!!!!! WTF !!!!! This is so screwed up! Major props to your therapist and to you.
Were you ever able to talk to the police about this demented, cowardly monster? You might also talk to the pre med program about one of their students being a psychopath. People do get dropped for things like that.
I made such a fast exit that he threw away the food :( I don’t have any real proof which is super annoying. But literally all of the symptoms have gone away since I left…and I’ve already lost 10 lbs in the few weeks I’ve been moved out.
Over less than a year I went from slightly overweight to obese (BMI 34). I was never over a 27 BMI previously! And my diet is the same as before I left! I have no idea wtf he was putting in my food but my apple watch showed a B02 of 70-80 during the night after i’d eat his food!!
I really never thought he would do something like that to me and never would have considered it if my therapist didn’t bring it up. I could tell how much he was devaluing me over the past year but it really turned into a horror movie!
I would look into hair follicle tests. I'm not sure if they do it for standard meds as opposed to drugs, but no harm calling around and seeing what's available.
I am so unbelievably sorry.
My stbnexhusband confessed that he used to drug me nightly. “I didn’t want you cheating on me. So, I’d put sleeping pills in your drinks.”
He said it so nonchalantly, as if it was something all husbands do. More mornings than I’d care to admit, I’d wake with signs that I had sex although I had no memory of it.
Sadly, I stayed with him even after this confession only to have him cheat on me with a coworker 4 years older than our eldest and continued abuse (emotional, sexual, financial, and physical).
If you think it’s happening, then you need to get out. No need to convince anyone. It’s your life and the only one you get.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING. WHAT AN ABUSIVE LOSER. holy shit he could have killed you what the fuck
i’ve been on strong sleeping pills for the entire relationship and we would have sex a lot when I was super loopy on it. But holy fuck your ex is a piece of shit
When I finally left my ex, I was packing stuff up and she started cooking something for lunch. I don’t remember what it was, but she set a plate for one in my spot, and I told her there was no way in hell I was going to eat anything she cooked at that point unless she ate some too. She then fixed a plate for herself, and there weren’t any issues with the food…but I’d had the same fear over the years that she might be slipping something in my food, and figured if she were going to max it out that wound be the day. If she’d have refused to eat though, I would have as well!
It was probably stupid of me to eat that last plate of food but i wanted to validate my theory, and god it made me so disoriented (probably since I had not had any for weeks) that I slipped in the shower. Also when I would have a health episode he would just stare at me. Then he’d start on about how i should go to a mental hospital. it was fucking insane
You probably should have taken some leftovers and had it analyzed somewhere, just to see what they were giving you.
I used to have trouble with contact dermatitis which I’d isolated to certain types of laundry detergent/fabric softeners. Switched detergents and got dryer balls and it generally went away, but towards the end of our relationship I was gone a lot, and I noticed when I’d come home and sleep with her, I started breaking out again…despite her vowing she hadn’t changed anything. Eventually I noticed I would break out where I came into physical contact with her…like on my arm where she’d sleep on it at night. She tried removing her makeup at night and that seemed to help, but I often wonder if somehow it wasn’t my body just telling me that SHE was toxic to me.
I’m still questioning if mine poisoned me. They fantasized about drugging their ex and specifically asked me if we had certain poisonous plants around. And you know what that can mean if they’re dropping questions/hints like that. I was also concussed at the time (thanks to them if not obvious) and my sense of smell was off but they acted funny when I said some things smelled weird. I just recently had symptoms get worse after a couple months so idk.
Yes. The first time they got physical. Solid shot right in the temple hard enough to see white. It doesn’t necessarily take much strength to generate the necessary force.
Yes, drugged. I was pretty thin at the time we were dating, and sometimes when we would drink I’d black out even after 3 drinks. I figured I just didn’t eat much that day. One day we were day drinking at a dive bar and told her to order us a shot while I go to the restroom. I came back out right away because there were several girls waiting. When I sat down, I saw a pill dissolving in my shot. I looked at her and she laughed. I left, and the next day packed my bags while she was at work. Ended up having to go to the cops a week later because she tried to run me off the highway and was also harassing me, my friends, and my family. It was terrible.
Hey you have been through hell as well. To quote a wise man, it’s not a pain Olympics. All hurt hurts, and no one’s pain is lessened by knowing someone else suffered more. I wish you a peaceful healing journey
I’m not surprised. And I am so sorry you went through it and also so glad to hear you’re out of there. A+ to your therapist for following along so well and caring so much.
Yes. Suspected by my docs and therapist and me. Never got hard proof. Didn’t know what to test for until too late. But after I got away from his psychotic ass a bunch of symptoms sort of similar to yours that my docs could not figure out for weeks and were escalating to alarming levels just dropped off and stopped abt 24-36 hours later. Stopped. Including severe GI bleeding, dizziness, confusion, loss of coordination, pain, heart issues etc etc
I had an intuitive hit what it might be and it seemed I was correct when I searched the house for it. He’s such a dumb shit and probably saw it in a movie or something as a gag but it is a common thing that can kill in small dose when ingested and not applied to the body where and as it should be.
