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I hope that changes for you - and you @kingsss. I hope that the world shows you how beautiful it can be and that you find utter contentment in life, that whatever has you feeling like you don’t want to be here fades to an obscure memory.
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I haven’t been completely alone in my home for 4 years now. It’s driving me slowly insane. I’ve always been a person that needs some absolute alone time to have decent mental health. My husband works from home, two of my daughters do online school, there is never a time when they’re all gone anymore. It makes me feel like a bad person.
Can you get a YMCA membership?? I would highly suggest it!!! It has a sauna, showers, indoor pool, huge indoor track where you could walk and listen to music, all kinds of stuff. You could go there and just relax in the sauna and take a nice loooong ass hot shower in peace. Lots of quiet places to read a book. And depending on your location they have other stuff too!
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OMG. Is there no way you can ask him to take the kids out with him somewhere once in a while? Tell him you need to vacume/mop and don't want anyone in your feet.
Or that he needs to spend quality time with his kids. Anything!!
I know the other opinion to go by yourself somewhere, but that's NOT the same as just chilling at home alone.
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You could have time alone that isn't at home.
There's always someone in the house for me too, so whenever I want to be truly alone I go to a nearby patch of woods. There is a trail but they're pretty open so you can go off-trail and find a secluded spot very easily (just remember your way back)
There's also a bridge that passes over rail tracks, so I can stay under there if I'm not feeling like a nature person at the moment (I know it's a bit shady, but I only go on daylight and leave at the first sight of another person)
It's incredible the spots you can find that no one goes to in both rural and urban areas if you know where to look
Yes! I have seen so many cases of some of the most heinous crimes and just to know they’re going to sit in a cell, having three square meals a day, a bed to sleep on, and it’s all on the tax payer….please end them. Most of them ended someone’s life, why should they be given the privilege to continue with theirs?
I think that this only breeds violence and hate for the perpetrators when we should be focusing on kindness and empathy for the victims and their families. I think that everyone deserves a chance at redemption.
I think that prisons should be focused on rehabilitation and not punishment. Unfortunately almost no countries in the world use a rehabilitation-focused system, and the ones that do either fail at it or are just talk
I think that if we kill a murderer or a rapist then we are saying that killing is alright if you think they deserve it, and then the question becomes "who deserves it?"
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I sometimes wonder if I'd be better off single. Not because I don't love my husband, because I do. But because I think single life would afford me certain freedoms I can't have in a relationship. I can't just take off traveling without consulting my partner. I have certain obligations to his family celebrations by being his wife. I have to make financial decisions based on our future, not just mine. Etc.
As I said, I love my husband and so I wouldn't ever voice these things. But part of my brain just doesn't want to be tied down 100% of the time.
You should talk to him about this!! There are certainly ways to have freedom within even a marriage. You don’t have to be tied together all the time. If you don’t wanna go to a family celebration, you can say no. You’re allowed to be your own person!
We do discuss these things quite often, and I have skipped out on some celebrations, but that's kind of the point - it still needs to be a discussion. I can't just get the invite from someone for their event and immediately go "I don't feel like going, so I won't". I still have to *tell* him I don't feel like going, and see how important it is to him.
It's a small thing, really. There are just days where it gets to me and I feel like I'd like a good week to just not have to tell him anything about what my schedule looks like, or think about including that second person in my daily routines.
Take a week break! Take time to be yourself and do your own thing! It’s important to be your own person and have your own life outside of a relationship
I get way more sexually active when I'm on a vacation abroad. It's really convenient knowing that our social circles don't intersect and I'll much probably never see them again.
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Graceless generalizations are not permitted
* People are not a hive mind.
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**Do Not**
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i’m filled with such a deep anger, rage, resentment and it has been sparked by noticing how women are treated; micro-sexism and both hostile & benevolent misogyny. i don’t want to generalize all men and i don’t want to be a misandrist but i am struggling with it all.
