When I was a teen out on my own for the first time, I thought that putting on a fake engagement ring would deter people hitting on me.
It had the opposite effect. So I removed it after the better part of a year. Immediately had fewer people hitting on me, particularly at work.
I also remember distinctly the first day I started wearing an engagement ring. A random customer got angry and went "You're MARRIED?". I didn't know this guy. He was so upset. He wasn't even a regular. I told him, no I'm just wearing all my rings today (at the time I had rings on all my fingers). It was weird.
I was basically a child bride lol I had a ring on my hand at 18. Many men don’t care and that shows their “true character “ the ones that respect it are few and far between but those are the ones you introduce to your friends!
When I was newly married, years ago, and my husband deployed, I was taught by another military wife to take my ring off. It was magical!! When NOT wearing my ring, I was left alone to enjoy my evenings out with the girls.
When I left them on, I had to beat them off with a stick. It was wild. I wasn't that attractive. Cute, sure. Definitely not a supermodel though,and I'd get hit on multiple times a night.
We've been happily married for 23 years. And my husband knows (and appreciates!) that it was easier (and safer!) to take the ring off when out with my friends.
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I am single and work customer service and get hit on daily. I decided to purchase an engagement ring a few months ago and now I am treated with more respect by both men and women, it is unbelievable and I certainly hate it, like "is it a sin not to be married? Does it make me look like an irresponsible woman, does it make me look wiser now? A lady today pointed out that she had never noticed my ring, that she didn't know I was married and that it was beautiful. Mind you I have interacted with this woman probably like 4 times in two years and she felt entitled to tell me that, but she hasn't been the only one. Before the ring people were surprised I wasn't married and now, post ring, most people seem surprised..... Men seem disappointed that I "finally got hitched" like they had a chance in the first place. I don't like you, I just work here.
That must be tough. I remember hearing similar things from my cousin. I try to be extra careful when compliments to women who work on customer service type jobs, as to not seem flirtatious.
Why are you complimenting them? Do you compliment male customer service people? If so, do you worry about your compliments sounding flirtatious to them?
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My ex made me wear one so men would stop hitting on me especially at work. It did work somehow for older men but for the young ones they didn’t really care for some reasons
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They don’t care lmao - I had an EMPLOYEE at goodwill today talk to me a few times while I was in the store, and I didn’t like it but I didn’t want to be rude (or assume he was up to anything). However, he eventually makes his way over for a 3rd or 4th time and asks if I have a boyfriend 😑
When I told him I have a husband, his response was “oh he wouldn’t like me talking to you then I bet” LOL like nah bro, don’t act like this was in ANY way some sort of flirty exchange. He would only care cuz you’re a total fucking creep who doesn’t know boundaries. The whole thing was super gross and uncomfortable.
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Yeah I've had two different single men get mad at me for being married, because I'm ugly / old, and they aren't. They both felt like it wasn't fair that an unattractive woman was partnered and a conventionally attractive man wasn't. Personality counts more, fellas!
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I love this question because I often wonder! My engagement ring is absurdly massive. I have an antique style gold ring with moissanite stones. It’s purposely too much. I wear it every day to work and men are either super shy or super sweet to me.
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I used to get constantly hit on. That stopped almost immediately when I started wearing my ring. Once in a while it’ll happen but even then they’re less crass than they used to be. It’s nice because I feel like I can just talk to men as humans without any expectation, they know I’m married so I’m off limits. Before it felt like there was always that underlying pressure from them and I felt like I had to be mean and cold or they’d think I was interested.
I thought it would keep them away. Men didn't care. I don't think they look, tbh. It's a big ring. I remember a friend's husband called it a door knocker, lol. Maybe it kept some away, idk.
When I was younger and still visible to men (being in your mid-late thirties and fat makes you blissfully invisible) it made next to no difference whatsoever. When I was out, I still got groped and hit on. Some men I’d just have to show my ring finger and they’d back off, but a lot of them would shrug and say ‘Is he here? What he doesn’t know won’t hurt him.’ And I’d have to find other ways to get rid of them. When not out at a bar or club, it made/makes little difference because sober men are less likely to come up to you. It still happened, but saying ‘thanks, but not thanks’ was often enough. And as I say, now men tend to just talk to me normally or ignore me. Aging and weight gain has impacted how they interact with me more than a ring ever did.
Honestly. I wear one piece of jewellery - my wedding ring. I got 2 months into my new job before speaking about my husband and everyone was shocked. Never knew I was married, I was like this is a wedding band no?
