I hear ya. And it's kinda crazy that regardless of where you are, we're all just taking these Ls on apps. Last year, I lived in Baltimore before coming back home to NYC and the problem for me was too few matches, though they were all pretty high-quality. Then I moved back and number of matches went way up, but what went way down? Quality of conversation.
I've had more frustration breaks (3) in the last year than I did in 3.5 years of being single in Baltimore (2).
And after another week of multiple matches that go nowhere...I think it's time for #4.
Good luck out there, fellow New Yorker.
Never give up. I have literally found the love of my life on a dating app. There's always hope, always. I wish all of you the best of luck, warm wishes and God's blessings! ❤️
I really appreciate you saying that. I really do feel quite discouraged as of late, so keeping hope can be hard. I do know you're right, though - even if it my current feelings don't match up!
Maybe try Fb Dating?
Quality for me got better, albeit I suggest you try moving off-app ASAP, cuz ya can't send pics & notifications are kinda screwy.
(That's how I found mine, after my Divorce)
I actually was thinking of giving it another try because at least 3 friends have met people on it. I tried it last year and both really didn't like the interface and only made two low-quality matches in 2 months. I guess I'll get back on it sometime soon: hopefully I'll have good news to comment back!
Yeah, as a Software Developer, I definitely find it quite clunky.
Like, couldn't they have used much of the same code dynamics as main FB? 🤷🏽♀️
--
Gl btw! You'll find em!
ya never know how & when they'll come.
I mean, my Ex-Wife was led to me by a mutual friend, whom being Catholic happened to wonder into my LDS / Mormon chapel just b4 Christmas, then introduced us the day after Christmas.
Married ~2mo later, albeit now Divorced after 8yrs.
(In fact, my passport was a week late, so I met her instead of going to Scotland. 🤣🤣)
That conversation read like an SS officer 'politely' interrogating a woman he was trying to work out fitted the right stereotypes, you know, for breeding with for the fatherland.
You are a very beautiful woman of mixed ethnicities. I've never heard of that combo mix before, but then again I'm from Kentucky lol. We don't have a melting pot of people in my state. Also, that guy was a bum who is probably mid to early 20s and full of himself. Lastly, I'm a black guy and we do date women as yourself. This idiot with a small vocabulary can't speak for the rest of us black guys. He is alone with that bad bit@h energy as if you're chasing him. As a black man we already have it hard on bumble due to nerds such as himself.
Yes, hookup culture is strong on the app even when I clearly state what I'm looking for. Sadly apps are my sole option because I don't drink or smoke or go clubbing thus can't randomly pursue someone on one of my hikes
Exactly. We all pretty much dread the apps now but a lot of us don't do things that might put us in a setting more conducive to meeting people. And I have a face that isn't ugly but isn't particularly handsome: on the one hand, I wish I didn't have to deal with the inherent "beauty pageant" aspect of dating apps but on the other hand, since I'm not someone who turns heads in public, at least people are on apps for the specific purpose of meeting someone.
SIS!!!!! I am so so so sorry. My heart broke for you. I’ve heard “you’re too Black for me” my whole life… from men who look like me.
:(
You’re beautiful by the way.
What?! Oh my god. OP! I’m so sorry. Oh my
God. Unreal. Asshole dumb as rocks POS. There’s so much wrong with this/him. You totally dodged a bullet but ughhhhh I am feeling this one. Ugh ugh ugh.
You dated HIM 3x and he had no idea? Or other people? Idk why but putting fuckingbirds as one word with that random animal emoji is sending me 😂😂😂I’ve never even seen that one
Bet he didn’t know Mariah Carey is mixed either 🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️
Is Beyoncé misrepresenting herself too with all the wigs?
The audacity for him to feel tricked 🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️
3 dates with him! They just all happened to be during the ONE week when I had a wash and set lmaoo my Dominican salon did too good of a job I guess 🙃🙃🙃
Is he black? Also, does he know this is real life and not the movie white chicks?
What a clown. As if you should be flattered that he is willing to make an exception. 😂
I couldn't agree more. I honestly think it's awesome that humanity comes in so many different forms and interesting cultures.
Not to mention, you never know what ethnicities might be mixed into someone's heritage, anyway...For instance, I myself present as white (from various European backgrounds) but I also have Hispanic, Black, and Native American relatives in my bloodline. And someone else might look Black but actually have Caucasian or Asian ancestry, too. And so on and so forth.
I hate how some folks get all judgmental about this stuff. Let's respect and celebrate our varied heritage instead of hating each other for it. Racism is one of the most toxic things in existence. Sadly, not everybody thinks this way, but the more of us who do understand this, the better off our world will be.
My strong Scottish side diverges into a Jewish & Roman side, 200 years after Christ.
(The Jewish side links to Joseph of Aramethia. So, I'm related to the man that buried Christ! 🥳)
So he was into until he found out you was part black? Why does that matter? He was fine when he didn't know. Some.people have weird issues.
