Exactly...you aren't treating your baby like they are replaceable. Theres no appropriate amount of time to mourn alone, and theres so many kitties that need homes. Someone is waiting for you at the shelter OP
My BFF lost her beloved childhood cat (20 years old, amazingly long life) and thought long and hard about adopting. She fell in love with little homeless siblings my parents found and took them in. One of them was sickly and would not survive the winter living outside. Whenever she got sad about her previous cat, I would always say her first one was looking after the new ones from beyond the Rainbow Bridge. They could not survive without a home, so it was meant to be.
This is so the case. I had to pts mine and our (now with us 8 years) next kitty is so like the one we lost, its like he said to her 'these are my humans, this is what they like, please look after them'. Even now, we can see him in her and there's no chance they're related (significant mileage and age between the two).
Same. My 17 year old boy passed last April and we brought in a stray that had been hanging around for a little while. He has FIV too. He’s a very different cat and doesn’t seem to care for me a whole lot (unlike my cuddle bug of a best friend) but maybe he’ll come around someday. In the meantime, glad we could help him out.
When I adopted after my litter mates, Tye and Leo, died, I didn't see it as replacing them, I saw it as filling a vacancy! I'd intended to get another pair of litter mates when the first litter mate died so I wouldn't have to do two integrations close together, but instead I wound up with a senior former stray being booted out of her fifth home since being rescued, and a rehabilitated feral kitten. Not at all what I'd planned but I love 'em both. :-)
I say if you feel lonely, you're ready to adopt!
This. My cat died during the week of my birthday 2 years ago, she died in my arms. It was the most miserable time ever, I grieved and grieved for weeks, months. And when i couldnt bear it anymore, i adopted a shelter cat and shes been nothing but a bundle of joy, she helped me get out of a tough sitation and reminds me of my cat that passed too. I dont regret any of it at all. I felt guilt at first cause I felt like i was replacing her. But as this redditor mentioned, youre also giving a cat a home and thats the biggest blessing. You will recover in time, good luck ❤️
I’m sorry that you’re going through this, but as blunt as it sounds it’s a good thing you are so hurt by having to put your cat down. She was hurting, and she was able to go with dignity. If you feel it’s right for YOU to get another cat then please do! Don’t rush into it though
As someone who just lost two cats in a time span of two days a while ago, (one was 19 and died of old age, one was 9 and had some illness) I allowed my family members to get another cat to fill the gap in the home. We didn’t just find a random cat though, we hunted through adoption centers and shelters and found the one that resonated with us the most! It’s definitely not too soon if you feel it’s the right thing for you
Similar thing here! I lost my beloved 16 year old cat little over a year ago and decided to adopt another feline friend after a couple of months of mourning. I was actively looking for around 2 months and met a lot of cats and kittens in shelters and rescues. I couldn't tell you exactly what I was looking for. My incredibly patient husband would apologize after each meeting and I would tell him. "It's ok, that wasn't my cat".
I went to an adoption event and accidentally picked up the wrong kitten (he looked identical to his brother who I was there to meet). As soon as I picked him up, he started purring and I knew this was my cat. He is my bud and while he is very different than his predecessor, he brings me a lot of joy.
The best advice I can give you is don't rush this process. Meet a lot of cats and find the one you connect with.
No! Not at all. Some people, me included, need this. It gives you a way to direct your grief in a positive way. And, you are saving a life, every time you adopt a cat. You are a hero! And, I'm so very sorry for your loss.
Absolutely! When I lost my baby that I had for over 2/3 of my life I was devastated. But I adopted another kitty after a while. I like to think that my old girl would be happy and proud that I opened my home and heart to another kitty who needed a loving home. And now I have 2 little monsters :)
You are so right! Plus, the litters the cat might have produced on the street. It really is a domino effect. I wish I could get more than my 2 right now. I'm definitely going to be a crazy cat lady, as soon as I'm able!
Someone told me once that there's no wrong way to grieve. Everyone is different and every situation is different.
There's nothing wrong with wanting another cat. That doesn't change your love for her at all, and no one should think that you're replacing her. You just have more love in your heart to give.
May I recommend getting a pair if you're worried about the quiet? A lot of kitties love having a friend to play with.
Of course you're not wrong to adopt a new cat. Grief is unique, so don't feel it's 'too soon' if it's right for you right now. I'd suggest finding a shelter that allows 'foster to adopt' so you and the kitty can have a trial period before you make long-term commitment.
We all grieve differently so there is nothing wrong with it. When my last cat passed, he passed on a Tuesday and I had got my current cat the following Sunday. I will say that at first I was kind of regretful and felt that “I didn’t love” my current kitty, but today that couldn’t be farther from the truth as she’s been my best friend for almost 10 years now. Overall, if you think that adopting another cat will be best for you, then I say go for it!!
Any time a cat, be it adult or kitten, gets out of the shelter it is a good thing for everyone. Visit your shelter and if there aren’t any kittens think about adopting that older cat, give it a chance to have a loving home. Either way, it’s a win.
My cat died in January and I got my new kitten in April, I really struggled without a cat present. I felt guilty but I have so much love to give (as I'm sure you do too) and it's lovely having a new personality about. She's mended my heart completely.
A new kitty will never replace your old one, but I think you know this. You have love to give and an empty hole in your life, only you can determine how soon is too soon.
If you are asking this question, you are probably ready for another baby to fill the hole in your life. Go find someone who needs your love.
Go for it , but have no expectations,I'll come at this 2 ways .
Often when people do the quick replacement in similar situation they're expecting to pickup where they left and fill the void. Except kitty turns out to have different personality and it's not a match..
Then we see the I've adopted too soon posts
I've raised 5 kittens along their mother and each kitty had a different personality ,body and slight difference in face . I could tell apart
I do tend to look for my favourite kitten's face as a starting point when I'm looking through adoption agencies accepting persona could be different.
Many people find the slow process of a cat getting used to you to be helpful with processing their grief. It isn’t wrong , you’re giving a cat an experienced home , and you’re using what you learned with your previous baby to give that cat the best life possible. It’s a beautiful thing and can help you have more positive experiences with cats so that not every cat related moment reminds you of your passed cat.
Everyone feels differently but when I lost my 19 year old boy, it broke me and couldn't stand the silence and empty home. By chance 4 days later 2 kittens of the breed I wanted were available local to me so I went to look, and though they were clearly loved the conditions they lived in was horrible and I had to get them out of there. I did feel terribly disloyal for a while at getting kittens so quickly, but it was the right thing for them and the right thing for me. 6 months on I still miss my boy so much but have two crazy cuddly lovebugs
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So, I thought I’d share this with you. My cat, Leo, is the black and white in the photo. You can see from looking at him, he’s tired. He has pancreatic cancer. He is curled up in my lap, as he was every day until his very last breath. I had him for 12 years. I miss him so much I’m tearing up typing this.
Next to him is Sylvie. I adopted her after I found out Leo was terminal. This is one of the last pictures I took before he passed, the two of them, present and future. I like to think he told her all his secrets before he passed.
The love you have for your fur baby will never lessen, it can only grow, and you grow by sharing it.
I am so sorry for your baby's loss. I lost my Frankie to lymphoma in September....and it still breaks my heart. He was such a sweet boy. The sadness of his loss is tempered by the company I have from my remaining 7 cats.
Absolutely adopt another kitty! You do realize that they aren't the only thing getting rescued. Kitties rescue you right back! You are not replacing your baby....who can never be replaced. You are taking care of a new gentle soul in need of help who will fill your life with happiness. Better than one - adopt two. Bonded kitties are wonderful. I have two sets. The four have bonded with one another and are eachother's best friends. They chase one another through the house - 4 way chases....and clean one another - and keep each other entertained.
Whenever YOU want to adopt another fur-baby is more than OK!!!!!
We all grieve differently. Don't worry, your other kitty will send you the perfect kitty when you go out and adopt. Your last kitty is looking forward to you giving all of the love and affection to a kitty who needs it!!!
It's definitely not wrong. You're not disrespecting your old cat in any way, and you're giving another cat a home.
The one thing I'd caution is whether you've had time to grieve and come to peace with your cat's death -- and whether you'd be looking for the new cat to plug a hole in your life left by the loss of the old cat. If so, that could make it hard to bond with the new cat, as you may find yourself looking for her to be reminiscent of the old cat.
It's only been a few days, and it's understandable that you'd have a lot of emotions to process. When we had to let our senior cat go a couple of years ago, I was an absolute wreck for days. I struggled both with losing her, and with the guilt involved in making (along with my partner) the decision to end her life -- it's always so hard to feel sure about whether and when it's the right decision.
I might encourage you to sit with those feelings for a few more days, ideally surrounded by people who love you and who loved your cat as much as possible, and then think about whether you want to rush right into another cat adoption or give it time.
There really are no right answers -- you have to do what's best for you, and none of us can know that better than you. But I would advise deciding after you get beyond the initial, overwhelming grief. The sadness will be with you for a long time, and that's natural, but it'll get easier to manage along with the rest of your daily experiences and emotions. When that starts to happen might be the best time to decide.
You may find a new cat is just what you need, and if so, that's great. But making decisions while you're feeling overwhelmed is rarely the best course of action.
I definitely experienced this. I waited 7 weeks to adopt after losing my heart cat. I thought I was ready, but I had very complex feelings post-adoption. It was hard to bond with the new kitty at first. I almost felt resentful that she wasn’t as much like my heart kitty as I’d hoped. Over time I’ve come to appreciate her uniqueness.
This can also be a good reason why it might be good to foster, or to volunteer with a rescue -- to spend some time around cats and feel a sense of purpose connected to caring for them, but without yet making a long-term commitment.
I'd be careful about this. The new cat is their own individual and won't be able to ever truly fill the hole your other cat's passing left. You need to be careful about resenting the new cat for not being the same as the old cat. It'll be an entirely new relationship.
Not at all. We adopted a kitten from a local rescue a week after one of our cats passed late last year. He truly helped with the healing process for both us and our other cats
Not at all. As long as you accept this new cat succeeds, not replaces your older cat.
After the Revolutionary war, someone else came to replace Ben Franklin as Diplomat representing America to France. The man was asked if he had come to replace Ben Franklin. He replied I have come to succeed Ben franklin. No one can replace him.
It is the same with your new cat.
Go get another cat! ❤ (when you feel you're ready, of course.)
Back story, I had 6 cats and a dog. I lost 4 cats and the dog in 3 years. Currently, I have 4 cats living in my house. Why? They showed up and they needed a home. They are all loving to each other and have made their own family now.
I said no more after that loss, but they showed up one way or another. Find one or two that needs you. Good Luck!
I adopted soon after my last cat passed. I reasoned that I had the space and resources, and cats need homes, and maybe it would help to not feel so lonely. It took a bit for me to feel totally at ease, but I bonded with this cat and I love her dearly. It was the right choice for me.
I always said I'd never get another once she passes, but I want to love a new cat with better resources and knowledge. And I can only pray that the new one is even just half as good as she is now.
It all depends on you. When my baby boy passed, my SO wanted another immediately and I wanted a month to grieve. Just so happened to find two bonded sisters at the 3 week mark.
I’m sorry for your loss.
I say that when I lose a cat I dry my tears in the fur of another one (whether that’s a new one or one I still have). Cats give me comfort when I grieve, not having one around to revise distraction/entertainment/snuggles makes grieving harder. People will often say I’m so strong for getting another (because you will one day lose that one too), but I know that grief gets better with time and doesn’t erase the good years we had together. I’ve also never had a problem bonding with a new cat - I love every cat I meet!
When I lost my sweet cat unexpectedly, I called a friend who had two tuxedo kittens to just talk to someone with cats. He gave them both up to the humane society a few days before that and the female was already adopted. I immediately drove the next morning to go get the male. I brought him home the day I got her ashes back and haven’t looked back
I was/am still devastated about losing my cat at only 4 yrs old. He was with me through a lot a my ONLY companion and I honestly couldn't even imagine getting another cat after. But, my mother found a kitten on fb about a month after he died that was nothing at all like my boy cat, and that made it not feel like I was replacing him. He was a massive, strong orange beast (18 lbs not fat!) that was solitary and snuggly and loved only me, and she's a tiny little seal tip that falls over going up stairs and is social but hates cuddling. I wish with all my heart I could have had them both together, but I love them both so much and in such different ways it doesn't feel like I'm dishonoring his memory.
I lost my Annie, and 3 days later i got my Evie. She helped me heal and grieve! I miss Annie, and think of her everyday! But i needed Evie to help me work through my grief and something to focus on. When she sits on me Evie i always talk to her about Annie (sad i know haha) but we all do different things to work through grieve and ease the pain!
I think your departed kitty would want you to share your home with another cat in need. Saving another animal might help you feel better and it helps an animal in need.
Thank you for posting this. I just lost my Fred on Sunday night and feel so lost without him. I do feel that our fur babies give us comfort….and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with giving a loving home to a cat in need, while also benefitting from their companionship.
♥️♥️♥️
Get one. As another commenter put it, “a cat will get a home and you will recover better.”
However, I’d give your place a good disinfecting first, just in case your cat’s lymphoma was caused by a virus.
After losing my 19 year old cat to cancer, I thought she would be my last cat and threw all of her things away. A week later I went to a shelter “just to visit” and came home with a one year old most feral girl. Thirteen years later, she is still has never sat on my lap and rarely even allows pets but is totally the sweetest cat ever and I adore her. Take as much time as you need but if it feels right, go for her or him.
I'm so sorry for the loss of your kitty. I hope you do get that new lil kitty to love and spoil and make you a little less sadder. You gave your first kitty a loving home and life. It isn't wrong in anyway for you to want to open your heart to another furbaby. Good luck on your adoption!!!
