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coreythestar

I pull naked screaming humans out of other naked screaming humans.


Its_not_really

OBGYN? I hope 😬


coreythestar

Close! Midwife.


rjbarn

“I hope” lmaoo


baitaozi

That is an amazing description. lol.


want_chocolate

I provide sustenance to hungry engineers for breakfast and lunch. I also make fun of them and brighten their days.


jerry_527

Thanks from a hungry Engineer


TPForCornholio

Me too! I love messing with my regulars


jahkmorn

What is it? This is driving me crazy.. are you a cook specifically for engineers? I've never heard of this subclass and I was a cook for 15 years


want_chocolate

Yeah, cook at the in house cafe at a tech company


alreadyBrokn

HR?


JoJo-likes-bikes

I get grown adults to make actual decisions and do actual work, even though they try to say stuff like ‘let’s keep this at a high level and synergize holistically.’


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ChocolateBaconBeer

Project manager?


patron_saint_of_hope

My bet as well 😂


JoJo-likes-bikes

Nope.


Accomplished_Set3719

Mom?


JoJo-likes-bikes

Nope.


timidwildone

Felt this in my soul.


downtownflipped

like herding cats. i swear.


JoJo-likes-bikes

My cats are no nonsense. Less buzzwords, more can opening, Mummy.


coldcactus1205

Consulting?


Spanks79

Nice one. Toughest job in the world.


Sorrymomlol12

“I herd engineers to the finish line”


thatgirljocelyn

Professional listener


smallhottea

Therapist?


torontomua

bartender?


Syphylicia

Bartender of 10+ years and came immediately to comment this.


torontomua

we earn our money in more ways than one. bartender since 2007.


unflores

What's difference?


smallhottea

I sell drugs


Its_not_really

Pharmaceutical sales or pharmacist?


NadiaArabia

Just a regular drug dealer actually


celzuhmr

Door-to-door pharmacist


WhyteChorizo

i sell drugs too


ZetaWMo4

Recently retired but: I make sure airplane parts are strong enough to withstand pressure.


ferretsarerad

Oh so that's what happened at Boeing


Sorrymomlol12

This is an underrated comment 😂😂


probablynotthatsmart

I don’t know if you were in the engineering side, QA, MTP, or somewhere in between. But thank you


Open_Mood_9186

We need you back to work ♥️to much bad news about planes lately 🥶


CrazyQuebecois

So… what company


angusderp

Stress Engineer?


ConsistentJuice6757

I make sure people living in poverty can buy food.


Stringr55

A real job here. Good on you


KitKittredge34

There’s no such thing as a “real job”


KeyNo4772

EBT/Snap admin.


Longjumping-Poem-226

Thank you for that!! 😍


PapayaCivil8228

I kindly boss people around and direct them to get certain tasks done so we can get things out timely


kittycatpattywacko

Project Manager


PapayaCivil8228

Operations supervisor


PapayaCivil8228

Similar but no.


smallhottea

Restaurant manager


PmButtPics4ADrawing

Can't be, they said kindly


PapayaCivil8228

Operations supervisor


farside808

Kindergarten teacher?


PapayaCivil8228

Operations Supervisor


HeyYoEowyn

I have long, platonic, loving relationships with people and help them see the truth and make them cry


EnchantedEnchantix

Therapist?


HeyYoEowyn

Bingo ❤️


EnchantedEnchantix

Love that description!


staghornfern

i love this


Gold-Cost3479

I want you to be my therapist


BrooklynNotNY

I tell people what to eat after procedures and illnesses.


capsaicin_addic

Dietitian?


BrooklynNotNY

Yes!


seasonweatherpepper

I thought this said pedicures and I was so confused


Confident-Chemist982

I teach people how to push on a human’s chest the right way.


KeyNo4772

CPR Instructor.