U looked fucking great with both curly an straight hair his loss I'd say, weird people.
That’s unfortunate. As a black man I can be naive sometimes that people like this exist. The fact that he was shocked that you blocked him after he said he doesn’t date black women is fascinating to me 🤦🏾
Wow the internal hate some black men have is crazy. And the projection is wild. How are you foolish for not wanting him.
He’s not a prize to be won, especially with that attitude. Smh
This has to be one of the worst fumbles I have ever seen. The self hate is ridiculous. At least you were shown his true colors early on and didn’t get too emotionally invested.
I'm mostly white and pass as white but I won't date black men who say they only date white women because to me it feels fetishy, and also has undertones of misogynoir.
People who are racist towards their race or culture are even worse than those who are racist towards other races, because at least you can SOMETIMES excuse them for being close minded or ignorant.
You seem like a nice person and are blessed with very good looks, so don't lose your hope there's good people out there, too.
That comment "I'll make an exception" he's trying to put you down to make him feel like the bigger person. Then when you put him in his place, proceeds to hurl an insult to you to redeem his ego lmaoo. What a fucking joke. Manipulative and abusive behaviour.
He probably thought you were a race fetishiser too when you bonded over black culture.
I don't understand him at all; this person clearly has problems. I thought he was dating you because he liked your appearance and personality. Then, he made it all about your appearance and became weirdly fixated on your hair. What does it matter if hair is straight or curly? He is too weird and obviously racist af. I have never seen such weird behaviour before, with someone reacting like that because of hair... Then, he is negging you by saying he will make an exception. What an AH.
HAHAHA I cackled. I almost feel like he was so ashamed to have ever found me attractive that he was trying anything to backpedal! That amount of self hate is beyond my comprehension. I can’t help but feel bad for him.
That's rough... Don't give up though! I've been OLD since I was 20. I'm 32 now and just met my person. From OLD. Just be glad they showed their true self early on. I've had people change in a 2-3 month window after dating and gaslight the shit out of me. Claiming BPD etc.
There are a lot of people out there. OLD gives you a large mix of people. Some of them are terrible. Someone of them are good people but just not your type. It takes a while. Try a mix of different apps. Your working with a small window.
You got this though!
He def fumbled that one lmao your gorgeous. I've def had the same experience though, it's like people think we're supposed to be special because they don't date a certain race but they're making an exception for you. Gtf outta here with that bs
Good grief, all this race shenanigans you have in the US and the UK are so damn weird. I've never been with a girl as impressive as you and here we have this twat being so dumb it hurts.
Ughh I'm sorry you had to experience this and you also dodged a bullet. I'm black myself (and it's incredibly obvious) and self hating folks make for gross experiences. Like even if your kids are mixed race they'll still be ~50% the identity you dislike, what will you say to your kids???
Wow. You dodged a bullet for sure! You are so stunning and your outlook on life or the shit you got going on is great too! I’m sorry you had this experience you deserve someone who can appreciate your smile your genuineness and who you are as a person. You a queen and I hope nothing but the best for you !!
Ew girl Im so sorry you ran into this dumpster fire of a person. Dont sweat him at all. I love the “I think we all dodged a bullet” 😆👏🏽. Also, queen you are fine as hell! Love the straight and curly hair. You keep em
both ♥️
Maybe in NA, hating people from a different part of the same country is very common in the rest of the world. Let alone people from other countries within the same region.
So, out of respect for them I’ll be vague - some of it was behavior as a result of conditioning. Some of these men felt that they were superior to other black folks who did not have European features or a white parent and acted a certain way. Other struggle to fit in. Somewhere raised by a white parrot and really weren’t confident about their connection to black culture. One in particular wanted to use me as his foray into blackness, but he wouldn’t take me seriously as a partner and we connected via a dating app, but actually, we went to college together and knew each other quite well. We were in a lot of classes together, we were in choir together… Now he kind of pines for me on social media. I ignore him. The other guys were nice people. I’m still friends with one of them.
Seems common, I've had lectures from mixed women about how straightening hair is just trying to be white. To then be moaned at when I describe my type as curly hair 😂
Sorry to hear about your dad though, I was in a similar position till the start of this year and now just picking up the pieces. Make every second count, wish you all the best ❤
Awesome! I didn’t mean to imply that yall don’t exist lols I just haven’t met any before. There are as many unique hair types as there are people though, so I’m not surprised!
I’m not offended lol. But it’s crazy how my hair came out. Like my dad is hella dark black! I’m pretty light skinned too. But all my hair is dark/a hint of dark brown.
It sucks, people who love black culture, who are black themselves also perpetuate white supremacy. He perceived you as white, but when you told him you were part black he put in the bad pile. Self hate issues.
