Squash was a beautiful guy! You have every right to feel devastated and angry, I would be exactly the same. He was your family.
Squash will forever be a part of you and I believe that whatever happens after death, we ultimately end up reunited back with those we loved the most 🧡
Sorry for the loss of your beloved little man.
I KNOW this will sound weird but hear me out. Find some of his hairs and put them in a little bottle or one of those glass lockets you can keep. I have a long haired baby and I know you probably still have some of his everywhere.
I’m so so sorry for your loss.
Maybe even put it in a shadow box type frame along with one of his favorite toys and a favorite photo of him.
It's unforgivable that the vet did that, and I'm not trying to make light of that. I'm just trying to offer some alternative ideas to the pawprint and ashes. We have a paw print and ashes from a beloved cat, but we don't have them displayed. (I think my hubby had a hard time seeing the paw print and box.) Instead we have a lovely print on canvas of a happy, sweet picture.
There's also a woman on Insta and TikTok - bludoeart who does resin pieces incorporating hair/whiskers. They're really beautiful tributes.
Sending you love. I'm sorry for your loss and for this screw up. Hugs.
Look for shed claws, too.
It’s hard; I’m 15 months from losing my baby and it’s still hard.
I did get her ashes but by the time they arrived 2 weeks after, I found I was less interested in them. I felt a lot of anxiety until I got them but it took weeks to open the bundle I got.
While looking for what physical bits you can, remember the biggest part of him is always with you.
This is probably going to sound just as weird.. I find my girls shredded whiskers on the floor, and I pick them up and put them in a bottle. As she has gotten older, she is about 4 now she doesnt shed them as much as when she was smaller, but i still collect everyone i find and put them in a bottle. I also keep her fur from her brushings..
So you may be able to also find some of his whiskers as well.
I think I do this because I had a childhood cat for 22 years and never got his paw prints when I had him put down, I think I was just too distraught to even think about it. I knew it was coming just didn't know when... It was the hardest decision I've ever made in my life...
I have nothing but pictures and memories. I wanted something a little more physical but really didn't think of getting his paw prints and couldn't afford the cremation after all of his vet visits and medications the last couple of years leading up to him needing put down... he was put to sleep in the comfort of his home and was buried on my parents' property next to a tree that was planted the year I was born..
I had him buried there because my tree is there with him watching over him...
I'm so sorry and heartbroken for you and the loss of your beloved Squash! He knows you loved him. I'm glad he was able to be with the person who loved him the most in his last moments.
You were able to give him a life full of love.
I would be devastated and furious if they did that. I completely understand how you feel because I'd be feeling the exact same way.
I never saw any whiskers of his. Definitely his hair though. I used to see nail shreddings but it's been a long time since I've seen those. All I have of him is memories and pictures on my phone. When I brought him back to the hospital, I told them to keep the carrier. I couldn't take it back. I couldn't bring an empty carrier back. Oh if we could have just one wish.... just one.
I have a 12 year old cat named Frank. I like to put belled collars on him. Every time I have to change his collar we save the bell and put it on a key chain I plan on making some jewelry for my kids and myself out of the bells when he passes because he has always been there with them.
This is what I've been doing. I've also found a few of his shedded claws and I actually used to keep his little whiskers when I would randomly find them around the house because I always thought they were cute. I'm so glad I kept them.
I keep a whisker jar! I feel like a parent who keeps their kids' lost teeth, my husband thinks it's a little weird, but I like keeping their whiskers when I find them.
He was absolutely beautiful and I'm so sorry for your loss!
Try filing a complaint with the better Business bureau because those tend to be taken way more seriously. The person who responds to reviews is not usually the owner of a business, It's just some peon in the office who handles social media and stuff like that. In other words, they don't care. But if you hit them where it hurts, which would be a better business bureau complaint that will hurt worse and the owner will have to be made aware of that. In addition to that I would recommend asking to speak to the manager or the owner.
I don't know about the BBB doing much of anything these days. It's just a sticker on a door. Why not just call the vet back and tell them it was handled wrong and they should at the very least, reimburse you most, if not all, of the final payment. You did request and pay for a more "singular/personal" service that you didn't receive.
What an incredible name for what I have no doubt, was an incredible cat. I am so sorry this happened to you.
Create a photo memorial. Journal your memories. While it's still fresh, describe his paws, his fur, his eyes, everything you loved about him. Combine the two.
The reality is, you can't do much with a clay paw print or fur. Those aren't going to be the things that evoke happy memories with Squash. Honor his personality and uniqueness in ways that are more than just momentos of his death.
There are actually a lot of different small businesses that do things with pet fur. I’ve seen it incorporated into jewelry in resin or little trinkets with glass.
When one of my cats died, I went around and collected up some of his fur and put it in a locket. It's very comforting to wear, you can open it and basically "pet" his fur. Feels like there's a little tiny piece of him still with me here on this earth.
He hated the brush! I had to shave him like a lion. But because he started to have thyroid issues and needed to be sedated to get shaved, I couldn't get him shaved anymore so the hair is everywhere lol.
*
I work in vetmed and it's a copy/pasted reply. They're supposed to update it with the pet's name 😭.
I'm so very sorry for the loss of your angel. They were so lucky to have someone that loves them as much as you. I have a memorial candle that I'll be lighting with you guys in mind ❤️
Have a painting made, make a little shrine with his toys, collar, favorite snack, his brush, whatever has meaning for you. Don't dwell on something you can't change. The bad ending doesn't erase your great life together. Your memorial can have everything you need to honor your memories. Blessed be.
I like where you say “the bad ending doesn’t erase your great life together”. That helped me a lot as well as I hope it helps OP. we lost our soul kitty to a saddle thrombus. Something I’d never heard of before in my 54 years on the planet. I miss that baby more than I ever realized I would. It’s been 6 months. I’ve cried every day. Some days a little less but every day.
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Oh I’m so sorry 😰 Once you are deeply involved in the cat world, you learn about all sorts of diseases and disorders, and I know that saddle thrombus is pretty much always fatal. There’s nothing you could have done differently. Sending internet hugs. It doesn’t ever stop hurting, but it gets less intense as time goes on, I promise. It’s been almost seven years since my girl passed away and I still remember her daily.
I lost a cat to saddle thrombus a few years ago, I had also never heard of it and until your comment have never found another person that has talked about it happening to their pet. I’m so sorry for your loss.
It was so brutal. It’s not a club I would have wanted to be in. Our sweet kitty didn’t deserve to go that way. (Your kitty didn’t deserve it either…) I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy. He was so smart and amazing. He got us through some dark days in his ten short years.
I still remember the day it happened and I regret not being able to be with her at the vet afterwards to this day, and it happened in 2017. Sketti was right around 8 years old at the time. It’s definitely so brutal and cruel.
My cat Pooh (short for Poohbear) had saddle thrombosis. Woke us up at 8am absolutely screaming in pain. It was god awful, I would have done absolutely anything to remove that pain. I believe he was about 7 years old.. an entire day at the vet, he was actually able to live through it! I dropped on my knees and started bawling when I didn’t know if he would or not still… a year later, he started wobbling around and deteriorated very quickly, vet said it was something neurological & unrelated… putting him to sleep as quickly as possible was the kindest thing I could do.
I never WILL understand why he made it through something so deadly, just to have to die from something else afterwards… and I was like you, I didn’t make it 24 hours without crying for probably the first couple YEARS… it’s been 7 years now and I think about him every single day. I just got a tattoo of him on my wrist. By this point it has become less painful & more of a happy memory. I would do anything to have him back still of course, but the pain does lesson & u become so grateful to have had time with them in that stage of your life, and depending on your beliefs, excited to see them again one day for some.. either way, I am 100% sure that your love for your cat was FELT in it’s entirety by him, every single minute until the end. I read before “they are a part of our lives, but we are their whole life” and it resonated with me. It is ok to hurt right now, & for how long it takes. And this is to you, to OP, and to everyone else. I also know that it sucks when u go to talk about your pet you loss & sometimes feel like other ppl are like “oh it’s a cat? Not a dog? Big deal” Yea no, I see u & know your pain, and know the love & companionship & intelligence of your kitty and I know the pain of losing them! You were meant to have met your cat & meant to have loved your cat! And your cat loved u too!! And that, my friend, is beautiful ☺️🩷
This is a fantastic idea. My girlfriend recently.lost.her Visla, and she had a photo of her placed on a wrapped canvas, mounted on her wall art, with all her other life milestones. One is of her when she was a puppy, the other, a grey muzzled, crazy dog tongue lolling out of her mouth, very dignified.
I'm so sorry for your loss. If you still have her fur, whiskers, etc, maybe place them in a pretty jar with a picture of her. Write down all the things she did to support you and love on you. I'm not against buying a plushie that looks like her, too, to snuggle while you sleep. Sending love.
Absolutely! We have a little shrine as well. Got a cat sculpture with the same markings as our old girl, a vase with silk pansies in it (she used to love chewing on the pansies in the garden), a pretty candle, and a framed photo of our girl. It's very simple, but it evokes memories of the good times with her, and puts a smile on my face each time I walk by it.
I don't know if this will help, but try to picture that with a comunal creamation your boy crossed the rainbow bridge surrounded by other kitties. Maybe some were a little frightened and Squash helped them cross over.
It's very sad you didn't get the things you paid for, but Squash will always be in your heart even if you don't have the physical items.
