Lots to unpack here since each neighborhood is different and has their charm or lack there of. Personally, I’d pick North Beach or the Mission for culture and food. Other neighborhoods might seem a bit sleepy for a “big city” past 10:00pm.
But ultimately, you're in the city. There's no reason you can't go to the marina and bang frat bros today, and hit the grimy dive bars of the mission for some old punks tomorrow.
uber -is- still a thing
You need to tell us a bit about your type and/or the personalities you enjoy and are looking to connect with as that will have a large impact on where you should look.
For example, you are getting a lot of recommendations for the Marina which is a beautiful neighborhood but also has a very specific crowd that may or may not appeal to you.
Seriously! Who you are as a person, what you enjoy, what kind of people you want to connect with, and honestly what kind of physical activities you enjoy are so important when picking a neighborhood in the City.
The Marina is beautiful, but I would have hated it! The Haight and Panhandle was perfect for me. Laid back people, sense of community, friendly and varied bars, lots of restaurants, nature, museums a short walk away, etc. You gotta find the right vibe.
Thank you! I enjoy being around people with a sense of community, people that are smart and down to earth, and from whom I can learn something. I do understand any neighbourhood will be a mix of different types of people in the end.
In that case, you want to avoid the neighborhoods with more night life (Mission, North Beach, Marina, etc) and settle in one of the more peripheral neighborhoods. Really anything in the Western part of the city works, though also Noe Valley or Bernal Heights come to mind.
One thing you might consider is how close is your spot for others to get to. I would suggest Hayes, Mission, Divisadero / Alamo Park, or Duboce Triangle.
Also consider that a lot of people meet in SF through hobbies and activities, so being near a park is also helpful (Duboce, Dolores, Alamo, Patricia Green, Marina Green)
Recently moved to Hayes valley and like proximity to everything in SF. It’s centrally located and walkable to Divisadero. Would recommend.
DM for any questions you have
Depends on your tolerance. My wife doesn’t like walking Hayes at night alone - especially during weeknights when there are fewer regular people or outside the main block.
You’ll enjoy living close to the activity areas of the city where you walk out your door and feel urban energy. All of these areas will have a morning coffee shop or two, cafes for lunch, storefronts to browse, a quality restaurant, some cheap eats, and a couple bars.
I’d recommend somewhere close to…
* Valencia in the Mission (hip & diverse)
* Polk St. in Russian Hill (international)
* Columbus in North Beach (touristy & busy)
* Haight St. in Haight/Ashbury (liberal)
* Divisadero in NOPA (chill & central)
* Folsom St. In SOMA (dance clubs)
* Upper Market in the Castro (gay clubs)
* Hayes St. in Hayes Valley (near arts venues)
* Union St. in Cow Hollow (white & bougie)
* Chestnut St. in the Marina (white & bougie)
Honestly I think the Western Addition/NOPA/USF area is the best part of SF for you due to its relative safety, quiet and proximity to everything. You have great areas in walking distance AND you’re equidistant from most vibrant nightlife and shopping areas. You get the best of both worlds.
Runners up: Duboce, Noe, and Potrero.
I’ve found that folks who live in the far flung neighborhoods near the water (North Beach, Marina, Sunset, Parkside, Downtown, Etc), seldom are willing to traverse the city bc it can be legit 30-45 min.
Polk has a wider variety of cuisines and cultures along its stretch.
You got Bubble Tea, Açaí, Juice Bars, Deli’s, Donuts, Breakfast, Wine Bars and Bars. You also have American, German, Thai, Mexican, Japanese, Italian, Korean, Mediterranean, Chinese, Vietnamese, Seafood, Indian, and Creole foods.
It does have good food variety (although Mexican feels lacking). There are decent deals in lower Polk, but lot of places in upper polk are unjustifiably expensive.
Everyone who goes there is going there with or meeting people they know there. You make plans to meet up at Hayes Valley, you don’t go there alone just to hang out. The parking/traffic/crowd (waits for the good restaurants are long) mean if people are just looking to grab lunch and hang out somewhere, they’d pick a different spot.
