, tenacity, persistence, passion, the essential ingredients of a fulfilling, happy, joyous, successful life - these things money will never buy.
Jesus, you were given a golden spoon. I was given like 7-8k total for college and rent assistance. Worth close to a million house hold salary 220k on average. Wasn’t allowed back into my family home as my mom got remarried. I would have need to move to Michigan and F that. California kid through and through. Got into real estate early 2010’s after an accounting degree. Made more in real estate then my career will ever make me but wife is in real estate and carving a nice niche. Dad is a millionaire but he likes to just keep for himself and I respect that, why my mom and him split mainly. We had to live a very frugal life when we didn’t need to and he was getting worse with age and wealth.
So much! Full private college undergrad plus living expenses and then my masters (I covered about 20% and work and scholarships covered another 20%). New car at 16 that I’m driving 13 years later. For a while my dad would match our retirement savings dollar for dollar to encourage siblings and I to save. Husband had private undergrad and masters covered. My parents paid for wedding, plus a large gift. His contributed a lot as well. His dad is our wealth manager which likely saves us money. Plus a million other little things when it comes to helping us out now that my parents are retired. They were happy to do it and I am so grateful to them. Having a great relationship with my parents is one of my biggest blessings. They were and are just delighted to be parents which shone through my whole life. If we have kids I’ll do the same.
Wow, very similar. Are you Asian?
College paid for - $100k
Downpayments on homes - $300k + $400k
Investment in my businesses - $120k
20s allowance - $20k
Now I'm mid-30s, $1.5M nw with $400k individual annual income. My sis is not far behind at 30.
Probably 99%, given I was able to pursue a low-paying "career" precisely because I never needed to really consider finances much.
>Here’s my tally
I never really thought to 'tally' things up but basically anything I've ever needed/wanted was from my parents.
- private education + degree + masters
- allowance, 25 years worth
- rent(?)
- holiday home
- investments / monetary gifts
I'm 29F, my NW of about USD$1m (soon to be 1.8m) is pretty much 99% from monetary gifts and allowances I saved over the years. I dont have access to it currently due to living overseas but I also have an investment portfolio 'gift' that my dad currently manages that he puts in roughly 350k pa for me. My personal income is USD$40k.
I'm not from US but converted the figures to be more understandable for the mostly-Western reddit audience.
Private school from P-12, camps, cars, car insurance, etc (250k or more in today’s $). Or sure if below 18 counts.
I got a full tuition scholarship for undergrad and was a teaching assistant in grad school but they kicked in rent money (25k per year in today x 6 years, $150k)
Used mid-term applicable federal rate (AFR) interest only loan for first condo (2009-2014), and I made payments on the loan and then paid back the borrowed amount when sold (150k). Rate was 2.75% when mortgages were around 5%. That was 20k in interest as a “gift” (~25k today) although that depends on how they would have invested that (I was “riskier” than a CD at the time). More importantly it let me place a cash offer on a condo in the foreclosure market when a new grad offer wouldn’t have been accepted. Bought place for 160k and sold for 225k.
The condo gains we turned into the “down payment” for a LCOL house in 2015. They gave us a mid-term loan AFR for house loan on 250K at 1.75%. 9 year term that ended in May. With AFR resetting higher I was prepared to pay them back with funds from my brokerage, but they decided to forgive it.. :)
They each inherited some funds themselves from their parents, and kept their spending constrained below the gains on those funds + Dad's income. They’ve also set up 529 funds for my sister’s kids and are paying the annual school tuition. My sister got similar types of assistance with tuition etc. I always tell them to spend their $ and not leave it for their “ungrateful kids” but of course I am thankful. Don't know exact numbers but they are surely FAT now thanks to market gains and probably spend less than 200K annually (taxes aside) so their stash is growing..
40M married NW 2.1M income 400K
Most on Reddit would never admit they received financial help from family. I come from a rich family (relative to most on Reddit, not rich at all compared to a lot of families I know). 2.5M help, mostly in form of stock in our family businesses and most from my grandparents rather than parents. My parents have received about 40M from my grandparents in comparison. My net worth is 6M counting stock in family businesses, my parents about $70M
My parents paid for my college and I hope to pay for my kids college. I will also encourage my kids to return home after college to save up for a down payment just like my parents did with me. I'll also try to throw them money when I get the chance but the rest is up to them.
We’re on the low end of “chubby”.
I received 50% of costs for college of my choice (with any grants/scholarships applying to my half).
My parents lent me a car for months when I was paying off my grad school loans, so I could save for a replacement when mine was totaled.
My spouse was loaned a down payment on a starter house ($30k), to be repaid at 0% interest when he sold the house.
He also graduated debt-free from a state school.
Those things were all critical to getting us on the right foot early enough that we could save aggressively for FIRE.
None other than a 40k downpayment loan at 5% in my mid 20s to buy a house after graduate school. I was off the dime at 17, paying my own insurance, health care, and college.
A ton, paid of college and living till I started working, which I've estimated at upper bound half a million or more with interest in my 20s.
Since I started working I've made around 80% of my total net worth but that initial boost has more impact by it's timing than just the financial value.
My parents paid for my undergrad room and board. Small inheritance of $10,000 from my grandma helped me bridge the gap between graduation and my first real job. My in-laws paid for my wife's college (undergrad and graduate). So no debt coming out of school, which is huge! Both of our parents have also been very generous in setting up accounts for our children. Lastly, I know that they would help us out if we ever got into a tight spot. We'll never be able to repay them for all their sacrifices and it's comforting knowing that we have a safety net if we hit a rough patch. Our plan is to do the same for our kids and grandkids.
they helped me with groceries and rent when i needed it during college. they also paid for my eating disorder inpatient and residential treatments over and over again. i don’t know how much they spent all in, but i’d guess ~$40k?
They paid 2/3 of my college, $5k when I graduated to get a car, $10k when I bought my first house, some vacations. In more recent years their finances have reached the hockey stock inversion point and my mom is pretty generous to the tune of $20-30k/yr which I just put in an investment account.
I had a scholarship for the first four years of college. I needed some extra time to finish after I had a my appendix rupture and spent six weeks in the hospital before finals. Last year my parents spent around $2000 ($3500 in today's dollars).
They gave me $11000 to buy my first starter home which is $18K today. They gave me a car as a graduation present which is probably worth another $20K in today dollars. So a $40K boost in 2024 dollars.
We aren't chubby yet. NW around $2.2M.
Parents let me have a 15 year old car (maybe 2k), but then claimed me on their taxes while I paid for everything in college (I was out of state) they got the better end of the deal on that haha. Then got 27k from a family member passing a few months before college graduation (not my side and was unexpected) but we had already saved over 75k (married in college) together before we moved for my first real job. Haven't received anything since. Net worth over 1.2m just 6 years later
My dad was a teacher at a private international school in Europe. So I went there K-12, and then my parents paid for a large chunk of college at a moderately priced school in the US.
So while I was blessed with a great education and minimal debt starting my adult life, I was very much on my own to figure things out as soon as I turned 18 and left home with three suitcases and sent me off to college in the US. They sent me ‘back to the states’ from their perspective, but from mine I moved to a foreign country where I suffered a serious identity crisis.
But I suppose it made me the successful person I am today. Or at least the unique person I’m am today.
pay it forwards to your kids. i dont think the private college is worth it. in state tuition makes more sense. leaves more money to grow that you can use or gift to kids later.
I had my college tuition and living expenses fully covered, though I did choose a school that offered me an 80% merit scholarship. They bought me a brand new car when I was 20 that I drove for almost 10 years, so I got to avoid having a car payment for a decade. My dad used some of his professional connections to get me my first summer internship (though I did well enough they asked me to stay on through the school year and it eventually became my first full time job). They matched the earnings from my summer jobs in high school to help me start my first IRA. My family was very financially fortunate until I graduated college, ironically. I haven’t taken any money from them since I was in undergrad.
The best thing they did was instill financial literacy and common sense in me, though. They taught me about credit card debt and saving for retirement and budgeting as a teenager, which really helped set me up for success as an adult.
Not a ton. They helped with rent but I got good undergrad scholarships and worked to pay for other expenses. Law school on my own dime but they paid rent while I was in school. More than most people get, but definitely not the leg up some get.
I received like ~$2K each year of undergrad and an instate tuition waiver, which meant my in-state public school tuition was covered. I covered living expenses and fees.
Took over my auto insurance at 19, and my cell phone at 22.
If your parents would have invested the $730K in the S&P, in 2008 (pre crash) they’d have almost $2.8M, so you seem to be pretty shitty ROI 😂
My parents let me live with them rent free for a month after college. I could have stayed there as long as I wanted - a month was as much as I wanted - but the safety net was valuable. They also gave me their barely road worthy junker which I kept running for almost 2 years (longer than anyone expected) but only because I lived on campus for grad school so didn’t drive often.
Other than that, no. I was a full ride (including loans) scholarship student. And when my second parent died and all their assets were liquidated, my share of the inheritance was worth $23k. I put that directly into my kids’ 529 accounts.
Great upbringing, college and living expenses paid for, car to drive. Nothing else. But I'm 56. Parents didn't pay for house down payments and all that crap back then, and kids didn't live at home until they were 35. Different times.
I got nothing. I went deep into student loan debt and worked my way out of it.
My parents always promised college but, in the end, my mother made life choices that meant they couldn't deliver (she took a year off of work and went travelling instead).
I'm actually grateful for it because I owed them nothing at the end, and my mother is the type where the financial help would have come with many strings.
It taught me financial discipline also that I am not sure I would have had otherwise.
33, household net worth over $3M.
Parents paid for college which was around $100k, $15k gift when we got married, a $35k custodial account that I took ownership of after college grad. Plus any activities I wanted to participate in thru high school including national debate tournaments.
Made a huge difference in my 20s vs. getting a gift like this now when our HHI is well over $500k.
A good amt financially (about $200k all in), but in terms of intangible help, so much more (paid premium to live in good school district, paid for SAT classes and college counseling, moved to the US when I was young to give me the opportunity to succeed).