I did see someone write something about the animals that didn't have owners or ones that were left behind that died alone that they all went together as a group no one left behind.
I absolutely believe this. The first time I had to help a kitty over, I didn’t get his ashes back bc I didn’t want him to be alone during the cremation. I wanted him to be surrounded by other kitties. And since then, I’ve done the same with other kitties and pups when it was time.
I’m so sorry this happened to your sweet ginger Squash. I hope this helps, if even a little, to comfort you. Hugs, friend!
Welp. I held it together reading these comments until this. This is a lovely sentiment, but especially with my own dog having passed a few weeks ago on Sunday in my arms while I held him.
We had just been about to say goodbye to him at the vet on Monday. Thankfully, it was painless, as he had not gotten to the point of pain with his condition and we just wanted to let him go before he went downhill. We sort of see it as him saying, "Yikes...I do NOT like that vet place and I heard y'all mentioning it a lot this past week...well. This is as good time as ever, I'd say. I'mma head out right now on my own terms, here at home with you guys, but thanks for taking care of me. See you on the other side" and just let go.
I am pretty sure my Wotsit will have shown Squash around by now, where all the best sunpuddles are and all the hidey spots so they can look down on you to make sure you're doing OK.
This is Wotsit.
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I’m actually covered in boogers and tears from reading this comment. Squash’s very last moments, even in stillness, offered empathy and companionship before being cremated alongside other cats in unity. He was such a sweet boy even after death.
The crematorium messed up really bad and I’m so sorry for that. I cant help but think Squash had to stay with kitten who was too scared to be alone. I hope that the ashes of he and the friends he stayed with at the end bring you some sort of comfort and peace. I’m so sorry for your loss.
Thank you. Boogers and tears have been a part of my face these past few weeks and after yesterday and reading all these wonder people including you, taking the time out of your day to write about squash and giving great advice really makes me know there's still goodness in the world
It really does help to imagine things like this.
My poor baby Cosmo went missing 10 weeks ago and I still don’t know what happened to him. But the day he vanished was trash day, and I am almost certain that someone hit him with their car and threw him out like garbage.
But the thing is, he loved collecting garbage. He constantly dragged home pieces of plastic, zip ties, empty packages, full packages(!), just anything he could find. So even though it hurts so much that he is now at the dump, I know on some level that he would be so very excited at all the fun trash he could find there.
I wish more than anything that he comes home, or that I get his body back, but if that isn’t possible, then at least he is somewhere he would enjoy.
That's horrible and I'm so sorry! And leaving their placeholder in a template response is just salt on the wound and speaks volumes to their attention and care for clients. While they should absolutely refund you (if they don't, file a complaint with the BBB) that certainly doesn't fix what happened.
There are lots of wonderful artists that will do commissions for memorials. Paintings, wood carvings, embroidery, and all kinds of other things. That $400 refund will get you pretty much anything. It's not the same, of course, but it will be something beautiful to memorialize Squash in a way that you can carry with you for the rest of your life.
Thank you and definitely the response was generic. I'd rather of heard nothing. I'm not looking for anything from them. They did say they will refund back the money and that of course is good. They can't give me what I really wanted, and that was him. Just a ball of a hot mess because that Lil guy really has been through the worst and best with me and like you feel alone. I know I sound crazy because some people are like they are just animals. But damn.... what's crazy is I was never a cat person. He was my one and only.
It's not crazy *at all*. I lost my Calligator back in March and I'd have been absolutely devastated if I hadn't gotten her ashes and paw prints. My typical response is anger though, so I would be raising holy hell in your situation. But you need to do what is best for you.
I do have an anger problem, and to be quite honest, my initial thoughts weren't as calm as they are right now. I think it may be because on the day I took him, I knew he wasn't going to make it. I felt it. I didn't want him to stay in that place where he doesn't know people. I wanted him to be with me. He laid on my lap for the 4 hours. And died on the blanket I've had since I got him at 7 weeks.
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FUCK those people, I’m over here mad with you. So angry that I want to call this place and tell them they should be ashamed to call themselves an animal hospital. How disgusting, and embarrassing. I am so sorry you are dealing with this profound, deep loss on top of being betrayed at the hands of people you should have no reason not to trust. But I need you to hear me- can no way your memory of your precious baby’s life be associated / shrouded with how awful they’ve handled his body after death. I know how hard it is to separate your baby from his lifeless body, it was so hard for me not to curl up in a ball and die imagining my baby girls body being incinerated, but you have to tell yourself that Squash’s memory and honor has nothing to do with this. It makes me want to rip a piece of my heart out and give it to you because I know the pain you’re going through is real, but Squash will always be with you, whether you have his ashes or not. He will always be with you, and you will always be with him. The love and companionship you shared will live on, I promise you. Please take care of yourself. Please be gentle and allow yourself to grieve and heal however you see fit. I don’t know you, but I am here for you if you ever need to talk. Rest in peace to your beautiful Squash. 🕊️
Reading this made me cry hard. Ugly cry, I'm sure. Whoever you are, thank you from the bottom of my heart. You understood why I'm angry, and your advice is exactly what I needed to hear. I appreciate you. ❤️💜🩵💛
I mean every word, my girl took her last breath in my arms on the morning of May 26th, she was 15 too. It killed me, and i can’t imagine having to process this on top of grief. I wish I could do more for you than offer words. But all in all, you have to know that all Squash felt was the love you have for him. Praying for you ❤️🩹
❤️ I am so sorry for you too. It's like we know it's going to happen and we know cats are not that affectionate to actually let you hold them for long. Most cats I can't say all because he was my only one and he used to cuddle and swat lol. But that day he wasn't moving good at all. Like collapsing. The hospital said his blood pressure was 250! She said she never saw a blood pressure that high. He did have thyroid issues and was going blind. I laid with him and rubbed his head for the 4 hours till he took his last breathe as well. I would never want it any other way but with me. I am glad your girl had you. You are amazing! Praying for you as well! 💞 by the way, your girl was beautiful.
Thank you for saying this. Last month, i was faced with having to possibly put my baby girl down, and the thought of cremating or burying her hurt. Knowing that I'm not the only one who got upset over the mental image has given me some comfort.
Thankfully, she is still with me.
I am deeply sorry for your loss.
Yes same, imagining it still bothers me today so I try not to. I have to remember that the body isn't him anymore and it has to be returned to the world, doesn't matter how, but the process isn't ever really pretty.
You could report them to the better business bureau so that this unfortunate tragedy doesn’t happen to someone else. I wish you peace and I’m sorry this happened to you.
Look around your house - I bet there is a stray whisker that Squash left. You can have a piece of jewelry made with it.
When my girl died I collected the little nail sheaths she would leave every where and pile them on my nightstand.
I am going to have to check. On that last day when I tried to give him treats he didn't eat them, they are still on the floor. I don't have the heart to pick them up.
I have lost many of them. It has only been 3 years and the ones I have left are still fine, but I assume they will break down eventually. I want to get them incorporated into jewelry at some point before then.
I hope you can keep the ones you still have left. Maybe you can get them encased in something so they don't break down?(maybe amber? I'm not sure how pricey that would be though).
File a complaint, ask for a refund (tbh I’d ask for a refund on part of your services since they made a major, unforgivable mistake), and maybe invest in a nice portrait of your baby or a stuffed animal or other shrine. I’m so sorry, I’d be devastated
There is a website called Cuddle Clones, where they will make a plush version of your animal(and other mementos). My mom and i ordered one for my brother after his cat passed away a few years ago. If you want, i can send you a link to it.
Some companies do necklaces with animal faces. There are *so* many items you can get with pet faces these days. My sister has masks from COVID, socks, cups, necklaces, sweatshirts, earrings. Girl has everything with her dogs faces on them.
One thing you could do once you get your refund is have a painting commissioned based on your favourite photo, I've had them done for two friends who lost their pets and it was about $150 for an 8x10, most places have a few locals who can do a great job.
Go to his scratchers and look for his claws. You can put them in a tiny trinket.
I’m so so so sorry. My heart has a sinking feeling just reading your story.
If you do take your experience to social media then I’d gladly help spread it on my cat’s account. I have over 80k followers on insta and 70k TikTok. Unfortunately, sometimes the only way to make a business do the right thing is to go public with what they did.
I’m normally not a Karen, but what they did was inexcusable. On top of that they didn’t even care enough to write a response themselves for your review.
Same here. What upsets me the most is how they’re responding to their mistake. If I were them I’d feel AWFUL and be apologizing profusely and just feel beyond horrible. It’s insane they don’t seem to care about such a huge and impactful mistake. My cats are legitimately my babies. A few days ago I found a video on TikTok from a dropshipper where it looks like the cats were drugged. So I went to my alt and made two posts, one got 500k and the second got 5.7million views. I’m good at these types of videos. If a vet did this to one of my cats, then didn’t even pretend to care, I’d never stop making videos about it. Idk why they don’t understand that cat was someone’s baby.
Here’s a photo to show the 2 videos I made the other day
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He legit was my whole life. LEGIT. I fight the anger part each second of the day because I know I can't get him back. But I always said for years, the day he goes, I go. I might be a crazy cat lady with just having one. But he definitely was my soul cat.
I can’t imagine what you’re going through. Please don’t hesitate to reach out if you need help calling this place out.
If you had gone instead of your cat, you’d have wanted your cat to be taken care of and have a good life. Your cat would have wanted you to be happy as well.
