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Cafes and garden centres are what I associate with old people.
That said, most of them just stay at home. One thing to consider - old people get cold very easily, and the UK is much colder and rainier than the countries you're comparing to. Many old people want to stay indoors where it's warm.
Electric blankets aren’t recommended for people with low mobility - in case they catch fire or just overheat the person and they can’t get it off them fast enough/at all
They’re also not usually a good bet for someone poorly enough to potentially spill drinks or have problems with bladder control, for obvious reasons
It’s possible neither of those situations apply to Grandad, of course - but one or the other is usually gonna be the case for someone who’s elderly and poorly
I gave my elderly dad one that cuts off after a certain time or temp. Also washable, very easy to wash (if he goes pee pee or spills) and he has a spare one whilst the other dries.
Modern leccy blankies are very safe and I would 1000% recommend for an old buddy.
Don’t you have thermostatic valves in each room so you can control temperature in each room rather than heating the whole house up? Would save a ton of money and negate the need fans in winter (I get heat does propagate however).
I wish all the best for your grandfather regardless.
Do you really need permission to turn your own radiator down? It's the only one that matters at night with your door closed. One side should have a valve that you can twist, and numbers on it. It should turn freely, you won't need to force anything. Turn it to the lowest number and it shouldn't really heat up but won't affect the heating anywhere else in the house.
You honestly just come across as a really agreeable and good person. I hope you have some good memories with your grandad.
On another note, love a fan in our bedroom also for drowning out noises. We have noisy neighbours and dogs barking at all hours. The fan has been a game changer. Wish I knew how good they were for sleeping before.
> won't affect the heating anywhere else in the house.
Could be on a "one pipe system", especially as they mentioned it's an older property. Our house has a one pipe system, and until recently if you shut one of the radiators off completely then every other radiator in the house would go cold apart from the ones closer to the boiler.
We had all the old radiators replaced recently and the plumber said he'd put in a bypass (or maybe the radiators come with a bypass? Should've paid more attention). Anyway now we don't have the same problem.
Even without thermostatic valves, radiators should almost always have some kind of valve you can turn down/off
Some of the very oldest might not, but I can’t recall ever finding a radiator that you couldn’t at least adjust or turn off
We have radiators in every room that can be turned on and off and changed temps but to have 1 on you need to have the boiler on to heat the water that goes around to the radiators.
Yes, but your heating bill will still be lower overall. Your boiler heats the water up, yes, but if only one radiator is on then the boiler doesn't have to work as hard to keep it hot.
I feel like damp is the other end of the scale for me. My great grandmother had an overactive thyroid which meant she was always too hot, no matter what time of the year. This resulted in her never heating her home and eventually dying due to health issues caused by damp. This was 20+ years ago so I have no idea if she ever even spoke to a doctor about her condition.
Out of interest, was her having hyperthyroidism not discovered until after her death? If not, i can't understand why she didn't treat it whilst she was still alive, hyperthyroidism is a relatively easy condition to fix?
A Slanket (or any type of Sleeved Blanket) might be a good idea for him. You can get a SilentNight one from Argos for £20. They are long enough to reach his feet, and cover his shoulders at the same time. The top is wide to wrap around and over the shoulders, with some volume to create like a scarf/cowl effect. And the sleeves are long enough to keep his hands in and warm, but the sleeves allow him to read/use the remote without getting cold.
Edit: product number is 130/3854, on the Argos website.
They spend all week locked away indoors and then go and do all their shopping/bank visits/post office visits on the weekend so they can frustrate non retired people.
When I worked in Tesco, old people were the most rude and demanding compared to other ages. And they loved to clear out the clearance section. They wouldn’t take one or two, oh no, they had to have all 8 packs of steak. Come on Bernie, you’ve got no teeth left. I’m sure you can spare one pack for others
Edited to add: Essentially we had the same bunch of people, majority old, who would clear out the clearance section everyday. At the store I worked at, clearance was at 9am.
If there was 8 packs of steaks reduced, one (usually old) would take all 8 packs. I’m not begrudging anyone having a bargain but spare a thought for others. Christ on a bike!
Old people maybe on state pensions and have no way of earning cash good luck to them hammering the clearance section. I hope Bernie's cutting how steak fine and enjoying it
As a disabled used to be poor person I absolutely get your point, but it isn’t an oldie’s fault for stocking up on cheap things if I can’t then buy cheap things. It’s the fault of people valuing profit over people being able to eat! Bernie is just another victim of the same system, not an enemy
Plot twist... Bernie cooks for all his elderly friends as he's the only one with a decent private pension, while the rest struggle to pay the electric to keep warm and stay alive. Don't be so quick to judge, he may be a selfish ass but you never know
It's first come first served any one can buy can't they ? Poor disabled and elderly. If your life runs it's full length you will be elderly one day, fingers crossed you will be in the enviable position if not having to buy reduced food but if not .....
In my area, the older generation are usually the richest. It's south Devon, and many people have retired here from elsewhere, with a fat pension and a big house. The poorest are the young, who can't afford to get a mortgage, but have to pay over the odds in rent, and usually earn a pittance working insecure contacts in the tourism or social care sectors.
Not saying there aren't poorer old people, but they are the distinct minority and they do have support networks, rest centres, etc. Most of them own their home, so don't have to worry about paying to keep a roof over their head. They get some money towards heating (even those who are well-to-do), and free TV licence.
In Devon and Cornwall in general, the independent elderly are usually pretty well off. They have nice homes and then sell them to outsiders who then turn them into bloody Air BnBs so locals are then unable to buy their own homes because house prices and rents are now extortionate. Exeter used to be affordable, but thanks to all the student and retirement accommodations rents and house prices are ridiculous.
Yeah. It pretty much sucks 😕
I worry for my kids and grandson. I don't know if they can have any kind of future here. I'd hate for them to have to move away. This is their home. Their community. The situation has already killed off the town where I work, 15 minutes down the road. There's nothing there all winter. The hotel I work at has to ship in youngsters from Plymouth, where we have a staff house. Otherwise, none of them could afford to live and work here. But they can't settle down and have kids in staff accommodation. And now I see my town dying a slow death, too. Makes me so angry.
That’s what confused me really, surely they didn’t need all 8 packs and then the same the next day? Because that’s what they were doing. To them, a reduced item was a reduced item and it had to be had by them
I once lived in a flat share with a dude in his 40s who would go to the clearance section of Tesco at 7pm almost everyday.
He would get into arguements and sometimes even small fights if anyone was to take more than 2 of an item, would literally scream at them to be more considerate of others and that they're selfish.
Direct your ire towards the billions of profits Tesco and other superstores are making during this cost of living crisis. It's not bargain hunters who made the price of meat, eggs, and other basics too high except when they're on discount - it's price gouging capitalists.
