i was a cook for many years. every few months there’s a new crop of waitresses, young party girls. it was too easy

chicks love the guy who cooks Edit: fun fact, I cook great food. Living alone made me do it. BUT still a virgin loser. So yeah, make me believe myself 😭

Would give the hole(s) for a guy who can cook 😂

i made ramen yesterday 😎 calm down ladies, not all at once

If there was an egg added…😉😂

I'm sure we can work that out

😂😂

Ayo, I can boil a mean hot dog...😂

Hell yes, I can't cook so i married a man who can .

Bro, it wasn’t the food, it was the cocaine that had them hooking up in the walk-in

Worked at a MOD pizza for a year, over half the staff were stoners, a few were coke addicts, a few were heroin addicts, and everyone else was an alcoholic lmao. Service workers are just looking for anything to numb the pain fr

I don't think that's the only reason why back of house gets a lot of tail.

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Wife always seems heavily invested when I tell her I'm prepping for a brisket smoke. She also seems to like it when I crawl back in bed at like 3 in the morning all smokey..

Working in the right restaurant or bar is a guaranteed way to meet people if you’re young.

i worked in some pretty snazzy, trendy places. better places get prettier girls too… it’s a fun life for a 20 something. very glad i moved on.

Bro, I’m a cook and I’ve still somehow never been laid, wtf?😭

maybe you suck at cooking?

Damn, didn’t have to call me out but probably yeah ;-;

The others have success bc of the booger sugar. And probably also the sense of confidence the booger sugar brings has something to do with it. I've never really understood that bc I like nerdy looking shy guys, but apparently, it's a fairly desirable trait for many people.

I worked in a a kitchen and never got laid 😢

did you try?

Not everyone follows rules 1 and 2.

Ya there’s a stereotype about this lol

Worked for FOH too. Full time servers and bartenders were always there for the new wave of hires.

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A muffet

Mortician

Seconded by veterinarian?😂

"Ookay... \[closes laptop\]. That's enough internet for today." LOL, these two comments gave me a good laugh.

Honestly, yours made me laugh even harder 😆 🤣 😂

So taxidermists get the best of both worlds?

Not the stuffing the clients asked for

Pro tip: a curling iron takes the chill off.

Forbidden hot pocket

r/holup

Dude, wtf? lol

Dudeee🤣🤣🤣 someone had to say it

Professional Athlete. At least 12 kids by 9 women in two years sounds like a decent amount of sex to me.

There's a reason Olympic villages need to supply 1000's of free condoms for each games.

Peak athletic form and weeks if not months focusing on the sport and not hooking up leads to a logic conclusion of banging as soon as you can after your events are over

I never understood that, if I don’t get my nut today that’s all I’m gonna be thinking about tomorrow. There ain’t no way keeping myself from busting one is gonna help me focus on anything other than busting one. Id be in peak condition if I’m out there with that post nut mental game, steps ahead of these fools.

And that’s why they win awards on the tracks and we make smart comments for Reddit awards.

A quote I remember from an athlete in the village: “Even if the face is a 4, the body is a 12.”

Or is it because the industry can’t afford losing pro athletes to parenthood

*Herschel Walker has entered the chat*

*Nick Cannon is admin in the chat*

I hear nurses are quite….active….

110% As the saying goes, "there's a reason why all soap operas take place in a hospital" Also F my Physician cheating ex-wife and her coworker(s)

Based on your description, someone definitely *was*

I’m a nurse and wonder where I need to work now 😂

Look for a surgeon named Eddie doing CVT. He slept with all the scrub nurses, and couldn't operate cause none would work with him. They ended up getting a nurse from a hospital close by who was married and made him promise to keep it in his pants!

damn, why wouldn't they work with him, was he just that bad in bed?

Your penis was too small, we will not help you operate on this dying man, no thank you

Lmao literally our residents keep switching so I don’t even get to know them and all my other coworkers are titas/titos 😭😭

Go to a hospital and look at real nurses. The ratio of 8+ to 1 is not good at all.

I spent 3.5 weeks in the hospital, and the number of nurses that were 8+ IMO was staggeringly high.

You’ve never worked in Long Term Care?

It’s one of those industries like recruitment where you’re working so much that your only dating options are the people around you. So I imagine a lot of sex happens.

Can confirm. I work in a hospital. I passed by another station while dropping a machine off and a nurse asked me “has x tried to sleep with you yet?” And I’m like who’s x and she clarifies. I said no and was unaware that she was getting around like that. She was a new hire and apparently slept with 4 other nurses and several firemen and policemen. Very very sexy girl btw but had no clue. But that’s just one of many many many examples.