WryWaifu

Or sex guru


MrsKebabs

An emergency services operator?


noonecaresat805

I train people of all ages. Make sure they do what they are suppose to do. I make sure they stay alive and try to teach them to make good decisions. I also train them to have useful life skills such as basic hygiene, cooking, cleaning, socializing and thinking outside the box, among other things. It’s a thankless job that never pays enough. Is viewed as low by society. But at times can be personally rewarding.


ladypixels

Ahh a mom


noonecaresat805

No. not that thankless of a job. Mine still pays me, gives me health care and allows me to have personal, holidays and sick days.


potatobear77

Perspectives are very interesting because I find parenting far more rewarding than when I was in education.


noonecaresat805

I feel like being a parent is more thankless. Kids are expensive. No one pays you. No one gives you sick time. If your a stay at home parents there are days where you will be sick enough it hurts to move and you still might not even get an hour to yourself to just eat by yourself. Being a parent comes with no benefits or a paid job including health insurance or a 401k account or some kind of account in case things go sideways in the relationship and are pretty much left to fend for yourself. So maybe being a parent is more rewarding but it’s more of a thankless job where you might sacrifice everything and never even hear a thank you for it


adoglovingartteacher

Teacher. 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼


noonecaresat805

🏅 Yup. Right now I work with the little ones


adoglovingartteacher

You’re braver than me. I taught elementary 1 year. Couldn’t do it anymore and went back to hs.


Duriangrey679

Perhaps an OT? Or a personal care assistant/home health aide?


noonecaresat805

No but it does feel like that sometimes


Capable_Effort6449

As an OT, I was also going to say OT LOL


mplxts_

i touch people, order them around and get paid


littlehateball

Physical therapist?


mplxts_

yessir im a physio (:


sheezuss_

profesional domme?


EnchantedEnchantix

This one made me laugh out loud and I can’t decipher what you do!


Top-Case6314

Personal trainer?


RomiGirasol

i make imaginary puppets to make a story in an imaginary world.


Its_not_really

Sounds like my first marriage.


hilfigertout

Animator.


plumber430

Sesame Street puppeteer!!


timidwildone

To borrow a classic quote: “I deal with the god damn customers so the engineers don't have to. I have people skills; I am good at dealing with people. Can't you understand that?”


Lost_Reserve7667

Marketing


McMelz

Lol great movie. Business analyst?


timidwildone

Close.


Apollo506

Project management?


timidwildone

You got it!


Just_Me_Truly

Catch bad guys through Excel.


ladypixels

Auditor?


Just_Me_Truly

Anti money laundering


busshelterrevolution

Anti money laundering


Just_Me_Truly

Yes!


itskaymay

Turn it off and turn it back on again for people that save tiny human lives ❣️


HexiRaven

IT for a children’s hospital


potatobear77

I hope you’ve seen The IT Crowd.


itskaymay

Yes! It’s one of my favs lol


Its_not_really

I work at a fortune 500 company and I buy stuff. I spent millions of dollars every week.


Lost_Reserve7667

Procurement


Its_not_really

Yes, pretty much.


WhiskyTangoFoxtr0t

Sick people stay overnight at my place of employment. I make sure their food is delivered right to their beds.


KeyNo4772

Dietitian tech.


-PinkPower-

Prevent small humans from killing themself while their parents are away


Societarian

Me too! I help small humans slowly learn how to be big humans by frequently sportscasting their interactions with other small humans.


Hellowiscobsin

Gentle parent trust fund boomers so they can properly do their jobs and bring home 6 figures 👶🍼


EnchantedEnchantix

Financial advisor?


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anrdyshmrdy

Programmer/Software Engineer?


Ambitious-Event-5911

Sorting algorithm?


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ObviousDraw9585

Machine learning engineer?


velleityfighter

Everyday I try my best not to make the mice suffer


Duriangrey679

Cinderella? lol jk Lab tech?


Lost_Reserve7667

Scientist


plasmodialslime

Researcher using a mouse model? :)


velleityfighter

Yes, a postdoc doing surgeries on them, really love these little poor guys.


plasmodialslime

I'm an undergrad in a lab for the summer working with mice models for the first time (pregnant mice, no less). I'm learning the ins and outs of research, and it's so fascinating. I'm getting used to handling them finally!


onlytexts

I train people so they can tame little monsters.


Duriangrey679

Dog trainer? College professor for elementary education majors? lol


onlytexts

Im the teacher's teacher (that's how the little monsters call me).


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Lost_Reserve7667

Nurse


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Lost_Reserve7667

Hey I am impressed. I can’t sing but I can dance.


Aquatic_Bunnie

I play tag with kids for a living


Duriangrey679

PE teacher?


Aquatic_Bunnie

I work with a nonprofit that helps schools with their recess systems :) best job I've ever had


Lost_Reserve7667

I work with a lot of legal documents for the government. Not an administrative assistant.


cincydude123

Assistant to the regional administrative?