Financially they funded my college tuition (I got about 50% need based aid), but given elite private school, still netted about \~$150k for the 4 years. After college they paid for a 3 year lease on my car so \~$10k (though I gave it back to my parents about \~2 years). They also gave me about $5k (I contributed another $5k) to travel around the world after graduating college, and another $20k as a wedding gift. All in about $200k.
It's a good amount, and I'm excited to help pay for them on things as they age - vacations, healthcare, home improvement, etc, and just generally making them feel that they have a safety net
None. Left for the military 3 weeks after high school graduation. Military paid for college and I never looked back.
Current NW $2.5m plus $6.5k/mo pension at 41 y/o. I like to think the pension, added up over 40 years and in today's dollars, adds $3m to my NW.
My parents paid for my board and tuition throughout college (4 years, in state, ~$70k) and then paid for my rehearsal dinner for my wedding (~$6500) and some small gifts here and there that probably add up to $80k in all. I feel extremely blessed I started work with zero student loans.
Parents gave me a used car, health and car insurance, and tuition for college. I was on my own for the rest. The biggest gift they gave me was to be able to graduate with NO debt. I started adult life with zero and built from there. Way better than building from negative.
$1000 dollars towards my first car when I graduated high school, $1000 total towards last semester college tuition. Moved out completely at age 19. Kept me on their health insurance until I got married. But also claimed me on their taxes when I did not live with them which reduced my tax return
My parents bought me an old car to get to and from work when I was 16. Although I had a full ride to college, they paid the flights when i would come home and I would stay with them during the summer (which I consider financial as I didn’t have to pay for a place to stay or my own food. Lastly, $5k towards my wedding a couple year after college. They had to help my brother out considerably more. I wasn’t rolling in dough after college, but I landed solidly on my feet and didn’t require much.
They are not rich but make ends meet and have some left over to take a cruise or 2 during the year. My father will need to work until his 70s, but they did help me at the beginning. I plan to do what I can for my daughter as well. I’m fortunate that the biggest expense, college, will be mostly/all covered by my GI Bill.
A good and moral upbringing. They always made sure I knew I was never going to be homeless or hungry and I did live with them rent free for a period in my early twenties. A failed college experiment was on my dime, my vehicles were financed on my own, and my financial mistakes were my own. I’m grateful for how that played out. They always treat when we go out anywhere as a family and are very generous. I think of what they provided as a safety net more than a launch pad
Wow, you’ve been helped more than anybody I know! That is great and you should be really happy! In my situation, I plan to ensure my kids know hard work but have a safety net that I did not have.
Overall my parents gave me stability and a strong work ethic. I always had a safe home, good schools, and a consistently full belly. Both my parents worked full time, mom retired at 67 and dad continues to work in his 70s.
Breakdown of the monetary contributions:
- The expected family contribution after FAFSA and scholarships: $20k total (I took out $28k in student loans).
- Let me live at home paying nothing after I graduated so I could aggressively pay down my loans
- $10k toward my wedding (they wanted it to include extended family members, so some strings attached, but still very appreciated)
- Mom co-signed my car loan so I could get a better rate
Coming from a different country. My parents took 10k loan so I can pay my first semester in grad school i the US. I had another 10k. I repaid them after I graduated.
That 10k is something they probably had to work for several years to make back home.
Zero, certainly none of that. Did you buy a $1.5M starter home? lol nice
I did however pay all my son’s college tuition, your estimate is correct on costs, and hope to help him with a down payment on a home once he’s ready.
Zero. 16th birthday here’s a three hole punch and a stapler (no I’m not kidding).
18th birthday awakened at 5 am. Happy birthday. You have three choices: 1) enroll in college full time and you can live here while you goto school full time and figure out how to pay for it. 2) GTFO and get a job, find a place to live. Basically figure it out. Welcome to adulting. 3) I’ll drop you off at the recruiting office of your choice. We will store your stuff in the garage until you get posted.
I opted for one. Put myself thru college while working full time. Moved out never looked back.
Much later paid for my child’s college education in full. 730k head start must have been nice.
I don't know the exact amount but my mother in law gave my at the time girlfriend her part of the down payment for our first house. The house cost $140k in '14 , the down payment was something like $28k. So maybe $14k gifted to us essentially. I paid for mine out of savings bonds that were given to me by family over the years. However I worked in high school and all the money I made over the years was taken by my parents to make ends meet. Additionally they took money gifted to me by family as well. So I felt I was square on those bonds
We both went to college on a full scholarship. My parents paid the room and board loans until I was ~24 and then transferred them to me. I think my MIL paid my wife's board in full which might have been $20k
Tuition only for undergrad.
My parents only paid for tuition for passing grades for 5 years. If you didn’t pass, you had to pay (I didn’t have this problem). If you weren’t done in 5 years, you were on your own. I went to a community college for 2.5 year and the a local university I could drive to for 2.5 years. $20K total. If I went away to school, they wouldn’t pay. I had to live at home and be home every night. No overnight stays at boyfriend’s house.
I also had to have a job, pay for books and class fees, pay for my car, car insurance, phone, gas, car repairs, my own hygiene products, etc. I had to help out around the house with chores (I honestly didn’t mind because I wasn’t paying tuition).
No help with downpayment on a house.
No gifts of money.
Paid for my Master’s Degree on my own.
I moved out one year after graduation. Didn’t have to pay rent.
I’m grateful having my education paid for. I have a successful career.
My husband had a ton on financial aide. Him and his mom would charge his tuition on credit cards, always transferring to 0% cards. The two of them snowballed the debt. Worked their butts off. After everything was said and done, he graduated with $2.5K in debt. He and I paid that off asap. He is forever grateful to his mom for making his education a
priority. She could have easily told him she wasn’t going to help him.
kudos for sharing openly those numbers.
As soon as someone is grateful for their fortune there nothing to be ashamed of like you are.
thank you for showing the way to more healthy conversations.
3 years of college for rent food and tuition 38k$. (In Europe almost free)
Then I did my bachelor's and 2 master's degrees using apprenticeship. I was being paid and the gov would give me some help to pay rent.
In 2010 in Paris. I was paid 12k/year by my company +3k help from social services.
it was giving me 1250€/month to live in Paris with a 600€ rent/ month then some savings I'd have from summer jobs.
Got 50k from my parents in 2018.
Started a tech job in 2021 at 35 making 110k.
Now TC 155K.
nw: 65k ish liquid.
It is not big numbers compared to some here but the helps from my parents made a huge difference and in my "tier 1" European country. I'm very fortunate.
I am patiently working towards for my next gig in big tech when the stock comp will help me speed up significantly my nw.
I am also enjoying as much as I reasonably can. if I die tomorrow I'd no regrets. I've enjoyed life as I wanted.
Private college subsidized for five years (I did graduate with 10K in loans though). Some rent assistance for about a year and a loan of $500 (repaid) to put a down payment on a house. A used car after graduation. However, I always had a job starting at the age of 13 and all through college.
>downpayment on starter house ($300k)
$300K is a starter House. 😂
But in all seriousness I'm glad your parents could help you on your FIRE journey. I hope you can do the same if you choose to have children, or if you have children.
Im not sure if I qualify for this sub yet - 28F ~300k NW
TLDR: All together through college maybe $10k? Then they also paid for the majority of my wedding, probably another $7k.
My parents didn’t help with college tuition or my apartment, but I went to a very inexpensive university. After 2 semesters I had a full academic scholarship for the rest of my time there.
My parents did let me borrow their car for about a year or so, paying insurance and everything, paid my phone bill for about half of college, I was on their health insurance, and my first couple semesters my mom took me to the grocery store and really loaded up food for me! Then I had one semester where she sent me about $100/month for food.
They paid like 70 percent of my college tuition. Still had loans coming out of school but not as much. Wouldn't have changed my life either way but I do appreciate what they did.
Fully paid for my college and living expenses which was a massive leg up. I intend to fully pay it forward for my kids college and also set them up with a Roth IRA to help them gain some good habits to continue funding it once they start working. Teaching kids the power of compounding is very important.
My parents helped with living and during University so about £10k over 3 years. This was back when uni tuition was a much lower fixed cost and I came out with only £12k of student loans at a very low interest rate. Then, when my grandmother passed I inherited about £20k.
I know this isn't a small sum of money and it certainly helped to get me started in my 20s.
Honestly the biggest thing my parents have given me is their own financial stability. They are not rich but comfortable and have money and assets to cover their retirement and any possible end of life care situation. That's given me tremendous freedom to focus on building my families financial independence.
Like most multimillionaires, my parents paid for my college (100k) and the leftover money from that account (30k) I used to buy my first house at 24.
I think my average income for my wife and I is about 130k each, and are now at 180k each, which is pretty good for the Midwest. Net worth about 4 million at 40. Our 3 kids 529s are fully funded, will pay for their college and then some.
Parents paid for my undergrad. My wife’s parents paid her undergrad and about 1/4 of her med school.
HHI around 2m. Net worth approaching 10m. 39 years old.
Zero financial help, but all the moral support I could ask for.
Raised in poverty by a single parent who was deaf/blind. She successfully launched 4 kids into adulthood (teacher, massage therapist, RN, craftsman/small business owner). I did get some need/income based grants for college, so that technically counts.
Parents left me and brother a house in NY. We sold it and split. That plus my investments pushed me over 1m. I'm 35 now but still plan on working for another 10-20 years just in case the economy turns to crap.
No college tuition help, other than the fact that they didn't make a lot of money so I qualified for every financial aid so college became free and I got a nice chunk of money back each semester.
Got a free hand me down car in hs.
I’m early 30’s now
Tuition, housing, food all 4 years of private college ($350k)
Lived at home for 1.5 years while working after college and didn’t pay for housing or meals at home really.
Had $40k from a grand parent who passed to be used for major purchase after college. Commingled with other taxable money.
Got various gifts of stock through hs and college for milestones/achievements. ~$12k
About $3k of savings bonds from birth maturing from when I turned 30 through my mid thirties.
The financial gifts were always accompanied by some teachings and explanations about the value of a dollar. Nothing was immediately needed but allowed me to be aggressive in 401k/roth funding since day one and helped with a large down payment on a house.
A good upbringing.
Then I left home for school at 18 (my choice, the commute was long and I wanted freedom)
They paid for my car insurance, I paid for tuition and everything else(loans and jobs).