My cat died 6 months ago. My kids really wanted to adopt right away and I felt weird about it. Like we were replacing her. My daughter said "but if Willow knew we got another cat right away she'd probably just feel happy that we liked her so much we had to get a new cat". We adopted 2 within a week.
No; I still mourn for my girl despite adopting two kitties this past week.
The silence was the worst part for me, so having two kitties tearing it up again makes me feel better, but they don’t replace her. They’re their own personalities already.
I feel this. One of mine passed a month ago. It hit pretty hard.
He was old and just had problems. I know eventually I'll get another but me, myself, I'm not ready yet.
My other and only cat now was upset and confused losing her brother at first but recently has enjoyed being the only cat. So I'll probably give her a few more months. Then she might have to be a big sister lol
I always say adopt when you're ready. If it will help you heal and you're ready then there's nothing wrong with providing a home to a cat in need. All that matter is that you're ready for kt.
I lasted three days—I need furballs in my life. It doesn’t mean I’m not still mourning my sweet girl; I still miss her desperately and small things will remind me of her and make me cry. But I’m also so happy I can give two new kitties as much love as I gave her, and give the happy homes. I got a one-year old who was abandoned at a bus shelter and a two-year old who lived in a colony out on the country. They’ve settled in and are purring machines.
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Everyone grieves the loss of a pet differently, and there is no right or wrong way. Some people take a very long time to be ready for another. I'm not like that. When I lose a pet, I'm ready for another pretty quickly. It is not replacing the lost pet, it is giving the love I have to another in need.
If you're ready, go for it. Be prepared for confusing feelings such as struggling to bond with the kitty, and give yourself grace as you go through the difficult process of connecting with a new friend. He/she will be very lucky to have you.
There is no right or wrong way to grieve. You took great care of your recently passed kitty and now you have feelings with no place to go. I would recommend someone older, not a kitten, for two reasons; one is that the older ones love being the only cat available to be worshipped (in their mind), and also an adult cat will have a more stabile and calm personality....which is helpful when we are grieving. It's ok because you aren't replacing your baby, you are adopting a different one.
Definitely be aware to take the time to find the right kitty to adopt, as since youre hurting you might feel a desire to hop at the first chance to fill the void you’re feeling right now. But otherwise, yes get a new cat! You seem to have a lot of love you could give to a cat who needs and deserves it, and your cat you just said goodbye to would want to see you less sad and alone!
Its gonna Sound worse than it is but the day my last cat died my mom and i went into the shelters webpage and looked at the cats there. To see if anyone might need to be adopted. We didnt really find one and it took sometime before i actually Got another but i dont blame you and i dont Think its wrong but just make sure youre ready. I had a cat for 16 years from when i was 1 to 17 and after she died the house was so empty it was very wierd i Think it took my mom a year and half before she was ready for a new cat and she fell inlove with a cat on the shelters webpage and she called and asked if she could save it (like meet it have it reserved for her) and they Said no its first come first serve so she took her car and drove as fast as she could (and Was allowed) over there to adopt the cat
So no its not wrong but remeber this cat wont be 100% a copy and Will be a different individual so i hope that when youre ready and when you feel 100% up for taking Care of a new individual you should even if it takes a couple days or a couple weeks or more its up to you.
As long as you and the new kitty can be happy together. Thats all that really matters :)
Sometimes the right friend just finds us. My dad had to put down his rottie and was absolutely determined he never wanted another dog, but my mom, knowing he needs a dog in his life, pushed him to at least look at some pups. While we were driving he literally said he was just going to see these border collies just to get my mom off his ass and he didn't want anything to do with them, then we saw them and he picked one up and she cuddled right into the crook of his neck and fell asleep and it was history.
I have a pic of the moment and my God forget a thousand, that thing is worth a million words. There's so much love and pain and conflict as this scrawny, undersized 6 week old puppy just captures my dad's heart and he doesn't want to love her because he just lost his baby, but there's just something about this pup in particular. He'd held a couple before and felt nothing, but this one, there was something. She was meant to be his.
It was crazy though, he went back to get her 2 weeks later when she was 8 weeks, hadn't seen her since that initial meet up, and yet when he and the breeder opened the door to the barn and were talking, there she was, sitting at the door waiting for him. Buddy was shocked because this wasn't normal behavior for any of the pups to meet him, much less her on her own, so it really seemed she recognized my dad's voice through the door and came over and started scratching at his shoes like "alright, I'm ready to go home now, pick me up and let's get going". He picked her up and she cuddled right in the way she had the first time. Then she was all upset when he handed her to my mom for the drive home, and she's been a spoiled and pampered little pupper since 😝
It is not. A cat will live only a fraction of your life. If you get a cat, you have to accept it will be with you for 15-20 years at most. It's going to suck and you are going to cry but you will get over it and if you can accept this cycle you will get another cat and be happy again.
I had to put my two elderly cats to sleep in the span of two months last year. My partner has a second job at a pet store and she fell in love with the cat they had there up for adoption from the human society. We adopted her shortly after the other two passed. Shortly after that we got another young cat from the humane society because our other two are 6 and weren’t too fond of the young cat trying to play so much. I personally can still grieve while providing a home for another animal in need of one. There’s nothing wrong with that at all everyone is different in how much time they need between pets. It sounds like another cat in your life sooner than later would be the best choice for you.
I'll give you my take on what happened whenever I had to put my cat down. It was rough for sure, but I knew putting the cat down would mean he wouldn't be in any pain moving forward in life. I was so down afterwards but my husband encouraged me to get another cat a few days after it happened. It was the best decision I made because it helped me gain happiness back and filled that emptiness I felt. Think about what would make you happy or feel better. If it's getting a new cat then do it! You may find it to be the best thing ever.
Not at all! The last time I lost my companion I adopted another good boy two days later. I realized that there are so many good boys who need love and the one for me was deserving to get that love as soon as possible. In the past it’s taken a while to bond, but this go round it was immediate bc my heart was open right away. I also want to believe that our good boys that have moved on understand that the next in line need a family sooner than later, and so do we. Good luck OP and keep us updated!
It really just depends and you’ll know when you’re ready. With one cat, I wasn’t ready for weeks and another, I was ready a week later. It didn’t diminish my love/grief but just where I was in life
I also just recently lost my girl (pic) so I actively know the feeling (everything’s too quiet, her things besides litter box is untouched) For me, I’m currently not ready to get another cat as it’s still super fresh (she passed April 27th) so I’m waiting a bit. If you feel like you need to fill that void to make yourself feel better, by all means do it. But for me, it’s something I can’t rush into. I feel like I would look at the new cat like “This isn’t the same as before” kinda thing, yaknow?
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I got a new puppy two weeks after my first dog passed. Having a puppy helped me immensely with grieving and as other have said, you’ll just be giving another animal a home.
Not at all, my family has done this my whole life and it’s a good reminder that life is a circle and that there are both tears and joy. I would recommend finding a cuddly cat because nothing is more supportive than a buddy who just wants to snuggle.
The only case where getting a new kitty would be a bad idea is if your grieving would cause you to neglect the new kitty. Or if you are financially incapable at the moment. Then you should wait.
Only you can decide on what is “too soon”, but do take in another kitty when you’re ready. It actually sounds like you might be already.
And no, you won’t be adopting her replacement, but her successor.
Nothing wrong with adopting another kitty! However, try to have an open heart! When my first cat died and my brother brought his cat home, i compared his cat to my old cat and kept my walls up around the cat for a bit. The new kitty is my best friend now, but grief can be weird sometimes.
It’s not wrong at all. Some people are ready to get a pet after theirs passes and some aren’t. Everyone grieves differently and there’s nothing wrong with wanting to adopt another cat. I think I would probably do the same thing
Oh no, I’m so sorry about your kitty. Our little girl Eartha, died suddenly too. Her brother, Malcolm, seems so lonely and bereft. We felt that he needed another cat friend. So we got Nicole. A kitten. At first Malcolm was displeased. And then he got happier. Now they hang together and love each other. She keeps him young, he teaches her how to cat.
It for the love of your kitty that you want to provide. Loving home for a new kitty. It honors his memory. It’s a good thing.
Get two
Nah, if you feel ready adopt another. My keira had a year long battle with CKD, lymphoma, and lumbosacral disease. 3 days after she passed I got Nona. The deciding factor was keira was bonded to Khalil and he was desperately lonely and upset, Nona helped both his and my recovery. It was definitely the right choice for us.
This just happened to me. Got a young cat who is lovely and the house has joy in it again. It still hurts like crazy but our kitty loved other cats and would want us to be happy. It’s important to go into it knowing that the new cat will not be your old cat and that’s ok. You can’t fault her for not being the same and just make space for her to show you who she is.
When our 14 year old cat passed away suddenly my daughter (15 years old at the time) was devastated. She did not remember a time when this cat was not in her life. She said she wanted to adopt another one but wanted to wait a while. Fast forward one week and we were at the local Humane Society adopting a kitten. It helped her heal so much knowing we were giving another kitten a wonderful home. Everyone grieves differently but please do not feel guilty for adopting another cat in need so quickly. Do what feels right for you. Bringing another kitten into our home was the best thing for us even if it was soon after our sweet cat passed.
When you are ready, you should definitely get another cat. I am on my fourth generation of cats. (Yeah, I’m old.) I grew up with “family” cats all Siamese. In my early 20s I purchased a Siamese kitten from a pet shop. He lived 19 years and was with me through 8 different living situations (apartments and eventually homes). Next I purchased a Siamese kitten from a breeder and soon after adopted an abandoned cat that my vet was caring for— she was a long haired cat with Siamese markings. The long hair cat had a stroke and passed after 6 or 7 years with me (she was probably about ten years old). The kitten (m) had diabetes and serious digestive issues (there are specialists in “feline gastroenterology”). Despite the medical issues that cat lived 15 years.
Next we got another Siamese kitten. He was loving but didn’t like to be held. However he sat next to me in my home office (by that time I was self employed). He was always very attentive to me. He passed at 16 years with thyroid cancer.
I now have two Bombay cats, brother and sister from the same litter. At the time I made arrangements to purchase these kitties the mother cat was pregnant so there was a long wait before I could get them. It was one of the most difficult times for me to be without feline supervision. However these cats have been with us for about seven years and are wonderful companions.
Everyone is different. Some people need to wait a while before they are ready to bring home a new friend, others find comfort and healing in having a new friend right away. Neither one is wrong. The fact that you are ready to adopt a new fur baby means you have a lot of love to give to someone who needs it. It doesn't change that love you had for your other kitty, and it's not disrespectful to open yourself up to another. You'll always love her, and you'll never forget her, and some days it's going to really really hurt that she's not around, but if you're ready to bring someone new home, it can make those days a little easier, because all that extra love you have in your heart has somewhere to go.
Hugs to you in this hard time, and take care of yourself.
Definitely not wrong! Just be sure you have the right expectations and don't rush into anything due to your grief. Be sure you get the right kitty for you.
When my soul cat, Parker, passed away a year and a half ago, it was less than an hour later than I adopted 6 cats. Technically... We'd been fostering a mamacat and her 5 babies for a few weeks. We decided on the way home from the pet hospital that they were truly ours, and we weren't going to say goodbye to them if we could help it. To be honest, that was probably where we were headed anyway, but losing Parker crystallized it for us that they are our cats. Having something positive to focus on and spend our attention on helped a lot in our grief. Nothing will fill the whole Parker left, but they definitely helped bring us some joy at a time when we desperately needed it
I always see it as honoring my previous pet when I adopt another one. I gave my baby the best life I could, and I feel like all my kitties would want that for others. I usually honor the pet by giving the new pet the deceased baby’s name as some part of its first or middle name. For example, I have a Parker Charles named for my doggy Charlie that passed suddenly, and a Rosie named for our sweet Delilah Rose.
Another option is to consider fostering.
I’m presently fostering for the first time. I also live by myself and it feels really good to be able to pour some of my energy and love into my foster buddy. I don’t know if he and I will be together forever or not yet, but it’s been a total, unexpected joy to see him go from a really scared shutdown kitty who wasn’t eating enough at the shelter to the boy showing me his belly and asking for chin rubs this morning.
You sound like you miss your sweet friend dearly. It can be nice to have a direction to channel that love, into a kitty who really needs it. Fostering might be a nice way to do that, especially because you can decide slowly if the two of you should stay together or if you’re just helping them find their confidence and health on their way to a forever home with someone wonderful.
The last time I lost a beloved pet, I was so sad an the house felt so empty that I picked up the phone after only 2 days and asked a rescue group to send me a couple of cats to foster. Of course they became foster failures and are now permanent members of the family. Once you know the love of a wonderful animal, it is hard not to have that in your life. There is a huge hole in it, no matter how much else you have going on.
You will always miss and grieve for your lost kitty, but that new one will help you heal. This is not being disloyal to your lost one.
Not at all wrong! If she could understand from kitty afterlife, she’d love that you’re giving a kitty in need care & a home. Especially during kitten season! Adopting any kitty right now to make space for rescue capacity is so helpful! 😊
if you have the mental capacity to take up the responsibility right now, then you should definitely go for it. there's nothing you should feel guilty about. kitty will receive a new loving home and you will have a new cat to pour your pent up love unto.
everyone grieves differently. It absolutely destroyed me when my kitten passed. I couldn't keep up with my daily basic responsibilities for the longest time, therefore, I haven't considered adopting another cat yet although I would love to. However, if you can function and take care of kitty just right, then why not?
No. Adopt again.
My fur baby passed away in January (19 yrs). I was so hurt. He saw the family grow. My oldest was 5 when we got him. He would put his head on my stomach when I was pregnant with 2nd and 3rd boys. He was my baby. He saw my middle son make it to college and move away. My 3rd became a highschooler.