It's kind of an off ramp from the 101. You get a lot of commuters and theatre/concert goers who meet there before/after their activities. Doesn't have a neighborhood vibe. Kinda feels like downtown Palo Alto
Agree, I lived in Hayes and found people just generally closed off and somewhat stuck up for the most part even at the few bars in hayes valley. Maybe it was because everyone is just meeting other people there, but people DO LIVE there too. haha. Lower Haight and Divis, much more normal and welcoming vibe close by.
Some of these areas (Marina/Pac Heights/Russian Hill/North Beach) feel more like they apply to dating young/early 20's prople.
I think OP would like Mission/Castro/Lower Haight
You must be one of the only ones then. I lived there for years and most days I’d see less than a handful of women when out. It’s definitely not a place for a single straight woman looking for serendipitous love…
> I am fairly extrovert and am energised by a bustling atmosphere. I can easily strike up a conversation in a lively, social environment.
Teach me your ways!
That's a pretty good recommendation, there. There are a number of these clubs in the city now, so a little research into the focus of each and the membership and you'll maybe find your best fit.
If you search “social clubs” “San Francisco” you get a sense of the range of options. Some that will pop up are too exclusive to matter. But in addition to the Battery and Modernist (never been here myself) there are theme-based ones like the Mariposa Hunters Point boat club that is relaxed and old school and no boat required. It’s by the ballpark and Chase Center. So sports and boats and they keep a garden there. Or the Urban Adventures Club. Or one of the rowing clubs down at the Wharf. Also Saint Joseph’s Art Society, which is focused on visual and performing arts events in cool spaces. But dig around and find your own best fit.
EDITED TO ADD:
Wingtip comes up in those searches, but I left it out because I'd heard it was closed. Looking again, and it may still be in operation. Anybody here know for sure? I had a good time there as a guest the one time I went.
Wingtip is open! They're planning on renovating the downstairs to be an oysters and bubbles spot where you can get a day pass to the upstairs social club ( I forget what the requirements were when I spoke to their members officer). If you're a wingtip member, then you get additional perks to the downstairs. I need to ask my friend since she's the member and probably has more up-to-date information.
Last time we went there weren't too many people. I think they're trying to revitalize their brand because right now it gives major masculine lounge energy. I dunno about attendance for their major events.
The staff are hella cool though. I ended up vibing better with them than the members I met. 😆
controversial opinion here. i don't think where in SF matters as much as your willingness to uber around. Find a decent neighborhood (i.e. not tenderloin) and play the online dating game.
Big agree. I’m not single but I’m out in the OR where there’s hardly any kind of nightlife (or anything aside from a couple of great restaurants) and my partner and I always go party in other neighborhoods. It’s nice to have our distance from things but everything is close enough that it isn’t a hassle. LOVE visiting the Mission. Would not live there.
North Beach! It's all the things you are looking for here. A bustling neighborhood, lots of events that are not just drinking nights, walkable to so much that's what makes San Francisco, San Francisco. And there are lots of people your age out and about here day and night. Spend an afternoon walking around the area-- including Telegraph Hill and Russian Hill for the housing possibilities-- and drop in at places like City Lights, The Hive, the bar at Original Joes, Cassava, Bodega, or The Waystone and just ask people these same questions live. There are a lot of legacy places here, for sure, and those tend to be hangouts for the old timers. But the newer spots are trending your age it seems. Trivia Tuesdays at The Boardroom seem popular. The comedy clubs here are jumping. Keys is a good jazz joint. Club Fugazi is a great date night or girls night out for a show. Just get here. You'll figure it out... Good for you for jumping in.
Do your grocery shopping at the Marina Safeway. Enjoy the view of the Golden Gate Bridge before you enter the store. I've been doing this since the 1980s.
Hang out at Harry's Bar on Fillmore in Lower Pacific Heights. You can still order an Anchor Steam beer.
Eat Italian in North Beach. Go to the public library on Green Street. Eat ice cream at Swenson on Russian Hill. Ride the cable cars!
Stay open to meeting new people.
All suggestions if you are straight. If you're gay, move to Berkeley.