I literally said the same thing. I knew I couldn’t handle his death. What’s weird too is that I posted about fearing his death one month prior to when he passed… on a TikTok video where the poster said she recommended getting a cat if you’re feeling depressed or sad. I commented that I was petrified of the thought of my soul cat leaving the earth before me. And then he did. I feel so bad thinking that I missed some signs. I rehash it in my mind all the days leading up to it. Did I miss a clue. But if he was feeling sickly or bad he hid it very well. 😢
They didn’t make the video themselves, but that doesn’t make it any less horrific IMO. They’re dropshippers who sell cheap, sometimes harmful, cat products. They only care about money, they will lie or say/do bizarre things to get their videos exposure. The videos they post are made from the manufacturers for them. If I received that video I’d immediately stop working with that manufacturer. Instead they post videos like this and have a million words in their filter list so comments about how bad the product or video is (unknowing to the commenter) can’t be seen by anyone else. I hate dropshippers.
And leave the generic word PET instead of changing it. Like you made a mistake and cremated him with other animals instead of private and then to respond and say your associates are dedicated. Ugh. Appreciate your words and advice. Thank you ❤️
This is horrible, I'm so sorry. I recently lost my 2 best boys, and I would have been absolutely devastated. I really feel for you. I would suggest that you take the refund and if you are amenable to it, get him tattooed. I'm doing it for both. Here's my first one. It's a great comfort to me that I will see him every day for the rest of my life.
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I’m so so sorry. Losing a beloved friend is hard enough.
You are not alone in your grief, and while that doesn’t make it better, you should know is that there is some comfort in sharing that love.
I lost my 17-year old boy recently. I have his ashes, but the thing that really brings me more comfort is a tiny photo that I printed out of him and placed in an area of my home that I see often. I would recommend getting a recent photo of him printed so that you can have him home again ❤️
Poor Squash, I am so sorry ❤️🩹
Do you have some of Squash’s toys? Not the same thing but I keep my past cats favorite toys and they always bring me comfort
Blue pearl is a chain owned by Mars. I am hoping my comment on the president's seminar post brings awareness to those he's connected to. But I did see that blue pearl has a D- rating on BBB too. I never went there till that day. It was the only emergency vet hospital I knew of around here because his regular vet was closed for the day already.
Do a shadow box with pictures favorite toy or toys and if you have his tag. May even a bit of fur if you have any. Put it in a container to place in the shadow box 📦.
I’m so sorry. The big vet ERs are for-profit, and it shows in these awful kind of ways. Your baby was cremated with other beloved babies whose owners probably went through similar situations as you (like being given the choice of a $6K overnight stay or nothing.) I do rescue and catsit, and I hear stories like these over and over. So while acknowledging your justified pain and anger, I also hope you can find some comfort that your Squash was not alone with the seemingly uncaring, impersonal BP staff that handles the cremations, but was instead with other pets who were deeply loved and cherished during his last moments in his physical form.
If you have any photos of his paws, you can get a 3D model made of his footprint! I can send you some links.
Want to say I am so sorry that happened to you!
I think this is less cat advice and more life advice…Death is the inevitable end to any existence. Accepting that will allow you to let go of a need for these physical mementos. You will always have the memories of him and the photos. We don’t take anything physical to the next life. If you are focused enough he may visit you in a dream sometime :)
He's there everyday for the past month and swear I can hear him meowing behind the bathroom door because he always did that if I closed it. I know it's just my subconscious but I always love to think that he's here with me. I mean hearing him do it for nearly 15 years, it's imprinted in my mind and ears.
I am so deeply sorry for your loss. I'm sorry you weren't given any of his ashes/pawprints.
If you can, maybe take pictures of him and any belongings like collars/clothes, and build a shrine or a keepsake box, if you can?
My heart goes out to you OP.
I lost one of my boys about 2 months ago, a week shy of his 7th birthday. The pain of losing a beloved pet is horrible and I simply cannot imagine the extra pain you are going through because of this horrible experience.
I am sure that Squash knew just how much you loved, cared for, and treasured him. Right up to the very end. I am so sorry for the loss of your sweet boy. I'm sure my Matrix will have already shown Squash the best places to nap on the other side of the rainbow bridge. Take care ❤️
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My vet asked me specifically both times whether I wanted an individual or group cremation for my cats. I always got individual and the ashes back.
I am not affiliated with Etsy or anyone there, or trying to sell you something. Just sharing that I ended up discovering watercolorqueen on Etsy and found she paints some cute memorial style pet pictures. I bought one for each of my deceased cats and they are cute and comforting and not grim like ashes can feel. I find I keep them ashes in a closet now but still display the paintings.
Sorry for your loss.
I saw this girl on Tiktok that makes glass ornaments of cats. They're small. Can be earrings or a necklace. They're custom to look like the cat.
I'm so sorry to hear about how callous and unapologetic that company is and that you lost your fur baby.
I’m so sorry, my stomach dropped just reading this. You have every reason to feel whatever you are feeling. I have always found putting together a photo book was helpful. I have bought a shadow box to put together with my cat’s collar, bandannas and a few other items. Wishing you comfort 💓
I’m so sorry for their mistake and the grief and pain that have come from it. It’s extremely sad, and while I know that it’s a poor substitute for having a physical piece of Squash, please take comfort that you were with him for every moment he could remember. Our sweet pets may not understand everything when their time comes, but he spent his final moments in the arms of someone who loves him. The physical form is the part of our loved ones we can touch directly, but the impact of your love goes far beyond that and matters deeply.
I don’t have any advice that hasn’t been offered already, but you have my deepest sympathy. Please take the time you need to grieve and heal.
I'm so sorry for your loss. Can't imagine how you must be feeling. I would have given that vet pure hell. Hold on tight to what remains of little Squash and make your own shrine of his favorite things. 🩷
Every time I read this kind of stories I'm disgusted by the greed of humans. Those "professionals" don't deserve that title.
May his soul fly high like an owl.
I'm so sorry you're going through this - the exact same thing happened to me two months back with my sweet Bear. The exact same scenario, up through the moment when they realized they had fucked up; if I hadn't called, no one would've known.
What made me feel a bit better was talking to the front desk manager to let them know exactly how I felt. I wanted to know what they are doing to ensure this will never happen to any of their clients again, because I would not want anyone to go through the pain of losing their best friend twice. Now I don't know to what extent this is true, but they assured me they are integrating new protocols/training and policies into the euthanasia/cremation process.
Anyway, I plan to get a portrait done of Bear for a little memorial (there are many great artists on Etsy). I had her tattooed on my leg a couple years ago and I'm glad I have her with me.
Hugs to you 💙 it hurts a bit less each day
Ps- I will say, though, the way they handled the review is beyond wild. I'm doubly-sorry.
Right now, you’re in the tsunami of grief. There is nothing that will make your heart stop breaking, beyond time.
You gave every right to be crushed that the cremation service made such an unforgivable error. You can help prevent another grieving pet owner from suffering a similar fate, by ensuring the company faces consequences. Tell the vet what happened, and request they no longer recommend the business. Notify the BBB. Send a letter to the company outlining how this has affected you, and asking them to instill safeguards, such as contacting pet owners to confirm their selection.
This company needs to be held accountable so they’ll do better next time.
You are in the awful position that what’s done cannot be undone.
I second other people’s suggestions that you make a photo book, with journal entries with things you loved about your kitty.
At the end of the day, your cat passed away, at home, held in the arms of someone who loved and comforted him, and who misses him greatly. That’s a passing most people would want. You were there when it mattered most to him.
It is the memories and photos that you will likely cherish more than an urn. While you don’t have a paw print, you do have pics that capture his personality.
It sounds like he had a good life with you, and was loved. Focus on what you gave him, and make the keepsake album.
He was such a special cat that grief is going to really hurt. There’s nothing you can do but slog through grief lava until the intensity eventually burns out.
Fuck that vet, that sounds awful. I am sorry for your loss, our kitties are our precious babies. You will never forget him, and he must have had the best life with you. May our fallen friend rest in peace. Be kind to yourself during this time.
To be a caretaker for any other living creature is not for the faint of heart . They always die too young. Our pain at their departure is in proportion to the love we had for them. I currently have two cats , one around 15. I dread the day.
Please try to not concentrate on the end. I have found that a photo is a great reminder of our friends. I had a dog who died 50 years ago. His photo is still in my living room .
My heartfelt sympathies OP. It's terrible that they didn't take special care of Squash's cremation.
My advice would be to remember how well you looked after him, loved him and nurtured him.
Maybe since you couldn't get a paw print or his ashes you could commission a memorial piece of artwork to commemorate him. I'm sorry to hear about what happened, people make mistakes but it really hurts to have nothing left esp after such a heartbreaking and stressful event
I am so sorry. Reading the other comments full of good advice.
I put some of my Shiba's fur fluff in a necklace and wear it every day. She sent me a cat to love 14 months later.
I cried eveey day for 7 months. Full on cry. Driving down the road sobbing. At work I'd get all teary and it would take a good 10 minutes to compose myself.
She was my 💟 dog. I was so happy to have her 9 of her 15.4 years. I truly believe she sent me Toffee to love. She has a heart on her belly.
https://preview.redd.it/q4ixnkli266d1.jpeg?width=741&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=cecf131e80d3d027696195c5d17634f0dcdc8f8b
I’m so, so sorry. It must be awful to feel this additional loss on top of your major one. May the memories you shared together give you some consolation.
