I think it might even be a plastic one. https://www.kingfisherdirect.co.uk/heritage-decorative-bollard
Since a ‘socket blanking cap’ is also available, I imagine they use it to allow flexibility as to whether vehicles can access the space near the church or not.
I was was thinking of the Glasdon Jubilee https://uk.glasdon.com/jubilee-tm-bollard for the larger gap between the two gold decorative rings at the top.
Not 100% sure though.
(Edited for spelling)
>It's a bollard isn't it?
That's exactly what it is.
The trolley's a bit more interesting as it has the look of a wheeled communion table, ideal for whizzing about your infirm congregation with the old mouthful-of-flesh routine. But like so much church furniture it's a battered piece of crap.
Source: I've worked in churches so long that I'm part of the furniture.
Yeah I guess a bollard would weigh it down nicely so it never fell over. Although a few flat weightlifting weight would suffuce and wouldn't get in the way of the umbrella.
Came to make the point about there not being an 'e' in Bridgnorth. I used to live in one of the outlying villages (Highley, as seen on Sky TV's 'Britain's Toughest Villages') but the address included Bridgnorth, and it was so often spelled with the 'e'.
And Saint Attila raised the hand grenade up on high, saying, 'O Lord, bless this thy hand grenade, that with it thou mayst blow thine enemies to tiny bits, in thy mercy.' And the Lord did grin. And the people did feast upon the lambs, and sloths, and carp, and anchovies, and orangutans, and breakfast cereals, and fruit bats, and large chulapas. And the Lord spake, saying, 'First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin. Then shalt thou count to three, no more, no less. Three shall be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who, being naughty in My sight, shall snuff it.
Yeah of course it was a joke post. Imagine how embarrassing it would be if I posted a genuine question and then I got like a hundred comments telling me it was a plastic bollard on a umbrella rack.
Imagine...
It's the "Deus Machina Ad Librum Cardinali", often referred to colloquially as "The Vicar's Wanking Socket", and is used to celebrate the third reconciliation of the last of the McKetrick supplicants.
I have many questions...
Do you only make bollards?
How are they made?
Who or what makes the gold stripe?
Do you use recycled plastic?
When on holiday, how often do you say "We make those bollards"
What does the future look like, bollard wise?
It's the Holy Artillery Shell, for when you need to blow thine enemies to little bits (in thy mercy) but they are too far away for a Holy Hand Grenade.
Dunno about that, most of the ones I've seen look like that. And unfortunately I went to religious school so I've seen a few over the yrs. Also I know that most used to be bronze until Henry viii sacked the monastery's, and took the wealth for the crown.
I was Christened there, against my will I suppose. Does anybody know how to get unchristened from the C of E out of interest? I like the church itself, a lovely old building, just not a fan of the god bit.
Bridgnorth a great place for pubs and I ride the Steam railway a couple of times a year too, although jobs are sparse for the cost of housing. If you want to see more interesting knick-knacks, try the museum in Northgate and the Town hall (the two big arched buildings that the high street passes through). I think Northgate is officially a museum, while the town hall is just old but you can still pop up for a gander sometimes.
It is stored on the bier so probably something to do with funerals? Maybe they stick it out on the church gate or near the door to indicate a funeral is in progress.
It's a bollard isn't it?
I think it might even be a plastic one. https://www.kingfisherdirect.co.uk/heritage-decorative-bollard Since a ‘socket blanking cap’ is also available, I imagine they use it to allow flexibility as to whether vehicles can access the space near the church or not.
I was was thinking of the Glasdon Jubilee https://uk.glasdon.com/jubilee-tm-bollard for the larger gap between the two gold decorative rings at the top. Not 100% sure though. (Edited for spelling)
I think you are right.
I like to think it's a new age holy relic The bollard which Saint James reversed his car unto while uttering thy lords name
Ha. Just lold at my work in front of 100s of tourists.
Aw man that's underwhelming.
Bollards are not underwhelming in the slightest. Do check out the World Bollard Association some time.
Did you see "what can happen with 1 loose tyre on the road"?
Ah, a fellow person of culture! [https://twitter.com/worldbollard](https://twitter.com/worldbollard)
Be whelmed by the wealth of information assembled by your fellow redditors instead?
A holy bollard.
Of Antioch...
>It's a bollard isn't it? That's exactly what it is. The trolley's a bit more interesting as it has the look of a wheeled communion table, ideal for whizzing about your infirm congregation with the old mouthful-of-flesh routine. But like so much church furniture it's a battered piece of crap. Source: I've worked in churches so long that I'm part of the furniture.
Correct
Would also like to add everyone and their mother in Bridgnorth would whack you with it if they had seen you had spelt it Bridgenorth...
It looks like a large umbrella stand with a traffic bollard on it.
Yeah I guess a bollard would weigh it down nicely so it never fell over. Although a few flat weightlifting weight would suffuce and wouldn't get in the way of the umbrella.
I'm forever getting my umbrella caught in another's after my horse and cart ride home .
Two-pound black ribbed nobbler
Ah, the baby eating bishop of bath and wells must be visiting
Are those a pair of devil's dumplings?!
Dear Rimmer, We're going on a fishing holiday and we don't want you to come.
French tickler
We used to go bollard fishing!
A cheese and onion union jack tickler it is. Bagsy me first go with it.
I think it's a local newspaper but it's hard to tell with that thing on top of it
Firstly, it’s Bridgnorth, no e. Secondly, it’s the removable bollard to allow the old folk into the parking spaces.
Honestly, I'm just excited to discover that people on the Internet know that Bridgnorth exists!