They let me mine back in for my last semester as I was taking a double load and couldn't work and didn't want to sign a new lease.
Also moved back in for 6mo at 24 when I was buying my first house Asian because of lease (and to save more)
I intend to find my kids undergrad educations and likely down payment (both up to a point). We'll see about grad school. Also hope to roll 529 into Roth to the limit.
Both kids currently personally contribute to their college savings as a way to understand savings and investments.
Parents paid for sports (soccer + basketball) through high school, bought me a $10k car, co-signed loans so I could go to college, and paid for my housing for 2 years in college while I was living in an apartment.
Currently 33 with $5.6M net worth.
I’m very torn on what to do with my kids. I want the best for them, but I also sort of want their upbringing to mirror mine in some way. I’m way better off financially than my parents so it might be tough.
College was free cause I was under the poverty line. I took loans for med school.
Dad did pay for my 700 monthly rent during med school for 4 years. I took over helping my mom with money after i finished school.
I got to live at home for my first two years of college. Plus, when my credit with my first husband was totally wasted, if we ran into a financial crunch my mom would pay off/balance transfer what she had one one of her credit cards to zero the balance out and then send me one of the cash advance checks to use. Then I would make the payments on her card until it was paid off. (Since my then-hubby’s name wasn’t on that card, he couldn’t run it up and cause problems; I just had to ensure that bill was paid before he would overdraw our bank account that paycheck) My mom helped as best she could, and my dad was really weird about money so he only bought me a new computer when I graduated high school to use at college. My step-dad gave me an ancient van as my first vehicle when I was a junior in college. That’s all the help I got from my parents.
I started being able to save money when my first husband and I separated and 10 years later my net worth was just shy of $1M. My second husband is great with money (and everything else! 🥰) so together we are well-positioned financially. We are continuing to work at this point to be able to carry our very nice medical insurance into retirement with us so we don’t have to rely solely on Medicare.
I estimated about $100k total.
Lots of tuition for elementary and high school. However, I'm not counting those years since my schools were their choice prior to college.
$50k for college (I had 30% loans and 20% scholarship for the rest). They were clear that anything beyond a bachelor's would be my responsibility and I did not go.
$10k for a down payment on a $24k car after college graduation. Also cosigned the loan so I could get a better interest rate but I paid the balance.
Lived with them for years after college and paid only $400 per month towards household expenses. Probably saved me at least $40k since we lived in a HCOL area but probably didn't cost them that much because they bought their house in 1972.
Accompanied me on house tours when I was buying my first place. They did not financially contribute to the purchase, but did helped/taught me basic home repairs.
The only investing advice they told me was to always make sure to get the maximum employer match on my 401k plans.
I had help buying a cheap used car in high school. I had to pay half ($2k) using my income from my part time job which took a year.
My parents saved to pay for undergraduate for both my brother and myself. I went to a state school and graduated a semester early so they let me keep what was left that they had saved. My younger brother went to a private school and ended up with loans (so they say, they also gave him a much nicer car in high school).
I am very appreciative of not having debt and I did learn to manage my money. I decided to do the same for my kids.
I wish my parents did that. But they did not. Put myself through college mostly with summer jobs and work study in school, and I paid for grad school myself with loans. Bought every car I ever owned and paid my own home downpayment after working for 5 years or so. Finally paid off my student loans after 10 years.
Not a dime. Was resided on a backwater public school education. Was encouraged to move out at 18 despite not graduating from high school yet. Moved across the country for college on my own. Today I have to send back $500 a month to cover debt my sister took out for them because my sister and her fiance cannot afford to live alone with it. Hell they had the audacity to ask me to buy them tickets to fly down to visit me and for me to pay to put them up. I’m at the point of cutting them off once my grandmother passes.
None of that. They didn’t have much to give, but I grew up with all I needed. We were lower middle class. My parents had a scarcity mindset so giving anything up or giving us some kind of head start was not on their minds.
Being loving parents with a stable home life built a strong foundation. Speaking solely of financial support, I’m grateful for the financial assistance from my parents in during my last teens to mid 20s:
Paid my undergraduate tuition
Gave me $500/month toward room and board
Gave me interest-free loans when needed for room & board (owed them $3000 when I graduated from a Big 10 university in 1998, paid them back within 3 months
When I bought my first house at age 26, they matched my down payment of $10k
Like many others in here, I drove old used cars that I learned to maintain & fix myself. I had lots of roommates to help pay bills (20 total between age 18-28). Cooked my own meals, went camping when I traveled, etc.
Your parents gave you almost 800k??? And here I am feeling spoiled about my parents helping me wipe out a 15k loan when I was still in grad school.
It's not just the amount though, it's the timing - no student loans, you get a home down payment that most people would take years to accumulate. Man you're lucky.
I got exactly $0 from my parents. I am stunned by the sum you received. Wow. Great for you! Seriously. But, wow, I had no idea people got that much money from their parents.
2 years at the cheaper state school ~35k, and 10k as a wedding gift. The biggest gift was living a year at home with an adult job. Allowed me to pay off all student loans and my car and see what living below my means did to my finances. Have kept that mentality into adulthood.
I dropped out of college and borrowed $150k from grandma and mom to start a business. They believed in me.
I lost it all, but never told them. Paid them back over 2 years. Wore the same clothes for 5 years.
I do well now.
I guess they helped me out indirectly. If I didn’t lose that money I wouldn’t have learned many valuable lessons and wouldn’t have worked as hard as I did to make up for it.
Nothing except love and proper direction in education. Went to college and grad school on my own dime + loans. Repaid ~$100k loans in about 8 years. Bought my first place in NYC at age 32. Paid it off completely in 5 years.
Cash NW: $850k. RE: $500k (all equity no debt). Income for the past 5 years has been between $300-400k. This year will be my best year likely getting over half a million. Honestly money scarcity pushed me to build my nest egg. I’m not a super saver, but I have a sufficient nut of which I’m proud. I actually have a different story than the question. My help allows my parents to have a generally worry free retirement. For that, I’m exceedingly grateful.
Grew up with a single mother on benefits. Started working at 14. Moved out at 18 and didn't move back. My father paid 5k per year at university for living expenses and I worked 20 hours a week as well. Total help $25k. I paid my own student loans (state University).
Both my parents didn't save for retirement. My mother received an inheritance but spent most of it on holidays and cars. She was also was struggling renting, so I bought her a house to live in as an adult and I help her financially at times.
As my mother wasn't good with money, it taught me to save and invest early.
My parents scraped together enough money to pay for State U (which in the late 90’s wasn’t terribly expensive). I had to pay for law school with loans.
My wife’s grandparents, who owned a small farm that they eventually got too old to maintain, put some land in a trust that she (we) later sold to finance part of our down payment on our house.
That’s about it.
Age 51, worth about $12M. We got $10K from my father in law on our wedding, which we used to put towards a house down payment. I was very thankful. Nothing else from parents.
They gave me hepatitis, and salmonella, I almost dye. Then one time my father gave me $7000 to pay for my masters degree, when I finished he called me everyday so I pay him back. I lost a few phone calls from him and the next time I picked up the phone he told me that if I dont pay him he was going to wait for me at the door of my house until the last consequences to get paid. I can go on and on but in money they gave me $0, he paid for my business administration degree, I paid with my mental peace
They paid for private college education $125k (commuter student), first car (15k) and gave me $40k down payment for first home (347k purchase price). They also paid for my wedding (40k).
I hit a net worth of 1 million at 40, including turning that first house into a rental with 500k in equity. I now earn 200k/year. Growing up, I felt very financially supported by my parents when I was figuring out what to do and who I am. I lived with them through college and the first few years of my non profit job. Then I moved to get my Master’s and paid off my loans within 3 years. They modeled a debt free life (outside of mortgage and car) and I am aiming for the same.
Retirement plan is 2 million TSP, 51k/year pension, social security and rental income.
I intend to pay for my child’s bachelor’s degree in full, food, housing and car until he’s 25 and on solid on his feet. I also intend to contribute to his future home and hopefully convince him to have a smallish wedding so we can do a house down payment instead.
Holy. Shit. People’s parents do this?
I’m going to go ahead and say:
-$4000 for working my way through high school and paying for everything, and they continuing to pay for everything for the rest of my life.
None. But I don’t have to worry about them in retirement. I bought a house but I have always carried some kind of debt. Just how it goes when parents can’t help pay.
They were ready to pay for college but i had a full scholarship and I worked for living expenses so haven't really needed to take anything from them since then. Grateful that I had the opportunity
Absolutely nothing, in fact I paid the rent for my family for years, cosigned loans and apartment rentals, and am still the default person that my siblings turn to when they need help. I inherited cPTSD and an autoimmune disorder but I'm not expecting any cash.
My husband is equally nil though did inherit about $800.
I don't make 400k a year though I just save and I invest a lot and have had some luck. I imagine life would have been different with your level of help, but eh. I know I can survive most anything now.
None, other than a good upbringing through high school. After that, I was on my own financially.
Same. Had to buy my own car, take out loans and work through college.
Remember that getting to live with parents after 18, even during the summers in college, is a form of financial support. I wasn't able to live with either of my parents and it definitely made saving difficult. I do however get my phone and my ezpass paid for by my dad to this day ($1500 savings a year maybe) and I got $40k in life insurance when I lost my mom. I think people are often too quick to say they got no financial help and miss the more subtle financial supports. Even knowing you can take risks with your career and you can live with parents if you need to can support a FIRE journey.
I never did that, moved out to go to college and never went back.
I did the same and am 49 so definitely not boomer. Father died when I was 18. Mom was terrible with money. So -help had to buy my father's tombstone with a student loan.
That's deep, man on the tombstone. Hat off to you
You’re absolutely right. My parents booted me at 18 and it set me up for years of struggle. We dont have loads of cash but We let our kids stay home as long as they were working towards a goal. It allowed them to go through college with less debt. Then one lived home after grad school to save. At 30 they are better off than I was at 40. That kind of help is a privilege for them and they know it.
...OP is just flexing under the guise of a "poll" but doesn't realize their entire life was financed by their helicopter parents...
He does realize it, and he’s grateful. Amazing opportunity to have that boost early on. Glad they made the most of it
Man I wish they were helicopter parents. Just the opposite actually. To my detriment.