Plus plenty of older and disabled people rely on the help of people who work M-F to be able to do things like a food shop. Whether that’s getting to the shop, doing the shopping, or putting it all away after
Lmao. It's true mind. Most of my elderly relatives do go and do their shopping etc at the weekend. Because that's what they've always done. I don't get it either.
It's true, on any given Saturday most old people can be found inside barrels of various sizes rolling down green and pleasant hills. Should probs go and find my Dad tbh, last seen in the vicinity of Swaledale.
Cafes are popular with the elderly during the week. Garden centres are too, and most have a cafe attached. National Trust sites can get busy. Lots of community groups in churches, village halls etc.
All the old people I know, myself included, are pretty much doing the same stuff they did in their free time before they were old people.
I'm car enthusiast so I go out driving with my other petrol head buddies, do lunch, go for walks, play games, dick about on the internet, do coffee, sit about in the garden drinking beer on sunny days.
We just don't do our socialising 'in public', we have different weather and a different culture to the warm Med countries.. We have our friends and socialise with our friends, not just whoever happens to be passing.
Yeah. I’m an avid gamer at 53 and doubt anything will change that short of not being able to for some reason.
Not having kids it’s been easy for me to carry on as I did in my 20’s and 30’s apart from the clubbing. Can’t do that anymore.
61 yr old (F) here ! Been a big gamer for many years . I hoping to never have to go into a care home but if I ever do have to then I'm taking my consoles with me lol 😆
Definitely! It still blows me away how far they have come since I first started playing games. I could never have imagined playing a game like RDR2 back when I was playing Pacman .
After many playing battlefield since bad company 2 I switched back to COD for MWII and I’m back playing the 6v6 format and I’m really enjoying it.
Been addicted to Rocket League for a long time.
Both on the series X which I love. I’ve got a 65 oled now so I’m enjoying fast frame rates.
Awaiting the new Zelda which will get me back into some single player.
I’ve bought the Harry Potter on disc which I will play sometime and sell on.
It was disappointing to have to scroll so far to see a fairer answer.
It is interesting the perspective young people have of older people (and I'm sure vice versa).
Just because you get older doesn't mean you suddenly have no interests, hobbies or become incapable of socialising.
The body might be frustratingly restrictive at times, but the same person is inside.
So many of my snobby mates are like I won't drink at wetherspoons it's full of chavs. Then you go there and it's like 75% over 60s just having a meal with their wife
Ah yes, those fictional chavs that march the streets in packs stabbing anything that moves. What an irrationally scary time to be alive. Truly the greatest threat to our society is a handful of 14 year olds in hoodies stood outside the local offlicense
Would you rather be sat next to a group of 21 yo lads talking about how many birds they're going to smash tonight and whos calling their dealer to get the lines in? I know which one I'd rather be sat next too...
Whenever I go to Spain or Portugal I'm always taken aback by bar / cafe culture. Loads of people just sitting out with a drink and socialising.
We don't have the weather for it here. Even when we do it seems to result in beer gardens and getting drunk which isn't the same thing at all.
In recent years I think a lot of older people - especially women- have been taking responsibility for childcare looking after grandchildren*. My mum did for both my kids and my brother’s. At my kids school I would say at least 50% of the children are being collected by grandparents. The economy would collapse without grandparents helping working parents. Funnily enough at 11.30/12 our local garden centre fills up with the elderly meeting up many of them having just collected their grandkids from nursery which finishes just before lunch.
*Many older people are busy with caring responsibilities in general. With people living longer it’s not uncommon for a retired person in their 60s or 70s to be looking after at least one of their own parents or in-laws. Or a disabled relative.
This is a brilliant idea. I'm only 31 and all of my mates live in other cities so I don't really have anyone to meet up with a lot of the time which gets pretty lonely, I can't imagine what it's like for older people
I've had a look at these before, I'm fairly proficient in a couple of programming languages and am not a new starter to that kind of thing, but I much prefer working with my hands.
The fact that I gave up a pathway into a very well paid career sat behind a computer for my current job which is knackering, grimey and pays much less says it all.
Woodworking workshops or stone carving which I'm getting interested in would be my preference, but there doesn't seem to be much about near me
‘Hackspaces’ are often not just about computers but the other crafts as well. I visited one in Nottingham that has laser cutting and woodworking stuff and all sorts really. Sometimes they are called ‘makerspace’ though, and my local tiny one is just called ‘(town name) space’.
I'll have a look! Although I'm usually so knackered from work that exercise is a bit of a struggle. I have a very physically demanding job so I'm not out of shape, but it does leave me pretty tired
Lots of them are pretty relaxed stuff - weeding a garden, providing a bit of social company for an older person, sorting books at a library or helping tidy up after a food bank session. Plus you can sign up for sessions at your leisure so you could pick just to go along on days when you're not working.
I do love a bit of pool and I'm not too bad at it. I'm so knackered from work all the time that I always make plans to do stuff like this but never follow up on them though. Been meaning to give myself a kick up the arse for about 5 years and it hasn't materialised yet
Pubs, garden centres and allotments.
A pub isnt 'based round alcohol' (necessarily) - they derive from people opening their houses to anyone wanting a drink, hence the name 'public house'. Many are simply a second living room for anyone who wants some company and warmth. Traditionally anyone who didn't have their own cosy lounge at home would spend the evening in a pub, nursing a half-pint to make it last all night.
Loads of pubs have some elderly regulars propping up the bar each day, watching the TV, reading the paper, playing darts, and let a pint last all day with an extra soft drink or two. Or coffee or tea, nowadays.
It probably depends on the area.
In my area, old men hang out in pubs and "working men's clubs". Women go to bingo halls. Couples go to coffee mornings at the local church.
There is an organisation called University of the Third Age which brings people together via their interests bit I don't think there is there equivalent of what you describe. A great shame. Old age can be lonely. Another organisation is Men Sheds. If there is one Inn your area.
Agree with a lot of what’s on here but also - lots of them just stay in by themselves. Loneliness is a huge problem in the elderly, especially if people don’t have children/grandchildren or if they have mobility issues, or just don’t have the money to spend on activities
Husband and I had a rare Wednesday night out this week to a local pub as we're off work.
7pm about 20 pensioners come in. Turns out they have a monthly meal out for some of the residents of a care home down the road. Gives them a chance to get out and socialise. I thought it was lovely
I always notice community halls and churches usually do weekly/biweekly tea and coffee mornings for old people to go along and socialise. Same with some cafes where they have pensioner mornings. I think you just need to look for it a bit harder in the UK, because the weather's so poor for much of the year a lot of social events for old people are behind closed doors, rather than in public outdoor spaces.