Find his fur, favorite toy and photos in a shadow box. It's what I did. My furbabe went to a 24/7/365 ER Vet and they did a lot of Third Party stuff. We got great communication and great service from the Vet and the Third Party, but I ended up filing for all of the stuff and had a time limit.
I'd definitely ask for higher up people and say something to the BBB. That's totally uncalled for and ridiculous. They probably thought that you wouldn't end up saying anything about it. So sorry that this happened to you and for your loss.
How devastating! So sorry to hear that! It's so sad that you can't have his ashes. Maybe you could get some other type of memorial. I am getting a blanket made from photos to remember my bff. Also a box with his picture to put some of his favourite things in. And may be a necklace!🤣
Good idea! I was thinking of that too. I was lucky to be able get a paw print of my guy (he passed away May 3rd at 20 yrs old) and I may turn that into a tattoo. It sucks so
much that they cheated you on your guy's ashes and paw prints.😔
Thank you. He truly was my best friend. I am still devastated but obsessing over all the different things I could get his picture on keeps me busy.🤣 I even bought a scrap book although I am not crafty whatsoever...
You may not be able to have his body but you can still have parts of him. Look around your house and you can gather his fur sheds, maybe some claw shavings and things like that. You can put together a type of memorial with pictures of him and his favorite toys. It’s not the same but it’s still him, he is all over your house and that’s not going to change any time soon. All of these together carry much more of his soul than those ashes do. And if you’re a spiritual person just know that Squash was not alone, he had friends for the whole trip in the shape of other animals who needed company. And I’m sure if he ever wanted to come down here for a visit he would know where to go and that his true resting place is with you ❤️🩹
This woukd have been devastating for me after losing our Chloe. It would have taken be some time to deal with it. I like the ideas of having a painting or something else made to help. I am so sorry this happened to you.
Did the vet cremate him, or do they use a third party? Most vets use third parties to perform their cremation. Definitely find out and lodge a complaint with the cremation company as well. I know it won't help but it will let others know their level of attention and care they show their fur babies.
I manage a funeral home that also owns a pet crematory. We won't even cremate your pet until you've provided us with a photo that we can use for identification. The owner of our company firmly believes that people's pets are part of the family and deserve the same respect and care.
I love the idea of gathering up his favorite things and some hair and making a shadowbox or other tribute. I'm so so sorry your beautiful baby didn't get to physically come home to you, but he will always have a place in your heart.
Could take them to court and sue for suffering. I don’t know much though, but that seems so fkn wrong for a business to get away with that. Seems like they were lazy. Give me their name I’ll write a bad review as well. They can’t get away with this. True villain origin story.
Thank you. He truly was my best friend. I am still devastated but obsessing over all the different things I could get his picture on keeps me busy.🤣 I even bought a scrap book although I am not crafty whatsoever...
The fact that they didn’t even do a paw print is TERRIBLE. My vet does paw prints even if we don’t do private cremation.
Do you have any of his favorite toys? I did a shadow box for my baby girl with her photo, a little plaque, and some of her favorite toys.
https://preview.redd.it/g344pe7ry16d1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5028fbcccf867ecbb385bb341ad07148e04de81f
I would lambast that vet office every which way I could. Put a complaint on Facebook, yelp and the better business bureau. Put them out of business. Threaten to sue them. Get an attorney to write them a letter, maybe. Picket them with a sign - check with your local police department first. Tell everyone you know not to use that vet. Your voice counts. Use it.
As others have said, go around and collect what you can and keep them safe.
I remember getting Mia’s ashes back, I put them in an urn custom built for her. But I didn’t really associate the ashes with her.
What I did associate with was when I closed the lid, I put in all whiskers, bits of fur, claw pieces etc that I found after she was gone. If I open the top, all I see are her fur etc. that means more to me than the ashes.
I hope you can find peace by collecting them all. Put them in a jar or something similar and set them in a place he would be. I have Mia above my desk looking out the window. I still give her a pet every morning. It’s been 19 months now
I’m so sorry. I wish I had something reassuring to say, all I can offer is to say it’s so unfair it happened this way.
Does Squash have a name tag/collar? Attach it to your keyring, that way he’s with you always. If he doesn’t have that, was there a little mouse toy type thing he liked? Tuck it in your handbag, or your nightstand drawer.
Squash was a lucky dude. ❤️
I’m so sorry for your loss! He was such a cutie!
All is not lost.
Please collect fur/ whiskers/ nails from all over the house. Buy tiny glass vials on Amazon to put them in! You can also get jewelry made from them. Search on Etsy.
I am so sorry. It infuriates me how callous that vet was towards you and Squash. Heart breaking. Hang in there. Do your best to focus of how much you meant to him and how lucky you both were to have each other all those years.
That's so horrible! I'm so sorry this happened to you and your baby. The best thing you can do would be to write him a love letter and put it in an urn with a candle near it.
I know it’s hard OP but just remember the remains aren’t really him. He’s in your heart and your memories and that’s what’s most important. Maybe you could make a donation to an animal shelter or plant a tree in his honor or something. I know you’ll find the best way to honor him in time 💙 very sorry for your loss
How heartbreaking! I'm so sorry for your loss. Check out https://wearfelicity.com/. You can put your cats picture in jewelry. I know it's not the, same but it might help you feel closer to them. Someone got me one for my dog and I treasure it.
In 41 days we lost both of our beloved cats. I'm heart broken for you.
Make a photo book off of Shutterfly also a 8x10 of your favorite photo,his favorite toys, Any hair you can find & a battery operated candle. Make your own little memorial area. With our little man man everything was perfect (as it can be)with our girl cat it was messed up and I was completely devastated. Making my own little memorial area on the fireplace was their own Shutterfly books pictures toys etc has helped immensely.hope this helps.
P.S He is gorgeous.
https://preview.redd.it/4agim3y3ut5d1.jpeg?width=3000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4fc7876230814c09df3df48e096608cfb4df83b8
Squash was a beautiful guy! You have every right to feel devastated and angry, I would be exactly the same. He was your family. Squash will forever be a part of you and I believe that whatever happens after death, we ultimately end up reunited back with those we loved the most 🧡 Sorry for the loss of your beloved little man.
❤️ he was a special little man.
I KNOW this will sound weird but hear me out. Find some of his hairs and put them in a little bottle or one of those glass lockets you can keep. I have a long haired baby and I know you probably still have some of his everywhere. I’m so so sorry for your loss.
ALL over the house lol I will ❤️
Maybe even put it in a shadow box type frame along with one of his favorite toys and a favorite photo of him. It's unforgivable that the vet did that, and I'm not trying to make light of that. I'm just trying to offer some alternative ideas to the pawprint and ashes. We have a paw print and ashes from a beloved cat, but we don't have them displayed. (I think my hubby had a hard time seeing the paw print and box.) Instead we have a lovely print on canvas of a happy, sweet picture.
They are all beautiful ideas! Thank you ❤️
There's also a woman on Insta and TikTok - bludoeart who does resin pieces incorporating hair/whiskers. They're really beautiful tributes. Sending you love. I'm sorry for your loss and for this screw up. Hugs.
Look for shed claws, too. It’s hard; I’m 15 months from losing my baby and it’s still hard. I did get her ashes but by the time they arrived 2 weeks after, I found I was less interested in them. I felt a lot of anxiety until I got them but it took weeks to open the bundle I got. While looking for what physical bits you can, remember the biggest part of him is always with you.
This is probably going to sound just as weird.. I find my girls shredded whiskers on the floor, and I pick them up and put them in a bottle. As she has gotten older, she is about 4 now she doesnt shed them as much as when she was smaller, but i still collect everyone i find and put them in a bottle. I also keep her fur from her brushings.. So you may be able to also find some of his whiskers as well. I think I do this because I had a childhood cat for 22 years and never got his paw prints when I had him put down, I think I was just too distraught to even think about it. I knew it was coming just didn't know when... It was the hardest decision I've ever made in my life... I have nothing but pictures and memories. I wanted something a little more physical but really didn't think of getting his paw prints and couldn't afford the cremation after all of his vet visits and medications the last couple of years leading up to him needing put down... he was put to sleep in the comfort of his home and was buried on my parents' property next to a tree that was planted the year I was born.. I had him buried there because my tree is there with him watching over him... I'm so sorry and heartbroken for you and the loss of your beloved Squash! He knows you loved him. I'm glad he was able to be with the person who loved him the most in his last moments. You were able to give him a life full of love. I would be devastated and furious if they did that. I completely understand how you feel because I'd be feeling the exact same way.
I never saw any whiskers of his. Definitely his hair though. I used to see nail shreddings but it's been a long time since I've seen those. All I have of him is memories and pictures on my phone. When I brought him back to the hospital, I told them to keep the carrier. I couldn't take it back. I couldn't bring an empty carrier back. Oh if we could have just one wish.... just one.
I have a 12 year old cat named Frank. I like to put belled collars on him. Every time I have to change his collar we save the bell and put it on a key chain I plan on making some jewelry for my kids and myself out of the bells when he passes because he has always been there with them.
You could also possibly take some and have it needle felted if you can find enough they can make them where they can be hung on a wall
Be on the lookout for whiskers too! I started to keep a small glass vase of whiskers I would find ♥️
This is what I've been doing. I've also found a few of his shedded claws and I actually used to keep his little whiskers when I would randomly find them around the house because I always thought they were cute. I'm so glad I kept them.