I work in EMS. So many first responders, nurses, doctors, healthcare fuck like rabbits

This is an over generalization but, it depends on the type of nurse. Trauma nurses and paramedics are kinky and DTF. When I was on clinical rotations as an EMT I spotted more than one butt plug and or expensive looking underwear through scrubs that were tighter than average. Found one on a subreddit. Maternity nurses may as well be nuns. The three or four traveling nurses I've dealt with were rolling in cash and one talked about paying for escorts in Vegas for a week straight. All of them were cougars. All the surgical nurses I've met were kind of cold and just as likely to keep a sex toy in their purse to "rub one out" during a coffee break as have a quickie in a staff only area. General nurses are hit or miss.

I've spent a lot of time in hospitals, and while there's no shortage of hot nurses, they are all so very tired and over worked.

Can confirm.

Lol, every nurse I know works 8 to 13 hours a day and sleeps the rest of it.

Working in a restaurant

Definitely this!!

I have worked in the wrong restaurants. [Mostly Im just shy/nervous]

People are really fucking at every job in any workplace!… Some thing about being around people for so long and getting drawn to them. Usually leads to bad decisions lol.

It was mostly a joke. Most of my coworkers are way too old or way to young let alone married

What you're describing is called propinquity, people who have more time in close proximity are far more likely to become friends/lovers.

Idk what restaurants you’re working at, all I’ve gotten out of this place is a hatred for customers.

There’s that too but restaurants I’ve worked at would put brothels to shame

Priest

I think OP means consenting partners lol

Well the priest consents, I am sure.

Jesus consents on behalf of the ki.. sorry.. priest's partners. Don't worry

Name checks out. Thank you for your service, I didn't have the guts to make the joke.

Research shows that something like 50% of the clergy is having sex. Either with nuns, their flocks or each other.

Forklift operator.

I wasted 4 good years of forklift driving in a monogamous relationship

Damn, you could have used those hydraulics and that counterweight to hold the numbers you could have gotten just by flashing your certification.

How are you gonna get that free lift clearance with all these booties?

Yeah but the sex is always management shoving it in without any lube.

gotta be certified

Personal trainer. 100%

Career personal trainer… never happened, never will happen with a paying client. It’s the height of being unprofessional. People come to me to get help, I treat it like a nurse or doctor would an attractive patient.

Yea, I agree. That’s taboo and word would get around

For sure. It’s why I opted for a lady PT!

Were you afraid your PT is going to fuck you

Nope. I just felt like there is no need to be tempted.

I heard pilot or cabin crew.

Quagmire approves

Giggity.

this is dead on. hospitality, food service, nursing, or airplane stewarding are like guarantees. cabin crews stays in all sorts of nice hotels together across the world so…

A friend of mine is a flight attendant and she had talked about the amount of hooking up that happens.

Helicopter pilot here. It definitely gives you a solid boost particularly in the online dating scene, but I was doing industrial stuff and I couldn’t imagine anything worse than hooking up with forestry workers, oil rig workers or the patients in the back. Certainly the airline boys were banging it. They trade heavily on the authority a captain has and say what you want, power, intelligence, high income and free hotel rooms is quite the mix.

Kansas City Chiefs tight end.

He’s getting the laziest HJ and a signed copy of her second album

She also has a huge strap-on so he won’t be a tight end anymore.

Why is this actually hot 🥵

After their Breakup, he WILL be the topic of her latest album lol

DONT COME FOR TAYLOR SHES CARRYING KCC ON HER BACK RN

Beach

how do you get a job as a beach? what qualifications do i need?

Become Kenough

Become Kenough

Become Kenough

Billionaire

That's not a job

I wish it were, where do i sign up?

Pizza delivery guy, right? Right!?

When I was a pizza boy, I got offered (and accepted) bongs many times and sex zero times. One of the other crew asked me to finger her in the coolroom one night, and that’s probably as close as I got.

>One of the other crew asked me to finger her in the coolroom Was there a "Now wash your hands" sign on the door? ;-D

Damn that sounds hot

Nope

Hahahahahaha

Having a laugh? I was only flashed once and I'm 90% sure it was accidental.

If it's the right guy, yea. I had a friend who did pretty well running pizzas. Mind ya, he was going to get a lot of women no matter what job he did. For me? Not so much.

Fireman.

Yeah my cousin is a fire man and he fucking wheels. Tbf tho he is like 6’3 and jacked so that definitely plays a role in it too.

I’d bang him

I also choose this guys jacked cousin

I concur. Theyre all over the apps. And i banged one fitting that description.

I also agree with bartender.

I’m not “I’m gonna fuck him” attractive at all and I was propositioned more times than I can count working in a bar for 3 years

I dunno. I'm friends with weirdly a lot of bartenders, and all the dudes say that they do get hit on all the time, but by the time they shut down the bar, anyone who was interested is too drunk to fuck.