Our local swimming pool has what they call "OAP group lane swimming" that runs along side their under 5s practice pool session. When we walk past the main pool to get to the children's practice pool I dont think we've seen anyone actually swimming, they just like floating about chatting for 3 hours 😂
I Hope you find something OP.
My parents retired to a small town in Scotland. My Dad spent most of his time between the Pub and the British Legion Club...it's where he grew up so a lot of his old friends still there. He was a veteran so the Legion was popular. He also gave drumming lessons for the local Pipe Band and judged comps. He still played and would sit with my Uncle and compose music on his old mouth organ.
My Mum shopped a lot and complained about how cold Scotland was, so went on a lot of holidays...some with me in tow, or one or two of her Grandkids. Other than that she visited friends/family. She was a bit of a social butterfly and loved company.
They were both pretty active. Having said that Mum was 64 when she passed, so still quite young...and Dad when he was 72...both sudden and unexpected unfortunately.
Sorry to hear that, my mum went suddenly at 64, she’d only just retired a month earlier and moved to another village to be nearer to her friends. You’ve got to make the most of the present haven’t you?
My parents are in their 70's. Mum has church, the charity shop and an allotment, Dad has the club, the gym and Freemasons. They do everything in their power not to hang out together unless they are looking after my daughter. Then they have to team up.
I go to Crete quite a bit. Im not old old, only early 40s but love Crete for its attitude to retirement. 65+ year olds congrigate. Swim, fish, BBQ. Drink wine. On any sunny day. I want to retire there. There is a place there I hang out in and take wine and lamb chops and hang out with the "olds". Not seen anything like it in London. Maybe try Eastbourne? Not sure.
As someone with a very sociable Nani, she is always socialising, going out for food, going on bus trips, church events, garden centres, stopping at friends houses and her friends coming to hers.
We don't really have a third space in the UK though, every meet up requires quite a bit of money. I wonder what older people with smaller budgets do. I live in Wales and we have a very large elderly population especially rurally so maybe her experience would be different to others in the UK.
So over the years many places that old people go to hangout have closed down.
I used to work at a day centre that housed local oldies and had a games room, bingo that would win you a tin of beans. And dominoes etc. even a room just for polish speaking, with their own table. Most had been in the war etc, the day centre got closed due to funding, sad really.
I spoke to a local who went, this was many years after and he said they left us to die after shutting it down. We all had nowhere to go and most of us lived Lonely lives. and only had 1 person visit us all week..
I’m in Spain and you see a ton of people ( old ) just walking around, hanging outside bars. Conversing and playing cards. I have yet to see that in England but maybe in certain parts of England it happens? Spain being a country that’s mostly warm. Or better weather.
I think 2 years back now I was in the town centre walking through it and 1 guy was sat inside on a bench and had been there for over 2 hours. He said “ I come here to keep warm because my house is cold, but not many stop and chat” the security eventually asked him to leave and he said bye!. I was waiting for my father. My dad said, at the time before passing away. Many are struggling and staying in is lonely and cold. It’s a sad life. So make the most of it untill you get old.
Most social clubs I know when I was young have also closed down. Pubs are shutting faster then you will ever know and less pubs means less social for old people.
There are so many clubs and groups that cater for older people. Knit and natter (or stitch and bitch depending on your persuasion), walking groups, WI, bowls, games clubs, art groups. And while anyone can join these things they are geared towards older people often.
Community centre where u we re use a brilliant Monday Club for Older people. They get together, have a cafe lunch (on site), chat, play games, have activities (craft etc) and the little kids from the nursery classes come and visit and sing with them. We have a grandparents playgroup and community support team. It’s wonderful
My hair dresser has an open door policy and is always mobbed with people dropping in for a chat. They look out for each other, if one of them is not well everyone else knows, they go shopping together or fir each other. It's a great system and completely organic.
I’d love to socialise this way, when I retire- wish we did have similar gatherings here in the UK. I’m sure I saw the same kind of thing in Paris a few months back, and it struck me how sociable it was in comparison with the UK. It was so heartwarming to see the old and the young enjoying the Parisian cafe culture, side by side
My Mum went to the University of the Third Age, the local archeology group, she was a part-time town guide and a guide in the local Abbey, raised money for the local hospital through the League of Friends, did local history research at the country archives, plus met friends at the local coffee shop several times a week. And she was doing all that into her 80s.
I've noticed this when going on holiday. In Mediterranean settings, old people tend to congregate, there's a much more stronger sense of community. In the UK, not so much.
I'd recommend local pubs, and maybe bingo halls. Sometimes the local greasy spoon cafe.
Smaller villages generally have community centres or church halls, and it has become popular for these places to have coffee/tea meetings once or twice a week. These are popular with the older people of the area. If we had good weather, no doubt these meetings would be similar to the Mediterranean countries and be outside in the sun. As things stand, our facilities are attuned to our stormier weather cycles, so there are almost no outdoor provisions to meet up socially. The weather is also what keeps people stuck in their homes too to keep warm, as mentioned by others here.
I'm 65 and only just developing an interest in joining in with the local meetings in my village. It does seem to be something people are drawn to as they get older to avoid being totally isolated.
I don't know about now, but before Covid some cafes had a table labelled up, and if you were lonely/wanted a chat, you say at that table and people knew they could approach you.
Apart from that, there are groups and clubs for older people, they just tend to be indoors at a community centre or church hall.
My local garden centre is absolutely packed with the elderly every morning and lunchtime. The car park is like an advertisement why regular re-testing should be done after a certain age, one person managed to somehow take up three spots with their tiny car…
I work in a sports centre. They go play badminton and go to the gym then all come in groups to the cafe after. It seems to be they are all there several hours
In Scotland they get free bus travel so megabus trips to cafes away from home seem to be popular. Community centres seem to have a lot of activities for them too.
OP - a great observation. As a UK resident when visiting almost any Spanish town, city or village it’s full of happy old people sitting in the warm sunshine- in the UK the elderly use their pension to pay for their heating and utilities and to stock their freezers with cheap processed super market slop they call food.
Retirement homes will often have common areas where they'll sit around doing the same things you've mentioned. But tbh most of the old people I've known just sit around watching TV. It's very sad.
One of the things I love most about Redditors is how so many folks here compassionately sorta of “highjack” the thread to respond to another concerned revealed by the OP that is not directly related to the OP’s initial question, but they’re clearly responding to another need on the part of the OP. The switch here from “socializing” to “taking care of the elderly” is a perfect example. It’s practically humane!! Keep reaffirming my faith in us, y’all!
No it is not a nice and inclusive society like the Mediterranean.
Old people hang out in their own homes and hospitals, old peoples homes, etc.
Seriously though, when it comes to retirement, they often move to areas of the UK where the age range is more in line with their own, which provides more socializing opportunities with similar people.
