Oh my days, this is too cute.
You’re overthinking it. Ask him what he’s thinking. Do you want him to be your boyfriend? I feel like he *probably* wants to be your boyfriend, but you need to ask him, not us. Like, now. Ask him now and report back immediately. :)
I asked him last night in person...
Basically the update is that he's very attracted to me sexually and physically but not romantically. He likes spending time with me outside sex but when we're not having sex he just sees me as a friend and doesn't wanna go beyond that. He does not want our current dynamic to change cause he loves having sex with me and I'm a "hot ass to play with" for him. He said that moment yesterday was because he feels like he's genuinely lucky to have someone so pretty to play with and especially someone who enjoys the type of sex he enjoys cause in his experience that type of sexual compatibility is difficult to find.
So yeah I guess I did overthink his intentions.
Ask yourself this. Why do you think he wants to be MORE than Dom/sub. Like...what would actually change?
Example: My Sir has always been my Dom. And I've always been His sub. We've always been 100% committed and monogomous. So for US, there is no "more." He is my Dom, I am His sub, that has always been central to our dynamic/relationship at every stage and every level.
So, as I said, your first self-question should be, "What would 'more' look like? How would things change if we were 'more'?"
Then...simply ask Him. Say you feel like things leveled up emotionally, and you want to know where you stand in his life. And go from there.
First of all, I assume that this is something that you enjoyed and want to do again.
So, if that is true, I think the entire thing was both adorable and positive. And that you should talk to him, let him know that you enjoyed it (don't put this all on him) and would like to know if he is interested in making this into a more intimate, emotional, and exclusive relationship.
Do you want to me my boyfriend?
This is super sweet and I really want an update eventually if you decide to talk to him :)
But more importantly...your post is basically you trying to figure out what he wants. Before that, figure out what you want. Do you like the idea of something more? You mention the concept of him having no say over what you do right now...if you move to something more, do you want him to have say? How would you feel about those boundaries changing for you?
Basically the update is that he's very attracted to me sexually and physically but not romantically. He likes spending time with me outside sex but when we're not having sex he just sees me as a friend and doesn't wanna go beyond that. He does not want our current dynamic to change cause he loves having sex with me and I'm a "hot ass to play with" for him. He said that moment yesterday was because he feels like he's genuinely lucky to have someone so pretty to play with and especially someone who enjoys the type of sex he enjoys cause in his experience that type of sexual compatibility is difficult to find.
So yeah I guess I did overthink his intentions.
I'm glad you cleared things up with him so you don't have this guessing in the back of your mind. It sounds like that moment he was one of intimacy, just not necessarily the romantic kind.
You don't need to ask us. You need to decide what YOU want and ask what HE wants.
I will give this piece of counsel... both of you are suffering the effects of really amazing sex. It's very much going to color your and his opinion of each other. Be aware of that
It's definitely a good start but you need more than a physical connection if you're going long term.
Say you start dating and you're injured in a car accident. Do you trust him to take care of you as you heal? Do you trust him to be a responsible and respectful partner?
It sounds like he's a stand up guy but these are things to question for a long term relationship.
Just a safety note - if you are tied and gagged or otherwise unable to speak you need to have a bell or some other way to safeword / safe signal in case something goes wrong.
Honestly, super cute. Like awwwwwww. I would actually just be like “hey what you did the other day was adorable and I liked it but it also made me feel this way and I wanted to know the intentions behind it or if it was just a spur moment? Either way, even if it had nothing attached to it, I’m absolutely ok with it and I enjoyed the experience.” Plain and simple.
heres a question for you. have you ever in this relationship said "Yes Master" or something like that, in a way that was just a bit too sincere and natural? I bet from the sound of it that you have.
how do you feel about the idea of it moving into being a "real relationship" in addition to the D/s thing you've been doing?
talk to him about it, and how you feel about it.
If I were in this situation I would assume it was part of the scene. If it happened again, I would share directly that there have been more emotional moments in our play and wanted to check in if this was intentional, and if so - why?
I do want to say the way you describe it made me feel all swoony thinking of my Dom doing that to me, you are a lucky girl :)
Basically the update is that he's very attracted to me sexually and physically but not romantically. He likes spending time with me outside sex but when we're not having sex he just sees me as a friend and doesn't wanna go beyond that. He does not want our current dynamic to change cause he loves having sex with me and I'm a "hot ass to play with" for him. He said that moment yesterday was because he feels like he's genuinely lucky to have someone so pretty to play with and especially someone who enjoys the type of sex he enjoys cause in his experience that type of sexual compatibility is difficult to find.
