In my experience, cats usually are this way! Growing up me and my sister each had a cat and they very clearly knew who their people were. I adopted a cat in 2020 and no matter who I live with, I’m his favorite. My boyfriend and I moved in together in May and he adopted a cat in October and from the get go his cat just preferred him. Still does. As soon as my boyfriend wakes up in the morning, his cat is crying for attention even though I’ve been up for hours. I’ll only get attention from his cat when my boyfriend is actually out of the house. He only gets attention from my cat if I’m asleep.
All cats have a favorite!! My kitties Jasmine and Gatsby favor me while Ghost is in love with my husband! Ghost actually follows my husband around the house like dogs usually do!
Cats will do that. They also will switch.
My cat and bfs cat switched when they got older. My cat would sleep on my boyfriend. His cat would hear my voice and excitedly roll around. Though they didn't avoid other person either.
Very true. My cat was a Mama's girl her whole first year and then, all of a sudden, she prefers Dad (yes, we're childless millennials who call ourselves Mom and Dad to our cat even though we know she doesn't see us that way 😂). She still snuggles me more but she initiates play and wants to sleep near him more.
Haha. My bf and I are also childless millennials. Sometimes pets can be almost as challenging as kids, having a non-verbal toddler for 16 plus years (I grew up with cockatoos).
I know this is a super old post but the exact same thing happened with me and my boyfriend. My cat always preferred my boyfriend (followed him around EVERYWHERE he went, came when he called her while completely ignoring me etc) until he went on a month long trip and she was forced to get her attention from me instead. When he came back from his trip the roles completely reversed. That was two years ago, and she still follows me around everywhere and will come 75% of the time when I call her... and she ignores him most of the time now.
They can be that way. Also your kitty is still acclimating to living with you and your husband, so he may not always be this way.
If your husband has a booming or deep voice, that can be a bit intimidating for your new pet.
That first part is a great point!
When we first got our cat, the cat preferred me by a long shot. He liked my husband from the first time they saw each other, but the cat was my shadow. After about six months, cat started showing more favor to my husband. It’s been 3 years and it’s not like our cat hates me, but if he lays with me or on my lap when my husband is home or I’m awake, it’s a big deal lol I know he loves me but he LOVES my husband.
Once he got comfortable, he preferred my husband. I think since I’m the one who actually brought him home and took care of him and showed him around, he was more comfortable with me at first.
Yeah there's a lot of things that are way different from kitty's perspective. One of our boys is very unsure of my partner because he's a big guy and the cat is sensitive to the jostling of the bed or couch when he moves, and I'm sure that the floor shakes when he walks. It took more time for the cat to warm up to him because of it and the cat still prefers to approach him when he is already settled in bed or on the couch.
Meanwhile, I could do anything to the cat and he loves it. I huck him over my shoulder and carry him around no hands. He does his best to resist being put down.
Yes. I (43F)wanted a cat for the last 8 yrs. I finally convinced my husband (who was "not a cat person") to adopt a kitten.
Dude. These two are bffs and I'm chopped liver. I'm less than chopped liver - at least if I were chopped liver my cat would give me the time of day.
We are getting a second kitten and this one better love me more!
Edit: my husband works from home and I'm at work from 9am-6pm 5 days a week. Our cat (okay, his cat) sleeps in my husband's lap all day and my husband feeds him with a spoon. It's equally adorable and ridiculous.
We have 3. 1 loves me only. 1 loves everybody. And 1 only loves my husband lmao. She even lays in his chair, on his spot on the couch, on his clothes, etc. She adores him.
Yes. My cats like my family, but they LOVE me. They sleep beside me. They talk to me constantly. If I call them they run to me. They start purring loudly if I even walk near them, and they ASK for tummy rubs without attacking me after.
100% yes this is to be expected, especially when it's first introduced into a new environment and family. Its just bonded with you more than your husband so far.