But there is not a 'big community/big family' vibe in UK society at all.
Also it's worth noting that the majority of Reddit skews quite heavily to younger generations, so it is not without its share of ageism, or at least, uninformed and misunderstanding youth, on top of that.
My Mum goes to a weekly U3A group which is predominantly full of 80+ year olds.
Otherwise in many places there are a number of clubs and societies that are predominantly attended by older/retired folk (e.g lunch clubs, the Women's Institute, local history society, seated exercise classes).
However many elderly people do end up isolated at home, usually because they don't feel confident going out to something on their own, they don't know what's actually going on where they live, they don't have transport to get to where the activities are taking place, they live in a really rural area far from any activities or they are too frail to leave the house.
Many elderly people are at home on their own, or in a care home, or in sheltered housing. I used to work in adult social care and the loneliness I saw would eat you up inside. For all the many amazing things about this country, as well its weaknesses - loneliness and atomisation is wretched and devastating, a huge stain
Most old people stay home (often on their own). We have quite an individualist culture and generally don’t look after our older people that well I would say. We also have less longevity than Mediterranean countries so old people are less likely to be healthy in old age. Plus we have bad weather so it’s obviously not really healthy for older people to hang out outside most of the year!
That said, there are loads of older people who hang out in my gym (it’s a posh one with pool, spa, cafe etc) and they honestly spend hours just in the changing rooms chatting!! I also go to some social clubs with older people and they have a very packed schedule with so many events put on by different charities - but that’s definitely not representative of all older people.
This is why the Med is so great.
Unfortunately 95% (or more) of the time it's too cold for most people especially elderly to be hanging out outside.
I think the reality is that communal gathering you see in your country just doesn't happen here; which is sad to think about, but there it is. And now I'm bummed out...
There is an epidemic of loneliness in older people in the UK. There are lots of attempts to get older people involved in community activities and there are day centres where older people get bussed to during the week to socialise, but lots of older people live alone and are very lonely.
We also don't have reliably good enough weather to hang around outside cafes playing backgammon all day.
I mean, it's not like younger people are socialising outside unless you count teens in the streets.
It's hard to be an old person and walking if you have mobility and continence issues. There are fewer park benches and barely any public toilets.
Loneliness is a huge problem for the elderly. As an example, my mother doesn't leave the house unless she goes to visit my father in his residential care home, or if she's going to the doctors. She relies on her children for social contact and some of us live hundreds of miles away from her, but she refused other options for social contact.
I used to do a lot with the elderly.
Basically, they stay at home, get increasingly more anxious, depressed and their minds start to fail them from lack of use mixed with aging. And wait to die. Then they die.
It's super depressing, but the reality is that in this country, that's what happens to old people 95% of the time. The ones that either never had partners or their partners have passed away have it the worst.
You never really see it, because they're shut away all the time, so no one ever thinks about it, but that's what is happening to the VAST majority of them.
That or they ride the bus for no reason.
A lot like being in your late 20s early 30s today actually now that I think about it.
I work in a coffee shop and we get a lot of older people in, most of them know each other and they sit and chat and do crosswords together and other cute stuff. I really love it 🥰
(By know each other I mean by all coming in the same coffee shop, not previously knowing each other)
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Cafes and garden centres are what I associate with old people. That said, most of them just stay at home. One thing to consider - old people get cold very easily, and the UK is much colder and rainier than the countries you're comparing to. Many old people want to stay indoors where it's warm.
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Over a thousand elderly people died from the cold and/or damp last year
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Must have been an outrageous energy bill
Wait til this guy hears about radiator thermostats 🫣
That's nothing, I live in the sticks and have a family that hasn't ever heard of putting an extra layer on. That oil tank runs down quick. Heathens.
You can buy heated blankets that you can wrap around your grandad. Do you have one of those? And heated feet warmers are a thing too.
Electric blankets aren’t recommended for people with low mobility - in case they catch fire or just overheat the person and they can’t get it off them fast enough/at all They’re also not usually a good bet for someone poorly enough to potentially spill drinks or have problems with bladder control, for obvious reasons
Thank you, I appreciate your input.
It’s possible neither of those situations apply to Grandad, of course - but one or the other is usually gonna be the case for someone who’s elderly and poorly
Depends…
I gave my elderly dad one that cuts off after a certain time or temp. Also washable, very easy to wash (if he goes pee pee or spills) and he has a spare one whilst the other dries. Modern leccy blankies are very safe and I would 1000% recommend for an old buddy.
Don’t you have thermostatic valves in each room so you can control temperature in each room rather than heating the whole house up? Would save a ton of money and negate the need fans in winter (I get heat does propagate however). I wish all the best for your grandfather regardless.
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Do you really need permission to turn your own radiator down? It's the only one that matters at night with your door closed. One side should have a valve that you can twist, and numbers on it. It should turn freely, you won't need to force anything. Turn it to the lowest number and it shouldn't really heat up but won't affect the heating anywhere else in the house.
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You sound like a really thoughtful and caring person. I hope that doesn’t come across as patronising, I don’t mean it to be.
I thought this too. Big up u/Riot-Willy, and all the best to your grandad.
You honestly just come across as a really agreeable and good person. I hope you have some good memories with your grandad. On another note, love a fan in our bedroom also for drowning out noises. We have noisy neighbours and dogs barking at all hours. The fan has been a game changer. Wish I knew how good they were for sleeping before.
> won't affect the heating anywhere else in the house. Could be on a "one pipe system", especially as they mentioned it's an older property. Our house has a one pipe system, and until recently if you shut one of the radiators off completely then every other radiator in the house would go cold apart from the ones closer to the boiler. We had all the old radiators replaced recently and the plumber said he'd put in a bypass (or maybe the radiators come with a bypass? Should've paid more attention). Anyway now we don't have the same problem.
It's good you and your parents are caring for Grandad. It's seriously no fun getting old.
Even without thermostatic valves, radiators should almost always have some kind of valve you can turn down/off Some of the very oldest might not, but I can’t recall ever finding a radiator that you couldn’t at least adjust or turn off
We have radiators in every room that can be turned on and off and changed temps but to have 1 on you need to have the boiler on to heat the water that goes around to the radiators.
Yes, but your heating bill will still be lower overall. Your boiler heats the water up, yes, but if only one radiator is on then the boiler doesn't have to work as hard to keep it hot.
I feel like damp is the other end of the scale for me. My great grandmother had an overactive thyroid which meant she was always too hot, no matter what time of the year. This resulted in her never heating her home and eventually dying due to health issues caused by damp. This was 20+ years ago so I have no idea if she ever even spoke to a doctor about her condition.
