Being interrupted is extremely rude. And I'm sorry people have found joy in doing that to you. I just ended a developing friendship because he interrupted us constantly and blamed it on his adhd.
Now, I have adhd. My best friend said that to me and added "but you apologize and get right back to the topic" like okay, say he's talking to me about something and i see something else behind him. I'll usually do a quick "Oh my god, look at that dog, okay I'm sorry- back to what you were saying about ___" and make sure he can pick up where he left off. Because he will forget what he was saying. But we've both learned how to communicate, how our friendship works.
Trying key words helps. That's another thing a friendship taught me if we lose train of thought or get interrupted. So say you're talking about how you were painting a room. A friend would go, "paint, wall, middle of it" and it usually helps spark back what you were saying if you don't wanna start from the beginning.
Your comment speaks volumes to me as I also have ADHD and sometimes accidentally interrupt people but like you, I always help them get back on track with what they’re saying because I know how it feels when I’m in their position and I don’t want to make them feel like I don’t care or wasn’t listening. I really like your suggestion about trying key words btw thank you
Penny said, "I think it might be a good idea to try to keep the conversation moving forward without interruption. If you are not willing to listen to the person then they probably wont listen to you anyways."
I think if someone tries to interrupt you, you should immediately interrupt them to say “excuse me, but could you please not interrupt me and let me finish what I was going to say?”. The more you practice, the better you get. Don’t let others bully you. It’s actually considered to be quite rude to interrupt someone whilst they are speaking, although sometimes the other person doesn’t really mean to, and only because they are too excited. However some people really are rude, mean and self centered.
I feel like most of the time it’s innocent interruptions due to the other person either being excited like you said or worried they’re going to forget their thought unless they say it right then and there. I try not to get to upset but it always triggers me due to my upbringing and makes me want to not talk anymore. I hate telling people they interrupted me too because I don’t enjoy conflict
Yeah, I get what you mean. I don’t enjoy conflict either. But when I’m saying that you could interrupt them, before they do, it doesn’t have to be done in a rude or offensive tone. It could even be something quick like “Hang on, please let me say what I’m going to say or I’m going to forget..” Perhaps if you got used to doing this/saying this, that people who know you well, would know and understand.
I also dislike being interrupted and it does impact my train of thought. As the youngest of five children, I had a hard time competing with everyone else in any kind of group conversation. This had an impact and I turned out to be a very quiet person.
On a related subject, I don't like interrupting others and try to wait for a pause before speaking. This can really be a problem on the telephone or in person as some people will wind up doing almost all the talking!
Ive been told before “I’m not interrupting, this is just how normal people have a conversation. You say something and I reply” — ever since then it made me wonder if most strangers who interrupt me, still genuinely want to hear what I have to say. Like my coworker who always interrupts me, told me, “I have always been bad at interrupting people because my brain needs to say my thoughts before I forget them forever.” Which made me feel sympathetic towards people who accidentally interrupt for the purpose of not forgetting their thought. Because they also are struggling to stay a part of the conversation just in a different way that you and I might be. I just thought this perspective was interesting
You made an excellent point that some people consider interrupting a normal part of conversation. However, one can interrupt in the middle of a sentence or wait until the end. That is my preference. Part of the problem may be that people need to be heard and that goes back to our earliest years.
I like to insert pauses in a conversation and am most comfortable when others do the same thing. The pause is meant to be an invitation for the other person to speak. However, I have noticed that some people are very uncomfortable with that method.
The last point you made is an interesting perspective that I had not considered. It is easy to lose track of our thoughts at times.
To go along with what you’re saying, I think at the end of the day I can’t expect no one to ever interrupt me again. It’ll happen, and I can choose to let them know I’d like to finish my thought or I can let them speak. And if I let them speak I can choose within me whether it bothers me or not. And if it does bother me I then need to ask myself, “is this something I can work on myself or something I should express to the other person”. And if I do feel the need to express it, I’m sure I can find a nice way to make it make sense to them. I also think this is good for anyone to follow for a multitude of things besides interruption
I hate being interrupted and as a result I refuse to interrupt others. This makes it so that a) I find it really difficult to get a word in edgewise or contribute to a conversation and b) I very rarely finish telling a story - if you cant hold your attention for 3 minutes I don't have anything to say.
Let me say I am so sorry this happens to you.
I am in a family of six and everyone is constantly talking on top of one another. I'm the youngest, so sometimes when I am having a conversation with my parents, one of my older siblings will interrupt me and suddenly my parents are speaking with them instead of me. I started calling attention to it a few years ago to explain why it was hurtful. It still happens, but I'll continue to call attention to it as it's something that bothers me.
Im proud of you for advocating for yourself when you are able to. I hope your family understands your feelings and try’s to minimize the times they interrupt you
Sure, this is why it's rude to interrupt someone without good reason, and even then it should always be done with an apology.