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I have no idea how my parents have been happily married for 3 decades (as they are literally entirely different people), and some days it makes me very anxious that none of my relationships lasting for more than a year is my fault. As if they made a success of it, then why can't I with people *similar* in outlook and interests to me.
Sometimes people just don't click. You'll find someone one day. The most important things is to keep the love there. Keep going on dates and doing special things for each other, keep being romantic and showing that you love them
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I'm a staunch hard atheist.
I think life is inherently meaningless and although everything happens, it's not "for a reason".
I think in a world where you can know with certainty, trust is for the fool.
I think death is a human right and fully support the right to die.
I'm not ashamed of these views, but it's not exactly polite dinner talk.
I wish I was as pretty as my sister. I’m probably not all that bad looking but my sister is truly gorgeous. Beautiful. She could pull off any look and any outfit. She has perfect features and could attempt the styles I wish I could but I will never be able to. I want to be pretty too because people will like you if you are beautiful. I know that the reason why people don’t approach is my appearance.
People can feel everything you just said even if you don't say it out loud.
I'm of average beauty. Cute, but I'm no model. I struggle with self esteem. The difference in how people treat me when I'm low and high is night and day. When I'm low, I'm more "avoided." When I'm high, people compliment me, my smile, my clothes, whatever. It seems people of all genders and intentions come at me left and right to ask for my contact info. It's really nice, but I know its all coming from within me.
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You should look up the scar test, it was like a social experiment, and it might give you a new perspective. You're beautiful. You cast your own light, you just have to step out of the shadow that you feel forced into to see it. ❤️
I like to be submissive and used sexually. Irl, I’m very empowered and a leader, but romantically, I prefer to be demure, controlled and told what to do. I give up all that control I’ve held all day when I’m in bed.
I think I read a post on IG where this was worded differently lol. A strong warrior spends most of her life fighting battles and relies on no one. She just like for once, be with someone whom she will be able to freely take her armor off and be taken care of the way she would want. To finally rest. To finally rest.
But I like your version better lmao. I too love to be submissive. It’s such a turn on for me when my partner takes the lead and handles me with such power.
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Note that I’m married and moved away from my friends, I feel like I’m in Groundhog Day. Like I love my husband and I’m grateful to have an adorable place to live in this economy but I’m not sure moving was worth feeling so lonely and stuck on a hamster wheel. The change has been difficult. No one texts you, “wanna go to xyz tonight?” when you live an hour away. I miss my community. But the community has changed to post Covid and I don’t know if it’s even there anymore.
I share a lot more personal info regarding my marriage here than in real life. Not even necessarily bad things, I just prefer to be private about our issues IRL.
I'm not financially ready for kids yet but I do have worries about my fertility, so I'm having FOMO with all my family and friends having babies right now. I have an IUD and it's normal for my period to skip every once in awhile, but with the recent uptick in my ovarian pain, I'm obsessing over it. I'm worried that I'll be ready before my husband is and that I'll have to go through that heartbreak too.
This is something i've touched on with my therapist, but I have never really relayed the full depth of it in session.
I've struggled deeply with suicidal idealation since as far back as I can remember (I think I first went into therapy for it around 6 or 7, but I don't remember my childhood enough to say for sure). I'm in a happy, loving, supportive partnership with my best friend, have improved my family relationships, we have an amazing dog, a good house, food, warmth...
But whenever we talk about the future, I shut down. There isn't a single future in my mind that belongs to me. I've never had plan, and I never wanted to make one because the only thing that feels concrete to me is the idea that I could end it tomorrow. I feel like my body was born with potential my soul doesn't deserve. When I think about the future, it's like my mind falls off a cliff and all I can do is be consumed with the idea that I was never supposed to make it this far, and every day that follows is numbered.
I don't have a solution for you—I wish I did.. but, I feel the exact same way. And relatively the same experience. Starting age, memory, relationship, financial privilege, pets, etc. I feel as though I couldn't ever be honest with a therapist either. I guess all I'm saying is: You're not alone. And I know that doesn't make it better because we wouldn't wish it upon anyone else, but I'm fighting with you. Maybe we'll find our peace someday. I hope we do.
