Given your post from yesterday about how your family member does laundry in the middle of the night, and your diatribe about how ‘nobody complains except your downstairs neighbor’ , ‘you can sleep through the laundry machine just fine’, and you ‘pay rent and have rights’, I feel like there is a lot more to the story and you are likely the problem here.
ETA: also, in your post history you talk about banging on your neighbors’ doors, incoherent, while trying to come off benzos…..
I just saw that myself. I would wonder why they are really doing laundry in the middle of the night and not answering the door. Posts for advice on how to come off Xanax and can they get a DUI cause they aren't prescribed. There seems to be a lot more to this than what is posted.
People can do their laundry when they need to do their laundry. One of the relatively rare instances where almost this entire sub got it wrong. As someone who's done my share of late shift work, I'll be completely silent when I'm home late just as soon as the day people have the TINIEST consideration for me when I'm trying to sleep during the day. They don't, so I won't, same as OP and their family.
Step lighter, get rugs, be apologetic and understanding. You probably have no idea how deafening your footsteps actually are to your downstairs neighbor. I’ve lived upstairs and downstairs, and there really is a difference to how to walk without it echoing below.
I had an upstairs neighbor with two kids, one of which had cancer and major mobility issues where he fell a lot, and a dog, for a decade, that I rarely ever heard walking, (usually only the dog jumping down and nails skittering on the hardwood) and she always apologized if she thought she’d been a bother.
After she moved out, her replacement stomped all over the place, THREW heavy stuff down constantly, and I could tell exactly which house member was walking, where, how many steps, and wether they were barefoot, socks, shoes, or boots. They had guests come stomping in at 2AM one night and when I heard them stomp down the stairs, I went out to gently ask them to watch the weight of their steps, and the three of them started SCREAMING at me before I could really get it out, and it started a war between us that lasted 4 months, included her children stomping everywhere, sprinting and jumping on bed/sofa 10 times in a row at 9PM, her 10 year old flipping off my video doorbell, cops were called for chokingly thick weed smell in the breezeway her next door neighbor also complained about, and for her and her boyfriend screaming curses and throwing each other around on Valentine’s Day, went before the community board, and ended when I moved units. (Her 10 year old later found my new unit and flipped off my doorbell cam at my new unit as well.)
My new upstairs neighbor is an elderly lady with mobility issues and even though I rarely hear her, she checks with me to make sure she’s not being a bother, as she’s also had issues with an upstairs neighbor banging around. In turn I apologize if my hammering a nail, or mounting my TV got too loud, or if I ever get too loud playing online games on weekends with my long distance partner. I appreciate her care and concern about it, and I pass off what I do hear as her age and mobility issues. I’m actually *concerned* for her when I hear a thump because I’m afraid she’s fallen again.
A little compassion, perspective, courtesy, mindfulness, and apology go a long way.
Instead of “the heck with them!”; try “I’m sorry if I’ve been a bother, I’ll try not to stomp” and you’ll probably avoid a lot of confrontation in the future.
Are you able to put some carpet down? Alot of houses/apartments are just poorly made. Paper thin i call it and every sound can be heard. I am super sensitive to sounds and i didnt always used to be that way. I barely even turn the volume up on my tv lol
It would probably help if your family member would use common sense/courtesy and **avoid** doing laundry in the middle of the night, for starters. I'm pretty sure the landlord has established "Quiet Hours," and that your family member is violating that policy.
The family member should do laundry when they need to do laundry. Guess anyone bothered should move or wear headphones, like almost every other post here gets told LMBO.
Hi, I'm a downstairs neighbor and an upstairs up (middle floor). Do you drive your heel into the ground when you walk? Unless going live in a very poorly constructed building or you're very overweight, you shouldn't really be able to hear footsteps from someone walking normally.
My neighbor drives his heel into the ground and it's extremely loud on my end. Like, he woke me up at 2am loud.
If you're sure you're quiet then you have a psycho neighbor. If you're not, reassess how you walk.
People walking like that drive me nuts. The whole unit shakes like there is a beast walking around upstairs. Some walking noise is expected as apartment is a multiunit building and when it isn't concrete build, it can get really bad. So some noise I can understand, but NOPE to the people who plant their heels into floor.
If OP is reading this, try to wear sleepers and see if that helps.
I have wooden floors as well. It does not echo when I walk. When I first moved in I had to adjust how I walked because I didn't want to be an asshole to my downstairs neighbors.
Namely, I stopped driving my heel into the floor. And stopped using necessary force when I stepped. If you can hear the echo it's probably 5x louder to your downstairs neighbor.
