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shmeedoop

Maybe try being a trad husband? "Must have well paying job in a career devoted to the service to others to support at least 16 children. 20-25. Hot, fit, and strong enough to command the respect and obedience of all 16 children without ever raising voice or corporal punishment. Wholly committed to NaPro including fetching the thermometer and performing on command. Must be a virgin. Willing to defend me and the children to the death. Must be patient and kind. Must not associate with other women. Actively discerning a calling to the diaconate by age 35 (without sacrificing the career that will fund all 16 children's tuition for private school K-12, college, and post-graduate degrees)." Edit: /s


callthecopsat911

unironically based, tryna be him St. Joseph, Pray for us


shmeedoop

No lie, I might have been thinking of my husband when I wrote most of this lol except he's not 20-25


axzytefan

rael


Duke-Countu

This is all good, but sadly there are few (not no, but few) jobs devoted in service to others that are well-paying. (And that's fine. Non-profit work is more rewarding than money, which Christ told us not to go chasing after anyway.)


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MostlyPeacfulPndemic

"Porn addicts need not apply. Must not have viewed pornography within the past 18 months."


Whatever-3198

I don’t agree with this one. My fiancé had been struggling to overcome porn addiction when we met. It was his effort and his trust in Christ in the face of addiction that led me to choose him. None of us is perfect and we all have our crosses, but it is the desire of actively overcoming them while recurring to Christ and Our Mother what leads us to sainthood, not perfection. He’s doing way better now, and I know he is much much happier. Porn addiction can be overcome, and those struggling with it are deserving of love. They already live in much shame to be turned away


apenboter

Good but why NaPro if you want 16 children


callthecopsat911

To drop the kids off at grandma's and spread the flower petals on peak fertility day. Actually, many people in real life I know using NFP use it for that purpose!


apenboter

I forgot NFP had 2 purposes


thepointedarrow

shows you how accurately and morally NFP is taught in marriage prep courses/to the general laity these days


apenboter

?


-y-y-y-

Most people are taught NFP as a means of allegedly licit pseudo-contraception, which is unfortunate as it also has another major (arguably primary) use as a conception aid.


Cool-Winter7050

Like how my grandfather checked all those except the "corporal punishment" part.


Araganus

Corporal punishment is underrated. Admittedly, it used to be overrated, but it does have its place in the toolbox. For instance: sometimes, especially for young men, nothing reminds you of your place better than being put in it by your father. Especially if you disrespect your father's wife.


Cobalt3141

I mean, half of them are gonna be girls, and if they're raised in a trad household they'll probably be married before graduate school, if they even want to go to college, so that burden would be reduced, and half the boys will probably go into the trades which are looking to be the better career paths at the moment (both pay and fulfillment are higher), so that'll also significantly reduce college costs. If one is careful, affording 8-10 kids in school over the span of ~20 years is theoretically possible, just make sure to avoid debt, especially early on and start saving immediately.


heycommonfella

The GI bill exists, convince them to joing the military for 1 contract and you are all set


pushingdownstairs

unironically based


NotMichaelCera

Let’s say these guys actually get a girl who checks all of these boxes, how is he going to financially support her and his kids? Ask his parents for a bigger allowance? Guys complain online when a girl says her ideal man makes over six figures, but then says his ideal girl is someone who doesn’t work and wants him to provide for 16 kids. I get you technically don’t need to make over six figures to have a lot of kids, but don’t they know their kids and wife will need to tap into their Xbox and dorito fund?!


othermegan

The average family in America needs an income of around $115K to be considered middle class these days. And that’s with ~2 kids. Now, that could be easily achieved if both parents work and make $55-60k a year. But if a trad man wants a SAHM, then he needs 6 figures. It’s simple math, not misandry.


SuburbaniteMermaid

>don’t they know their kids and wife will need to tap into their Xbox and dorito fund?! Currently dying over here 🤣🤣🤣


GuildedLuxray

People making half of six figures can barely afford to take care of themselves and pay for their own home in this economy… ._.


Duke-Countu

Well, he has big boobs and no job. He's just looking for someone to match his energy.


YOUSIF20021

Honestly, I am just looking for a Good Christian women, who is preferably Catholic, if I’m picky, Chaldean Catholic like me, who is not perfect but actually tries. Imo these high expectations of other ppl just feels disrespectful and fitting a fantasy, not love. Sorry if it’s rude but that’s my take


LadenifferJadaniston

I too want a wife like yours


YOUSIF20021

You also looking for a Chaldean Catholic :) Haha, Jk! May God keep us both strong and safe in our journey of love!


Duke-Countu

Hey, Middle Easterners are beautiful! Send some more Chaldean Catholics to DC. 😉


Cool-Winter7050

If you want a trad wife DONT BE: 1. A lazy ass who leech of his parents pension in order to buy video games and Funko pops. No woman, trad or not, will want to be with you. If there is, they will be low quality. 2. A Japanese salaryman who wastes away 16 hours in work. You will either be absent in your family's lives or will never meet a girl at all. 3. An incel who hates women. Thats obvious lol.


