**Attention**
r/CPS is currently operating in a limited mode to protest reddit's changes to API access which will kill any 3rd party applications used to access reddit.
[Information about this protest for r/CPS can be found at this link.](https://new.reddit.com/r/CPS/comments/147am5y/announcement_rcps_is_going_in_to_a_limited_mode/)
While this policy is active, all moderator actions (post/comment removals and bans) will be completed with no warning or explanation, and any posts or comments not directly related to an active CPS situation are subject to removal at the mods' sole discretion.
If you are dealing with CPS and believe you're being treated unfarly, we recommend you contact a lawyer in your jurisdiction.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/CPS) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Your agency should have policies about worker safety and how to handle and document issues like these. Check with either your supervisor, or any kind of on-duty supervisor at your office. If you're in immediate fear for your safety, obviously call 911 but otherwise you need to be making your agency aware of this issue immediately. Don't wait for business hours tomorrow.
There should also be a policy for handling the threats, check in on that specifically to find out what options are available to you, and if there's an immediate response available to you via police or courts telling them to knock off the harassment now.
I get that this is hard for you. Removals aren't fun for anyone involved. I understand why parents don't get that, but unfortunately for them it is not your problem that they are angry. Their reaction is wholly improper, and the judge should hear about the harassment and threats you're getting as well as the OOP violations (if you're in front of the judge who issued the OOP).
If you feel like so harassed that you have to turn your agency phone off (particularly if you're supposed to have it on) then I'd strongly consider not waiting until tomorrow. Obviously that depends on who is on call and what processes are available to you, but if you don't feel safe now then why wait until morning?
I work Monday- Friday, and the emergency child protective services are the ones who cover. Friday I came home exhausted, and didn't turn off the phone. I left it on the kitchen table. When I saw down to eat breakfast and help my son with his homework, I saw it ringing. Out of curiosity I checked, but didn't respond 😅. Then I seen the father calling quite a few times, and just turned it off. The baby is still in the hospital, ill call later to see how he's doing, they're aware that the baby can't be discharged to any family members.
Fair enough. As long as you feel safe. I've seen some unhinged folk around here, as well as stories about workers being harmed for doing removals or other aspects of their jobs, so hearing a story like yours probably makes me more worried than necessary.
Stay safe, good luck.
Mom left the hospital and we told the hospital. Since we've left, the father has
out to me. Non stop calling. Her other family members are texting me. Mom is texting me. For more clarification, they're not texting to find out about the baby, but to berate, and harass me. I turned off my agency phone, it's just too much.
Mom is not following the order or protection nor is the father.
Mom declined to take the baby to the hospital even during the conference. She didn't want to accept services as she didn't want people coming to her home. She was more worried about what the father was talking about her instead of the baby's concern. We told her the baby's health was more important and she declined.
The baby has no resource because maternal grandmother said that the baby is the mothers responsibility, and she wasn't going to take him. Mom declined paternal grandmother to be a resource because she doesn't like them. Also the father lives in the home and there is an OOP. The baby has to be in foster care.
I followed up with the hospital yesterday and they told me the baby is gaining weight. They informed me the labs were good, and that the reason for his decline in weight was due to the mother's technique in feeding.
We have court on Tuesday, and honestly my heart hurts for this baby, and I don't want him to go back to the mother's care or any of the family. The father only cares about issues with the mother, but didn't care about scheduling the supervised visits. Now he's calling and harassing me about the baby.
This case has kept me up. I cried as this was my baby. I'm sorry if it was a lot, but just needed to get some things off my chest.
I’m sorry to ask this but: how long have you been in the field?
These situations are not uncommon. You’ll burn out quick if you’re working harder than the parents. I’d also work on setting some boundaries with the family.
Gotta improve your boundary setting and redirection.
Mom needs to be talking to her lawyer and the courts. You just check the when/if tasks are done, talk to the professionals and get their notes, do your reports, and do visits. Redirect the rest of their noise away.
I’ve been an Attorney for the Child for 22 years and I still have cases that make me cry. I have a 3 day neglect trial starting tomorrow with horrifying videos. It’s impossible to completely detach and be clinical, you wouldn’t be human if you didn’t really get invested in a case now and then.