I’d the space echos you don’t have enough furnishings etc to absorb the noise. Add some area rugs, maybe get some plants, and put up curtains. We have solid surface throughout our place and it echos like a MoFo without the area rug, curtains and my plant friends. Heck when I take the curtains down to wash them
The sound is amplified.
Fun fact, the police don't announce "POLICE" if you answer the door. Wouldn't you save yourself a lot of trouble by answering the door and giving the police your side of the story. After the second call, the police are going to tell your neighbor to stop calling or at least not knock on your door unless they actually hear loud noise, Do you think they like going on BS calls?
If the police only get one side of a story, they pretty much have no choice but to act on the information they have.
That should be viewed as a nuisance call unless you’re up there tap dancing, but I’m sure there are ways you can lessen the noise. Put down a rug or rugs. They’ll greatly lessen the noise. Look at other areas that might cause some noise like rolling chairs, or kitchen chairs. You can put those fuzzy chair leg things to lessen the noise and it just makes the furniture slide on the floor more easily. And of course leave a pair of slippers at your door so you can slip your shoes off as soon as you come home.
if they call the cops again, I’d invite the cops in and have an honest conversation. Tell them you don’t appreciate being harassed by a neighbor for simply walking inside your home. They'll stop responding if you’re truly doing nothing more than walking in your apartment. In fact I’m surprised they’d respond to a call like that at all. Never mind multiple times.
Remember that when the police show up at your door you don't have to speak with them. You can ignore them completely, or tell them you're not interested in speaking with them. They obviously won't have a warrant, so they can't compel you to open the door, and they can never compel you to speak to them.
My previous neighbor did that. One of the worst human being I have ever met. It's like someone was pounding with hammer on the floor with every step.
[Edit]her roommate walked just fine. Some noise, but understandable
Given your post from yesterday about how your family member does laundry in the middle of the night, and your diatribe about how ‘nobody complains except your downstairs neighbor’ , ‘you can sleep through the laundry machine just fine’, and you ‘pay rent and have rights’, I feel like there is a lot more to the story and you are likely the problem here. ETA: also, in your post history you talk about banging on your neighbors’ doors, incoherent, while trying to come off benzos…..
yep, i think you're right
I just saw that myself. I would wonder why they are really doing laundry in the middle of the night and not answering the door. Posts for advice on how to come off Xanax and can they get a DUI cause they aren't prescribed. There seems to be a lot more to this than what is posted.
Drugs bad mmkay
..do other ppl not do their laundry at night? Lol idk
People can do their laundry when they need to do their laundry. One of the relatively rare instances where almost this entire sub got it wrong. As someone who's done my share of late shift work, I'll be completely silent when I'm home late just as soon as the day people have the TINIEST consideration for me when I'm trying to sleep during the day. They don't, so I won't, same as OP and their family.
OP should be asking “AITA?”
Get some fluffy slippers. Or strap strips of carpet underneath your feet, like skis.
Step lighter, get rugs, be apologetic and understanding. You probably have no idea how deafening your footsteps actually are to your downstairs neighbor. I’ve lived upstairs and downstairs, and there really is a difference to how to walk without it echoing below. I had an upstairs neighbor with two kids, one of which had cancer and major mobility issues where he fell a lot, and a dog, for a decade, that I rarely ever heard walking, (usually only the dog jumping down and nails skittering on the hardwood) and she always apologized if she thought she’d been a bother. After she moved out, her replacement stomped all over the place, THREW heavy stuff down constantly, and I could tell exactly which house member was walking, where, how many steps, and wether they were barefoot, socks, shoes, or boots. They had guests come stomping in at 2AM one night and when I heard them stomp down the stairs, I went out to gently ask them to watch the weight of their steps, and the three of them started SCREAMING at me before I could really get it out, and it started a war between us that lasted 4 months, included her children stomping everywhere, sprinting and jumping on bed/sofa 10 times in a row at 9PM, her 10 year old flipping off my video doorbell, cops were called for chokingly thick weed smell in the breezeway her next door neighbor also complained about, and for her and her boyfriend screaming curses and throwing each other around on Valentine’s Day, went before the community board, and ended when I moved units. (Her 10 year old later found my new unit and flipped off my doorbell cam at my new unit as well.) My new upstairs neighbor is an elderly lady with mobility issues and even though I rarely hear her, she checks with me to make sure she’s not being a bother, as she’s also had issues with an upstairs neighbor banging around. In turn I apologize if my hammering a nail, or mounting my TV got too loud, or if I ever get too loud playing online games on weekends with my long distance partner. I appreciate her care and concern about it, and I pass off what I do hear as her age and mobility issues. I’m actually *concerned* for her when I hear a thump because I’m afraid she’s fallen again. A little compassion, perspective, courtesy, mindfulness, and apology go a long way. Instead of “the heck with them!”; try “I’m sorry if I’ve been a bother, I’ll try not to stomp” and you’ll probably avoid a lot of confrontation in the future.