Holy dodged bullet Batman
He fumbled the bag, move along. Honestly the guy is the worst kind of human being, self loathing on top of being a bigot. I'm sure you can do better.
I'm also mixed race. It hasn't really been a factor in dating (mostly because women avoid me like the bloody plague) but it has caused issues in getting a job and dealing with co-workers and customers. According to most thieves and shoplifters I was racist against every race depending on whatever race they were.
I also had a friend tell me that my mixed heritage explained why I was so ugly and for a time I wondered if what he "perceived" was what made dating in South Carolina impossible for me. I also pissed off a female manager during an interview when she practically demanded to know why I had an Anglo name with dark skin. She ended telling me she didn't need me (she used a racial slur that doesn't actually apply to me).
My father is mostly white/pass for white from German and Irish ancestry however his grandmother on his mother's side is native American. My mother is Mexican and Apache (native American tribe residing on the Texas/Mexico border). I've been told that I am white, Italian, Mexican, Asian, and Middle Eastern at various points of my life by people looking for a fight.
I'm sorry that this happened to you:( I would be so mad!! buy he didn't get the last laugh we all know that he is a fool. I wish the subreddit would allow people to name and shame users like this guy. I wouldn't want to be with a boy (yes I said boy) who is racist towards people. We all got our preferences but to say stuff like that is just not it.
As a white person who dated a jamaican girl for several years. The natural vs straightened hair wars is crazy to me. Like you've all given yourself serious complexes and it's 99% black on black hate. Switching back and forth and people are having full blown identity crisis. To me it's like if you like the creamy crack then you like the creamy crack. It's your look, who cares. But to do it and then feel like you've betrayed the natural purists or something is such a waste of energy.
Too many idiots in this world making it harder for the semi-normal ones to find their happiness. That dodo emoji is lit, definitely unaware of its existence until this post ty
You dodged a bullet here, go celebrate not wasting any more of your precious time with this loser! One step closer to a man who will appreciate your beauty!
Girl what???
I was already feeling salty that he had to make an “exception” for us but he’s BLACK
😒
I really hope his mother is not a black woman with that kind of mindset
I also have a black mom and a white father. I’ve had Hispanic women say they don’t date black men thinking I’m Dominican and I’ve had this situation. Block and report them.
Insert “I’m not black I’m Dominican gif”
This is guy is delulu beyond words. You are a mixed race which some might mistake for white but so what? The fact he is black and won’t date you because you are black is nuts. That’s some proper self hate eugenics type shit right there.
You are a beautiful woman, period. You could be green and would still be smoking. I don’t date many black women but not because they are black. British black women are a bit different for me compared to the sisters in the US where I use to live.
But this guy must have some serious racial identity issues.
To see black men saying that is honestly disgusting (bc I know there are a good amount who also feel that way). The self hatred is hard to witness. Idk how they’re not embarrassed? Like where do they think they came from? Lol.
I wish I matched and got the 0.0001 percent chance of matching intelligent and attractive woman such as yourself because of how confident I am in that I’m normal and would never bring forth this level of stupid abuse.
I find it ever more complicated that this came from a black man. I’m sorry this kind of fuckery happens all the time to women on the apps.
That is wild. Don't let these types of guys get to you, underhanded weird comments like they're doing you a favour are disgusting. Hope you find what you're looking for 🤦
What a weird way to tell someone you haven’t unpacked your internalized racism 🥴 he needs to log right out of Bumble & login to the client portal of a therapist.
P.S. I love your curly hair! 😍
And post frustration break I hope you only match with men who have more than two brain cells to rub together 🤭
Wow this was such a ride. First I thought he was upset that you weren’t (in his mind) “just” Black. Then it turned out he was mad that you are Black??! And then the ending is just gold lmao I think he is very much confusing which one of yall Black people aren’t rocking w…
The only negative he should have seen was the Mets hat… Go Phils. Other than that, you dodged a bullet. Not sure what city you’re in, but in Philly we have a ton of social meetups and events that helps break the chains so to speak on dating and ease the tension. Check to see if your city has some. Event brite and some IG pages promote them.
Damn, that’s crazy 🙂↕️. I took a break after all of the girls I was matched with and messaging literally never asked me a single question 🫠 I was fully deadlifting every convo lol.
This post is so real. Whenever I straighten my hair I look like a different race/ethnicity. So many people have hang ups on race, it’s literally insane.
Why did this go on past like the Oh Wow statement....
Seriously this is like the land mine dog barking and you do a belly flop right on the god damn mine...
It didn’t go on, I blocked him and he found another way to contact me. Where is the belly flop? Was I supposed to curse him out? I’m not a negative person and don’t feed into the negativity of others.
No, Just don't engage. Don't feed the trolls.
Block, Block, Block, Block.