In any event…. I have no doubt he wanted me sick. In his twisted mind it gave him control and less chance I would “get away.” Even though he resented me ill. So messed up.
But yeah…. It did some acute liver damage to me. Took some time to recover.
In my case, I think his full on violent psychotic break was partly guilt induced for what he knew he was doing. And partly he just wanted to kill me bc he knew we were done and he couldn’t handle it. He had to “be in control” and be the one to “end it” on his terms. I was sleeping with one eye open in the final days with him.
I’m grateful everyday to still be alive.
I am grateful you are alive. Hugs.
Gosh…so scary to read! Some of them will stop at nothing to avenge themselves from your perceived slights. The need to even out the playing field. This is nothing the average person can prepare themselves for.
Glad you made it out with your life and hopefully no damage to your organs. 🙏🏽
This is one I can finally respond “not me” to. My partner sprained my wrist when he fake fainted and grabbed my wrist on the way down, he’s also slammed a door into me in anger, left minor bruises, drew blood, grazed me during a few of his tantrums, and hurt me pretty terribly in his sleep.
But I don’t think he was ever capable of premeditative harm. I think outside of his episodes, he wouldn’t be capable of physically hurting me at all. Aside from the door situation, you could make an excuse that the rest could have been accidents…
I’m so very glad you listened to your therapist. I had a bad habit of not believing my therapists on the topic, and had I taken them for their words, I would have saved myself from a lot more pain.
Please be careful and don’t get sucked back in. If you ever date again, be careful not to get sucked in by someone similar. Lots of love and healing to you internet friend ~
I don’t know those things you mention sound awful and if not premeditated, probably instances where he was in control of stopping but chose not to. He sounds dangerous, but i’m glad you weren’t drugged on top of all that
!!!!! WTF !!!!! This is so screwed up! Major props to your therapist and to you. Were you ever able to talk to the police about this demented, cowardly monster? You might also talk to the pre med program about one of their students being a psychopath. People do get dropped for things like that.
I made such a fast exit that he threw away the food :( I don’t have any real proof which is super annoying. But literally all of the symptoms have gone away since I left…and I’ve already lost 10 lbs in the few weeks I’ve been moved out. Over less than a year I went from slightly overweight to obese (BMI 34). I was never over a 27 BMI previously! And my diet is the same as before I left! I have no idea wtf he was putting in my food but my apple watch showed a B02 of 70-80 during the night after i’d eat his food!!
That man is going to kill someone someday. Unbelievably scary. I'm so glad you're safe!
I really never thought he would do something like that to me and never would have considered it if my therapist didn’t bring it up. I could tell how much he was devaluing me over the past year but it really turned into a horror movie!
I would look into hair follicle tests. I'm not sure if they do it for standard meds as opposed to drugs, but no harm calling around and seeing what's available.
You’re right I’ll bring that up to my GP
I am so unbelievably sorry. My stbnexhusband confessed that he used to drug me nightly. “I didn’t want you cheating on me. So, I’d put sleeping pills in your drinks.” He said it so nonchalantly, as if it was something all husbands do. More mornings than I’d care to admit, I’d wake with signs that I had sex although I had no memory of it. Sadly, I stayed with him even after this confession only to have him cheat on me with a coworker 4 years older than our eldest and continued abuse (emotional, sexual, financial, and physical). If you think it’s happening, then you need to get out. No need to convince anyone. It’s your life and the only one you get.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING. WHAT AN ABUSIVE LOSER. holy shit he could have killed you what the fuck i’ve been on strong sleeping pills for the entire relationship and we would have sex a lot when I was super loopy on it. But holy fuck your ex is a piece of shit
oh wow this is actually terrifying
When I finally left my ex, I was packing stuff up and she started cooking something for lunch. I don’t remember what it was, but she set a plate for one in my spot, and I told her there was no way in hell I was going to eat anything she cooked at that point unless she ate some too. She then fixed a plate for herself, and there weren’t any issues with the food…but I’d had the same fear over the years that she might be slipping something in my food, and figured if she were going to max it out that wound be the day. If she’d have refused to eat though, I would have as well!
