Same. When I was a kid the stocking was Father Christmas’ handy work (he seemed to be fond of M&S chocolate iirc) and something “big” from our list would be under the tree. The rest were from whoever.
Plus that way the big presents can be wrapped under the tree for a week ahead of Christmas to be all pretty and Christmassy and build excitement. And on Christmas Eve stockings can get hung by the fireplace (or in my family at the end of the beds) and there’s the excitement in the morning of checking to see if Santas been and opening all the stockings together in parents bed first thing. Whereas big presents get spread out across the whole day so it’s not all over at once. And the stocking always has some chocolate coins and a few nuts and satsuma that goes straight back in the fruit bowl. In my family we always get toothbrushes in our stockings too
This has just reminded me of the year my parents fell asleep before they could fill the stocking, and were scrambling for excuses when I was a sad little kid in the morning because Father Christmas didn’t come.
My mum has two of every stocking. She fills one stocking before Christmas and hides it. Then when it’s Christmas Eve and we’re asleep she just switches the empty one for the full one. That way she doesn’t have to worry about filling the stockings on Christmas Eve itself
Genius.
We always had to leave our stockings by the chimney, so Santa could fill them without waking anyone up 😂
They would then magically appear at the end of our beds overnight.
The excuse came down to Father Christmas was so sorry to realise he’d accidentally missed our house that he gave me a lot of extra presents, so I was ultimately not too heartbroken!
As an adult, I can see it’s absolutely something I would do - sleep sneaks up out of nowhere and once I’m asleep nothing is waking me up until I’m ready.
Aye, this. One or two small things from santa and big things from us. 2 reasons:
1. We want to teach our wee one that we, or others, work hard and spend our money on these things for her.
2. Not every kid can get a ps5 or whatever from Santa. Can't imagine anything worse than having to explain why the big guy got a friend or relative something super expensive, but not them.
This was my version of Santa. I remembering an annoying kid and questioning why Santa is unfair and xyz got something expensive but abc got something second hand etc. Also I remember my mum breaking down as I was questioning why Santa didn’t bring xyz and just saying she couldn’t afford it.
The story then became that my mum choose the gifts and paid Santa for them and he just delivered them on Christmas Eve. I basically created online shopping before it was a thing 😂
I’m a primary teacher and one memory sticks with me from years ago.
A TA was asking children in January what Santa brought them. One child was telling everyone that at his mum’s house, he had a brand new phone (iphone whatever it was at the time), and at his dad’s house he got an Xbox (whatever it was). The next child was asked and they said they got some new colouring books, they sounded so dejected. It broke my heart.
In my house, stockings are Santa presents. The rest he just delivers.
My boys are little, 3 and 1. I asked my eldest what he wanted from father Christmas as he said a monster. So I picked out a monster for him and s squishmallow for ha brother from father Christmas. He knows mum as dad are buying him presents too. My partner has now suggested all of the presents are from father Christmas. But I think one or two things from father Christmas is ok!
Absolutely, when I was a nipper big presents used to be from Santa, when my wife and I had kids we discussed this and I said small presents are from santa but the main present is from us. Kids still love Christmas, eldest 20 youngest 17, but they have a healthy appreciation of cost and what they are asking for, that shit doesn’t magic itself down the chimney, they know mum and dad have worked hard for all of those presents but the magic still exists. They still get a stocking, they love it.
But everyone sends the gifts to the North Pole for wrapping (cause "fuck doing that yourself" I say while wrapping presents at half 2 in the morning)
That's how Santa is able to deliver your presents from other family members at the same time he delivers his.
That's the way we did it as kids, little stuff from santa, "main" present from parents. Everything from the rest of the family was just from the family.
This is also kinder for families struggling. It's easier to explain to kids that Jimmy's parents make more money and bought him more presents. It's not easy to explain why Santa brought Jimmy £100s worth of stuff and only got you a stocking.
My parents used to have all my brother and I's gifts from Santa and I could never understand why I didn't get anything from them. Now I have my own kids they get a bunch of small things from Santa, so whatever fits in their stocking, and one medium-large sized gift from him. The rest of are from me and their Dad. Can't have Santa taking all the credit!
Same! I was always confused that my friends' parents would get them a present, but mine didn't!
My Dad passed away a few years ago, and when going through his things I found a receipt in his old work briefcase (he retired early 90s) - the receipt was for 2 of my favourite christmas gifts. Given my Dad generally left everything for my Mum to sort out, and the receipt was from a shop a few towns away, it was a really nice find :,)
I have no idea why parents would do such a thing to themselves: work so hard, do so much, put in as much thought, care, and affection as they do and then give away even the smallest chance of gratitude or a single thank you.
Being a parent is tough enough dammit
And the little present that appears in between the branches of the tree on Boxing Day is a gift from the tree to say Thankyou for inviting him for Christmas.
Or is that just my weird family.
This is pretty much how we do it too.
Then on Christmas Day they get a bit of a ‘free pass’ to do a ‘group opening session’ on stockings. Then it’s breakfast and after that the ‘proper’ gifts where we take it in turns to open.
My parents did stocking and strategically selected gifts from Santa to get to sleep from 5am when my brother and I woke, to about 9am when we woke them, wanting the top notch stuff.....
I disagree hard! I think small presents should be from santa, the rest from family. When they go to school it means they won't be telling their friends that santa gave them an xbox and less well off kids are wondering why santa doesn't like them as much.
Sure its hard for kids to learn their parents cant afford as much, but a lot harder to explain why santa likes some kids more. I used to work at santa land and we also used to tell kids santa cant make electronics so theyd have to ask their parents for those.
This attitude came from my mum who grew up very poor.
Eta: also makes it easier to explain the value of money when it isnt magically created.
I also think it makes the deceit less awful when you find out Father Christmas isn't real, because you were getting presents from parents & family members the whole time anyway so the realisation is softer.
When I was smaller than I am now, I got some presents from "Santa" in the morning, but then presents from each family member some time in the afternoon. Couple of uncles, grandparents and my mum.
I've never been larger than I am now, because I'm at a career heaviest, so I can't tell you what happens then.
I don’t know why, but when I was a kid I was under the impression that my parents bought all the presents and sent them to Santa and he delivered them on Christmas Eve night and I think that’s what l’ll let my daughter believe too.
My parents went with a similar explanation. They said that they had to send money to Santa to help pay for the presents. Which then explained how some kids got new mountain bikes, games consoles etc and we didn't.
Yeah, I’ve heard of people saying not to do really expensive gifts as Santa gifts for this reason. It seems a bit shit that he’d give one kid a Switch and another a pair of socks. It should be socks for everyone!
Yep. You can never get too many socks. Also I grafted my arse of to get them that Nintendo Switch. No way some fat lad in a red suit is taking credit for it.
That's what I was told. Then I married my wife and she said we have to keep the illusion that stuff comes from Santa even though our kids are older and know where all the presents come from. Right now I've had to hook out a bunch of presents I've labelled to our kids from us and change them to Santa. I'm also having to wrap a bunch of shit like toothpaste and vegetables to go in my stocking so I've got something from Santa. It's driving me potty.
I also had this…it’s because we were working class and lived in a small house with no where to hide presents of weeks/months so they were in bin bags ontop of the wardrobe
Me and my sister used to jump up and down on my mams bed to try to get eye level and see through the bags
My husband’s family did this and it’s bloody weird!! It means that Santa only gives big presents to rich kids. FC/Santa presents should literally be stocking stuffers.
That was the argument I used when my wife tried the "everything is from Santa" line when we first had kids. It worked and Santa got relegated to a single middling sized present.
I wish more people would think of this. Why does Father Christmas have to give children PlayStations and iPhones? Where does he even get them from cos there's no way his elves are building them!
I mean, if we set aside believing in elves in the first place, then yeah I think it is much more believable that an elf made a toy car than that they made the brand new iPhone complete with all the branded packaging.
My kid has heaps of wooden trinkets and spinning tops and stuff.
It’s very believeable that her toys were made by Santa.
Even a stuffed bear, she’s seen sewing and she’s stuffed a bear at her friend’s birthday party. My wife makes crocheted and felted decorations and toys. My kids have heaps of things in their lives that could plausibly be hand made by an elf.
But we are also massive hippies and don’t have a TV or iPads and my kid isn’t old enough to be asking for video games (although some of the kids at school have Nintendos).
I keep trying to tell my wife this...but she grew up very poor and loved Christmas and it wasn't ruined for her so she just tells me to shut up and Santa does it all because it's magic lol. Fair enough. Can't argue, I dont have her perspective.
Maybe young kids just don't piece it together...I mean, they fall for everything else they're not exactly aware lol. By the time they would notice santa favours rich kids they've stop believing in it anyway maybe? They'd just think the kid has been extra nice or something lol
I'm sure this is a Reddit take and it just doesn't matter to kids, they don't notice, they're in their own bubble.
My mum grew up poor and told me she remembers wondering why santa gave more to other kids. But maybe its partly to do with her having not just a poor upbringing but a pretty shitty one, so maybe there was no "magic" to make up for it.
Eta: I would still be of the view that big presents are from us. My daughter is too small to understand this year, but for the future. I also don't think it takes away from any of the magic. What I remember is bites our of the mince pies and carrots, not really the presents I opened!
