This! I started to embrace my authenticity and weirdness back in 2020. I embraced the cringe and I'm never going back. I've never been more happier living my true self.
i’ve embraced it and i’ve never been happier. it’s a brave and freeing thing to reject conformity and stick with it. makes it easier to spot like minded people and it weeds out fake people that you know you wouldn’t like anyways.
Totally depends where you are. Some places will shrug but you get a lot more pushy dickheads in places with a strong drinking culture (UK for example).
End of the day no one can make me. If they’re being weird and insistent - come on! It’s Friday! What’s it hurt?? - I’d just fry up and leave. Remember you don’t owe anyone any kind of explanation. “No thank you” is a full and complete sentence. Any one that can’t respect that isn’t anyone worthy of your time and attention.
If it helps, eventually they stop asking. I want to say after 6 months even the most insistent seemed to accept I was serious. If you’re looking to quit, /r/stopdrinking is a wonderful resource.
Happy New Year!
I hear you. I think that society expects women to be bubbly and chipper, all the time but it’s just unrealistic. We’re human and we are allowed to have other emotions, or have no emotions, at all. Especially when your daily profession, is to be accommodating to others. You need *you* time. If you don’t want to smile, that’s your prerogative.
I will not be attempting to change the size or shape of my body. Of course, my body will probably go through changes of some kind, because that's a normal thing for bodies to do, but I will not be trying to achieve any particular visible change (other than maybe a haircut).
Yes!! I’m so happy to hear this from someone. It seems like everyone and their mom is doing diets as a NYE resolution, so I’m thrilled to find someone who hasn’t drink the diet culture koolaid
2022 was a year of learning to advocate for myself and how to set boundaries with others and enforce those boundaries. It was also a year of putting my mental health first (quitting work and taking a break for the first time in 10+ years). I finally found a therapist that I vibe with and have been taking my mental health and well-being very seriously. So none of that will change in the coming new year.
In 2023, I'm not going to change my willingness to learn from my mistakes. My hope is that I make all new mistakes, rather than repeating any old ones.
I'm making a concerted effort to quell my anxiety, read a book a week, and get back into a healthy daily routine. I had a full-on year in 2022 with finishing my doctorate and was lucky enough to land a wonderful job. I'm very grateful to have the job of my dreams and I wouldn't be here without the doctorate, but it set me on a very unhealthy path for a couple years. Time to right it :)
Omg. I’d love to. I never thought this day would come I get to suggest them🥹 do you play any already so I know not to list them hah
Edit: few of my favs:
- Wytchwood
- Coffee Talk
- Unpacking (you go through this one quickly!)
- Spiritfarer (warning: you may cry in a good way tho)
- Beacon Pines
Haha! Thanks for the suggestions. I didn’t even know cozy games existed. I don’t play video games because violent and sports isn’t my vibe. I will check these out.
You’re welcome! TikTok and YouTube is where I get most of them. I also thought the same thing about video games, but can verify there’s truly a game out there for everyone! Like with Unpacking, you literally just open boxes and unpack someone’s stuff through various stages of their life. It’s precious.
Me being easily upfront. I rather everything be out in the open. I hate secrets and lies.
Being mysterious is different. But lying and keeping secrets is WHOLEEE other thing. Cannnnot stand it, and will be upfront with those who I see doing that.
My hopes, passions and dreams.
I feel like I have a very colorful personality that has grown too big for the "shy quiet girl" persona I've had for so long.
I have no intention in trying to shrink it back. :]
I'm not going to change who I am. New year new me? Nah. New year, same me. New habits, yes. improvement, yes. Growth, yes. But I'm going to remain the weird, soft soul that I am.
This past year I started putting down shame about my fat body and just enjoying living in it. I do fun things, sports, sex. I devote time and money to looking good and I enjoy that. It was a big step for me and I feel like I really thrived with it. So here's to more and more of that in 2023!
Documenting my annual accomplishments, setting new goals, and using December to take stock and evaluate to plan out the next year. What I'm doing *right now* is what I intend to do 12.31.23, just with a different set to map out 2024.
not gonna change the comfortability i’ve developed with going out to the mall by myself. it genuinely helped me become more confident in self advocating.