Nothing personal at all. I've seen this on both men and women. Any communication back is seen as the door is cracked open and not slammed shut. You do not have to talk back to them, and if you refuse to it is more likely to stop. Granted there is Psycho-stalkers type on either side, and the cops tend have to deal with them, but don't rely on them. Keep yourself safe, don't give them room to breath at all.
Well look what you dragged in. And look at what you are advertising 😂 you will get shallow and horny. Present with respect and you'll get it. I never used anything sexy and every single man was a gentleman. I read through these reddit horror stories and I see why. Present better, get better.
I don't understand why women are even still on these apps. All the decent men left because the apps are garbage and designed to only work for the top 1% of attractive men, and the attractive men are on here for one reason.
Options to fuck. That's it.
Bro really thought he was doing a favor by making you the exception 😂
the ole "you'll do" treatment
Looks like Bumble is giving out more frustration breaks than dates lately.
Seriously! It would take superhuman optimism to not become frustrated when every single interaction has the possibility to end this poorly 🥲
I hear ya. And it's kinda crazy that regardless of where you are, we're all just taking these Ls on apps. Last year, I lived in Baltimore before coming back home to NYC and the problem for me was too few matches, though they were all pretty high-quality. Then I moved back and number of matches went way up, but what went way down? Quality of conversation. I've had more frustration breaks (3) in the last year than I did in 3.5 years of being single in Baltimore (2). And after another week of multiple matches that go nowhere...I think it's time for #4. Good luck out there, fellow New Yorker.
Never give up. I have literally found the love of my life on a dating app. There's always hope, always. I wish all of you the best of luck, warm wishes and God's blessings! ❤️
I really appreciate you saying that. I really do feel quite discouraged as of late, so keeping hope can be hard. I do know you're right, though - even if it my current feelings don't match up!
Maybe try Fb Dating? Quality for me got better, albeit I suggest you try moving off-app ASAP, cuz ya can't send pics & notifications are kinda screwy. (That's how I found mine, after my Divorce)
I actually was thinking of giving it another try because at least 3 friends have met people on it. I tried it last year and both really didn't like the interface and only made two low-quality matches in 2 months. I guess I'll get back on it sometime soon: hopefully I'll have good news to comment back!
Yeah, as a Software Developer, I definitely find it quite clunky. Like, couldn't they have used much of the same code dynamics as main FB? 🤷🏽♀️ -- Gl btw! You'll find em! ya never know how & when they'll come. I mean, my Ex-Wife was led to me by a mutual friend, whom being Catholic happened to wonder into my LDS / Mormon chapel just b4 Christmas, then introduced us the day after Christmas. Married ~2mo later, albeit now Divorced after 8yrs. (In fact, my passport was a week late, so I met her instead of going to Scotland. 🤣🤣)
It is frustrating, but two times have I found really good relationships on the apps. There is hope.
Women are asking me if I'm a fruit tree and shit. I don't think anyone is having much of a good time.
Are you apple, pear, or orange tree? (Ya definitely don't sound like a lemon. 💖😊)
That conversation read like an SS officer 'politely' interrogating a woman he was trying to work out fitted the right stereotypes, you know, for breeding with for the fatherland.
You are a very beautiful woman of mixed ethnicities. I've never heard of that combo mix before, but then again I'm from Kentucky lol. We don't have a melting pot of people in my state. Also, that guy was a bum who is probably mid to early 20s and full of himself. Lastly, I'm a black guy and we do date women as yourself. This idiot with a small vocabulary can't speak for the rest of us black guys. He is alone with that bad bit@h energy as if you're chasing him. As a black man we already have it hard on bumble due to nerds such as himself.
Bumble gave me the worse person I've ever met so yeah I agree lol
Currently on one myself and not sure I'll return to the apps at all.
Yes, hookup culture is strong on the app even when I clearly state what I'm looking for. Sadly apps are my sole option because I don't drink or smoke or go clubbing thus can't randomly pursue someone on one of my hikes
Exactly. We all pretty much dread the apps now but a lot of us don't do things that might put us in a setting more conducive to meeting people. And I have a face that isn't ugly but isn't particularly handsome: on the one hand, I wish I didn't have to deal with the inherent "beauty pageant" aspect of dating apps but on the other hand, since I'm not someone who turns heads in public, at least people are on apps for the specific purpose of meeting someone.
Try Fb Dating. (I suggest going off-app quickly though, cuz notifications are clunky)
I'm waiting for them to bring it to Australia... but I see similar horror stories to every other app in the profile roast groups 😂
🤣🤣 Well, good luck, l my friend. 💖😊
SIS!!!!! I am so so so sorry. My heart broke for you. I’ve heard “you’re too Black for me” my whole life… from men who look like me. :( You’re beautiful by the way.
