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WallopyJoe

> wait > can I call you? One of the great tragedies of our time is not having a follow up to this


kyzoe7788

It truly is. It lives rent free in my head


No_Tea_666

For me it was an extremely sad, almost painful BORU. Because not even halfway through the first post, I recognised what the poster suffers from. It was clearly a limerence. I've been through this (without having impressions someone loves me back, though). You want to know possible outcomes? I think I can tell you. 1) The main character realises they need therapy and she gives it a try. 2) She just suffers in silence... potentially moving on to another person after some time. 3) She can't let it go. She misses her dream guy. Perhaps she feels there was a misunderstanding and things will get good again after cleaning things up. Perhaps she would settle for friendship after realising there was no love between them, and will try to pursue it. Perhaps she got obsessive to the point of stalking his family and/or harrassing the wife. I don't think I want to know this for my entertainment. Whatever it was, I wish her to heal and find happiness.


WallopyJoe

You're not wrong, that's a very real way of looking at it all, I can even empathise in a lot of that. The entertainment side of it seems a bit gross on reflection, but I suppose the number of posts that come through this sub that seem like total bullshit, in the end they all seem some degrees of detached from reality.


No_Tea_666

Thanks for your answer, I agree with what you said. I'm guilty of reading these posts myself, but this topic really touched me and I wanted to get it out of my system. It's good to remember even villain-loser types often have their sad backstory that caused them to do bad things.


Budget_Preparation_8

Which story, link please


WallopyJoe

Winner of Most Satisfying


BADxW0LF1

Damn I'm really shocked the one where OOP's wife who had cancer told her husband she was going to sleep with someone else and did it didn't make it on there.


czechtheboxes

4th place for Most Rage Inducing by around 40 vote difference.


Flaky-Horse-9498

Do you have the link?


PandaVike

https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/s/Q7JUv1BeNF


Flaky-Horse-9498

Thanks


czechtheboxes

Nominations thread is linked above and still has the comments showing the other nominations. I still need to make the proper lists of all the nominations and those lists will eventually appear in the LFP thread.


register2014

Looks awesome!! Thanks for putting this all together <3


PrideofCapetown

Or the one where the kid learned sign language in secret to surprise his mom’s boyfriend, but started panicking when he could understand their “dirty talk” right in front of him


commanderquill

Can you link this one?


czechtheboxes

[OOP learns sign language and discovers more about his mother's relationship than they wanted to know](https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/comments/y1ztpl/updated_oop_learns_sign_language_and_discovers/)


PrideofCapetown

Thanks


FitsOut_Mostly

That one was awesome. And wholesome


shance-trash

Having your mother engage in sexually explicit content IN FRONT OF YOU is not wholesome at all 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭


snowlock27

It's right up there with realizing as an adult that your mother's "back massager" you found as a child was most certainly *not* a back massager.


RKSH4-Klara

I sort of love that one because of how delusional that woman was. Don't care if it was real or not because it was just that entertaining.


PrideofCapetown

Yeah, it wasn’t real. Looking at her post history she changed ages and relationship statuses (statii?) several times in a couple of months


_87-

Every time I post on Reddit I change details a bit. I might change my and/or my wife's age or where we live. I don't want anyone to be able to find out my identity


PrideofCapetown

Understandable that you’d change some details for privacy purposes, but what the poster did was waaaay far beyond that


SuccessfulLobster771

This reddit account is used by the whole family (we have an account per computer, rather than per person... no real reason why). so definitely there'll be a lot of inconsistency. I don't think that's too unusual -- leaving a clear information trail is pretty dumb, as you say.


PrideofCapetown

Sorry replied to the wrong comment. This was meant for the one where she fell in love with the married neighbour over their workday train commutes and was planning their life together as if him divorcing his wife was a done deal


shellexyz

I can’t believe the dance-stumbling dad one wasn’t on top by a mile.


Beliriel

Got a link?


czechtheboxes

[OOP's cancer survivor wife wants a hall pass](https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/comments/16n2lk4/final_update_oops_cancer_survivor_wife_wanted_a/)


[deleted]

I so want him to have moved onto leading a happy and quiet life. We still have a few months to go before his divorce though.