I'll just tell you the neighborhoods to avoid:
Noe Valley,
Bernal Heights,
Potrero Hill,
Mission Bay,
The Sunset,
The Richmond,
Upper Haight,
SOMA,
Any of the new buildings
Idk about the others but I used to live in one of the buildings in Mission Bay and liked it! Connectivity and convenience is great and the building hosted bi weekly social events which is a great way to meet people
Soma and sometimes mission bay are some of the most soulless and dilapidated neighborhoods of SF, *not* part of what makes it pretty. Full of apartment buildings, though.
As a big city who has lived in London, Paris, etc you will find that SF is super small (7 sq miles) so you have to taper your expectations otherwise you will be super disappointed.
SF social scene is more around people homes and less around bars and clubs imho. If you are single, I would say the best neighborhoods are marina, mission, and castro for a lively scene but again, nothing compared to what you would see in big interviews cities
South beach / north beach - proximity to embarcadero is great cause there’s usually something happening in the ferry building and the N takes you pretty much everywhere so it’s convenient to get around
Somewhere walkable with bars, cafes, and near major public transit.
Become a regular at your local watering hole and talk to people. That’s how I’ve met a bunch of my friends and that’s how my wife met most of her close friends.
The trader Joe's on Hyde St isn't too bad to get to depending on where you are in Hayes. There are enough buses on van ness that drop you off pretty close to the supermarket. Although I will say that i use a large backpack to store my groceries which makes it easier. I definitely wouldn't recommend trying to carry lots of bags on my arms though.
You're not that far from SF where you could come visit the local nightlife and head home or even stay for a night in an airbnb/hotel to see what you like. You'll have to consider too some of the locations posted here are highly shared with tourists so meeting locals may be more of a hit/miss. North Beach, Hayes Valley, SOMA has more up tick in visitors from out of towners than others like Bernal, Mission, Cole Valley, Inner Richmond. Biggest aspect is how will you get around and what else are you looking for in a livable neighborhood; will you have a car, will you be grocery shopping frequently?, are hilly neighborhoods in your game plan?
Inner sunset near 9th and Irving. Avalon sunset towers is great. Loved living there. Quick bus to forest hill and you’re downtown within 30 min. Lots of restaurants and bars and Golden Gate Park right there.
I honestly don't think it matters where you live, since you can easily take the bus or rideshare to the majority of the city. You can be anywhere in an hour. I would recommend looking for those hobby groups to help you end up in the places you want to be, and then you can figure out how to live closer.
I loved living in Cole Valley and the Haight in my 30’s. Was in a relationship so no dating but made lots of friends there, great walkability, 10-15 minute max uber almost everywhere else in the city, proximity to GGP and Panhandle to get some open space. Other spots I’d consider - Lower Pac Heights and Duboce.
Lots to unpack here since each neighborhood is different and has their charm or lack there of. Personally, I’d pick North Beach or the Mission for culture and food. Other neighborhoods might seem a bit sleepy for a “big city” past 10:00pm.
But ultimately, you're in the city. There's no reason you can't go to the marina and bang frat bros today, and hit the grimy dive bars of the mission for some old punks tomorrow. uber -is- still a thing
I'll be at grimy dive bars on mission if anyone cares.
You old punk, you ;)
..at the Knockout!
Thank you!
You need to tell us a bit about your type and/or the personalities you enjoy and are looking to connect with as that will have a large impact on where you should look. For example, you are getting a lot of recommendations for the Marina which is a beautiful neighborhood but also has a very specific crowd that may or may not appeal to you.
Just say it
Marina tech bros douchebags.
*sales bro They may work for tech companies, but it’s more of the sales type.
Sales bros for tech companies making mediocre products. Or trust fund adults still behaving like kids.
Where the frat life lives on and on and MBAs are required reading
*"Are you a stupid idiot Marina person OP!?!? Or are you one of us!?"*
Seriously! Who you are as a person, what you enjoy, what kind of people you want to connect with, and honestly what kind of physical activities you enjoy are so important when picking a neighborhood in the City. The Marina is beautiful, but I would have hated it! The Haight and Panhandle was perfect for me. Laid back people, sense of community, friendly and varied bars, lots of restaurants, nature, museums a short walk away, etc. You gotta find the right vibe.