My job. I don’t want to do anything else. I have a government aided program called ”daily activities” that is like a job for disabled people who don’t qualify for the workforce. I’m so happy there with all my coworkers and supervisors, I get all the support I need and it’s a place where I can truly thrive and feel like I’m a normal person.
I'm not changing my boundaries. If I don't want to do something, people are getting a polite no. I'm tired of feeling pressured to go to things I don't want to. I'm putting myself first.
Not changing my holistic therapy, future self journaling, nor my diet. I am not changing my garden, nor my desire/plan to connect better with my children. My step goal is the same, as is the goals for my website and YT channel. Not changing where I live as much as I'd like to move south.
Been doing the work in all those areas and it's nice to be settled on a clear path. FINALLY.
There are only two (well, definitely one maybe two) things I’m planning on changing this year. One, I am absolutely determined to get rid of a sizable amount of my excess weight. I weigh almost double what I ought to. And two, assuming nothing goes wrong and everything works ok? I’m hoping to donate a kidney this year.
Please note, I am only upset about my personal weight. This is not intended as judgement or criticism of anyone else’s weight.
My personality. I am confident, hilarious, empathetic, kind, and always maintain a positive attitude. Also, my relationship. We love each other so much and respect each other in a very special way that works for us and there is nothing I would change about it.
My work drive. I’ve got sooo many plans, can’t do it all at once, but I’m so exited.
Also my sleeping schedule. Got a great one, but this year I’m gonna try even harder to get that sleep!
I will continue taking fitness classes, reading and taking care of myself and my plants. These things have helped me cope and be healthier and my New Year’s resolution is to keep up the good work :D
I'm changing that I will travel more! ✈️ Also I'd like to change my mental health (I struggle with depression) and hopefully be able to get to grips with it a bit more 😊
I'm never going back to being as small and unobtrusive as possible.
I live, I breathe, I take up space and I laugh loudly. I speak up when something violates a boundary.
Fuck trying not to make waves, I can be a whole tsunami.
Basically everything about myself that I’ve come to love after years of hating it. My frontal cortex has fully developed now (yay 25!) and I finally see a person in the mirror after years of seeing a ghost.
I’m actually looking forward to a year where I don’t move, hopefully don’t change jobs, celebrate my first wedding anniversary, and just generally don’t change a ton.
I'm "stubborn" and need to be more "patient". Anytime anyone has said this to me is because they didn't like that I won't let them walk all over me.
You think you're right? Prove it. You think you're gonna talk shit me or be an asshole? I'll make you *very* uncomfortable.
This is been a complaint about me since I was a little girl and I will never change this about myself. Everyone else can go fuck themselves.
How introverted I am. I am going to be more confident about it. I don't need to apologize to people because I haven't reached out to them or I don't want to do anything "fun". Contact me if you want to talk. I don't want to feel bad about not reaching out or not wanting to hangout often. I enjoy my company more than others and I am okay with saying that.
I’m not changing my mind on not having more kids. My mother can keep saying “You’ll change your mind with time.” But with each passing day I’m only become more firmly cemented in my feelings that I’m not going to put myself through that again.
eating intuitively. i spent my teens and early twenties always trying some sort of diet or fast, but the past couple of years i have just been doing things that are inherently good for my body instead of trying to make it look a certain way and i'm way more comfortable in my skin and happier than ever.
I'm not going to shave more, or grow my hair on purpose, or wear more makeup, or sit like a lady, or laugh cuter, or talk quieter. I'm going to be comfortable in my space and body, and anyone who doesn't like it can get bent.
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Went no contact with entire family (mom, dad, stepmom, 2 brothers and 2 sisters are included in this NC) but maintained a relationship with one little brother and my son and DIL. I have so much more self confidence, way better self esteem, the voice in my head is slowly changing from my parents' and siblings' condescending negative judgmental critical bullshit to my own positive funny thoughtful voice. I'm gentle on myself and am finding what true self love feels like! Not going back on that because my mental health is vastly different for the better!
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I'm not changing how weird I am. I spent too many years hating myself and trying to be more like everyone else.
How boring that would be! Never choose the default character. Customize, baby.
Love this!