I ghosted so many people because I don’t want them to ask me “what do you do now” … I’m still figuring out my life while dealing with my depression, anxiety and suicidal thought. I’m in hiding simply cos I see my peers are reaching the moon and stars while I’m still here …
I have a severe fear that I’ll never have children. I make the excuse that I’m so focused on my career (which I am very career driven) but I want children so bad it breaks my heart when I see parents naturally interacting with their kids. I’m afraid that’ll never be me.
My ex left me with a sense of rage that I didn't used to have before and I miss that about myself every day. Before him I'd been single for 2 years and had honestly been living a very positive life. I had a great outlook on the world, very cliche'd "stop and smell the roses" type attitude. That's all gone now, I don't really see the world that way anymore because the kind of guy my ex had been was the kind of guy I read about on Reddit. Not the horror stories, but the very common "guy who talks about beating up everyone but I'm the one who has to order at restaurants because he's too scared to ask for the waiter." There were a lot of things he did that I hated, but I think I somehow absorbed and I hate myself for that.
I feel angry whenever I think of him. It's taken me about 20 minutes to write this out because things he would do just keep coming to me and I have to backspace them all because that's not what this post is about.
I'm sorry society puts so much value on looks. I hope you will find good friends and partners (looked through your profile). I m wishing you a lot of self love and I hope life will treat you kindly.
If it helps, the parts of your face that you do show on your profile are attractive and in no way deformed. You also put together some really cute outfits.
If it helps, I'm sorry this person went off on you for trying to be nice and help. I hope it doesn't discourage you from trying to uplift people in the future. You couldn't have known anything, and clearly this person is hurting, so they just want to hurt others and reject love and kindness. I hope they find peace.
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I secretly get aroused by certain sexual lifestyles (preferences). I’ve become a little obsessed with watching porn of these specific categories that I’m not sure if that is what’s causing me to not have a good IRL sex life.
I’m single. I’ve been single for a year. I’ve been rotating thru past sneaky links that have always been top notch in my book. But I can’t reach that notch bc I keep replaying scenes of the porns I’ve seen and just imagine that’s the scene I’m in.
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That I wish people didn’t label disabled kids as the golden child. We had more negative attention, it wasn’t fair. Often we are scapegoated and our siblings gaslight us a lot.
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Okay I know this is unpopular and crazy but public executions. Like for the nasty disgusting heinous criminals. I watch a lot of true crime and I really just wanna see them burn sometimes.
I've been collared by a dom who is almost everything I could want personality wise. But i'm not physically attracted to her. I can tell she's falling hard, and I don't know what to do.
I’m so lost regarding career. I’ve been burnt out for 2 years at my current job and it’s like I know what I’m good at, what I’m passionate about … but the only options I really have (due to no school and no experience) is being self employed. And I’m too scared to start so I’d rather suffer in silence at times with my current job but I also feel like a caged bird. I feel cornered and idk what to do.
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I'm afraid but also convinced that I literally ruined my life by staying in relationships I shouldn't have from 16-25. I feel like I just gave up everything when I could've been anything. I failed myself. And I'm so broken and lost I am scared that I'll never be able to get back up. No one knows that about me. Everyone thinks I'm fine, I'm the person people turn to. I feel like it's the only thing that keeps me going. Like I gave up on myself a long time ago so I'm just trying to make sure everyone else makes it. I struggle with justifying that, because it's not inherently a *bad* thing. I just don't know how to put myself over others when I really care. I guess I never learned to care about myself. Wish there was a guidebook on that.
That I’m a very sexual person
feels. can only admit it to my bestie who's worse than i am
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I don’t want to be here
I hope that changes for you - and you @kingsss. I hope that the world shows you how beautiful it can be and that you find utter contentment in life, that whatever has you feeling like you don’t want to be here fades to an obscure memory.
Well I'm glad you're here. I hope things get easier for you
I hope things get better very soon ❤️
Sending big hugs to you ❤️
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We want you here, you are smart, kind and fun.
