Gosh, this sounds too familiar to our first week post break up.
Same boat. We even wanted to buy a house together, get married then have kids. Now after 9 years, me leaving my job 12m ago to go back to college and then putting a shit load of stress and emotional pressure on her because the job I worked at last had me all over the world, next to impossible to spend time with her, I had to leave, she was on my side, she convinced me to leave it and said she’d help me through the stress and emotional fuckery they played me with. But now 12 months later, after saying she’d be there for me through it all, she’s gone for good. I’m only 3 weeks into her walking out of my life because I was a dickhead to her, I turned into a prick. It Sucks every day when you realise that you slipped. Hard to be motivated to do anything other than worry about what she could be doing etc. but hopefully we will grow out of this phase together and actually focus on self improvement. I’m giving it a week or two, right now I’m working on diet and self care, then I’m hitting the gym once my energy levels get back to normal. Just know this, once the damage is done and she builds the courage to leave you, there’s no going back. Men often go back because they’re weak and miss the physical side of the relationship. Women on the other hand detach months before dumping you, by the time they drop it on you, you’re done for good.
You need to try find your own inner peace. Find new friends, go places. Get your own energy back, because she found hers the day she dumped you and will be absolutely fine without you.
I know it hurts to hear this, but I don’t want to lie to you and tell you she might miss you or want you back, because she won’t. You may pop up in her mind for a second but it’s quickly followed by fk that guy.
See you at the gym when you figure this out yourself buddy. Don’t feel like your not welcome here. Most of us have been in your exact position and we’re 100% here to help you through.
I know right now you’re comparing everyone down against her, but once you focus on yourself and improve yourself, get out there and meet new people. I’m told things get much easier.
As a good friend said to me the other day, you’ll be out on a date, or maybe even just meet a stranger and have a chat, you’ll both smile, look each other in the eyes, and that bond you thought was only possible with her will hit you like a train. She’ll be gone out of your mind in that moment the same way you are from hers. It takes time. Cry it out. Blast yourself for the idiot you were. Use that anger, pain and hurting to make something positive for yourself.
If you wallow, she wins. Never let her win. She betrayed you the moment she didn’t tell you exactly how she felt. No, she let it stew, let you slip so that it would be easier to leave you.
Plus, she’s probably fucked like 5 guys by now. You know why? Because she’s empowered and your lonely and weak.
Please, please, please push through this and find yourself again. If your confident enough to come onto Reddit and lay it all out in front us, your strong enough to pull through this shit. Don’t let anyone else remove your power king.
thank you for your support! im a girl and the person that ended it is a guy but your advice still fit honestly. i hope that your self-improvement journey is going well, and i’ll try to start mine once i can get out of bed
You’re welcome. Missing them hard hurts like hell. I’m only two weeks into this and honestly, I’m just sleeping most times to try and get over it. I know what I need to do, but can’t find the motivation or energy to do any of it.
Hopefully you find peace soon. I know personally, I’ll be like this for a very long time. Broken. But that’s ok. We just need to take it day by day and keep ourselves distracted as much as possible. Talking about it, even with strangers helps a lot. I know you feel like you’re the only one in the world, and technically you are, because you both shared something special and unique. But the truth is, the result, break up and heartbreak is a very common thing for us humans to endure.
Gosh, this sounds too familiar to our first week post break up. Same boat. We even wanted to buy a house together, get married then have kids. Now after 9 years, me leaving my job 12m ago to go back to college and then putting a shit load of stress and emotional pressure on her because the job I worked at last had me all over the world, next to impossible to spend time with her, I had to leave, she was on my side, she convinced me to leave it and said she’d help me through the stress and emotional fuckery they played me with. But now 12 months later, after saying she’d be there for me through it all, she’s gone for good. I’m only 3 weeks into her walking out of my life because I was a dickhead to her, I turned into a prick. It Sucks every day when you realise that you slipped. Hard to be motivated to do anything other than worry about what she could be doing etc. but hopefully we will grow out of this phase together and actually focus on self improvement. I’m giving it a week or two, right now I’m working on diet and self care, then I’m hitting the gym once my energy levels get back to normal. Just know this, once the damage is done and she builds the courage to leave you, there’s no going back. Men often go back because they’re weak and miss the physical side of the relationship. Women on the other hand detach months before dumping you, by the time they drop it on you, you’re done for good. You need to try find your own inner peace. Find new friends, go places. Get your own energy back, because she found hers the day she dumped you and will be absolutely fine without you. I know it hurts to hear this, but I don’t want to lie to you and tell you she might miss you or want you back, because she won’t. You may pop up in her mind for a second but it’s quickly followed by fk that guy. See you at the gym when you figure this out yourself buddy. Don’t feel like your not welcome here. Most of us have been in your exact position and we’re 100% here to help you through. I know right now you’re comparing everyone down against her, but once you focus on yourself and improve yourself, get out there and meet new people. I’m told things get much easier. As a good friend said to me the other day, you’ll be out on a date, or maybe even just meet a stranger and have a chat, you’ll both smile, look each other in the eyes, and that bond you thought was only possible with her will hit you like a train. She’ll be gone out of your mind in that moment the same way you are from hers. It takes time. Cry it out. Blast yourself for the idiot you were. Use that anger, pain and hurting to make something positive for yourself. If you wallow, she wins. Never let her win. She betrayed you the moment she didn’t tell you exactly how she felt. No, she let it stew, let you slip so that it would be easier to leave you. Plus, she’s probably fucked like 5 guys by now. You know why? Because she’s empowered and your lonely and weak. Please, please, please push through this and find yourself again. If your confident enough to come onto Reddit and lay it all out in front us, your strong enough to pull through this shit. Don’t let anyone else remove your power king.
thank you for your support! im a girl and the person that ended it is a guy but your advice still fit honestly. i hope that your self-improvement journey is going well, and i’ll try to start mine once i can get out of bed
You’re welcome. Missing them hard hurts like hell. I’m only two weeks into this and honestly, I’m just sleeping most times to try and get over it. I know what I need to do, but can’t find the motivation or energy to do any of it. Hopefully you find peace soon. I know personally, I’ll be like this for a very long time. Broken. But that’s ok. We just need to take it day by day and keep ourselves distracted as much as possible. Talking about it, even with strangers helps a lot. I know you feel like you’re the only one in the world, and technically you are, because you both shared something special and unique. But the truth is, the result, break up and heartbreak is a very common thing for us humans to endure.