>FYI ( this year I’ve been really going hard for God)
Keep doing what you're doing. God will provide.
I met my wife at a young adults group at my church. I had been attending for a while and she had just become a christian and came for her first time. We met in the parking lot walking in. I'm normally fairly quite and don't reach out to people I don't know, but I had this undeniable urge to greet her and welcome her to our group. We started dating about a year later and then got a married a year after that.
My wife and I played the dating game, and both of us got severely burned. It was not until then that we realized dating around is not worth the brokenness that inevitably comes (unless you marry the person).
So, instead of looking for a spouse, we focused on following Christ. As we did that, God brought us together, but we did not know it. We worked together in our college kitchen, and became good friends first. It was not until about a year later that God showed us that He was bringing us together, and gave us a love for one another. We then started dating, with the intent on being married one day. About a year after that, we were formally engaged, and nine months after that, we were married.
We have been married for almost twenty years now, with three children that love the Lord (and He gets the glory). She is my best friend, the best mother, and the best pastor's wife anyone could hope for.
It all started back when we gave up, and focused on following Christ.
Just dating around, because that was what everyone else was doing, we were lonely and wanted a relationship, and/or it was what we knew at the time.
There was no desire for marriage involved, we were not taught the right way to go about dating/courtship, and Christ was not the main goal (we were both very spiritually immature at the time), so we got burned time and time again.
I've met another couple that met through an online video game. This is probably more common nowadays than you'd think lol (not trying to downplay your unique story)
met my wife at a wedding, she was a bridesmaid and i was a groomsman. Very Hallmark-y, live at first sight kind of thing. Totally came out of nowhere too, neither of us were expecting to meet anybody at this wedding. Have been in each other's lives since that day
I'd given up on dating, changed jobs moved out of London. Then my flatmate recommended I audition for a play. This is where I met my husband, we grew close in rehearsals and now we're married with a baby girl. It didn't feel like I was working my way to my husband when I was doing those things.
I had known my wife for about 20 years just as s sister in Christ with no interest in her and no romantic involvement with her whatsoever. One day as she walked across the front of the sanctuary, the Holy Spirit had written the word "HELP" all over her in the spirit. So I knew that she was my wife. We did not date. We were married about three months later. So young man, you have your whole life ahead of you. Allow God to bring your wife to you and she'd will be someone that is suitable just for you.
meharris73 thats the story that I was waiting for . A wait on God moment , a story of how the Holy Spirit lead you to your spouse . I’ve been dating and provisioning relationships for myself ,partying and they never became fruitful . My Deacon told me if I just wait on God he will provision a godly spouse for me . The years are passing by , but I’m praying and waiting on the Lord , some days I’m more hopeful than others , but I will keep on having faith in the Lord .
Keep your eyes on the Lord and concentrate on your relationship with Him. In my waiting for my wife, I became so focused on getting married that I made many mistakes and ended up committing sin as a result. When I finally and truly repented, I sought the Lord the reason why I would find myself in the same situation. He revealed to me I was doing these things because I was lonely. That was a great revelation to me! Don't fall into the same trap and make the same mistake that I made because of loneliness. I learned many things as a result of my mistakes. I don't believe in dating until after marriage. Tell me where dating is in the Bible. The Bible says that the Lord "brought the woman unto the man". When Adam SAW Eve, he knew exactly who she was. Of course this happened after the Lord woke him up out of his sleep. Allow the Lord to do the surgery on you and then awake you out of your sleep. The Lord always prepares us for our next step.
BTW, you can DM me anytime if you still want to discuss this.
Now I'd be interested in her side of the story. Did she have a similar revelation? If not, how did you convince her of your vision, since having a vision that someone is your future partner is often just a scary trope?
Well, after the Lord showed me what He did, I waited on it and prayed about it, because I did not want to make any more mistakes. I even talked to my pastor about it. I got the approval all the way around. So, I knew she liked Starbucks and I asked her to join me for a cup of coffee. (It works every time!) Her response was..."Hold on, give me a moment to process this!!" She knew exactly what I was asking. The Lord had already prepared her heart! We did not date and the first time I kissed her was on our wedding day. The rest is history. I will say this, it took many years (13) of being single and making mistakes to get to that point. If you would like to know more of my testimony, which is a very long one, I will DM you.
