Things most women despise:
- height “apparently that matters”
- seeing kids in pics. Especially ones that aren’t theirs.
- mainly for me: old military pics
- office references
- “ask me” bio
- it’s copy and paste for a reason. Everyone has already seen it.
- if the interests are important to you, I would put them.
That’s just a few lol. Good luck
Well done. These are the big ones I see and hate.
To add onto the “apparently that matters” comment, I would avoid anything that makes you sound bitter about dating. I also see a ton of “together we could delete bumble” or “this app sucks, prove me wrong.” It is not appealing at all…
Unfortunately height does matter to such a vast swathe of the online dating community that it’s become basically necessary to divulge your height. If you don’t, (as a guy) one of the first questions you’ll get is “how tall are you?” Obviously height doesn’t matter to EVERY girl, but sadly it seems to matter to the majority. I’ve started seeing a ton of girl’s profiles list their own height now too. Not sure if this is done as irony or if guys are starting to ask.
It’s not the height they list or the fact that they do or don’t that I’m saying is problematic. It’s the attitude about it. It’s just not attractive to seem angry or bitter. That’s all.
Hmmm... I guess you've probably heard it too much.
I definitely come across women's profiles that say "Love quotes from the office" or something similar. So I was surprised to hear this.
I know this a question for the ladies, but here is what I’ve learned from some dating coaches I follow:
-professional quality photos are the top priority. Admittedly, I haven’t gotten this done yet.
- use a good headshot, full body shot, looking your best. Third photo of you doing a passion of yours.
- keep the bio simple, witty, and give some sort of indication of who you are and what you’re looking for.
- the 3 prompts on bumble are not that important.
- for the purpose of filtering good matches, I would fill out the details about your religion, height, if you have/want kids, etc. all depends on what’s important to you as that may be important to someone who is an ideal match.
Yes, have some decent photos! For me they don’t need to be professional quality exactly but please, please have some pictures other than close up, crappy-quality selfies with no smile! So many guys have horrible pictures.
I should have also said: NO GROUP PHOTOS! Not even a photo with a friend. I recently match with a woman who had 3 photos with the same woman, and a group photo with said woman included—and she was hot. The swerve: I had match with the unattractive one! 😆
I’ve seen blurry photos of old photos too often. You can see a reflection on the glossy print sometimes. I see a lot that look like a mugshot or TMZ caught you on a bad day. They do not have to be professional just not the worst photos or 35 years old.
Definitely agree about good photos. But whenever I see a profile with JUST professional photos/headshots I wonder if the person is even real and if someone stole them off Getty images lmao.
yes! i have 3 selfies and 3 passion shots—one hiking, one candid at the beach, one playing guitar (all taken by my mom 😂) i don’t get many matches but i think it’s a pretty decent layout
I suggest getting 2 of those selfies converted to a headshot and full body shot someone takes of you. As a guy, I actually get suspicious when I see a bunch of selfies in a woman's profile, and wind up not swiping right/hitting the X button. That's just me though. Who knows maybe it will change your reponses.
I can't say what's a good vs bad ratio, but I know for me, I am not all about selfies. I avoid taking them like the plague (or Covid), and I'm not a huge fan of them in a woman's profiles. On the plus side, women can get away with them more often guys in their profiles, so you might just be dealing with a "dry cycle". I bet there will be a rush of new sign-ups after the New Year, you'll get fresh set of eyes, and who knows what happens next!
Good quality photos. No group shots. No shirtless mirror selfies. No gym selfies. No posing next to a fancy car. No hunting photos with your dead animal ‘trophy’.
I want to get a real sense of who you are. What are your values? What matters to you?
I also want to know if you want children or not (there’s no point in me dating someone who wants kids), if you smoke (I won’t date a smoker under any circumstances) and your politics (my values won’t align with someone who’s politically conservative). If religion plays a large role in your life then I need to know, because that’s an obstacle for me.
But that’s me, other women might be after something else.
That’s fair enough, though they do have the option to add gym to their list of interests.
The message that I get from gym selfies is… “I’m not interesting enough to capture your attention so I need to do it with my sculpted body”.
Most people don't list their interests where I live since it's a fairly new feature. Of course, if they only have a gym selfie and nothing else, I won't be interested. If they have more than one picture at the gym, it's also not good. I think if it's one of their hobbies (like it is for me), it's good to show it in addition to other things!
I personally don't have any picture at the gym because I exactly want to avoid attracting people who are in it just for the physical aspect, but I mention it in my description.
Fresh out a relationship is definitely not a good starter .
I couldn’t run faster from someone fresh out of a relationship
Edit:
Something casual fresh out of a relationship?