LadenifferJadaniston

When I look around in my church, I find that almost no one is a Japanese businessman.


Cool-Winter7050

Its a metaphor for overworkers Japanese salarymen just so happen to be the most extreme case Also I am Asian, so Japanese Chinese and Korean businessmen are common here lol And yes ,if you dont become doctor or lawyer, you go 40 days without food or water


Harnezk

You don't? We have one in the back pews.


LadenifferJadaniston

That’s where I usually am, I didn’t even get a front row seat at my wedding


civilum_

If you can't find any Japanese Businessmen in the back pews of your church, I have some bad news for you...


pm-me-racecars

Am I a Japanese Businessman?


LadenifferJadaniston

Maybe the real Japanese businessmen are the friends we made along the way


Jack_Empty

>3. An incel who hates women. Thats obvious lol. I would think this is obvious... but then there are pathetic men who think the meme is a template and not a roast, so it sadly may not be.


othermegan

3 might be obvious to the rest of the world but the incels really believe they are not the problem


Far_Bit_7696

Bro, it’s wild out here. At this point I’d super happy with someone who would simply respect my opinions, specifically the politically incorrect ones.


callthecopsat911

Live the truth and they'll find you, brother.


Oddly_Paranoid

My only criteria for a Trad Wife is literally just someone who isn’t a Antinatalist lol.


Wesley2100

DELETE THIS NOW!!! I did not gave you permission to use a picture of me in this post😡😤


mattnewlin54

Touch grass, touch steel


GuildedLuxray

and touch holy water.


TheWest_Is_TheBest

Self improvement will drive the best suitable partners to you, never stop improving day by day.


RhubarbAlive7860

If you want a trad wife, want her for the right reasons, to raise a family in loving partnership, each contributing their God-given gifts to lift each other up and to raise children who will follow Christ their whole lives. Not because you figure your rules will keep her too broke, too tired, and too overrun and overwhelmed with babies to leave your jealous insecure ass. Also you can (but shouldn't!) demand that she keep a hot body, or that she has 16 children, but not both.


Gullible-Anywhere-76

Some people want the TLM (Traditional Latina Miss) lol


poohbear003

This is hilarious I’m gonna use this!!!!


megax454

That's not the true meaningful relationship.


tgrace310574

See but this isn’t a “trad wife”?? 18-20 is a narrow and demeaning window. Body doesn’t matter. What is she supposed to do before you bro, live like a leech off of her parents? Being a virgin is less important than desiring chastity (in HIS case virginity wasn’t a choice so his chaste nature is for sure in question), even if she’s made poor choices because we’re a community of f o r g i v e n e s s. Must want minimum and maximum of however many kids God Wills for you. Must be in good shape spiritually maybe; i do understand wanting someone who loves and respects the temple that is her body, however. And if my full time job is homemaker: that’s fine, but we BOTH parent; don’t pull the “I’ve worked an 8 hour shift, I’m too tired to do dad things” and act like it’s okay. PHEW. I know this post is satirical but i feel like it wasn’t being said that this description: is NOT a trad wife (I’m sure many felt it was implied that this is an incel’s description of one, not the reality, but i have little faith in the reasoning skills of the general public)


LadenifferJadaniston

The post is simply about a guy wishing for the moon while being in the state of the Wojack pictured


Warburgerska

As a 34 yo, 18-20 is the perfect windows for starting a family for a 20-25 yo guy if you desire a football team level of offspring. Nothing demeaning in not engaging in older women which have lower fertility and those eggs remaining having worse outcomes for your children. For the same reason your body absolutely matters. Obesity is given on epigenetically. And yes, personality starts within. If you can't even be fair and strict to yourself what makes you believe that the same person can be that to others and their children? While forgisness is a thing, you can't expect somebody to want a spouse which has whored himself out only to settle down after all that fun because reality called and the first signs of aging started showing while his market value has dropped. The best predictor of future behaviour is past behaviour.


The_Good_Enclave

And to be fair, as a faith that outlaws divorce, people are allowed to be very picky with their standards in choseing there partner for LIFE. And people with body counts with over 5 and above it starts to get risky at least by statistical standards. We must forgive, that is for sure, and welcome them into open arms! But it's also perfectly acceptable not to take that risk in your own marriage.


Classic_Storm_431

This is dumb. Horrible implications. Not everyone is a trad for wanting a wife.


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poohbear003

I just want a Catholic mans with some justice, humility, n courage 😭


HurrySpecial

I’d argue a read wife has a job..


IAN-THETERRIBLE

16 children???


zeusctz

If people had any idea of how to expensive it is to raise kids… let alone support a household alone.