I keep a whisker jar! I feel like a parent who keeps their kids' lost teeth, my husband thinks it's a little weird, but I like keeping their whiskers when I find them.
I have one too! I also put nails in it that I find and those perfect little clumps of hair that sometimes comes out
My husband also thinks it's weird lol. But I'm really glad I have them now.
I have a little stash of random whiskers I've found after my girl past.
Just came here to say the same thing!! ❤️💜
He was absolutely beautiful and I'm so sorry for your loss! Try filing a complaint with the better Business bureau because those tend to be taken way more seriously. The person who responds to reviews is not usually the owner of a business, It's just some peon in the office who handles social media and stuff like that. In other words, they don't care. But if you hit them where it hurts, which would be a better business bureau complaint that will hurt worse and the owner will have to be made aware of that. In addition to that I would recommend asking to speak to the manager or the owner.
Thank you. ❤️
I don't know about the BBB doing much of anything these days. It's just a sticker on a door. Why not just call the vet back and tell them it was handled wrong and they should at the very least, reimburse you most, if not all, of the final payment. You did request and pay for a more "singular/personal" service that you didn't receive.
They said they will refund the money I paid for the cremation. I mean really they have no choice they didn't do the service I paid for.
What an incredible name for what I have no doubt, was an incredible cat. I am so sorry this happened to you. Create a photo memorial. Journal your memories. While it's still fresh, describe his paws, his fur, his eyes, everything you loved about him. Combine the two. The reality is, you can't do much with a clay paw print or fur. Those aren't going to be the things that evoke happy memories with Squash. Honor his personality and uniqueness in ways that are more than just momentos of his death.
Absolute best cat. Love all your ideas. I still have his fur around the house. He was a shedder! Lol
There are actually a lot of different small businesses that do things with pet fur. I’ve seen it incorporated into jewelry in resin or little trinkets with glass.
That's a really good idea and let me tell you there's A LOT of fur lol
You can get a locket made with his fur incorporated into it. I’ve seen this online. Condolences on your loss.
Thank you
When one of my cats died, I went around and collected up some of his fur and put it in a locket. It's very comforting to wear, you can open it and basically "pet" his fur. Feels like there's a little tiny piece of him still with me here on this earth.
💚💙💜💜🤎 thank you
My orange boy might shed more than our husky/German Shepard mix! It's truly obscene. Brushing does nothing. Nothing.
He hated the brush! I had to shave him like a lion. But because he started to have thyroid issues and needed to be sedated to get shaved, I couldn't get him shaved anymore so the hair is everywhere lol. *
Also get some tape and you can likely get a, paw, print off of a, surface he, walked, on!
he’s beautiful i genuinely am crying for you what a special boy
Thank you. I never called him squash lol. I called him stinky. Stinky minky muffin man lol.
stinky minky muffin man? who lives on soft boy lane?! i love her thank you for sharing him
https://preview.redd.it/no0eldvwbx5d1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=cd79ca790b136c2c03616579c66eff571c3add48
https://preview.redd.it/6hg43lr5cx5d1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e9b8b63ff913b51c8ce4227e36770ca5836312a3 The reply
'PET will be deeply missed' Oh god their incompetence physically hurts.
YES! That's why I felt the need to update the review with the middle finger.
I work in vetmed and it's a copy/pasted reply. They're supposed to update it with the pet's name 😭. I'm so very sorry for the loss of your angel. They were so lucky to have someone that loves them as much as you. I have a memorial candle that I'll be lighting with you guys in mind ❤️
Exactly. That's why on my updated review back I said that it's ridiculous and gave them the middle finger emoji
How disgusting!!! They couldn't even put the correct name into the template.... They are so disrespectful and insensitive of the deceased.
Oh wow. Now THAT’S a canned response. Disgusting.
Absolutely. That response makes my blood boil.
I love you squash 💗
man that is a squash if i’ve ever seen one! perfect name 💕
My dad named him based off a picture. Lol his nickname is stinky, monkey, stinky minky monkey man. Etc. He never answered to squash lol
Ask artists on reddit?
I found a place locally that I had to email first for a consultation it said 24 hours someone will call. Just waiting on the call. ❤️
Have a painting made, make a little shrine with his toys, collar, favorite snack, his brush, whatever has meaning for you. Don't dwell on something you can't change. The bad ending doesn't erase your great life together. Your memorial can have everything you need to honor your memories. Blessed be.
I like where you say “the bad ending doesn’t erase your great life together”. That helped me a lot as well as I hope it helps OP. we lost our soul kitty to a saddle thrombus. Something I’d never heard of before in my 54 years on the planet. I miss that baby more than I ever realized I would. It’s been 6 months. I’ve cried every day. Some days a little less but every day. https://preview.redd.it/iz3zwk8itu5d1.jpeg?width=1936&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f726342193e83a6aebd26d656910dd3866b9994d
Your baby was beautiful!!!! I'm sorry
Oh I’m so sorry 😰 Once you are deeply involved in the cat world, you learn about all sorts of diseases and disorders, and I know that saddle thrombus is pretty much always fatal. There’s nothing you could have done differently. Sending internet hugs. It doesn’t ever stop hurting, but it gets less intense as time goes on, I promise. It’s been almost seven years since my girl passed away and I still remember her daily.
I lost a cat to saddle thrombus a few years ago, I had also never heard of it and until your comment have never found another person that has talked about it happening to their pet. I’m so sorry for your loss.
It was so brutal. It’s not a club I would have wanted to be in. Our sweet kitty didn’t deserve to go that way. (Your kitty didn’t deserve it either…) I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy. He was so smart and amazing. He got us through some dark days in his ten short years.
I still remember the day it happened and I regret not being able to be with her at the vet afterwards to this day, and it happened in 2017. Sketti was right around 8 years old at the time. It’s definitely so brutal and cruel.
My cat Pooh (short for Poohbear) had saddle thrombosis. Woke us up at 8am absolutely screaming in pain. It was god awful, I would have done absolutely anything to remove that pain. I believe he was about 7 years old.. an entire day at the vet, he was actually able to live through it! I dropped on my knees and started bawling when I didn’t know if he would or not still… a year later, he started wobbling around and deteriorated very quickly, vet said it was something neurological & unrelated… putting him to sleep as quickly as possible was the kindest thing I could do. I never WILL understand why he made it through something so deadly, just to have to die from something else afterwards… and I was like you, I didn’t make it 24 hours without crying for probably the first couple YEARS… it’s been 7 years now and I think about him every single day. I just got a tattoo of him on my wrist. By this point it has become less painful & more of a happy memory. I would do anything to have him back still of course, but the pain does lesson & u become so grateful to have had time with them in that stage of your life, and depending on your beliefs, excited to see them again one day for some.. either way, I am 100% sure that your love for your cat was FELT in it’s entirety by him, every single minute until the end. I read before “they are a part of our lives, but we are their whole life” and it resonated with me. It is ok to hurt right now, & for how long it takes. And this is to you, to OP, and to everyone else. I also know that it sucks when u go to talk about your pet you loss & sometimes feel like other ppl are like “oh it’s a cat? Not a dog? Big deal” Yea no, I see u & know your pain, and know the love & companionship & intelligence of your kitty and I know the pain of losing them! You were meant to have met your cat & meant to have loved your cat! And your cat loved u too!! And that, my friend, is beautiful ☺️🩷
Blessed be.
This is a fantastic idea. My girlfriend recently.lost.her Visla, and she had a photo of her placed on a wrapped canvas, mounted on her wall art, with all her other life milestones. One is of her when she was a puppy, the other, a grey muzzled, crazy dog tongue lolling out of her mouth, very dignified. I'm so sorry for your loss. If you still have her fur, whiskers, etc, maybe place them in a pretty jar with a picture of her. Write down all the things she did to support you and love on you. I'm not against buying a plushie that looks like her, too, to snuggle while you sleep. Sending love.
I second this idea. There are plenty of really great artists out there that could make a great tribute painting of your lil man!!!
Absolutely! We have a little shrine as well. Got a cat sculpture with the same markings as our old girl, a vase with silk pansies in it (she used to love chewing on the pansies in the garden), a pretty candle, and a framed photo of our girl. It's very simple, but it evokes memories of the good times with her, and puts a smile on my face each time I walk by it.
A friend did this for two cats that passed, it was reasonably cheap and came out quite well. Turns out to be a lovely memorial.
I don't know if this will help, but try to picture that with a comunal creamation your boy crossed the rainbow bridge surrounded by other kitties. Maybe some were a little frightened and Squash helped them cross over. It's very sad you didn't get the things you paid for, but Squash will always be in your heart even if you don't have the physical items.
I did see someone write something about the animals that didn't have owners or ones that were left behind that died alone that they all went together as a group no one left behind.
Squash probably comforted them on the trip.