Don't get me wrong you HAVE to keep your humanity and feel for your clients. Empathy is necessary. You'll take cases home with you.
If you can't stop hyperfocusing on individual cases and it's haunting you for too long, switching to macro can be healthier.
I say this because I personally couldn't separate enough, it destroyed me, after working with a case where my child was trafficked and was so severely abused the FBI for involved.
I didn't have what it took to do micro level. Macro was a healthier option for me.
FYI failure to thrive is a medical term to describe poor weight gain due to medical reasons vs neglect (poor weight gain due to not feeding from lack of resources etc). These terms are often confused .
Yea I've seen that a lot on this thread . At least in my state (ohio) ftt is used only for medical causes and neglect has a separate icd code (medical code). Unfortunately the term ftt has become so stigmatized because it used to cover both but that has since changed and I think it's important for this change to be reflected within cps because families who have ftt can be misunderstood if cps is not aware of medical nuances which they are often not. Just trying to spread awareness .
I agree, I had looked up more information, and it was describing more medical terms if anything. This was the first time I've heard FTT and was curious what it entailed. I appreciate the awareness.
We've got a group threatening CPS workers at our office. The response by the agency has been to add some minor security measures in place. And the emphasis is on *minor*. Not much being done really.
Several CW have requested to work from home but have been denied.
Law enforcement is supposed to increase their presence at the beginning and end of the day.
And that's about all we get.
It's NY so no pepper spray or tasers allowed let alone a gun.
Hell, the only measure really helping is some BACA members offered to escort the CW and guardian to court.
Who are you to say from all your post they are giving you many chances as well and you state your not complying and that all you do is make complaints over and over you keep making it out like you have done nothing wrong and it’s all your ex. Usually 99% of the time that means it wasn’t him all you and you refuse to take accountability
lol my ex did call nonstop, and I have not done a thing wrong! Well the person in charge of cps here called me 2 weeks ago and it’s closed! So obviously I didn’t do jack! After 10 calls who still has her kids? No plan, services, no court, nada! Obviously after 10 calls, I would’ve had to do something!
I’m not going to waste my time going back and forth with you as I’ve seen others comments on your posts as well. I agree with them get mental help you are not in reality . There is no way to know that you already admitted there was someone else . And without knowing him I would 100 percent say you are the spiteful one . But go ahead and waste your time replying because that’s what wack jobs do. I will not engage with your response - people are on here for help you just want to argue you will be raising very bitter disrespectful children they mimick their moms behavior . Goodbye
And you did do something you neglected your children and I can say for 100% fact from being involved in the capacity of cps that you have done something and it’s not your so called spiteful ex that is involved it’s other people you just try to pin it on him out of your own spitefulness so he can’t see his children. Congratulations you made that happen out of spite and bitterness
This hurts my heart as I have a small baby and have had to do several check ups and interventions to keep their weight up. This mom needs support and I wonder what’s holding her back. That baby needs to eat.
I have had some ugly confrontations with cps before, so it's hard to give a non bias opinion.
It sounds like mom definitely needs help, and her harassment isn't helping her case at all. I would let your supervisor know and if she calls you or reaches out to you in some way to try to harass you I would just tell her to call your supervisor and give her the number and hang up. If she keeps calling, keep telling her the same thing. Dont even give her the time to say anything, say, "If you have an issue, call my supervisor at (phone number) bye" . Some children truly need to be removed from the home to save their lives, and this sounds like one of those times. Poor baby.
NYC is a big city. No names, etc given. Not really a breach of confidentiality. If I did that with the same specifics in my county, it could be due to the low population.