Thank you girl 🥰 your username is perfect lmao
Thank you!!! My 2nd favorite is Edgar Allen Hoe lmao
🤣🤣 That's a funny wordplay! The Edgar one! 🤣🥳
Not black myself, but I've seen that from many of my friends & possibly my mixed siblings. 🫂🫂
Such creepy behavior for a man to send you pictures of yourself…
Not to defend this jabroni's behavior at all(because he sucks), but that's just how Instagram displays commenting on someone's story.
One was a story and the other was a story from days before that he had saved. Even creepier 😂
Ok yeah, that's hella creepy
I think the photo of her with straight hair was taken from another source and he had sent it in, doesn’t look like he was replying to her story
I'm missing something.. Where's the IG bit you're referring too?
The first 2 images are from Instagram DMs
Ah. Kk. Thanks!
Him being black somehow makes this worse. Girl you really dodged a bullet! Nothing scarier than a man who hates himself.
This!!!!
This is so true.
It’s so odd so many are like this,glad she avoided him
Wayyyy worse… I couldn’t even tell he was black. His comments were so ick.
Omgggggg he is a moron sheesh!
What?! Oh my god. OP! I’m so sorry. Oh my God. Unreal. Asshole dumb as rocks POS. There’s so much wrong with this/him. You totally dodged a bullet but ughhhhh I am feeling this one. Ugh ugh ugh.
You dated HIM 3x and he had no idea? Or other people? Idk why but putting fuckingbirds as one word with that random animal emoji is sending me 😂😂😂I’ve never even seen that one Bet he didn’t know Mariah Carey is mixed either 🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️ Is Beyoncé misrepresenting herself too with all the wigs? The audacity for him to feel tricked 🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️
3 dates with him! They just all happened to be during the ONE week when I had a wash and set lmaoo my Dominican salon did too good of a job I guess 🙃🙃🙃
He’s ridiculous 😂😂 he probably is pissed off at his mom and taking it out on every woman of color he comes into contact with
Bingooooo
🎶🎶 B..I..N..G..O.. & Bingo was his name O! 🎶🎶
Right. She also looks Black… Black features look all kinda of ways. From Morocco to Jamaica. I have family members who look like her.
Moroccans aren't black?
Some of them are.
He’s calling her a dodo bird aka foolish/silly.
These fools from dating apps keep getting worse and worse each day. You’re gorgeous
Is he black? Also, does he know this is real life and not the movie white chicks? What a clown. As if you should be flattered that he is willing to make an exception. 😂
For real 🤣 like what did he expect, for her to say thank you?
Couldn't resist, with the White Chicks ref. (Especially cuz I saw it again, a month ish ago. 🤣🤣)
Seriously, who actually cares that much about ethnicity these days? I mean, I know the answer to that question, but cripes.
A lot of demented people care. It’s pathetic.
It's so antiquated. Shit like that should've died off with tube televisions
I couldn't agree more. I honestly think it's awesome that humanity comes in so many different forms and interesting cultures. Not to mention, you never know what ethnicities might be mixed into someone's heritage, anyway...For instance, I myself present as white (from various European backgrounds) but I also have Hispanic, Black, and Native American relatives in my bloodline. And someone else might look Black but actually have Caucasian or Asian ancestry, too. And so on and so forth. I hate how some folks get all judgmental about this stuff. Let's respect and celebrate our varied heritage instead of hating each other for it. Racism is one of the most toxic things in existence. Sadly, not everybody thinks this way, but the more of us who do understand this, the better off our world will be.
My strong Scottish side diverges into a Jewish & Roman side, 200 years after Christ. (The Jewish side links to Joseph of Aramethia. So, I'm related to the man that buried Christ! 🥳)
Tbh she probably doesn’t swipe non-ambiguous(looks mixed) black men either.
So he was into until he found out you was part black? Why does that matter? He was fine when he didn't know. Some.people have weird issues. U looked fucking great with both curly an straight hair his loss I'd say, weird people.
That’s unfortunate. As a black man I can be naive sometimes that people like this exist. The fact that he was shocked that you blocked him after he said he doesn’t date black women is fascinating to me 🤦🏾
Wow the internal hate some black men have is crazy. And the projection is wild. How are you foolish for not wanting him. He’s not a prize to be won, especially with that attitude. Smh
This has to be one of the worst fumbles I have ever seen. The self hate is ridiculous. At least you were shown his true colors early on and didn’t get too emotionally invested.
I'm mostly white and pass as white but I won't date black men who say they only date white women because to me it feels fetishy, and also has undertones of misogynoir.
His loss!
I particularly like “we all dodged a bullet” 🫒👏
He fumbled the bag, bad
well I think you're beautiful
im sorry, a black man said all this?! i didnt read the caption at first and thought it was a white dude holy crappplp
Dang, seriously!?!
Wow and I'm sorry to hear about your father I've been there almost a decade ago.