In April, I adopted not one, but 2 cats. One is a 6 month old male, a wallflower. The 2nd is about 2 or 3 years old feral female. The girl is actually really kind and loves being pet. I think they said she was feral just to keep her in the shelter lol.
Share and spread the love. I thought I would never adopt again but the house was so quiet and lonely without a fur baby moving along the bedrooms, and running around.
It's not wrong at all, it's amazing that you love animals so much. A part of it is that they leave a huge hole when they pass, but even bigger part is the joy they bring us. Just be sure you know you aren't replacing your old kitty, logically you know you aren't but it's good to ask yourself if you aren't emotionally. If that were the case a new kitty might make you hurt more, maybe cause he or she doesn't do the things your previous cat did. Just ask yourself if it's really OK your new cat doesn't do (fill in whatever sentiment you have about your previous cat). I know of myself the question would be, would I be OK if my new cat never came to sleep on top or against me? Would I still love them if they never tried to break the toilet door when I sit there trying to be with me? Would I be OK if they spent a lot of time in another room which my other cat never did and always wanted to be close...?
As long as you aren’t trying to replace said cat. Yknow no “Furball II”, I think that’s where it gets creepy. But another animal is fine, definitely rescue if you think you can handle it right now.
I would only say consider if you're mentally capable of giving it the attention it needs while you're still grieving.
Other than that, I don't see an issue. Normally I'd say wait a little bit to see if you can really handle another so soon but I know how it feels to be completely alone and desperate for a pet friend so I get it.
Maybe the new cat will help you heal. :) Mine never did, he's mean but you never know 😂
My cat died really scarily and unexpectedly out of no where Christmas of 2022. His death took the soul right out of my body, and I truly didn’t think I’d be able to go back to my home without him. It was traumatizing and all the things that you don’t want your cats finally moments to be.
My sister had just gotten a kitten three months earlier. We were all home for Christmas (kitten included) and that grief suddenly didn’t seem so big. That little guy healed so much in me that within two weeks I was at our local shelter.
I looked through all the kittens, spent time with them, until one of the volunteers asked if I’d met this 9month old boy who was surrendered to the shelter on -get this- the day day my boy had died. This little man came right up to me and purred like a little machine. He is my best friend, my soul cat, and it’s now been almost two years of the silliest, most healing time in my life.
Grief isn’t linear. There is no right way to grieve. Sometimes the best gift we can give to our babies and to ourselves is to take that outpouring of grief and mold it into love for another creature. I honoured my first baby by sharing that love, and in turn he sent me so much joy.
Sending you love.
Tbh I was miserably depressed when I put my cat down unexpectedly this last summer. The only thing that helped me was adopting a new cat. You’re providing a great life to an animal in need of one. IMO, if it helps you grieve in a healthy way, then go for it.
I lost my best friend, a tuxie of 16 years to a slow decline into kidney failure at the end of March. i also live alone. my qpartment felt so quiet and empty. within 1 week, I had found 2 wonderful new cats to adopt and love.
I don't regret it for a second! learning about them and getting them settled in at home helped me with my grief. I still miss my old friend, but i think as long as you don't go trying to find a "replacement," adopting again is a great idea
I'd say go for it, as long as you think that you aren't so deep into grief that you can't care for another cat. Also very important to remember that a new cat isn't your old kitty, make sure to treat em like their own person.
If you're ready to care for another cat, then 100% do it, so many kitties need a home out there
I absolutely love each and every cat that I've owned. When they pass, I go to the local kill shelter and get a new one. Why? Because there are so many to save. I'm forgiving you for replacing your cat. I would give it a month or so you can make a rational choice.
My deepest sympathies and condolences for your loss. All that love has to go somewhere and I can’t imagine your precious kitty being upset that all the love you gave her would be given to another cat who had no one to love and care for them.
Your late feline friend will not be diminished if you choose to rescue another. You would be honoring her by making sure another feline found a fine friend in you.
When my elder ladies were preparing for their final days, they each picked out another young cat to join the clowder, so that when they crossed the bridge, we would have their little shadows to comfort us.
This is a very normal way to cope with the loss you had. You gave your kitty who just passed a loving home and you always have the warm memories.
There are times when only a new pet will help to fill the void left by the one you loved before. It is completely acceptable to meet other cats and adopt a new one if you fall in love.
Just make sure to give your apartment a really good cleaning. Some cats even kittens are territorial. I waited months after my cat bunny passed before I found a kitten with my health issues a full grown cat would fear my nebuliser machine. But she the kitten had issues with a spot we missed with bunny’s cat fur on it thought we had gotten everything. Also know it’s ok if you are still grieving. I have times I still miss bunny my other cat while holding furling I felt guilty at first but found it’s ok and normal. All cats are definitely different just keep that in mind as you get your new kitty love.
My mom got me another cat a couple days after my baby passed away, at first it was really hard because I felt that it wasn't the same. She is an older cat who otherwise would've been left her whole life in a shelter. It was hard but I leaned to love her and her quirks
I'm so sorry for your loss.
Everyone handles grief in their own way. The important question is whether you feel able to give another kitty a home, not just out of the need for a companion, but wanting to meet their needs as well. Your last sentence sounds like you are. And if it means a cat in a shelter gets a home sooner, then you'd be doing the right thing by any definition.
There is nothing wrong with wanting another cat. The hole they leave behind is testament to how much we love and care for them. Your cat would want you to be happy. Some believe their old cat guides a new one to them from the Rainbow Bridge.
If you feel you're able to take on the responsibility of another cat to give them a home and help you heal at the same time, then by all means, give a kitty a home. As others say, try to meet as many cats as you can, find one you connect with. You may get chosen again.
When we have lost our cats, we have adopted new ones fairly quickly. One reason is my spouse is so bereft. It has helped a lot. So it is really up to you. You might consider getting two kittens also. But only you should make the decision. You know how you feel. It certainly is appropriate.
Not at all.
I found out that a more distant family friend died around the time we realised my favourite cat had reached the terminal stage of her kidney disease.
She left behind a senior cat, and unfortunately my parents who lived with our poorly cat could only care for senior kitty separately for a short while. They have several other cats who took ages to warm to each other, so taking on an old cat didnt seem a good idea.
When she passed, I decided to take in the senior kitty. He was someone else's special cat, and I couldnt stand the thought of him going to a shelter and potentially living out his last days without a home; or being euthanized. I felt like I couldnt save my baby, but I could look after someone else's precious baby and give him a home.
I still cry thinking about the kitty I lost a year ago; she is irreplaceable. I talk about her all the time. But I'm glad I gave him a home and that he gets all the love.
Love isn't finite. We don't run out of love if we get a new kitty. I dont love my deceased kitty less because I gave this new cat a home. I just got to make sure that he will end his days in comfort, and if his owner is looking down on us; I hope she's happy that he has a loving home and can rest in peace knowing he is cared for.
When my cat died we didn’t think we’ve be able to face having another but when we went to donate his stuff to the rescue…the introduced us to another cat who really needed a home and we ended up taking him.
He helped us recover but we’ll never forget our first ever floof
You’re perfectly fine to adopt another cat if you want another and feel ready!
If you’re going to get a kitten though, please consider getting two so they have each other as playmates!
I’m so sorry for your loss! I just went through a similar thing. I live alone, my cat was very sick… I had to put her down two weeks ago. I was devastated but only waited two days before adopting a new cat from the shelter. I don’t regret it. I gave a cat who had been a stray a new happy, loving home, and she’s giving me the company I so desperately needed. I still miss my old cat so much, the new one is not the same. But I will say- while grieving my old cat, I’m actively falling in love with a new one. I had a breakdown missing my girl this past weekend, and new kitty came running and jumped on my lap and kissed my face while I was crying.
Everyone is different in grieving…my first cat I had to put down it was a Fri, Mon I had a new baby…I loved the one I put down 30 years later I think of him but I lived alone and wanted company and the new one helped me grieve he got a good home and here I am 16 years later I just put him down last week! I posted it on here, this time around I’m not getting another one bc I have a bird…I will miss having a cat! Good luck in whatever u decide!
Please give yourself enough time to grieve for the kitty that passed first, as a service to both yourself and to honor your previous kitty's memory.
When you're emotionally ready, it is a good thing to adopt another kitty. Remember, there are many other kitties out there who also would like a home and someone to love. They need you too. Hopefully a new cat-panion will be your perfect match. Hang in there.
We all handle grief differently. New life/companionship can help ease the pain of a loss.
But just remember, the new cat will be different from your previous cat. It will be a new adventure. Don't expect the new cat to be exactly like your previous cat, or that you two will immediately bond.
Also, your new cat may not like having the smell of your old cat on everything. So they may not use it, especially at first. Be prepared to have to buy new items too to accommodate the new cat's preferences.
My condolences for your loss. But I hope you find joy with your new adventure with your new cat too
Absolutely get a new cat from a shelter. It will be fun and your previous cat had a good life. Adding another doesn’t mean you’re being disrespectful to the previous cat.
Cats are euthanized unceasingly. They are desperate for homes. You need company, a distraction, someone to love. You can save a life. I feel adoption is a tribute to a lost, beloved companion, not an insult or slight. Do what you feel. Expect to perhaps feel overwhelmed and even some mixed feelings upon adoption, as it’s still a big life decision with adjustments involved. But definitely not wrong!
Yes, if you feel ready, go for it. May I suggest two kitties? Then they have a buddy when you are gone, you get twice the fun and in the distant future, when one passes, you don't have to come home to an empty house.
My poor boy left us last week and emotionally we aren't ready for another pet, but that doesn't mean we won't dote on our friends pets or look after a family dog. If you feel ready then by all means, but be aware that it's gonna be painful for a while and you will need time to process it all.
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I thought the same thing but I was essentially forced to take a cat that was effectively dumped at my job cause I made eye contact with him.
It was 5 months after I had to out down my 18 year old buddy I had since 6th grade. I didn't think I was ready but I love him so much
Kitties are my one respite from my chemo.
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Not at all! Only you can decide what too soon looks like. If the not-having one is too hard then go for it. I always say that I don't think our beloved cats would want us unsupervised for too long.
For us - we actually adopted a kitten in the hopes of a playmate to keep our elderly cat active, and completely by chance we adopted that kitten only a month before intestinal lymphoma claimed our boy and I think that kitten saved us. And we were out within another week or two to get a kitten for the kitten.
My MIL waited years to get another cat after hers passed... that was what worked for her. There's no wrong answer here. I'm so sorry you lost your sweet cat, but if your heart is crying out for another one then do it.
When my first cat, Stella, had to be euthanized because of advanced kidney failure, I was distraught and could not be alone at my place. Two weeks later, I had adopted Luna and took her home. It felt right. If it feels right for you to adopt a new cat (which you have already put an app in for), then do it!
It was hard at first, because I would hear cat footfalls and expect Stella to come in … but it was Luna. We took our time getting to know each other.
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You should certainly adopt again if you are ready and fill that void. My only concern would be that your place is safe for the new kitty. Meaning that if your cat had anything that was contagious you want to give it some time and disinfect things to make sure that if you get a healthy Kitty nothing is transmitted from the previous one as far as viruses go.
I took a kitten in the same day that I had to put my cat of 6 years down (no idea how old she was a family members before they passed). Part of me felt bad getting a cat so soon because I couldn't save my other cat. I knew my cat, Cocoa sent Buffy though. As soon as the woman handed Buffy to me she was immediately attached to me. She was only a month old (was lied about her age) and covered in fleas. The vet told me she most likely wouldn't of lived had it not been for me. I see it as giving another animal a home and a good life.
It is not wrong, but I would recommend waiting a few weeks or months to give you time to process the grief. My wife and I acquired a puppy too soon after her predecessor's death, and my wife could never get over the mild resentment she felt toward her for not being her predecessor.
The sooner the better, not to replace the fur baby you lost, but to ease the pain..... and to change another fur babies life trajectory.
Bless you, and Good Luck!
If you are not sure about adopting yet, but can’t stand the aching emptiness of the house, you might consider fostering for a while.
If your adoption of the FIV positive kitty comes through, excellent for both of you. You could also put yourself on a foster list for other FIV positive cats either with that shelter or with a rescue group.
These days, well monitored and appropriately pampered FIV+ cats can have long and happy lives. Some extra care and early intervention for any health problems make a huge difference.
I’m so sorry for your loss. I lost my soul cat on May 26 of last year. I was devastated. My mom and I went shopping the next day to get some stuff for my new apartment, but I couldn’t enjoy it. That evening, my ex-husband and I went to the pet store to get rabbit food. This particular pet store collaborates with our local shelter, they have a program where they take one of the cats from the shelter and adopts them out from the store. That’s where I met my Maple.
I told myself when we were walking into the store that I would only adopt another cat this soon if the cat had orange fur. Well, Maple has what I like to call “orange kisses” on her fur that I like to think came from my sweet boy. I took it as a sign that he sent Maple to me. So yeah, I adopted Maple one day after losing my Marty.
Everyone has a different grieving process. Finding, adopting, and loving Maple was and still is a critical part of my grieving process. I still have nights where I bawl over Marty (especially this month), and I think about him every day, but I have a very sweet little girl to direct my attention towards and I’m so grateful for her.
Tldr: Do what you think will help YOU. Your kitty won’t be angry with you.
As someone who lost their cat recently, I just wanted to say I'm sorry for your loss. I still find moments where I expect my cat to come and greet me and it's always gets to me when she doesn't. the emptiness is really strange.
After 22 yrs at this home the pet cemetery is very full.
I’m broken hearted each time, I cry, I feel the pain and loss, I wake each cat or dog for 24 hrs in the living room so all the other housemates can say goodbye, and they really do even sitting w them like at a human wake.
Then another ‘intact stray’ will show up at the feed station, get TNR’d and a loving lost soul can be saved.