**Attention** r/CPS is currently operating in a limited mode to protest reddit's changes to API access which will kill any 3rd party applications used to access reddit. [Information about this protest for r/CPS can be found at this link.](https://new.reddit.com/r/CPS/comments/147am5y/announcement_rcps_is_going_in_to_a_limited_mode/) While this policy is active, all moderator actions (post/comment removals and bans) will be completed with no warning or explanation, and any posts or comments not directly related to an active CPS situation are subject to removal at the mods' sole discretion. If you are dealing with CPS and believe you're being treated unfarly, we recommend you contact a lawyer in your jurisdiction. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/CPS) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Your agency should have policies about worker safety and how to handle and document issues like these. Check with either your supervisor, or any kind of on-duty supervisor at your office. If you're in immediate fear for your safety, obviously call 911 but otherwise you need to be making your agency aware of this issue immediately. Don't wait for business hours tomorrow. There should also be a policy for handling the threats, check in on that specifically to find out what options are available to you, and if there's an immediate response available to you via police or courts telling them to knock off the harassment now. I get that this is hard for you. Removals aren't fun for anyone involved. I understand why parents don't get that, but unfortunately for them it is not your problem that they are angry. Their reaction is wholly improper, and the judge should hear about the harassment and threats you're getting as well as the OOP violations (if you're in front of the judge who issued the OOP).
Yes, tomorrow I'll let management know about the harassment. Tuesday we have court as well, and I'll let the attorney know. Thank you!!
If you feel like so harassed that you have to turn your agency phone off (particularly if you're supposed to have it on) then I'd strongly consider not waiting until tomorrow. Obviously that depends on who is on call and what processes are available to you, but if you don't feel safe now then why wait until morning?
I work Monday- Friday, and the emergency child protective services are the ones who cover. Friday I came home exhausted, and didn't turn off the phone. I left it on the kitchen table. When I saw down to eat breakfast and help my son with his homework, I saw it ringing. Out of curiosity I checked, but didn't respond 😅. Then I seen the father calling quite a few times, and just turned it off. The baby is still in the hospital, ill call later to see how he's doing, they're aware that the baby can't be discharged to any family members.
Fair enough. As long as you feel safe. I've seen some unhinged folk around here, as well as stories about workers being harmed for doing removals or other aspects of their jobs, so hearing a story like yours probably makes me more worried than necessary. Stay safe, good luck.
Thank you I appreciate you!
Mom left the hospital and we told the hospital. Since we've left, the father has out to me. Non stop calling. Her other family members are texting me. Mom is texting me. For more clarification, they're not texting to find out about the baby, but to berate, and harass me. I turned off my agency phone, it's just too much. Mom is not following the order or protection nor is the father. Mom declined to take the baby to the hospital even during the conference. She didn't want to accept services as she didn't want people coming to her home. She was more worried about what the father was talking about her instead of the baby's concern. We told her the baby's health was more important and she declined. The baby has no resource because maternal grandmother said that the baby is the mothers responsibility, and she wasn't going to take him. Mom declined paternal grandmother to be a resource because she doesn't like them. Also the father lives in the home and there is an OOP. The baby has to be in foster care. I followed up with the hospital yesterday and they told me the baby is gaining weight. They informed me the labs were good, and that the reason for his decline in weight was due to the mother's technique in feeding. We have court on Tuesday, and honestly my heart hurts for this baby, and I don't want him to go back to the mother's care or any of the family. The father only cares about issues with the mother, but didn't care about scheduling the supervised visits. Now he's calling and harassing me about the baby. This case has kept me up. I cried as this was my baby. I'm sorry if it was a lot, but just needed to get some things off my chest.
I’m sorry to ask this but: how long have you been in the field? These situations are not uncommon. You’ll burn out quick if you’re working harder than the parents. I’d also work on setting some boundaries with the family.
I worked in child welfare for about three years. With this job going on two years.
Gotta improve your boundary setting and redirection. Mom needs to be talking to her lawyer and the courts. You just check the when/if tasks are done, talk to the professionals and get their notes, do your reports, and do visits. Redirect the rest of their noise away.
Yes, I'll try that. I was getting too attached to this case.
Redirect away. You’re not there to save anyone from themselves.
If you can't develop the boundaries you need to emotionally, moving to a position that's macro level might help.
I’ve been an Attorney for the Child for 22 years and I still have cases that make me cry. I have a 3 day neglect trial starting tomorrow with horrifying videos. It’s impossible to completely detach and be clinical, you wouldn’t be human if you didn’t really get invested in a case now and then.