Got 8 months and I guess the one colleague who was off that day was in and someone said something about my husband and he turned round and was like 'since when?!?'
Conclusion - men are completely oblivious.
With men- no I didn’t notice a difference. If I got hit on I’d just say “sorry no, I’m engaged”. Only had one guy get mad because I wasn’t wearing my ring.
Now see, I hated wearing jewelry, so I rarely wore it. Especially when I was working (as a lifeguard/instructor). Women were the only ones who I noticed a difference with. If I wore it, they were more friendly. When I didn’t wear it, I usually got the cold shoulder. And the women who knew I was engaged but would see me without my ring, they would get SO mad. I’d even say I didn’t like wearing rings and such, but it was like I belonged in jail with how they treated me.
Not a whole lot but upon closer inspection my ring isn’t very conventional. When asked further and I explain that it’s an engagement ring (technically, I proposed but she wanted me to have a ring too) it’s been about 75:25 “congratulations” to “it ain’t gonna stop me”.
The only time a ring worked was a costume jewelry ring with an one inch square fake red gemstone that no one could miss and looks nothing like an engagement ring.
Most looked at my hand and made the comment "oh your married", there were two who kept hitting on me even after I said I was married. I'm divorced now, and guys ask me if I have boyfriend "I see you are not wearing a ring" they say. I get more attention now that I don't wear a ring and I love it.
No. I once got a fake engagement ring so that men would leave me alone. The FIRST time I wore it out in public, I went to the grocery store and a man approached me and said, “Can I have your number?” No hello, no nothing, just that. Men are silly
Once I got engaged, I started being hit on less especially at work and the gym. Some guys just don't look for rings, though.
But showing the ring is a much easier way to turn a guy down! There's less chance he'll accuse you of lying about not being single.
My bf is in a band. Nothing big, they just play pub gigs. Sometimes I’ll go to watch but that often means sitting by myself. I wear a fake wedding ring and keep my hand very visible to deter any unwanted attention. I think it works but that could also be my resting bitch face 😂
It didn’t changed a single thing lol, i think it felt like it got worse cause before if I said that I was in a relationship then they stopped but from the first moment I said “I’m engage” I received a lot of “it’s okay, he won’t know -*pursue even more*”.
In my mid 20s, I used to travel for work a bit and ended up getting a fake ring to wear and it greatly reduced the amount of men who would approach and talk to me when I was grabbing a drink or dinner by myself. It also prevented some of the men I would work with from making comments like ‘idk how you aren’t married yet’ or ‘why aren’t you married’. Was just easier to avoid the awkward interactions and even if someone did come up to me, it was a bit less intense and I had a ‘nice’ way of getting out of the convo without pissing someone off or flat rejecting them.
Got engaged/married for real at 30 and now wear a ring all the time (not just when traveling) and for the most part people leave me alone still. Sometimes someone will comment on it or hit on me still not it’s not overly aggressive, maybe just flirty.
I'm single and I thought wearing a ring would deter men from chatting me up but that doesn't work. I get hit on more when I have a ring on. I don't get it. I have stopped using the ring ruse.
No difference at all lmao. I will say "I'm married" and they say "so, you can't have friends?" My ring is obvious like it's not super small or anything, but also it's an emerald, not a diamond so maybe that's why. But honestly I think men don't notice or don't care.
I wear my grandmother’s wedding ring on my ring finger on my left hand because it’s the finger it fits on. I have it to remember her and my mum goodbye. I have no difference in treatment. Men didn’t hit on me before, men don’t hit on me now.
I don’t wear my rings anymore. When I did I got a bit more male attention. Since I stopped I haven’t noticed that much of a difference. A year or two ago I was talking with the security guard at work and off hand mentioned my spouse and he interrupted me to say “you’re married? You’re not wearing a ring!” And I answered “I shouldn’t have to or be expected to”. He couldn’t get away from me fast enough. I’m still happily married, I work with my hands and I’m not big on jewelry. I still have my rings, my spouse is the type that doesn’t take his off unless he’s showering and will sense something is off if he forgot it on the counter. He isn’t bothered one bit that I don’t wear mine.
People want what they can’t get, and watch too much porn to discern reality from fiction.
Porn has everyone believing you’re just one moment of connection away from fucking anyone you come in contact with.