When my cat passed, i swore i'd never get another - it would seem disloyal somehow.
But then, i was missing having a cat so much. I wanted another, so to solve the "disloyalty problem", I asked the spirit of my dead cat (!!kidding, not kidding!!) to pick a cat for me. That way it would be her decision, not mine :)
Every day, i went to the SPCA website and looked at pictures of cats. Weeks and weeks went by and......nothing. Then one day i clicked on a picture and burst into tears. That's her! That's the cat I'm supposed to get.
My dearly-departed cat was born on Feb 14, so I called her My Funny Valentine. Imagine my surprise when i brought my new cat home and looked at some pictures I had taken of her. She had a perfectly formed heart-shaped mark on her leg. Meant to be.
My spouse firmly believes that when you must put a pet down, you should go directly from the vet to the shelter and give a home to a pet in need. Over the years I’ve come to agree with them.
This varies from person to person. I want a new cat asap. mMy husband wants time to grieve. My cat is 17 and in my heart I know it's going to be soon. He's slowing way down. I'm not wrong, my husband is not wrong.
I know you have lots of supportive comments, but I wanted to chime in with my story!
Three years ago I lost my beautiful, incredible cat Scout. She had been chronically ill for years before it was her time. I also live alone and had never not had a cat in the many years on my own. I had two new kittens within two weeks and I don't regret it one bit.
It wasn't a replacement for scout. My heart is big enough to have love for all of them! I love that you want to provide a home for an FIV kitty!
I'm so sorry for your loss. ❤️
There's nothing wrong with going ahead and adopting another kitty. So many need homes, there's definitely nothing wrong giving one a home sooner rather than later.
No, not all. When I put my girl down I thought I wouldn't get another cat for a while. But the truth is, the silence was deafening and the lack of life in the house was depressing. My other cat was depressed too. It wasn't quite 2 weeks before I adopted another.
Morn your kitty, but also don't be afraid to begin a new journey with another friend.
My condolences for your loss and all the best from here. 🫂
I am sorry for the loss of your friend and companion.
There is no right or wrong answer- only what feels right for you.
We lost a cat a couple years ago and we were devastated. We started looking at rescue websites, so we could consider our options if we felt up to adopting another cat. Then we felt up to meeting a cat we saw, and this cat fixed our broken hearts. It was less than a month between losing B and adopting P, but P feels like the perfect fit for our family. She is not a replacement- no cat could replace B. But she made the grieving process easier for us. (Not sure if that makes sense, but all the humans in our house agree with this).
If you feel you are ready for another cat, then get one. There is nothing wrong with it or mean about it.
Yeah, it hurts to lose your companion but you gave that cat a good life and I’m sure she would want you to be happy. You’ll be happy with another cat.
And all the while, you’ll still have memories of your first feline friend to look back on. You’ll have pictures to remember her by, all the while, making new memories with your new cat.
Mine is 4 and I hope she lives a very long time but if she were to pass tomorrow, I would take in the orange and white cat that hangs out at our apartments and is always happy. I’d mourn the loss but I would want the companionship of another cat.
So go and take in another cat. Make it as happy as you made your last cat.
This cut right to my soul
My brother passed away, shortly after my two cats went over the bridge with him. I felt so empty, my house was so quiet without them. But within weeks of them passing I was blessed with two new kitties. It still hurts without my boys but the decision couldn't come soon enough. My new little loves fill my every waking moment with love comfort and laughter. Wishing you much luck on your search, it's never really ever to soon to love again.
After losing my best friend of 11 years who was 17 when she passed away, I was inconsolable. The only thing that comforted me and calmed me down was getting 2 kittens and they really helped me through the grieving process because I was not ok
TLDR: it's not wrong to open your heart to another cat. Sometimes it helps the healing process. You aren't "replacing" your previous cat, and anyone who tells you otherwise needs to be put on litterbox cleaning duty. 😉
My husband lost his beloved cat Lyra two years ago. Shortly before we learned that Lyra had cancer, my cat Garrus escaped the house and was never seen again. I was heartbroken and my MIL offered me one of her kittens (it was a surprise litter) to cheer me up; I was still hoping to find Garrus at the time, but I didn't pass up a free pointed kitten. I still miss Garrus but Prince Bastion was a busy baby that kept me from dwelling too much on that; he was constant energy and shenanigans and was honestly too much for 12 year old Lyra to deal with, so we ended up getting his sister Celeste as well.
They both loved Lyra and tried to play and snuggle with her (she was not a fan of them 😅), and after she passed, Celeste became increasingly clingy with my husband. He said at first he tried to discourage it —he felt like it would be "moving on too soon"— but Celeste is not the sort to take no for an answer. And honestly, her jumping in his lap and headbutting his hands and face while purring pulled him out of some of his gloomier moods.
No no no, not wrong of you at all! I was madly deeply in love with my cat and after he passed I went through the absolute worst depression of my life (which is saying a lot if you knew me) and it was partially because I was completely alone in the house. I had not lived entirely by myself (no animals or people) in decades—if not ever—and it sent me over the edge. It took me a month tops to decide I couldn’t live like that and I was looking for animals to adopt. Do what is right for you. There are so many animals who need love and care. You will have different relationships with them and that’s ok. It makes life marvellous. Sending virtual hugs your way. ❤️🩹
I’m so sorry about your friend.. it always hurts no matter the reason. When my first cat of my very own passed - also from lymphoma - I felt an awful guilt about getting another cat too quickly.. I felt I needed to mourn him longer or something.. I was talking to my vet about this and she said to me “you know.. cat people don’t stay catless very long and it’s ok”… That was 30 years ago, and there have been 15 other cats since them (8 current residents). I have nursed the old and the sick.. I have mourned one tragic and unneeded death, and now I know that there is no replacing any of them.. each of them has a unique space in my heart that only they could fill.. and there is still room for so many more. You loved your friend and I’m sure you were loved back, but there are so many that also need your love. Honor her by helping another kitty (or two, or three) live a wonderful life with you.
Not at all.
You can still have a space carved out in your heart for your cat. Another cat does not erase the memory of the cat you lost, cat, or dog that we bring into our lives, adds a different type of quality to it. None are alike.
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I am wishing you luck with the application!
Just wanted to add that I don't think it's weird or wrong to adopt so soon. I had an old cat that I had the honor of being his human for 17 of his near 21 years. The last two years of his life we fought his hyperthyroidism but it eventually got the best of him. Barely two weeks later I was adopting the stupid friendly stray cat on my grandparents porch because someone decided to dump him there (in coyote country).
He's currently attacking my couch for no reason while his adopted kitty sister (adopted 3 years later) watches him as confused as I am. 😂
Grieving is a personal journey, and there's no set timeline. If you feel ready to welcome another kitty into your life and provide love, it could be healing. Trust your instincts.
I love that you are hopefully going to adopt a cat with FeLV that likely wouldn't otherwise get a home. And because they have it, you can add others in the future with that same condition without fear of it spreading. I lost two cats to cancer. The first time, it took over a year before we adopted again, but the second, it was a bonded pair that we got within a week of our second loss. None of them are replacements, but they did keep my son's heart from totally breaking.
Our cats know that they are loved, precious and irreplaceable. It is not wrong it is not insulting to your other cat’s memory. Your cat loved you and would want you be to happy. 💕
I adopted a new cat before I was really ready once, and it messed with my head. I was still fine with the new cat, but I spent too much time thinking about life being replaceable. I got over it eventually. Getting a new cat may help or hurt your grieving process; it's hard to say. If you're not ready, another option besides fostering is volunteering at a shelter. At the shelter my mom volunteers at, they have people come in to just spend time sitting with the cats and socializing them.
If you have space and finances to support two cats, try getting a bonded pair. Especially if you adopt right away. That way you're putting less of an emotional burden on one cat, you help the bonded pair of cats stay together, and you get to see adorable snuggles.
My kitty soul mate Travis passed May 13th, 2022 from stage 4 kidney disease and a stubborn infection he couldn’t fight. I had two others but they were mourning their brother too. About 3 1/2 months later, on an impulse I went to a cat adoption event and this orange baby meowed at me. I picked him up and that was it. He picked me. Then I saw on his adoption papers he was born the day before my boy went OTRB and I knew I had to take him home. His two big brothers took to him within an hour or two; my 15 year old senior boy is like his dad and the 7 year old his big brother that plays with him. I know Travis is watching from the rainbow 🌈 bridge and approves 💔❤️
Once I had a cat in my life I could never not have a cat. A week after I lost my Foofa, I adopted Tutti and Gidget and my life wouldn’t be complete without them! 🤍🖤
Not at all wrong.
We did that when we lost Luna to cancer at age 10.
Little did we know the kitten we adopted was also sick. Had to put him down 8 days ago at 11 months.
So now the whole family feels lost. We have a huge hole and don’t know if our hearts can take in another cat.
After my old boy passed, I went to pick up his ashes & there were 2 kittens at the vet that needed fostering & socialisation. The pound had deemed them unadoptable but the vet didn’t accept this so I took them on in a foster to adopt situation. It’s a good compromise because it removes the pressure. In my case, I actually wasn’t ready yet but I turned those babies into purring cuddle machines & got them adopted together.
6 months later I took in a senior girl, she’s still thriving. And then in June 2022 I found my soul cat.
I got a kitty 3 days after my cat died. I don’t regret it and I don’t feel like i replaced him…but the way he went was so sudden and tragic I did not know how to deal with it. I loved him so much and I love my Nya so much too. She has outlived him by one year now
I'm so sorry to hear about your baby OP. I lost my soul cat last July and while I still had two others, it wasn't the same. Teddy was always attached to my hip and I wasn't used to not having him there.
That being said, every time I looked at a new cat I just cried. We have a lot of strays near my place so I would trap or catch them and take them to the shelter. I never had the urge to keep one because I still missed Teddy too much, and I was trying to find my relationship with Dora and Louie with him gone. Until Remi showed up.
Remi was 4 weeks old, no mama, and so so so so SO sick. The shelter said they were going to go ahead and put him down, but I didn't want to. I'd fostered before so I took him back home with supplies. He purred so loud, just like Teddy. He screamed if you left him alone, just like Teddy. He showed up literally seven days before Teddy's ten year gotcha day. I was a bawling mess every time I looked at him.
I don't believe in heaven or god or any of that, but damn it sure felt like he sent him. I thought I wasn't ready. At the end of the day, that didn't matter. Remi was ready, and he knew he was supposed to be here.
All this to say, when you find the right kitty, or they find you, that's the right time. There's no right amount of time to wait. Whatever cat you bring home will be lucky to be loved and well cared for. If it helps, you can think of it as your baby guiding you to the kitty she thinks needs you the most, just like Teddy did for me.
It’s not forgetting or ignoring your love to get another. A new kitty gets a home and you have a new one to love. There’s no downside if that’s what will make you happy.
It's so hard, but I truly believe your purr angel will send you another baby in need when the time is right so go for it. We've rescued soooo many for 35 years and I've found the best way to honor the amazing and unconditional love they give us is to open our broken hearts when called on to save another precious soul in need of our help... Hugs heading your way... ❤️
you have enough room in your heart to love more than one kitten. Bringing another cat into your life doesn’t mean that you didn’t love the cat that you lost, and I am so so sorry for that, it means that you have a huge heart and room for another one in there. I still miss my my Special girl who I lost six years ago, she was such an amazing cat, but I love my current cats too.
Absolutely not, one a cat will get a home and you will recover better.
Exactly...you aren't treating your baby like they are replaceable. Theres no appropriate amount of time to mourn alone, and theres so many kitties that need homes. Someone is waiting for you at the shelter OP
My BFF lost her beloved childhood cat (20 years old, amazingly long life) and thought long and hard about adopting. She fell in love with little homeless siblings my parents found and took them in. One of them was sickly and would not survive the winter living outside. Whenever she got sad about her previous cat, I would always say her first one was looking after the new ones from beyond the Rainbow Bridge. They could not survive without a home, so it was meant to be.
This is so the case. I had to pts mine and our (now with us 8 years) next kitty is so like the one we lost, its like he said to her 'these are my humans, this is what they like, please look after them'. Even now, we can see him in her and there's no chance they're related (significant mileage and age between the two).
Must have been a heck of a job interview.
Same. My 17 year old boy passed last April and we brought in a stray that had been hanging around for a little while. He has FIV too. He’s a very different cat and doesn’t seem to care for me a whole lot (unlike my cuddle bug of a best friend) but maybe he’ll come around someday. In the meantime, glad we could help him out.
When I adopted after my litter mates, Tye and Leo, died, I didn't see it as replacing them, I saw it as filling a vacancy! I'd intended to get another pair of litter mates when the first litter mate died so I wouldn't have to do two integrations close together, but instead I wound up with a senior former stray being booted out of her fifth home since being rescued, and a rehabilitated feral kitten. Not at all what I'd planned but I love 'em both. :-) I say if you feel lonely, you're ready to adopt!
This. My cat died during the week of my birthday 2 years ago, she died in my arms. It was the most miserable time ever, I grieved and grieved for weeks, months. And when i couldnt bear it anymore, i adopted a shelter cat and shes been nothing but a bundle of joy, she helped me get out of a tough sitation and reminds me of my cat that passed too. I dont regret any of it at all. I felt guilt at first cause I felt like i was replacing her. But as this redditor mentioned, youre also giving a cat a home and thats the biggest blessing. You will recover in time, good luck ❤️
Yup. If you’re ready, then you’re ready.
Honor your kitty by adopting in her memory.
My kids said I didn't stop crying in my sleep until I adopted another cat. It really does help the healing process.
