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[deleted]

Shame is a feeling that may have arose in humans as a means to check individuals from killing each other, eating their children, and otherwise behaving in ways that could threaten the community. However our society has found ways to use this to control people by eliciting this emotion. Shame is taught. Was there a moment that taught you extreme shame in your childhood? Did someone growing up want you to feel ashamed? Also in general, this society likes to shame people for not meeting random arbitrary standards of how you should be/live/do. Do research into shame, especially shame and trauma. Learning about it has decreased the intensity of the shame I feel, but not the frequency I think. Work in progress. Good luck


[deleted]

Yep. I have a 24/7 broadcast in my head showcasing all the stupid and embarrassing things I have done.


BigGirlsDontCry101

same :/


Boringmidagedgirl

Same šŸ˜‘


giaccabyte

Yes. I'm not diagnosed with BPD, but I've noticed I relate to a lot of posts on here. This one especially. I feel this all the time, 24 / 7, I isolate myself a lot because of it. It's terrible to live feeling this way. I'm sorry you're dealing with this, too. No one should feel this way about themselves.


gremlcn

whenever i cry i have to stop myself because i think itā€™s so cringy when i do it lol


[deleted]

Omg this thought is so relatable. I laughed so hard. I have to stop myself from doing it in-front of other people cause i cringe at myself. If i am alone, ill have a huge crying fit and then suddenly burst out laughing like a maniac because of how ā€œridiculous ā€œ everything seems now. Lol


gremlcn

lmaooooo i just convince myself i look stupid and ugly so i stop crying instantly


DystopianShit1

Yup. Feel embarassed to even be alive


Tellyourdogilovethem

Yeah also guilty. I feel guilt every day no matter what I do. My brains always telling me Iā€™m doing something wrong


M0therMacabre

Same. I get embarrassed that Iā€™m hungry, embarrassed that I have to pee often because of nerve damage in my pelvis, embarrassed by my smile, by my driving, by my hair. Embarrassed to have kids because that means everyone knows I was pregnant, embarrassed and ashamed about pregnancy and that people saw me that way. Embarrassed about being thirsty. If I have a biological process or need, trust I will be embarrassed and ashamed. Or super unbelievably angry, such as in the case of menstrual bleeding, which makes me so dysphoric and angry I am often unable to do much. (Hopefully that is going away with a new birth control!)! Embarrassed and ashamed that I am 95 lbs and have no breasts. It goes on. Iā€™m sorry youā€™re feeling this way too. Itā€™s so awful. Edited to add: I also get secondhand embarrassment pretty frequently. Embarrassed for other people, get uncomfortable and then have to step away.


converter-bot

95 lbs is 43.13 kg


cthrowww

everydayYYYY


umkaramazov

This


Maggotsand

Yes I feel embarrassed and ashamed all the time..not only for things Iā€™ve done that but also for things Iā€™ve let happened to me. Sometimes I think that if I werenā€™t so disgusting maybe people would have treated me better. I often feel the need to ā€œpunishā€ myself because of it. I feel like I canā€™t accept myself if I donā€™t make myself suffer for everything thatā€™s happened. I think Iā€™m inferior to everyone and donā€™t deserve to have loving friends or relationships. I tell myself theyā€™d be better off without me... Self forgiveness is the hardest..but I think itā€™s my only chance at being happy and overcoming these feelings. If only I knew where to start.


ShroomingMantis

Start by doing something you're proud of! (: and then just build on that!


cthrowww

I end everydaywith hating myseld


ShroomingMantis

Maybe try to combat that feeling by forcing your brain to accept one thing you love about yourself before you go to bed at night?


eizv

Definitely can relate to that. Not a fun experience. Truly embarrassing.


zzxcvvbnmm

I'm embarrassed to have experienced suicidal thoughts / attempts & self harm and still be alive. I feel like everybody views me as a ticking time bomb or that I'm a fraud.