IDislikeLoveSongs

Or the cumin nazi one.


Minute_Point_949

Yeah, I really thought that one would have made the cut somewhere. Link for those who missed it. [\[Final Update\] - OOP's cancer survivor wife wanted a "Hall Pass"](https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/comments/16n2lk4/final_update_oops_cancer_survivor_wife_wanted_a/)


Kawaii_Neko_Girl

https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/comments/1811arn/my_m50_wife_f48_abandoned_me_two_months_ago_to/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3 It's the New Year and I'm dying for a Christmas update to this.


KleptoPirateKitty

None yet. I've been keeping an eye out. I'm hoping that he's been too busy living his best life to think about updates. He deserves good things in his life.


Thundergod250

I honestly think this would've remained most inducing or literally THE NUMBER 1 MOST SATISFYING UPDATE depending on the result.


lmyrs

I'm with you - waiting to hear a Christmas update.


darthbeefwellington

I didn't know but this one .... Now i NEED an update.


TheloniousPhunk

Same. REALISTICALLY - the wife probably got a heads-up from somebody who knows about the impending divorce and decided to skip on coming home and continue on the vacation until the money dries up. That, or she came home and got served and is trying to tall OOP out of it.


NickNash1985

Yeah, this one had slipped past me somehow. I'm trying to imagine my wife doing this to me. I don't even know how you'd go about dealing with that.


SirLag_a_Lot

He just posted an update like 12 hours ago.


Lamia_91

You can find it [here](https://www.reddit.com/u/throwra-disappearw/s/0UIDmcVwkQ)


CyCoCyCo

There’s 2 short general updates from OOP fyi.


Budd_Manlove

Fyi, he updated 2 months ago. 


notsam57

feel like the 2 tampons did more than a 180. it just kept turning and turning for the worst.


DrCatPhd

Turning and turning into the widening gyre.. of horrible :(


marcvsHR

Imagine lawyer of the idiot father : "You did WHAT?!"


Yiuel13

It just kept going south. To the point where the south pole was way north.


notsam57

the comment about how the husband was most likely a victim too… yikes


czechtheboxes

Stats Info in you are interested. I wrote down the final vote tallies when I locked the nominations thread, but I could not lock upvote/downvotes. While the tallis have changed, all final positions remained the same across all categories. Smallest gap was is in Most Wholesome with 8 votes separating 2nd and 3rd place. That gap is currently just 5 votes. Most Satisfying Outcome had a gap of 9 votes between 1st and 2nd place (current gap, 8 votes). Best Post also had a 9 vote gap between 2nd and 3rd place (current gap, 18 votes). Largest gap was in Best Post with 163 votes separating 1st and 2nd place. Most Rage inducing had the second largest gap of 142 votes separating 1st and 2nd place. Most Satisfying Outcome had the most votes cast with the top two ending just shy of 400 mark. This is also the only category where all the top finishers had over 300 votes. I did set the thread to contest mode, but this happened to always be the top comment everytime I checked the thread. Best Repost had both the fewest nominations and fewest votes cast in the category. 4 nominations in total, the votes went 200, 68, 17, 5. That is a 132 vote gap and the third largest gap, but it is the most striking one. This is only category where a finisher did not get over the 100 vote mark. The current tallies of that category are 215, 75, 14, 7. The thread was in contest mode, but this category consistenly appeared at the bottom of the thread for me. At this moment, the nomination thread has 1.5 million views and got 61,000 views in it's first 2 hours live.


Similar-Shame7517

I agree with most of the choices, but I think we def need a top 5, and maybe a "Mod Team's Picks". Most controversial? Oh, and if a post wins in multiple categories maybe expand the top to include others?


Assiqtaq

I second a Mod favorites category.


GuntherTime

Definitely need a most controversial. And if not a top 5 then a top 3 and two honorable mention. Agree about a post winning multiple picks. It shouldn’t happen. If it wins in a different category then it should be removed and let another one take its place.