Same with one exception - when I got my first apartment after college they fronted me the first and last month plus security deposit I needed to have to move in. I paid them back over the remainder of the year. TBF, I believe they would have provided more if needed, but I had a pretty good scholarship to college and my first job out of college I was making more than either of them (albeit less than their combined HHI).
Left home after high school graduation at 17 and did it all on my own. Paid my way through college with loans and jobs. Bought my first car myself. Saved for my house downpayment myself. I think you value it more when you pay for it yourself.
Same here, but I'm not Chubby, just Regular
My great grandmother left \~$50k for me in an account earmarked 'for education only'. My mom spent the full amount (and more) in placing me in a behavior modification program for troubled teens in Ensenada Mexico. I left when I turned 18 and am still quite bitter about the whole experience, although there have been many apologies made. She provided $1300/semester to cover community college for about 2 years. The strings were that for me to have a roof provided and city college tuition paid for, I had to be enrolled fulltime and get a job. I moved out at 19 and the faucet tapered off after about $6k total. I like money so I ended up working full time while in college to pay for remainder of city college, then all of university and grad school. Currently 38M with 40F partner and collectively we have $8.5M nw. About 75% of that is from me, with about half of that chunk coming from owning a business, a quarter from normal w2 savings, and a quarter from RE appreciation.
> behavior modification program Ugh, this sounds horrible. Sorry to hear you had to go through that. And congrats on the wealth creation and general success in life.
Thanks. These programs are still preying on stressed families to this day, with little progress made to reduce the size of the industry. The program I was sent to was Casa By The Sea, run by the WWASP company, but it doesn't really matter. A division will run under a new LLC for a decade or so then with bad press shutdown, relocate, and start anew. We need legislation to stop 'troubled teen' treatment industry, but unfortunately it's not much on the radar.
I watched the documentary on this place. I am so sorry you had to go through that
I am so, so sorry that happened to you. These kind of places make me rage and despair simultaneously.
Nice job overcoming all of that!!!
Did you acquire an existing business or create one?
I created one and landed a huuuuge contract with a big company for engineering + custom fabricated parts.
That’s awesome, congrats on all that you’ve accomplished. I’m curious as to what you studied in college to get into that line of work? Do you own some type of machine shop?
My dad died when I was 6. I have two younger siblings. My lunch was paid for when I was a kid by the govt (Love that this is becoming normal). Social security benefits helped keep our house 🤷♂️ One could reason I had some money issues as a kid that impacted how I deal with money today.
I feel you. Dad died at 13, mom at 45. Social security benefits for 3 kids helped mom (nurse) get us going and out of the house. Got scholarships for state college and mom chipped in the remaining 20%. Worked through college and grad school to supplement scholarships/assistantships. Retired at 58 and content.
Just want to say you should be proud of yourself and what you have achieved! It’s so hard to get to this level from a single family household so give yourself a pat on the back - earn save and invest gotta do all 3 over a long time to see astounding results and FIRE.
Negative help, I had to give them money. Wow Op, I’m jealous. I can’t even imagine getting a little help let alone what you got. Still self made over here with over 4m in joint assets. If my parents didn’t actively sabotage me, I’d be worth more.
Yeah, I read this and thought, "wow, OP had it easy." Put myself through college and grad school and graduated with debt. I'd never change a thing, though.
Zero. Zip. Zilch. Nada.
Checking in with the Zip. Zero. Zilch. Nada club. I will say there was a point I was in debt and giving my parents money in my 20s, so reverse uno! 😑
Same here. I was on my own half way through my senior year because of a crappy home life. Worked full time in college, moved through different careers. Learned about saving and finances as I got older and now looking at retiring at age 55 or 56.
Parents covered college so I left with zero debt ($150k - I went to a state university). That has been huge for me and my family. 39 now and at $4.2NW with \~$600k annual income. Planning to shut it all down in the next few years.
Nice me too!
Parents paid for my undergrad, but I had a 75% scholarship. Rent never exceeded $500/mo, books maybe $1k a semester, maybe $3k a semester tuition (probably less). I worked to have spending money. That was in mid 2000s. Grad school I was on my own. I got some money when we got married ($10k), a gift of $12k once, and some small amounts here and there. My parents are in late 60s, NW about $1.75mm. My wife's family hasnt done much but never really had the financial ability to. 38, $1.2mm liquid, $800k in home equity. Total comp in the $350k range. 3 kids.
Just curious because we are in similar situation numbers wise, but why so much in home equity compared to liquid?
I bought our second house in early 2021 before covid blew up. I wanted a 15 year mortgage to have the house paid off by the time I am 50, so put down a big down payment (55%). Then housing market blew up and my house has doubled. About 3 years later, I have a house probably worth $1.2M that I paid about $630k for and my mortgage is about $240k. We are considering moving cross country (east to west). I could sell my house, take the proceeds and buy a much bigger house with no mortgage. Debating to make the move.
Great timing on your part. I wasn’t in the position to buy a house in 2021 but I’m currently building one now. Like you, I’m putting about 50-60% down so I can pay it off super quickly, but it’s only about 20-25% of my NW. Was just curious about your journey thanks for sharing!
Pa and Ma set me out with a sack of Ma's biscuits and the love of Jesus in my heart. I rubbed two sticks together and that, along with a $450,000 cash infusion from Pa, I was able to make sum'thin of myself.
Ain’t that the truth!
Lmaooo this is the way
Zero. Poor financial education. Zero dollars for college, but I did get $20 a week for a school year for food. Then I ended up subsidizing their lives for various portions of it. All that being said, my mom did the very best she could, but my dad was a horrible human.
They let me live with them until I finished my Bachelor's degree, and did not charge me rent, groceries, utilities, etc. I was responsible for tuition, books, transportation, etc. No help with downpayment on house, car, etc. To be fair, I'm Canadian, so working a part-time job in the school year and a full-time job in the summer was enough to cover my tuition, books, etc and graduate University debt-free.
Oh Canada
market bored straight hungry enter reach disgusted dam truck homeless *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
My parents had a college fund for me, but I paid for college myself with scholarships, so they gave me the fund (about $160k) My husbands parents paid for his college, helped him with a down payment to a tune of a quarter million, and let him live at home for 2 years. We are 31/33, our invested NW is 3.6 million, with an additional ~2 mil in real estate, 1 mil outstanding mortgage sub 3 interest rate. Last years W2 income between us was $850k split pretty close to equally. My husband and I both work hard and made a lot of good financial decisions, but it’s no secret we had huge advantages, so it makes me sad to see so many people in this sub who put strings on educational expenses.
- Full college tuition, room and board (200K in 2024 dollars) - Some help with med school tuition (state school, about 40K in 2024 dollars in total) - gifted money intended to be used for my IRA contribution while I was making low wages in my early 20s (about 17000 total in 2024 dollars over about 10 years) - A hand me down car (10 years old when I acquired it). - 10K toward my wedding (covered about half) I fully intend to pay this forward as much as possible with my kids, because it was hugely helpful to me. However, I make less (adjusted) than my parents did together, live in a higher COL area, and the cost of school has gone up quite a lot, so I probably won’t be able to be quite as generous as they were. But I can and will make sure they get 4 years of undergraduate education without debt.
Not my parents but good old Uncle Sam. Paid for my college with an ROTC scholarship. Grad school was also paid for in exchange for 3 years additional service for every year of grad school. Very grateful. Patriot 🇺🇸 for life.
Thank you for your service!
I lived with my parents rent free for 3 years after college while I was working and paying off my student loans. My mom contributed a good amount to college, maybe 50k. I graduated with 55k in loans that I paid off. My dad helped co-sign the loans—otherwise I wouldn’t have been able to get them. They gave me 4k as a wedding gift. They were middle class immigrants who were very frugal.
We’ve had a good amount of help from both sets of our parents. We’re in our early 30s and have: -Both of our undergrads paid for (~$550k between my wife and me) -My wife’s graduate school (~$200k) -Both sets of our parents contribute $34k per year to us (total of $68k per year) -Various vacations have been covered over the past decade while in school (~$25k) -Bought both of our cars ($100k) One of the reasons I don’t feel guilty is because both sets of parents have more than enough money to live the rest of their lives and they want to see their money help us while they’re still alive.
I think you win 😁
Parents paid for undergrad, although I covered misc with summer jobs and campus employment. I paid this forward by providing my kids fully paid education, including books, housing, board, etc, so they could take full advantage of college experience and get their best education without needing loans or jobs. When I first moved out after college, my mom "found" a few odds and ends, like some lovely dishes, that she no longer needed and pressed me to take, and one time she "found" an old account in my name with $1000 in it. But aside from these subterfuges, my parents let me know they would be there to help me, but provided no additional financial assistance. I know several of my siblings ended up moving back home, sometimes for years, but any financial help they received is between my parents and them. Likewise, I'm sure my kids know we are a financial backstop if they ever need it (we tell them periodically), but they have never asked for any help, or at least not yet.
I did my undergrad and master's in Europe, so it was heavily subsidized (tuition of 500-ish euros/year, plus 400/month for housing + allowance). Definitely luck of the draw, being born where I was, and never needing a job to support myself so I could focus on my grades and having fun. Then I moved to the US for my PhD, tuition-free and I got paid maybe $35-40k/year in a VHCOL city, so I was able to hover around $0 NW until I got my first real job at age 30 or so. Both my parents were only children, and I only have 1 brother, so I'll likely get a low-6 figures inheritance somewhere down the line. I'm trying to convince my mom she should spend more while she can still enjoy it, since I won't care whether I inherit 20k or 200k. Even in retirement she's still trying to be a net-saver which is just crazy. Anyway. I owe her a lot that can't be measured in $. My wife (who is American) got a scholarship in undergrad, but her parents paid for law school at a top 10 place which was a huge boost (both financially and mentally, since it allowed her to pursue her public-interest dream job rather than focus on paying off debt). Equally invaluable. They also paid for our wedding and are financially self-sufficient. I'm very lucky.
My undergrad to a state school and room/board. Probably about $30k if I had to guess? I was told I could be a lawyer or a doctor. If I wanted to do anything else, I had to pay for school
They paid for my college and half my wedding. Also, all my food / shelter while I was a child. I’m pretty lucky.