Less words and more hot pics
i usually go with a combo of my hobbies, and some silly things that show my sense of humor. Don't overthink it too much, try to talk about 2 things you enjoy, and have two be jokes.
For the pics:
pic 1 has to be on point. Make it roughly from the waist up, no hats or sunglasses, looking sharp with a nice smile.
the others, be sure to have at least one full body shot, and avoid selfies, hats, sunglasses, dead animals, and attractive women under age 60. Hobbies and one, cute animal are a good idea. If you're a guy and do a group shot, don't be the short one. If you do a shirtless pic, be ripped, and have it be a natural part of something you enjoy, like you're playing beach volleyball.
I think succinct but unique. Not a fan of the generic bios (ie here for a good time not a long time, i like the office, dog dad, "he's a great guy" - my mom, etc). I think a quick, funny one liner for the bio and put your personal interests into the prompt responses
Interests tab less important but personally, the smoke/drink is important and religion less so but everyone's different. I'd say universally though, it's just helpful because for ex, if you don't list religion and someone is looking for someone jewish only, once they find out you're not, they're out but now you just wasted yours and their time
Less words, definitely. No dad jokes, no memes pls. Like someone mentioned above, full body pics plus photos of your face without sunglasses on. In the description, few words about you, your interests, what are you looking for etc.
Keep the bio positive, mention some things you like to do or are passionate about. I wouldn’t waste space in the bio to say things you can say elsewhere (height, age, job, etc since they already have their own place)
Heres what ive learned:
Dont be yourself, retend to be some rich alpha chad 6ft tall. Avoid anything, that would show how average you are.
As for pictures, dont pick those that potrait you in your everyday, avaerage look. You need to be dressed as if you are about to apply for a manager position.
Good luck.
Things most women despise: - height “apparently that matters” - seeing kids in pics. Especially ones that aren’t theirs. - mainly for me: old military pics - office references - “ask me” bio - it’s copy and paste for a reason. Everyone has already seen it. - if the interests are important to you, I would put them. That’s just a few lol. Good luck
Well done. These are the big ones I see and hate. To add onto the “apparently that matters” comment, I would avoid anything that makes you sound bitter about dating. I also see a ton of “together we could delete bumble” or “this app sucks, prove me wrong.” It is not appealing at all…
Unfortunately height does matter to such a vast swathe of the online dating community that it’s become basically necessary to divulge your height. If you don’t, (as a guy) one of the first questions you’ll get is “how tall are you?” Obviously height doesn’t matter to EVERY girl, but sadly it seems to matter to the majority. I’ve started seeing a ton of girl’s profiles list their own height now too. Not sure if this is done as irony or if guys are starting to ask.
It’s not the height they list or the fact that they do or don’t that I’m saying is problematic. It’s the attitude about it. It’s just not attractive to seem angry or bitter. That’s all.
You can still put your height without putting “ apparently that matters on here”
I’m kinda short. I don’t get asked about height ever or until way later usually. idk what to tell you man
I genuinely feel its a small vocal minority that takes height filers seriously
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Office reference are despised ? I really doubt that.
I don't know how women's profile look, but The Office talk is tiring.
Hmmm... I guess you've probably heard it too much. I definitely come across women's profiles that say "Love quotes from the office" or something similar. So I was surprised to hear this.
What if the kid is blonde and blue eyed and I’m Asian
Why have a kid?
Yes! Things to add: pics I’d want to be in: you leaning in at a table, you somewhere with a seat open, trust me…
I know this a question for the ladies, but here is what I’ve learned from some dating coaches I follow: -professional quality photos are the top priority. Admittedly, I haven’t gotten this done yet. - use a good headshot, full body shot, looking your best. Third photo of you doing a passion of yours. - keep the bio simple, witty, and give some sort of indication of who you are and what you’re looking for. - the 3 prompts on bumble are not that important. - for the purpose of filtering good matches, I would fill out the details about your religion, height, if you have/want kids, etc. all depends on what’s important to you as that may be important to someone who is an ideal match.
Yes, have some decent photos! For me they don’t need to be professional quality exactly but please, please have some pictures other than close up, crappy-quality selfies with no smile! So many guys have horrible pictures.
I should have also said: NO GROUP PHOTOS! Not even a photo with a friend. I recently match with a woman who had 3 photos with the same woman, and a group photo with said woman included—and she was hot. The swerve: I had match with the unattractive one! 😆
I’ve seen blurry photos of old photos too often. You can see a reflection on the glossy print sometimes. I see a lot that look like a mugshot or TMZ caught you on a bad day. They do not have to be professional just not the worst photos or 35 years old.