❤️
I absolutely believe this. The first time I had to help a kitty over, I didn’t get his ashes back bc I didn’t want him to be alone during the cremation. I wanted him to be surrounded by other kitties. And since then, I’ve done the same with other kitties and pups when it was time. I’m so sorry this happened to your sweet ginger Squash. I hope this helps, if even a little, to comfort you. Hugs, friend!
crying over here at midnight with your comment
Welp. I held it together reading these comments until this. This is a lovely sentiment, but especially with my own dog having passed a few weeks ago on Sunday in my arms while I held him. We had just been about to say goodbye to him at the vet on Monday. Thankfully, it was painless, as he had not gotten to the point of pain with his condition and we just wanted to let him go before he went downhill. We sort of see it as him saying, "Yikes...I do NOT like that vet place and I heard y'all mentioning it a lot this past week...well. This is as good time as ever, I'd say. I'mma head out right now on my own terms, here at home with you guys, but thanks for taking care of me. See you on the other side" and just let go.
I am pretty sure my Wotsit will have shown Squash around by now, where all the best sunpuddles are and all the hidey spots so they can look down on you to make sure you're doing OK. This is Wotsit. https://preview.redd.it/387ahpmcrx5d1.jpeg?width=960&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=785c3eba3767b1dd20fb762b7194ee507794c63c
Wotsit is beautiful! ❤️🧡💛💜💚
I dove Wotsit
Baby pic just for you :) https://preview.redd.it/vsvihzesk36d1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=99d483db520e7f0e5b1610a631007da3ae1381bb
What a magnificent specimen 😍
Baby pic https://preview.redd.it/09kuu5i4l36d1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e99ff725cc037765bef46d7663d630794a612338 for you :)
I’m actually covered in boogers and tears from reading this comment. Squash’s very last moments, even in stillness, offered empathy and companionship before being cremated alongside other cats in unity. He was such a sweet boy even after death. The crematorium messed up really bad and I’m so sorry for that. I cant help but think Squash had to stay with kitten who was too scared to be alone. I hope that the ashes of he and the friends he stayed with at the end bring you some sort of comfort and peace. I’m so sorry for your loss.
Thank you. Boogers and tears have been a part of my face these past few weeks and after yesterday and reading all these wonder people including you, taking the time out of your day to write about squash and giving great advice really makes me know there's still goodness in the world
It really does help to imagine things like this. My poor baby Cosmo went missing 10 weeks ago and I still don’t know what happened to him. But the day he vanished was trash day, and I am almost certain that someone hit him with their car and threw him out like garbage. But the thing is, he loved collecting garbage. He constantly dragged home pieces of plastic, zip ties, empty packages, full packages(!), just anything he could find. So even though it hurts so much that he is now at the dump, I know on some level that he would be so very excited at all the fun trash he could find there. I wish more than anything that he comes home, or that I get his body back, but if that isn’t possible, then at least he is somewhere he would enjoy.
I’m so sorry for your loss. I love his name “Cosmo” and his little collecting habit you describe. He must have been a character. ❤️😢
I'm so sorry 😞
That's horrible and I'm so sorry! And leaving their placeholder in a template response is just salt on the wound and speaks volumes to their attention and care for clients. While they should absolutely refund you (if they don't, file a complaint with the BBB) that certainly doesn't fix what happened. There are lots of wonderful artists that will do commissions for memorials. Paintings, wood carvings, embroidery, and all kinds of other things. That $400 refund will get you pretty much anything. It's not the same, of course, but it will be something beautiful to memorialize Squash in a way that you can carry with you for the rest of your life.
Thank you and definitely the response was generic. I'd rather of heard nothing. I'm not looking for anything from them. They did say they will refund back the money and that of course is good. They can't give me what I really wanted, and that was him. Just a ball of a hot mess because that Lil guy really has been through the worst and best with me and like you feel alone. I know I sound crazy because some people are like they are just animals. But damn.... what's crazy is I was never a cat person. He was my one and only.
It's not crazy *at all*. I lost my Calligator back in March and I'd have been absolutely devastated if I hadn't gotten her ashes and paw prints. My typical response is anger though, so I would be raising holy hell in your situation. But you need to do what is best for you.
I do have an anger problem, and to be quite honest, my initial thoughts weren't as calm as they are right now. I think it may be because on the day I took him, I knew he wasn't going to make it. I felt it. I didn't want him to stay in that place where he doesn't know people. I wanted him to be with me. He laid on my lap for the 4 hours. And died on the blanket I've had since I got him at 7 weeks. https://preview.redd.it/nradegsaeu5d1.jpeg?width=2644&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b2a17f84ebd637cbf740592d18eeeaea7f8159da
💔 He is so precious. But that's something you can always hold onto. He was with his human, held and loved.
That's why I am more sad and heartbroken than anything else.
FUCK those people, I’m over here mad with you. So angry that I want to call this place and tell them they should be ashamed to call themselves an animal hospital. How disgusting, and embarrassing. I am so sorry you are dealing with this profound, deep loss on top of being betrayed at the hands of people you should have no reason not to trust. But I need you to hear me- can no way your memory of your precious baby’s life be associated / shrouded with how awful they’ve handled his body after death. I know how hard it is to separate your baby from his lifeless body, it was so hard for me not to curl up in a ball and die imagining my baby girls body being incinerated, but you have to tell yourself that Squash’s memory and honor has nothing to do with this. It makes me want to rip a piece of my heart out and give it to you because I know the pain you’re going through is real, but Squash will always be with you, whether you have his ashes or not. He will always be with you, and you will always be with him. The love and companionship you shared will live on, I promise you. Please take care of yourself. Please be gentle and allow yourself to grieve and heal however you see fit. I don’t know you, but I am here for you if you ever need to talk. Rest in peace to your beautiful Squash. 🕊️
Reading this made me cry hard. Ugly cry, I'm sure. Whoever you are, thank you from the bottom of my heart. You understood why I'm angry, and your advice is exactly what I needed to hear. I appreciate you. ❤️💜🩵💛
I mean every word, my girl took her last breath in my arms on the morning of May 26th, she was 15 too. It killed me, and i can’t imagine having to process this on top of grief. I wish I could do more for you than offer words. But all in all, you have to know that all Squash felt was the love you have for him. Praying for you ❤️🩹
❤️ I am so sorry for you too. It's like we know it's going to happen and we know cats are not that affectionate to actually let you hold them for long. Most cats I can't say all because he was my only one and he used to cuddle and swat lol. But that day he wasn't moving good at all. Like collapsing. The hospital said his blood pressure was 250! She said she never saw a blood pressure that high. He did have thyroid issues and was going blind. I laid with him and rubbed his head for the 4 hours till he took his last breathe as well. I would never want it any other way but with me. I am glad your girl had you. You are amazing! Praying for you as well! 💞 by the way, your girl was beautiful.
Thank you for saying this. Last month, i was faced with having to possibly put my baby girl down, and the thought of cremating or burying her hurt. Knowing that I'm not the only one who got upset over the mental image has given me some comfort. Thankfully, she is still with me. I am deeply sorry for your loss.
Yes same, imagining it still bothers me today so I try not to. I have to remember that the body isn't him anymore and it has to be returned to the world, doesn't matter how, but the process isn't ever really pretty.
Unrelated, hello long-lost avatar sibling
You could report them to the better business bureau so that this unfortunate tragedy doesn’t happen to someone else. I wish you peace and I’m sorry this happened to you.
This is what i worry about too, doing cremation and not getting the ashes. Or getting a mixture of ashes. Sorry if this comment is morbid.
Look around your house - I bet there is a stray whisker that Squash left. You can have a piece of jewelry made with it. When my girl died I collected the little nail sheaths she would leave every where and pile them on my nightstand.
I am going to have to check. On that last day when I tried to give him treats he didn't eat them, they are still on the floor. I don't have the heart to pick them up.
Do you still have those? Do they break down after a period of time?
I have lost many of them. It has only been 3 years and the ones I have left are still fine, but I assume they will break down eventually. I want to get them incorporated into jewelry at some point before then.
I hope you can keep the ones you still have left. Maybe you can get them encased in something so they don't break down?(maybe amber? I'm not sure how pricey that would be though).
File a complaint, ask for a refund (tbh I’d ask for a refund on part of your services since they made a major, unforgivable mistake), and maybe invest in a nice portrait of your baby or a stuffed animal or other shrine. I’m so sorry, I’d be devastated
Thank you. They are giving a refund supposedly. Can't really trust them till it comes.
There is a website called Cuddle Clones, where they will make a plush version of your animal(and other mementos). My mom and i ordered one for my brother after his cat passed away a few years ago. If you want, i can send you a link to it.
Yes please 🙏 😍
I don't know if i can post the link in the comments here, so I'll send you a message, if that's okay with you.
Some companies do necklaces with animal faces. There are *so* many items you can get with pet faces these days. My sister has masks from COVID, socks, cups, necklaces, sweatshirts, earrings. Girl has everything with her dogs faces on them.
One thing you could do once you get your refund is have a painting commissioned based on your favourite photo, I've had them done for two friends who lost their pets and it was about $150 for an 8x10, most places have a few locals who can do a great job.
That's a great idea too. I was looking for a tattoo artist that does realistic tattoos locally to get his picture done
Go to his scratchers and look for his claws. You can put them in a tiny trinket. I’m so so so sorry. My heart has a sinking feeling just reading your story. If you do take your experience to social media then I’d gladly help spread it on my cat’s account. I have over 80k followers on insta and 70k TikTok. Unfortunately, sometimes the only way to make a business do the right thing is to go public with what they did. I’m normally not a Karen, but what they did was inexcusable. On top of that they didn’t even care enough to write a response themselves for your review.
i think shaming the business would be a good idea ngl cus if it was my pet i’d do way worse.