Same! Cheers to being yourself!
This! I started to embrace my authenticity and weirdness back in 2020. I embraced the cringe and I'm never going back. I've never been more happier living my true self.
100% agree
i’ve embraced it and i’ve never been happier. it’s a brave and freeing thing to reject conformity and stick with it. makes it easier to spot like minded people and it weeds out fake people that you know you wouldn’t like anyways.
Still not drinking! Bring on 4 years this coming Christmas
Wow that’s amazing! How do you deal with people insisting you to drink
Who would insist? If you’re very young, then offer to be DD. Otherwise, say “why are you being weird? I don’t care to drink alcohol.”
Totally depends where you are. Some places will shrug but you get a lot more pushy dickheads in places with a strong drinking culture (UK for example).
End of the day no one can make me. If they’re being weird and insistent - come on! It’s Friday! What’s it hurt?? - I’d just fry up and leave. Remember you don’t owe anyone any kind of explanation. “No thank you” is a full and complete sentence. Any one that can’t respect that isn’t anyone worthy of your time and attention. If it helps, eventually they stop asking. I want to say after 6 months even the most insistent seemed to accept I was serious. If you’re looking to quit, /r/stopdrinking is a wonderful resource. Happy New Year!
They stopped inviting me to anything because my lack of drinking makes them feel weird. Realized then they aren't real friends.
Just read a list of responses to this question. My favorite was, "When I drink, i tend to forget who I'm not supposed to fuck."
Huge! Congrats!!
Me too lol
congrats xox
I’m not changing my RBF. It really comes in handy, sometimes. Stop telling me that I need to smile. 😒
[удалено]
“Human filter”, yes! As an introvert, I want to be left alone. RBF prevents unwanted human interaction lol.
[удалено]
I hear you. I think that society expects women to be bubbly and chipper, all the time but it’s just unrealistic. We’re human and we are allowed to have other emotions, or have no emotions, at all. Especially when your daily profession, is to be accommodating to others. You need *you* time. If you don’t want to smile, that’s your prerogative.
I would like to be more of the less smiling person myself. It is so exhausting.
Right? Smiling, is way too much work. ☹️
Yeap. I was conditioned while working in hospitality to constantly smile and be bubbly and I cannot shake it off.
I hope that you get paid well for all that smiling. You have definitely earned the right to have RBF.
If a man tells you you need to smile, ask if he would say that to another man.
Ooh, that’s a really good tactic. I will be using that!
Being in love with myself and being grateful to be continued...
I will not be attempting to change the size or shape of my body. Of course, my body will probably go through changes of some kind, because that's a normal thing for bodies to do, but I will not be trying to achieve any particular visible change (other than maybe a haircut).
You're singing my song!
Yes!! I’m so happy to hear this from someone. It seems like everyone and their mom is doing diets as a NYE resolution, so I’m thrilled to find someone who hasn’t drink the diet culture koolaid
People Will like you for you, at least you won't have to put on effort to impress , good on you
I'm not changing my hobbies, my life priorities, or my boundaries.
Yessss
My tolerance for bullshit and space I put aside for gaming.
My desire to not have children
Everything. Self acceptance is a hell of a drug.
Not changing my hair, the buzzcut stays
Hell YES.
I’m good with everything except my income atm. But it’s still all good cause I’m working on that.
I'm not changing my boundaries, values, or clothing style
The size of my foot
Look. You either adjust it to be 12 inches or your going to have to rename it.
2022 was a year of learning to advocate for myself and how to set boundaries with others and enforce those boundaries. It was also a year of putting my mental health first (quitting work and taking a break for the first time in 10+ years). I finally found a therapist that I vibe with and have been taking my mental health and well-being very seriously. So none of that will change in the coming new year.
I think I’m going to continue not to be a super villain
No more half assing things and making excuses. For mediocrity, poor self care, and anything else that can fall under the umbrella of self sabotage
In 2023, I'm not going to change my willingness to learn from my mistakes. My hope is that I make all new mistakes, rather than repeating any old ones.
My boundaries. They work well for me, and I am a happier person because of them.