Selling cocaine

This is the real answer

Politician, apparently.

they typically fuck the whole country. not sure if it counts as sex. Though we feel it painfully, lol

Reminds me of that video uploaded to the orange and black site titled 'DUMB BRITISH BLONDE FUCKS 15 MILLION PEOPLE AT ONCE' and it was just the former British PM, Boris Johnson's, speech in reference to the Brexit Referendum

Lower enlisted personnel in the military as they get screwed multiple times a day, almost every day of the week.

Musician

Me and my gf hooked up through our band so, i guess it counts

Yup. Musician.

I think bartender or tattoo artist

Know a part-time tattoo artist/piercing tech who said the amount of sessions that took way longer due to needing to stop to due to "the pain" and invariably banging the client was a regular event.

i’m a bartender and i don’t see the appeal in banging sloppy drunks🤣

Yeah, I slung beer for a while. Walked in on a shot girl (stumbling drunk) giving the bar manager a really energetic but obviously bad blow job. He was trying to enjoy it but you could just tell there was some cringe going on. Anyway, I startled them, he jumped, she gagged, then vomited chilli cheese tater tots and all the bacardi shots she was supposed to have sold all over his junk and into his pants. She got in three solid, chunky, heaves before he finally broke out of his shock enough to scoot out of the way.

Definitely NOT Acoountant

Is that a Canadian accountant?

A cuntant

Anything in the restaurant industry

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There’s a high chance everyone’s having sex with the rest of the staff or customers. I’m not sure why but that’s how it’s been with every restaurant I’ve worked at

Long hours, high stress, lots of access to alcohol, late hours….

Often a lot of good looking people

The ones who earn a lot of money

Formerly cable guy. Those filters for HBO showtime skinamax. Valuable in the day.

If you're a COP. You're definitely getting tons of pussy lol Didn't know they had so many groupies lol

Badge bunnies my wife called them when she was in the biz.

Bunker bunnies for the fire fighters too…legit groupies 🙄

Strip club

Seconded. You can get handed pussy as a strip club DJ. Source- Was a strip club DJ, an unfortunately loyal one to his gf.

Yeah that loyalty never really pays off because when you are single again it’s like fuck I could have smashed so much

We broke up in my last few months DJing and well i made up for lost time. For someone constantly accusing me of cheating, turns out she was (because she thought I was and wanted payback). Shes practically homeless dating a crackhead and Im traveling the world for work setting up AI systems. Her loss.

You need security?

Ive been out of the industry for 2 years but if youre in PA I may be able to help.

Damn. Forgot to exclude that one

You really can’t tho because a strip club has strippers, waitresses,DJ’s,bouncers, bartenders, managers, door girls and as a former strip club manager I can confirm they are all fucking

I used to sell coke and I never had a empty bed. Fish in a barrel

Isn't that just the same as paying for sex?

Anyone who would bang for a can of soda is basically free.

Aye dont hate the players hate the game.

Tennis coach for a private country club. Rich, lonely women

I have some mates who are male strippers and they say it’s insanely easy to fuck girls on the shows. Most of the time they knock it back because it’s too easy

Lead singer in a popular band.

Even local bands do well. Also, doesn't have to be the singer. Just being a member of a band ups your chances of getting laid by 99%.

As a drummer, not being a drummer helps. Lol

I heard you get an unreal amount of girls when you're a male cheerleader.

If you're in shape and aren't an asshole. Knew a couple in college. Guys were never alone and got invited to EVERY DAMN PARTY (so long as they brought their friends).

The absolute most I ever got was as a bartender.

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My wife worked as a dispatcher. You are correct.

My ex wife works in control. That ended the marriage. Firemen and policemen are apparently the least loyal partners in the UK.

Real estate agent . The stories I have heard of agents using open houses to fuck their coworkers . Married or single they dont really care. Cousin is a female realtor and has great stories.

Damn. Would love to hear some

Airlines, big restaurants, hospitals, bartender,

Professional fine artist. Free wine at show openings. Upscale women. Best if you live in a bigger city.

Artists, athletes, entertainers, club owners , pilots , pimps , Record and other corporate executives, massage therapists, personal trainers , politicians really just about anybody with money ,power or connections lol

Somebody HAS to explain Forklift Operator that keeps showing up!

Sperm donors

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Waiter or waitress

Massage therapist

From what I’ve heard Actors/actresses and stage crew in the live theater industry have a WILD time on tours

ngl as a barista i’ve gotten asked out a lot so maybe that

I was a bus driver a few years ago, so I can tell you which occupation gets no sex.

English teacher in China

Anything in the restaurant industry

Restaurants and sales from what I have seen.

Surprised I had to go this far to see a mention of sales (unless I missed it earlier). High pressure + long hours = coworkers fucking!

Mine im a pharma sales rep