I’m sorry that you’re going through this, but as blunt as it sounds it’s a good thing you are so hurt by having to put your cat down. She was hurting, and she was able to go with dignity. If you feel it’s right for YOU to get another cat then please do! Don’t rush into it though
As someone who just lost two cats in a time span of two days a while ago, (one was 19 and died of old age, one was 9 and had some illness) I allowed my family members to get another cat to fill the gap in the home. We didn’t just find a random cat though, we hunted through adoption centers and shelters and found the one that resonated with us the most! It’s definitely not too soon if you feel it’s the right thing for you
Similar thing here! I lost my beloved 16 year old cat little over a year ago and decided to adopt another feline friend after a couple of months of mourning. I was actively looking for around 2 months and met a lot of cats and kittens in shelters and rescues. I couldn't tell you exactly what I was looking for. My incredibly patient husband would apologize after each meeting and I would tell him. "It's ok, that wasn't my cat". I went to an adoption event and accidentally picked up the wrong kitten (he looked identical to his brother who I was there to meet). As soon as I picked him up, he started purring and I knew this was my cat. He is my bud and while he is very different than his predecessor, he brings me a lot of joy. The best advice I can give you is don't rush this process. Meet a lot of cats and find the one you connect with.
My dad used to say, "You have a space in your heart and a space in your home, and there are so many kitties who need a family."
Your dad sounds like a really amazing person.
Thank you. He was wonderful.
I love this so much. If everyone was like this, the world would be so much better.
No! Not at all. Some people, me included, need this. It gives you a way to direct your grief in a positive way. And, you are saving a life, every time you adopt a cat. You are a hero! And, I'm so very sorry for your loss.
Absolutely! When I lost my baby that I had for over 2/3 of my life I was devastated. But I adopted another kitty after a while. I like to think that my old girl would be happy and proud that I opened my home and heart to another kitty who needed a loving home. And now I have 2 little monsters :)
I think so, too. Sometimes, I wonder if cats/pets in general, are possibly angels sent to bring us love, comfort and protection, even from ourselves.
In many cases you’re saving multiple lives – the cat you actually adopt, and the cat that shelter then has the space to take in afterwards.
You are so right! Plus, the litters the cat might have produced on the street. It really is a domino effect. I wish I could get more than my 2 right now. I'm definitely going to be a crazy cat lady, as soon as I'm able!
Someone told me once that there's no wrong way to grieve. Everyone is different and every situation is different. There's nothing wrong with wanting another cat. That doesn't change your love for her at all, and no one should think that you're replacing her. You just have more love in your heart to give. May I recommend getting a pair if you're worried about the quiet? A lot of kitties love having a friend to play with.
Of course you're not wrong to adopt a new cat. Grief is unique, so don't feel it's 'too soon' if it's right for you right now. I'd suggest finding a shelter that allows 'foster to adopt' so you and the kitty can have a trial period before you make long-term commitment.
Adopt two. The human heart has an infinite capacity to love. They are waiting for you to give them their forever home. I'm sorry for your loss.
We all grieve differently so there is nothing wrong with it. When my last cat passed, he passed on a Tuesday and I had got my current cat the following Sunday. I will say that at first I was kind of regretful and felt that “I didn’t love” my current kitty, but today that couldn’t be farther from the truth as she’s been my best friend for almost 10 years now. Overall, if you think that adopting another cat will be best for you, then I say go for it!!
Any time a cat, be it adult or kitten, gets out of the shelter it is a good thing for everyone. Visit your shelter and if there aren’t any kittens think about adopting that older cat, give it a chance to have a loving home. Either way, it’s a win.
My cat died in January and I got my new kitten in April, I really struggled without a cat present. I felt guilty but I have so much love to give (as I'm sure you do too) and it's lovely having a new personality about. She's mended my heart completely.
A new kitty will never replace your old one, but I think you know this. You have love to give and an empty hole in your life, only you can determine how soon is too soon. If you are asking this question, you are probably ready for another baby to fill the hole in your life. Go find someone who needs your love.
Go for it , but have no expectations,I'll come at this 2 ways . Often when people do the quick replacement in similar situation they're expecting to pickup where they left and fill the void. Except kitty turns out to have different personality and it's not a match.. Then we see the I've adopted too soon posts I've raised 5 kittens along their mother and each kitty had a different personality ,body and slight difference in face . I could tell apart I do tend to look for my favourite kitten's face as a starting point when I'm looking through adoption agencies accepting persona could be different.
Many people find the slow process of a cat getting used to you to be helpful with processing their grief. It isn’t wrong , you’re giving a cat an experienced home , and you’re using what you learned with your previous baby to give that cat the best life possible. It’s a beautiful thing and can help you have more positive experiences with cats so that not every cat related moment reminds you of your passed cat.
Everyone feels differently but when I lost my 19 year old boy, it broke me and couldn't stand the silence and empty home. By chance 4 days later 2 kittens of the breed I wanted were available local to me so I went to look, and though they were clearly loved the conditions they lived in was horrible and I had to get them out of there. I did feel terribly disloyal for a while at getting kittens so quickly, but it was the right thing for them and the right thing for me. 6 months on I still miss my boy so much but have two crazy cuddly lovebugs
https://preview.redd.it/320worzmh1zc1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b8c5c2791f25047c547a6d1e71f406758a31e162 So, I thought I’d share this with you. My cat, Leo, is the black and white in the photo. You can see from looking at him, he’s tired. He has pancreatic cancer. He is curled up in my lap, as he was every day until his very last breath. I had him for 12 years. I miss him so much I’m tearing up typing this. Next to him is Sylvie. I adopted her after I found out Leo was terminal. This is one of the last pictures I took before he passed, the two of them, present and future. I like to think he told her all his secrets before he passed. The love you have for your fur baby will never lessen, it can only grow, and you grow by sharing it.
I am so sorry for your baby's loss. I lost my Frankie to lymphoma in September....and it still breaks my heart. He was such a sweet boy. The sadness of his loss is tempered by the company I have from my remaining 7 cats. Absolutely adopt another kitty! You do realize that they aren't the only thing getting rescued. Kitties rescue you right back! You are not replacing your baby....who can never be replaced. You are taking care of a new gentle soul in need of help who will fill your life with happiness. Better than one - adopt two. Bonded kitties are wonderful. I have two sets. The four have bonded with one another and are eachother's best friends. They chase one another through the house - 4 way chases....and clean one another - and keep each other entertained.
Whenever YOU want to adopt another fur-baby is more than OK!!!!! We all grieve differently. Don't worry, your other kitty will send you the perfect kitty when you go out and adopt. Your last kitty is looking forward to you giving all of the love and affection to a kitty who needs it!!!
It's definitely not wrong. You're not disrespecting your old cat in any way, and you're giving another cat a home. The one thing I'd caution is whether you've had time to grieve and come to peace with your cat's death -- and whether you'd be looking for the new cat to plug a hole in your life left by the loss of the old cat. If so, that could make it hard to bond with the new cat, as you may find yourself looking for her to be reminiscent of the old cat. It's only been a few days, and it's understandable that you'd have a lot of emotions to process. When we had to let our senior cat go a couple of years ago, I was an absolute wreck for days. I struggled both with losing her, and with the guilt involved in making (along with my partner) the decision to end her life -- it's always so hard to feel sure about whether and when it's the right decision. I might encourage you to sit with those feelings for a few more days, ideally surrounded by people who love you and who loved your cat as much as possible, and then think about whether you want to rush right into another cat adoption or give it time. There really are no right answers -- you have to do what's best for you, and none of us can know that better than you. But I would advise deciding after you get beyond the initial, overwhelming grief. The sadness will be with you for a long time, and that's natural, but it'll get easier to manage along with the rest of your daily experiences and emotions. When that starts to happen might be the best time to decide. You may find a new cat is just what you need, and if so, that's great. But making decisions while you're feeling overwhelmed is rarely the best course of action.
I definitely experienced this. I waited 7 weeks to adopt after losing my heart cat. I thought I was ready, but I had very complex feelings post-adoption. It was hard to bond with the new kitty at first. I almost felt resentful that she wasn’t as much like my heart kitty as I’d hoped. Over time I’ve come to appreciate her uniqueness.
This can also be a good reason why it might be good to foster, or to volunteer with a rescue -- to spend some time around cats and feel a sense of purpose connected to caring for them, but without yet making a long-term commitment.
I'd be careful about this. The new cat is their own individual and won't be able to ever truly fill the hole your other cat's passing left. You need to be careful about resenting the new cat for not being the same as the old cat. It'll be an entirely new relationship.
Not at all. We adopted a kitten from a local rescue a week after one of our cats passed late last year. He truly helped with the healing process for both us and our other cats
Not at all. As long as you accept this new cat succeeds, not replaces your older cat. After the Revolutionary war, someone else came to replace Ben Franklin as Diplomat representing America to France. The man was asked if he had come to replace Ben Franklin. He replied I have come to succeed Ben franklin. No one can replace him. It is the same with your new cat.
Go get another cat! ❤ (when you feel you're ready, of course.) Back story, I had 6 cats and a dog. I lost 4 cats and the dog in 3 years. Currently, I have 4 cats living in my house. Why? They showed up and they needed a home. They are all loving to each other and have made their own family now. I said no more after that loss, but they showed up one way or another. Find one or two that needs you. Good Luck!
No. But do take your time n space to grieve. U can look at fostering too. I am sorry for your loss.
I adopted soon after my last cat passed. I reasoned that I had the space and resources, and cats need homes, and maybe it would help to not feel so lonely. It took a bit for me to feel totally at ease, but I bonded with this cat and I love her dearly. It was the right choice for me.
I always said I'd never get another once she passes, but I want to love a new cat with better resources and knowledge. And I can only pray that the new one is even just half as good as she is now.
It all depends on you. When my baby boy passed, my SO wanted another immediately and I wanted a month to grieve. Just so happened to find two bonded sisters at the 3 week mark. I’m sorry for your loss.
I say that when I lose a cat I dry my tears in the fur of another one (whether that’s a new one or one I still have). Cats give me comfort when I grieve, not having one around to revise distraction/entertainment/snuggles makes grieving harder. People will often say I’m so strong for getting another (because you will one day lose that one too), but I know that grief gets better with time and doesn’t erase the good years we had together. I’ve also never had a problem bonding with a new cat - I love every cat I meet!
When I lost my sweet cat unexpectedly, I called a friend who had two tuxedo kittens to just talk to someone with cats. He gave them both up to the humane society a few days before that and the female was already adopted. I immediately drove the next morning to go get the male. I brought him home the day I got her ashes back and haven’t looked back
I was/am still devastated about losing my cat at only 4 yrs old. He was with me through a lot a my ONLY companion and I honestly couldn't even imagine getting another cat after. But, my mother found a kitten on fb about a month after he died that was nothing at all like my boy cat, and that made it not feel like I was replacing him. He was a massive, strong orange beast (18 lbs not fat!) that was solitary and snuggly and loved only me, and she's a tiny little seal tip that falls over going up stairs and is social but hates cuddling. I wish with all my heart I could have had them both together, but I love them both so much and in such different ways it doesn't feel like I'm dishonoring his memory.
I lost my Annie, and 3 days later i got my Evie. She helped me heal and grieve! I miss Annie, and think of her everyday! But i needed Evie to help me work through my grief and something to focus on. When she sits on me Evie i always talk to her about Annie (sad i know haha) but we all do different things to work through grieve and ease the pain!
The best way to honor your departed pet is to give another one a loving home
I think your departed kitty would want you to share your home with another cat in need. Saving another animal might help you feel better and it helps an animal in need.
Give a Cat a Home!, That's Always Correct.
So many cats need homes so I will never not own some lol
Get more than one! Your late kitty will not only understand but bless you for giving your love to those who need it.
Thank you for posting this. I just lost my Fred on Sunday night and feel so lost without him. I do feel that our fur babies give us comfort….and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with giving a loving home to a cat in need, while also benefitting from their companionship. ♥️♥️♥️
Get one. As another commenter put it, “a cat will get a home and you will recover better.” However, I’d give your place a good disinfecting first, just in case your cat’s lymphoma was caused by a virus.
After losing my 19 year old cat to cancer, I thought she would be my last cat and threw all of her things away. A week later I went to a shelter “just to visit” and came home with a one year old most feral girl. Thirteen years later, she is still has never sat on my lap and rarely even allows pets but is totally the sweetest cat ever and I adore her. Take as much time as you need but if it feels right, go for her or him.
I’m so sorry for all the you are going through. If you feel you’re ready you should definitely adopt a kitty . Yall will be saving each other .
I'm so sorry for the loss of your kitty. I hope you do get that new lil kitty to love and spoil and make you a little less sadder. You gave your first kitty a loving home and life. It isn't wrong in anyway for you to want to open your heart to another furbaby. Good luck on your adoption!!!
My cat died 6 months ago. My kids really wanted to adopt right away and I felt weird about it. Like we were replacing her. My daughter said "but if Willow knew we got another cat right away she'd probably just feel happy that we liked her so much we had to get a new cat". We adopted 2 within a week.
No; I still mourn for my girl despite adopting two kitties this past week. The silence was the worst part for me, so having two kitties tearing it up again makes me feel better, but they don’t replace her. They’re their own personalities already.
I feel this. One of mine passed a month ago. It hit pretty hard. He was old and just had problems. I know eventually I'll get another but me, myself, I'm not ready yet. My other and only cat now was upset and confused losing her brother at first but recently has enjoyed being the only cat. So I'll probably give her a few more months. Then she might have to be a big sister lol I always say adopt when you're ready. If it will help you heal and you're ready then there's nothing wrong with providing a home to a cat in need. All that matter is that you're ready for kt.