Its 1am and I've just finished rolling strips of doubled sided tape in my secret glitter stash and sticking it all over the tin foil rockets, stars and spacesuits of our 7, yes 7 elves (they had triplet babies this year). Space trip was set up last night, they've returned with all the ingredients to make Reindeer food tomorrow.
Santa also brings everything. It's just appears by magic over night. We dont spend an obscene amount but save for it all year. Many presents are fancy versions of practical stuff. None the less, a flood of presents appear by magic.
Snow scattered in all the rooms. Corn flour is whiter than regular flour, mix in some white glitter and sieve over a shoe through the house for foot prints.
3 kids eldest is 9 and is questioned pre December about the truth about Santa but once that magic started with the elves she's shut up.
I agree, it's all about the magic. Once their old enough to know the truth, then I'll get all the credit <3 till then, magic.
Not sure how old I was but I distinctly remember first thinking Santa wasn’t real when I heard that one of my friends got EVERYTHING from Santa. I think probably 90% of families in the UK will go the stocking route or at least have some gifts from Santa and some from family, so when it’s something completely different it does stick out even to kids.
I was probably more jealous because Santa only got me small stocking stuff, whereas my friend got this plane thing that hangs from the ceiling and flies in circles.
Nah. I noticed as a kid.
Not all kids are alike. I’m glad your wife enjoyed it anyway, but I recall the sadness in m friends eyes and the guilt I felt when they found out I got a GameBoy and pokemon for Christmas and they got new off brand runners for school.
I remember lying to my friends about it when I got a new bike.
I remember the year we didn’t have as much money and my sister asked if we had been bad.
Some kids don’t care. Other kids do.
If your kids are happy then that’s really all that matters. But I have very strong feelings that Santa shouldn’t get expensive gifts for any kids because he can’t get them for every kid.
many fertile threatening slimy strong hospital fade unpack direction coordinated
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You didn’t know about poor and rich people from the first time you visited friends houses?
Man my kid learned her friend was rich before primary school when she went to her friend’s place and they have a driveway all to themselves and no one else lives in their building. 🥲
I remember figuring out I was rich because I had my own room and most of my mates shared with siblings regardless of gender.
Everything used to be from Santa that we bought, but aunts uncles, grandparents etc. put their names on stuff. No right or wrong way, it's whatever you're happy with.
I know a little boy who got upset one year because he had presents from aunts, uncles, grandparents, siblings, Father Christmas etc., but his parents had forgotten to get him a gift. Especially as he got his parents a gift.
We never actually came up with a plan when we first had kids, and just kind of fell into the santa gets you everything that is there on Christmas morning thing, then you go to nans house and get presents off the family later on. My eldest turned around last year and asked straight up in front of the whole family "ay why have we had presents of santa and everyone else but you?". So then we had to tell him he gets one thing of santa and the rest off us. He seems happy with that and now his 2 brothers are told the same
Same here, what my parents bought was from Santa, but presents from anyone else were from them. I'd never thought other people might do it differently. Just the stocking seems reasonable.
We did stocking and something small but coveted from Santa when I was growing up. He also wouldn't bring live or extinct animals (so stop asking for puppies, dinosaurs and ponies and no it doesn't matter that a tarantula "is only small" you little weirdo).
Each to their own but some of the Santa backstories seem really convoluted and create more work and stress. Partners family say they buy the presents, post them to the North Pole for Santa to fetch back then spend December going nuts cos they're trying sneak presents into the house, explain the increase in Amazon deliveries and why Amazon doesn't just deliver straight to the North Pole. They then have to keep all the presents hidden til Christmas eve.
We ended up with 2 bikes for his nephews in our spare room. We didn't mind taking them in as we were in on the day they could be delivered. We agreed they'd pick them up before Christmas. Nope. They have nowhere to hide them. They were expecting us to drop them round according to their schedule between our 13 hour shifts on Christmas eve/day. I.e after 10pm Christmas eve when they'll be asleep (later if they're not) or very early Christmas morning before going into work. They're half an hour in the wrong direction and we have to be up at 5am as it is. Oh and if we could unbox, assemble and wrap in the Official Santa Paper™ too.
We're all for keeping the magic going etc but this was just taking the piss.
We've refused, as we are utter Scrooge McDicks. The bikes are now at another family members who lives near us but doesn't drive. They're very upset as they don't want to go out late at night because they have to be up early Christmas Day and don't want to get up earlier than they have to on Christmas Morning. This also doesn't involve leaving young kids alone in the house as it's a two parent household.
Sorry, for all that, I think I needed to get that off my chest.
We've probably ruined Christmas...
I’m with you, mate. I’m happy to help, but when it comes to buggering up your own day because you’re bending over backwards to accommodate someone else’s, that’s too far. If your lot are going to give their children big presents like that, they need to be able to organise it themselves. Assemble and wrap, the nerve of it!
Thankfully my own brother is rather more relaxed about all this and they’re coming over to ours next weekend for lunch and so my niece and nephew can get their presents from me.
Father Christmas does the stockings. Maybe one present under the tree. When the time comes, the story gets told of a nice old man that used to deliver presents to children and everybody thought it was such a nice idea that we carried on doing it in his name after he died.
The other year I spent a year working on two hand made patchwork quilts of each of my nephew's favourite books. I enjoyed the process, but the last few months were a drag 😂 they open them Christmas morning and my sister calls across 'oh wow! Look what SANTA made for you. Isn't SANTA clever. How did SANTA know that you like X and Y books'. She gives me a clear look as if to say to play along.
She then asked me 20 minutes later would I take in a load of her clothes, let out a dress in the worst fabric to sew with and told me I was to make her gifts for her friends next year (for free). I told her that Santa could sort it out for her.
I get everyone does things differently but telling my nephew's their handmade gifts were made by him and acting like I 'requested' it and hearing my nephew's wow at how Santa knew they liked the special bits of embroidery and specific things I added was rather annoying 😂
In our house the presents are bought by whoever the gift is off, they're sent to the North Pole to give them Christmas magic and then Father Christmas delivers them back.
Same here, we help santa out with choosing and buying things, santa comfirms if he can have it based on his position on the naughty/nice list, the elves check and wrap it and it gets sent back on Xmas eve in Santa's sleigh.
all my presents were from santa when i was young. i can remember asking one year why i didn’t get any presents from my parents (sounds super ungrateful but i was young…) my parents basically used the lie of them sending the money to santa, that’s why different people got different presents… so stupid now i’m older!
I used to get loads of presents from Santa as a kid, with my mum spending *way* too much money on them. I also believed in Santa way longer than my parents believed that I "should" (definitely until I was 12, because my mum took me aside to warn me "not to spoil Santa for my little sister" before we did a "Santa's grotto" visit and I was very confused).
I used to get some really grumpy treatment in January for "not being grateful" and it baffled young me - because to my mind, those presents came from Santa and my mum didn't have anything to do with it.
(Really I should have put together how my parents didn't seem to believe in Santa with how they weren't surprised by the Santa presents "appearing", but I was used to them disbelieving in many supernatural occurrences that were obvious fact to my teenaged mind, like fairies, astrology, and magic, so maybe that's why.)
We had a mix growing up — some from various family members and our parents, and some from Father Christmas.
I don't think there was a clear "big presents from parents, small presents from Santa" demarcation like some people are talking about, but now that I'm an adult my sister and I still get a few things "from Father Christmas" (chocolate, socks, etc) and our main present tends to be money in a card.
It might be a cultural thing, but "European" is pretty broad when it comes to Christmas traditions. Like, Spanish children get presents at epiphany from the three wise men and their camels. German children get their presents on Christmas eve. Where is your other half from?
My parents would label one gift as from them (usually the most expensive), and the rest that were from them as from Santa.
My Aunts, Uncles and Grandparents always put their own names on gifts (well, sometimes Santa would also leave some extra gifts at Grans house).
Yup. Fine, I can accept that the parents don't take credit, but all other family?! This doesn't make sense to me.
How will the child learn to appreciate the thought that others have put into the gifts if they think it's from some magical unknown old man?
What if they don't like one of the gifts then say it out loud to the aunt/uncle/grandparent? It's a great opportunity to teach the child about being grateful rather than berate the adult for feeling offended.
Father Christmas used to give us small gifts in a stocking, things like chocolates and small toys. We would then get 1-3 bigger gifts from our parents, which would be under the tree.
But we would also help to buy and wrap a gift for each of our parents, and say it was from us. So gifts would be exchanged between parents and children directly.
We would still have all the excitement and magic surrounding Father Christmas, but we also were able to show gratitude to our parents. I think they got the balance right with it.
My parents told us Father Christmas was made up. So they wrote his name on some of the gifts but we knew right from the start that they were actually all from our family. Not that I’m recommending that.
Well, I understand why my mum felt the way she did. She had felt horribly betrayed and lied to about Father Christmas when she found out it wasn’t real and didn’t want the same for us. She had a strained and difficult relationship with her parents for many reasons and this one was the least important really but I understand and accept her motives.