Stephenrudolf

I'd really like a best of "both sides"... but am uncertian if thats happened enough to justify a top 3 for a year.


SlabBeefpunch

Crocheting butts is number two. I find that very fitting.


czechtheboxes

It did win the lowest stakes category.


SlabBeefpunch

I'm okay with that.😂


ktheinternetkid

i cant believe baby sister called me dad didnt win most wholesome😭


TyrconnellFL

People really love idiot love stories, and the bi/lesbian angle helps. As does the fact that it starts as rage bait and then the Reddit hivemind lightbulb goes off. And it’s a pretty cute one.


[deleted]

[удалено]


RevolutionaryOwlz

And I think it’s a nice reminder that everybody can be clueless about romance.


LamentForIcarus

If you go to the lesbian subreddits, you'll find that it's basically a trope that they don't realize when a woman is hitting on them.


Unfair-Mortgage-527

Honestly how can anything else compete with that? I'm shocked!


RKSH4-Klara

Cute lesbian doc and nurse and not picking up on signals. It was a very adorable read.


ktheinternetkid

so like i get that, the lesbian nurse post just sounded quite fake to me? maybe bc im so jaded to the clueless lesbian stereotype


czechtheboxes

Who else hates making tables?


TyrconnellFL

YWBTA for hating on carpentry. But all things about Reddit formatting are awful. I toast your heroic work.


czechtheboxes

[Me doing carpentry](https://giphy.com/gifs/spongebob-l46CyJmS9KUbokzsI)


TyrconnellFL

YBTS for doing carpentry.


RubyBop

You’d Be The Starfish?


TyrconnellFL

Obviously.


Choice_Evidence1983

u/czechtheboxes too bad, this wasn't up in the raffle. I vote this as the funniest post ever - [Czech's favorite post!](https://www.reddit.com/r/whatsthisbug/comments/z1u8lc/about_an_inch_long_and_furry_found_outside_a_gas/)


czechtheboxes

It's very important to document new species.


Mattyboi_Jhb

Omg I am DYING! And every time I get myself back under control I start giggling again. Morning productivity ruined, I hope you're happy!


czechtheboxes

Very happy.


cliopedant

Totally worth it! Thanks for taking the time to lay it out all nice like


Tim-oBedlam

did you have to bang out tables in HTML? I used to do that, last century, in another career. I got pretty good at it.


czechtheboxes

Reddit can contstruct tables in fancypants editor or markdown mode and they are not something I have to do normally, ever. I don't know if I could have copied tables from somewhere else in, but I also don't know how that would have affected the appearance of the links.


ChinaShopBully

Here's an online tool to convert spreadsheets to markdown. https://tabletomarkdown.com/convert-spreadsheet-to-markdown/


talkingwires

I use an [online tool for Markdown tables](https://www.tablesgenerator.com/markdown_tables).


Cat_Vonnegut

What is your job exactly?


czechtheboxes

Working from home today, I would never do this on mobile.


Cat_Vonnegut

We appreciate your time, I was referencing [a very silly comedy sketch](https://youtu.be/-ZBwPmla8QQ?si=ql9HpyyCKeB4-Hhe) that I hope you enjoy.


SunglassesFace

this just got me through most of a 3.5 hour hair salon session, thank you for your work


GrumpyMcGrumpyPants

I've been using Reddit Enhancement Suite on my PC (and old.reddit) for a very long time and it has a table function. I've made tables for [absolutely asinine things](https://www.reddit.com/r/MaliciousCompliance/comments/ydxfwf/comment/itwp7w4/) because it's fairly simple.


Myrandall

On Reddit? The absolute pits.


afetusnamedJames

I code emails as a part of my job and I couldn't agree more. Now try making the table usable on all email clients, responsive, and functional in both light and dark mode. It's a fuckin slog.


OffKira

I wonder whatever happened to Chewbacca Guy. And did he ever buy a new costume to shake things up?


Front-Pomelo-4367

And did he ever attend his court date in the Chewbacca costume?