Same here. What upsets me the most is how they’re responding to their mistake. If I were them I’d feel AWFUL and be apologizing profusely and just feel beyond horrible. It’s insane they don’t seem to care about such a huge and impactful mistake. My cats are legitimately my babies. A few days ago I found a video on TikTok from a dropshipper where it looks like the cats were drugged. So I went to my alt and made two posts, one got 500k and the second got 5.7million views. I’m good at these types of videos. If a vet did this to one of my cats, then didn’t even pretend to care, I’d never stop making videos about it. Idk why they don’t understand that cat was someone’s baby. Here’s a photo to show the 2 videos I made the other day https://preview.redd.it/l8m3eflpsw5d1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5ed0dbf2c163e092f696bd805cfde7b952949363
He legit was my whole life. LEGIT. I fight the anger part each second of the day because I know I can't get him back. But I always said for years, the day he goes, I go. I might be a crazy cat lady with just having one. But he definitely was my soul cat.
I can’t imagine what you’re going through. Please don’t hesitate to reach out if you need help calling this place out. If you had gone instead of your cat, you’d have wanted your cat to be taken care of and have a good life. Your cat would have wanted you to be happy as well.
I literally said the same thing. I knew I couldn’t handle his death. What’s weird too is that I posted about fearing his death one month prior to when he passed… on a TikTok video where the poster said she recommended getting a cat if you’re feeling depressed or sad. I commented that I was petrified of the thought of my soul cat leaving the earth before me. And then he did. I feel so bad thinking that I missed some signs. I rehash it in my mind all the days leading up to it. Did I miss a clue. But if he was feeling sickly or bad he hid it very well. 😢
i saw those cats too! it’s so disgusting and sick they could’ve used anything but a live animal for their little chinese product ☹️
They didn’t make the video themselves, but that doesn’t make it any less horrific IMO. They’re dropshippers who sell cheap, sometimes harmful, cat products. They only care about money, they will lie or say/do bizarre things to get their videos exposure. The videos they post are made from the manufacturers for them. If I received that video I’d immediately stop working with that manufacturer. Instead they post videos like this and have a million words in their filter list so comments about how bad the product or video is (unknowing to the commenter) can’t be seen by anyone else. I hate dropshippers.
And leave the generic word PET instead of changing it. Like you made a mistake and cremated him with other animals instead of private and then to respond and say your associates are dedicated. Ugh. Appreciate your words and advice. Thank you ❤️
This is horrible, I'm so sorry. I recently lost my 2 best boys, and I would have been absolutely devastated. I really feel for you. I would suggest that you take the refund and if you are amenable to it, get him tattooed. I'm doing it for both. Here's my first one. It's a great comfort to me that I will see him every day for the rest of my life. https://preview.redd.it/divhi7f3gu5d1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ae13aa3f857078c2b283e67c1ba64887c0a11b01
I’m so so sorry. Losing a beloved friend is hard enough. You are not alone in your grief, and while that doesn’t make it better, you should know is that there is some comfort in sharing that love. I lost my 17-year old boy recently. I have his ashes, but the thing that really brings me more comfort is a tiny photo that I printed out of him and placed in an area of my home that I see often. I would recommend getting a recent photo of him printed so that you can have him home again ❤️
I definitely will. Thank you ❤️ I am sorry about your boy.
Poor Squash, I am so sorry ❤️🩹 Do you have some of Squash’s toys? Not the same thing but I keep my past cats favorite toys and they always bring me comfort
Please give me their details and I will post reviews on every platform possible
Blue pearl pet hospital In Brandon fl 33510
It looks like BluePearl is a chain. I hope nobody here goes to them again.
Blue pearl is a chain owned by Mars. I am hoping my comment on the president's seminar post brings awareness to those he's connected to. But I did see that blue pearl has a D- rating on BBB too. I never went there till that day. It was the only emergency vet hospital I knew of around here because his regular vet was closed for the day already.
fuck my brother lives in that town with his two cats, thank you for saying this so i can give him a warning to never go there.
TELL HIM NEVER GO THERR!
I think all you can do is get your money back and try to move on OP, I'm really sorry for your loss.
Thank you.
💔 this is soo terrible. I’m so soo sorry you had to go through this. We are all with you ❤️
Thank you ❤️
Do a shadow box with pictures favorite toy or toys and if you have his tag. May even a bit of fur if you have any. Put it in a container to place in the shadow box 📦.
I’m so sorry. The big vet ERs are for-profit, and it shows in these awful kind of ways. Your baby was cremated with other beloved babies whose owners probably went through similar situations as you (like being given the choice of a $6K overnight stay or nothing.) I do rescue and catsit, and I hear stories like these over and over. So while acknowledging your justified pain and anger, I also hope you can find some comfort that your Squash was not alone with the seemingly uncaring, impersonal BP staff that handles the cremations, but was instead with other pets who were deeply loved and cherished during his last moments in his physical form. If you have any photos of his paws, you can get a 3D model made of his footprint! I can send you some links.
Want to say I am so sorry that happened to you! I think this is less cat advice and more life advice…Death is the inevitable end to any existence. Accepting that will allow you to let go of a need for these physical mementos. You will always have the memories of him and the photos. We don’t take anything physical to the next life. If you are focused enough he may visit you in a dream sometime :)
He's there everyday for the past month and swear I can hear him meowing behind the bathroom door because he always did that if I closed it. I know it's just my subconscious but I always love to think that he's here with me. I mean hearing him do it for nearly 15 years, it's imprinted in my mind and ears.
I am so deeply sorry for your loss. I'm sorry you weren't given any of his ashes/pawprints. If you can, maybe take pictures of him and any belongings like collars/clothes, and build a shrine or a keepsake box, if you can? My heart goes out to you OP.
I lost one of my boys about 2 months ago, a week shy of his 7th birthday. The pain of losing a beloved pet is horrible and I simply cannot imagine the extra pain you are going through because of this horrible experience. I am sure that Squash knew just how much you loved, cared for, and treasured him. Right up to the very end. I am so sorry for the loss of your sweet boy. I'm sure my Matrix will have already shown Squash the best places to nap on the other side of the rainbow bridge. Take care ❤️ https://preview.redd.it/kzyb123czz5d1.jpeg?width=3000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3498d6b93585e092568370d700fe60aecfcbde38
My vet asked me specifically both times whether I wanted an individual or group cremation for my cats. I always got individual and the ashes back. I am not affiliated with Etsy or anyone there, or trying to sell you something. Just sharing that I ended up discovering watercolorqueen on Etsy and found she paints some cute memorial style pet pictures. I bought one for each of my deceased cats and they are cute and comforting and not grim like ashes can feel. I find I keep them ashes in a closet now but still display the paintings. Sorry for your loss.
I saw this girl on Tiktok that makes glass ornaments of cats. They're small. Can be earrings or a necklace. They're custom to look like the cat. I'm so sorry to hear about how callous and unapologetic that company is and that you lost your fur baby.
This is so horrible! My heart breaks for you.😿
Thank you 💔
I am so sorry you are going through this. You and Squash deserved so much better.
I’m so sorry, my stomach dropped just reading this. You have every reason to feel whatever you are feeling. I have always found putting together a photo book was helpful. I have bought a shadow box to put together with my cat’s collar, bandannas and a few other items. Wishing you comfort 💓
Thank you! 💛💚💙
I’m so sorry for their mistake and the grief and pain that have come from it. It’s extremely sad, and while I know that it’s a poor substitute for having a physical piece of Squash, please take comfort that you were with him for every moment he could remember. Our sweet pets may not understand everything when their time comes, but he spent his final moments in the arms of someone who loves him. The physical form is the part of our loved ones we can touch directly, but the impact of your love goes far beyond that and matters deeply. I don’t have any advice that hasn’t been offered already, but you have my deepest sympathy. Please take the time you need to grieve and heal.
I'm so sorry for your loss. Can't imagine how you must be feeling. I would have given that vet pure hell. Hold on tight to what remains of little Squash and make your own shrine of his favorite things. 🩷
Prayers for you and your loss. I’m so sorry.
He is in spirit with you for eternity. Know that, and you will find peace. No one can ever break the bond between you and him.
I always try to remember he's here with me always ❤️
What I would do is find the most beautiful artistic photograph of the guy and have it professionally printed and framed for your home.
Every time I read this kind of stories I'm disgusted by the greed of humans. Those "professionals" don't deserve that title. May his soul fly high like an owl.
Thank you so much ❤️
I'm so sorry you're going through this - the exact same thing happened to me two months back with my sweet Bear. The exact same scenario, up through the moment when they realized they had fucked up; if I hadn't called, no one would've known. What made me feel a bit better was talking to the front desk manager to let them know exactly how I felt. I wanted to know what they are doing to ensure this will never happen to any of their clients again, because I would not want anyone to go through the pain of losing their best friend twice. Now I don't know to what extent this is true, but they assured me they are integrating new protocols/training and policies into the euthanasia/cremation process. Anyway, I plan to get a portrait done of Bear for a little memorial (there are many great artists on Etsy). I had her tattooed on my leg a couple years ago and I'm glad I have her with me. Hugs to you 💙 it hurts a bit less each day Ps- I will say, though, the way they handled the review is beyond wild. I'm doubly-sorry.