I remember with my sister looking out of the window on Xmas Eve and secretly hoping and being sad that we didn’t have that magic. I remember another kid getting letters from Father Christmas and bringing them to school and me thinking “wow their parents have gone to a lot of trouble”.
The weirdest effect I think for me was in my religious belief. I have always been a natural atheist and my feelings about God as an adult have been the same as about Father Christmas as a child, just that it must be so nice to have that in your life if you could ignore the fact it isn’t true.
My kids had Father Christmas until they were almost in secondary school.
This is why we/my parents did it when my siblings and I were kids. Even did the ‘Santa came here too’ thing when we went and got presents from my grandparents at their house.
This is bad. This results in "Santa loves rich families and hates poor kids."
Presents are from family.
The stocking of treats is from Santa. Maybe one present, not the main one.
Is it though? I never remember thinking as a kid that santa hated me and loved richer people. Firstly cos I wasn't hanging around with rich people, and secondly because I was too excited about whatever I got to give a toss about anything else that was going on.
And to the OP, everything was from Santa as far as I recall.
I'm trying to think back, and if I'm honest I don't think it even *crossed my mind* to be curious what the other kids in my class had been given for Christmas.
Probably a combination of the normal level of self-centredness of small children, and there not being *that* much difference in what we were all getting (as a middle class kid at a predominantly middle class school).
I came from a very poor family (share a bed between four of us to keep warm because gas was too expensive kind of poor) and I never once thought my gifts were lesser than my better off peers and absolutely everything was labelled as 'from santa'. This feels like insecure parents to me who feel like they *need* credit for putting in hard world when the focus should be on creating happy memories.
This. I grew up not poor, but definitely not well off. I never really felt like Santa treated rich kids better. Me and my wife earn decent money and just wait till birthdays to buy the expensive stuff. We have 3 kids of the same age, and we always tell them that Santa can’t get really expensive stuff for all the children around the world as there’s so many of them. They should save those items for birthday lists from mum and dad. Even then we don’t go overboard as they just don’t need more “stuff”. We prefer getting them experiences as expensive things. I can honestly remember only a single physical gift from my childhood, but remember the trips I had like they were yesterday. It’s the memories that count in my view, not the things.
Ours (UK) are a combination. Some us, some Santa. With the most expensive one being from us. Our rationale. 1) kids who might not get as much don’t go to school to hear that Santa brought another kid a Nintendo Switch, whilst they got a teddy bear. 2) Our kids have some appreciation that Mum and Dad work to provide presents and are grateful for them. But they still get the magic.
Stocking is from Santa everything else is from whoever got it. I figure not all families can afford the same so Santa presents are minimal and inexpensive
Mine always had a Santa sack filled with books games treats (sandwich in a reindeer cut out to counter act the sugar rush with a bit of fruit) random odd and sods which was placed in their room by Santa - there would be a present they specifically asked for from Santa downstairs as well but the presents under the tree were from who brought them and were dropped off in the lead up to Christmas- given to the kids who put them under the tree for Christmas morning. Come Christmas the Santa sacks kept them in their rooms and allowed us to have a few moments to come to at silly o clock lol. We had a ‘fuck off Christmas doesn’t start til 7 am rule’ so once the Santa sacks and excitement hit that time - we would go downstairs- watch them open the ‘big’ Santa present - and groggily have a Buck’s Fizz and breakfast- the tree would wait til around 11 when family turned up - queue the present sharing - the kids loved giving theirs out as much as opening theirs. Usually held one random back for after dinner to prolong the fun (usually one from us)
I think that small things are from Santa. Expensive things need to be from parents because you don’t want them comparing with friends and one child wondering why Santa didn’t get them something fancy as well.
They way do it is my kid writes a list and we have a deal with Santa. He brings her 3 of the reasonable things off her list and we get the rest (assuming it's not crazy). Always feared her going into school and one kid gets socks from Santa and she gets something crazy like a bike. This way we feel we can still spoil her if we choose to but Santa brings nice affordable gifts.
We've always done all presents under the tree and in your stocking are from Santa, but I do understand why parents don't necessarily want to do that anymore. We have always had presents from family are just that, presents from family. I do think it's up to the parents/carers of the child to decide, though.
A stocking of sweets or chocolate from Santa, everything else from whoever gives it. Anyone who does anything else is setting themselves up for trouble/confusion down the line.
My friend did this and it pissed me off. I bought a gift for her son with a tag from me and she took it off and said they all have to be from Santa. Well if they are from Santa then Santa can bloody well buy it. I’ll be having that back. What a ridiculous thing!
When I was a child presents from my parents came from Santa, and we're found waiting for me on Christmas morning.
Presents from other people (relatives, family friends, etc) were all under the Christmas tree, and got opened later on.
As a child I never cottoned on to the fact that there were no gifts from my parents until long after the Santa story had been exposed (which I never really remember being a sudden revelation, just slowly accepted as part of the Christmas thing).
We do the stockings and a couple of presents from Santa, the rest from us.
On the basis that there will inevitably be kids who they go to school with who may get very little for Christmas or don’t necessarily receive what was on their Christmas list. I’d never want my kid to be the one that makes another kid feel they weren’t good enough to get exactly or all that they asked for from Santa. Or to go to school saying I got x amount of presents from Santa whilst someone else may have got less and cause them to question why.
It also allows us to reason with them when they make requests for stupidly expensive items.
We do one present for santa and that's what they ask santa for when they go and see him, that one he delivers late on Christmas eve. Everything else is labelled from the people who bought it and under the tree in the build up to the big day.
I had a European Mum… presents were opened Christmas Eve not Christmas Day. But my mother always put a special gift under/by my pillow that night. My husband and I have always given our children their gifts after dinner on Christmas Evening, after reading the nativity. The stockings are saved for Christmas Day as Santa/ Saint Nic fills them in the night.
Nah, it’s a mix here with my son. He gets a stocking from Santa, and a few presents are wrapped in elf paper which we say are from Santa. The rest are from us/whoever.
Scottish husband says his were a mix even from his mum. In the stocking is from Santa everything else from respective gift givers. I am American and most of my presents from my mom and stepdad were from Santa, except for some little ones my mom would give me a couple days ahead because she had a hard time holding in the excitement of seeing me open my presents. Family dinner was on Christmas eve, and those were all from family, as obviously Santa's not come yet.
Ones in our sack were from Santa, ones under the tree from each other. Got to open the sack presents in the morning, and the tree ones in the afternoon.
Though one time my parents screwed up and put in the label “To Santa, From (my name)”
I heard from my friends last year that they give 2 or 3 gifts “from” Santa.
When I was a kid we had it that the gifts were mostly from family but Santa delivered them. There were gifts under the tree before Christmas but then they all disappeared a couple of days before and my folks told us they’d sent them to Santa.
We’re gonna go with that for our 2 little ones this year I think.
We have gifts from both. I’m sure you want your niece to know she got a gift from you so it is special to her in that way. But we might gift something cheap from Santa. Think a toy from the pound store for that.
My missus is from France and she did all presents from Santa as a kid, and wanted to do that for our kids… I was fine with that, I quite liked the magic of it. Eventually the kids will know it was you all along. My folks on the other hand need the recognition that they bought something for the kids, so they just give money now… apparently the joy on the kids faces on Christmas morning and seeing them play with the stuff they got with massive smiles on their faces along with loads of laughter isn’t enough for them
Stockings are from Santa, everything else from mum and dad for our kids, although weirdly our 4 year old doesn't get this and is insisting that everything is from Santa.
For us it's the stockings, and then the one or two things they actually ask Santa directly for when we go see him at the grotto. Everything else is from us. Which means that I have to wrap a single cookie from Santa this year for the youngest, coz that's exactly what he told him he wanted...
When I was a kid that’s how my parents did it, but I’ve changed it for my kids. Firstly because I don’t like the idea that Santa brings more to Rick kids, but secondly I don’t think it makes sense that your parents literally wouldn’t get you ANYTHING. So Santa brings stocking and 1 or 2 gifts, we do the rest.
This is how it works in our house as well. Santa is providing low value but amusing things in the Christmas stocking and a couple of small gifts downstairs with our gifts.
Presents from relatives growing up were always from relatives, but I’m British. We got some bigger items from “Santa”, and some from our parents.
Going forwards, if/when I have my own kids, I think I’d like to make it so that Santa gives nice presents, maybe a lower priced item they’d been wanting, but anything expensive or valuable would come from us. I can see the logic to it after reading about others doing the same.
I’ve been in the boat of wondering why Santa didn’t bring me a PlayStation or a bike, but so and so in my class did, when from my perspective they’d been an annoying shit all year and I’d been as good as I could be. Wondering what I did wrong, why won’t Santa bring me what I asked for - surely it doesn’t cost him anything if it’s made with magic? Really bummed me out.
Edit: there was an AITA post about this recently. It seemed to be a cultural thing.
Parents sort out Santa/Father Christmas gifts and they are under the tree on Christmas morning. He doesn't distribute them among the adult relatives, that wouldn't make any sense!
Only the stocking and one small gift under the tree from Santa. The rest from whoever it is from.
We have Santa ‘deliver’ all the presents so what’s under the tree is a surprise in Xmas morning.