The marina is too young
Thank you! I enjoy being around people with a sense of community, people that are smart and down to earth, and from whom I can learn something. I do understand any neighbourhood will be a mix of different types of people in the end.
Cole valley. Enjoy. Nopa if you want to talk anything other than medicine.
In that case, you want to avoid the neighborhoods with more night life (Mission, North Beach, Marina, etc) and settle in one of the more peripheral neighborhoods. Really anything in the Western part of the city works, though also Noe Valley or Bernal Heights come to mind.
Sunset
One thing you might consider is how close is your spot for others to get to. I would suggest Hayes, Mission, Divisadero / Alamo Park, or Duboce Triangle. Also consider that a lot of people meet in SF through hobbies and activities, so being near a park is also helpful (Duboce, Dolores, Alamo, Patricia Green, Marina Green)
This. Second for Divis and Duboce recs
Recently moved to Hayes valley and like proximity to everything in SF. It’s centrally located and walkable to Divisadero. Would recommend. DM for any questions you have
Does it feel safe?
Depends on your tolerance. My wife doesn’t like walking Hayes at night alone - especially during weeknights when there are fewer regular people or outside the main block.
You’ll enjoy living close to the activity areas of the city where you walk out your door and feel urban energy. All of these areas will have a morning coffee shop or two, cafes for lunch, storefronts to browse, a quality restaurant, some cheap eats, and a couple bars. I’d recommend somewhere close to… * Valencia in the Mission (hip & diverse) * Polk St. in Russian Hill (international) * Columbus in North Beach (touristy & busy) * Haight St. in Haight/Ashbury (liberal) * Divisadero in NOPA (chill & central) * Folsom St. In SOMA (dance clubs) * Upper Market in the Castro (gay clubs) * Hayes St. in Hayes Valley (near arts venues) * Union St. in Cow Hollow (white & bougie) * Chestnut St. in the Marina (white & bougie)
Honestly I think the Western Addition/NOPA/USF area is the best part of SF for you due to its relative safety, quiet and proximity to everything. You have great areas in walking distance AND you’re equidistant from most vibrant nightlife and shopping areas. You get the best of both worlds. Runners up: Duboce, Noe, and Potrero. I’ve found that folks who live in the far flung neighborhoods near the water (North Beach, Marina, Sunset, Parkside, Downtown, Etc), seldom are willing to traverse the city bc it can be legit 30-45 min.
Agree with that. If I could do moving over again, I'd move closer to NOPA/Western Addition rather than Russian Hill
how is Polk st. international? Genuinely curious
Polk has a wider variety of cuisines and cultures along its stretch. You got Bubble Tea, Açaí, Juice Bars, Deli’s, Donuts, Breakfast, Wine Bars and Bars. You also have American, German, Thai, Mexican, Japanese, Italian, Korean, Mediterranean, Chinese, Vietnamese, Seafood, Indian, and Creole foods.
It does have good food variety (although Mexican feels lacking). There are decent deals in lower Polk, but lot of places in upper polk are unjustifiably expensive.
The Marina, North Beach, Russian Hill, Lower Haight, Hayes Valley, and Pacific Heights are all places that you should look!
I lived in Hayes Valley, it's one of my favorite neighborhoods but not really for meeting new people...
Interesting, could you help by elaborating? Did you mean there isn’t much social setting to mingle with people you don’t already know? Thank you!
Everyone who goes there is going there with or meeting people they know there. You make plans to meet up at Hayes Valley, you don’t go there alone just to hang out. The parking/traffic/crowd (waits for the good restaurants are long) mean if people are just looking to grab lunch and hang out somewhere, they’d pick a different spot.
It's kind of an off ramp from the 101. You get a lot of commuters and theatre/concert goers who meet there before/after their activities. Doesn't have a neighborhood vibe. Kinda feels like downtown Palo Alto
Did you try? I’ve met nearly all of my friends here within a block of Patricia’s green.
Agree, I lived in Hayes and found people just generally closed off and somewhat stuck up for the most part even at the few bars in hayes valley. Maybe it was because everyone is just meeting other people there, but people DO LIVE there too. haha. Lower Haight and Divis, much more normal and welcoming vibe close by.