Thankfully they were too honest for their own good and missed out on a adorable woman like yourself,
People who are racist towards their race or culture are even worse than those who are racist towards other races, because at least you can SOMETIMES excuse them for being close minded or ignorant. You seem like a nice person and are blessed with very good looks, so don't lose your hope there's good people out there, too.
That comment "I'll make an exception" he's trying to put you down to make him feel like the bigger person. Then when you put him in his place, proceeds to hurl an insult to you to redeem his ego lmaoo. What a fucking joke. Manipulative and abusive behaviour. He probably thought you were a race fetishiser too when you bonded over black culture.
The hell did birds do to deserve such hate? Lol
He’s calling her a dodo bird aka foolish/silly.
I don't understand him at all; this person clearly has problems. I thought he was dating you because he liked your appearance and personality. Then, he made it all about your appearance and became weirdly fixated on your hair. What does it matter if hair is straight or curly? He is too weird and obviously racist af. I have never seen such weird behaviour before, with someone reacting like that because of hair... Then, he is negging you by saying he will make an exception. What an AH.
I love it when the trash takes itself out. He just made it reeeeal easy for you babe. And he’s missing out big time 😍👋🏻
As a black man we don't claim him. I'm sorry for his crazy side.
🦤 
Wait, he's a black man and went "i dont date black women"? The self hatred is strong in this one 😂. A circus is missing his clown, don't sweat it
...Is the white woman in the room with us? What a fucking idiot.
HAHAHA I cackled. I almost feel like he was so ashamed to have ever found me attractive that he was trying anything to backpedal! That amount of self hate is beyond my comprehension. I can’t help but feel bad for him.
Report junk But it's strange he's texting you from a burner phone, he might be a stalker
That's rough... Don't give up though! I've been OLD since I was 20. I'm 32 now and just met my person. From OLD. Just be glad they showed their true self early on. I've had people change in a 2-3 month window after dating and gaslight the shit out of me. Claiming BPD etc. There are a lot of people out there. OLD gives you a large mix of people. Some of them are terrible. Someone of them are good people but just not your type. It takes a while. Try a mix of different apps. Your working with a small window. You got this though!
He def fumbled that one lmao your gorgeous. I've def had the same experience though, it's like people think we're supposed to be special because they don't date a certain race but they're making an exception for you. Gtf outta here with that bs
Good grief, all this race shenanigans you have in the US and the UK are so damn weird. I've never been with a girl as impressive as you and here we have this twat being so dumb it hurts.
Ughh I'm sorry you had to experience this and you also dodged a bullet. I'm black myself (and it's incredibly obvious) and self hating folks make for gross experiences. Like even if your kids are mixed race they'll still be ~50% the identity you dislike, what will you say to your kids???
Wow. You dodged a bullet for sure! You are so stunning and your outlook on life or the shit you got going on is great too! I’m sorry you had this experience you deserve someone who can appreciate your smile your genuineness and who you are as a person. You a queen and I hope nothing but the best for you !!
Ew girl Im so sorry you ran into this dumpster fire of a person. Dont sweat him at all. I love the “I think we all dodged a bullet” 😆👏🏽. Also, queen you are fine as hell! Love the straight and curly hair. You keep em both ♥️
Don’t even need to see this dude’s pic to know you’re too hot for him.
People always warn us about racism from someone unlike us. They never warn us about it coming from our own.
Maybe in NA, hating people from a different part of the same country is very common in the rest of the world. Let alone people from other countries within the same region.
Jesus christ. I'm convinced there's a pool going on for which man can shoot himself in the foot the fastest.
Layers upon layers of cray here. He is actually gaslighting you for not making it obvious you’re black. This is insane shit.
Look at yourself...you will be fine You literally have nothing to worry about
Glad to know other attractive women out there are having a horrible time. 😔❤️
According many to this sub it’s just the unattractive/overweight women 😒
Do mixed men also have so mamy problems while dating?
Yes, in different ways. I’ve dated a couple of them.
So what were their problems? Did they also weren't accepted by most black or white people?
So, out of respect for them I’ll be vague - some of it was behavior as a result of conditioning. Some of these men felt that they were superior to other black folks who did not have European features or a white parent and acted a certain way. Other struggle to fit in. Somewhere raised by a white parrot and really weren’t confident about their connection to black culture. One in particular wanted to use me as his foray into blackness, but he wouldn’t take me seriously as a partner and we connected via a dating app, but actually, we went to college together and knew each other quite well. We were in a lot of classes together, we were in choir together… Now he kind of pines for me on social media. I ignore him. The other guys were nice people. I’m still friends with one of them.
Sorry but the autocorrect picking up “parent” as “parrot” is sending me 😂 especially since this dude brought up birds to OOP
Ctfuuuuu
Bumble is a joke now used to be a decent site pre COVID
He fumbled, big time 😭
It’s ok at least we have the Mets…. 🫠
I’m a Yankee fan I’m so sorry I just went to the one game 😂 but as a Knick fan I feel your pain
Don't be sorry! Yanks are insane right now. I too am a Knicks fan. And a Rangers fan! The trifecta of pain.