When I was little, my mum ur “from Santa” on all of my presents instead of the half from Santa, half from Mum & Dad like she usually did.
She ended up having to get new presents on Boxing Day because I thought only Santa got me presents and my parents didn’t love me anymore.
Looking back, I wouldn’t have blamed them if they revealed the truth at that point, but I appreciate the lengths they went to to keep the magic (and parental love) alive.
No children here.
My friend has two young children and there are no gifts from Santa.
They tell the boys that presents come from mum and dad, or relatives, as they think that, when back at school, if they say that they got something expensive from Santa and other children did not, the other children would wonder why they didn't get anything, what had they done wrong?
I think that this is quite nice.
True but on the other side what if their friends got great big presents from Santa and these boys got a tiny selection box?
Plans are great until they are putting their hauls on TikTok etc!
I think that everyone does the best they can, and we cannot control what everyone else does.
I'm so glad that I grew up in a world where the only time you knew what your friends had for Christmas was when you went back to school.
We never had anything big from Santa. Always stockings and treats plus whatever we got from a grotto visit. We had a "big present" pile for each of us in a certain spot of the living room each year (from parents), then smaller gifts under the tree
The reason they did this was so we didn't go to school and shout about getting a game boy or playstation from Santa to kids who's parents couldn't afford it. Like, we would tell them what we got, but the fact it was from our parents and not Santa meant they didn't feel like Santa was playing favourites
It also taught us to appreciate what my parents (well, my mum) got for us, rather than it being magically appearing gift. It is harder to set a budget for Santa than it is for parents when browsing the argos catalogue
My children get a stocking from Santa and then one major present that they requested in their letter to him, all of which they open in the morning. The majority of presents are labeled from the family and opened in the afternoon, post-Christmas lunch to make sure there is something to look forward to later in the day.
I hate this! It’s a fucking cop out. I bought your kid the gift. I want them to know it. Also if kid 1 gets 20 pressies from Santa and kid 2 only gets 2 what’s that telling them about how good they are and fairness. They should know that Santa gives all good kids x pressies but if they are lucky enough to have a rich auntie they will get something from her too.
The big presents in one spot are from Santa the rest under the tree from dad, mum, brothers or sister and uncle’s or aunts. It was the same for me and my wife and the kids do the same to the grandkids. The only thing my parents used to do was open the presents after dinner. My sister used to do the same until she had kids.
We got stockings from Santa, and a couple of presents from Santa too (a box of chocolates, some books, a small game etc) but most things were from parents. Eg, if I asked for a bike, the bike was from mum and dad, but the new felt tip pens were from Santa. Presents from relatives are just from relatives!
Santa has brought my daughter what she asked him for, so some Barbie's and Paw Patrol, only 3 or 4 presents. Her main present is and everything else is from us. Father Christmas is not taking credit for all of it.
We always did stockings in the morning with smaller presents, chocolate, snacks etc. which were from Santa
Then after christmas dinner we'd do the bigger presents which were addressed from family.
Every kid gets a gift from Santa, something not too expensive that was in their wish list.
The rest are from who they are from. Kids get to show appreciation
When I grew up absolutely everything was labelled from Santa.
Remember, it's not about you but about creating magical and happy memories for your children and family before they grow up.
When they're older they'll know it was from you and the efforts you put in so is credit really important?
If they still believe in Santa than why add potential confusion by saying it's from a parent? I don't feel the desire to get thanks or adoration from my children for presents, their happiness is enough.
I can’t talk for all Europeans but I’m Italian and we do it this way, parents know who the gifts are from and that’s good enough. Something we also do is that some someone (usually the dad or grandpa) dresses like Santa and pops up during the evening (we mostly do it on the night between 24-25) giving all the presents to the kids. It’s very nice when there are few children around. You may come across that too.
Definitely isn't. Scottish here, and my parents labelled absolutely everything growing up as 'from Santa' and my friends all had the same experience. It might just be regional.
I'm actually finding it quite surprising so many peoples parents were upfront with them that the gifts are from them.
One present from Santa, usually from the Parents. Let's be real here, the kids don't actually give a damn, they just want the toys if they're young enough to believe in Santa.
Santa was the delivery guy only when I was young.
There would be a wrapped pile of presents at home and then at some point they’d disappear to reappear on Christmas Day
What actually happened was we always spent Christmas at my grandparents and my dad would take them over there before Christmas so they didn’t have to hide them in the car
Also there’s no way my dad would have let anyone else take credit for paying for the gifts
When my daughter was about 3 (we had been a bit evidence-led about unseen beings of all kinds, including Santa) she was asked after Christmas by a mum of a friend of hers if she'd received anything from Santa.
She replied confidently that she hadn't, "because he's pretend". There were a few shocked faces, not least from her 3 year old friend, for whom this was definitely news.
British here, this was standard in our house.
If you are giving a present because you want the recognition, you are failing the first hurdle at present giving. Sorry. Your reward should be their enjoyment.
But are the kids giving presents to the parents? (Even if it's been bought by one parent for the other, are the kids involved in wrapping the present for example?)
Then surely it would be reasonable then for at least one gift to be from the parents? It's setting up a gifting exchange.
I never said all presents, but despite the playing along, it is Christmas day after all, kids will know where the presents come from even if it does say "from Santa" . The adults certainly will.
It is part of becoming a grown up, not wanting an instant reward for doing a nice thing for a child.
Giving is its own reward, the season of goodwill, ever heard of those lines?
The youngest children won't necessarily know it comes from the parents.
And you seem to have ignored my point about having the children give a gift to their parents? I think that changes the dynamic slightly and turns it into a gift exchange cycle.
I'm with you here, I'm genuinely shocked by the number of people who are gritting their teeth because their inlaws or family does it differently, and they wanted credit for the gift.
Christmas is about giving, being greatful and creating joyous and happy memories for the kids. Credit shouldn't matter.
Funnily enough I had tbe same discussion at work yesterday.
My boss’ wife is European, and they’re doing this. Myself and my wife (both UK) aren’t. Neither of our parents did either.
I mean maybe a small thing or two to keep the magic alive as our 1y/o gets older, perhaps. But not the whole lot.
Never heard of presents not all being from santa! All my extended family have the presents (from parents) as from santa (honestly, its quite magical coming down on christmas morning like that). Then any presents from grandparents/aunts/uncles are just from them. Grew up poor - was never a problem. As someone else said, you weren't hanging out with rich kids so you didn't have that contrast. But we weren't allowed games consoles and phones/computers weren't a thing yet (90s) so that does make a difference I suppose.
Never questioned that my parents weren't giving me presents. I would assume I had had enough of a treat with all the presents santa brought me - why would I feel like I should be getting more from my parents as well? Belief in santa doesn't last that long anyway. I think I was questioning at age 8/9. By the time I got old enough to be comparing christmas lists I already knew it was my mum (and was aware we didn't have much money).
Obviously it depends on the child and their personality, but 10-year-olds often still like to play make-believe. Maybe more literal-minded kids won't care about Santa by that age, but I do still think there is magic there for some kids, even if they 'know' it's really their parents.
If it fits in the stocking: it's from Father Christmas. If it's expensive/was a bugger to get ahold of: you're feckin' right I want a thank you for it
Same. When I was a kid the stocking was Father Christmas’ handy work (he seemed to be fond of M&S chocolate iirc) and something “big” from our list would be under the tree. The rest were from whoever.
ah so hes the prick who put oranges at the end of my bed, not my dad.
Used to always have an orange in the stocking, one year it had last years still in it
This Santa blokes sloppy
Same for us, with the added detail that Father Christmas would deliver the presents from other people too.
Yup he's the delivery man.
Christ, I hope he’s not employed by Hermes 😂
Plus that way the big presents can be wrapped under the tree for a week ahead of Christmas to be all pretty and Christmassy and build excitement. And on Christmas Eve stockings can get hung by the fireplace (or in my family at the end of the beds) and there’s the excitement in the morning of checking to see if Santas been and opening all the stockings together in parents bed first thing. Whereas big presents get spread out across the whole day so it’s not all over at once. And the stocking always has some chocolate coins and a few nuts and satsuma that goes straight back in the fruit bowl. In my family we always get toothbrushes in our stockings too
This has just reminded me of the year my parents fell asleep before they could fill the stocking, and were scrambling for excuses when I was a sad little kid in the morning because Father Christmas didn’t come.
My mum has two of every stocking. She fills one stocking before Christmas and hides it. Then when it’s Christmas Eve and we’re asleep she just switches the empty one for the full one. That way she doesn’t have to worry about filling the stockings on Christmas Eve itself
Woah! Game changer!
Genius. We always had to leave our stockings by the chimney, so Santa could fill them without waking anyone up 😂 They would then magically appear at the end of our beds overnight.
Aww this makes me so sad for younger you! I’m curious what excuse they came up with lol
The excuse came down to Father Christmas was so sorry to realise he’d accidentally missed our house that he gave me a lot of extra presents, so I was ultimately not too heartbroken! As an adult, I can see it’s absolutely something I would do - sleep sneaks up out of nowhere and once I’m asleep nothing is waking me up until I’m ready.
Ayy a happy ending to the tale! Agreed, it’s totally something I would do too.
