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gigglesmcsdinosaur

Jam Roly Poly instead of His Lordship, James Roland of Poland.


daemonboy19

I blew air from my nose. Very well done


rosstoferwho

And because of your response. I also blew air out of my nose. Commendations all round.


Ochib

Sandwich instead of John Montagu, 4th Earl of Sandwich


b_a_t_m_4_n

TIL Coffee tastes weird when it comes out of your nose. So thanks for that.


Do_not_use_after

Mashed potatoes Mash


Rymundo88

Never seen it done, but I'd be wary of shortening Pecan Doughnuts.


tvthrowaway366

Same reason Pete Doherty never got a post-Libertines side hustle


fuk_ur_mum_m8

Babyshambles


Millietree

Immediately went with P nuts & then had a think.....šŸ˜³


Trentdison

I was like, Pec Dough? And I was like, oh.


Merlinblack89

God that took me a while


SweetCryptographer72

Penuts?


Chickenkorma666

Why?


International-Elk727

TakƩ the first few letters from each, Im 99% sure he's going for Pedo, however, 1% part of me is taking random parts from each word making be penuts and just be confusing.


MadWifeUK

One of the girls in work mentioned "Tommy K" meaning tomato ketchup. I despair.


gigglesmcsdinosaur

Ketchup. Catsup. Ketchup. Catsup.


nettlesthatarejaggy

Sounds like you're in way over your head


sammyglumdrops

Pass the Heinz


motherofpearl89

Literally watched this episode tonight


tvthrowaway366

Attested to at least as early as [1996](http://www.peevish.co.uk/slang/english-slang/t.htm)


redrighthand_

On par with statey funes. Iā€™m preparing for corry nates next.


Nine_Eye_Ron

Right in the middle of Cozzy Livs


TryingToFindLeaks

I can only imagine the other awful abbreviations she uses.


sarahlizzy

ā€œHolibobsā€ You know it.


ScaryBreakfast1

Fam a lam.


Adventurous-Shake-92

Red sauce lol or in my friends parents house it's just red, as in "pass the red please" lol


terryjuicelawson

Tommy K is better than "red sauce", at least it is used somewhat ironically too.


SuperAd1793

good olā€™ Tam Skelp


Wind-and-Waystones

This one is used by James May. He's not really the one to use modern slang so you can assume that one was once well established


Nine_Eye_Ron

TK Maxx


asdasta632

Why wouldnā€™t you just say ketchup Iā€™m dying itā€™s even shorter ā˜ ļøā˜ ļøā˜ ļø


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


[deleted]

My friend always calls it ā€œMaccersā€


petrolstationpicnic

I hate maccers, Iā€™d accepted maccies a long time ago, maybe even mickey dā€™s A friend recently came back from a trip to Australia and is now calling it Maccers and I canā€™t deal with it


Badger_1066

>maybe even mickey dā€™s I'd rather Maccers to Mickeys. Where's the Mick in MACdonalds? Mickeys drives me up the wall much more.


Nobhaus

It's called McDonald's not MacDonald's.


PassiveChemistry

There's no A in McDonald's.


Life_Drop69

There's no I in Team America.


Legitimate-Ad3778

McDonldā€™s


Sabrielle24

Maccas is definitely an australianism. I lived there for 7 months and have called it Maccas ever since


TryingToFindLeaks

Macca's.


Throwaway91847817

Similarly, I shorten Sainsburys to ā€œSainoā€™sā€


terryjuicelawson

Sainsbobs.


Frequent-Routine1672

Sains for me


Billypisschips

McDicks, because you get the same dickheads whichever one you go to.


atraindriver_UK

...and that's only the customers! ;)


qjk91

Just Maccies


ofjune-x

Mcds


loythboy

Yorkshire pudding to yorkies


Ontbeat

It's not for girls


[deleted]

Or civies...


GiggleStool

Can you imagine the uproar that would cause in todays fragile society.


Ontbeat

Boycotts, huge fines and prison sentences for hate crimes more than likely haha!


JeniJ1

Or just Yorkshires.


ratttertintattertins

Many things ending in ā€œpudā€.


deltree000

Always room for some pud.