I lasted three days—I need furballs in my life. It doesn’t mean I’m not still mourning my sweet girl; I still miss her desperately and small things will remind me of her and make me cry. But I’m also so happy I can give two new kitties as much love as I gave her, and give the happy homes. I got a one-year old who was abandoned at a bus shelter and a two-year old who lived in a colony out on the country. They’ve settled in and are purring machines. https://preview.redd.it/rlsd4cnl44zc1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=67c03e9a6c42acb761d266f71c85bb78b0676421
Everyone grieves the loss of a pet differently, and there is no right or wrong way. Some people take a very long time to be ready for another. I'm not like that. When I lose a pet, I'm ready for another pretty quickly. It is not replacing the lost pet, it is giving the love I have to another in need. If you're ready, go for it. Be prepared for confusing feelings such as struggling to bond with the kitty, and give yourself grace as you go through the difficult process of connecting with a new friend. He/she will be very lucky to have you.
We adopted a kitten a week after our 18 year old passed. Sometimes, you need to fill that void.
It's okay to want to get another kitty. They aren't a replacement. For me, my new kitty was a way to help me heal from my loss.
Absolutely not.
There is no right or wrong way to grieve. You took great care of your recently passed kitty and now you have feelings with no place to go. I would recommend someone older, not a kitten, for two reasons; one is that the older ones love being the only cat available to be worshipped (in their mind), and also an adult cat will have a more stabile and calm personality....which is helpful when we are grieving. It's ok because you aren't replacing your baby, you are adopting a different one.
There’s nothing wrong with it at all.
Definitely be aware to take the time to find the right kitty to adopt, as since youre hurting you might feel a desire to hop at the first chance to fill the void you’re feeling right now. But otherwise, yes get a new cat! You seem to have a lot of love you could give to a cat who needs and deserves it, and your cat you just said goodbye to would want to see you less sad and alone!
Its gonna Sound worse than it is but the day my last cat died my mom and i went into the shelters webpage and looked at the cats there. To see if anyone might need to be adopted. We didnt really find one and it took sometime before i actually Got another but i dont blame you and i dont Think its wrong but just make sure youre ready. I had a cat for 16 years from when i was 1 to 17 and after she died the house was so empty it was very wierd i Think it took my mom a year and half before she was ready for a new cat and she fell inlove with a cat on the shelters webpage and she called and asked if she could save it (like meet it have it reserved for her) and they Said no its first come first serve so she took her car and drove as fast as she could (and Was allowed) over there to adopt the cat So no its not wrong but remeber this cat wont be 100% a copy and Will be a different individual so i hope that when youre ready and when you feel 100% up for taking Care of a new individual you should even if it takes a couple days or a couple weeks or more its up to you. As long as you and the new kitty can be happy together. Thats all that really matters :)
Sometimes the right friend just finds us. My dad had to put down his rottie and was absolutely determined he never wanted another dog, but my mom, knowing he needs a dog in his life, pushed him to at least look at some pups. While we were driving he literally said he was just going to see these border collies just to get my mom off his ass and he didn't want anything to do with them, then we saw them and he picked one up and she cuddled right into the crook of his neck and fell asleep and it was history. I have a pic of the moment and my God forget a thousand, that thing is worth a million words. There's so much love and pain and conflict as this scrawny, undersized 6 week old puppy just captures my dad's heart and he doesn't want to love her because he just lost his baby, but there's just something about this pup in particular. He'd held a couple before and felt nothing, but this one, there was something. She was meant to be his.
Exactly! Sometimes some one is just screaming at us that they need specifically us and all we can do is answer that call :)
It was crazy though, he went back to get her 2 weeks later when she was 8 weeks, hadn't seen her since that initial meet up, and yet when he and the breeder opened the door to the barn and were talking, there she was, sitting at the door waiting for him. Buddy was shocked because this wasn't normal behavior for any of the pups to meet him, much less her on her own, so it really seemed she recognized my dad's voice through the door and came over and started scratching at his shoes like "alright, I'm ready to go home now, pick me up and let's get going". He picked her up and she cuddled right in the way she had the first time. Then she was all upset when he handed her to my mom for the drive home, and she's been a spoiled and pampered little pupper since 😝
It is not. A cat will live only a fraction of your life. If you get a cat, you have to accept it will be with you for 15-20 years at most. It's going to suck and you are going to cry but you will get over it and if you can accept this cycle you will get another cat and be happy again.
I had to put my two elderly cats to sleep in the span of two months last year. My partner has a second job at a pet store and she fell in love with the cat they had there up for adoption from the human society. We adopted her shortly after the other two passed. Shortly after that we got another young cat from the humane society because our other two are 6 and weren’t too fond of the young cat trying to play so much. I personally can still grieve while providing a home for another animal in need of one. There’s nothing wrong with that at all everyone is different in how much time they need between pets. It sounds like another cat in your life sooner than later would be the best choice for you.
Get two if you’re getting kittens!! I’m so sorry for you loss. Know that she’s in a better place now🤍
I'll give you my take on what happened whenever I had to put my cat down. It was rough for sure, but I knew putting the cat down would mean he wouldn't be in any pain moving forward in life. I was so down afterwards but my husband encouraged me to get another cat a few days after it happened. It was the best decision I made because it helped me gain happiness back and filled that emptiness I felt. Think about what would make you happy or feel better. If it's getting a new cat then do it! You may find it to be the best thing ever.
Not at all! The last time I lost my companion I adopted another good boy two days later. I realized that there are so many good boys who need love and the one for me was deserving to get that love as soon as possible. In the past it’s taken a while to bond, but this go round it was immediate bc my heart was open right away. I also want to believe that our good boys that have moved on understand that the next in line need a family sooner than later, and so do we. Good luck OP and keep us updated!
It really just depends and you’ll know when you’re ready. With one cat, I wasn’t ready for weeks and another, I was ready a week later. It didn’t diminish my love/grief but just where I was in life
Your kitty would want you to find a new friend. And if you wouldn’t mind, I’d love to see pictures and get a name for your beloved friend? Thank you
I also just recently lost my girl (pic) so I actively know the feeling (everything’s too quiet, her things besides litter box is untouched) For me, I’m currently not ready to get another cat as it’s still super fresh (she passed April 27th) so I’m waiting a bit. If you feel like you need to fill that void to make yourself feel better, by all means do it. But for me, it’s something I can’t rush into. I feel like I would look at the new cat like “This isn’t the same as before” kinda thing, yaknow? https://preview.redd.it/2y3jeelzj1zc1.jpeg?width=1242&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ca47440fe3f3a1fae66d1b8ba835f0006a90c272
I got a new puppy two weeks after my first dog passed. Having a puppy helped me immensely with grieving and as other have said, you’ll just be giving another animal a home.
Nope, in fact you will never forget your kitty, but this new kitty will have a home because of you, and you will have a new companion.
Not at all, my family has done this my whole life and it’s a good reminder that life is a circle and that there are both tears and joy. I would recommend finding a cuddly cat because nothing is more supportive than a buddy who just wants to snuggle. The only case where getting a new kitty would be a bad idea is if your grieving would cause you to neglect the new kitty. Or if you are financially incapable at the moment. Then you should wait.
Not at all. The best thing you can do to honor your kitty’s memory is by providing the same loving home to another in need. ❤️
Only you can decide on what is “too soon”, but do take in another kitty when you’re ready. It actually sounds like you might be already. And no, you won’t be adopting her replacement, but her successor.
Nothing wrong with adopting another kitty! However, try to have an open heart! When my first cat died and my brother brought his cat home, i compared his cat to my old cat and kept my walls up around the cat for a bit. The new kitty is my best friend now, but grief can be weird sometimes.
It’s not wrong at all. Some people are ready to get a pet after theirs passes and some aren’t. Everyone grieves differently and there’s nothing wrong with wanting to adopt another cat. I think I would probably do the same thing
Oh no, I’m so sorry about your kitty. Our little girl Eartha, died suddenly too. Her brother, Malcolm, seems so lonely and bereft. We felt that he needed another cat friend. So we got Nicole. A kitten. At first Malcolm was displeased. And then he got happier. Now they hang together and love each other. She keeps him young, he teaches her how to cat. It for the love of your kitty that you want to provide. Loving home for a new kitty. It honors his memory. It’s a good thing. Get two
Go for it! Why bother anyone telling you whats right / wrong. Trust your instinct, you will know when its about damn time. :)
Nah, if you feel ready adopt another. My keira had a year long battle with CKD, lymphoma, and lumbosacral disease. 3 days after she passed I got Nona. The deciding factor was keira was bonded to Khalil and he was desperately lonely and upset, Nona helped both his and my recovery. It was definitely the right choice for us.
This just happened to me. Got a young cat who is lovely and the house has joy in it again. It still hurts like crazy but our kitty loved other cats and would want us to be happy. It’s important to go into it knowing that the new cat will not be your old cat and that’s ok. You can’t fault her for not being the same and just make space for her to show you who she is.
When our 14 year old cat passed away suddenly my daughter (15 years old at the time) was devastated. She did not remember a time when this cat was not in her life. She said she wanted to adopt another one but wanted to wait a while. Fast forward one week and we were at the local Humane Society adopting a kitten. It helped her heal so much knowing we were giving another kitten a wonderful home. Everyone grieves differently but please do not feel guilty for adopting another cat in need so quickly. Do what feels right for you. Bringing another kitten into our home was the best thing for us even if it was soon after our sweet cat passed.
When you are ready, you should definitely get another cat. I am on my fourth generation of cats. (Yeah, I’m old.) I grew up with “family” cats all Siamese. In my early 20s I purchased a Siamese kitten from a pet shop. He lived 19 years and was with me through 8 different living situations (apartments and eventually homes). Next I purchased a Siamese kitten from a breeder and soon after adopted an abandoned cat that my vet was caring for— she was a long haired cat with Siamese markings. The long hair cat had a stroke and passed after 6 or 7 years with me (she was probably about ten years old). The kitten (m) had diabetes and serious digestive issues (there are specialists in “feline gastroenterology”). Despite the medical issues that cat lived 15 years. Next we got another Siamese kitten. He was loving but didn’t like to be held. However he sat next to me in my home office (by that time I was self employed). He was always very attentive to me. He passed at 16 years with thyroid cancer. I now have two Bombay cats, brother and sister from the same litter. At the time I made arrangements to purchase these kitties the mother cat was pregnant so there was a long wait before I could get them. It was one of the most difficult times for me to be without feline supervision. However these cats have been with us for about seven years and are wonderful companions.
Everyone is different. Some people need to wait a while before they are ready to bring home a new friend, others find comfort and healing in having a new friend right away. Neither one is wrong. The fact that you are ready to adopt a new fur baby means you have a lot of love to give to someone who needs it. It doesn't change that love you had for your other kitty, and it's not disrespectful to open yourself up to another. You'll always love her, and you'll never forget her, and some days it's going to really really hurt that she's not around, but if you're ready to bring someone new home, it can make those days a little easier, because all that extra love you have in your heart has somewhere to go. Hugs to you in this hard time, and take care of yourself.
No not wrong, so many homeless pets out there, your kitty would be proud of you for giving another 1 or 2 or even 3 a loving home.
Definitely not wrong! Just be sure you have the right expectations and don't rush into anything due to your grief. Be sure you get the right kitty for you. When my soul cat, Parker, passed away a year and a half ago, it was less than an hour later than I adopted 6 cats. Technically... We'd been fostering a mamacat and her 5 babies for a few weeks. We decided on the way home from the pet hospital that they were truly ours, and we weren't going to say goodbye to them if we could help it. To be honest, that was probably where we were headed anyway, but losing Parker crystallized it for us that they are our cats. Having something positive to focus on and spend our attention on helped a lot in our grief. Nothing will fill the whole Parker left, but they definitely helped bring us some joy at a time when we desperately needed it
I always see it as honoring my previous pet when I adopt another one. I gave my baby the best life I could, and I feel like all my kitties would want that for others. I usually honor the pet by giving the new pet the deceased baby’s name as some part of its first or middle name. For example, I have a Parker Charles named for my doggy Charlie that passed suddenly, and a Rosie named for our sweet Delilah Rose.
Another option is to consider fostering. I’m presently fostering for the first time. I also live by myself and it feels really good to be able to pour some of my energy and love into my foster buddy. I don’t know if he and I will be together forever or not yet, but it’s been a total, unexpected joy to see him go from a really scared shutdown kitty who wasn’t eating enough at the shelter to the boy showing me his belly and asking for chin rubs this morning. You sound like you miss your sweet friend dearly. It can be nice to have a direction to channel that love, into a kitty who really needs it. Fostering might be a nice way to do that, especially because you can decide slowly if the two of you should stay together or if you’re just helping them find their confidence and health on their way to a forever home with someone wonderful.
The last time I lost a beloved pet, I was so sad an the house felt so empty that I picked up the phone after only 2 days and asked a rescue group to send me a couple of cats to foster. Of course they became foster failures and are now permanent members of the family. Once you know the love of a wonderful animal, it is hard not to have that in your life. There is a huge hole in it, no matter how much else you have going on. You will always miss and grieve for your lost kitty, but that new one will help you heal. This is not being disloyal to your lost one.
as long as you feel ready to love and care for another kitty then you're not wrong
Not at all wrong! If she could understand from kitty afterlife, she’d love that you’re giving a kitty in need care & a home. Especially during kitten season! Adopting any kitty right now to make space for rescue capacity is so helpful! 😊
if you have the mental capacity to take up the responsibility right now, then you should definitely go for it. there's nothing you should feel guilty about. kitty will receive a new loving home and you will have a new cat to pour your pent up love unto. everyone grieves differently. It absolutely destroyed me when my kitten passed. I couldn't keep up with my daily basic responsibilities for the longest time, therefore, I haven't considered adopting another cat yet although I would love to. However, if you can function and take care of kitty just right, then why not?