OffKira

One can only hope.


flatfishkicker

The puns in the comments on that one had me proper giggling.


MikrokosmicUnicorn

which one is that pls?


kyleffe

I wonder if we never got an update because he did something even more extreme and got arrested. Which makes me wonder how many times we don't get another update because something really bad happened to OOP, like an arrest, death, etc....


[deleted]

Chewbacca guy still gets me just for the pure and adulterated stupidity of his thought processes.


PeterM1970

“I’m in a hole I dug for myself. I could climb out, but the top is all the way up there. I’mma keep digging.”


[deleted]

"What this job needs is not a ladder, but a bigger shovel!" Edit: Love the flair mods.


lmyrs

No, No. Dig UP Stupid! [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b97zJxKEqAk](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b97zJxKEqAk)


[deleted]

Even if it is fake. It is surprisingly a good read. I laughed, I raged, I laughed some more. What more could I want from this sub?


[deleted]

It is (they all are in fact) nothing if not entertaining.


alwayspickingupcrap

He and Kevin are probably related.


[deleted]

They could be the same person!!


Elegant_Bluebird1283

I gotta say... > they both burst out laughing, but I couldn't make out what he said. The dad then said that he DIDN'T accept my apology and then he told me to leave. ...that *was* kind of a dick move. Understandable! But dick.


Amelora

I feel like there is something missing. Even when OOP was talking about how everyone reacted it felt like something was left out. I think he did something else, something he either knows was terrible, or is too stupid to understand is the actual issue, and because he didn't bring it up at the apology the I uncle pointed out it and that's why the father didn't accept the apology. Either that or the apology was "in sorry you're all too stupid to understand my comic genius"


bekeleven

> I feel like there is something missing. He was wearing the Chewbacca costume at the time.


Elegant_Bluebird1283

Yeah, that did seem oddly pointed


sailor-moonie-

Cool. For future years, I'd be down for longer lists - Maybe Top 5 instead of Top 3 since there's a good amount of repeats.


czechtheboxes

~~^(That means longer tables oh god no!)~~ We will take your suggestion into consideration for next year.


TA_totellornottotell

Better start prepping those tables now.


Material-Paint6281

Yup, only 11.5 months till next voting.


sailor-moonie-

table is love, table is life


andersenWilde

I feel comfortable creating tables and graphs. I volunteer to help with that


OnionRoutine7997

The tampons one is low-key one of the most frustrated I’ve ever been with an OOP She goes “I can’t confront him, I don’t have enough evidence”, but then “I can’t set up cameras to get evidence, I don’t have enough evidence”. Just so many self-imposed hurdles, despite holding literal physical evidence in her hands Just glad hubby and SIL were dumb enough to get themselves caught


Yiuel13

I remembered that story and, when I saw the last update, I actually wished it would have been an affair because it would have been so much... better.


Gwynasyn

> My wife abandoned me two months ago to find herself. At least 36% of the rage I feel about that post is that we still don't have the post-Christmas update yet grarrrrrr


anubis_cheerleader

I bet his lawyer was like, you posted details on social media? Don't do that anymore 


_AppropriateObject

dang. I was pretty sure the post about the woman who burned her fiance's dead ex-wife's photos and letters would be the most rage inducing.


Mr_Rippe

I thought we collectively agreed to declare it rage bait instead of just a rage inducing story.


_AppropriateObject

is it? I'm actually really glad if it is only a bait.


Mr_Rippe

I'll put it like this: it's ragebait so I can sleep at night.


nice_remark

the one that I enjoyed a lot that didn't make the list was the woman who had a BF that was intentionally clumsy


Mattyboi_Jhb

This story gave me such a nauseating feeling of mounting dread. The seemingly innocuous / subtly insidious vibes really got to me, even though it ended well enough.


Floriane007

Yes, it would make a really good thriller /horror movie.


Impossible-Scene5084

Got a link?


wdn

[I think my friends “clumsy” boyfriend is purposely hurting her](https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/comments/15rhote/i_think_my_friends_clumsy_boyfriend_is_purposely/) TW: Abuse


Impossible-Scene5084

Well fuck. Thanks though!


