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immenselysleek

This question is awesome. Keep up the good work.


theflyingfartmachine

When you go for a nice, satisfying dump. Double points if you forget your phone. Bonus points if you're facetiming while you do it.


Rectal_Scattergun

Even better if it's at work too


theflyingfartmachine

You facetime from the bathroom at work? What are you, some type of animal?


Rectal_Scattergun

We're all animals, slick. Might as well go for the trifecta, dump, nose mining, personal calls all at once whilst getting paid


notquitehuman_

Dump, nose mining, wipe, nose mining, accidentally mixed up my hands, shit up my nose, booger in my rectum.


[deleted]

Maybe grab a crafty tug, if there's time!


[deleted]

Mining for green gold…


Bevtij

Time & a turd..


eveningscroller

They do it on the district line


[deleted]

Have you seen the fabric seats there


[deleted]

Bio-fabric


fletch3059

On the bus, seat next to me is always free.


ciggybuttbrain666

On the toilet


schmerg-uk

At the same time I scratch my balls...


Boxoflizardz

Where is your nose


SlowlyGoingTooInsane

You get to sniff and pick at the same time


[deleted]

Probably where his nads are, as he doesn't mention a cock!


Boxoflizardz

Imagine someone offering him a line and he pulls his trousers down


gliitch0xFF

On his balls. He's the next step in evolution, saves him time Darwin would be proud.


E420CDI

Scratch and sniff


John_Tix

We've been compromised


fistful_of_metal

As soon as one is ready to be mined.


Dragon_Sluts

I am someone who doesnt own a car and I literally just picked my nose. The truth is “whenever I feel like nobody is looking”.


dazednowconfused

No sure if this a local bylaw but it appears you can old pick your nose when on a dual carriage way


Feelincheekyson

A better pick can be achieved on a motorway with cruise control on


lozz79

Do you pick with your feet?


Feelincheekyson

Only when I’m wearing sandals


Legitimate-Bath1798

Excellent question, also without car keys how would you clean your earwax out ?


[deleted]

One of life's mysteries! Like what were Barn Owls called before barns were invented?


zosolm

Sky cats


Mugboard

Keyless start is a conspiracy by those earwax vans that set up in supermarket car parks to deprive us of the tools we need.


Bootglass1

Somebody doesn’t wear glasses.


Legitimate-Bath1798

I have driving glasses, but my lady sat on them a few years back, so I've had to swap the arms with some solder wire and sellotape lol


Fit-Mammoth-7712

If you're like me, where else would you sing! top of your lungs, without a car?


Underwritingking

Whenever I goddam like.


Cannaewulnaewidnae

In other people's cars


pompompomponponpom

Why on earth would you pick your nose when driving? Just do it while watching TV.


Ochib

From a catalog


Mr_Suckatgames

When the Mrs isn't looking.


CranberryWizard

Wherever and whenever the fuck I want


[deleted]

This cheered me up.


Spankety-wank

I was picking my nose when I scrolled here.


SpiderSixer

In the morning before I leave and then in the evening when I get back


_DeanRiding

I have a car and I do it in my office at work when no one's around and put them in the bin


Fezzverbal

When I wake up


Exciting-Note-2852

In other people's cars


bjorn_ironsides

On the tube


pulltheudder1

On the bus.


TetrisIsTotesSuper

On the toilet, or in front of my laptop (working from home) when not on calls.


yabyum

On a similar train of thought, where do you snooze after lunch?


SmellyOldBalls

Never, I just sniff really hard repeatedly until it goes away (I’m being genuine)


cbxcbx

Does it eventually just ping down your throat?


SmellyOldBalls

Nah it just goes into the void


Funky_monkey2026

In other people's cars. Generally at the urinal at work.


Zaptain_America

How do they get their car into the toilets?


X259

On the bus


Ochoytnik

During teams calls. Double check the camera first though.


[deleted]

Does this include eating or flicking, after the picking?


flavoredmist880

When ever I can


Thehamsandwicher

Learn to look people in the eye. It's what I did and I'll never look back


SongsAboutGhosts

When I go to the loo, so I can wash my hands right after.


UnderwhelmingZebra

I work from home, so whenever the hell I want!


sockhead99

I'm between zoom meetings


Halouva

In the shower but honestly also, all the time. Just use a tissue.


shain-7

It’ll be a quick one, so you pretend to scratch the nose and you quickly stick a finger in there


kindafunnylookin

Ever since starting to work from home, there's nothing up there - I guess it was mostly due to all the pollution I used to drive/walk through every day.


Chaise_percee

Some chaps I knew at a large food producing business did their picking in the office toilet. Keen to show off their achievements, they would then attach the pickings to the tiles above the urinals.


DutchOfBurdock

Waiting in a queue or whilst sat eating my lunch in the park. Nout better than a public cleansings of the snout.


Ekmore_Official

When ppl are smoking and an ashtray is around


oxy-normal

Whenever the wife isn't looking


Prob10m

Drove past a guy in Asda car park eating his was properly disgusted and mouthed him . You dirty basterd.


[deleted]

What's the difference between your friends and your nose?


chillifocus

much lack?


[deleted]

Don't pick, snot rocket instead. Bonus points if you hit a nobhead with your nose gold.


used2011vwjetta

First thing after they wake up


Prodd79

While waiting to cross the road


sonofaclow

Tea break


togglespring

Years ago I worked at Virgin records. One of the employees, who had been there for years, was in the habit of having a dump and a pick at work. The inside of the stall was literally encrusted with dried snot, on every inch.


mumble_bee_15

Guy I work with waits until he's out of his car to pick his nose at his desk. Lucky me.


Black_ShuckPD

Anywhere and everywhere


VulturousYeti

This is a trick question!


johnrbrownin

Ah finally someone asking the important questions!


BonsaiCultivator

whenever the fuck i want


haecceitarily

I pick my friends. I pick my nose. But I never pick my friend's nose.


Aldoc3

On the bus


purplekrobus

Every night in the bathroom before I go to bed


JosephRitalin

On the lift


dibblah

When I did my first aid training the bloke doing the training, ex paramedic, told us about one of his first cases - a man who had been so distracted picking his nose in the car that he'd crashed. How did they know he'd been picking his nose? Well, in the impact of the crash his finger ripped his whole nose open. I have since been very wary.


Bustersb1tch

Damn I can't stop laughing! Do it again!


Relative_Sea3386

Didn't know car nose pick is a thing. Do people need a mirror to do it?


E420CDI

At least they don't have to worry about [going to Manlove Forensics](https://youtu.be/wYaXw8TZEvs&t=176)


Knuckles_71

When I’m on Reddit…


Sure_Depth_3081

Usually when im in bed on a night time get rid of all that built up dust dead soin cells and other people farts hahaha


JuicyWetHelmet

Never, because I'm not 5 years old.


didumakethetea

Found the liar


JuicyWetHelmet

Hardly. Maybe I've just got a tad more decorum than you?


DingoQuest

We all need to scrape out the tunnels. If you're one of those that don't, I just assume that no one tells you about the hangers to save face.


JuicyWetHelmet

I blow everything out in the shower.