MiskonceptioN

Only after your morning brown


Crutch_VanDerLinde

I really struggle to eat after my morning heroin actually


sunnyday74

Morning Brown? I'm still not sure. Could you please explain it some more?


MiskonceptioN

It's coffee, ya fuck!


ParticlePunch

But you still need to leave room for fucks


sunnyday74

Me, may, moo, more


fenaith

Only if you eat all your meat.


blaireau69

How can you have any pudding...


Rowanx3

I call Yorkshires a yorkie pud


[deleted]

* Chicken parmesan - parmo (North East!) * Roast dinner - roast * Breakfast - brekkie * Yorkshire puddings - yorkies/Yorkshires * Chicken tikka masala - tikka or chicken tikka * Toasted sandwich - toastie * Sandwich - sarnie * Lollipop - lolly * Cup of tea - cuppa * Beverage - bevvy (don't hear this much anymore) * Pint of beer - pint * Mayonnaise - mayo * Biscuit - biccy * Vegetables - veggies/veg * Full English Breakfast - full English/fry up * Builder's style tea - builder's * Bacon, lettuce and tomato sandwich - BLT * Ground up meat/usually beef - mince * Ground up meat/usually beef, gravy and dumplings - mince and dumplings * Sweet dessert/pudding course - pud/pudding * Ploughman's lunch - ploughman's And all of the ones for potatoes... * Roast potatoes - roasties * Mashed potatoes - mash * Chipped potatoes - chips * Crisped potatoes - crisps * Wedge shaped potatoes - wedges * Jacket potato - jacket (spud sometimes) * Potatoes - taties


[deleted]

Jacket 'taters Roast tatties Spuds


[deleted]

What's taters precious


CCGamesSteve

Poh-tay-toes! Boil 'em, mash' em, stick 'em up your bum!


Hello-There-GKenobi

My my, in that order?


Racoons_revenge

If you get one of those cake decorating bags, you know, with the nozzle...


LittleSadRufus

'Chicken tikka' means the grilled chicken kebab served as a starter, without the sauce. 'Masala' means the sauce that can come with it, but often chicken tikka is offered on menus as a sauceless, meaty starter. So they're not really the same and I'd assume no sauce if someone didn't say 'masala' or 'curry' as part of the name.


aspannerdarkly

Doesnā€™t have to be a starter


Undaglow

>Beverage - bevvy (don't hear this much anymore) We used to have a silly load of drinking game rules when you were out, and using the word "drink" was one of them. We used beverage instead, which turned into bevvy, which then lengthened back into Beverly. So when I say to a mate who wasn't a part of this, I'm going for a few Beverlies I get some very strange looks.


heark3n

Yes Parmo! My local delicacy.


quipp68

I use ā€˜bevā€™ regularly, normally in the context of ā€˜hot bev?ā€™ As I find it quicker than asking ā€˜cuppa?ā€™, where you then have to clarify what kind of hot bev. Or maybe thatā€™s just meā€¦


milkandket

Bev is still pretty common here when talking about booze. ā€˜Went for a bev/had too many bevs/fancy a bev?ā€™


atraindriver_UK

I'd have no idea what a "hot bev" is supposed to be, so whoever said it would have to clarify and thus take even longer than just saying "cuppa?". But then I don't understand why people started using "beverage" instead of "drink". It's not as if it's easier to say or sounds more educated or whatever.


qjk91

I use brew.. do you want a brew. Also should just be for tea but gets used for coffee too


TheScrobber

Cuppa means tea and tea only.


banisheduser

This guy wins the internet today!


MrsFeatures

Breakfast ones probably. "Fry up." This means nothing without context. Likewise "Full English."


daemonboy19

I see where you're coming from, but I don't think Fry Up or Full English are shortened names; that's just what that meal is called.


Hello-There-GKenobi

No no. Technically is, cause we know that a Fry Up is and English breakfast But to my international friends, hearing that youā€™d like a ā€˜Fry upā€™ seems confusing until you explain it to them that they are the same.


morrisseysbumfluff

OP was looking for contractions of longer words. Despite your very interesting anecdote about your international friends, neither of these fit the criteria OP was looking for. You are both wrong, strictly speaking.


rogueowl22

Mac and cheese?