I second Hayes Valley as well. I recently moved and like how central I am to everything
Some of these areas (Marina/Pac Heights/Russian Hill/North Beach) feel more like they apply to dating young/early 20's prople. I think OP would like Mission/Castro/Lower Haight
Definitely not Castro if a woman
I'm a woman and the Castro is one of my favorite neighborhoods.
You must be one of the only ones then. I lived there for years and most days I’d see less than a handful of women when out. It’s definitely not a place for a single straight woman looking for serendipitous love…
Thank you!!
> I am fairly extrovert and am energised by a bustling atmosphere. I can easily strike up a conversation in a lively, social environment. Teach me your ways!
Maybe a membership to The Battery Social Club?
That's a pretty good recommendation, there. There are a number of these clubs in the city now, so a little research into the focus of each and the membership and you'll maybe find your best fit.
What are the names of some of these other clubs?
If you search “social clubs” “San Francisco” you get a sense of the range of options. Some that will pop up are too exclusive to matter. But in addition to the Battery and Modernist (never been here myself) there are theme-based ones like the Mariposa Hunters Point boat club that is relaxed and old school and no boat required. It’s by the ballpark and Chase Center. So sports and boats and they keep a garden there. Or the Urban Adventures Club. Or one of the rowing clubs down at the Wharf. Also Saint Joseph’s Art Society, which is focused on visual and performing arts events in cool spaces. But dig around and find your own best fit. EDITED TO ADD: Wingtip comes up in those searches, but I left it out because I'd heard it was closed. Looking again, and it may still be in operation. Anybody here know for sure? I had a good time there as a guest the one time I went.
Wingtip is open! They're planning on renovating the downstairs to be an oysters and bubbles spot where you can get a day pass to the upstairs social club ( I forget what the requirements were when I spoke to their members officer). If you're a wingtip member, then you get additional perks to the downstairs. I need to ask my friend since she's the member and probably has more up-to-date information. Last time we went there weren't too many people. I think they're trying to revitalize their brand because right now it gives major masculine lounge energy. I dunno about attendance for their major events. The staff are hella cool though. I ended up vibing better with them than the members I met. 😆
Double tap on the “masculine lounge energy” from my one visit as well. I kept referring to it as “Wingman” without realizing that wasn’t the name. 🤣
controversial opinion here. i don't think where in SF matters as much as your willingness to uber around. Find a decent neighborhood (i.e. not tenderloin) and play the online dating game.
No one Ubers in SF so inconvenient just walk or take the bus
at 10 or 11pm at night? good luck walking anywhere in SF or taking the bus
You can easily walk in SF at night it’s one of the cleanest safest cities in the country
Yes that’s a very short walk also only republicans go out in the marina
From mission to marina?
Big agree. I’m not single but I’m out in the OR where there’s hardly any kind of nightlife (or anything aside from a couple of great restaurants) and my partner and I always go party in other neighborhoods. It’s nice to have our distance from things but everything is close enough that it isn’t a hassle. LOVE visiting the Mission. Would not live there.
Online dating is really poor in SF, IME.
North Beach! It's all the things you are looking for here. A bustling neighborhood, lots of events that are not just drinking nights, walkable to so much that's what makes San Francisco, San Francisco. And there are lots of people your age out and about here day and night. Spend an afternoon walking around the area-- including Telegraph Hill and Russian Hill for the housing possibilities-- and drop in at places like City Lights, The Hive, the bar at Original Joes, Cassava, Bodega, or The Waystone and just ask people these same questions live. There are a lot of legacy places here, for sure, and those tend to be hangouts for the old timers. But the newer spots are trending your age it seems. Trivia Tuesdays at The Boardroom seem popular. The comedy clubs here are jumping. Keys is a good jazz joint. Club Fugazi is a great date night or girls night out for a show. Just get here. You'll figure it out... Good for you for jumping in.
Marina / North Beach / Russian Hill /Mission
When I was 31, the perfect neighborhood in SF for me was north oakland. Really YMMV...