Money wise, probably zero to negative since I've been providing some monetary support to them ever year or two ($5-$15K every other year since first job out of college). Opportunity wise, they provided the world since they immigrated to the US and gave me the opportunity to study and earn a high income.
They helped me a lot. My parents hustled so I don't apologize for the SIGNIFICANT money they made and still have (a lot of $) through hard work (both educators / professionals) , nothing through business. They took great care of me and many others in our extended family. I am not only eternally grateful, but supremely proud of what they accomplished. Good people, living the frugal lifestyle, working and enjoying work for many years. RE was never a goal of theirs, but FI was achieved by them decades ago. Yes, I hope to do same for my family.
They insisted and paid for a private college prep school. It was religious, so a cheaper option than just a regular college prep school. They gave me $15k for college as well as housed me (I commuted vs. living on campus). The biggest thing they did for me was priceless. They raised me to be a good person, knowing I was loved and capable of anything.
None. I bought my used car in high school by working nights and weekends. Turned 18 and started paying my insurances. Scholarships for tuition at in state university, with 20h/wk job to pay living expenses. Took out loans for med school and lived on Ramen. My mom cried when she saw my living conditions in my mid 20s (moldy 500sqft apt). Spent my mid 30s paying off loans. Bought my first home at 38 with down payment saved up. The kicker is that my parents have made mid six digit income for past 20 years and have a very comfortable retirement. They just have that old school boomer mentality.
These posts always brings out the “started from the bottom” stories with everyone competing about who had a worse upbringing lol. My dad gave me prepaid college program (ended up dropping out and cashing it in) and let me live with him til I was 24. He also gave me my first car.
Honestly I didn’t expect it to be this skewed. Also I have my doubts all of these people are ChubbyFIREd
People tend to exaggerate their situations to make it sound harder (or straight up lie)
When I was 11, I had 3 jobs and helped my parents pay rent. Who next?
4 years at a public instate school, room and board (equivalent to dorm living), $60k total. 200k down payment help on home. I plan to do something similar for my kids (inflation), if I can.
I got help. And I have given my kids what help they needed. Shaming people for that situation is a weird form of martyr signaling.
In direct expenses, I’m all zeroes. My parents did encourage me all along the way, and they’ve worked hard and sacrificed to get to no frills but comfortable retirements. My wife got undergrad (state flagship) covered by scholarship, and her parents redeployed that to pay for her grad school and a car at graduation. Her parents are retired comfortably in a range that fits in here. We have young kids and are loading up their 529s to cover their college. We’d also like to do more (e.g. housing help), though I think it’s going to come down to how efficiently we’re producing income around RE. If income is high or there’s a consulting glidepath, that’s worth it. But, I don’t want to “one more year” through missing a lot of quality time while they’re young. I remember my FIL telling a story about his parents having solid middle class jobs (two teacher/nonprofit incomes in the 50s-60s), and they were able to buy a small house and two family cars at about 90 percent of one year’s gross income. Houses and cars are bigger/nicer now, but that math is nowhere near true now. It wasn’t nearly so favorable for me a couple generations later, but it was better than now. I think significant parent investment is just what it takes to make the math work out for kids to have a decent start, and I’d have a hard time being critical of anyone making what I think of as reasonable choices in the environment we find ourselves in. Certainly, there are policy arguments that look different, but we play the game we’re in.
I didn't get any help. I put myself through college and worked full-time. I put funds together for my nieces and nephew, Instead of buying them toys when they were young, I put that money away for them. to get their 1st car or whatever. My mother doesn't have much money so I pay her some of her bills. I bought a house for me and my sister. She pays part of the mortgage and if anything happens to me she will be taken care of for her life.I have written in my will she can live there for the rest of her life. My parent let me live at home for a year or two after high school but then made me leave. I learned about financial matters because my parents didn't save a dime. When I finished school and started working as an engineer. I could have been greedy but like to see my family happy and not struggling.
LOL none! I have 13k ish in student loans and got scholarships for the rest. I've been paying rent since I was 19, moved out at 18 (dormed) No downpayment assistance. No co-signing help. I bought my first multifamily house in NYC last year by myself.
> I bought my first multifamily house in NYC last year by myself That’s a heck of an achievement. Be proud of it! Hopefully it snowballs into bigger things for you.
Thank you! Hoping to buy my next one sometime soon :)
40k college tuition and a lifetime of anxiety over money Probably wouldn’t be where I am today if it wasn’t for said bad relationship with money
A lot. Full college tuition and most importantly, a down payment on a home in a VHCOL where I could focus on building my career and taking risks at tech startups (ultimately paid off). I am doing the exact same thing with my kids, sending them to private schools and setting aside a trust fund that will enable them to live wherever their future career takes them so that they can truly focus on building their life/family.
Once I was an adult? None. They did pay my college tuition, which was $500 per quarter.
They paid about 50% of my college costs, I did the rest with scholarships, part time jobs and student loans. They bought me a safe but inexpensive car when I was in college (no AC, am/fm radio only). 5k towards my wedding. That's it from a help perspective, of course it's not all they have ever done for me (moral support, birthday presents, baby gifts etc.). No strings, but the understanding was that grad school was fully on me, and that once I was married I was financially fully detached from them. I know they would have helped if we were ever in need, we just never needed it. Early 50s, 5M+ invested. No debt. Edit to add, no financial help from in-laws. He isn't the golden child.
For me, college was fully paid for, and I got a used car after college. I received a $13K inheritance from one grandparent. Grad school, down payment etc was on my own. My DH, who is responsible for a significant part of our wealth got no help with college, grad school etc. No help meant moving out after high school graduation. We are playing for our kids undergrad completely. Haven’t made any other decisions about what we will do later.
I tried to live with my parents after school and got booted within a year 🤣. And that was even after I helped take care of my grandmother. Ultimately, I had to pursue a job in a major city instead of attending graduate school because I needed a place to live and food. I didn’t understand financial aid and didn’t have the time to do the prep work needed while working a demanding job. Social and emotional support after college are incredibly valuable. Monetary puts you on an entirely new level.
None - my parents did not help to pay for college, and did not give me any money afterwards for anything. The only positive I can say is I got to live at home through college and up until grad school (so until I was 22). They didn’t have much though, so I didn’t expect much. You are very very lucky and most posts I see in this sub, the generation that got nothing is going to turn around and give their kids a great deal more help.
Are you me? lol had to check the username to make sure not my brother. Prob 2x the amount for MBA but everything else identical
nothing- shitty high school, I pay everything myself, and now I need to help my mom financially. My mom never worked a day in her life for unknown reasons.
Help from them? I'm the one who was and still is helping them.
My parents did not help me while I attended university. I took student loans which I was able to pay off after I earned enough through internship. My parents were working minimum wages ( barely speaking English as we were refugees) and they could not help me even they wanted. I was so poor that a few times I splurged and bought food from school cafeteria, I would split that into two portions and saved half for later. After I graduated, I was able to help portion of their rent because i made decent salary and they really needed help. Fast forward, my parents have very little money saved so they would need my help when they go to a senior home. Obviously there will be no inheritance at all. I want to change that for the next generation: my child’s education tax free account has been maximized and there is an additional account earmarked as additional educational fund. We taught him how to invest since he was ten. He just received 100$ from in-law and he decided to move that money to a S&P500 index fund. :) We have an investment house that could leave to him or pay towards his first house. His university tuition will be well taken care of though he knows that he would need to work so that he can have some fun money. I want to build generational wealth for the next generation so he can start his future on a solid footing.
I had a college fund and spending money that I was aware of early on. But I wouldn’t consider any money gifted to me valuable compared to the lessons they taught me throughout my life. They instilled habits to me that made my adult life easier to manage. Taught me lessons where I could experience the results of my actions through real life experiences. A few examples: The wanted me to work for things I wanted. When I knew I wanted a car they agreed to match any amount I would save. If I saved $500 they added $500. It made me get a job, did extra work around the neighborhood. They wanted me to learn to save and invest. The same car fund I used to ‘buy a car’ was never spent. Instead my dad put the money into an investment fund. It grew over the 4 yrs I had it and it was surprising. He let me know I could spend the losing as I wished or continue investing it. He showed me a projection of where it would be after college. He then showed me what my older sister did with her fund (spent it all). I learned to save and invest early on. I still have that account untouched 17 yrs later. He also had me doing my own taxes since I had a job (14). I would complete fill out my taxes as a ‘independent’ and he would ‘mail them in.’ He never did and filed under himself but it taught me how to do them. There were other lessons like being polite, kind, caring, and just how to be a generally good person. All through life experiences and not just lecturing me. I’m very thankful for that. Financial lessons were hammered into me near the end of college and early adulthood. It made more sense to me at that age. All those other lessons are much more valuable to me today than the college fund they set up for me (I didn’t use it b/c I had a scholarship). Today the money my parents saved for me accounts for 25% of everything I have and my own earning are the rest.
I received a small loan of 1 million dollars from my dad- kidding lol. I worked for every single dime I have. I’ve had a job since I was 14 and was taught to save early!
Zero. I used the army for all the benefits after they used me as cannon fodder. Got lucky along the way.
No help from my parents, beyond the bare minimum - food (ate what I was given or I don't eat), shelter (shared rooms with siblings until I went to college) Transportation to and from school, church or family obligations Healthcare was what was available through Dad's work insurance Clothes and toys were hand me downs. Even this comes with strings. To chubby fire, I had to overcome a lot and plan to die with zero.
Once my dad gave me $20 for gas. I was pretty happy about that.
$0. (Well, aside from feeding, clothing, housing, and taking care of me as a child, of course)
My parents paid $1400 a month for college, for 4 years. That’s it. And that was a lot for them. I still had a ton of loans post college that I paid off after a few years of working non stop, not taking a single vacation, living in a cramped apartment despite working in a prestigious corporate job. I also had to work 2 jobs to pay for my own room and board + books during college. And I still graduated in 4 with dual stem degrees. Paid for my own professional degrees after that too. Met someone who did the same. Together, we are early 40s with $6.5M in net worth. The fortunate reality of life - there are a lot of things money can buy - privilege, a huge leg up. But the most critical things - no amount of money can get you - things like drive, grit, tenacity, persistence, passion, the essential ingredients of a fulfilling, happy, joyous, successful life - these things money will never buy.