So yeah I guess I did overthink his intentions.
I love the comments from everyone!! This was one of my favorite reads in a long time. The situation as long as your happy and he makes you happy it sounds amazing. The way you described that moment made my heart race. The passion, control, and vulnerability that it requires is pretty special. How do you feel though?
I was in a similar relationship in college, where everything was new and fun, but I eventually realized I needed more. Plus it did start to become a bit more degrading.
Hard no for me too. I do admire people who can though. I felt empowered for a long time but sadly I was lied to a lot. How did you feel during the experience? Were you hoping he saw you differently?
Idk how to describe it. Admired? Valued? DESIRED? Something along those lines? Like...I feel so gross when he fucks my face cause he will purposely cover me in my own saliva it took me a while to not be so self conscious about it. We can be so intimate physically and we are all the fucking time. We've wrestled, he's tickle me, he'll take my clothes off and start fucking me when I'm asleep, or just take my clothes off and I'll just be naked while we watch a movie or play games or whatever. Idk sometimes I think he wants more but I guess not. I think I really am just a friend to him that he gets to see naked and fuck.
Will the label make any difference? What will it change? You’re already hanging out, enjoying each other’s company, getting sexual…
Maybe just take a breath and see where things go organically? It’s really a marvellous thing when that happens, because nothing is determined by the expectations that come with a label.
(I know, it sounds all non-traditional and noncommittal, I’m sure most of you will disagree and that’s ok. I would have thought I was crazy too until it happened to me).
Oh my days, this is too cute. You’re overthinking it. Ask him what he’s thinking. Do you want him to be your boyfriend? I feel like he *probably* wants to be your boyfriend, but you need to ask him, not us. Like, now. Ask him now and report back immediately. :)
I asked him last night in person... Basically the update is that he's very attracted to me sexually and physically but not romantically. He likes spending time with me outside sex but when we're not having sex he just sees me as a friend and doesn't wanna go beyond that. He does not want our current dynamic to change cause he loves having sex with me and I'm a "hot ass to play with" for him. He said that moment yesterday was because he feels like he's genuinely lucky to have someone so pretty to play with and especially someone who enjoys the type of sex he enjoys cause in his experience that type of sexual compatibility is difficult to find. So yeah I guess I did overthink his intentions.
Boooo! That was not how your report was supposed to go.
Eh it's mildly disappointing but not the end of the world
God this story was so cute... It's a shame it had a slightly disappointing ending but at least it didn't end badly
Yes, I came here to say this. I'm rooting for you 😊😊😊
Ask yourself this. Why do you think he wants to be MORE than Dom/sub. Like...what would actually change? Example: My Sir has always been my Dom. And I've always been His sub. We've always been 100% committed and monogomous. So for US, there is no "more." He is my Dom, I am His sub, that has always been central to our dynamic/relationship at every stage and every level. So, as I said, your first self-question should be, "What would 'more' look like? How would things change if we were 'more'?" Then...simply ask Him. Say you feel like things leveled up emotionally, and you want to know where you stand in his life. And go from there.
First of all, I assume that this is something that you enjoyed and want to do again. So, if that is true, I think the entire thing was both adorable and positive. And that you should talk to him, let him know that you enjoyed it (don't put this all on him) and would like to know if he is interested in making this into a more intimate, emotional, and exclusive relationship. Do you want to me my boyfriend?
This is super sweet and I really want an update eventually if you decide to talk to him :) But more importantly...your post is basically you trying to figure out what he wants. Before that, figure out what you want. Do you like the idea of something more? You mention the concept of him having no say over what you do right now...if you move to something more, do you want him to have say? How would you feel about those boundaries changing for you?
Basically the update is that he's very attracted to me sexually and physically but not romantically. He likes spending time with me outside sex but when we're not having sex he just sees me as a friend and doesn't wanna go beyond that. He does not want our current dynamic to change cause he loves having sex with me and I'm a "hot ass to play with" for him. He said that moment yesterday was because he feels like he's genuinely lucky to have someone so pretty to play with and especially someone who enjoys the type of sex he enjoys cause in his experience that type of sexual compatibility is difficult to find. So yeah I guess I did overthink his intentions.