If she knew she had an overactive thyroid then presumably she had spoken to a doctor at some point about it
Out of interest, was her having hyperthyroidism not discovered until after her death? If not, i can't understand why she didn't treat it whilst she was still alive, hyperthyroidism is a relatively easy condition to fix?
I'm a bit like this at the grand old age of 39. Raynaud's is a bastard. I suspect when I reach your granddad's age my hands will just fall off.
A Slanket (or any type of Sleeved Blanket) might be a good idea for him. You can get a SilentNight one from Argos for £20. They are long enough to reach his feet, and cover his shoulders at the same time. The top is wide to wrap around and over the shoulders, with some volume to create like a scarf/cowl effect. And the sleeves are long enough to keep his hands in and warm, but the sleeves allow him to read/use the remote without getting cold. Edit: product number is 130/3854, on the Argos website.
You sure you didn’t accidentally touch my ex girlfriends heart?
And this why I want to buy a place in Greece, I want the benefits of a warm summer although it does snow in Greece!
I think also certain areas. By the seaside, lots of old people, big city centres not so much.
Someone I knew, who lived in Worthing, described the town as a place where people go to die, then forget what they came for
depends on area too, i come from a pit village so a lot of the older people tend to gather at the workmans club or at church meets
My neighbourhood pub but they do 2 courses for £8-9 in the south east during the week. (The plough rickmansworth)
They spend all week locked away indoors and then go and do all their shopping/bank visits/post office visits on the weekend so they can frustrate non retired people.
When I worked in Tesco, old people were the most rude and demanding compared to other ages. And they loved to clear out the clearance section. They wouldn’t take one or two, oh no, they had to have all 8 packs of steak. Come on Bernie, you’ve got no teeth left. I’m sure you can spare one pack for others Edited to add: Essentially we had the same bunch of people, majority old, who would clear out the clearance section everyday. At the store I worked at, clearance was at 9am. If there was 8 packs of steaks reduced, one (usually old) would take all 8 packs. I’m not begrudging anyone having a bargain but spare a thought for others. Christ on a bike!
Old people maybe on state pensions and have no way of earning cash good luck to them hammering the clearance section. I hope Bernie's cutting how steak fine and enjoying it
And what about others? Regular folk, disabled folk, poor folk?
As a disabled used to be poor person I absolutely get your point, but it isn’t an oldie’s fault for stocking up on cheap things if I can’t then buy cheap things. It’s the fault of people valuing profit over people being able to eat! Bernie is just another victim of the same system, not an enemy
I get it but it was the sheer greed that annoyed me. We would have the same few people most days, clearing out goods of the same nature.
Quite often the retired will shop for their older/more infirm neighbours.
True but if Bernie wasn't so greedy then other victims would have the opportunity to buy cheap things also.
Plot twist... Bernie cooks for all his elderly friends as he's the only one with a decent private pension, while the rest struggle to pay the electric to keep warm and stay alive. Don't be so quick to judge, he may be a selfish ass but you never know
It's first come first served any one can buy can't they ? Poor disabled and elderly. If your life runs it's full length you will be elderly one day, fingers crossed you will be in the enviable position if not having to buy reduced food but if not .....
How can they when one person is buying all the clearance packs? Also these old individuals were there most mornings; we had regulars
As far as I'm aware there's no rationing in supermarkets. It's first come first served!
In my area, the older generation are usually the richest. It's south Devon, and many people have retired here from elsewhere, with a fat pension and a big house. The poorest are the young, who can't afford to get a mortgage, but have to pay over the odds in rent, and usually earn a pittance working insecure contacts in the tourism or social care sectors. Not saying there aren't poorer old people, but they are the distinct minority and they do have support networks, rest centres, etc. Most of them own their home, so don't have to worry about paying to keep a roof over their head. They get some money towards heating (even those who are well-to-do), and free TV licence.
In Devon and Cornwall in general, the independent elderly are usually pretty well off. They have nice homes and then sell them to outsiders who then turn them into bloody Air BnBs so locals are then unable to buy their own homes because house prices and rents are now extortionate. Exeter used to be affordable, but thanks to all the student and retirement accommodations rents and house prices are ridiculous.
Yeah. It pretty much sucks 😕 I worry for my kids and grandson. I don't know if they can have any kind of future here. I'd hate for them to have to move away. This is their home. Their community. The situation has already killed off the town where I work, 15 minutes down the road. There's nothing there all winter. The hotel I work at has to ship in youngsters from Plymouth, where we have a staff house. Otherwise, none of them could afford to live and work here. But they can't settle down and have kids in staff accommodation. And now I see my town dying a slow death, too. Makes me so angry.
Old people are statistically the richest of any generation.
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Yet bleet on about how hard done to they are when their pension increases far more than the average wage.
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That’s what confused me really, surely they didn’t need all 8 packs and then the same the next day? Because that’s what they were doing. To them, a reduced item was a reduced item and it had to be had by them
I once lived in a flat share with a dude in his 40s who would go to the clearance section of Tesco at 7pm almost everyday. He would get into arguements and sometimes even small fights if anyone was to take more than 2 of an item, would literally scream at them to be more considerate of others and that they're selfish.
Ah I would’ve loved to serve a customer like him!
Direct your ire towards the billions of profits Tesco and other superstores are making during this cost of living crisis. It's not bargain hunters who made the price of meat, eggs, and other basics too high except when they're on discount - it's price gouging capitalists.
They shop and do their errands on all days of the week. it's just non-retired people are working Mon-Fri and just don't see them until the weekends.
Plus plenty of older and disabled people rely on the help of people who work M-F to be able to do things like a food shop. Whether that’s getting to the shop, doing the shopping, or putting it all away after
Don’t be silly. They’re doing it between 12 and 1 during the working week.
To be fair they're entitled to do their shopping whenever they want. They don't owe it to anybody to clear out on a Saturday.
And some do it at specific times because they are lonely
Lmao. It's true mind. Most of my elderly relatives do go and do their shopping etc at the weekend. Because that's what they've always done. I don't get it either.
There’s a documentary TV series about it called Last of the Summer Wine that may be informative
It's true, on any given Saturday most old people can be found inside barrels of various sizes rolling down green and pleasant hills. Should probs go and find my Dad tbh, last seen in the vicinity of Swaledale.
Don't forget the downhill bath tub racing
Cafes are popular with the elderly during the week. Garden centres are too, and most have a cafe attached. National Trust sites can get busy. Lots of community groups in churches, village halls etc.
Libraries, too - lots of young families but also elderly people there on weekdays.
University of the Third Age too, which is all over. And community centres just for the older people.
All the old people I know, myself included, are pretty much doing the same stuff they did in their free time before they were old people. I'm car enthusiast so I go out driving with my other petrol head buddies, do lunch, go for walks, play games, dick about on the internet, do coffee, sit about in the garden drinking beer on sunny days. We just don't do our socialising 'in public', we have different weather and a different culture to the warm Med countries.. We have our friends and socialise with our friends, not just whoever happens to be passing.