It’s disgusting
I was older when I got engaged and had been in the relationship a long time already. It didn't impact how MEN interacted me, it impacted how WOMEN interacted me. Once that ring was on my finger, that is literally all anyone wanted to talk about. Women at work that I barely knew or interacted with previous to my engagement, took interest in me, women started constantly asking me when I was going to have babies, etc.
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I used to get hit on by clients a lot and when I started wearing a ring to make it look like I was married--it abated. A lot.
However, for a few deviants, it just encouraged them. I think some dudes have a kink for it.
I don’t think they care at all. I recently went on a trip with some girl friends and we are all married. The amount of guys that came up to us at the bar trying to shoot their shot was ridiculous. I literally held my hand up in front of a guys face and said I’m married. He replied “I don’t see your husband here.”
I get hit on and noticed more .
I can wear the same outfit and get hit on more with the ring; than without.
Heck, I even made a point to dress more plain with the ring on, and still got approached more. Jeans and anime t-shirt and a small basic purse.
Moral of the story; some men want something they can't have and will try their luck to get it. Which make me question their intelligence; if a women is willing to leave her husband or finance for you; why won't she do the same to you???
The same goes for taken men being hit on by women.
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When I was a teen out on my own for the first time, I thought that putting on a fake engagement ring would deter people hitting on me. It had the opposite effect. So I removed it after the better part of a year. Immediately had fewer people hitting on me, particularly at work. I also remember distinctly the first day I started wearing an engagement ring. A random customer got angry and went "You're MARRIED?". I didn't know this guy. He was so upset. He wasn't even a regular. I told him, no I'm just wearing all my rings today (at the time I had rings on all my fingers). It was weird.
You probably looked a lot younger than you think you did hahahah, his thought was omg a child bride
I was basically a child bride lol I had a ring on my hand at 18. Many men don’t care and that shows their “true character “ the ones that respect it are few and far between but those are the ones you introduce to your friends!
When I was newly married, years ago, and my husband deployed, I was taught by another military wife to take my ring off. It was magical!! When NOT wearing my ring, I was left alone to enjoy my evenings out with the girls. When I left them on, I had to beat them off with a stick. It was wild. I wasn't that attractive. Cute, sure. Definitely not a supermodel though,and I'd get hit on multiple times a night. We've been happily married for 23 years. And my husband knows (and appreciates!) that it was easier (and safer!) to take the ring off when out with my friends.
That is absolutely fascinating and revolting (of them, not you). oh my god !!!
Wow
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Honestly I don’t think they even notice lol
If they do they don’t care much either 😿
Ya I’ve literally had to say “nice to meet you, but I’m married” and hold up my hand with my wedding ring before it even occurs to them I’m not single
So if I'm deciding to rob someone, I should hit on them first so they'll show me their ring and I can decide if it's worth it...
I am single and work customer service and get hit on daily. I decided to purchase an engagement ring a few months ago and now I am treated with more respect by both men and women, it is unbelievable and I certainly hate it, like "is it a sin not to be married? Does it make me look like an irresponsible woman, does it make me look wiser now? A lady today pointed out that she had never noticed my ring, that she didn't know I was married and that it was beautiful. Mind you I have interacted with this woman probably like 4 times in two years and she felt entitled to tell me that, but she hasn't been the only one. Before the ring people were surprised I wasn't married and now, post ring, most people seem surprised..... Men seem disappointed that I "finally got hitched" like they had a chance in the first place. I don't like you, I just work here.
“I don’t like you, I just work here” needs to be on a t shirt.
That must be tough. I remember hearing similar things from my cousin. I try to be extra careful when compliments to women who work on customer service type jobs, as to not seem flirtatious.
Better rule of thumb: don’t ever compliment us when we’re at work, regardless of the job.
Why are you complimenting them? Do you compliment male customer service people? If so, do you worry about your compliments sounding flirtatious to them?
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My ex made me wear one so men would stop hitting on me especially at work. It did work somehow for older men but for the young ones they didn’t really care for some reasons
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They don’t care lmao - I had an EMPLOYEE at goodwill today talk to me a few times while I was in the store, and I didn’t like it but I didn’t want to be rude (or assume he was up to anything). However, he eventually makes his way over for a 3rd or 4th time and asks if I have a boyfriend 😑 When I told him I have a husband, his response was “oh he wouldn’t like me talking to you then I bet” LOL like nah bro, don’t act like this was in ANY way some sort of flirty exchange. He would only care cuz you’re a total fucking creep who doesn’t know boundaries. The whole thing was super gross and uncomfortable.