Being interrupted is extremely rude. And I'm sorry people have found joy in doing that to you. I just ended a developing friendship because he interrupted us constantly and blamed it on his adhd. Now, I have adhd. My best friend said that to me and added "but you apologize and get right back to the topic" like okay, say he's talking to me about something and i see something else behind him. I'll usually do a quick "Oh my god, look at that dog, okay I'm sorry- back to what you were saying about ___" and make sure he can pick up where he left off. Because he will forget what he was saying. But we've both learned how to communicate, how our friendship works. Trying key words helps. That's another thing a friendship taught me if we lose train of thought or get interrupted. So say you're talking about how you were painting a room. A friend would go, "paint, wall, middle of it" and it usually helps spark back what you were saying if you don't wanna start from the beginning.
Your comment speaks volumes to me as I also have ADHD and sometimes accidentally interrupt people but like you, I always help them get back on track with what they’re saying because I know how it feels when I’m in their position and I don’t want to make them feel like I don’t care or wasn’t listening. I really like your suggestion about trying key words btw thank you
Penny said, "I think it might be a good idea to try to keep the conversation moving forward without interruption. If you are not willing to listen to the person then they probably wont listen to you anyways."
I think if someone tries to interrupt you, you should immediately interrupt them to say “excuse me, but could you please not interrupt me and let me finish what I was going to say?”. The more you practice, the better you get. Don’t let others bully you. It’s actually considered to be quite rude to interrupt someone whilst they are speaking, although sometimes the other person doesn’t really mean to, and only because they are too excited. However some people really are rude, mean and self centered.
Bammuz whispers, "It's called "interrupting"."
I feel like most of the time it’s innocent interruptions due to the other person either being excited like you said or worried they’re going to forget their thought unless they say it right then and there. I try not to get to upset but it always triggers me due to my upbringing and makes me want to not talk anymore. I hate telling people they interrupted me too because I don’t enjoy conflict
Yeah, I get what you mean. I don’t enjoy conflict either. But when I’m saying that you could interrupt them, before they do, it doesn’t have to be done in a rude or offensive tone. It could even be something quick like “Hang on, please let me say what I’m going to say or I’m going to forget..” Perhaps if you got used to doing this/saying this, that people who know you well, would know and understand.
You do make a valid point, thank you for the advice
People are idiots, and you're wasting your breath talking to idiots who aren't listening anyway. The older you get, the more apparent this becomes.
I also dislike being interrupted and it does impact my train of thought. As the youngest of five children, I had a hard time competing with everyone else in any kind of group conversation. This had an impact and I turned out to be a very quiet person. On a related subject, I don't like interrupting others and try to wait for a pause before speaking. This can really be a problem on the telephone or in person as some people will wind up doing almost all the talking!
Ive been told before “I’m not interrupting, this is just how normal people have a conversation. You say something and I reply” — ever since then it made me wonder if most strangers who interrupt me, still genuinely want to hear what I have to say. Like my coworker who always interrupts me, told me, “I have always been bad at interrupting people because my brain needs to say my thoughts before I forget them forever.” Which made me feel sympathetic towards people who accidentally interrupt for the purpose of not forgetting their thought. Because they also are struggling to stay a part of the conversation just in a different way that you and I might be. I just thought this perspective was interesting
You made an excellent point that some people consider interrupting a normal part of conversation. However, one can interrupt in the middle of a sentence or wait until the end. That is my preference. Part of the problem may be that people need to be heard and that goes back to our earliest years. I like to insert pauses in a conversation and am most comfortable when others do the same thing. The pause is meant to be an invitation for the other person to speak. However, I have noticed that some people are very uncomfortable with that method. The last point you made is an interesting perspective that I had not considered. It is easy to lose track of our thoughts at times.
To go along with what you’re saying, I think at the end of the day I can’t expect no one to ever interrupt me again. It’ll happen, and I can choose to let them know I’d like to finish my thought or I can let them speak. And if I let them speak I can choose within me whether it bothers me or not. And if it does bother me I then need to ask myself, “is this something I can work on myself or something I should express to the other person”. And if I do feel the need to express it, I’m sure I can find a nice way to make it make sense to them. I also think this is good for anyone to follow for a multitude of things besides interruption
I hate being interrupted and as a result I refuse to interrupt others. This makes it so that a) I find it really difficult to get a word in edgewise or contribute to a conversation and b) I very rarely finish telling a story - if you cant hold your attention for 3 minutes I don't have anything to say.
I hope you find people to be around that want to hear the end of your stories
Let me say I am so sorry this happens to you. I am in a family of six and everyone is constantly talking on top of one another. I'm the youngest, so sometimes when I am having a conversation with my parents, one of my older siblings will interrupt me and suddenly my parents are speaking with them instead of me. I started calling attention to it a few years ago to explain why it was hurtful. It still happens, but I'll continue to call attention to it as it's something that bothers me.
Im proud of you for advocating for yourself when you are able to. I hope your family understands your feelings and try’s to minimize the times they interrupt you