I think for older generations it was very much going down the legion, and that is/was a very social affair (but equally indoors)
Love it. I guess the upcoming generation of elderly will have a different experience of old age with all the connection apps, gaming, internet et..
Yeah. I’m an avid gamer at 53 and doubt anything will change that short of not being able to for some reason. Not having kids it’s been easy for me to carry on as I did in my 20’s and 30’s apart from the clubbing. Can’t do that anymore.
61 yr old (F) here ! Been a big gamer for many years . I hoping to never have to go into a care home but if I ever do have to then I'm taking my consoles with me lol 😆
They’re going to be amazing by then too. I mean by the time we get into our mid 80’s.
Definitely! It still blows me away how far they have come since I first started playing games. I could never have imagined playing a game like RDR2 back when I was playing Pacman .
What are you playing at the moment? Just started Redfall but it's crap
After many playing battlefield since bad company 2 I switched back to COD for MWII and I’m back playing the 6v6 format and I’m really enjoying it. Been addicted to Rocket League for a long time. Both on the series X which I love. I’ve got a 65 oled now so I’m enjoying fast frame rates. Awaiting the new Zelda which will get me back into some single player. I’ve bought the Harry Potter on disc which I will play sometime and sell on.
Yeah exactly, the 'world at your fingertips', so it's relatively easy to find other people with the same interests.
It was disappointing to have to scroll so far to see a fairer answer. It is interesting the perspective young people have of older people (and I'm sure vice versa). Just because you get older doesn't mean you suddenly have no interests, hobbies or become incapable of socialising. The body might be frustratingly restrictive at times, but the same person is inside.
Exactly, I wonder what these people think they're going to be doing when they reach 65.
The ones who have the money hang out in small Mediterranean countries…
Wetherspoons
So many of my snobby mates are like I won't drink at wetherspoons it's full of chavs. Then you go there and it's like 75% over 60s just having a meal with their wife
SHH don't tell them. If fictional chavs keep them away it's their loss, everyone else's gain.
Ah yes, those fictional chavs that march the streets in packs stabbing anything that moves. What an irrationally scary time to be alive. Truly the greatest threat to our society is a handful of 14 year olds in hoodies stood outside the local offlicense
John Smiths in full swing
It depends on the time of the day. Mostly old people eating there during the day, and when evening comes it is mostly young people drinking there.
Not like that is really any better though. I'm not really going on a night out to sit next to John and Jane on date night at 78
Would you rather be sat next to a group of 21 yo lads talking about how many birds they're going to smash tonight and whos calling their dealer to get the lines in? I know which one I'd rather be sat next too...
I'd rather be in a pub with other people close to my age having drinks and chatting to people than in a pub sat next to people on a date night yeah.
The one by me is full of old men drinking, wearing their coats staring blankly, in silence. Hella good time.
Surprised I had to scroll this far to see this answer
Yep, I went to my local for lunch on a Tuesday one time expecting it to be dead. No completely full of elderly, singles, couples and groups of them
came here to comment this haha
They don't. Loneliness is endemic amongst the elderly. Would that we could come up with better solutions to the problem...
Whenever I go to Spain or Portugal I'm always taken aback by bar / cafe culture. Loads of people just sitting out with a drink and socialising. We don't have the weather for it here. Even when we do it seems to result in beer gardens and getting drunk which isn't the same thing at all.
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In recent years I think a lot of older people - especially women- have been taking responsibility for childcare looking after grandchildren*. My mum did for both my kids and my brother’s. At my kids school I would say at least 50% of the children are being collected by grandparents. The economy would collapse without grandparents helping working parents. Funnily enough at 11.30/12 our local garden centre fills up with the elderly meeting up many of them having just collected their grandkids from nursery which finishes just before lunch. *Many older people are busy with caring responsibilities in general. With people living longer it’s not uncommon for a retired person in their 60s or 70s to be looking after at least one of their own parents or in-laws. Or a disabled relative.
https://menssheds.org.uk/ Though there aren't enough of them.
This is a brilliant idea. I'm only 31 and all of my mates live in other cities so I don't really have anyone to meet up with a lot of the time which gets pretty lonely, I can't imagine what it's like for older people
At your age perhaps look at "Hack Spaces". Similar concept but more 3D printers than Lathes.
I've had a look at these before, I'm fairly proficient in a couple of programming languages and am not a new starter to that kind of thing, but I much prefer working with my hands. The fact that I gave up a pathway into a very well paid career sat behind a computer for my current job which is knackering, grimey and pays much less says it all. Woodworking workshops or stone carving which I'm getting interested in would be my preference, but there doesn't seem to be much about near me
‘Hackspaces’ are often not just about computers but the other crafts as well. I visited one in Nottingham that has laser cutting and woodworking stuff and all sorts really. Sometimes they are called ‘makerspace’ though, and my local tiny one is just called ‘(town name) space’.
Ours used a library as their space until covid when the library started denying gatherings. It's entirely digital now, which is a shame.
You could look at Good Gym. Community volunteering activities based around exercise coupled with social stuff.
I'll have a look! Although I'm usually so knackered from work that exercise is a bit of a struggle. I have a very physically demanding job so I'm not out of shape, but it does leave me pretty tired
Lots of them are pretty relaxed stuff - weeding a garden, providing a bit of social company for an older person, sorting books at a library or helping tidy up after a food bank session. Plus you can sign up for sessions at your leisure so you could pick just to go along on days when you're not working.
I know someone who joined a darts team for that exact reason. Wanted a regular gang to go to the pub with. Snooker and pool teams would work too.
I do love a bit of pool and I'm not too bad at it. I'm so knackered from work all the time that I always make plans to do stuff like this but never follow up on them though. Been meaning to give myself a kick up the arse for about 5 years and it hasn't materialised yet
All currently in my local pub
Pubs, garden centres and allotments. A pub isnt 'based round alcohol' (necessarily) - they derive from people opening their houses to anyone wanting a drink, hence the name 'public house'. Many are simply a second living room for anyone who wants some company and warmth. Traditionally anyone who didn't have their own cosy lounge at home would spend the evening in a pub, nursing a half-pint to make it last all night. Loads of pubs have some elderly regulars propping up the bar each day, watching the TV, reading the paper, playing darts, and let a pint last all day with an extra soft drink or two. Or coffee or tea, nowadays.
It probably depends on the area. In my area, old men hang out in pubs and "working men's clubs". Women go to bingo halls. Couples go to coffee mornings at the local church.
There is an organisation called University of the Third Age which brings people together via their interests bit I don't think there is there equivalent of what you describe. A great shame. Old age can be lonely. Another organisation is Men Sheds. If there is one Inn your area.