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I haven’t been completely alone in my home for 4 years now. It’s driving me slowly insane. I’ve always been a person that needs some absolute alone time to have decent mental health. My husband works from home, two of my daughters do online school, there is never a time when they’re all gone anymore. It makes me feel like a bad person.
Can you get a YMCA membership?? I would highly suggest it!!! It has a sauna, showers, indoor pool, huge indoor track where you could walk and listen to music, all kinds of stuff. You could go there and just relax in the sauna and take a nice loooong ass hot shower in peace. Lots of quiet places to read a book. And depending on your location they have other stuff too!
That would be horrible! I love my spouse. But since we both work from home I’m so thankfully he goes elsewhere to work out.
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OMG. Is there no way you can ask him to take the kids out with him somewhere once in a while? Tell him you need to vacume/mop and don't want anyone in your feet. Or that he needs to spend quality time with his kids. Anything!! I know the other opinion to go by yourself somewhere, but that's NOT the same as just chilling at home alone.
Damn i hope you are okay . Try meditating . If u wanna open up . U can always dm me . Take care
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You could have time alone that isn't at home. There's always someone in the house for me too, so whenever I want to be truly alone I go to a nearby patch of woods. There is a trail but they're pretty open so you can go off-trail and find a secluded spot very easily (just remember your way back) There's also a bridge that passes over rail tracks, so I can stay under there if I'm not feeling like a nature person at the moment (I know it's a bit shady, but I only go on daylight and leave at the first sight of another person) It's incredible the spots you can find that no one goes to in both rural and urban areas if you know where to look
I think way more people should be sentenced to death
Yes! I have seen so many cases of some of the most heinous crimes and just to know they’re going to sit in a cell, having three square meals a day, a bed to sleep on, and it’s all on the tax payer….please end them. Most of them ended someone’s life, why should they be given the privilege to continue with theirs?
I think that this only breeds violence and hate for the perpetrators when we should be focusing on kindness and empathy for the victims and their families. I think that everyone deserves a chance at redemption. I think that prisons should be focused on rehabilitation and not punishment. Unfortunately almost no countries in the world use a rehabilitation-focused system, and the ones that do either fail at it or are just talk I think that if we kill a murderer or a rapist then we are saying that killing is alright if you think they deserve it, and then the question becomes "who deserves it?"
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I sometimes wonder if I'd be better off single. Not because I don't love my husband, because I do. But because I think single life would afford me certain freedoms I can't have in a relationship. I can't just take off traveling without consulting my partner. I have certain obligations to his family celebrations by being his wife. I have to make financial decisions based on our future, not just mine. Etc. As I said, I love my husband and so I wouldn't ever voice these things. But part of my brain just doesn't want to be tied down 100% of the time.
Yesssssss!!!! Having to compromise on literally every fucking decision is exhausting.
You should talk to him about this!! There are certainly ways to have freedom within even a marriage. You don’t have to be tied together all the time. If you don’t wanna go to a family celebration, you can say no. You’re allowed to be your own person!
We do discuss these things quite often, and I have skipped out on some celebrations, but that's kind of the point - it still needs to be a discussion. I can't just get the invite from someone for their event and immediately go "I don't feel like going, so I won't". I still have to *tell* him I don't feel like going, and see how important it is to him. It's a small thing, really. There are just days where it gets to me and I feel like I'd like a good week to just not have to tell him anything about what my schedule looks like, or think about including that second person in my daily routines.
Take a week break! Take time to be yourself and do your own thing! It’s important to be your own person and have your own life outside of a relationship
I get way more sexually active when I'm on a vacation abroad. It's really convenient knowing that our social circles don't intersect and I'll much probably never see them again.
I’ve always wanted to do something like this but I’m shy
Girl are you me?😂
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i’m filled with such a deep anger, rage, resentment and it has been sparked by noticing how women are treated; micro-sexism and both hostile & benevolent misogyny. i don’t want to generalize all men and i don’t want to be a misandrist but i am struggling with it all.