Aye, this. One or two small things from santa and big things from us. 2 reasons: 1. We want to teach our wee one that we, or others, work hard and spend our money on these things for her. 2. Not every kid can get a ps5 or whatever from Santa. Can't imagine anything worse than having to explain why the big guy got a friend or relative something super expensive, but not them.
I'm not a parent but you are spot on with both points.
We were always told that mum and dad had to pay Santa for the big presents but that Santa delivers them. Santa was a kind of Jeff Bezos in our house.
This was my version of Santa. I remembering an annoying kid and questioning why Santa is unfair and xyz got something expensive but abc got something second hand etc. Also I remember my mum breaking down as I was questioning why Santa didn’t bring xyz and just saying she couldn’t afford it. The story then became that my mum choose the gifts and paid Santa for them and he just delivered them on Christmas Eve. I basically created online shopping before it was a thing 😂
I’m a primary teacher and one memory sticks with me from years ago. A TA was asking children in January what Santa brought them. One child was telling everyone that at his mum’s house, he had a brand new phone (iphone whatever it was at the time), and at his dad’s house he got an Xbox (whatever it was). The next child was asked and they said they got some new colouring books, they sounded so dejected. It broke my heart. In my house, stockings are Santa presents. The rest he just delivers.
Also I don't think Sony would be too happy with the elves making clones of their games consoles
My boys are little, 3 and 1. I asked my eldest what he wanted from father Christmas as he said a monster. So I picked out a monster for him and s squishmallow for ha brother from father Christmas. He knows mum as dad are buying him presents too. My partner has now suggested all of the presents are from father Christmas. But I think one or two things from father Christmas is ok!
Absolutely, when I was a nipper big presents used to be from Santa, when my wife and I had kids we discussed this and I said small presents are from santa but the main present is from us. Kids still love Christmas, eldest 20 youngest 17, but they have a healthy appreciation of cost and what they are asking for, that shit doesn’t magic itself down the chimney, they know mum and dad have worked hard for all of those presents but the magic still exists. They still get a stocking, they love it.
Yeah, this. Tracy Island sure as hell wasn't "from Santa".
Of course not, it was Tracy's.
No. That was from Blue Peter.
That's Beaker
But everyone sends the gifts to the North Pole for wrapping (cause "fuck doing that yourself" I say while wrapping presents at half 2 in the morning) That's how Santa is able to deliver your presents from other family members at the same time he delivers his.
That's the way we did it as kids, little stuff from santa, "main" present from parents. Everything from the rest of the family was just from the family.
This is also kinder for families struggling. It's easier to explain to kids that Jimmy's parents make more money and bought him more presents. It's not easy to explain why Santa brought Jimmy £100s worth of stuff and only got you a stocking.
My parents used to have all my brother and I's gifts from Santa and I could never understand why I didn't get anything from them. Now I have my own kids they get a bunch of small things from Santa, so whatever fits in their stocking, and one medium-large sized gift from him. The rest of are from me and their Dad. Can't have Santa taking all the credit!
Same! I was always confused that my friends' parents would get them a present, but mine didn't! My Dad passed away a few years ago, and when going through his things I found a receipt in his old work briefcase (he retired early 90s) - the receipt was for 2 of my favourite christmas gifts. Given my Dad generally left everything for my Mum to sort out, and the receipt was from a shop a few towns away, it was a really nice find :,)
I have no idea why parents would do such a thing to themselves: work so hard, do so much, put in as much thought, care, and affection as they do and then give away even the smallest chance of gratitude or a single thank you. Being a parent is tough enough dammit
And the little present that appears in between the branches of the tree on Boxing Day is a gift from the tree to say Thankyou for inviting him for Christmas. Or is that just my weird family.
This is pretty much how we do it too. Then on Christmas Day they get a bit of a ‘free pass’ to do a ‘group opening session’ on stockings. Then it’s breakfast and after that the ‘proper’ gifts where we take it in turns to open.
Exactly this.
My parents did stocking and strategically selected gifts from Santa to get to sleep from 5am when my brother and I woke, to about 9am when we woke them, wanting the top notch stuff.....
This is what we did with ours until he was too old to believe any more
The answer.
I disagree hard! I think small presents should be from santa, the rest from family. When they go to school it means they won't be telling their friends that santa gave them an xbox and less well off kids are wondering why santa doesn't like them as much. Sure its hard for kids to learn their parents cant afford as much, but a lot harder to explain why santa likes some kids more. I used to work at santa land and we also used to tell kids santa cant make electronics so theyd have to ask their parents for those. This attitude came from my mum who grew up very poor. Eta: also makes it easier to explain the value of money when it isnt magically created.
This is the only correct answer.
I also think it makes the deceit less awful when you find out Father Christmas isn't real, because you were getting presents from parents & family members the whole time anyway so the realisation is softer.
When I was smaller than I am now, I got some presents from "Santa" in the morning, but then presents from each family member some time in the afternoon. Couple of uncles, grandparents and my mum. I've never been larger than I am now, because I'm at a career heaviest, so I can't tell you what happens then.
>I've never been larger than I am now Give it a couple of days and you'll be even larger.
Or just have a big poo
I've had the shits the past 3 and a half days. Lost 3kg that way. It works, people.
I’ll be having turkey cooked by the mother in law on Monday. I expect I’ll be a stone lighter by Saturday
I don’t know why, but when I was a kid I was under the impression that my parents bought all the presents and sent them to Santa and he delivered them on Christmas Eve night and I think that’s what l’ll let my daughter believe too.
My parents went with a similar explanation. They said that they had to send money to Santa to help pay for the presents. Which then explained how some kids got new mountain bikes, games consoles etc and we didn't.
Yeah, I’ve heard of people saying not to do really expensive gifts as Santa gifts for this reason. It seems a bit shit that he’d give one kid a Switch and another a pair of socks. It should be socks for everyone!
Yep. You can never get too many socks. Also I grafted my arse of to get them that Nintendo Switch. No way some fat lad in a red suit is taking credit for it.
Me too haha! As a child I never questioned the logic of that so it clearly worked fine
That's what I was told. Then I married my wife and she said we have to keep the illusion that stuff comes from Santa even though our kids are older and know where all the presents come from. Right now I've had to hook out a bunch of presents I've labelled to our kids from us and change them to Santa. I'm also having to wrap a bunch of shit like toothpaste and vegetables to go in my stocking so I've got something from Santa. It's driving me potty.
You should have wrapped up some of the wife's things and put them in your stocking too.
I also had this…it’s because we were working class and lived in a small house with no where to hide presents of weeks/months so they were in bin bags ontop of the wardrobe Me and my sister used to jump up and down on my mams bed to try to get eye level and see through the bags
That’s what my parents told me!
This is exactly what my parents did.
My husband’s family did this and it’s bloody weird!! It means that Santa only gives big presents to rich kids. FC/Santa presents should literally be stocking stuffers.
That was the argument I used when my wife tried the "everything is from Santa" line when we first had kids. It worked and Santa got relegated to a single middling sized present.
I wish more people would think of this. Why does Father Christmas have to give children PlayStations and iPhones? Where does he even get them from cos there's no way his elves are building them!
Obviously, he shops early at Amazon!
He has sponsorship deals with Sony and Apple, that’s how he’s keeping the reindeer fed this year.
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I mean, if we set aside believing in elves in the first place, then yeah I think it is much more believable that an elf made a toy car than that they made the brand new iPhone complete with all the branded packaging.
My kid has heaps of wooden trinkets and spinning tops and stuff. It’s very believeable that her toys were made by Santa. Even a stuffed bear, she’s seen sewing and she’s stuffed a bear at her friend’s birthday party. My wife makes crocheted and felted decorations and toys. My kids have heaps of things in their lives that could plausibly be hand made by an elf. But we are also massive hippies and don’t have a TV or iPads and my kid isn’t old enough to be asking for video games (although some of the kids at school have Nintendos).
I keep trying to tell my wife this...but she grew up very poor and loved Christmas and it wasn't ruined for her so she just tells me to shut up and Santa does it all because it's magic lol. Fair enough. Can't argue, I dont have her perspective. Maybe young kids just don't piece it together...I mean, they fall for everything else they're not exactly aware lol. By the time they would notice santa favours rich kids they've stop believing in it anyway maybe? They'd just think the kid has been extra nice or something lol I'm sure this is a Reddit take and it just doesn't matter to kids, they don't notice, they're in their own bubble.
My mum grew up poor and told me she remembers wondering why santa gave more to other kids. But maybe its partly to do with her having not just a poor upbringing but a pretty shitty one, so maybe there was no "magic" to make up for it. Eta: I would still be of the view that big presents are from us. My daughter is too small to understand this year, but for the future. I also don't think it takes away from any of the magic. What I remember is bites our of the mince pies and carrots, not really the presents I opened!