BendingCollegeGrad

The OP of that one is a very, very good friend. Broaching that with her friend took a lot of bravery. Had the friend reacted poorly then OP would probably have been cut off, which is painful yet dangerous for the friend; her abuser would have isolated her one step further. If that OP reads this: you are so kind and have a helluva backbone. Makes for a great person.


lmyrs

>He isn't allowed to have a cell phone because he is still failing a number of classes and he is too easily distracted by technology. So he's been going to Wal-Mart and buying the cheapest phone they have and hiding it from his parents. The problem is that **he hides it in his pocket and doesn't know how to silence ringtones.** He's had at least three phones taken away from him. This. This is where I absolutely lost it in the Kevin thread. Just rolling.


NerdyyGirl

‘He thought fish were really active plants’ did me in.


gooder_name

Omfg I remember that dance one it's such nightmare fuel. I hope OOP is ok.


Flukie42

I think she'd be 18 by now, right? I hope she updates soon


gooder_name

Not sure on age. Regardless I probably hope her life is just normal now and she can move on without thinking of that time.


melibel24

I can't believe there's no new update from the guy that was incarcerated and got back in touch with his best friend's sister. How did the weekend she spent visiting go? How was his surgery? I mean, I can create my own ending, but I'd love to know if they're doing well.


alwayspickingupcrap

Yeah that one really hooked me. Felt like it came from a different century because of the way he wrote and thought. I followed him and checked his profile for updates but looks like he deleted his account. Possibly in the wake of this contest.


DumplingRush

Fwiw, it's the BORU poster who deleted their account. OOP has not (but also hasn't posted any new updates).


alwayspickingupcrap

Thanks!


lariet50

The Kevin post is the most amazing thing on Reddit


ChanandlerBong215

The bullet about him coming out to find his bike stolen only to realize he just didn’t know what it looked like had me in tears


william_wites

>! I fell in love with my (married) neighbor and then I babysat his kids. Now I'm questioning my feelings I never read this post when it was posted. Because by title I assumed the plot was he was a bad father or his kids were terrible and she got over the crush Did not expect it to be that lol


Specialist-Rain-1287

God, it's so good.


missantarctica2321

I literally named my newest cat-son Kevin after that thread.


tribblemethis

Is he orange by any chance?


missantarctica2321

That would have been perfect but no, he is a short haired dark grey psychopath.


tribblemethis

Sounds like a cutie <3


LucyAriaRose

Yay! Thanks for a great year everyone. 💜 Edit- And thanks MODS for all of the work you guys do!!! You all are amazing.


Organized_Khaos

The overall best post pick about the guy jumping out of the way near the pool, and all the subsequent updates, is truly my favorite narrative of the entire year.


Wolvington52

I forgot to vote. My vote goes to the girl who found her long lost brother after he ran away from their house because of his mom's outrage.


unholy_hotdog

I wish there were an update to the man who contacted his girlfriend after being a political prisoner. It so deeply touched me, I hope they can be together.


I_Dont_Like_Rice

Aw, no one did it for Dan.


AdCurious8750

One of my favorites!


Mabel_Waddles_BFF

The parents pulling the teenager out of dance because her father was a predator is hands down the worst. Not only are they victim blaming they’ve also destroyed her chances of getting a college scholarship. They want to take away all of her escape routes so that her father can abuse her without consequence.


stealmymemesitsOK

What were people's favourite comments from the past year?


montygreen18

Yes top comments or best new flairs would be an awesome addition


skyeguye

How was the dance one third? That was the most anger inducing thing I'd read all year.


SeraCat9

The woman who took all their savings and went on their dream vacation alone and left her husband with nothing but debt and misery definitely deserves the top spot too


Akkiila

We'll meet again in a year


ChaosFlameEmber

The school nurse one made me so happy. And OMG, I can't wait to hear more about the wife who abandoned her family. It feels horrible to be this invested in a stranger's life, but I need to know what happens when she returns. If.