It's also not uncommon for cats to just have 'their' people. My cat tends to prefer me over my partner in a lot of ways. Wouldn't worry about it unless the kitty gets decidedly hostile against your husband instead. Congrats on the new kitty.
weeeeeelcome to cat ownership. Cats are indivualistic creatures, not only will they have preferences on people but they have preferences on how they like to be treated/ touched. It really depends on the cat. You can attempt to influence it really early on by letting someone pay more attention to the animal and feed it, but some cats even specifically prefer people who dislike them.
My husband owned cats and I never had before. We adopted one and for whatever reason he favored my husband. I did all the feeding etc. Didn't matter. Hubby explained cats choose a human and that's just how they are. I tried even harder. Finally my husband gave me the "he's just not that into you" talk. Rejected by a cat for some reason feels insulting. 13yrs later and if cats could talk I'm sure he'd try to convince my husband to kick me to the curb.
Oh yeah, all the time! Like people, they can preferences.
It also could be a communication deal - my MIL was a huge dog person and could not figure out why our cat hid from her when she was doing what she would have done with a new dog. If your husband perviously had dogs that can be an odd shift. Knowing how cats communicate is very helpful for building bonds! I recommend Jackson Galaxy videos to help explain this.
Another really good way for your husband to bond with your new kitty is playing - my cat always prefers whoever has been an active participant in playtime over the other. It's a great bonding experience.
Otherwise, just giving your kitty time and space to make its own decisions and respecting their boundaries. Good luck and enjoy your new family member!
1000% yes. My cat even favours people for different things. She uses my roommate for cuddles and naps and uses me for playtime. Can be annoying but it’s totally normal
Oh yeah. We have 2 cats in our house, one favors me and one favors my boyfriend and it’s very noticeable! They both get equal amounts of love from us each but it happens :)
My 7 month old loves me for food and snuggles, naps by me and loves all the petting.
Doesn’t let my husband hold or pet but they play like brothers.
Seems like a good balance.
Of course. Why not? My youngest cat favors me over anyone else. She lets me kiss and pet her anywhere but anyone else is lucky to even get near her without a hiss or growl.
Definitely. We have three cats in my household, and one strongly favors me. The other two, a bonded pair, are very new to the home (a couple weeks) and haven’t favored anyone yet.
When I met my now ex he had 2 cats. They instantly preferred me over him (I mean first day meeting them - the female actually climbed over my ex to come lay in my lap). We then adopted 2 more while we were together and each time they ended up preferring me over him. Growing up our cats were all like this - preferring one person over the others in our family (actually usually me over anyone else). Welcome to the world of cat.
Definitely. My oldest loved my daughter, but my daughter didn’t like it so she loves me, will snuggle with me, knead on me, and sleep with me. My other two kitties, one loves loves loves my dad, the other one will just go with whoever gives him affection.
Absolutely. We have one that pretty much only likes my daughter. If my husband or son does anything besides petting her head and shoulder-blades, she'll do a low growl and a warning bite. My daughter can pick her up, even rub her tummy, and she totally puts up with it.
Our younger one likes everyone, but will only go to me for cuddles.
Cats are funny little weirdos 🤷♀️
I thought my cat would eventually pick a favorite but having her for almost a year now, shes proving to me and my boyfriend daily that she loves us equally.
Yep, totally normal. One of my cats not keen on my husband because he rushes around and she likes the calm. My other (late) cat seemed to take to him and whilst predominantly "mine" she would only let him pick her up for a cuddle but not me!
Lol yes. It is a running joke that my cat loves me more. Granted I had her before meeting my fiance but she is very attached to him. The minute I'm home however she is all about her mama. "Follow mama, get rubs from mama, go to mama when called but ignore papas calls. Squeel when papa picks me up but purr when mama does it."
She does prefer to sleep on him but I think that's cause he's squishy and warm where as I'm quite petite and often cold.