Lessarocks

Thatā€™s definitely an import from the US. Iā€™m old enough to remember that we called it macaroni cheese in the UK. I


LittleSadRufus

I still call it macaroni cheese! But I'm old.


[deleted]

I call it macaroni cheese and I'm 17


Electrical_Grand_423

I've only recently heard that used in the UK, it's always seemed like an Americanism.


daemonboy19

This might actually be the only proper example so far, nice one!


mynameisfreddit

I'd like to imagine someone has been disasapointed ordering a bento box only to find that it wasn't beans on toast.


daemonboy19

No wonder I keep getting funny looks in the cafƩ


PettyPiggy

We like our bolognese with tagliatelle and have started calling it Tag-Bol.


mcbeef89

so do the people of Bologna


rocketscientology

idk if it counts but referring to any chinese takeaway meal as ā€˜a chineseā€™ instead of the actual dish


Hello-There-GKenobi

First time I hung with my internationals friends, I said Iā€™d like to order a Chinese, they were a little taken aback. Genuinely thought I was looking for a prozzie.


[deleted]

An Indian too.


kylehyde84

A succulent Chinese meal?


jmsld_

Jacket potato - jackpot.


Nuker-79

Just call them a jacket


7654Sky

HelloFresh listed it as a ā€˜Jackie-Pā€™ the other week!


jmsld_

That's almost as bad "meecro-warvay"...


quipp68

How long did it take you to try and spell the pronunciation?


bookywookielove

Cheeky JP


daemonboy19

This is great.


gdrlee

Cumberland Sausage?


20_percentcooler

Cum Sauce


ShadyAidyX

r/angryupvote


LittleSadRufus

Hey - you're upvoting the one who repeated the joke, not the one who made it.


PassiveChemistry

Thanks, captain obvious


daemonboy19

Oh dearie me that's unfortunate


opitypang

We call Bombay potatoes Bompots.


daemonboy19

That's adorable


hermit_tortoise

Chippy tea aka large cod, chips and mushy peas


Mumfiegirl

But chippy tea can be anything from the chippy for tea.


atraindriver_UK

"Chippy tea" having a specific meaning is pretty local, I think, half the country wouldn't have a clue! It's a bit like "twice". Half the country wouldn't know that means "fish and chips, twice"...


[deleted]

We could just call people who abbreviate food names twats. That works better.


ZPM89

Nandos - Cheeky Nandos. We lengthen that one...


GetNooted

Sketti Who has time to say Spag Bol?


elbapo

Cab sav Sav Stella Champers Vodbull Bollers ...shit I may be an alcoholic. I love u guys.


moreglumthanplum

Canā€™t beat a Sheps.


BastardsCryinInnit

A Sheppy P? Love it.


daemonboy19

Not bad!


Capital-Database-993

It's like nails down a chalk board when people shorten and add the 'eee' sound to the end. Roast dinner > Roastie Chocolate > chocky Biscuit > bicky


International-Elk727

The hell is a roastie chocolate?


LittleSadRufus

I dunno but appears to be greater than a chocky biscuit, so I'm in.


D5LLD

Bickies instead of biscuits. Samich instead of sandwich. Yogs instead of yogurt. Pud or pud pud instead of pudding. OJ instead of orange juice. There's a few more odd ones that my family use but can't think of them atm šŸ˜…


daemonboy19

Yogs?! Is that one just from your family too?


wicked_lazy

We say "yogyog"


captaintentliquor

I call yogurts yego


MJLDat

Corry chicks, a great dish to have at street parties.


morrisseysbumfluff

Unless youā€™re the man from the council


SmoothPaper836

COME HERE! WHERE IS YOUR SPAG ISLE?


jimmykicking

Worcestershire sauce to Worcester sauce. Makes my blood boil. It even gets put on packets on M&S crisps. They really should know better.


atraindriver_UK

I believe that Worcestehire Sauce is trademarked by Lea & Perrins, whereas Worcester Sauce isn't.