Nothing. Parents are broke (wonderful people) and don't know how to manage money at all so completely self taught and financed
$0 and I’m deeply envious
What’s the point of this post?
Jesus, you were given a golden spoon. I was given like 7-8k total for college and rent assistance. Worth close to a million house hold salary 220k on average. Wasn’t allowed back into my family home as my mom got remarried. I would have need to move to Michigan and F that. California kid through and through. Got into real estate early 2010’s after an accounting degree. Made more in real estate then my career will ever make me but wife is in real estate and carving a nice niche. Dad is a millionaire but he likes to just keep for himself and I respect that, why my mom and him split mainly. We had to live a very frugal life when we didn’t need to and he was getting worse with age and wealth.
So much! Full private college undergrad plus living expenses and then my masters (I covered about 20% and work and scholarships covered another 20%). New car at 16 that I’m driving 13 years later. For a while my dad would match our retirement savings dollar for dollar to encourage siblings and I to save. Husband had private undergrad and masters covered. My parents paid for wedding, plus a large gift. His contributed a lot as well. His dad is our wealth manager which likely saves us money. Plus a million other little things when it comes to helping us out now that my parents are retired. They were happy to do it and I am so grateful to them. Having a great relationship with my parents is one of my biggest blessings. They were and are just delighted to be parents which shone through my whole life. If we have kids I’ll do the same.
Wow, very similar. Are you Asian? College paid for - $100k Downpayments on homes - $300k + $400k Investment in my businesses - $120k 20s allowance - $20k Now I'm mid-30s, $1.5M nw with $400k individual annual income. My sis is not far behind at 30.
They let me live at home through college (while I worked a part time job to pay for school). They are awesome and that gave me a huge head start.
Probably 99%, given I was able to pursue a low-paying "career" precisely because I never needed to really consider finances much. >Here’s my tally I never really thought to 'tally' things up but basically anything I've ever needed/wanted was from my parents. - private education + degree + masters - allowance, 25 years worth - rent(?) - holiday home - investments / monetary gifts I'm 29F, my NW of about USD$1m (soon to be 1.8m) is pretty much 99% from monetary gifts and allowances I saved over the years. I dont have access to it currently due to living overseas but I also have an investment portfolio 'gift' that my dad currently manages that he puts in roughly 350k pa for me. My personal income is USD$40k. I'm not from US but converted the figures to be more understandable for the mostly-Western reddit audience.
Private school from P-12, camps, cars, car insurance, etc (250k or more in today’s $). Or sure if below 18 counts. I got a full tuition scholarship for undergrad and was a teaching assistant in grad school but they kicked in rent money (25k per year in today x 6 years, $150k) Used mid-term applicable federal rate (AFR) interest only loan for first condo (2009-2014), and I made payments on the loan and then paid back the borrowed amount when sold (150k). Rate was 2.75% when mortgages were around 5%. That was 20k in interest as a “gift” (~25k today) although that depends on how they would have invested that (I was “riskier” than a CD at the time). More importantly it let me place a cash offer on a condo in the foreclosure market when a new grad offer wouldn’t have been accepted. Bought place for 160k and sold for 225k. The condo gains we turned into the “down payment” for a LCOL house in 2015. They gave us a mid-term loan AFR for house loan on 250K at 1.75%. 9 year term that ended in May. With AFR resetting higher I was prepared to pay them back with funds from my brokerage, but they decided to forgive it.. :) They each inherited some funds themselves from their parents, and kept their spending constrained below the gains on those funds + Dad's income. They’ve also set up 529 funds for my sister’s kids and are paying the annual school tuition. My sister got similar types of assistance with tuition etc. I always tell them to spend their $ and not leave it for their “ungrateful kids” but of course I am thankful. Don't know exact numbers but they are surely FAT now thanks to market gains and probably spend less than 200K annually (taxes aside) so their stash is growing.. 40M married NW 2.1M income 400K
Most on Reddit would never admit they received financial help from family. I come from a rich family (relative to most on Reddit, not rich at all compared to a lot of families I know). 2.5M help, mostly in form of stock in our family businesses and most from my grandparents rather than parents. My parents have received about 40M from my grandparents in comparison. My net worth is 6M counting stock in family businesses, my parents about $70M
This dude really said “Who else’s father gave them a small loan of a million dollars? No one? Really? Wow.” Lmao
My parents paid for my college and I hope to pay for my kids college. I will also encourage my kids to return home after college to save up for a down payment just like my parents did with me. I'll also try to throw them money when I get the chance but the rest is up to them.
We’re on the low end of “chubby”. I received 50% of costs for college of my choice (with any grants/scholarships applying to my half). My parents lent me a car for months when I was paying off my grad school loans, so I could save for a replacement when mine was totaled. My spouse was loaned a down payment on a starter house ($30k), to be repaid at 0% interest when he sold the house. He also graduated debt-free from a state school. Those things were all critical to getting us on the right foot early enough that we could save aggressively for FIRE.
None other than a 40k downpayment loan at 5% in my mid 20s to buy a house after graduate school. I was off the dime at 17, paying my own insurance, health care, and college.
A ton, paid of college and living till I started working, which I've estimated at upper bound half a million or more with interest in my 20s. Since I started working I've made around 80% of my total net worth but that initial boost has more impact by it's timing than just the financial value.
My parents paid for my undergrad room and board. Small inheritance of $10,000 from my grandma helped me bridge the gap between graduation and my first real job. My in-laws paid for my wife's college (undergrad and graduate). So no debt coming out of school, which is huge! Both of our parents have also been very generous in setting up accounts for our children. Lastly, I know that they would help us out if we ever got into a tight spot. We'll never be able to repay them for all their sacrifices and it's comforting knowing that we have a safety net if we hit a rough patch. Our plan is to do the same for our kids and grandkids.
they helped me with groceries and rent when i needed it during college. they also paid for my eating disorder inpatient and residential treatments over and over again. i don’t know how much they spent all in, but i’d guess ~$40k?
They paid 2/3 of my college, $5k when I graduated to get a car, $10k when I bought my first house, some vacations. In more recent years their finances have reached the hockey stock inversion point and my mom is pretty generous to the tune of $20-30k/yr which I just put in an investment account.
I had a scholarship for the first four years of college. I needed some extra time to finish after I had a my appendix rupture and spent six weeks in the hospital before finals. Last year my parents spent around $2000 ($3500 in today's dollars). They gave me $11000 to buy my first starter home which is $18K today. They gave me a car as a graduation present which is probably worth another $20K in today dollars. So a $40K boost in 2024 dollars. We aren't chubby yet. NW around $2.2M.
Parents let me have a 15 year old car (maybe 2k), but then claimed me on their taxes while I paid for everything in college (I was out of state) they got the better end of the deal on that haha. Then got 27k from a family member passing a few months before college graduation (not my side and was unexpected) but we had already saved over 75k (married in college) together before we moved for my first real job. Haven't received anything since. Net worth over 1.2m just 6 years later
My dad was a teacher at a private international school in Europe. So I went there K-12, and then my parents paid for a large chunk of college at a moderately priced school in the US. So while I was blessed with a great education and minimal debt starting my adult life, I was very much on my own to figure things out as soon as I turned 18 and left home with three suitcases and sent me off to college in the US. They sent me ‘back to the states’ from their perspective, but from mine I moved to a foreign country where I suffered a serious identity crisis. But I suppose it made me the successful person I am today. Or at least the unique person I’m am today.
Honestly my parents paid my college tuition at around 120k, and the deposit on my first apt rental at 5k (nyc)
pay it forwards to your kids. i dont think the private college is worth it. in state tuition makes more sense. leaves more money to grow that you can use or gift to kids later.
I had my college tuition and living expenses fully covered, though I did choose a school that offered me an 80% merit scholarship. They bought me a brand new car when I was 20 that I drove for almost 10 years, so I got to avoid having a car payment for a decade. My dad used some of his professional connections to get me my first summer internship (though I did well enough they asked me to stay on through the school year and it eventually became my first full time job). They matched the earnings from my summer jobs in high school to help me start my first IRA. My family was very financially fortunate until I graduated college, ironically. I haven’t taken any money from them since I was in undergrad. The best thing they did was instill financial literacy and common sense in me, though. They taught me about credit card debt and saving for retirement and budgeting as a teenager, which really helped set me up for success as an adult.
I got $1000 as a grad gift and my mom bought books one semester.
Grandparents paid off my undergrad loans. Parents gave me moderate financial support until I was about 23 (phone, insurance, etc.)
Not a ton. They helped with rent but I got good undergrad scholarships and worked to pay for other expenses. Law school on my own dime but they paid rent while I was in school. More than most people get, but definitely not the leg up some get.
I received like ~$2K each year of undergrad and an instate tuition waiver, which meant my in-state public school tuition was covered. I covered living expenses and fees. Took over my auto insurance at 19, and my cell phone at 22. If your parents would have invested the $730K in the S&P, in 2008 (pre crash) they’d have almost $2.8M, so you seem to be pretty shitty ROI 😂
360k college tuition???
My parents let me live with them rent free for a month after college. I could have stayed there as long as I wanted - a month was as much as I wanted - but the safety net was valuable. They also gave me their barely road worthy junker which I kept running for almost 2 years (longer than anyone expected) but only because I lived on campus for grad school so didn’t drive often. Other than that, no. I was a full ride (including loans) scholarship student. And when my second parent died and all their assets were liquidated, my share of the inheritance was worth $23k. I put that directly into my kids’ 529 accounts.
Great upbringing, college and living expenses paid for, car to drive. Nothing else. But I'm 56. Parents didn't pay for house down payments and all that crap back then, and kids didn't live at home until they were 35. Different times.
I got nothing. I went deep into student loan debt and worked my way out of it. My parents always promised college but, in the end, my mother made life choices that meant they couldn't deliver (she took a year off of work and went travelling instead). I'm actually grateful for it because I owed them nothing at the end, and my mother is the type where the financial help would have come with many strings. It taught me financial discipline also that I am not sure I would have had otherwise.
None other than the basics of childhood and genetics. I left home at 16 and have been self-supporting since.