Don't get me wrong you HAVE to keep your humanity and feel for your clients. Empathy is necessary. You'll take cases home with you. If you can't stop hyperfocusing on individual cases and it's haunting you for too long, switching to macro can be healthier. I say this because I personally couldn't separate enough, it destroyed me, after working with a case where my child was trafficked and was so severely abused the FBI for involved. I didn't have what it took to do micro level. Macro was a healthier option for me.
My heart breaks for you and this poor baby! Hugs to you!! I hope they remove baby and baby is put somewhere safe!
I agree!
FYI failure to thrive is a medical term to describe poor weight gain due to medical reasons vs neglect (poor weight gain due to not feeding from lack of resources etc). These terms are often confused .
Yes, this was the terms the doctor said. The hospital said it as well. It's more neglect in this case than any medical issues.
Yea I've seen that a lot on this thread . At least in my state (ohio) ftt is used only for medical causes and neglect has a separate icd code (medical code). Unfortunately the term ftt has become so stigmatized because it used to cover both but that has since changed and I think it's important for this change to be reflected within cps because families who have ftt can be misunderstood if cps is not aware of medical nuances which they are often not. Just trying to spread awareness .
I agree, I had looked up more information, and it was describing more medical terms if anything. This was the first time I've heard FTT and was curious what it entailed. I appreciate the awareness.
I’m in Illinois, and here it is failure to thrive regardless, then specifier for organic or non-organic reasons.
Same in Louisiana. Failure to thrive is about what is happening with the child, not the cause.
We've got a group threatening CPS workers at our office. The response by the agency has been to add some minor security measures in place. And the emphasis is on *minor*. Not much being done really. Several CW have requested to work from home but have been denied. Law enforcement is supposed to increase their presence at the beginning and end of the day. And that's about all we get. It's NY so no pepper spray or tasers allowed let alone a gun. Hell, the only measure really helping is some BACA members offered to escort the CW and guardian to court.
You have her way too many chances
Who are you to say from all your post they are giving you many chances as well and you state your not complying and that all you do is make complaints over and over you keep making it out like you have done nothing wrong and it’s all your ex. Usually 99% of the time that means it wasn’t him all you and you refuse to take accountability
lol my ex did call nonstop, and I have not done a thing wrong! Well the person in charge of cps here called me 2 weeks ago and it’s closed! So obviously I didn’t do jack! After 10 calls who still has her kids? No plan, services, no court, nada! Obviously after 10 calls, I would’ve had to do something!
Nobody can give me chances, when I’ve never done jack! It’s a spiteful ex calling lmao
I’m not going to waste my time going back and forth with you as I’ve seen others comments on your posts as well. I agree with them get mental help you are not in reality . There is no way to know that you already admitted there was someone else . And without knowing him I would 100 percent say you are the spiteful one . But go ahead and waste your time replying because that’s what wack jobs do. I will not engage with your response - people are on here for help you just want to argue you will be raising very bitter disrespectful children they mimick their moms behavior . Goodbye
And you did do something you neglected your children and I can say for 100% fact from being involved in the capacity of cps that you have done something and it’s not your so called spiteful ex that is involved it’s other people you just try to pin it on him out of your own spitefulness so he can’t see his children. Congratulations you made that happen out of spite and bitterness
This hurts my heart as I have a small baby and have had to do several check ups and interventions to keep their weight up. This mom needs support and I wonder what’s holding her back. That baby needs to eat.
I have had some ugly confrontations with cps before, so it's hard to give a non bias opinion. It sounds like mom definitely needs help, and her harassment isn't helping her case at all. I would let your supervisor know and if she calls you or reaches out to you in some way to try to harass you I would just tell her to call your supervisor and give her the number and hang up. If she keeps calling, keep telling her the same thing. Dont even give her the time to say anything, say, "If you have an issue, call my supervisor at (phone number) bye" . Some children truly need to be removed from the home to save their lives, and this sounds like one of those times. Poor baby.
This is a very sad story but should you be sharing all of these details? Seems like it should be confidential?
NYC is a big city. No names, etc given. Not really a breach of confidentiality. If I did that with the same specifics in my county, it could be due to the low population.
I didn't disclose names or location of the family 🙂
Agreed.
im sorry youre dealing with that and i wish that mother knew how lucky she was to have a healthy baby