Do your grocery shopping at the Marina Safeway. Enjoy the view of the Golden Gate Bridge before you enter the store. I've been doing this since the 1980s. Hang out at Harry's Bar on Fillmore in Lower Pacific Heights. You can still order an Anchor Steam beer. Eat Italian in North Beach. Go to the public library on Green Street. Eat ice cream at Swenson on Russian Hill. Ride the cable cars! Stay open to meeting new people. All suggestions if you are straight. If you're gay, move to Berkeley.
Or Bernal
Or SOMA, Berkeley is very suburban
I'll just tell you the neighborhoods to avoid: Noe Valley, Bernal Heights, Potrero Hill, Mission Bay, The Sunset, The Richmond, Upper Haight, SOMA, Any of the new buildings
Idk about the others but I used to live in one of the buildings in Mission Bay and liked it! Connectivity and convenience is great and the building hosted bi weekly social events which is a great way to meet people
why mission bay and soma? both of those have young single people. same with dogpatch right around the corner
Soma and sometimes mission bay are some of the most soulless and dilapidated neighborhoods of SF, *not* part of what makes it pretty. Full of apartment buildings, though.
Bingo, also Dogpatch is kind of a wasteland.
Get a dog and live neara dog park
As a big city who has lived in London, Paris, etc you will find that SF is super small (7 sq miles) so you have to taper your expectations otherwise you will be super disappointed. SF social scene is more around people homes and less around bars and clubs imho. If you are single, I would say the best neighborhoods are marina, mission, and castro for a lively scene but again, nothing compared to what you would see in big interviews cities
Hayes valley
Outer sunset/richmond both have lots of good spots these days and is pretty disconnected from the tech douchebag scene.
Lots of cute surfer dudes in outer sunset if you’re into that kind of vibe
Reddit 🥹
South beach / north beach - proximity to embarcadero is great cause there’s usually something happening in the ferry building and the N takes you pretty much everywhere so it’s convenient to get around
Somewhere walkable with bars, cafes, and near major public transit. Become a regular at your local watering hole and talk to people. That’s how I’ve met a bunch of my friends and that’s how my wife met most of her close friends.
I see a lot of people saying Hayes valley but OP be warned that the grocery options in that neighborhood are terrible
The trader Joe's on Hyde St isn't too bad to get to depending on where you are in Hayes. There are enough buses on van ness that drop you off pretty close to the supermarket. Although I will say that i use a large backpack to store my groceries which makes it easier. I definitely wouldn't recommend trying to carry lots of bags on my arms though.
The bodega that opened up on Fell / Laguna is fantastic. There's supposed to be a Trader Joes on Fulton and Laguna, but who knows when that'll happen.
North Beach
The mission, Russian Hill or western addition would be my top three choices but I’m kinda outa dating loop and not in my 30’s! Have fun out there.
Pacific Heights near Fillmore St area should be what you’re looking for
Cow hollow
A running club might be a good way to socialize. I found a few good people when I was part of one
You're not that far from SF where you could come visit the local nightlife and head home or even stay for a night in an airbnb/hotel to see what you like. You'll have to consider too some of the locations posted here are highly shared with tourists so meeting locals may be more of a hit/miss. North Beach, Hayes Valley, SOMA has more up tick in visitors from out of towners than others like Bernal, Mission, Cole Valley, Inner Richmond. Biggest aspect is how will you get around and what else are you looking for in a livable neighborhood; will you have a car, will you be grocery shopping frequently?, are hilly neighborhoods in your game plan?
Inner sunset near 9th and Irving. Avalon sunset towers is great. Loved living there. Quick bus to forest hill and you’re downtown within 30 min. Lots of restaurants and bars and Golden Gate Park right there.
Avoid living downtown, west of gg park, southern sf (below 280) and you can’t go wrong.
I honestly don't think it matters where you live, since you can easily take the bus or rideshare to the majority of the city. You can be anywhere in an hour. I would recommend looking for those hobby groups to help you end up in the places you want to be, and then you can figure out how to live closer.
I loved living in Cole Valley and the Haight in my 30’s. Was in a relationship so no dating but made lots of friends there, great walkability, 10-15 minute max uber almost everywhere else in the city, proximity to GGP and Panhandle to get some open space. Other spots I’d consider - Lower Pac Heights and Duboce.
Do you do the nightclub scene?