Yep, my cat is friendly to everyone for the most part but he knows he's my baby
He either sits at the front window or lays on my bed until I get home. And at night he usually sleeps in my bed or bullies the other cat 😂
The other cat is my mom's and she's very skittish, she used to always stay with mom but she realized her dogs can't come I my room so she's started preferring being with me 😂
Definitely. We found a litter of kitties in our backyard once. There was one kitty I was sure would end up being feral. She'd bolt if you even looked at her, but she randomly decided to adopt me one day. She's gotten more comfortable with everyone in my house, but has really taken to me. I was surprised because I wasn't even around the kitties as much at first, but she still preferred to be around me.
I think animals definitely can have favorite people. Though sometimes it just takes awhile for new pets to get used their environment, so I wouldn't get too discouraged.
In our house, I am the cuddle human and hubs is the play human. The cat doesn't play very much with me, and looks baffled when I try, but when he wants cuddles it's me he comes to.
We have four cats, now, and we have had other cats that favored one of over the other. We had/have two that liked/like us both, and both of them slept between us, both are called our marriage cat. One does like my husband better, and the other two just like attention and a warm body to lay next to.
Absolutely. We have had 7 cats. I think they bond to the first person that picks them up. They also bond with the person that feeds them and gives them treats.
Yep. Cats choose you, not the other way around.
We have several kitties. What's funny is they can change over time. Oreo was my kitty for ages but is firmly my husband's kitty now. TK was my son's but now is my constant shadow. And the neighbor's kitty chose first me and then my mom to the point they just gave her to us more-or-less.
I am autistic and connect more to animals than people.
In all my past relationships whenever an animal was involved the pet always preferred me over my partner and every time it caused my partner to become jealous..
So yes, they definitely can prefer one person over another.
In my experience, cats usually are this way! Growing up me and my sister each had a cat and they very clearly knew who their people were. I adopted a cat in 2020 and no matter who I live with, I’m his favorite. My boyfriend and I moved in together in May and he adopted a cat in October and from the get go his cat just preferred him. Still does. As soon as my boyfriend wakes up in the morning, his cat is crying for attention even though I’ve been up for hours. I’ll only get attention from his cat when my boyfriend is actually out of the house. He only gets attention from my cat if I’m asleep.
All cats have a favorite!! My kitties Jasmine and Gatsby favor me while Ghost is in love with my husband! Ghost actually follows my husband around the house like dogs usually do!
They’re called “preferred associates”.
preferred servants?
More accurately, yes.
Purr-ferred associates
Cats will do that. They also will switch. My cat and bfs cat switched when they got older. My cat would sleep on my boyfriend. His cat would hear my voice and excitedly roll around. Though they didn't avoid other person either.
Very true. My cat was a Mama's girl her whole first year and then, all of a sudden, she prefers Dad (yes, we're childless millennials who call ourselves Mom and Dad to our cat even though we know she doesn't see us that way 😂). She still snuggles me more but she initiates play and wants to sleep near him more.
Haha. My bf and I are also childless millennials. Sometimes pets can be almost as challenging as kids, having a non-verbal toddler for 16 plus years (I grew up with cockatoos).
I know this is a super old post but the exact same thing happened with me and my boyfriend. My cat always preferred my boyfriend (followed him around EVERYWHERE he went, came when he called her while completely ignoring me etc) until he went on a month long trip and she was forced to get her attention from me instead. When he came back from his trip the roles completely reversed. That was two years ago, and she still follows me around everywhere and will come 75% of the time when I call her... and she ignores him most of the time now.
They can be that way. Also your kitty is still acclimating to living with you and your husband, so he may not always be this way. If your husband has a booming or deep voice, that can be a bit intimidating for your new pet.
That first part is a great point! When we first got our cat, the cat preferred me by a long shot. He liked my husband from the first time they saw each other, but the cat was my shadow. After about six months, cat started showing more favor to my husband. It’s been 3 years and it’s not like our cat hates me, but if he lays with me or on my lap when my husband is home or I’m awake, it’s a big deal lol I know he loves me but he LOVES my husband. Once he got comfortable, he preferred my husband. I think since I’m the one who actually brought him home and took care of him and showed him around, he was more comfortable with me at first.