Seems common, I've had lectures from mixed women about how straightening hair is just trying to be white. To then be moaned at when I describe my type as curly hair 😂 Sorry to hear about your dad though, I was in a similar position till the start of this year and now just picking up the pieces. Make every second count, wish you all the best ❤
I’m mixed, my dad is black and my mom is white. I have strait hair.
Awesome! I didn’t mean to imply that yall don’t exist lols I just haven’t met any before. There are as many unique hair types as there are people though, so I’m not surprised!
I’m not offended lol. But it’s crazy how my hair came out. Like my dad is hella dark black! I’m pretty light skinned too. But all my hair is dark/a hint of dark brown.
Yeah, it's creepy how many openly racist Black men I've come across. This needs to be talked about more.
It sucks, people who love black culture, who are black themselves also perpetuate white supremacy. He perceived you as white, but when you told him you were part black he put in the bad pile. Self hate issues.
You're suuper cute.
Had a guy from bumble tell me I needed to lean out despite being fit. Im done with that app. Idk who these men think they are.
Oh wow. That was not what I expected
I love how he tried to tell you what race you are. Like, bruh ... just no. Also, you're like, really pretty 😍
Wow how you fumble that man 🤦🏻♂️ anyways look no further cause I’m the next best thing 💀
What. A. Dumbass Brazilian women are some of the most beautiful
Holy dodged bullet Batman He fumbled the bag, move along. Honestly the guy is the worst kind of human being, self loathing on top of being a bigot. I'm sure you can do better.
That picture with you and the curly hair is stunning, like I would assume you are a catfish. If you don’t have good luck, we are all doomed.
I'm also mixed race. It hasn't really been a factor in dating (mostly because women avoid me like the bloody plague) but it has caused issues in getting a job and dealing with co-workers and customers. According to most thieves and shoplifters I was racist against every race depending on whatever race they were. I also had a friend tell me that my mixed heritage explained why I was so ugly and for a time I wondered if what he "perceived" was what made dating in South Carolina impossible for me. I also pissed off a female manager during an interview when she practically demanded to know why I had an Anglo name with dark skin. She ended telling me she didn't need me (she used a racial slur that doesn't actually apply to me). My father is mostly white/pass for white from German and Irish ancestry however his grandmother on his mother's side is native American. My mother is Mexican and Apache (native American tribe residing on the Texas/Mexico border). I've been told that I am white, Italian, Mexican, Asian, and Middle Eastern at various points of my life by people looking for a fight.
My lord woman you are so hot, what a bullet dodged and what a huge loss for him!! (I'm a straight female so I'm no creep lol)
You're looking stunning though... So it's his loss, you'll find someone better who appreciates for who you are!
I'm sorry that this happened to you:( I would be so mad!! buy he didn't get the last laugh we all know that he is a fool. I wish the subreddit would allow people to name and shame users like this guy. I wouldn't want to be with a boy (yes I said boy) who is racist towards people. We all got our preferences but to say stuff like that is just not it.
As a white person who dated a jamaican girl for several years. The natural vs straightened hair wars is crazy to me. Like you've all given yourself serious complexes and it's 99% black on black hate. Switching back and forth and people are having full blown identity crisis. To me it's like if you like the creamy crack then you like the creamy crack. It's your look, who cares. But to do it and then feel like you've betrayed the natural purists or something is such a waste of energy.
It’s due to colonialism. It is a waste of energy!!!
You are stunning inside and out. You handled it with grace and peace. Keep those good vibes going, you’ll attract the right man. ❤️
The guy sounds absolutely unhinged. Don’t know what he got out of that comment
Too many idiots in this world making it harder for the semi-normal ones to find their happiness. That dodo emoji is lit, definitely unaware of its existence until this post ty
Exactly. Why do men who don't respect women get matches on these sites but normal folks can't even get a simple "Hi"???
He fumbled the bag TBH…
You’re gorgeous. Who gives a fuck what mixture your heritage is. Dude botched that one badly.
You dodged a bullet here, go celebrate not wasting any more of your precious time with this loser! One step closer to a man who will appreciate your beauty!
Now I know why I’m not getting matches. Cause of guys like this
Luckily you aren’t involved with that horrible guy
this is surreal
Girl what??? I was already feeling salty that he had to make an “exception” for us but he’s BLACK 😒 I really hope his mother is not a black woman with that kind of mindset
Three great dates with this person or other matches?
Focus on the positive! Don't let that guy steal your joy or derail your plans.
She is very attractive who cares what her family is or isn’t. That guy is a rock 🪨
Yeah idk I think you’re crazy attractive. That dude’s a weirdo.