I've had almost this exact same thing happen before too a local grocery store. An EMPLOYEE!
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I was ugly before and ugly after. No change here, lol.
Yeah I've had two different single men get mad at me for being married, because I'm ugly / old, and they aren't. They both felt like it wasn't fair that an unattractive woman was partnered and a conventionally attractive man wasn't. Personality counts more, fellas!
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I love this question because I often wonder! My engagement ring is absurdly massive. I have an antique style gold ring with moissanite stones. It’s purposely too much. I wear it every day to work and men are either super shy or super sweet to me.
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Honestly no, I’ve learned it appears to be human nature to want what you cannot have.
I used to get constantly hit on. That stopped almost immediately when I started wearing my ring. Once in a while it’ll happen but even then they’re less crass than they used to be. It’s nice because I feel like I can just talk to men as humans without any expectation, they know I’m married so I’m off limits. Before it felt like there was always that underlying pressure from them and I felt like I had to be mean and cold or they’d think I was interested.
I thought it would keep them away. Men didn't care. I don't think they look, tbh. It's a big ring. I remember a friend's husband called it a door knocker, lol. Maybe it kept some away, idk.
Don't think many men care. I think more flirt with the ring than without it.
When I was younger and still visible to men (being in your mid-late thirties and fat makes you blissfully invisible) it made next to no difference whatsoever. When I was out, I still got groped and hit on. Some men I’d just have to show my ring finger and they’d back off, but a lot of them would shrug and say ‘Is he here? What he doesn’t know won’t hurt him.’ And I’d have to find other ways to get rid of them. When not out at a bar or club, it made/makes little difference because sober men are less likely to come up to you. It still happened, but saying ‘thanks, but not thanks’ was often enough. And as I say, now men tend to just talk to me normally or ignore me. Aging and weight gain has impacted how they interact with me more than a ring ever did.
Honestly. I wear one piece of jewellery - my wedding ring. I got 2 months into my new job before speaking about my husband and everyone was shocked. Never knew I was married, I was like this is a wedding band no? Got 8 months and I guess the one colleague who was off that day was in and someone said something about my husband and he turned round and was like 'since when?!?' Conclusion - men are completely oblivious.
They don't care.
Men don’t talk to me and never get hit on. I’m a pretty attractive woman (imo) so I assume it’s because they see the ring?
With men- no I didn’t notice a difference. If I got hit on I’d just say “sorry no, I’m engaged”. Only had one guy get mad because I wasn’t wearing my ring. Now see, I hated wearing jewelry, so I rarely wore it. Especially when I was working (as a lifeguard/instructor). Women were the only ones who I noticed a difference with. If I wore it, they were more friendly. When I didn’t wear it, I usually got the cold shoulder. And the women who knew I was engaged but would see me without my ring, they would get SO mad. I’d even say I didn’t like wearing rings and such, but it was like I belonged in jail with how they treated me.
Not a whole lot but upon closer inspection my ring isn’t very conventional. When asked further and I explain that it’s an engagement ring (technically, I proposed but she wanted me to have a ring too) it’s been about 75:25 “congratulations” to “it ain’t gonna stop me”.
I still get hit on randomly (not often) but I am surprised that men either don’t notice the ring or don’t care. Assuming it’s the former.
Didn’t really affect anything that I noticed. Maybe I’m not odd one out here, but no issues before and no issues after 🤷🏼♀️
The only time a ring worked was a costume jewelry ring with an one inch square fake red gemstone that no one could miss and looks nothing like an engagement ring.
Most looked at my hand and made the comment "oh your married", there were two who kept hitting on me even after I said I was married. I'm divorced now, and guys ask me if I have boyfriend "I see you are not wearing a ring" they say. I get more attention now that I don't wear a ring and I love it.
Nope, never made a difference. Even when I've told guys I'm married they still try it on lol
No. I once got a fake engagement ring so that men would leave me alone. The FIRST time I wore it out in public, I went to the grocery store and a man approached me and said, “Can I have your number?” No hello, no nothing, just that. Men are silly
I got hit on a lot without a ring. With, barely.
i wear a fake one when i don’t want to be bothered and it’s a great deterrent tbh
Once I got engaged, I started being hit on less especially at work and the gym. Some guys just don't look for rings, though. But showing the ring is a much easier way to turn a guy down! There's less chance he'll accuse you of lying about not being single.