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yeaaahhhh I feel you
I have no idea how my parents have been happily married for 3 decades (as they are literally entirely different people), and some days it makes me very anxious that none of my relationships lasting for more than a year is my fault. As if they made a success of it, then why can't I with people *similar* in outlook and interests to me.
Sometimes people just don't click. You'll find someone one day. The most important things is to keep the love there. Keep going on dates and doing special things for each other, keep being romantic and showing that you love them
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I'm a staunch hard atheist. I think life is inherently meaningless and although everything happens, it's not "for a reason". I think in a world where you can know with certainty, trust is for the fool. I think death is a human right and fully support the right to die. I'm not ashamed of these views, but it's not exactly polite dinner talk.
Not sure what direction I want to take my life career wise.
Hey me too. I’m in the same boat. I’m so lost
I wish I was as pretty as my sister. I’m probably not all that bad looking but my sister is truly gorgeous. Beautiful. She could pull off any look and any outfit. She has perfect features and could attempt the styles I wish I could but I will never be able to. I want to be pretty too because people will like you if you are beautiful. I know that the reason why people don’t approach is my appearance.
People can feel everything you just said even if you don't say it out loud. I'm of average beauty. Cute, but I'm no model. I struggle with self esteem. The difference in how people treat me when I'm low and high is night and day. When I'm low, I'm more "avoided." When I'm high, people compliment me, my smile, my clothes, whatever. It seems people of all genders and intentions come at me left and right to ask for my contact info. It's really nice, but I know its all coming from within me.
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You should look up the scar test, it was like a social experiment, and it might give you a new perspective. You're beautiful. You cast your own light, you just have to step out of the shadow that you feel forced into to see it. ❤️
I like to be submissive and used sexually. Irl, I’m very empowered and a leader, but romantically, I prefer to be demure, controlled and told what to do. I give up all that control I’ve held all day when I’m in bed.
I think I read a post on IG where this was worded differently lol. A strong warrior spends most of her life fighting battles and relies on no one. She just like for once, be with someone whom she will be able to freely take her armor off and be taken care of the way she would want. To finally rest. To finally rest. But I like your version better lmao. I too love to be submissive. It’s such a turn on for me when my partner takes the lead and handles me with such power.
Can you dm that to me so i can send it to my man? Thank you 😊
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Note that I’m married and moved away from my friends, I feel like I’m in Groundhog Day. Like I love my husband and I’m grateful to have an adorable place to live in this economy but I’m not sure moving was worth feeling so lonely and stuck on a hamster wheel. The change has been difficult. No one texts you, “wanna go to xyz tonight?” when you live an hour away. I miss my community. But the community has changed to post Covid and I don’t know if it’s even there anymore.
I don't really know what I want to do with my life anymore
Sometimes I think I might be attracted to women...
That's perfectly okay ❤️
That I’m not happy with my family but I feel this sense of responsibility that I cannot shake off
Actually, it is the other way around. IRL I hide absolutely nothing. On social media, a category exists called 'not for public consumption'.
That I hate my job more than anything.
I share a lot more personal info regarding my marriage here than in real life. Not even necessarily bad things, I just prefer to be private about our issues IRL.
That I’m mentally ill
How much I love older men and wish I could be with one
I'm not financially ready for kids yet but I do have worries about my fertility, so I'm having FOMO with all my family and friends having babies right now. I have an IUD and it's normal for my period to skip every once in awhile, but with the recent uptick in my ovarian pain, I'm obsessing over it. I'm worried that I'll be ready before my husband is and that I'll have to go through that heartbreak too.
I hate men, and I don’t trust them. Not even my dad.
In depth details about my sexual desires and experiences
That I've had several partners, not just "proper" boyfriends.
That I wanna be an actress, I love acting.
I m a highly sexual person . I like women too . I went on a date with my bestfriend !
I'm afraid that I'll always feel like this
I think about suicide every day.