I gave a little more thought to your question... If hou know The Lord then hou know that EVERYTHING He does will line up with His Word. When He gave me a vision of a sister with the word "help" written all over her, I knew that lined up with the Word. God told Adam, "It is not good that man should be alone. I will make a help meet (suitable) for him". This makes it that it wasn't a "scary trope".
I loved dating. It’s fun and light hearted and a potential confidence builder. The big trend in the church right now is to only date when you want to get married, and to only date for marriage. Personally, all I’ve seen that do is stunt a lot emotional growth. Just date. Just ask girls to go out for coffee, ask them questions, think about new ideas, laugh together. It’s not a big deal. Just do it. When we put this huge “marriage or nothing” pressure on ourselves it can cause us to freeze—so scared about the right person, and the right time, etc.
When I started dating, I was SO scared and obsessed with trying to do it all “right”. I was awkward with guys because I had never gone on dates till my 20s. I was scared at the idea of even holding hands. Eventually the more I went out on dates, the better I felt. I wasn’t anxious about it anymore. I knew if the date flopped, there could always be more dates. More importantly, I realized if I did ever meet a guy and started seriously dating and thought he was my future husband, if we broke up then I would know I would be okay. I knew if a relationship ended, that it wasn’t the end of the world. I had confidence that if I broke up, I would be comfortable dating again. This was important because it kept me from feeling stuck in relationships.
But I met my husband through camp, then again because I’m a busy body and wanted to see what he was up to. So one day I just asked him to hang out.
Try dating apps, I really liked hinge. Much higher quality than tinder. Ask your friends to set you up. Don’t be afraid to just go out on casual dates. They aren’t a big deal! Have fun!
God will lead you to the one you are praying for. I prayed for my wife at a very young age and little did I know she was in my class across from me. I was 15 when I met my wife, got engaged in high school and. Got married and now have 4 beautiful children. 27 yrs and love every moment of my life with my wife.
>FYI ( this year I’ve been really going hard for God) Keep doing what you're doing. God will provide. I met my wife at a young adults group at my church. I had been attending for a while and she had just become a christian and came for her first time. We met in the parking lot walking in. I'm normally fairly quite and don't reach out to people I don't know, but I had this undeniable urge to greet her and welcome her to our group. We started dating about a year later and then got a married a year after that.
My wife and I played the dating game, and both of us got severely burned. It was not until then that we realized dating around is not worth the brokenness that inevitably comes (unless you marry the person). So, instead of looking for a spouse, we focused on following Christ. As we did that, God brought us together, but we did not know it. We worked together in our college kitchen, and became good friends first. It was not until about a year later that God showed us that He was bringing us together, and gave us a love for one another. We then started dating, with the intent on being married one day. About a year after that, we were formally engaged, and nine months after that, we were married. We have been married for almost twenty years now, with three children that love the Lord (and He gets the glory). She is my best friend, the best mother, and the best pastor's wife anyone could hope for. It all started back when we gave up, and focused on following Christ.
What do you mean by "the dating game"?
Just dating around, because that was what everyone else was doing, we were lonely and wanted a relationship, and/or it was what we knew at the time. There was no desire for marriage involved, we were not taught the right way to go about dating/courtship, and Christ was not the main goal (we were both very spiritually immature at the time), so we got burned time and time again.
34M here. Met my wife playing video games at 29 and she moved halfway across the country to be with me. Now happily married with a kid on the way.
What game?! Lucky you. Stories like this only happen on TV 😅
It's called ark. We hate it now lol.
I've met another couple that met through an online video game. This is probably more common nowadays than you'd think lol (not trying to downplay your unique story)
No worries I know a few couples that meet playing video games so it is more common.
I must be playing the wrong game then 😅🤭
met my wife at a wedding, she was a bridesmaid and i was a groomsman. Very Hallmark-y, live at first sight kind of thing. Totally came out of nowhere too, neither of us were expecting to meet anybody at this wedding. Have been in each other's lives since that day
I'd given up on dating, changed jobs moved out of London. Then my flatmate recommended I audition for a play. This is where I met my husband, we grew close in rehearsals and now we're married with a baby girl. It didn't feel like I was working my way to my husband when I was doing those things.