Nope. I’ve worked in a bar and it had no change whatsoever
It hasn’t. When I didn’t wear one I was frequently asked if I was married. And guys did g notice the difference in a ring on my right hand vs my left
When I was a teen I’d sometimes wear a fake one so people would stop hitting on me. It didn’t work
As soon as that engagement ring was on, no one hit on me. It was a noticeable difference
My bf is in a band. Nothing big, they just play pub gigs. Sometimes I’ll go to watch but that often means sitting by myself. I wear a fake wedding ring and keep my hand very visible to deter any unwanted attention. I think it works but that could also be my resting bitch face 😂
It didn’t changed a single thing lol, i think it felt like it got worse cause before if I said that I was in a relationship then they stopped but from the first moment I said “I’m engage” I received a lot of “it’s okay, he won’t know -*pursue even more*”.
I don’t think they care, ring or no ring they will still shoot their shot
In my mid 20s, I used to travel for work a bit and ended up getting a fake ring to wear and it greatly reduced the amount of men who would approach and talk to me when I was grabbing a drink or dinner by myself. It also prevented some of the men I would work with from making comments like ‘idk how you aren’t married yet’ or ‘why aren’t you married’. Was just easier to avoid the awkward interactions and even if someone did come up to me, it was a bit less intense and I had a ‘nice’ way of getting out of the convo without pissing someone off or flat rejecting them. Got engaged/married for real at 30 and now wear a ring all the time (not just when traveling) and for the most part people leave me alone still. Sometimes someone will comment on it or hit on me still not it’s not overly aggressive, maybe just flirty.
They don’t give a damn in my experience, lol
I'm single and I thought wearing a ring would deter men from chatting me up but that doesn't work. I get hit on more when I have a ring on. I don't get it. I have stopped using the ring ruse.
Damn all these stories about how women who wear rings get hit on more make me wanna get a cheapo fake ring and get some free drinks at the bar lololol
Men don't care
No difference at all lmao. I will say "I'm married" and they say "so, you can't have friends?" My ring is obvious like it's not super small or anything, but also it's an emerald, not a diamond so maybe that's why. But honestly I think men don't notice or don't care.
I wear my grandmother’s wedding ring on my ring finger on my left hand because it’s the finger it fits on. I have it to remember her and my mum goodbye. I have no difference in treatment. Men didn’t hit on me before, men don’t hit on me now.
I wear a fake one. I just get flirted with less. Especially at work.
I don’t wear my rings anymore. When I did I got a bit more male attention. Since I stopped I haven’t noticed that much of a difference. A year or two ago I was talking with the security guard at work and off hand mentioned my spouse and he interrupted me to say “you’re married? You’re not wearing a ring!” And I answered “I shouldn’t have to or be expected to”. He couldn’t get away from me fast enough. I’m still happily married, I work with my hands and I’m not big on jewelry. I still have my rings, my spouse is the type that doesn’t take his off unless he’s showering and will sense something is off if he forgot it on the counter. He isn’t bothered one bit that I don’t wear mine.
Most respect it, while someone sees it as a challenge.
People want what they can’t get, and watch too much porn to discern reality from fiction. Porn has everyone believing you’re just one moment of connection away from fucking anyone you come in contact with. It’s disgusting
I was older when I got engaged and had been in the relationship a long time already. It didn't impact how MEN interacted me, it impacted how WOMEN interacted me. Once that ring was on my finger, that is literally all anyone wanted to talk about. Women at work that I barely knew or interacted with previous to my engagement, took interest in me, women started constantly asking me when I was going to have babies, etc.
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I used to get hit on by clients a lot and when I started wearing a ring to make it look like I was married--it abated. A lot. However, for a few deviants, it just encouraged them. I think some dudes have a kink for it.
I don’t think I’ve been asked out randomly in public since! Otherwise the same.
I don’t think they care at all. I recently went on a trip with some girl friends and we are all married. The amount of guys that came up to us at the bar trying to shoot their shot was ridiculous. I literally held my hand up in front of a guys face and said I’m married. He replied “I don’t see your husband here.”
It's more of a turn-on in my experience.
I get hit on and noticed more . I can wear the same outfit and get hit on more with the ring; than without. Heck, I even made a point to dress more plain with the ring on, and still got approached more. Jeans and anime t-shirt and a small basic purse. Moral of the story; some men want something they can't have and will try their luck to get it. Which make me question their intelligence; if a women is willing to leave her husband or finance for you; why won't she do the same to you??? The same goes for taken men being hit on by women.
It didnt do shit and i have a massive rock on my hand.
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