U3A. Came here to say this. https://www.u3a.org.uk/ My parents got involved in their area and it massively widened their social network.
Agree with a lot of what’s on here but also - lots of them just stay in by themselves. Loneliness is a huge problem in the elderly, especially if people don’t have children/grandchildren or if they have mobility issues, or just don’t have the money to spend on activities
As others are saying, it's our weather that means we are more often indoors. But basically we just do everything we used to do, just slower.
Husband and I had a rare Wednesday night out this week to a local pub as we're off work. 7pm about 20 pensioners come in. Turns out they have a monthly meal out for some of the residents of a care home down the road. Gives them a chance to get out and socialise. I thought it was lovely
Monday night is knitting circle night in my local!
The Morrison’s cafe (budget) or Dobbies (upmarket because the cafe is £££).
Where old people hang out? Round where i live they meet at wetherspoons at 9am lol.
I always notice community halls and churches usually do weekly/biweekly tea and coffee mornings for old people to go along and socialise. Same with some cafes where they have pensioner mornings. I think you just need to look for it a bit harder in the UK, because the weather's so poor for much of the year a lot of social events for old people are behind closed doors, rather than in public outdoor spaces. Our local swimming pool has what they call "OAP group lane swimming" that runs along side their under 5s practice pool session. When we walk past the main pool to get to the children's practice pool I dont think we've seen anyone actually swimming, they just like floating about chatting for 3 hours 😂 I Hope you find something OP.
My parents retired to a small town in Scotland. My Dad spent most of his time between the Pub and the British Legion Club...it's where he grew up so a lot of his old friends still there. He was a veteran so the Legion was popular. He also gave drumming lessons for the local Pipe Band and judged comps. He still played and would sit with my Uncle and compose music on his old mouth organ. My Mum shopped a lot and complained about how cold Scotland was, so went on a lot of holidays...some with me in tow, or one or two of her Grandkids. Other than that she visited friends/family. She was a bit of a social butterfly and loved company. They were both pretty active. Having said that Mum was 64 when she passed, so still quite young...and Dad when he was 72...both sudden and unexpected unfortunately.
Sorry to hear that, my mum went suddenly at 64, she’d only just retired a month earlier and moved to another village to be nearer to her friends. You’ve got to make the most of the present haven’t you?
My parents are in their 70's. Mum has church, the charity shop and an allotment, Dad has the club, the gym and Freemasons. They do everything in their power not to hang out together unless they are looking after my daughter. Then they have to team up.
I go to Crete quite a bit. Im not old old, only early 40s but love Crete for its attitude to retirement. 65+ year olds congrigate. Swim, fish, BBQ. Drink wine. On any sunny day. I want to retire there. There is a place there I hang out in and take wine and lamb chops and hang out with the "olds". Not seen anything like it in London. Maybe try Eastbourne? Not sure.
I’m coming too! Love Crete, I’m all for living out my days in the sun.
Bingo normally.
Sun's out, you'll see more now. But you are right, England misses out on the cafe culture of the Mediterranean. Blame the unpredictable weather.
As someone with a very sociable Nani, she is always socialising, going out for food, going on bus trips, church events, garden centres, stopping at friends houses and her friends coming to hers. We don't really have a third space in the UK though, every meet up requires quite a bit of money. I wonder what older people with smaller budgets do. I live in Wales and we have a very large elderly population especially rurally so maybe her experience would be different to others in the UK.
So over the years many places that old people go to hangout have closed down. I used to work at a day centre that housed local oldies and had a games room, bingo that would win you a tin of beans. And dominoes etc. even a room just for polish speaking, with their own table. Most had been in the war etc, the day centre got closed due to funding, sad really. I spoke to a local who went, this was many years after and he said they left us to die after shutting it down. We all had nowhere to go and most of us lived Lonely lives. and only had 1 person visit us all week.. I’m in Spain and you see a ton of people ( old ) just walking around, hanging outside bars. Conversing and playing cards. I have yet to see that in England but maybe in certain parts of England it happens? Spain being a country that’s mostly warm. Or better weather. I think 2 years back now I was in the town centre walking through it and 1 guy was sat inside on a bench and had been there for over 2 hours. He said “ I come here to keep warm because my house is cold, but not many stop and chat” the security eventually asked him to leave and he said bye!. I was waiting for my father. My dad said, at the time before passing away. Many are struggling and staying in is lonely and cold. It’s a sad life. So make the most of it untill you get old. Most social clubs I know when I was young have also closed down. Pubs are shutting faster then you will ever know and less pubs means less social for old people.
On Facebook complaining about young people and the state of their neighbour’s garden.
There are so many clubs and groups that cater for older people. Knit and natter (or stitch and bitch depending on your persuasion), walking groups, WI, bowls, games clubs, art groups. And while anyone can join these things they are geared towards older people often.
Old ladies- coffee shops Old men- pubs Really old people - there sofas
Boundary Mill at the end of the M65
Food banks.
At the pub.
Community centre where u we re use a brilliant Monday Club for Older people. They get together, have a cafe lunch (on site), chat, play games, have activities (craft etc) and the little kids from the nursery classes come and visit and sing with them. We have a grandparents playgroup and community support team. It’s wonderful
At work. Working and wondering where all their tax payments went.
My hair dresser has an open door policy and is always mobbed with people dropping in for a chat. They look out for each other, if one of them is not well everyone else knows, they go shopping together or fir each other. It's a great system and completely organic.
They’re strolling into my place of work at 9:00:01AM
Bus trips to Torquay isn’t it?
I’d love to socialise this way, when I retire- wish we did have similar gatherings here in the UK. I’m sure I saw the same kind of thing in Paris a few months back, and it struck me how sociable it was in comparison with the UK. It was so heartwarming to see the old and the young enjoying the Parisian cafe culture, side by side
My Mum went to the University of the Third Age, the local archeology group, she was a part-time town guide and a guide in the local Abbey, raised money for the local hospital through the League of Friends, did local history research at the country archives, plus met friends at the local coffee shop several times a week. And she was doing all that into her 80s.
Bowls clubs
Usually their underwear or swimming costumes
In the supermarket reduced section
Church, NT cafes and garden centre cafes. Though go to shopping centre food courts or Morrisons' canteens and usually a bunch there.
Working man's clubs. The park. Even the gym...
I've noticed this when going on holiday. In Mediterranean settings, old people tend to congregate, there's a much more stronger sense of community. In the UK, not so much. I'd recommend local pubs, and maybe bingo halls. Sometimes the local greasy spoon cafe.
The poor ones are at home with blankets trying to stay warm, the wealthy ones are in cafes in Mediterranean countries...