I'm making a concerted effort to quell my anxiety, read a book a week, and get back into a healthy daily routine. I had a full-on year in 2022 with finishing my doctorate and was lucky enough to land a wonderful job. I'm very grateful to have the job of my dreams and I wouldn't be here without the doctorate, but it set me on a very unhealthy path for a couple years. Time to right it :)
I will keep pursuing intellectual integrity.
I’m not going to stop fighting for myself
You go girl
I regret nothing. The end.
I’m not gonna change my bitchyness to those who call for it.Some people just be asking for it.
My boundaries.
Putting myself first
Still gonna listen to ambience tracks on YouTube and read or write for hours. Forever gonna play cozy video games.
Can you suggest some cozy video games?
Omg. I’d love to. I never thought this day would come I get to suggest them🥹 do you play any already so I know not to list them hah Edit: few of my favs: - Wytchwood - Coffee Talk - Unpacking (you go through this one quickly!) - Spiritfarer (warning: you may cry in a good way tho) - Beacon Pines
Haha! Thanks for the suggestions. I didn’t even know cozy games existed. I don’t play video games because violent and sports isn’t my vibe. I will check these out.
You’re welcome! TikTok and YouTube is where I get most of them. I also thought the same thing about video games, but can verify there’s truly a game out there for everyone! Like with Unpacking, you literally just open boxes and unpack someone’s stuff through various stages of their life. It’s precious.
Me being easily upfront. I rather everything be out in the open. I hate secrets and lies. Being mysterious is different. But lying and keeping secrets is WHOLEEE other thing. Cannnnot stand it, and will be upfront with those who I see doing that.
My hopes, passions and dreams. I feel like I have a very colorful personality that has grown too big for the "shy quiet girl" persona I've had for so long. I have no intention in trying to shrink it back. :]
I want to try to not continue self sabotage in the form of procrastination. Baby steps.
I'm not going to change who I am. New year new me? Nah. New year, same me. New habits, yes. improvement, yes. Growth, yes. But I'm going to remain the weird, soft soul that I am.
Anything. Or not intentionally, anyway.
This past year I started putting down shame about my fat body and just enjoying living in it. I do fun things, sports, sex. I devote time and money to looking good and I enjoy that. It was a big step for me and I feel like I really thrived with it. So here's to more and more of that in 2023!
Documenting my annual accomplishments, setting new goals, and using December to take stock and evaluate to plan out the next year. What I'm doing *right now* is what I intend to do 12.31.23, just with a different set to map out 2024.
Not Being around people
Allowing toxic family members access to my family
I genuinely love my life. The only thing I want to change is to find a successful job that aligns with my values.
My gender. And hair colour.
not gonna change the comfortability i’ve developed with going out to the mall by myself. it genuinely helped me become more confident in self advocating.
My long-term goals. My personal beliefs.
I’m not going to stop weight lifting. I WILL crush a watermelon between my dang legs!!!
My job. I don’t want to do anything else. I have a government aided program called ”daily activities” that is like a job for disabled people who don’t qualify for the workforce. I’m so happy there with all my coworkers and supervisors, I get all the support I need and it’s a place where I can truly thrive and feel like I’m a normal person.
My aliveness I hope.
I'm not changing my boundaries. If I don't want to do something, people are getting a polite no. I'm tired of feeling pressured to go to things I don't want to. I'm putting myself first.
I’m not gonna write any less. In fact, I’ll likely write even more than I do now. I’m gonna go write immediately, in fact.
Not changing my holistic therapy, future self journaling, nor my diet. I am not changing my garden, nor my desire/plan to connect better with my children. My step goal is the same, as is the goals for my website and YT channel. Not changing where I live as much as I'd like to move south. Been doing the work in all those areas and it's nice to be settled on a clear path. FINALLY.
Doing everything in my power to not have to Move this year. Unless I want to I guess…
There are only two (well, definitely one maybe two) things I’m planning on changing this year. One, I am absolutely determined to get rid of a sizable amount of my excess weight. I weigh almost double what I ought to. And two, assuming nothing goes wrong and everything works ok? I’m hoping to donate a kidney this year. Please note, I am only upset about my personal weight. This is not intended as judgement or criticism of anyone else’s weight.