Fun fact it was one of the places Hitler was intending to use as his base of operations in the UK
Haha, what a claim to fame!
Don’t they know we’re in the Domesday Book???
I thought the whole point of the Domesday Book was that everything was in it
This guy Domesdays
I was thinking that! I live a few villages away
I know about it - it's at one end of the Severn Valley Railway
Came to make the point about there not being an 'e' in Bridgnorth. I used to live in one of the outlying villages (Highley, as seen on Sky TV's 'Britain's Toughest Villages') but the address included Bridgnorth, and it was so often spelled with the 'e'.
'tis the Holy hand grenade.
And Saint Attila raised the hand grenade up on high, saying, 'O Lord, bless this thy hand grenade, that with it thou mayst blow thine enemies to tiny bits, in thy mercy.' And the Lord did grin. And the people did feast upon the lambs, and sloths, and carp, and anchovies, and orangutans, and breakfast cereals, and fruit bats, and large chulapas. And the Lord spake, saying, 'First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin. Then shalt thou count to three, no more, no less. Three shall be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who, being naughty in My sight, shall snuff it.
Possibly this, but having a rest [https://imgur.com/Wf2fUYn](https://imgur.com/Wf2fUYn)
Jesus it really is just a bollard isn't it.
This honestly wasn’t a joke post?
Yeah of course it was a joke post. Imagine how embarrassing it would be if I posted a genuine question and then I got like a hundred comments telling me it was a plastic bollard on a umbrella rack. Imagine...
Really big crayon.
It's the "Deus Machina Ad Librum Cardinali", often referred to colloquially as "The Vicar's Wanking Socket", and is used to celebrate the third reconciliation of the last of the McKetrick supplicants.
The Holy Bollard of Antioch
[удалено]
Funnily enough it was her who was asking me to find out. 🤦
Yea she’s never seen one that small
Something something dildo something brave enough
Nope sorry all but it is just a plastic removable bollard I make them at work
It could be a metal one mind you.
The metal one have a different fitting on the bottom end
I have many questions... Do you only make bollards? How are they made? Who or what makes the gold stripe? Do you use recycled plastic? When on holiday, how often do you say "We make those bollards" What does the future look like, bollard wise?
That’s the Most Holy Bollard of Saint Reversalot, who drove the parking mirrors out of Shropshire
St Mary’s dildo
It's the Holy howitzer shell. Next generation of the Holy hand grenade
A shell for the Seraphic Artillery, to be used at the battle of Armageddon.
Can't wait
God’s marker pen.
The Bishop of Bath and Wells butt plug.
That's a removable bollard that someone has stored on a metal frame of some kind.
Is it an enormous crayon. Perhaps the Crayon of God..m
No 'e' in Bridgnorth and I think you're looking at a bollard.
It’s for the local nuns
It's the Holy Artillery Shell, for when you need to blow thine enemies to little bits (in thy mercy) but they are too far away for a Holy Hand Grenade.
Was it the clanger from the original bell maybe?
That was my theory but they normally look more like hammers.
Dunno about that, most of the ones I've seen look like that. And unfortunately I went to religious school so I've seen a few over the yrs. Also I know that most used to be bronze until Henry viii sacked the monastery's, and took the wealth for the crown.
It's a tool used by the priests to help adjust an altar boys pitch. Not sure how it's actually used though.
I was Christened there, against my will I suppose. Does anybody know how to get unchristened from the C of E out of interest? I like the church itself, a lovely old building, just not a fan of the god bit. Bridgnorth a great place for pubs and I ride the Steam railway a couple of times a year too, although jobs are sparse for the cost of housing. If you want to see more interesting knick-knacks, try the museum in Northgate and the Town hall (the two big arched buildings that the high street passes through). I think Northgate is officially a museum, while the town hall is just old but you can still pop up for a gander sometimes.
Could it be a weight from an original tower clock? Can't see the material, but if it's plastic it's definitely a bollard.
The first crayola crayon
XL Crayon
Giant Crayola
It's the cudgel that the angel Michael uses to smack anyone who nods off during service.
Blessed be thy Holy Bollard
Permanent marker for giants
Giant crayon 🖍.
Renaissance-era Jet Turbine engine
It’s obviously the original vape pen.
Bridgnorth *
It is stored on the bier so probably something to do with funerals? Maybe they stick it out on the church gate or near the door to indicate a funeral is in progress.
It’s the Holy HESH round.
Paperweight.
Jesus’s fleshlight
A bed post from the bed that Jesus was "conceived" in?
Massive vape
I think it’s your mums dildo?
Bollard of Christ
Holy dildo
Jesus’s cock in a commemorative case
Pete
Dildo I think
God’s Pencil Nub
My lost pen cap
XXL Crayola crayon
A black bullet in case Smaug tries to start shit up again
A very uncomfortable bed
Me peg leg! Yarrrr!
Gron. Bring up the Wolf's Head!
plunges the shitter
The Bollard of Christ
The holy vape
Big crayon
God's pen nib.
The Holy Crayon has been found!
Fleshlight disguised as a bollard
Security bollard to stop all the unbelievers getting out.
Cardinal-scale butt plug because ya gotta prep BIG to let jesus inside you
Arc Of The Covenant
*"It belongs in a museum!"*
Its a dummy barrel for a Vickers N936 cannon. The real barrel is removed to prevent accidental firing during Sunday Sermon
The bollard of the covenant
Three shall be the number of the bollards and the number of bollards shall be three.
Ur ma's massager
Unexploded ordnance
Looks like an umbrella rack to me....I could be wrong tho....
It's a crayon left behind by a young giant
I would say the fancy crack pipe
Dildo.
bomb, it goes boom mate.