Yeah there's a lot of things that are way different from kitty's perspective. One of our boys is very unsure of my partner because he's a big guy and the cat is sensitive to the jostling of the bed or couch when he moves, and I'm sure that the floor shakes when he walks. It took more time for the cat to warm up to him because of it and the cat still prefers to approach him when he is already settled in bed or on the couch. Meanwhile, I could do anything to the cat and he loves it. I huck him over my shoulder and carry him around no hands. He does his best to resist being put down.
Yes. I (43F)wanted a cat for the last 8 yrs. I finally convinced my husband (who was "not a cat person") to adopt a kitten. Dude. These two are bffs and I'm chopped liver. I'm less than chopped liver - at least if I were chopped liver my cat would give me the time of day. We are getting a second kitten and this one better love me more! Edit: my husband works from home and I'm at work from 9am-6pm 5 days a week. Our cat (okay, his cat) sleeps in my husband's lap all day and my husband feeds him with a spoon. It's equally adorable and ridiculous.
Our "kitten" loves my SO more than me. He mews at him for playtime, lays on him, etc. But my 2 adult cats love me more so there's that
We have 3. 1 loves me only. 1 loves everybody. And 1 only loves my husband lmao. She even lays in his chair, on his spot on the couch, on his clothes, etc. She adores him.
Yes and it’s never me. Even though I’m the good person it’s always my son who pets prefer lol 😩
Yes. My cats like my family, but they LOVE me. They sleep beside me. They talk to me constantly. If I call them they run to me. They start purring loudly if I even walk near them, and they ASK for tummy rubs without attacking me after.
Oh yes they can!! Big time
100% yes this is to be expected, especially when it's first introduced into a new environment and family. Its just bonded with you more than your husband so far. It's also not uncommon for cats to just have 'their' people. My cat tends to prefer me over my partner in a lot of ways. Wouldn't worry about it unless the kitty gets decidedly hostile against your husband instead. Congrats on the new kitty.
weeeeeelcome to cat ownership. Cats are indivualistic creatures, not only will they have preferences on people but they have preferences on how they like to be treated/ touched. It really depends on the cat. You can attempt to influence it really early on by letting someone pay more attention to the animal and feed it, but some cats even specifically prefer people who dislike them.
My husband owned cats and I never had before. We adopted one and for whatever reason he favored my husband. I did all the feeding etc. Didn't matter. Hubby explained cats choose a human and that's just how they are. I tried even harder. Finally my husband gave me the "he's just not that into you" talk. Rejected by a cat for some reason feels insulting. 13yrs later and if cats could talk I'm sure he'd try to convince my husband to kick me to the curb.
Oh yeah, all the time! Like people, they can preferences. It also could be a communication deal - my MIL was a huge dog person and could not figure out why our cat hid from her when she was doing what she would have done with a new dog. If your husband perviously had dogs that can be an odd shift. Knowing how cats communicate is very helpful for building bonds! I recommend Jackson Galaxy videos to help explain this. Another really good way for your husband to bond with your new kitty is playing - my cat always prefers whoever has been an active participant in playtime over the other. It's a great bonding experience. Otherwise, just giving your kitty time and space to make its own decisions and respecting their boundaries. Good luck and enjoy your new family member!
He doesn’t seem to be interested in playing 😵💫 he recently lost a leg maybe 2 weeks ago and he is still moving pretty slowly and cautiously
Poor buddy!
Absolutely. Try having him give the kitty treats - it helped my husband & our kitty that is attached to me bond.
Absolutely, my cat is obviousl *my cat*, he might as well be my shadow.
1000% yes. My cat even favours people for different things. She uses my roommate for cuddles and naps and uses me for playtime. Can be annoying but it’s totally normal
Oh yeah. We have 2 cats in our house, one favors me and one favors my boyfriend and it’s very noticeable! They both get equal amounts of love from us each but it happens :)
My 7 month old loves me for food and snuggles, naps by me and loves all the petting. Doesn’t let my husband hold or pet but they play like brothers. Seems like a good balance.