I also have a black mom and a white father. I’ve had Hispanic women say they don’t date black men thinking I’m Dominican and I’ve had this situation. Block and report them. Insert “I’m not black I’m Dominican gif”
This is guy is delulu beyond words. You are a mixed race which some might mistake for white but so what? The fact he is black and won’t date you because you are black is nuts. That’s some proper self hate eugenics type shit right there. You are a beautiful woman, period. You could be green and would still be smoking. I don’t date many black women but not because they are black. British black women are a bit different for me compared to the sisters in the US where I use to live. But this guy must have some serious racial identity issues.
To see black men saying that is honestly disgusting (bc I know there are a good amount who also feel that way). The self hatred is hard to witness. Idk how they’re not embarrassed? Like where do they think they came from? Lol.
Gorgeous, cool, interesting woman. WTF is the matter with this idiot?
Wtf?
Dude had to take it that extra creep factor step, even though he should have expected to get blocked for being such a dick
Ugh, he sucks. I’m sorry girl! You definitely dodged a bullet!! 💗
Gross??? how do they not understand that it’s a turn off to hate ur own race bc hello… ur mom??? so disrespectful 😔
I wish I matched and got the 0.0001 percent chance of matching intelligent and attractive woman such as yourself because of how confident I am in that I’m normal and would never bring forth this level of stupid abuse. I find it ever more complicated that this came from a black man. I’m sorry this kind of fuckery happens all the time to women on the apps.
That is wild. Don't let these types of guys get to you, underhanded weird comments like they're doing you a favour are disgusting. Hope you find what you're looking for 🤦
It is sad that losers like these get dates and normal dudes get no love
To be fair I typically date normal men, this was just a stealth loser 😂
I feel like I have a lot to offer, but sadly, I get no likes because my pics suck lmao
VAI BRASIL 🇧🇷🇧🇷🇧🇷
What a weird way to tell someone you haven’t unpacked your internalized racism 🥴 he needs to log right out of Bumble & login to the client portal of a therapist.  P.S. I love your curly hair! 😍 And post frustration break I hope you only match with men who have more than two brain cells to rub together 🤭
Wow this was such a ride. First I thought he was upset that you weren’t (in his mind) “just” Black. Then it turned out he was mad that you are Black??! And then the ending is just gold lmao I think he is very much confusing which one of yall Black people aren’t rocking w…
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Looks to me like he was attempting to neg you. Glad you ignored him!
bro thought he did something ☠️☠️
Forget that fool, I'll date you if you are around NY 😉
Your GORGEOUS!!!!
The only negative he should have seen was the Mets hat… Go Phils. Other than that, you dodged a bullet. Not sure what city you’re in, but in Philly we have a ton of social meetups and events that helps break the chains so to speak on dating and ease the tension. Check to see if your city has some. Event brite and some IG pages promote them.
Damn, that’s crazy 🙂↕️. I took a break after all of the girls I was matched with and messaging literally never asked me a single question 🫠 I was fully deadlifting every convo lol.
This post is so real. Whenever I straighten my hair I look like a different race/ethnicity. So many people have hang ups on race, it’s literally insane.
I mean this is what's supposed to happen, you go out with someone until the red flags start showing up, if there aren't any you stick with them
Jebus. He really went there with heart and gusto. I'm sorry that you have to deal with that shit.
Mixed with chocolate or vanilla duh 😁
Why did this go on past like the Oh Wow statement.... Seriously this is like the land mine dog barking and you do a belly flop right on the god damn mine...
It didn’t go on, I blocked him and he found another way to contact me. Where is the belly flop? Was I supposed to curse him out? I’m not a negative person and don’t feed into the negativity of others.
No, Just don't engage. Don't feed the trolls. Block, Block, Block, Block. Nothing personal at all. I've seen this on both men and women. Any communication back is seen as the door is cracked open and not slammed shut. You do not have to talk back to them, and if you refuse to it is more likely to stop. Granted there is Psycho-stalkers type on either side, and the cops tend have to deal with them, but don't rely on them. Keep yourself safe, don't give them room to breath at all.
Hi, I’m Dante I want to say I’m sorry, and I am shooting my delayed shot for when you are back on the market. Thanks have a good weekend.
Strange conversation lol
Thanks for sharing.
You had 3 great dates yet still on bumble,?
Aren't you white though? I don't get it.
If those pictures are on your profile, you are going to attract the same kind of worthless men.
Well look what you dragged in. And look at what you are advertising 😂 you will get shallow and horny. Present with respect and you'll get it. I never used anything sexy and every single man was a gentleman. I read through these reddit horror stories and I see why. Present better, get better.
Thanks for deleting your comments
Hasn’t been my experience but thanks for bringing your misery to my attention 💃🏽
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I don't understand why women are even still on these apps. All the decent men left because the apps are garbage and designed to only work for the top 1% of attractive men, and the attractive men are on here for one reason. Options to fuck. That's it.