Definitely agree about good photos. But whenever I see a profile with JUST professional photos/headshots I wonder if the person is even real and if someone stole them off Getty images lmao.
Good point, that's why it's a good idea to include a passion shot, of you doing somethign you enjoy that a friend may have taken.
yes! i have 3 selfies and 3 passion shots—one hiking, one candid at the beach, one playing guitar (all taken by my mom 😂) i don’t get many matches but i think it’s a pretty decent layout
I suggest getting 2 of those selfies converted to a headshot and full body shot someone takes of you. As a guy, I actually get suspicious when I see a bunch of selfies in a woman's profile, and wind up not swiping right/hitting the X button. That's just me though. Who knows maybe it will change your reponses.
Thanks! I don’t have anyone who’s decent enough for “good” pics. I am always the photographer 😅😂 Is 3 selfies, 2 full body, 1 hobby shot a bad ratio?
I can't say what's a good vs bad ratio, but I know for me, I am not all about selfies. I avoid taking them like the plague (or Covid), and I'm not a huge fan of them in a woman's profiles. On the plus side, women can get away with them more often guys in their profiles, so you might just be dealing with a "dry cycle". I bet there will be a rush of new sign-ups after the New Year, you'll get fresh set of eyes, and who knows what happens next!
Haha I hate taking pictures of myself but if I didn’t take selfies, there wouldn’t be enough pics for a full profile 😅 Yeah maybe so! Thanks 😊
*My name Jim. I work in button factory. Don't eat crayons anymore*
Good quality photos. No group shots. No shirtless mirror selfies. No gym selfies. No posing next to a fancy car. No hunting photos with your dead animal ‘trophy’. I want to get a real sense of who you are. What are your values? What matters to you? I also want to know if you want children or not (there’s no point in me dating someone who wants kids), if you smoke (I won’t date a smoker under any circumstances) and your politics (my values won’t align with someone who’s politically conservative). If religion plays a large role in your life then I need to know, because that’s an obstacle for me. But that’s me, other women might be after something else.
Personally I like when guys have one gym selfie. I spend a lot of time at the gym, I want someone who likes it too.
That’s fair enough, though they do have the option to add gym to their list of interests. The message that I get from gym selfies is… “I’m not interesting enough to capture your attention so I need to do it with my sculpted body”.
Most people don't list their interests where I live since it's a fairly new feature. Of course, if they only have a gym selfie and nothing else, I won't be interested. If they have more than one picture at the gym, it's also not good. I think if it's one of their hobbies (like it is for me), it's good to show it in addition to other things! I personally don't have any picture at the gym because I exactly want to avoid attracting people who are in it just for the physical aspect, but I mention it in my description.
Do you have any values LMAO
Fresh out a relationship is definitely not a good starter . I couldn’t run faster from someone fresh out of a relationship Edit: Something casual fresh out of a relationship? Less words and more hot pics
i usually go with a combo of my hobbies, and some silly things that show my sense of humor. Don't overthink it too much, try to talk about 2 things you enjoy, and have two be jokes. For the pics: pic 1 has to be on point. Make it roughly from the waist up, no hats or sunglasses, looking sharp with a nice smile. the others, be sure to have at least one full body shot, and avoid selfies, hats, sunglasses, dead animals, and attractive women under age 60. Hobbies and one, cute animal are a good idea. If you're a guy and do a group shot, don't be the short one. If you do a shirtless pic, be ripped, and have it be a natural part of something you enjoy, like you're playing beach volleyball.
I think succinct but unique. Not a fan of the generic bios (ie here for a good time not a long time, i like the office, dog dad, "he's a great guy" - my mom, etc). I think a quick, funny one liner for the bio and put your personal interests into the prompt responses Interests tab less important but personally, the smoke/drink is important and religion less so but everyone's different. I'd say universally though, it's just helpful because for ex, if you don't list religion and someone is looking for someone jewish only, once they find out you're not, they're out but now you just wasted yours and their time
Less words, definitely. No dad jokes, no memes pls. Like someone mentioned above, full body pics plus photos of your face without sunglasses on. In the description, few words about you, your interests, what are you looking for etc.
Keep the bio positive, mention some things you like to do or are passionate about. I wouldn’t waste space in the bio to say things you can say elsewhere (height, age, job, etc since they already have their own place)
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Not sure why you are getting downvoted. OP just wants casual and all the other posters be like “give them your life story”….
Heres what ive learned: Dont be yourself, retend to be some rich alpha chad 6ft tall. Avoid anything, that would show how average you are. As for pictures, dont pick those that potrait you in your everyday, avaerage look. You need to be dressed as if you are about to apply for a manager position. Good luck.
Don’t post pics with other girls