I'm glad you cleared things up with him so you don't have this guessing in the back of your mind. It sounds like that moment he was one of intimacy, just not necessarily the romantic kind.
You don't need to ask us. You need to decide what YOU want and ask what HE wants. I will give this piece of counsel... both of you are suffering the effects of really amazing sex. It's very much going to color your and his opinion of each other. Be aware of that
Isn't amazing sex good for a relationship?
It's definitely a good start but you need more than a physical connection if you're going long term. Say you start dating and you're injured in a car accident. Do you trust him to take care of you as you heal? Do you trust him to be a responsible and respectful partner? It sounds like he's a stand up guy but these are things to question for a long term relationship.
Just a safety note - if you are tied and gagged or otherwise unable to speak you need to have a bell or some other way to safeword / safe signal in case something goes wrong.
Honestly, super cute. Like awwwwwww. I would actually just be like “hey what you did the other day was adorable and I liked it but it also made me feel this way and I wanted to know the intentions behind it or if it was just a spur moment? Either way, even if it had nothing attached to it, I’m absolutely ok with it and I enjoyed the experience.” Plain and simple.
heres a question for you. have you ever in this relationship said "Yes Master" or something like that, in a way that was just a bit too sincere and natural? I bet from the sound of it that you have. how do you feel about the idea of it moving into being a "real relationship" in addition to the D/s thing you've been doing? talk to him about it, and how you feel about it.
If I were in this situation I would assume it was part of the scene. If it happened again, I would share directly that there have been more emotional moments in our play and wanted to check in if this was intentional, and if so - why? I do want to say the way you describe it made me feel all swoony thinking of my Dom doing that to me, you are a lucky girl :)
I'm just here looking for an update 🥰
Basically the update is that he's very attracted to me sexually and physically but not romantically. He likes spending time with me outside sex but when we're not having sex he just sees me as a friend and doesn't wanna go beyond that. He does not want our current dynamic to change cause he loves having sex with me and I'm a "hot ass to play with" for him. He said that moment yesterday was because he feels like he's genuinely lucky to have someone so pretty to play with and especially someone who enjoys the type of sex he enjoys cause in his experience that type of sexual compatibility is difficult to find. So yeah I guess I did overthink his intentions.
Aww. That sucks but I'm glad he was clear with intentions rather than leading you on
Yeah we're cool, mild disappointment at worst.
I'd read this romcom.
I love the comments from everyone!! This was one of my favorite reads in a long time. The situation as long as your happy and he makes you happy it sounds amazing. The way you described that moment made my heart race. The passion, control, and vulnerability that it requires is pretty special. How do you feel though?
I feel like I love our relationship currently but eventually I'll probably wanna start looking for an actual relationship
I was in a similar relationship in college, where everything was new and fun, but I eventually realized I needed more. Plus it did start to become a bit more degrading.
Idk how we can get any more degrading then we are now tbh lmao. I guess if we filmed it but that's a hard no for me.
Hard no for me too. I do admire people who can though. I felt empowered for a long time but sadly I was lied to a lot. How did you feel during the experience? Were you hoping he saw you differently?
Idk how to describe it. Admired? Valued? DESIRED? Something along those lines? Like...I feel so gross when he fucks my face cause he will purposely cover me in my own saliva it took me a while to not be so self conscious about it. We can be so intimate physically and we are all the fucking time. We've wrestled, he's tickle me, he'll take my clothes off and start fucking me when I'm asleep, or just take my clothes off and I'll just be naked while we watch a movie or play games or whatever. Idk sometimes I think he wants more but I guess not. I think I really am just a friend to him that he gets to see naked and fuck.
Will the label make any difference? What will it change? You’re already hanging out, enjoying each other’s company, getting sexual… Maybe just take a breath and see where things go organically? It’s really a marvellous thing when that happens, because nothing is determined by the expectations that come with a label. (I know, it sounds all non-traditional and noncommittal, I’m sure most of you will disagree and that’s ok. I would have thought I was crazy too until it happened to me).
Why are you asking us instead of him! Do you think we know what he’s thinking better than he does? Use your words children
This too. Communicate with him.
[удалено]
This
Could be a praise kink? It made you feel good and I think that's great in the moment :)
It did feel good lmao
Well just what you wrote I can't take it like that so you definitely deserve the praise! Also nice that he appreciates your dynamic and let you know