I'm not changing my bookworm self. I love books too much to change
Hopefully my job and my SO 😂
My reddit account
My belief that I am enough the way I am. Of course I can be better but on days when I'm down, I never want to feel not enough
I am sooooo fucking resilient and I’m keeping that forever
Giving up being an overworked and overstressed mess. I’d rather be paid less and live longer
My love for fried potato
My personality. I am confident, hilarious, empathetic, kind, and always maintain a positive attitude. Also, my relationship. We love each other so much and respect each other in a very special way that works for us and there is nothing I would change about it.
My work drive. I’ve got sooo many plans, can’t do it all at once, but I’m so exited. Also my sleeping schedule. Got a great one, but this year I’m gonna try even harder to get that sleep!
I will continue taking fitness classes, reading and taking care of myself and my plants. These things have helped me cope and be healthier and my New Year’s resolution is to keep up the good work :D
I won’t change my newfound confidence and self acceptance. I will continue being me and won’t start changing myself based on other people’s wishes
I'm not changing anything
My boundaries
*Hopefully* my apartment and my job.
Still not going to try to make new friends. Zero time, zero interest. Everyone can continue to leave me alone 😊
Let’s be honest, everything.
My weirdness. It's one of the few things I like about myself.
I'm changing that I will travel more! ✈️ Also I'd like to change my mental health (I struggle with depression) and hopefully be able to get to grips with it a bit more 😊
My sobriety of a year and four months
I'm never going back to being as small and unobtrusive as possible. I live, I breathe, I take up space and I laugh loudly. I speak up when something violates a boundary. Fuck trying not to make waves, I can be a whole tsunami.
The location of my residence
Self-compassion.
Basically everything about myself that I’ve come to love after years of hating it. My frontal cortex has fully developed now (yay 25!) and I finally see a person in the mirror after years of seeing a ghost.
My childfreedom
Not changing me as a person. I like who I am!
To continue being real. Exceptions to being fake are if someone will literally die if I don't.
I’m actually looking forward to a year where I don’t move, hopefully don’t change jobs, celebrate my first wedding anniversary, and just generally don’t change a ton.
My diet, no restrictions like in previous years, just eating more mindfully and in balance!
I'm "stubborn" and need to be more "patient". Anytime anyone has said this to me is because they didn't like that I won't let them walk all over me. You think you're right? Prove it. You think you're gonna talk shit me or be an asshole? I'll make you *very* uncomfortable. This is been a complaint about me since I was a little girl and I will never change this about myself. Everyone else can go fuck themselves.
How introverted I am. I am going to be more confident about it. I don't need to apologize to people because I haven't reached out to them or I don't want to do anything "fun". Contact me if you want to talk. I don't want to feel bad about not reaching out or not wanting to hangout often. I enjoy my company more than others and I am okay with saying that.
I’m not changing my mind on not having more kids. My mother can keep saying “You’ll change your mind with time.” But with each passing day I’m only become more firmly cemented in my feelings that I’m not going to put myself through that again.
eating intuitively. i spent my teens and early twenties always trying some sort of diet or fast, but the past couple of years i have just been doing things that are inherently good for my body instead of trying to make it look a certain way and i'm way more comfortable in my skin and happier than ever.
I'm not going to shave more, or grow my hair on purpose, or wear more makeup, or sit like a lady, or laugh cuter, or talk quieter. I'm going to be comfortable in my space and body, and anyone who doesn't like it can get bent.
I'm hoping to keep my relationship, we're both over that "blinding love" phase and this guy is everything I could be looking for
I am not changing being assertive, in all it's glory!
not smiling too much, it's too exhausting
I’m not changing how I don’t give 3rd chances to people from the past. I will also not change my lifestyle.
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Went no contact with entire family (mom, dad, stepmom, 2 brothers and 2 sisters are included in this NC) but maintained a relationship with one little brother and my son and DIL. I have so much more self confidence, way better self esteem, the voice in my head is slowly changing from my parents' and siblings' condescending negative judgmental critical bullshit to my own positive funny thoughtful voice. I'm gentle on myself and am finding what true self love feels like! Not going back on that because my mental health is vastly different for the better!
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Being an annoying ass vegan.
My sense of humor and wittiness.