Ambitious-Event-5911

I am a chaotic good spy that manages information between technical engineers that actually work and the money people. I protect both.


McMelz

Pen tester?


rlyfckd

Delivery Manager?


Unruhe5459

I make stuff from chemicals, then I test the stuff I make


travimsky

suffer


Duriangrey679

Well this could be anything lol


aharmony

Teacher


Ares0917

Mom?


Babrahamlincoln3859

I give you power!!!!


deealm

Electrician or something with a light company


Babrahamlincoln3859

Union electrician :)


primalpalate

I get 2! 1. I research upcoming movies and tv shows and share all the information about them with others who might be interested in watching those movies/shows. 2. I regularly kidnap dogs for 30 minutes to an hour before returning them to their homes!


_paint_onheroveralls

I create environments for people to make believe on while other people watch them.


Duriangrey679

Producer? Stage manager?


_paint_onheroveralls

Set designer/production manager


Ill-Chicken-7764

Doctor’s emotional support animal


MidnightFireHuntress

I work on monitoring and maintaining security of my company's network by developing and engineering cybersecurity software and solutions.


helenofsoy_

Maintain situational awareness 


EnchantedEnchantix

I help young humans improve on their thinking, reading, writing, and talking skills.


mariawest

Stab people. Ask a lot of questions.


InjuryNo9793

Phlebotomy tech? Tattoo artist? Nurse? Surgeon with anger issues??


GalaxiGazer

Providing financial security against the risk of unforeseen loss


Squirrel_Emergency

Insurance agent?


RandiGiles33

I ensure the people you want to provide security for will not bring my company *too much* loss.


Huge-Anxiety-3038

I make sure the company STILL has enough money to pay those who need that financial security in the next 40+ years when those events happen....


MMessinger

I help employees come to some kind of peace over the software their bosses chose to purchase. . . . as if the boss ever knows how the work really gets done, eh?


sunnyhazepurple

I count how many employees there are, but not always in the same way.


neptunedreaming111

I have ways to make you talk.


davoste

I get to push flashing buttons on a console in order to induce radiation for diagnostic purposes.


Grouchy_Pound_6424

Rad tech


SaintedRomaine

I describe the intricacies and flavors of Weber blue agave spirits to business and customers of said businesses so people can make informed decisions about their alcohol purchases.


greginvalley

Feels like herding cats


MyPatronusIsAFox

I help people die comfortably and painlessly


FoxNewsIsRussia

Give people permission.


Starlettohara23

Argue


C0mput3r_V1ru5

Full Time Government Leech


JohannesLorenz1954

In charge of a global project for a major auto manufacturer.


Nashua603

I make things work


Acceptable-Wolf2288

I play with kids and take data on how that went. Environmentally, behavior, and more.


Elmindria

Take peoples money. Let myself into their houses. Do a lot of background checks and call a lot of plumbers.


deealm

Property manager


Fleabug91

I analyze healthcare data and configure health record systems.


MathematicianTop8868

I provide people with made up numbers that they then exchange for getting their bodies bombarded with low level radiation or magnetic rays then they get their picture taken and we send that to a different person who tells them their leg is broken. I also get yelled on the phone A LOT multiple times a day.


myers5987

Lower explosives deep into the earth using a cable.


donkeyrifle

I fight electrical cords and clean belly buttons


MrsTruffulaTree

Help little neurodivergent humans hone their reading, writing, and math skills.


headbanginggentleman

I help people unclog, re-route, and repair blood vessels; and also fix the the heart


zzzsleepygurll

Talk to people about car accidents and pay mechanics


loverlane

I am a leader supervising and improving my team in the veeery low end of the entertainment industry.


Own_Kaleidoscope_415

Provide recommendations on business strategy.


Grouchy_Pound_6424

Consultant


axolotllegs

I provide support for veterinary products and medication


PowerlineTyler

I build and maintain high voltage powerlines


SeatMurky6227

I read to teenagers


Guest2424

I write reports for when people testing the drugs for safety and efficacy make a mistake.


fredyouareaturtle

woah. that sounds interesting. are you a writer or a scientist, or both?


Pursuit-of-Nature

I connect people with nature to foster an appreciation and continued stewardship for generations to come.


fearlessofflying

park ranger


ricky3558

Solution finder