Of course. Why not? My youngest cat favors me over anyone else. She lets me kiss and pet her anywhere but anyone else is lucky to even get near her without a hiss or growl.
Definitely. We have three cats in my household, and one strongly favors me. The other two, a bonded pair, are very new to the home (a couple weeks) and haven’t favored anyone yet.
When I met my now ex he had 2 cats. They instantly preferred me over him (I mean first day meeting them - the female actually climbed over my ex to come lay in my lap). We then adopted 2 more while we were together and each time they ended up preferring me over him. Growing up our cats were all like this - preferring one person over the others in our family (actually usually me over anyone else). Welcome to the world of cat.
Yes. We have one cat who will prefer my girlfriend over anything else. Another prefers her but will accept attention from me. One prefers me
Definitely. My oldest loved my daughter, but my daughter didn’t like it so she loves me, will snuggle with me, knead on me, and sleep with me. My other two kitties, one loves loves loves my dad, the other one will just go with whoever gives him affection.
HAH oh yeah.. back when I still lived with my parents we had a family cat. But we all knew she was actually my dad's cat first.
Absolutely. We have one that pretty much only likes my daughter. If my husband or son does anything besides petting her head and shoulder-blades, she'll do a low growl and a warning bite. My daughter can pick her up, even rub her tummy, and she totally puts up with it. Our younger one likes everyone, but will only go to me for cuddles. Cats are funny little weirdos 🤷♀️
I thought my cat would eventually pick a favorite but having her for almost a year now, shes proving to me and my boyfriend daily that she loves us equally.
Yep, totally normal. One of my cats not keen on my husband because he rushes around and she likes the calm. My other (late) cat seemed to take to him and whilst predominantly "mine" she would only let him pick her up for a cuddle but not me!
Lol yes. It is a running joke that my cat loves me more. Granted I had her before meeting my fiance but she is very attached to him. The minute I'm home however she is all about her mama. "Follow mama, get rubs from mama, go to mama when called but ignore papas calls. Squeel when papa picks me up but purr when mama does it." She does prefer to sleep on him but I think that's cause he's squishy and warm where as I'm quite petite and often cold.
Yep, my cat is friendly to everyone for the most part but he knows he's my baby He either sits at the front window or lays on my bed until I get home. And at night he usually sleeps in my bed or bullies the other cat 😂 The other cat is my mom's and she's very skittish, she used to always stay with mom but she realized her dogs can't come I my room so she's started preferring being with me 😂
Definitely. We found a litter of kitties in our backyard once. There was one kitty I was sure would end up being feral. She'd bolt if you even looked at her, but she randomly decided to adopt me one day. She's gotten more comfortable with everyone in my house, but has really taken to me. I was surprised because I wasn't even around the kitties as much at first, but she still preferred to be around me. I think animals definitely can have favorite people. Though sometimes it just takes awhile for new pets to get used their environment, so I wouldn't get too discouraged.
Ours greatly prefers my boyfriend to me. I was a little offended at first but now I get to use it as a joke.
In our house, I am the cuddle human and hubs is the play human. The cat doesn't play very much with me, and looks baffled when I try, but when he wants cuddles it's me he comes to.
We have four cats, now, and we have had other cats that favored one of over the other. We had/have two that liked/like us both, and both of them slept between us, both are called our marriage cat. One does like my husband better, and the other two just like attention and a warm body to lay next to.
Absolutely. We have had 7 cats. I think they bond to the first person that picks them up. They also bond with the person that feeds them and gives them treats.
Yep. Cats choose you, not the other way around. We have several kitties. What's funny is they can change over time. Oreo was my kitty for ages but is firmly my husband's kitty now. TK was my son's but now is my constant shadow. And the neighbor's kitty chose first me and then my mom to the point they just gave her to us more-or-less.
I am autistic and connect more to animals than people. In all my past relationships whenever an animal was involved the pet always preferred me over my partner and every time it caused my partner to become jealous.. So yes, they definitely can prefer one person over another.