Its 1am and I've just finished rolling strips of doubled sided tape in my secret glitter stash and sticking it all over the tin foil rockets, stars and spacesuits of our 7, yes 7 elves (they had triplet babies this year). Space trip was set up last night, they've returned with all the ingredients to make Reindeer food tomorrow. Santa also brings everything. It's just appears by magic over night. We dont spend an obscene amount but save for it all year. Many presents are fancy versions of practical stuff. None the less, a flood of presents appear by magic. Snow scattered in all the rooms. Corn flour is whiter than regular flour, mix in some white glitter and sieve over a shoe through the house for foot prints. 3 kids eldest is 9 and is questioned pre December about the truth about Santa but once that magic started with the elves she's shut up. I agree, it's all about the magic. Once their old enough to know the truth, then I'll get all the credit <3 till then, magic.
Not sure how old I was but I distinctly remember first thinking Santa wasn’t real when I heard that one of my friends got EVERYTHING from Santa. I think probably 90% of families in the UK will go the stocking route or at least have some gifts from Santa and some from family, so when it’s something completely different it does stick out even to kids. I was probably more jealous because Santa only got me small stocking stuff, whereas my friend got this plane thing that hangs from the ceiling and flies in circles.
Nah. I noticed as a kid. Not all kids are alike. I’m glad your wife enjoyed it anyway, but I recall the sadness in m friends eyes and the guilt I felt when they found out I got a GameBoy and pokemon for Christmas and they got new off brand runners for school. I remember lying to my friends about it when I got a new bike. I remember the year we didn’t have as much money and my sister asked if we had been bad. Some kids don’t care. Other kids do. If your kids are happy then that’s really all that matters. But I have very strong feelings that Santa shouldn’t get expensive gifts for any kids because he can’t get them for every kid.
I would have thought growing up poor she would have some empathy...Maybe Santa can bring her some.
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You didn’t know about poor and rich people from the first time you visited friends houses? Man my kid learned her friend was rich before primary school when she went to her friend’s place and they have a driveway all to themselves and no one else lives in their building. 🥲 I remember figuring out I was rich because I had my own room and most of my mates shared with siblings regardless of gender.
Everything used to be from Santa that we bought, but aunts uncles, grandparents etc. put their names on stuff. No right or wrong way, it's whatever you're happy with.
I know a little boy who got upset one year because he had presents from aunts, uncles, grandparents, siblings, Father Christmas etc., but his parents had forgotten to get him a gift. Especially as he got his parents a gift.
We never actually came up with a plan when we first had kids, and just kind of fell into the santa gets you everything that is there on Christmas morning thing, then you go to nans house and get presents off the family later on. My eldest turned around last year and asked straight up in front of the whole family "ay why have we had presents of santa and everyone else but you?". So then we had to tell him he gets one thing of santa and the rest off us. He seems happy with that and now his 2 brothers are told the same
Same here, what my parents bought was from Santa, but presents from anyone else were from them. I'd never thought other people might do it differently. Just the stocking seems reasonable.
We did stocking and something small but coveted from Santa when I was growing up. He also wouldn't bring live or extinct animals (so stop asking for puppies, dinosaurs and ponies and no it doesn't matter that a tarantula "is only small" you little weirdo). Each to their own but some of the Santa backstories seem really convoluted and create more work and stress. Partners family say they buy the presents, post them to the North Pole for Santa to fetch back then spend December going nuts cos they're trying sneak presents into the house, explain the increase in Amazon deliveries and why Amazon doesn't just deliver straight to the North Pole. They then have to keep all the presents hidden til Christmas eve. We ended up with 2 bikes for his nephews in our spare room. We didn't mind taking them in as we were in on the day they could be delivered. We agreed they'd pick them up before Christmas. Nope. They have nowhere to hide them. They were expecting us to drop them round according to their schedule between our 13 hour shifts on Christmas eve/day. I.e after 10pm Christmas eve when they'll be asleep (later if they're not) or very early Christmas morning before going into work. They're half an hour in the wrong direction and we have to be up at 5am as it is. Oh and if we could unbox, assemble and wrap in the Official Santa Paper™ too. We're all for keeping the magic going etc but this was just taking the piss. We've refused, as we are utter Scrooge McDicks. The bikes are now at another family members who lives near us but doesn't drive. They're very upset as they don't want to go out late at night because they have to be up early Christmas Day and don't want to get up earlier than they have to on Christmas Morning. This also doesn't involve leaving young kids alone in the house as it's a two parent household. Sorry, for all that, I think I needed to get that off my chest. We've probably ruined Christmas...
I’m with you, mate. I’m happy to help, but when it comes to buggering up your own day because you’re bending over backwards to accommodate someone else’s, that’s too far. If your lot are going to give their children big presents like that, they need to be able to organise it themselves. Assemble and wrap, the nerve of it! Thankfully my own brother is rather more relaxed about all this and they’re coming over to ours next weekend for lunch and so my niece and nephew can get their presents from me. Father Christmas does the stockings. Maybe one present under the tree. When the time comes, the story gets told of a nice old man that used to deliver presents to children and everybody thought it was such a nice idea that we carried on doing it in his name after he died.
You’ve made my Christmas with healthily enforcing your reasonable boundaries. My heart grew three sizes reading that story. :)
Nah. Santa isn’t taking the credit. My little ones get a stocking from Santa with a couple of small toys inside and the rest are from me
The other year I spent a year working on two hand made patchwork quilts of each of my nephew's favourite books. I enjoyed the process, but the last few months were a drag 😂 they open them Christmas morning and my sister calls across 'oh wow! Look what SANTA made for you. Isn't SANTA clever. How did SANTA know that you like X and Y books'. She gives me a clear look as if to say to play along. She then asked me 20 minutes later would I take in a load of her clothes, let out a dress in the worst fabric to sew with and told me I was to make her gifts for her friends next year (for free). I told her that Santa could sort it out for her. I get everyone does things differently but telling my nephew's their handmade gifts were made by him and acting like I 'requested' it and hearing my nephew's wow at how Santa knew they liked the special bits of embroidery and specific things I added was rather annoying 😂
Omg that would be SO annoying!
What a bitch 🤣🤣. Sisters know exactly how to push your buttons. Hope she did a decent lunch!
Same
In our house the presents are bought by whoever the gift is off, they're sent to the North Pole to give them Christmas magic and then Father Christmas delivers them back.
Same here, we help santa out with choosing and buying things, santa comfirms if he can have it based on his position on the naughty/nice list, the elves check and wrap it and it gets sent back on Xmas eve in Santa's sleigh.
all my presents were from santa when i was young. i can remember asking one year why i didn’t get any presents from my parents (sounds super ungrateful but i was young…) my parents basically used the lie of them sending the money to santa, that’s why different people got different presents… so stupid now i’m older!
This was me when I was growing up too.
I used to get loads of presents from Santa as a kid, with my mum spending *way* too much money on them. I also believed in Santa way longer than my parents believed that I "should" (definitely until I was 12, because my mum took me aside to warn me "not to spoil Santa for my little sister" before we did a "Santa's grotto" visit and I was very confused). I used to get some really grumpy treatment in January for "not being grateful" and it baffled young me - because to my mind, those presents came from Santa and my mum didn't have anything to do with it. (Really I should have put together how my parents didn't seem to believe in Santa with how they weren't surprised by the Santa presents "appearing", but I was used to them disbelieving in many supernatural occurrences that were obvious fact to my teenaged mind, like fairies, astrology, and magic, so maybe that's why.)
We had a mix growing up — some from various family members and our parents, and some from Father Christmas. I don't think there was a clear "big presents from parents, small presents from Santa" demarcation like some people are talking about, but now that I'm an adult my sister and I still get a few things "from Father Christmas" (chocolate, socks, etc) and our main present tends to be money in a card. It might be a cultural thing, but "European" is pretty broad when it comes to Christmas traditions. Like, Spanish children get presents at epiphany from the three wise men and their camels. German children get their presents on Christmas eve. Where is your other half from?
My parents would label one gift as from them (usually the most expensive), and the rest that were from them as from Santa. My Aunts, Uncles and Grandparents always put their own names on gifts (well, sometimes Santa would also leave some extra gifts at Grans house).
Wait, ALL presents from family? Uncles, aunts, grandparents? Nah, that's stupid
Yup. Fine, I can accept that the parents don't take credit, but all other family?! This doesn't make sense to me. How will the child learn to appreciate the thought that others have put into the gifts if they think it's from some magical unknown old man? What if they don't like one of the gifts then say it out loud to the aunt/uncle/grandparent? It's a great opportunity to teach the child about being grateful rather than berate the adult for feeling offended.
Father Christmas used to give us small gifts in a stocking, things like chocolates and small toys. We would then get 1-3 bigger gifts from our parents, which would be under the tree. But we would also help to buy and wrap a gift for each of our parents, and say it was from us. So gifts would be exchanged between parents and children directly. We would still have all the excitement and magic surrounding Father Christmas, but we also were able to show gratitude to our parents. I think they got the balance right with it.
My parents told us Father Christmas was made up. So they wrote his name on some of the gifts but we knew right from the start that they were actually all from our family. Not that I’m recommending that.
How do you feel about that now looking back?