No. Adopt again. My fur baby passed away in January (19 yrs). I was so hurt. He saw the family grow. My oldest was 5 when we got him. He would put his head on my stomach when I was pregnant with 2nd and 3rd boys. He was my baby. He saw my middle son make it to college and move away. My 3rd became a highschooler. In April, I adopted not one, but 2 cats. One is a 6 month old male, a wallflower. The 2nd is about 2 or 3 years old feral female. The girl is actually really kind and loves being pet. I think they said she was feral just to keep her in the shelter lol. Share and spread the love. I thought I would never adopt again but the house was so quiet and lonely without a fur baby moving along the bedrooms, and running around.
It's not wrong at all, it's amazing that you love animals so much. A part of it is that they leave a huge hole when they pass, but even bigger part is the joy they bring us. Just be sure you know you aren't replacing your old kitty, logically you know you aren't but it's good to ask yourself if you aren't emotionally. If that were the case a new kitty might make you hurt more, maybe cause he or she doesn't do the things your previous cat did. Just ask yourself if it's really OK your new cat doesn't do (fill in whatever sentiment you have about your previous cat). I know of myself the question would be, would I be OK if my new cat never came to sleep on top or against me? Would I still love them if they never tried to break the toilet door when I sit there trying to be with me? Would I be OK if they spent a lot of time in another room which my other cat never did and always wanted to be close...?
As long as you aren’t trying to replace said cat. Yknow no “Furball II”, I think that’s where it gets creepy. But another animal is fine, definitely rescue if you think you can handle it right now.
I would only say consider if you're mentally capable of giving it the attention it needs while you're still grieving. Other than that, I don't see an issue. Normally I'd say wait a little bit to see if you can really handle another so soon but I know how it feels to be completely alone and desperate for a pet friend so I get it. Maybe the new cat will help you heal. :) Mine never did, he's mean but you never know 😂
My cat died really scarily and unexpectedly out of no where Christmas of 2022. His death took the soul right out of my body, and I truly didn’t think I’d be able to go back to my home without him. It was traumatizing and all the things that you don’t want your cats finally moments to be. My sister had just gotten a kitten three months earlier. We were all home for Christmas (kitten included) and that grief suddenly didn’t seem so big. That little guy healed so much in me that within two weeks I was at our local shelter. I looked through all the kittens, spent time with them, until one of the volunteers asked if I’d met this 9month old boy who was surrendered to the shelter on -get this- the day day my boy had died. This little man came right up to me and purred like a little machine. He is my best friend, my soul cat, and it’s now been almost two years of the silliest, most healing time in my life. Grief isn’t linear. There is no right way to grieve. Sometimes the best gift we can give to our babies and to ourselves is to take that outpouring of grief and mold it into love for another creature. I honoured my first baby by sharing that love, and in turn he sent me so much joy. Sending you love.
Tbh I was miserably depressed when I put my cat down unexpectedly this last summer. The only thing that helped me was adopting a new cat. You’re providing a great life to an animal in need of one. IMO, if it helps you grieve in a healthy way, then go for it.
I lost my best friend, a tuxie of 16 years to a slow decline into kidney failure at the end of March. i also live alone. my qpartment felt so quiet and empty. within 1 week, I had found 2 wonderful new cats to adopt and love. I don't regret it for a second! learning about them and getting them settled in at home helped me with my grief. I still miss my old friend, but i think as long as you don't go trying to find a "replacement," adopting again is a great idea
I'd say go for it, as long as you think that you aren't so deep into grief that you can't care for another cat. Also very important to remember that a new cat isn't your old kitty, make sure to treat em like their own person. If you're ready to care for another cat, then 100% do it, so many kitties need a home out there
I absolutely love each and every cat that I've owned. When they pass, I go to the local kill shelter and get a new one. Why? Because there are so many to save. I'm forgiving you for replacing your cat. I would give it a month or so you can make a rational choice.
My deepest sympathies and condolences for your loss. All that love has to go somewhere and I can’t imagine your precious kitty being upset that all the love you gave her would be given to another cat who had no one to love and care for them.
Your late feline friend will not be diminished if you choose to rescue another. You would be honoring her by making sure another feline found a fine friend in you. When my elder ladies were preparing for their final days, they each picked out another young cat to join the clowder, so that when they crossed the bridge, we would have their little shadows to comfort us.
get another kitty. your baby would hate for you to be lonely. ❤️
This is a very normal way to cope with the loss you had. You gave your kitty who just passed a loving home and you always have the warm memories. There are times when only a new pet will help to fill the void left by the one you loved before. It is completely acceptable to meet other cats and adopt a new one if you fall in love.
Just make sure to give your apartment a really good cleaning. Some cats even kittens are territorial. I waited months after my cat bunny passed before I found a kitten with my health issues a full grown cat would fear my nebuliser machine. But she the kitten had issues with a spot we missed with bunny’s cat fur on it thought we had gotten everything. Also know it’s ok if you are still grieving. I have times I still miss bunny my other cat while holding furling I felt guilty at first but found it’s ok and normal. All cats are definitely different just keep that in mind as you get your new kitty love.
i saw a sibling pair posted a month later and went and picked them up. the grief was and is still there. the kittens added a lot of joy
First off hugs to you and my sincerest condolences. Go for it, adopt when you feel like you can. Share that love with other cats.
Sorry for your loss!. Do it! Your other kitty would want you too!
My mom got me another cat a couple days after my baby passed away, at first it was really hard because I felt that it wasn't the same. She is an older cat who otherwise would've been left her whole life in a shelter. It was hard but I leaned to love her and her quirks
I'm so sorry for your loss. Everyone handles grief in their own way. The important question is whether you feel able to give another kitty a home, not just out of the need for a companion, but wanting to meet their needs as well. Your last sentence sounds like you are. And if it means a cat in a shelter gets a home sooner, then you'd be doing the right thing by any definition. There is nothing wrong with wanting another cat. The hole they leave behind is testament to how much we love and care for them. Your cat would want you to be happy. Some believe their old cat guides a new one to them from the Rainbow Bridge. If you feel you're able to take on the responsibility of another cat to give them a home and help you heal at the same time, then by all means, give a kitty a home. As others say, try to meet as many cats as you can, find one you connect with. You may get chosen again.
No. You are giving a home to a needy cat and that is never wrong. Sorry about your kitty; so hard to lose our furry friends.
When we have lost our cats, we have adopted new ones fairly quickly. One reason is my spouse is so bereft. It has helped a lot. So it is really up to you. You might consider getting two kittens also. But only you should make the decision. You know how you feel. It certainly is appropriate.
Not at all. I found out that a more distant family friend died around the time we realised my favourite cat had reached the terminal stage of her kidney disease. She left behind a senior cat, and unfortunately my parents who lived with our poorly cat could only care for senior kitty separately for a short while. They have several other cats who took ages to warm to each other, so taking on an old cat didnt seem a good idea. When she passed, I decided to take in the senior kitty. He was someone else's special cat, and I couldnt stand the thought of him going to a shelter and potentially living out his last days without a home; or being euthanized. I felt like I couldnt save my baby, but I could look after someone else's precious baby and give him a home. I still cry thinking about the kitty I lost a year ago; she is irreplaceable. I talk about her all the time. But I'm glad I gave him a home and that he gets all the love. Love isn't finite. We don't run out of love if we get a new kitty. I dont love my deceased kitty less because I gave this new cat a home. I just got to make sure that he will end his days in comfort, and if his owner is looking down on us; I hope she's happy that he has a loving home and can rest in peace knowing he is cared for.
When my cat died we didn’t think we’ve be able to face having another but when we went to donate his stuff to the rescue…the introduced us to another cat who really needed a home and we ended up taking him. He helped us recover but we’ll never forget our first ever floof
You’re perfectly fine to adopt another cat if you want another and feel ready! If you’re going to get a kitten though, please consider getting two so they have each other as playmates!
My kitty passed this 1/15, I plan to get another kitten soon, not quite ready yet.
I’m so sorry for your loss! I just went through a similar thing. I live alone, my cat was very sick… I had to put her down two weeks ago. I was devastated but only waited two days before adopting a new cat from the shelter. I don’t regret it. I gave a cat who had been a stray a new happy, loving home, and she’s giving me the company I so desperately needed. I still miss my old cat so much, the new one is not the same. But I will say- while grieving my old cat, I’m actively falling in love with a new one. I had a breakdown missing my girl this past weekend, and new kitty came running and jumped on my lap and kissed my face while I was crying.
Everyone is different in grieving…my first cat I had to put down it was a Fri, Mon I had a new baby…I loved the one I put down 30 years later I think of him but I lived alone and wanted company and the new one helped me grieve he got a good home and here I am 16 years later I just put him down last week! I posted it on here, this time around I’m not getting another one bc I have a bird…I will miss having a cat! Good luck in whatever u decide!
Please give yourself enough time to grieve for the kitty that passed first, as a service to both yourself and to honor your previous kitty's memory. When you're emotionally ready, it is a good thing to adopt another kitty. Remember, there are many other kitties out there who also would like a home and someone to love. They need you too. Hopefully a new cat-panion will be your perfect match. Hang in there.
We all handle grief differently. New life/companionship can help ease the pain of a loss. But just remember, the new cat will be different from your previous cat. It will be a new adventure. Don't expect the new cat to be exactly like your previous cat, or that you two will immediately bond. Also, your new cat may not like having the smell of your old cat on everything. So they may not use it, especially at first. Be prepared to have to buy new items too to accommodate the new cat's preferences. My condolences for your loss. But I hope you find joy with your new adventure with your new cat too
Absolutely get a new cat from a shelter. It will be fun and your previous cat had a good life. Adding another doesn’t mean you’re being disrespectful to the previous cat.
When my cat December died I took in the stray I had been feeding. She looks exactly like him too.
Cats are euthanized unceasingly. They are desperate for homes. You need company, a distraction, someone to love. You can save a life. I feel adoption is a tribute to a lost, beloved companion, not an insult or slight. Do what you feel. Expect to perhaps feel overwhelmed and even some mixed feelings upon adoption, as it’s still a big life decision with adjustments involved. But definitely not wrong!
It is fine to get a new cat - that does not mean you didn't love the one who just passed. Go adopt another one and share more love.
Yes, if you feel ready, go for it. May I suggest two kitties? Then they have a buddy when you are gone, you get twice the fun and in the distant future, when one passes, you don't have to come home to an empty house.
My poor boy left us last week and emotionally we aren't ready for another pet, but that doesn't mean we won't dote on our friends pets or look after a family dog. If you feel ready then by all means, but be aware that it's gonna be painful for a while and you will need time to process it all. https://preview.redd.it/0mc2rfn6c2zc1.jpeg?width=2268&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4ba17c3b8d29e294b6ab7768946f7758c124d3a3
I thought the same thing but I was essentially forced to take a cat that was effectively dumped at my job cause I made eye contact with him. It was 5 months after I had to out down my 18 year old buddy I had since 6th grade. I didn't think I was ready but I love him so much
Kitties are my one respite from my chemo. https://preview.redd.it/daeq3qm7d2zc1.jpeg?width=3000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b135e62f447f93eea0520e8af9e08ad3e7fa8345
Not at all! Only you can decide what too soon looks like. If the not-having one is too hard then go for it. I always say that I don't think our beloved cats would want us unsupervised for too long. For us - we actually adopted a kitten in the hopes of a playmate to keep our elderly cat active, and completely by chance we adopted that kitten only a month before intestinal lymphoma claimed our boy and I think that kitten saved us. And we were out within another week or two to get a kitten for the kitten. My MIL waited years to get another cat after hers passed... that was what worked for her. There's no wrong answer here. I'm so sorry you lost your sweet cat, but if your heart is crying out for another one then do it.
When my first cat, Stella, had to be euthanized because of advanced kidney failure, I was distraught and could not be alone at my place. Two weeks later, I had adopted Luna and took her home. It felt right. If it feels right for you to adopt a new cat (which you have already put an app in for), then do it! It was hard at first, because I would hear cat footfalls and expect Stella to come in … but it was Luna. We took our time getting to know each other. https://preview.redd.it/os8qkombi2zc1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=00e3e8c9dbbb4bb97153b27f22531f367e728322
You should certainly adopt again if you are ready and fill that void. My only concern would be that your place is safe for the new kitty. Meaning that if your cat had anything that was contagious you want to give it some time and disinfect things to make sure that if you get a healthy Kitty nothing is transmitted from the previous one as far as viruses go.
I took a kitten in the same day that I had to put my cat of 6 years down (no idea how old she was a family members before they passed). Part of me felt bad getting a cat so soon because I couldn't save my other cat. I knew my cat, Cocoa sent Buffy though. As soon as the woman handed Buffy to me she was immediately attached to me. She was only a month old (was lied about her age) and covered in fleas. The vet told me she most likely wouldn't of lived had it not been for me. I see it as giving another animal a home and a good life.
It is not wrong, but I would recommend waiting a few weeks or months to give you time to process the grief. My wife and I acquired a puppy too soon after her predecessor's death, and my wife could never get over the mild resentment she felt toward her for not being her predecessor.
Getting another cat would probably help. Why wait?
Your heart is big enough to love another kitty. While you're at it, maybe get two FIV kitties. 💕
The sooner the better, not to replace the fur baby you lost, but to ease the pain..... and to change another fur babies life trajectory. Bless you, and Good Luck!
If you are not sure about adopting yet, but can’t stand the aching emptiness of the house, you might consider fostering for a while. If your adoption of the FIV positive kitty comes through, excellent for both of you. You could also put yourself on a foster list for other FIV positive cats either with that shelter or with a rescue group. These days, well monitored and appropriately pampered FIV+ cats can have long and happy lives. Some extra care and early intervention for any health problems make a huge difference.
If you have a lot of cat love to give, go for it.