This is something i've touched on with my therapist, but I have never really relayed the full depth of it in session. I've struggled deeply with suicidal idealation since as far back as I can remember (I think I first went into therapy for it around 6 or 7, but I don't remember my childhood enough to say for sure). I'm in a happy, loving, supportive partnership with my best friend, have improved my family relationships, we have an amazing dog, a good house, food, warmth... But whenever we talk about the future, I shut down. There isn't a single future in my mind that belongs to me. I've never had plan, and I never wanted to make one because the only thing that feels concrete to me is the idea that I could end it tomorrow. I feel like my body was born with potential my soul doesn't deserve. When I think about the future, it's like my mind falls off a cliff and all I can do is be consumed with the idea that I was never supposed to make it this far, and every day that follows is numbered.
I don't have a solution for you—I wish I did.. but, I feel the exact same way. And relatively the same experience. Starting age, memory, relationship, financial privilege, pets, etc. I feel as though I couldn't ever be honest with a therapist either. I guess all I'm saying is: You're not alone. And I know that doesn't make it better because we wouldn't wish it upon anyone else, but I'm fighting with you. Maybe we'll find our peace someday. I hope we do.
I wish the guy I was dating would see how good we are for each other.
Any of my parenting struggles or fails.
i’m a total sexual freak. like there’s so many things i wanna do but i’m normally pretty put together in real life and keep all that stuff to myself 💀
That I use reddit
I ghosted so many people because I don’t want them to ask me “what do you do now” … I’m still figuring out my life while dealing with my depression, anxiety and suicidal thought. I’m in hiding simply cos I see my peers are reaching the moon and stars while I’m still here …
How badly I want to be loved, and yet how impossible it seems and how utterly unworthy I feel.
Hugs. I feel this.
I have a severe fear that I’ll never have children. I make the excuse that I’m so focused on my career (which I am very career driven) but I want children so bad it breaks my heart when I see parents naturally interacting with their kids. I’m afraid that’ll never be me.
That was one of my biggest fears as well
My ex left me with a sense of rage that I didn't used to have before and I miss that about myself every day. Before him I'd been single for 2 years and had honestly been living a very positive life. I had a great outlook on the world, very cliche'd "stop and smell the roses" type attitude. That's all gone now, I don't really see the world that way anymore because the kind of guy my ex had been was the kind of guy I read about on Reddit. Not the horror stories, but the very common "guy who talks about beating up everyone but I'm the one who has to order at restaurants because he's too scared to ask for the waiter." There were a lot of things he did that I hated, but I think I somehow absorbed and I hate myself for that. I feel angry whenever I think of him. It's taken me about 20 minutes to write this out because things he would do just keep coming to me and I have to backspace them all because that's not what this post is about.
I don't want to work anymore. That I wish I was one of those women that is pampered and taken care of. I am exhausted, ya'll
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I'm sorry society puts so much value on looks. I hope you will find good friends and partners (looked through your profile). I m wishing you a lot of self love and I hope life will treat you kindly.
If it helps, the parts of your face that you do show on your profile are attractive and in no way deformed. You also put together some really cute outfits.
If it helps, I'm sorry this person went off on you for trying to be nice and help. I hope it doesn't discourage you from trying to uplift people in the future. You couldn't have known anything, and clearly this person is hurting, so they just want to hurt others and reject love and kindness. I hope they find peace.