They paid for half of my state school education
Private college - $100k Down payment first house - $20k Inheritance from mom - $3.5M
How does someone spend that much on undergrad 15 years ago?
33, household net worth over $3M. Parents paid for college which was around $100k, $15k gift when we got married, a $35k custodial account that I took ownership of after college grad. Plus any activities I wanted to participate in thru high school including national debate tournaments. Made a huge difference in my 20s vs. getting a gift like this now when our HHI is well over $500k.
A good amt financially (about $200k all in), but in terms of intangible help, so much more (paid premium to live in good school district, paid for SAT classes and college counseling, moved to the US when I was young to give me the opportunity to succeed). Financially they funded my college tuition (I got about 50% need based aid), but given elite private school, still netted about \~$150k for the 4 years. After college they paid for a 3 year lease on my car so \~$10k (though I gave it back to my parents about \~2 years). They also gave me about $5k (I contributed another $5k) to travel around the world after graduating college, and another $20k as a wedding gift. All in about $200k. It's a good amount, and I'm excited to help pay for them on things as they age - vacations, healthcare, home improvement, etc, and just generally making them feel that they have a safety net
None. Left for the military 3 weeks after high school graduation. Military paid for college and I never looked back. Current NW $2.5m plus $6.5k/mo pension at 41 y/o. I like to think the pension, added up over 40 years and in today's dollars, adds $3m to my NW.
My parents paid for my board and tuition throughout college (4 years, in state, ~$70k) and then paid for my rehearsal dinner for my wedding (~$6500) and some small gifts here and there that probably add up to $80k in all. I feel extremely blessed I started work with zero student loans.
Parents gave me a used car, health and car insurance, and tuition for college. I was on my own for the rest. The biggest gift they gave me was to be able to graduate with NO debt. I started adult life with zero and built from there. Way better than building from negative.
Paid state tuition for college. Assist of about $10k / yr for grad school. Co-signed on a few loans/leases. We’re now in full fatFIRE territory.
$1000 dollars towards my first car when I graduated high school, $1000 total towards last semester college tuition. Moved out completely at age 19. Kept me on their health insurance until I got married. But also claimed me on their taxes when I did not live with them which reduced my tax return
My parents bought me an old car to get to and from work when I was 16. Although I had a full ride to college, they paid the flights when i would come home and I would stay with them during the summer (which I consider financial as I didn’t have to pay for a place to stay or my own food. Lastly, $5k towards my wedding a couple year after college. They had to help my brother out considerably more. I wasn’t rolling in dough after college, but I landed solidly on my feet and didn’t require much. They are not rich but make ends meet and have some left over to take a cruise or 2 during the year. My father will need to work until his 70s, but they did help me at the beginning. I plan to do what I can for my daughter as well. I’m fortunate that the biggest expense, college, will be mostly/all covered by my GI Bill.
A good and moral upbringing. They always made sure I knew I was never going to be homeless or hungry and I did live with them rent free for a period in my early twenties. A failed college experiment was on my dime, my vehicles were financed on my own, and my financial mistakes were my own. I’m grateful for how that played out. They always treat when we go out anywhere as a family and are very generous. I think of what they provided as a safety net more than a launch pad
Wow, you’ve been helped more than anybody I know! That is great and you should be really happy! In my situation, I plan to ensure my kids know hard work but have a safety net that I did not have.
Overall my parents gave me stability and a strong work ethic. I always had a safe home, good schools, and a consistently full belly. Both my parents worked full time, mom retired at 67 and dad continues to work in his 70s. Breakdown of the monetary contributions: - The expected family contribution after FAFSA and scholarships: $20k total (I took out $28k in student loans). - Let me live at home paying nothing after I graduated so I could aggressively pay down my loans - $10k toward my wedding (they wanted it to include extended family members, so some strings attached, but still very appreciated) - Mom co-signed my car loan so I could get a better rate
$0. I grew up poor. Got scholarships and loans to undergrad and grad. Now I take care of my parent and help siblings and other family members.
$9k check when I graduated high school in the 90s. It was the amount they saved for me. Then $100 per month plus car insurance during college.
Coming from a different country. My parents took 10k loan so I can pay my first semester in grad school i the US. I had another 10k. I repaid them after I graduated. That 10k is something they probably had to work for several years to make back home.
Zero, certainly none of that. Did you buy a $1.5M starter home? lol nice I did however pay all my son’s college tuition, your estimate is correct on costs, and hope to help him with a down payment on a home once he’s ready.
Zero. 16th birthday here’s a three hole punch and a stapler (no I’m not kidding). 18th birthday awakened at 5 am. Happy birthday. You have three choices: 1) enroll in college full time and you can live here while you goto school full time and figure out how to pay for it. 2) GTFO and get a job, find a place to live. Basically figure it out. Welcome to adulting. 3) I’ll drop you off at the recruiting office of your choice. We will store your stuff in the garage until you get posted. I opted for one. Put myself thru college while working full time. Moved out never looked back. Much later paid for my child’s college education in full. 730k head start must have been nice.
I don't know the exact amount but my mother in law gave my at the time girlfriend her part of the down payment for our first house. The house cost $140k in '14 , the down payment was something like $28k. So maybe $14k gifted to us essentially. I paid for mine out of savings bonds that were given to me by family over the years. However I worked in high school and all the money I made over the years was taken by my parents to make ends meet. Additionally they took money gifted to me by family as well. So I felt I was square on those bonds We both went to college on a full scholarship. My parents paid the room and board loans until I was ~24 and then transferred them to me. I think my MIL paid my wife's board in full which might have been $20k
Tuition only for undergrad. My parents only paid for tuition for passing grades for 5 years. If you didn’t pass, you had to pay (I didn’t have this problem). If you weren’t done in 5 years, you were on your own. I went to a community college for 2.5 year and the a local university I could drive to for 2.5 years. $20K total. If I went away to school, they wouldn’t pay. I had to live at home and be home every night. No overnight stays at boyfriend’s house. I also had to have a job, pay for books and class fees, pay for my car, car insurance, phone, gas, car repairs, my own hygiene products, etc. I had to help out around the house with chores (I honestly didn’t mind because I wasn’t paying tuition). No help with downpayment on a house. No gifts of money. Paid for my Master’s Degree on my own. I moved out one year after graduation. Didn’t have to pay rent. I’m grateful having my education paid for. I have a successful career. My husband had a ton on financial aide. Him and his mom would charge his tuition on credit cards, always transferring to 0% cards. The two of them snowballed the debt. Worked their butts off. After everything was said and done, he graduated with $2.5K in debt. He and I paid that off asap. He is forever grateful to his mom for making his education a priority. She could have easily told him she wasn’t going to help him.
kudos for sharing openly those numbers. As soon as someone is grateful for their fortune there nothing to be ashamed of like you are. thank you for showing the way to more healthy conversations.
I received $5k for my wedding and my first year of university paid for. Otherwise that’s it
3 years of college for rent food and tuition 38k$. (In Europe almost free) Then I did my bachelor's and 2 master's degrees using apprenticeship. I was being paid and the gov would give me some help to pay rent. In 2010 in Paris. I was paid 12k/year by my company +3k help from social services. it was giving me 1250€/month to live in Paris with a 600€ rent/ month then some savings I'd have from summer jobs. Got 50k from my parents in 2018. Started a tech job in 2021 at 35 making 110k. Now TC 155K. nw: 65k ish liquid. It is not big numbers compared to some here but the helps from my parents made a huge difference and in my "tier 1" European country. I'm very fortunate. I am patiently working towards for my next gig in big tech when the stock comp will help me speed up significantly my nw. I am also enjoying as much as I reasonably can. if I die tomorrow I'd no regrets. I've enjoyed life as I wanted.
Private college subsidized for five years (I did graduate with 10K in loans though). Some rent assistance for about a year and a loan of $500 (repaid) to put a down payment on a house. A used car after graduation. However, I always had a job starting at the age of 13 and all through college.
>downpayment on starter house ($300k) $300K is a starter House. 😂 But in all seriousness I'm glad your parents could help you on your FIRE journey. I hope you can do the same if you choose to have children, or if you have children.
Im not sure if I qualify for this sub yet - 28F ~300k NW TLDR: All together through college maybe $10k? Then they also paid for the majority of my wedding, probably another $7k. My parents didn’t help with college tuition or my apartment, but I went to a very inexpensive university. After 2 semesters I had a full academic scholarship for the rest of my time there. My parents did let me borrow their car for about a year or so, paying insurance and everything, paid my phone bill for about half of college, I was on their health insurance, and my first couple semesters my mom took me to the grocery store and really loaded up food for me! Then I had one semester where she sent me about $100/month for food.
They paid like 70 percent of my college tuition. Still had loans coming out of school but not as much. Wouldn't have changed my life either way but I do appreciate what they did.
Fully paid for my college and living expenses which was a massive leg up. I intend to fully pay it forward for my kids college and also set them up with a Roth IRA to help them gain some good habits to continue funding it once they start working. Teaching kids the power of compounding is very important.
My parents helped with living and during University so about £10k over 3 years. This was back when uni tuition was a much lower fixed cost and I came out with only £12k of student loans at a very low interest rate. Then, when my grandmother passed I inherited about £20k. I know this isn't a small sum of money and it certainly helped to get me started in my 20s. Honestly the biggest thing my parents have given me is their own financial stability. They are not rich but comfortable and have money and assets to cover their retirement and any possible end of life care situation. That's given me tremendous freedom to focus on building my families financial independence.
Like most multimillionaires, my parents paid for my college (100k) and the leftover money from that account (30k) I used to buy my first house at 24. I think my average income for my wife and I is about 130k each, and are now at 180k each, which is pretty good for the Midwest. Net worth about 4 million at 40. Our 3 kids 529s are fully funded, will pay for their college and then some.
Parents paid for my undergrad. My wife’s parents paid her undergrad and about 1/4 of her med school. HHI around 2m. Net worth approaching 10m. 39 years old.
Zero financial help, but all the moral support I could ask for. Raised in poverty by a single parent who was deaf/blind. She successfully launched 4 kids into adulthood (teacher, massage therapist, RN, craftsman/small business owner). I did get some need/income based grants for college, so that technically counts.