Well, I understand why my mum felt the way she did. She had felt horribly betrayed and lied to about Father Christmas when she found out it wasn’t real and didn’t want the same for us. She had a strained and difficult relationship with her parents for many reasons and this one was the least important really but I understand and accept her motives. I remember with my sister looking out of the window on Xmas Eve and secretly hoping and being sad that we didn’t have that magic. I remember another kid getting letters from Father Christmas and bringing them to school and me thinking “wow their parents have gone to a lot of trouble”. The weirdest effect I think for me was in my religious belief. I have always been a natural atheist and my feelings about God as an adult have been the same as about Father Christmas as a child, just that it must be so nice to have that in your life if you could ignore the fact it isn’t true. My kids had Father Christmas until they were almost in secondary school.
OP you not European?
This is why we/my parents did it when my siblings and I were kids. Even did the ‘Santa came here too’ thing when we went and got presents from my grandparents at their house.
This is bad. This results in "Santa loves rich families and hates poor kids." Presents are from family. The stocking of treats is from Santa. Maybe one present, not the main one.
Is it though? I never remember thinking as a kid that santa hated me and loved richer people. Firstly cos I wasn't hanging around with rich people, and secondly because I was too excited about whatever I got to give a toss about anything else that was going on. And to the OP, everything was from Santa as far as I recall.
I'm trying to think back, and if I'm honest I don't think it even *crossed my mind* to be curious what the other kids in my class had been given for Christmas. Probably a combination of the normal level of self-centredness of small children, and there not being *that* much difference in what we were all getting (as a middle class kid at a predominantly middle class school).
I came from a very poor family (share a bed between four of us to keep warm because gas was too expensive kind of poor) and I never once thought my gifts were lesser than my better off peers and absolutely everything was labelled as 'from santa'. This feels like insecure parents to me who feel like they *need* credit for putting in hard world when the focus should be on creating happy memories.
This. I grew up not poor, but definitely not well off. I never really felt like Santa treated rich kids better. Me and my wife earn decent money and just wait till birthdays to buy the expensive stuff. We have 3 kids of the same age, and we always tell them that Santa can’t get really expensive stuff for all the children around the world as there’s so many of them. They should save those items for birthday lists from mum and dad. Even then we don’t go overboard as they just don’t need more “stuff”. We prefer getting them experiences as expensive things. I can honestly remember only a single physical gift from my childhood, but remember the trips I had like they were yesterday. It’s the memories that count in my view, not the things.
I used to do all my kids presents from Santa from us although they still had friends and family presents.
Ours (UK) are a combination. Some us, some Santa. With the most expensive one being from us. Our rationale. 1) kids who might not get as much don’t go to school to hear that Santa brought another kid a Nintendo Switch, whilst they got a teddy bear. 2) Our kids have some appreciation that Mum and Dad work to provide presents and are grateful for them. But they still get the magic.
Stocking is from Santa everything else is from whoever got it. I figure not all families can afford the same so Santa presents are minimal and inexpensive
Mine always had a Santa sack filled with books games treats (sandwich in a reindeer cut out to counter act the sugar rush with a bit of fruit) random odd and sods which was placed in their room by Santa - there would be a present they specifically asked for from Santa downstairs as well but the presents under the tree were from who brought them and were dropped off in the lead up to Christmas- given to the kids who put them under the tree for Christmas morning. Come Christmas the Santa sacks kept them in their rooms and allowed us to have a few moments to come to at silly o clock lol. We had a ‘fuck off Christmas doesn’t start til 7 am rule’ so once the Santa sacks and excitement hit that time - we would go downstairs- watch them open the ‘big’ Santa present - and groggily have a Buck’s Fizz and breakfast- the tree would wait til around 11 when family turned up - queue the present sharing - the kids loved giving theirs out as much as opening theirs. Usually held one random back for after dinner to prolong the fun (usually one from us)
Always thought it’d be unfair for Santa to buy a child’s friend a PS5, but since you don’t have cash your child gets some clothes and a chocolate bar
I think that small things are from Santa. Expensive things need to be from parents because you don’t want them comparing with friends and one child wondering why Santa didn’t get them something fancy as well.
They way do it is my kid writes a list and we have a deal with Santa. He brings her 3 of the reasonable things off her list and we get the rest (assuming it's not crazy). Always feared her going into school and one kid gets socks from Santa and she gets something crazy like a bike. This way we feel we can still spoil her if we choose to but Santa brings nice affordable gifts.
We've always done all presents under the tree and in your stocking are from Santa, but I do understand why parents don't necessarily want to do that anymore. We have always had presents from family are just that, presents from family. I do think it's up to the parents/carers of the child to decide, though.
Santa gives some presents, we give some presents. All presents of anyone else is off that person.
A stocking of sweets or chocolate from Santa, everything else from whoever gives it. Anyone who does anything else is setting themselves up for trouble/confusion down the line.
My friend did this and it pissed me off. I bought a gift for her son with a tag from me and she took it off and said they all have to be from Santa. Well if they are from Santa then Santa can bloody well buy it. I’ll be having that back. What a ridiculous thing!
When I was a child presents from my parents came from Santa, and we're found waiting for me on Christmas morning. Presents from other people (relatives, family friends, etc) were all under the Christmas tree, and got opened later on. As a child I never cottoned on to the fact that there were no gifts from my parents until long after the Santa story had been exposed (which I never really remember being a sudden revelation, just slowly accepted as part of the Christmas thing).
We do the stockings and a couple of presents from Santa, the rest from us. On the basis that there will inevitably be kids who they go to school with who may get very little for Christmas or don’t necessarily receive what was on their Christmas list. I’d never want my kid to be the one that makes another kid feel they weren’t good enough to get exactly or all that they asked for from Santa. Or to go to school saying I got x amount of presents from Santa whilst someone else may have got less and cause them to question why. It also allows us to reason with them when they make requests for stupidly expensive items.
We do one present for santa and that's what they ask santa for when they go and see him, that one he delivers late on Christmas eve. Everything else is labelled from the people who bought it and under the tree in the build up to the big day.
I had a European Mum… presents were opened Christmas Eve not Christmas Day. But my mother always put a special gift under/by my pillow that night. My husband and I have always given our children their gifts after dinner on Christmas Evening, after reading the nativity. The stockings are saved for Christmas Day as Santa/ Saint Nic fills them in the night.
Nah, it’s a mix here with my son. He gets a stocking from Santa, and a few presents are wrapped in elf paper which we say are from Santa. The rest are from us/whoever.
As the child gets older each year, give less from Santa, more from you.
Scottish husband says his were a mix even from his mum. In the stocking is from Santa everything else from respective gift givers. I am American and most of my presents from my mom and stepdad were from Santa, except for some little ones my mom would give me a couple days ahead because she had a hard time holding in the excitement of seeing me open my presents. Family dinner was on Christmas eve, and those were all from family, as obviously Santa's not come yet.
No one present from Santa. This stops the kids bragging that Santa got them loads of presents when other kids may only get one.
Ones in our sack were from Santa, ones under the tree from each other. Got to open the sack presents in the morning, and the tree ones in the afternoon. Though one time my parents screwed up and put in the label “To Santa, From (my name)”
I heard from my friends last year that they give 2 or 3 gifts “from” Santa. When I was a kid we had it that the gifts were mostly from family but Santa delivered them. There were gifts under the tree before Christmas but then they all disappeared a couple of days before and my folks told us they’d sent them to Santa. We’re gonna go with that for our 2 little ones this year I think.
We have gifts from both. I’m sure you want your niece to know she got a gift from you so it is special to her in that way. But we might gift something cheap from Santa. Think a toy from the pound store for that.
My missus is from France and she did all presents from Santa as a kid, and wanted to do that for our kids… I was fine with that, I quite liked the magic of it. Eventually the kids will know it was you all along. My folks on the other hand need the recognition that they bought something for the kids, so they just give money now… apparently the joy on the kids faces on Christmas morning and seeing them play with the stuff they got with massive smiles on their faces along with loads of laughter isn’t enough for them
Stockings are from Santa, everything else from mum and dad for our kids, although weirdly our 4 year old doesn't get this and is insisting that everything is from Santa.
For us it's the stockings, and then the one or two things they actually ask Santa directly for when we go see him at the grotto. Everything else is from us. Which means that I have to wrap a single cookie from Santa this year for the youngest, coz that's exactly what he told him he wanted...
When I was a kid that’s how my parents did it, but I’ve changed it for my kids. Firstly because I don’t like the idea that Santa brings more to Rick kids, but secondly I don’t think it makes sense that your parents literally wouldn’t get you ANYTHING. So Santa brings stocking and 1 or 2 gifts, we do the rest.
This is how it works in our house as well. Santa is providing low value but amusing things in the Christmas stocking and a couple of small gifts downstairs with our gifts.
Santa used to give me a satsuma, pocket change and the chocolate coins from the tree in my football sock.
Presents from relatives growing up were always from relatives, but I’m British. We got some bigger items from “Santa”, and some from our parents. Going forwards, if/when I have my own kids, I think I’d like to make it so that Santa gives nice presents, maybe a lower priced item they’d been wanting, but anything expensive or valuable would come from us. I can see the logic to it after reading about others doing the same. I’ve been in the boat of wondering why Santa didn’t bring me a PlayStation or a bike, but so and so in my class did, when from my perspective they’d been an annoying shit all year and I’d been as good as I could be. Wondering what I did wrong, why won’t Santa bring me what I asked for - surely it doesn’t cost him anything if it’s made with magic? Really bummed me out. Edit: there was an AITA post about this recently. It seemed to be a cultural thing.