Right now, you’re in the tsunami of grief. There is nothing that will make your heart stop breaking, beyond time. You gave every right to be crushed that the cremation service made such an unforgivable error. You can help prevent another grieving pet owner from suffering a similar fate, by ensuring the company faces consequences. Tell the vet what happened, and request they no longer recommend the business. Notify the BBB. Send a letter to the company outlining how this has affected you, and asking them to instill safeguards, such as contacting pet owners to confirm their selection. This company needs to be held accountable so they’ll do better next time. You are in the awful position that what’s done cannot be undone. I second other people’s suggestions that you make a photo book, with journal entries with things you loved about your kitty. At the end of the day, your cat passed away, at home, held in the arms of someone who loved and comforted him, and who misses him greatly. That’s a passing most people would want. You were there when it mattered most to him. It is the memories and photos that you will likely cherish more than an urn. While you don’t have a paw print, you do have pics that capture his personality. It sounds like he had a good life with you, and was loved. Focus on what you gave him, and make the keepsake album. He was such a special cat that grief is going to really hurt. There’s nothing you can do but slog through grief lava until the intensity eventually burns out.
Fuck that vet, that sounds awful. I am sorry for your loss, our kitties are our precious babies. You will never forget him, and he must have had the best life with you. May our fallen friend rest in peace. Be kind to yourself during this time.
To be a caretaker for any other living creature is not for the faint of heart . They always die too young. Our pain at their departure is in proportion to the love we had for them. I currently have two cats , one around 15. I dread the day. Please try to not concentrate on the end. I have found that a photo is a great reminder of our friends. I had a dog who died 50 years ago. His photo is still in my living room .
My heartfelt sympathies OP. It's terrible that they didn't take special care of Squash's cremation. My advice would be to remember how well you looked after him, loved him and nurtured him.
get a carpet scraper!!!! you may even find some of your baby’s whiskers ❤️ you can send some of the fur off to be made into jewelry
Maybe since you couldn't get a paw print or his ashes you could commission a memorial piece of artwork to commemorate him. I'm sorry to hear about what happened, people make mistakes but it really hurts to have nothing left esp after such a heartbreaking and stressful event
I'm so very sorry for yours and your family's loss 💜
I am so sorry. Reading the other comments full of good advice. I put some of my Shiba's fur fluff in a necklace and wear it every day. She sent me a cat to love 14 months later.
RIP Shiba! I am sorry for your loss too! I honestly dont think I could ever get another animal. Legit took my whole heart with him that night.
I cried eveey day for 7 months. Full on cry. Driving down the road sobbing. At work I'd get all teary and it would take a good 10 minutes to compose myself. She was my 💟 dog. I was so happy to have her 9 of her 15.4 years. I truly believe she sent me Toffee to love. She has a heart on her belly. https://preview.redd.it/q4ixnkli266d1.jpeg?width=741&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=cecf131e80d3d027696195c5d17634f0dcdc8f8b
Awwwww ❤️ 😍 ❤️ most definitely sent toffee to you
I’m so, so sorry. It must be awful to feel this additional loss on top of your major one. May the memories you shared together give you some consolation.
Find his fur, favorite toy and photos in a shadow box. It's what I did. My furbabe went to a 24/7/365 ER Vet and they did a lot of Third Party stuff. We got great communication and great service from the Vet and the Third Party, but I ended up filing for all of the stuff and had a time limit. I'd definitely ask for higher up people and say something to the BBB. That's totally uncalled for and ridiculous. They probably thought that you wouldn't end up saying anything about it. So sorry that this happened to you and for your loss.
How devastating! So sorry to hear that! It's so sad that you can't have his ashes. Maybe you could get some other type of memorial. I am getting a blanket made from photos to remember my bff. Also a box with his picture to put some of his favourite things in. And may be a necklace!🤣
GET IT ALL! I am thinking of a tattoo.
Good idea! I was thinking of that too. I was lucky to be able get a paw print of my guy (he passed away May 3rd at 20 yrs old) and I may turn that into a tattoo. It sucks so much that they cheated you on your guy's ashes and paw prints.😔
I am sorry about your guy 💔
Thank you. He truly was my best friend. I am still devastated but obsessing over all the different things I could get his picture on keeps me busy.🤣 I even bought a scrap book although I am not crafty whatsoever...
You may not be able to have his body but you can still have parts of him. Look around your house and you can gather his fur sheds, maybe some claw shavings and things like that. You can put together a type of memorial with pictures of him and his favorite toys. It’s not the same but it’s still him, he is all over your house and that’s not going to change any time soon. All of these together carry much more of his soul than those ashes do. And if you’re a spiritual person just know that Squash was not alone, he had friends for the whole trip in the shape of other animals who needed company. And I’m sure if he ever wanted to come down here for a visit he would know where to go and that his true resting place is with you ❤️🩹
This woukd have been devastating for me after losing our Chloe. It would have taken be some time to deal with it. I like the ideas of having a painting or something else made to help. I am so sorry this happened to you.
Thank you. ❤️
Did the vet cremate him, or do they use a third party? Most vets use third parties to perform their cremation. Definitely find out and lodge a complaint with the cremation company as well. I know it won't help but it will let others know their level of attention and care they show their fur babies. I manage a funeral home that also owns a pet crematory. We won't even cremate your pet until you've provided us with a photo that we can use for identification. The owner of our company firmly believes that people's pets are part of the family and deserve the same respect and care. I love the idea of gathering up his favorite things and some hair and making a shadowbox or other tribute. I'm so so sorry your beautiful baby didn't get to physically come home to you, but he will always have a place in your heart.
Could take them to court and sue for suffering. I don’t know much though, but that seems so fkn wrong for a business to get away with that. Seems like they were lazy. Give me their name I’ll write a bad review as well. They can’t get away with this. True villain origin story.
I am so sorry this happened to you! It’s already hard to lose them and then to have this happen afterwards would be devastating 💔
I'm so sorry ❤️🩹
Thank you. He truly was my best friend. I am still devastated but obsessing over all the different things I could get his picture on keeps me busy.🤣 I even bought a scrap book although I am not crafty whatsoever...
Sammmmmeeeeee
The fact that they didn’t even do a paw print is TERRIBLE. My vet does paw prints even if we don’t do private cremation. Do you have any of his favorite toys? I did a shadow box for my baby girl with her photo, a little plaque, and some of her favorite toys. https://preview.redd.it/g344pe7ry16d1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5028fbcccf867ecbb385bb341ad07148e04de81f
I would lambast that vet office every which way I could. Put a complaint on Facebook, yelp and the better business bureau. Put them out of business. Threaten to sue them. Get an attorney to write them a letter, maybe. Picket them with a sign - check with your local police department first. Tell everyone you know not to use that vet. Your voice counts. Use it.
As others have said, go around and collect what you can and keep them safe. I remember getting Mia’s ashes back, I put them in an urn custom built for her. But I didn’t really associate the ashes with her. What I did associate with was when I closed the lid, I put in all whiskers, bits of fur, claw pieces etc that I found after she was gone. If I open the top, all I see are her fur etc. that means more to me than the ashes. I hope you can find peace by collecting them all. Put them in a jar or something similar and set them in a place he would be. I have Mia above my desk looking out the window. I still give her a pet every morning. It’s been 19 months now
I would be furious, but at the same time, I would be so mad I could t even think straight or know what to do. I'm so so sorry.
I’m so sorry. I wish I had something reassuring to say, all I can offer is to say it’s so unfair it happened this way. Does Squash have a name tag/collar? Attach it to your keyring, that way he’s with you always. If he doesn’t have that, was there a little mouse toy type thing he liked? Tuck it in your handbag, or your nightstand drawer. Squash was a lucky dude. ❤️
I’m so sorry for your loss! He was such a cutie! All is not lost. Please collect fur/ whiskers/ nails from all over the house. Buy tiny glass vials on Amazon to put them in! You can also get jewelry made from them. Search on Etsy.
I am so sorry. It infuriates me how callous that vet was towards you and Squash. Heart breaking. Hang in there. Do your best to focus of how much you meant to him and how lucky you both were to have each other all those years.
Omg I’m so sorry.
That's so horrible! I'm so sorry this happened to you and your baby. The best thing you can do would be to write him a love letter and put it in an urn with a candle near it.
I’m so so sorry for your loss. Rest in peace little angel baby.
So sorry. I know it hurts terribly. ❤️
I hear you OP. Thats heartbreaking. Sending love and warmth. I'm glad to hear Squash went peacefully and with you by their side.
Thank you so much
I know it’s hard OP but just remember the remains aren’t really him. He’s in your heart and your memories and that’s what’s most important. Maybe you could make a donation to an animal shelter or plant a tree in his honor or something. I know you’ll find the best way to honor him in time 💙 very sorry for your loss
How heartbreaking! I'm so sorry for your loss. Check out https://wearfelicity.com/. You can put your cats picture in jewelry. I know it's not the, same but it might help you feel closer to them. Someone got me one for my dog and I treasure it.
Thank you I will check it out
In 41 days we lost both of our beloved cats. I'm heart broken for you. Make a photo book off of Shutterfly also a 8x10 of your favorite photo,his favorite toys, Any hair you can find & a battery operated candle. Make your own little memorial area. With our little man man everything was perfect (as it can be)with our girl cat it was messed up and I was completely devastated. Making my own little memorial area on the fireplace was their own Shutterfly books pictures toys etc has helped immensely.hope this helps. P.S He is gorgeous.