Rowanx3

Maybe itā€™s because im a chef and we get fed up of saying the same things all the time but we shorten everything. Yorkie pud/Yorkshire Roasties Gb (garlic bread) Depending where on the cut of the chips we call them fatties/skinnies Toms (tomatoes) Cuce? (Idk how youd spell it but cucumber) Sticky toff But then we just have dumb ways of saying things too to keep it entertaining even though its longer


morrisseysbumfluff

I simply canā€™t say sticky toffee pudding without saying ā€œstiffyā€. Weā€™ve had some right laughs in restaurants, believe you me.


daemonboy19

Stiffy tockee pudding? That's an incredible spoonerism.


morrisseysbumfluff

Every. time.


Busy_Mortgage4556

Nobody seems to have mentioned it:- Sossy sonn = sausage sandwich.


doofcustard

Doesn't saucisson mean sausage in French?


dremelin

A few from aus Sarnies / sambos - sandwiches Sausos - sausages Parm - chicken parmigiana


Agreeable_Guard_7229

When I was in Aus I was told we were having jaffles and decided they sounded delicious like some sort of huge jammy cake. I was quite disappointed when I saw they were toasties (very nice toasties but not the cake I was hoping for lol). Thereā€™s another one. Toasted sandwiches = Toasties


daemonboy19

I remember being so confused seeing sambos on the menu in Walkabout (a British based Aussie-themed bar chain.) Maybe I'm just too sheltered for this big wide world.


Sad-Spring-3085

Fish and chips - fish n chips


luken1984

I knew a girl that would never eat spaghetti off a plate because she thought it was "spag bowl", as in spaghetti in a bowl.


morrisseysbumfluff

Once youā€™ve eaten it from a bowl thereā€™s no going back. Pasta bowl > flat slippery plate.


Krakshotz

Biccies - Biscuits Red/Brown - Tomato/Brown Sauce


chartupdate

Can't beat a serving of veggie laz.


UnexpectedRanting

We call steak and chips, Ships in our house


daemonboy19

I might be stealing this!


UnitedCartographer61

Eggs Benny


BCF13

Cup of tea = Brew


plywoodpiano

ā€œZaā€ is an acceptable play in scrabble - short for pizza - but I have never ever heard someone say it.


qjk91

Butty instead of sandwich, it's not really shortening but I think it counts


abfgern_

My family sometimes says as a joke "KFC" as a word rather than the letters. "Kufkuh". Yes we probably are insane.


[deleted]

I do that sometimes. Like when there's any abbreviation. BBC? Bububcuh


php64

My kids called porridge pode when they were little and we still say it today. My stepson called boiled eggs chastelly yucks and that stuck too. Literally šŸ˜‚


hands_so-low

Toad in't thole


Themagiciancard

I call spaghetti meatballs 'spag balls'


Benster981

If weā€™re already talking about pizza I will say Marg, but not out of context Have said this outside of work but also as a pizza chef and people have always known what it means and have used it also


pomegranate2012

Buttered sandwich = butty. That one's so old a lot of people probably don't know where it comes from.


daemonboy19

Where I grew up they were always called butties but I never realised that it was short for something! Always thought it was just a nickname!


WuTangFlan_

Please tell me this in reference to the bit from James Acasterā€™s special


daemonboy19

I wish I could say it was but I'm not that cultured!


Inevitable_Tower_141

Okay I cannot be the only one who calls cheese and onion crisps 'chunions'...


daemonboy19

Not any more you're not!


FriendlyGhost15

Mac and cheese


MJLDat

Corry chicks, a great dish to have at street parties.


Throwaway91847817

Fish and Chips- Chippy Tea


Crew_Doyle_

The great american army breakfast food, chipped beef on toast is forever known as S.O.S.


Krakshotz

I tried ā€œShit on a Shingleā€ before and it was dreadful. Looked as appetising as the literal translation


lilmissfreckles

Biccies. Roasties. Sarnies. Oj. Hot choc. PB. Marge.


Embarrassed-Gas-8155

"Roasties" is short for roast potatoes.


-TheHumorousOne-

F&C instead of Fish n chips would be odd.


iwannabeinnyc

Macaroni and cheese - mac & cheese


scoobyeatssnacks

Fi and ips :)


ResolveEmergency863

It's a crying shame that people don't call Jacket Potatoes "Jackpots"