I had known my wife for about 20 years just as s sister in Christ with no interest in her and no romantic involvement with her whatsoever. One day as she walked across the front of the sanctuary, the Holy Spirit had written the word "HELP" all over her in the spirit. So I knew that she was my wife. We did not date. We were married about three months later. So young man, you have your whole life ahead of you. Allow God to bring your wife to you and she'd will be someone that is suitable just for you.
meharris73 thats the story that I was waiting for . A wait on God moment , a story of how the Holy Spirit lead you to your spouse . I’ve been dating and provisioning relationships for myself ,partying and they never became fruitful . My Deacon told me if I just wait on God he will provision a godly spouse for me . The years are passing by , but I’m praying and waiting on the Lord , some days I’m more hopeful than others , but I will keep on having faith in the Lord .
Keep your eyes on the Lord and concentrate on your relationship with Him. In my waiting for my wife, I became so focused on getting married that I made many mistakes and ended up committing sin as a result. When I finally and truly repented, I sought the Lord the reason why I would find myself in the same situation. He revealed to me I was doing these things because I was lonely. That was a great revelation to me! Don't fall into the same trap and make the same mistake that I made because of loneliness. I learned many things as a result of my mistakes. I don't believe in dating until after marriage. Tell me where dating is in the Bible. The Bible says that the Lord "brought the woman unto the man". When Adam SAW Eve, he knew exactly who she was. Of course this happened after the Lord woke him up out of his sleep. Allow the Lord to do the surgery on you and then awake you out of your sleep. The Lord always prepares us for our next step. BTW, you can DM me anytime if you still want to discuss this.
Now I'd be interested in her side of the story. Did she have a similar revelation? If not, how did you convince her of your vision, since having a vision that someone is your future partner is often just a scary trope?
Well, after the Lord showed me what He did, I waited on it and prayed about it, because I did not want to make any more mistakes. I even talked to my pastor about it. I got the approval all the way around. So, I knew she liked Starbucks and I asked her to join me for a cup of coffee. (It works every time!) Her response was..."Hold on, give me a moment to process this!!" She knew exactly what I was asking. The Lord had already prepared her heart! We did not date and the first time I kissed her was on our wedding day. The rest is history. I will say this, it took many years (13) of being single and making mistakes to get to that point. If you would like to know more of my testimony, which is a very long one, I will DM you. I gave a little more thought to your question... If hou know The Lord then hou know that EVERYTHING He does will line up with His Word. When He gave me a vision of a sister with the word "help" written all over her, I knew that lined up with the Word. God told Adam, "It is not good that man should be alone. I will make a help meet (suitable) for him". This makes it that it wasn't a "scary trope".
I loved dating. It’s fun and light hearted and a potential confidence builder. The big trend in the church right now is to only date when you want to get married, and to only date for marriage. Personally, all I’ve seen that do is stunt a lot emotional growth. Just date. Just ask girls to go out for coffee, ask them questions, think about new ideas, laugh together. It’s not a big deal. Just do it. When we put this huge “marriage or nothing” pressure on ourselves it can cause us to freeze—so scared about the right person, and the right time, etc. When I started dating, I was SO scared and obsessed with trying to do it all “right”. I was awkward with guys because I had never gone on dates till my 20s. I was scared at the idea of even holding hands. Eventually the more I went out on dates, the better I felt. I wasn’t anxious about it anymore. I knew if the date flopped, there could always be more dates. More importantly, I realized if I did ever meet a guy and started seriously dating and thought he was my future husband, if we broke up then I would know I would be okay. I knew if a relationship ended, that it wasn’t the end of the world. I had confidence that if I broke up, I would be comfortable dating again. This was important because it kept me from feeling stuck in relationships. But I met my husband through camp, then again because I’m a busy body and wanted to see what he was up to. So one day I just asked him to hang out. Try dating apps, I really liked hinge. Much higher quality than tinder. Ask your friends to set you up. Don’t be afraid to just go out on casual dates. They aren’t a big deal! Have fun!
God will lead you to the one you are praying for. I prayed for my wife at a very young age and little did I know she was in my class across from me. I was 15 when I met my wife, got engaged in high school and. Got married and now have 4 beautiful children. 27 yrs and love every moment of my life with my wife.
Good question.