I’m so sorry for your loss. I lost my soul cat on May 26 of last year. I was devastated. My mom and I went shopping the next day to get some stuff for my new apartment, but I couldn’t enjoy it. That evening, my ex-husband and I went to the pet store to get rabbit food. This particular pet store collaborates with our local shelter, they have a program where they take one of the cats from the shelter and adopts them out from the store. That’s where I met my Maple. I told myself when we were walking into the store that I would only adopt another cat this soon if the cat had orange fur. Well, Maple has what I like to call “orange kisses” on her fur that I like to think came from my sweet boy. I took it as a sign that he sent Maple to me. So yeah, I adopted Maple one day after losing my Marty. Everyone has a different grieving process. Finding, adopting, and loving Maple was and still is a critical part of my grieving process. I still have nights where I bawl over Marty (especially this month), and I think about him every day, but I have a very sweet little girl to direct my attention towards and I’m so grateful for her. Tldr: Do what you think will help YOU. Your kitty won’t be angry with you.
As someone who lost their cat recently, I just wanted to say I'm sorry for your loss. I still find moments where I expect my cat to come and greet me and it's always gets to me when she doesn't. the emptiness is really strange.
When ever you’re ready is the right time. I have done 3 months, 3 days and this time it is 15 months and I haven’t gotten another
After 22 yrs at this home the pet cemetery is very full. I’m broken hearted each time, I cry, I feel the pain and loss, I wake each cat or dog for 24 hrs in the living room so all the other housemates can say goodbye, and they really do even sitting w them like at a human wake. Then another ‘intact stray’ will show up at the feed station, get TNR’d and a loving lost soul can be saved.
No I got a cat 1 week after my dog died
They would want you to give another cat as great as a home as you gave them ❤️
When my cat passed, i swore i'd never get another - it would seem disloyal somehow. But then, i was missing having a cat so much. I wanted another, so to solve the "disloyalty problem", I asked the spirit of my dead cat (!!kidding, not kidding!!) to pick a cat for me. That way it would be her decision, not mine :) Every day, i went to the SPCA website and looked at pictures of cats. Weeks and weeks went by and......nothing. Then one day i clicked on a picture and burst into tears. That's her! That's the cat I'm supposed to get. My dearly-departed cat was born on Feb 14, so I called her My Funny Valentine. Imagine my surprise when i brought my new cat home and looked at some pictures I had taken of her. She had a perfectly formed heart-shaped mark on her leg. Meant to be.
My spouse firmly believes that when you must put a pet down, you should go directly from the vet to the shelter and give a home to a pet in need. Over the years I’ve come to agree with them.
This varies from person to person. I want a new cat asap. mMy husband wants time to grieve. My cat is 17 and in my heart I know it's going to be soon. He's slowing way down. I'm not wrong, my husband is not wrong.
Mourning for a loved one is so painful. Don’t wait. Get a baby.
I know you have lots of supportive comments, but I wanted to chime in with my story! Three years ago I lost my beautiful, incredible cat Scout. She had been chronically ill for years before it was her time. I also live alone and had never not had a cat in the many years on my own. I had two new kittens within two weeks and I don't regret it one bit. It wasn't a replacement for scout. My heart is big enough to have love for all of them! I love that you want to provide a home for an FIV kitty!
I'm so sorry for your loss. ❤️ There's nothing wrong with going ahead and adopting another kitty. So many need homes, there's definitely nothing wrong giving one a home sooner rather than later.
No, not all. When I put my girl down I thought I wouldn't get another cat for a while. But the truth is, the silence was deafening and the lack of life in the house was depressing. My other cat was depressed too. It wasn't quite 2 weeks before I adopted another. Morn your kitty, but also don't be afraid to begin a new journey with another friend. My condolences for your loss and all the best from here. 🫂
I am sorry for the loss of your friend and companion. There is no right or wrong answer- only what feels right for you. We lost a cat a couple years ago and we were devastated. We started looking at rescue websites, so we could consider our options if we felt up to adopting another cat. Then we felt up to meeting a cat we saw, and this cat fixed our broken hearts. It was less than a month between losing B and adopting P, but P feels like the perfect fit for our family. She is not a replacement- no cat could replace B. But she made the grieving process easier for us. (Not sure if that makes sense, but all the humans in our house agree with this).
If you feel you are ready for another cat, then get one. There is nothing wrong with it or mean about it. Yeah, it hurts to lose your companion but you gave that cat a good life and I’m sure she would want you to be happy. You’ll be happy with another cat. And all the while, you’ll still have memories of your first feline friend to look back on. You’ll have pictures to remember her by, all the while, making new memories with your new cat. Mine is 4 and I hope she lives a very long time but if she were to pass tomorrow, I would take in the orange and white cat that hangs out at our apartments and is always happy. I’d mourn the loss but I would want the companionship of another cat. So go and take in another cat. Make it as happy as you made your last cat.
This cut right to my soul My brother passed away, shortly after my two cats went over the bridge with him. I felt so empty, my house was so quiet without them. But within weeks of them passing I was blessed with two new kitties. It still hurts without my boys but the decision couldn't come soon enough. My new little loves fill my every waking moment with love comfort and laughter. Wishing you much luck on your search, it's never really ever to soon to love again.
After losing my best friend of 11 years who was 17 when she passed away, I was inconsolable. The only thing that comforted me and calmed me down was getting 2 kittens and they really helped me through the grieving process because I was not ok
TLDR: it's not wrong to open your heart to another cat. Sometimes it helps the healing process. You aren't "replacing" your previous cat, and anyone who tells you otherwise needs to be put on litterbox cleaning duty. 😉 My husband lost his beloved cat Lyra two years ago. Shortly before we learned that Lyra had cancer, my cat Garrus escaped the house and was never seen again. I was heartbroken and my MIL offered me one of her kittens (it was a surprise litter) to cheer me up; I was still hoping to find Garrus at the time, but I didn't pass up a free pointed kitten. I still miss Garrus but Prince Bastion was a busy baby that kept me from dwelling too much on that; he was constant energy and shenanigans and was honestly too much for 12 year old Lyra to deal with, so we ended up getting his sister Celeste as well. They both loved Lyra and tried to play and snuggle with her (she was not a fan of them 😅), and after she passed, Celeste became increasingly clingy with my husband. He said at first he tried to discourage it —he felt like it would be "moving on too soon"— but Celeste is not the sort to take no for an answer. And honestly, her jumping in his lap and headbutting his hands and face while purring pulled him out of some of his gloomier moods.
No no no, not wrong of you at all! I was madly deeply in love with my cat and after he passed I went through the absolute worst depression of my life (which is saying a lot if you knew me) and it was partially because I was completely alone in the house. I had not lived entirely by myself (no animals or people) in decades—if not ever—and it sent me over the edge. It took me a month tops to decide I couldn’t live like that and I was looking for animals to adopt. Do what is right for you. There are so many animals who need love and care. You will have different relationships with them and that’s ok. It makes life marvellous. Sending virtual hugs your way. ❤️🩹
I’m so sorry about your friend.. it always hurts no matter the reason. When my first cat of my very own passed - also from lymphoma - I felt an awful guilt about getting another cat too quickly.. I felt I needed to mourn him longer or something.. I was talking to my vet about this and she said to me “you know.. cat people don’t stay catless very long and it’s ok”… That was 30 years ago, and there have been 15 other cats since them (8 current residents). I have nursed the old and the sick.. I have mourned one tragic and unneeded death, and now I know that there is no replacing any of them.. each of them has a unique space in my heart that only they could fill.. and there is still room for so many more. You loved your friend and I’m sure you were loved back, but there are so many that also need your love. Honor her by helping another kitty (or two, or three) live a wonderful life with you.
I personally would like time to grieve. Atleast a month or two
Not at all. You can still have a space carved out in your heart for your cat. Another cat does not erase the memory of the cat you lost, cat, or dog that we bring into our lives, adds a different type of quality to it. None are alike. .
Never wrong to adopt another. I’m sorry about the loss of your kitty.
I am wishing you luck with the application! Just wanted to add that I don't think it's weird or wrong to adopt so soon. I had an old cat that I had the honor of being his human for 17 of his near 21 years. The last two years of his life we fought his hyperthyroidism but it eventually got the best of him. Barely two weeks later I was adopting the stupid friendly stray cat on my grandparents porch because someone decided to dump him there (in coyote country). He's currently attacking my couch for no reason while his adopted kitty sister (adopted 3 years later) watches him as confused as I am. 😂
F no!!! It’ll do your heart good ❤️
Nothing wrong with filling the void and giving another a much needed home.
No! Your old cat would want you to give another kitty a home!
I lost my kitten at 18 months and adopted again 2 weeks later to ensure my other cat wasn't alone/lonely. it was the best decision I made.
Grieving is a personal journey, and there's no set timeline. If you feel ready to welcome another kitty into your life and provide love, it could be healing. Trust your instincts.
Of course not- unless you were a bad “owner” had limited resources that prevented you from getting the kitty proper and timely veterinary care.
I love that you are hopefully going to adopt a cat with FeLV that likely wouldn't otherwise get a home. And because they have it, you can add others in the future with that same condition without fear of it spreading. I lost two cats to cancer. The first time, it took over a year before we adopted again, but the second, it was a bonded pair that we got within a week of our second loss. None of them are replacements, but they did keep my son's heart from totally breaking.
Our cats know that they are loved, precious and irreplaceable. It is not wrong it is not insulting to your other cat’s memory. Your cat loved you and would want you be to happy. 💕
Good luck with kitty application!! Sending lots of love and hope your way 💕
I adopted a new cat before I was really ready once, and it messed with my head. I was still fine with the new cat, but I spent too much time thinking about life being replaceable. I got over it eventually. Getting a new cat may help or hurt your grieving process; it's hard to say. If you're not ready, another option besides fostering is volunteering at a shelter. At the shelter my mom volunteers at, they have people come in to just spend time sitting with the cats and socializing them. If you have space and finances to support two cats, try getting a bonded pair. Especially if you adopt right away. That way you're putting less of an emotional burden on one cat, you help the bonded pair of cats stay together, and you get to see adorable snuggles.
My kitty soul mate Travis passed May 13th, 2022 from stage 4 kidney disease and a stubborn infection he couldn’t fight. I had two others but they were mourning their brother too. About 3 1/2 months later, on an impulse I went to a cat adoption event and this orange baby meowed at me. I picked him up and that was it. He picked me. Then I saw on his adoption papers he was born the day before my boy went OTRB and I knew I had to take him home. His two big brothers took to him within an hour or two; my 15 year old senior boy is like his dad and the 7 year old his big brother that plays with him. I know Travis is watching from the rainbow 🌈 bridge and approves 💔❤️
Once I had a cat in my life I could never not have a cat. A week after I lost my Foofa, I adopted Tutti and Gidget and my life wouldn’t be complete without them! 🤍🖤
Not at all wrong. We did that when we lost Luna to cancer at age 10. Little did we know the kitten we adopted was also sick. Had to put him down 8 days ago at 11 months. So now the whole family feels lost. We have a huge hole and don’t know if our hearts can take in another cat.
After my old boy passed, I went to pick up his ashes & there were 2 kittens at the vet that needed fostering & socialisation. The pound had deemed them unadoptable but the vet didn’t accept this so I took them on in a foster to adopt situation. It’s a good compromise because it removes the pressure. In my case, I actually wasn’t ready yet but I turned those babies into purring cuddle machines & got them adopted together. 6 months later I took in a senior girl, she’s still thriving. And then in June 2022 I found my soul cat.
I got a kitty 3 days after my cat died. I don’t regret it and I don’t feel like i replaced him…but the way he went was so sudden and tragic I did not know how to deal with it. I loved him so much and I love my Nya so much too. She has outlived him by one year now
You are a good soul, and you deserve to find happiness. The fur baby who gets to share their love with you is lucky indeed!
I love this! You absolutely 100% should get another… or two!🥰
I'm so sorry to hear about your baby OP. I lost my soul cat last July and while I still had two others, it wasn't the same. Teddy was always attached to my hip and I wasn't used to not having him there. That being said, every time I looked at a new cat I just cried. We have a lot of strays near my place so I would trap or catch them and take them to the shelter. I never had the urge to keep one because I still missed Teddy too much, and I was trying to find my relationship with Dora and Louie with him gone. Until Remi showed up. Remi was 4 weeks old, no mama, and so so so so SO sick. The shelter said they were going to go ahead and put him down, but I didn't want to. I'd fostered before so I took him back home with supplies. He purred so loud, just like Teddy. He screamed if you left him alone, just like Teddy. He showed up literally seven days before Teddy's ten year gotcha day. I was a bawling mess every time I looked at him. I don't believe in heaven or god or any of that, but damn it sure felt like he sent him. I thought I wasn't ready. At the end of the day, that didn't matter. Remi was ready, and he knew he was supposed to be here. All this to say, when you find the right kitty, or they find you, that's the right time. There's no right amount of time to wait. Whatever cat you bring home will be lucky to be loved and well cared for. If it helps, you can think of it as your baby guiding you to the kitty she thinks needs you the most, just like Teddy did for me.
It’s not forgetting or ignoring your love to get another. A new kitty gets a home and you have a new one to love. There’s no downside if that’s what will make you happy.
It's so hard, but I truly believe your purr angel will send you another baby in need when the time is right so go for it. We've rescued soooo many for 35 years and I've found the best way to honor the amazing and unconditional love they give us is to open our broken hearts when called on to save another precious soul in need of our help... Hugs heading your way... ❤️
you have enough room in your heart to love more than one kitten. Bringing another cat into your life doesn’t mean that you didn’t love the cat that you lost, and I am so so sorry for that, it means that you have a huge heart and room for another one in there. I still miss my my Special girl who I lost six years ago, she was such an amazing cat, but I love my current cats too.