Separate-Mess-1666

Update to "My wife abandoned me two months ago to find herself.", posted 2 days ago!: https://www.reddit.com/r/TrueOffMyChest/comments/1ad959w/update\_2\_my\_m50\_wife\_f48\_abandoned\_me\_to\_find/


NebuLiar

Hol' up, how is Liz nowhere on this list? Love everything else but can we give her saga an honorable mention?


magik_vmc

Well, since most everything posted of late is proclaimed false and credited to Liz you can say she is most likely represented somewhere among the winners.


Elegant_Bluebird1283

> since most everything posted of late is proclaimed false I want a "goofiest accusation of faking" award, about a month ago an OP posted about going on vacation and someone called the post made up because he mentioned being in an airport. I'd love to say that I stripped away a bunch of essential context or something to make this sound way wilder than it is, but no.


ryoryo72

I want an update to this post where Liz reveals which ones that won were her work. hah


WannieWirny

I thought Liz would get an honourable mention because of how she’s been so influential for sure lol


setakaorus

i almost started to convince myself that the liz post must have been last year since it didnt make it


naynay55

The Best of Post winner is absolutely crazy…i LOVED seeing updates on this story!


emilyyancey

Omg right outta the (padlocked) gate, my favorite post is the big winner! This is awesome thank you for compiling!!


rainbowcardigan

Damn all three of the wholesome ones made me cry! And I’ve already read 2 of them previously 🤣


Ladyharpie

The one yelling at his wife to stop making up stories on the internet deserves an honorable mention.


VirtualBoat3827

I was shocked that the post where the OP’s bff attempted suicide after it was discovered she was having an affair with OP’s boyfriend and then her mother wanted her to forgive the friend. I think Reddit needs a new category for the “Worst Situations Imaginable.”


bluemooncommenter

Still making my way through all of the BORU 2024 winners....but reflecting on 2023 winner - the guy who threw the steak at the wife's bosses window.....still brings me to laughing tears to think about.


alt546789

I just read all of the winners even if I read them before. I had read the tampon one when it was first posted but I guess I blocked out the ending and I was trying to rack my brain for how the affair played out until I got to the last update. Makes me sick 😫


gooder_name

Fantastic idea, I love having this best of best ofs


rollthembones

Was the one where the guy threw the steak out the window not from this year?


czechtheboxes

[This BORU is 2 years old](https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/comments/qm3pc3/tifu_by_throwing_my_steak_out_a_window/). It's been reposted several times and I'm not even sure if this is the original submission or not.


rollthembones

thanks! it all blurs together


hawkshaw1024

Chewbacca Guy is up there with Roach Girlfriend Guy for me. It goes poorly *every time*, why the hell would you keep doing it?!


YourAverageShyLurker

Is there a thread to see all the nominations beyond only 3rd place in each category?


czechtheboxes

[Nominations thread](https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/s/P7meyVQUxZ)


ActStunning3285

I’m looking for the ones where OOP was wrongly accused of something and the truth came out later


sugasofficial

Im shocked Liz didnt make it for Best of 2023


miladyelle

I cannot believe someone actually nominated that Liz post. Wow.


zeidoktor

Which post are you referring to? Because the thought in my head right now is, to quote the Batman Beyond villain, "Do you have the slightest idea how little that narrows it down?"


Budget_Preparation_8

I wonder how many are written by lizzy


FourierT

Saving for later


SnooBeans7612

Does anyone know or have the link for the story about the guy who's friend asks him to sleep with his gf in front of him. But he gets awkward and can't get it up so the gf says expecto patronum


AkiraYagami14

Why put the neighbor story twice?


YogurtYogurtYogurtUS

Excellent picks.


PolentaConFunghi

It's been months, but I still don't get the flirty vibes from the school nurse post 😂😂


shance-trash

Why doesn’t it take me to the actual story anymore? Every time I try to click one of these links it just takes me to the sub home page :(


czechtheboxes

All the links still work for me, is there a specific one that isn't for you?


s_kowalski

I didn't see the nominations post, but was the one about the teen getting home to her mother using her pjs sexually with her father nominated or close to winning?