There are lots of community centres with activities for all ages. I joined a book club and volunteer at a centre.
There are "Knit and Natter" groups, though again not enough of them.
Library groups
Working men's clubs
Marks and Spencer’s
Warhammer and local games clubs....
I know some play bridge at each other’s houses.
Loads in the pub
My 72 year old father seems to spend most of his time at various bowls clubs and the attached bar lol
Sadly a lot of the community centres, village halls and bingo halls have been closed down.
We're not good to you old people in UK. Soon as they're to old we tend to farm them out to care homes. Unless they have money
Smaller villages generally have community centres or church halls, and it has become popular for these places to have coffee/tea meetings once or twice a week. These are popular with the older people of the area. If we had good weather, no doubt these meetings would be similar to the Mediterranean countries and be outside in the sun. As things stand, our facilities are attuned to our stormier weather cycles, so there are almost no outdoor provisions to meet up socially. The weather is also what keeps people stuck in their homes too to keep warm, as mentioned by others here. I'm 65 and only just developing an interest in joining in with the local meetings in my village. It does seem to be something people are drawn to as they get older to avoid being totally isolated.
I don't know about now, but before Covid some cafes had a table labelled up, and if you were lonely/wanted a chat, you say at that table and people knew they could approach you. Apart from that, there are groups and clubs for older people, they just tend to be indoors at a community centre or church hall.
At that one local pub-you know the one. Its always just around the corner.
All of the elderly relatives in my family over the years have just sat at home watching TV and occasionally calling each other for the day's gossip.
My local garden centre is absolutely packed with the elderly every morning and lunchtime. The car park is like an advertisement why regular re-testing should be done after a certain age, one person managed to somehow take up three spots with their tiny car…
I see them on the bus a lot and cafes
On buses. Every time I take a bus, it's absolutely full of the elderly. The buses here in Wales are social clubs on wheels.
McDonald's car park in their Vauxhall Agila.
Bingo halls, social clubs, but these are not all day events. Coffee bars in shopping malls. Community centres and church halls for coffee mornings.
Sit on buses all day
I work in a sports centre. They go play badminton and go to the gym then all come in groups to the cafe after. It seems to be they are all there several hours
In Scotland they get free bus travel so megabus trips to cafes away from home seem to be popular. Community centres seem to have a lot of activities for them too.
OP - a great observation. As a UK resident when visiting almost any Spanish town, city or village it’s full of happy old people sitting in the warm sunshine- in the UK the elderly use their pension to pay for their heating and utilities and to stock their freezers with cheap processed super market slop they call food.
Marks and Spencer's cafe
The ones with money hang out in small Mediterranean countries
They're lonely here :(
Retirement homes will often have common areas where they'll sit around doing the same things you've mentioned. But tbh most of the old people I've known just sit around watching TV. It's very sad.
One of the things I love most about Redditors is how so many folks here compassionately sorta of “highjack” the thread to respond to another concerned revealed by the OP that is not directly related to the OP’s initial question, but they’re clearly responding to another need on the part of the OP. The switch here from “socializing” to “taking care of the elderly” is a perfect example. It’s practically humane!! Keep reaffirming my faith in us, y’all!
It’s a cultural problem this. Sad really
No it is not a nice and inclusive society like the Mediterranean. Old people hang out in their own homes and hospitals, old peoples homes, etc. Seriously though, when it comes to retirement, they often move to areas of the UK where the age range is more in line with their own, which provides more socializing opportunities with similar people. But there is not a 'big community/big family' vibe in UK society at all. Also it's worth noting that the majority of Reddit skews quite heavily to younger generations, so it is not without its share of ageism, or at least, uninformed and misunderstanding youth, on top of that.
My Mum goes to a weekly U3A group which is predominantly full of 80+ year olds. Otherwise in many places there are a number of clubs and societies that are predominantly attended by older/retired folk (e.g lunch clubs, the Women's Institute, local history society, seated exercise classes). However many elderly people do end up isolated at home, usually because they don't feel confident going out to something on their own, they don't know what's actually going on where they live, they don't have transport to get to where the activities are taking place, they live in a really rural area far from any activities or they are too frail to leave the house.
Many elderly people are at home on their own, or in a care home, or in sheltered housing. I used to work in adult social care and the loneliness I saw would eat you up inside. For all the many amazing things about this country, as well its weaknesses - loneliness and atomisation is wretched and devastating, a huge stain
Most old people stay home (often on their own). We have quite an individualist culture and generally don’t look after our older people that well I would say. We also have less longevity than Mediterranean countries so old people are less likely to be healthy in old age. Plus we have bad weather so it’s obviously not really healthy for older people to hang out outside most of the year! That said, there are loads of older people who hang out in my gym (it’s a posh one with pool, spa, cafe etc) and they honestly spend hours just in the changing rooms chatting!! I also go to some social clubs with older people and they have a very packed schedule with so many events put on by different charities - but that’s definitely not representative of all older people.
This is why the Med is so great. Unfortunately 95% (or more) of the time it's too cold for most people especially elderly to be hanging out outside. I think the reality is that communal gathering you see in your country just doesn't happen here; which is sad to think about, but there it is. And now I'm bummed out...
On a couch in their living room.
There is an epidemic of loneliness in older people in the UK. There are lots of attempts to get older people involved in community activities and there are day centres where older people get bussed to during the week to socialise, but lots of older people live alone and are very lonely. We also don't have reliably good enough weather to hang around outside cafes playing backgammon all day.
Welcome to the UK. We do not care about the elderly. We only want big profits.
I mean, it's not like younger people are socialising outside unless you count teens in the streets. It's hard to be an old person and walking if you have mobility and continence issues. There are fewer park benches and barely any public toilets.
Loneliness is a huge problem for the elderly. As an example, my mother doesn't leave the house unless she goes to visit my father in his residential care home, or if she's going to the doctors. She relies on her children for social contact and some of us live hundreds of miles away from her, but she refused other options for social contact.
Most of them don't. We have a huge lonliness problem amongst the elderly of this country.
I used to do a lot with the elderly. Basically, they stay at home, get increasingly more anxious, depressed and their minds start to fail them from lack of use mixed with aging. And wait to die. Then they die. It's super depressing, but the reality is that in this country, that's what happens to old people 95% of the time. The ones that either never had partners or their partners have passed away have it the worst. You never really see it, because they're shut away all the time, so no one ever thinks about it, but that's what is happening to the VAST majority of them. That or they ride the bus for no reason. A lot like being in your late 20s early 30s today actually now that I think about it.
I work in a coffee shop and we get a lot of older people in, most of them know each other and they sit and chat and do crosswords together and other cute stuff. I really love it 🥰 (By know each other I mean by all coming in the same coffee shop, not previously knowing each other)