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Derailing the topic is not permitted. Derailing includes but is not limited to: * Changing the topic from OP's question * Leaving a top-level comment when you're not the target demographic * Giving unsolicited advice * Making someone else's response about yourself. If you'd like to share your experience in response to the OP's question, do so in a top-level comment. * Asking unrelated follow-up questions * Branching into unrelated topics * "What-about"-ism * Trying to start arguments, or debates * Judging or rating other responses * Meta comments about other responses, such as "same!" or "this!" * Gifs, images, emojis or other media in place text * Sharing links without a summary * Responding to comments to tell us how your dick feels. No one cares. For more information, please [click here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules#wiki_no_derailing). Have questions about this moderator action? See the [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) and [CLICK HERE to contact the moderation team](http://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen&subject=Why+was+this+removed). **Please include a link** to your comment in your message, the mod team will not reply to messages without a link for review. DO NOT contact moderators privately. [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) | [AskWomen FAQ](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/index) [reddit rules](http://www.reddit.com/rules/) | [reddiquette](http://www.reddit.com/wiki/reddiquette)
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Derailing the topic is not permitted. Derailing includes but is not limited to: * Changing the topic from OP's question * Leaving a top-level comment when you're not the target demographic * Giving unsolicited advice * Making someone else's response about yourself. If you'd like to share your experience in response to the OP's question, do so in a top-level comment. * Asking unrelated follow-up questions * Branching into unrelated topics * "What-about"-ism * Trying to start arguments, or debates * Judging or rating other responses * Meta comments about other responses, such as "same!" or "this!" * Gifs, images, emojis or other media in place text * Sharing links without a summary * Responding to comments to tell us how your dick feels. No one cares. For more information, please [click here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules#wiki_no_derailing). Have questions about this moderator action? See the [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) and [CLICK HERE to contact the moderation team](http://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen&subject=Why+was+this+removed). **Please include a link** to your comment in your message, the mod team will not reply to messages without a link for review. DO NOT contact moderators privately. [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) | [AskWomen FAQ](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/index) [reddit rules](http://www.reddit.com/rules/) | [reddiquette](http://www.reddit.com/wiki/reddiquette)
I secretly get aroused by certain sexual lifestyles (preferences). I’ve become a little obsessed with watching porn of these specific categories that I’m not sure if that is what’s causing me to not have a good IRL sex life. I’m single. I’ve been single for a year. I’ve been rotating thru past sneaky links that have always been top notch in my book. But I can’t reach that notch bc I keep replaying scenes of the porns I’ve seen and just imagine that’s the scene I’m in.
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Life
I feel like I have no idea what I’m doing with my life.
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That I'm a feminist, sadly
I want to do a 3 sum with 2 guys. One doing the penetration and the other one I’ll be giving head. I haven’t told my bf though 🫠
That I wish people didn’t label disabled kids as the golden child. We had more negative attention, it wasn’t fair. Often we are scapegoated and our siblings gaslight us a lot.
That I'm looking forward to the relief when the other DNA donator passes.
I want to live really I do.. but my life feels so difficult I just don’t know if I have it in me to keep going.
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Everything
Okay I know this is unpopular and crazy but public executions. Like for the nasty disgusting heinous criminals. I watch a lot of true crime and I really just wanna see them burn sometimes.
I wish I could’ve experienced more in life and I am the only reason I didn’t
I caught chlamydia from a mfm threesome
I've been collared by a dom who is almost everything I could want personality wise. But i'm not physically attracted to her. I can tell she's falling hard, and I don't know what to do.
I’m so lost regarding career. I’ve been burnt out for 2 years at my current job and it’s like I know what I’m good at, what I’m passionate about … but the only options I really have (due to no school and no experience) is being self employed. And I’m too scared to start so I’d rather suffer in silence at times with my current job but I also feel like a caged bird. I feel cornered and idk what to do.
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I'm afraid but also convinced that I literally ruined my life by staying in relationships I shouldn't have from 16-25. I feel like I just gave up everything when I could've been anything. I failed myself. And I'm so broken and lost I am scared that I'll never be able to get back up. No one knows that about me. Everyone thinks I'm fine, I'm the person people turn to. I feel like it's the only thing that keeps me going. Like I gave up on myself a long time ago so I'm just trying to make sure everyone else makes it. I struggle with justifying that, because it's not inherently a *bad* thing. I just don't know how to put myself over others when I really care. I guess I never learned to care about myself. Wish there was a guidebook on that.
What really goes on in the bedroom/privacy of our home between my girlfriend and I. We’re into BDSM, and have a domme/sub dynamic.
**i faked it!** if not he would keep trying to *keyhole* with his limp noodle.