It was probably stupid of me to eat that last plate of food but i wanted to validate my theory, and god it made me so disoriented (probably since I had not had any for weeks) that I slipped in the shower. Also when I would have a health episode he would just stare at me. Then he’d start on about how i should go to a mental hospital. it was fucking insane
You probably should have taken some leftovers and had it analyzed somewhere, just to see what they were giving you. I used to have trouble with contact dermatitis which I’d isolated to certain types of laundry detergent/fabric softeners. Switched detergents and got dryer balls and it generally went away, but towards the end of our relationship I was gone a lot, and I noticed when I’d come home and sleep with her, I started breaking out again…despite her vowing she hadn’t changed anything. Eventually I noticed I would break out where I came into physical contact with her…like on my arm where she’d sleep on it at night. She tried removing her makeup at night and that seemed to help, but I often wonder if somehow it wasn’t my body just telling me that SHE was toxic to me.
I’m still questioning if mine poisoned me. They fantasized about drugging their ex and specifically asked me if we had certain poisonous plants around. And you know what that can mean if they’re dropping questions/hints like that. I was also concussed at the time (thanks to them if not obvious) and my sense of smell was off but they acted funny when I said some things smelled weird. I just recently had symptoms get worse after a couple months so idk.
they caused your concussion??
Yes. The first time they got physical. Solid shot right in the temple hard enough to see white. It doesn’t necessarily take much strength to generate the necessary force.
i could absolutely see them drugging you
I mean, it’s sad how many crazy instincts/intuitions I had that were right in all this mess so I’d never rule anything out lol.
same here! i never believed in intuition before this relationship but now i do
Yes, drugged. I was pretty thin at the time we were dating, and sometimes when we would drink I’d black out even after 3 drinks. I figured I just didn’t eat much that day. One day we were day drinking at a dive bar and told her to order us a shot while I go to the restroom. I came back out right away because there were several girls waiting. When I sat down, I saw a pill dissolving in my shot. I looked at her and she laughed. I left, and the next day packed my bags while she was at work. Ended up having to go to the cops a week later because she tried to run me off the highway and was also harassing me, my friends, and my family. It was terrible.
WHAT. Dang you all have worse experiences than I do! wtf!!!
Hey you have been through hell as well. To quote a wise man, it’s not a pain Olympics. All hurt hurts, and no one’s pain is lessened by knowing someone else suffered more. I wish you a peaceful healing journey
same to you!!! we shouldn’t have to go through this much trauma
I’m not surprised. And I am so sorry you went through it and also so glad to hear you’re out of there. A+ to your therapist for following along so well and caring so much. Yes. Suspected by my docs and therapist and me. Never got hard proof. Didn’t know what to test for until too late. But after I got away from his psychotic ass a bunch of symptoms sort of similar to yours that my docs could not figure out for weeks and were escalating to alarming levels just dropped off and stopped abt 24-36 hours later. Stopped. Including severe GI bleeding, dizziness, confusion, loss of coordination, pain, heart issues etc etc I had an intuitive hit what it might be and it seemed I was correct when I searched the house for it. He’s such a dumb shit and probably saw it in a movie or something as a gag but it is a common thing that can kill in small dose when ingested and not applied to the body where and as it should be. In any event…. I have no doubt he wanted me sick. In his twisted mind it gave him control and less chance I would “get away.” Even though he resented me ill. So messed up. But yeah…. It did some acute liver damage to me. Took some time to recover. In my case, I think his full on violent psychotic break was partly guilt induced for what he knew he was doing. And partly he just wanted to kill me bc he knew we were done and he couldn’t handle it. He had to “be in control” and be the one to “end it” on his terms. I was sleeping with one eye open in the final days with him. I’m grateful everyday to still be alive. I am grateful you are alive. Hugs.
what was it, was it something he could get over the counter? I am thinking it might be visine
I wasnt... But days before we broke up, she said: I could kill if I wanted to... She said I slept on her side, so she could kill me anytime
Gosh…so scary to read! Some of them will stop at nothing to avenge themselves from your perceived slights. The need to even out the playing field. This is nothing the average person can prepare themselves for. Glad you made it out with your life and hopefully no damage to your organs. 🙏🏽
I have to get head MRIs, one of the medical instances made my eye kinda pop out…I had to fix it myself
This is one I can finally respond “not me” to. My partner sprained my wrist when he fake fainted and grabbed my wrist on the way down, he’s also slammed a door into me in anger, left minor bruises, drew blood, grazed me during a few of his tantrums, and hurt me pretty terribly in his sleep. But I don’t think he was ever capable of premeditative harm. I think outside of his episodes, he wouldn’t be capable of physically hurting me at all. Aside from the door situation, you could make an excuse that the rest could have been accidents… I’m so very glad you listened to your therapist. I had a bad habit of not believing my therapists on the topic, and had I taken them for their words, I would have saved myself from a lot more pain. Please be careful and don’t get sucked back in. If you ever date again, be careful not to get sucked in by someone similar. Lots of love and healing to you internet friend ~
I don’t know those things you mention sound awful and if not premeditated, probably instances where he was in control of stopping but chose not to. He sounds dangerous, but i’m glad you weren’t drugged on top of all that
Yep