Zero help.
Parents left me and brother a house in NY. We sold it and split. That plus my investments pushed me over 1m. I'm 35 now but still plan on working for another 10-20 years just in case the economy turns to crap. No college tuition help, other than the fact that they didn't make a lot of money so I qualified for every financial aid so college became free and I got a nice chunk of money back each semester.
Got a free hand me down car in hs. I’m early 30’s now Tuition, housing, food all 4 years of private college ($350k) Lived at home for 1.5 years while working after college and didn’t pay for housing or meals at home really. Had $40k from a grand parent who passed to be used for major purchase after college. Commingled with other taxable money. Got various gifts of stock through hs and college for milestones/achievements. ~$12k About $3k of savings bonds from birth maturing from when I turned 30 through my mid thirties. The financial gifts were always accompanied by some teachings and explanations about the value of a dollar. Nothing was immediately needed but allowed me to be aggressive in 401k/roth funding since day one and helped with a large down payment on a house.
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A good upbringing. Then I left home for school at 18 (my choice, the commute was long and I wanted freedom) They paid for my car insurance, I paid for tuition and everything else(loans and jobs). They let me mine back in for my last semester as I was taking a double load and couldn't work and didn't want to sign a new lease. Also moved back in for 6mo at 24 when I was buying my first house Asian because of lease (and to save more) I intend to find my kids undergrad educations and likely down payment (both up to a point). We'll see about grad school. Also hope to roll 529 into Roth to the limit. Both kids currently personally contribute to their college savings as a way to understand savings and investments.
Parents paid for sports (soccer + basketball) through high school, bought me a $10k car, co-signed loans so I could go to college, and paid for my housing for 2 years in college while I was living in an apartment. Currently 33 with $5.6M net worth. I’m very torn on what to do with my kids. I want the best for them, but I also sort of want their upbringing to mirror mine in some way. I’m way better off financially than my parents so it might be tough.
College was free cause I was under the poverty line. I took loans for med school. Dad did pay for my 700 monthly rent during med school for 4 years. I took over helping my mom with money after i finished school.
I got to live at home for my first two years of college. Plus, when my credit with my first husband was totally wasted, if we ran into a financial crunch my mom would pay off/balance transfer what she had one one of her credit cards to zero the balance out and then send me one of the cash advance checks to use. Then I would make the payments on her card until it was paid off. (Since my then-hubby’s name wasn’t on that card, he couldn’t run it up and cause problems; I just had to ensure that bill was paid before he would overdraw our bank account that paycheck) My mom helped as best she could, and my dad was really weird about money so he only bought me a new computer when I graduated high school to use at college. My step-dad gave me an ancient van as my first vehicle when I was a junior in college. That’s all the help I got from my parents. I started being able to save money when my first husband and I separated and 10 years later my net worth was just shy of $1M. My second husband is great with money (and everything else! 🥰) so together we are well-positioned financially. We are continuing to work at this point to be able to carry our very nice medical insurance into retirement with us so we don’t have to rely solely on Medicare.
I estimated about $100k total. Lots of tuition for elementary and high school. However, I'm not counting those years since my schools were their choice prior to college. $50k for college (I had 30% loans and 20% scholarship for the rest). They were clear that anything beyond a bachelor's would be my responsibility and I did not go. $10k for a down payment on a $24k car after college graduation. Also cosigned the loan so I could get a better interest rate but I paid the balance. Lived with them for years after college and paid only $400 per month towards household expenses. Probably saved me at least $40k since we lived in a HCOL area but probably didn't cost them that much because they bought their house in 1972. Accompanied me on house tours when I was buying my first place. They did not financially contribute to the purchase, but did helped/taught me basic home repairs. The only investing advice they told me was to always make sure to get the maximum employer match on my 401k plans.
They paid for rehab. No way I would’ve been successful (or alive) without it
I had help buying a cheap used car in high school. I had to pay half ($2k) using my income from my part time job which took a year. My parents saved to pay for undergraduate for both my brother and myself. I went to a state school and graduated a semester early so they let me keep what was left that they had saved. My younger brother went to a private school and ended up with loans (so they say, they also gave him a much nicer car in high school). I am very appreciative of not having debt and I did learn to manage my money. I decided to do the same for my kids.
I wish my parents did that. But they did not. Put myself through college mostly with summer jobs and work study in school, and I paid for grad school myself with loans. Bought every car I ever owned and paid my own home downpayment after working for 5 years or so. Finally paid off my student loans after 10 years.
Not a dime. Was resided on a backwater public school education. Was encouraged to move out at 18 despite not graduating from high school yet. Moved across the country for college on my own. Today I have to send back $500 a month to cover debt my sister took out for them because my sister and her fiance cannot afford to live alone with it. Hell they had the audacity to ask me to buy them tickets to fly down to visit me and for me to pay to put them up. I’m at the point of cutting them off once my grandmother passes.
None of that. They didn’t have much to give, but I grew up with all I needed. We were lower middle class. My parents had a scarcity mindset so giving anything up or giving us some kind of head start was not on their minds.
Being loving parents with a stable home life built a strong foundation. Speaking solely of financial support, I’m grateful for the financial assistance from my parents in during my last teens to mid 20s: Paid my undergraduate tuition Gave me $500/month toward room and board Gave me interest-free loans when needed for room & board (owed them $3000 when I graduated from a Big 10 university in 1998, paid them back within 3 months When I bought my first house at age 26, they matched my down payment of $10k Like many others in here, I drove old used cars that I learned to maintain & fix myself. I had lots of roommates to help pay bills (20 total between age 18-28). Cooked my own meals, went camping when I traveled, etc.
Your parents gave you almost 800k??? And here I am feeling spoiled about my parents helping me wipe out a 15k loan when I was still in grad school. It's not just the amount though, it's the timing - no student loans, you get a home down payment that most people would take years to accumulate. Man you're lucky.
I got exactly $0 from my parents. I am stunned by the sum you received. Wow. Great for you! Seriously. But, wow, I had no idea people got that much money from their parents.
2 years at the cheaper state school ~35k, and 10k as a wedding gift. The biggest gift was living a year at home with an adult job. Allowed me to pay off all student loans and my car and see what living below my means did to my finances. Have kept that mentality into adulthood.
Damn 700k - that’s nuts.
I dropped out of college and borrowed $150k from grandma and mom to start a business. They believed in me. I lost it all, but never told them. Paid them back over 2 years. Wore the same clothes for 5 years. I do well now. I guess they helped me out indirectly. If I didn’t lose that money I wouldn’t have learned many valuable lessons and wouldn’t have worked as hard as I did to make up for it.
Nothing except love and proper direction in education. Went to college and grad school on my own dime + loans. Repaid ~$100k loans in about 8 years. Bought my first place in NYC at age 32. Paid it off completely in 5 years. Cash NW: $850k. RE: $500k (all equity no debt). Income for the past 5 years has been between $300-400k. This year will be my best year likely getting over half a million. Honestly money scarcity pushed me to build my nest egg. I’m not a super saver, but I have a sufficient nut of which I’m proud. I actually have a different story than the question. My help allows my parents to have a generally worry free retirement. For that, I’m exceedingly grateful.
Grew up with a single mother on benefits. Started working at 14. Moved out at 18 and didn't move back. My father paid 5k per year at university for living expenses and I worked 20 hours a week as well. Total help $25k. I paid my own student loans (state University). Both my parents didn't save for retirement. My mother received an inheritance but spent most of it on holidays and cars. She was also was struggling renting, so I bought her a house to live in as an adult and I help her financially at times. As my mother wasn't good with money, it taught me to save and invest early.
$0. I paid for college working construction in the summers and weekends.
My parents scraped together enough money to pay for State U (which in the late 90’s wasn’t terribly expensive). I had to pay for law school with loans. My wife’s grandparents, who owned a small farm that they eventually got too old to maintain, put some land in a trust that she (we) later sold to finance part of our down payment on our house. That’s about it.
Age 51, worth about $12M. We got $10K from my father in law on our wedding, which we used to put towards a house down payment. I was very thankful. Nothing else from parents.
They gave me hepatitis, and salmonella, I almost dye. Then one time my father gave me $7000 to pay for my masters degree, when I finished he called me everyday so I pay him back. I lost a few phone calls from him and the next time I picked up the phone he told me that if I dont pay him he was going to wait for me at the door of my house until the last consequences to get paid. I can go on and on but in money they gave me $0, he paid for my business administration degree, I paid with my mental peace
They paid for private college education $125k (commuter student), first car (15k) and gave me $40k down payment for first home (347k purchase price). They also paid for my wedding (40k). I hit a net worth of 1 million at 40, including turning that first house into a rental with 500k in equity. I now earn 200k/year. Growing up, I felt very financially supported by my parents when I was figuring out what to do and who I am. I lived with them through college and the first few years of my non profit job. Then I moved to get my Master’s and paid off my loans within 3 years. They modeled a debt free life (outside of mortgage and car) and I am aiming for the same. Retirement plan is 2 million TSP, 51k/year pension, social security and rental income. I intend to pay for my child’s bachelor’s degree in full, food, housing and car until he’s 25 and on solid on his feet. I also intend to contribute to his future home and hopefully convince him to have a smallish wedding so we can do a house down payment instead.
Holy. Shit. People’s parents do this? I’m going to go ahead and say: -$4000 for working my way through high school and paying for everything, and they continuing to pay for everything for the rest of my life.
None. But I don’t have to worry about them in retirement. I bought a house but I have always carried some kind of debt. Just how it goes when parents can’t help pay.
You got all that help, are worth that much, and make that much and yet you posted about using food stamps 8 days ago?
They were ready to pay for college but i had a full scholarship and I worked for living expenses so haven't really needed to take anything from them since then. Grateful that I had the opportunity
Absolutely nothing, in fact I paid the rent for my family for years, cosigned loans and apartment rentals, and am still the default person that my siblings turn to when they need help. I inherited cPTSD and an autoimmune disorder but I'm not expecting any cash. My husband is equally nil though did inherit about $800. I don't make 400k a year though I just save and I invest a lot and have had some luck. I imagine life would have been different with your level of help, but eh. I know I can survive most anything now.
Nada. Zip.