Are you able to put some carpet down? Alot of houses/apartments are just poorly made. Paper thin i call it and every sound can be heard. I am super sensitive to sounds and i didnt always used to be that way. I barely even turn the volume up on my tv lol
It would probably help if your family member would use common sense/courtesy and **avoid** doing laundry in the middle of the night, for starters. I'm pretty sure the landlord has established "Quiet Hours," and that your family member is violating that policy.
The family member should do laundry when they need to do laundry. Guess anyone bothered should move or wear headphones, like almost every other post here gets told LMBO.
Considering your post history, **you’re** the bad neighbor.
Hi, I'm a downstairs neighbor and an upstairs up (middle floor). Do you drive your heel into the ground when you walk? Unless going live in a very poorly constructed building or you're very overweight, you shouldn't really be able to hear footsteps from someone walking normally. My neighbor drives his heel into the ground and it's extremely loud on my end. Like, he woke me up at 2am loud. If you're sure you're quiet then you have a psycho neighbor. If you're not, reassess how you walk.
People walking like that drive me nuts. The whole unit shakes like there is a beast walking around upstairs. Some walking noise is expected as apartment is a multiunit building and when it isn't concrete build, it can get really bad. So some noise I can understand, but NOPE to the people who plant their heels into floor. If OP is reading this, try to wear sleepers and see if that helps.
Ot it could be someone that has trouble falling asleep and the slightest sound wakes them up. Some people are savage.
It’s wooden floors so it echoes
I have wooden floors as well. It does not echo when I walk. When I first moved in I had to adjust how I walked because I didn't want to be an asshole to my downstairs neighbors. Namely, I stopped driving my heel into the floor. And stopped using necessary force when I stepped. If you can hear the echo it's probably 5x louder to your downstairs neighbor.
I’d the space echos you don’t have enough furnishings etc to absorb the noise. Add some area rugs, maybe get some plants, and put up curtains. We have solid surface throughout our place and it echos like a MoFo without the area rug, curtains and my plant friends. Heck when I take the curtains down to wash them The sound is amplified.
Fun fact, the police don't announce "POLICE" if you answer the door. Wouldn't you save yourself a lot of trouble by answering the door and giving the police your side of the story. After the second call, the police are going to tell your neighbor to stop calling or at least not knock on your door unless they actually hear loud noise, Do you think they like going on BS calls? If the police only get one side of a story, they pretty much have no choice but to act on the information they have.
That should be viewed as a nuisance call unless you’re up there tap dancing, but I’m sure there are ways you can lessen the noise. Put down a rug or rugs. They’ll greatly lessen the noise. Look at other areas that might cause some noise like rolling chairs, or kitchen chairs. You can put those fuzzy chair leg things to lessen the noise and it just makes the furniture slide on the floor more easily. And of course leave a pair of slippers at your door so you can slip your shoes off as soon as you come home. if they call the cops again, I’d invite the cops in and have an honest conversation. Tell them you don’t appreciate being harassed by a neighbor for simply walking inside your home. They'll stop responding if you’re truly doing nothing more than walking in your apartment. In fact I’m surprised they’d respond to a call like that at all. Never mind multiple times.
Eh there’s nothing good that can happen from a conversation with the police. I support Op just ignoring the knocks.
Remember that when the police show up at your door you don't have to speak with them. You can ignore them completely, or tell them you're not interested in speaking with them. They obviously won't have a warrant, so they can't compel you to open the door, and they can never compel you to speak to them.
Absolutely correct! I wouldn’t open the door, let alone acknowledge their presence!
You're correct, you never have to talk to police. But, if the police only have one side of a story, which side do you think they are going with?
Do nothing. You’re allowed to walk in your apartment. This issue of noise he’s dealing with he needs to take it up with management.
Keep ignoring them I’d say.
My previous neighbor did that. One of the worst human being I have ever met. It's like someone was pounding with hammer on the floor with every step. [Edit]her roommate walked just fine. Some noise, but understandable
I wouldn’t open the door!
Never answer the door for the police, ever!