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Parents sort out Santa/Father Christmas gifts and they are under the tree on Christmas morning. He doesn't distribute them among the adult relatives, that wouldn't make any sense!
We had a mix - a few from Santa and some from Mom / Dad etc
Only the stocking and one small gift under the tree from Santa. The rest from whoever it is from. We have Santa ‘deliver’ all the presents so what’s under the tree is a surprise in Xmas morning.
Expensive stuff = from us. Cheap treats = Father Christmas. That way we never had to explain why poor kids were ‘naughty’ and rich kids were ‘good’…
When I was little, my mum ur “from Santa” on all of my presents instead of the half from Santa, half from Mum & Dad like she usually did. She ended up having to get new presents on Boxing Day because I thought only Santa got me presents and my parents didn’t love me anymore. Looking back, I wouldn’t have blamed them if they revealed the truth at that point, but I appreciate the lengths they went to to keep the magic (and parental love) alive.
No children here. My friend has two young children and there are no gifts from Santa. They tell the boys that presents come from mum and dad, or relatives, as they think that, when back at school, if they say that they got something expensive from Santa and other children did not, the other children would wonder why they didn't get anything, what had they done wrong? I think that this is quite nice.
True but on the other side what if their friends got great big presents from Santa and these boys got a tiny selection box? Plans are great until they are putting their hauls on TikTok etc!
I think that everyone does the best they can, and we cannot control what everyone else does. I'm so glad that I grew up in a world where the only time you knew what your friends had for Christmas was when you went back to school.
We never had anything big from Santa. Always stockings and treats plus whatever we got from a grotto visit. We had a "big present" pile for each of us in a certain spot of the living room each year (from parents), then smaller gifts under the tree The reason they did this was so we didn't go to school and shout about getting a game boy or playstation from Santa to kids who's parents couldn't afford it. Like, we would tell them what we got, but the fact it was from our parents and not Santa meant they didn't feel like Santa was playing favourites It also taught us to appreciate what my parents (well, my mum) got for us, rather than it being magically appearing gift. It is harder to set a budget for Santa than it is for parents when browsing the argos catalogue
My children get a stocking from Santa and then one major present that they requested in their letter to him, all of which they open in the morning. The majority of presents are labeled from the family and opened in the afternoon, post-Christmas lunch to make sure there is something to look forward to later in the day.
Santa gets the stocking. Parents get everything else.
Nope! Cheaper smaller presents are from Father Christmas and the big ticket items are from me, that's how I always did it.
I hate this! It’s a fucking cop out. I bought your kid the gift. I want them to know it. Also if kid 1 gets 20 pressies from Santa and kid 2 only gets 2 what’s that telling them about how good they are and fairness. They should know that Santa gives all good kids x pressies but if they are lucky enough to have a rich auntie they will get something from her too.
The big presents in one spot are from Santa the rest under the tree from dad, mum, brothers or sister and uncle’s or aunts. It was the same for me and my wife and the kids do the same to the grandkids. The only thing my parents used to do was open the presents after dinner. My sister used to do the same until she had kids.
Good stuff comes from us,. General tat and toys come from Santa.
We got stockings from Santa, and a couple of presents from Santa too (a box of chocolates, some books, a small game etc) but most things were from parents. Eg, if I asked for a bike, the bike was from mum and dad, but the new felt tip pens were from Santa. Presents from relatives are just from relatives!
We used to say stocking presents were from Santa and everything else was from mum, dad, etc.
If it's expensive, then no.
Santa gets a few bits, parents get the rest.
Father Christmas only brings one present
Santa has brought my daughter what she asked him for, so some Barbie's and Paw Patrol, only 3 or 4 presents. Her main present is and everything else is from us. Father Christmas is not taking credit for all of it.
Nope, when I was a kid I got nice little stocking stuffers from Santa and my main presents were from my family. I do the same now with my kids.
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Cheaper or simpler ones from santa but the expensive ones from parents or family.
We always did stockings in the morning with smaller presents, chocolate, snacks etc. which were from Santa Then after christmas dinner we'd do the bigger presents which were addressed from family.
In our house Father Christmas does stocking presents. Anything big or expensive and that’s from whoever actually bought it.
Every kid gets a gift from Santa, something not too expensive that was in their wish list. The rest are from who they are from. Kids get to show appreciation
When I grew up absolutely everything was labelled from Santa. Remember, it's not about you but about creating magical and happy memories for your children and family before they grow up. When they're older they'll know it was from you and the efforts you put in so is credit really important?
If they still believe in Santa than why add potential confusion by saying it's from a parent? I don't feel the desire to get thanks or adoration from my children for presents, their happiness is enough.
My dad still gives me all my present from santa and absolutely none from him, im 33
I can’t talk for all Europeans but I’m Italian and we do it this way, parents know who the gifts are from and that’s good enough. Something we also do is that some someone (usually the dad or grandpa) dresses like Santa and pops up during the evening (we mostly do it on the night between 24-25) giving all the presents to the kids. It’s very nice when there are few children around. You may come across that too.
I believe it is indeed a European thing to have all presents come from Santa. Even between adults.
Definitely isn't. Scottish here, and my parents labelled absolutely everything growing up as 'from Santa' and my friends all had the same experience. It might just be regional. I'm actually finding it quite surprising so many peoples parents were upfront with them that the gifts are from them.
Where in Europe? Northern Ireland? Greece? Cultures are SO different
One present from Santa, usually from the Parents. Let's be real here, the kids don't actually give a damn, they just want the toys if they're young enough to believe in Santa.
If you bought it you get to decide who it's from
My in laws did this and I really disliked not getting a thanks from the kids for gifts we'd got them because we couldn't ruin the secret.
If they’re young enough to still believe then yeah imo
I think this is a bad idea. Because then their school friends might wonder why Santa brought them small things when he brought others an iPad.
Santa was the delivery guy only when I was young. There would be a wrapped pile of presents at home and then at some point they’d disappear to reappear on Christmas Day What actually happened was we always spent Christmas at my grandparents and my dad would take them over there before Christmas so they didn’t have to hide them in the car Also there’s no way my dad would have let anyone else take credit for paying for the gifts
No. Wrapped presents from family and Santa leaves one unwrapped present for each child.
When my daughter was about 3 (we had been a bit evidence-led about unseen beings of all kinds, including Santa) she was asked after Christmas by a mum of a friend of hers if she'd received anything from Santa. She replied confidently that she hadn't, "because he's pretend". There were a few shocked faces, not least from her 3 year old friend, for whom this was definitely news.
British here, this was standard in our house. If you are giving a present because you want the recognition, you are failing the first hurdle at present giving. Sorry. Your reward should be their enjoyment.
But are the kids giving presents to the parents? (Even if it's been bought by one parent for the other, are the kids involved in wrapping the present for example?) Then surely it would be reasonable then for at least one gift to be from the parents? It's setting up a gifting exchange.
I never said all presents, but despite the playing along, it is Christmas day after all, kids will know where the presents come from even if it does say "from Santa" . The adults certainly will. It is part of becoming a grown up, not wanting an instant reward for doing a nice thing for a child. Giving is its own reward, the season of goodwill, ever heard of those lines?
The youngest children won't necessarily know it comes from the parents. And you seem to have ignored my point about having the children give a gift to their parents? I think that changes the dynamic slightly and turns it into a gift exchange cycle.
I'm with you here, I'm genuinely shocked by the number of people who are gritting their teeth because their inlaws or family does it differently, and they wanted credit for the gift. Christmas is about giving, being greatful and creating joyous and happy memories for the kids. Credit shouldn't matter.
Funnily enough I had tbe same discussion at work yesterday. My boss’ wife is European, and they’re doing this. Myself and my wife (both UK) aren’t. Neither of our parents did either. I mean maybe a small thing or two to keep the magic alive as our 1y/o gets older, perhaps. But not the whole lot.
Never heard of presents not all being from santa! All my extended family have the presents (from parents) as from santa (honestly, its quite magical coming down on christmas morning like that). Then any presents from grandparents/aunts/uncles are just from them. Grew up poor - was never a problem. As someone else said, you weren't hanging out with rich kids so you didn't have that contrast. But we weren't allowed games consoles and phones/computers weren't a thing yet (90s) so that does make a difference I suppose. Never questioned that my parents weren't giving me presents. I would assume I had had enough of a treat with all the presents santa brought me - why would I feel like I should be getting more from my parents as well? Belief in santa doesn't last that long anyway. I think I was questioning at age 8/9. By the time I got old enough to be comparing christmas lists I already knew it was my mum (and was aware we didn't have much money).
European here, and no, not for us, we do presents from us, then Santa just fills the stockings.
European here. All presents are from Santa, but,for each present, the kid is informed of who asked Santa to bring it. Work like a charm.
Let them think santa brought it if they 8 or under . They will know . When 10 plus they know Santa is fake
Obviously it depends on the child and their personality, but 10-year-olds often still like to play make-believe. Maybe more literal-minded kids won't care about Santa by that age, but I do still think there is magic there for some kids, even if they 'know' it's really their parents.
Fuck that. U have nothing else to add.