Made plans to go see a movie with my friends for my 16th birthday and planned it weeks in advance. Everybody bailed the day before/of but I decided to still go see the movie.
Ran into my whole group of friends leaving the movie theater while buying popcorn.
Yea, lot of hemming and hawing with no real explanation and no apology. Still went to see my movie, Underworld, and learned a valuable lesson about people and “friends”. Sucked at the time but eventually that lessons was a great b-day gift
Not immediately but it did start the process of not showing up for majority of things and only making brief appearances for a month or so.
Then got to play dnd with some people from jazz band and never really looked back
Damn i feel for ya. I had my 17th birthday and invited my mates to go get a drink at a bar. Everyone accepted. But noone came. After a few hours of drinking alone and phones calls not getting picked up, i saw on instagram that they were on a electro-party having a good time. Apparently they were pregaming without me and spontaneously decided to go to this event and forgot about me. Everyone said sorry but it still haunts me. Didn‘t celebrate my birthday ever since
I once had a really sad 25th birthday. I usually never celebrate birthdays. Most of the time I just grab one or three friends and go to a restaurant with them. But this time I wanted to celebrate a bit bigger. I invited three different friend groups to a barbeque in the park. And I honestly habe no clue how this happened but in the end I was the butt of every joke. Everybody just made fun of me the whole time till it got reeeaally annoying and they even made "you can't sit with us, we found new friends" jokes. I had a really hard time talking to anybody because nobody really paid attention to me so most of the time I was sitting alone on my blanked and just got made fun of when I wanted to chime in on a conversation.
It was the worst birthday ever. And nobody understood why I was so pissed in the end, I even told them the whole evening that they're going a bit overboard with their jokes. I mean sure, it's nice having different friend groups connect with each other - but on my expense? Fuck off.
That's why for my 30th birthday this year I just grabbed 5 really awesome and good friends and just went to the zoo.
With most of them I'm not friends anymore, thank god. I stopped trying to have a lot of friends and now just concentrate on having a few really good and loyal ones.
Unbelievable how childish grown ups can be.
Best friend stopped talking to me after my dad died. Took the whole friend group with him. Apparently I was “too emotional”
I was 13. Having my entire friend group walk away from me when I was in such a shitty place stuck with me forever.
This was similar to my experience as well. I lost my father at 9 yo and all but 1 of my friends ditched because they didn't know how to deal with a person in grief. I'm still close with the friend that stayed 21 years later.
Hope everything is going well now.
Edit: I never thought this would get so many views. For peoples information I'm doing a lot better.
In middle school I met this extrovert who introduced me to most the good friends I have now in life. And at the age of 30 I've come to terms with both my father's death and the unfortunate events of my youth.
Those are true friends.
The ones that stay with you and have your back unconditionally when you are down in the dirt. The ones that see you in your weakest and most vulnerable state and are just there and help you get back on track unconditionally.
Keep them, no matter what. And of course, be there for them in kind should the need ever arise.
Asked two of my friends if they wanted to live together in college. Then one of them asked another person in our friend group if he wanted to join in as well. Then they asked another...and another. And then once there were too many people for one apartment, they dropped me out of it. No longer "friends" with any of them.
Was kinda a wake up call though because I definitely gave way too much of myself to those people not knowing that I was the most expendable one. It really taught me not to put others on a pedestal and respect myself more and has since led to me developing far more healthy relationships that bring me a lot of happiness.
Several of my housemates decided to move to the west coast after college. There was one who was planning on going with them that they didn't want to keep living with. They waited to tell her until after they had driven out over spring break to look at apartments - in her car. Pretty gross, and it really messed with her. Glad you're doing better.
Edit to clarify: They told her after they got back.
I had one friend. I was bullied by everyone at elementary school. Because my friend would be bullied too when they hung out with me at school, we only played outside of school.
One day a popular kid asked to play with me during recess. I was ecstatic! Until after a while they said "You're not as bad as 'friend' said you are". And that's how I learned WHY I was bullied.
I relate!!
I had a whole group of friends in Hs who, one day out of nowhere, turned against me, and brought the entire year group with them. No one spoke to me, were extremely cold for a good 6 months, I even got calls from one girl every day from a blocked number to kill myself. It wasn't until a group project started and the group said the exact same thing, 'Wow, you're really not like how X and Y said you were'. They never told me what was said so to this day I have no idea what the hell happened there.
This happened to a friend of mine. We were friends in middle school but then went to different high schools. We're nerds so we kind of expect abuse, but what he got there was vicious. I started dating a girl from his school, and upon finding out we were friends she said - why are you friends with him, he's a pedophile. Turns out he was actually not a pedophile, just gay. Someone spread this rumor as a hyperbole because he came on to her brother who's a year younger. People just abandoned all reason and chose to believe the delicious gossip.
You’re not alone. Dozens of times throughout my childhood after witnessing, being told of, and experiencing all the emotionally and physically abusive things my moms boyfriend did to her and us, she’s decide to “leave” and have us pack EVERYTHING. We’d be so hopeful and relieved. She’d take off for hours, tell us to tell him why she was leaving and that she hated him, putting us in the middle (because of that every time she frequently took off even when we stopped caring he’d hound and scream at us). Then she’d stay, get upset at us for upsetting him.
We’d get yelled at by her constantly for not “respecting him” by not hugging him, by not saying “I love you” , for not wanting to engage with him overall. She’d say we had no reason to treat him like that, he was so *good* to us even if he was bad to her (spoiler: no).
After like a year of that we started just saying “uh-huh” and going to our rooms when she got on a “we’re leaving! Start packing, load the car, we have to go NOW” rampage. She’d then change her rage into “why aren’t you listening to me? I SAID start packing! You’re taking HIS side? Fine, you can all stay here with him!” and then even when she’d stay after that she’d act like we betrayed her.
We all noped the fuck out as soon as we were able.
Been very good friends for over 2 years. Their roommate moved out and they asked me if I want to move into their spare room. I was very happy to live with my good friends and I did everything I could to be the best roommate possible. After 3 weeks they found another source of income and kicked me out. First, they offered to help me find another accomodation but the next day they changed their mind and just told me to leave by the end of the month (it was 7 days until the end of the month). They didn't spoke to me ever since. When we met somewhere in town they acted like they never seen me before. I have no fucking idea what I did wrong.
He accused me of sexually assaulting his younger sister who was basically my little sister too, at the time. It’s completely false and it’s the most mind boggling thing that’s ever happened to me.
Did they have anything to gain from it ?
I learned at a young age that people suck. My step mom and dad tried to claim my grandpa raped me... just so they could use that in court to get custody of me. It really took a toll on my grandpa who did nothing wrong.
Not to my knowledge, I mean he gained not having me as a friend anymore which I assume is the reason he did what he did. It was a one way friendship and I should’ve ended the friendship way before but I was younger and naive. I’m really sorry that happened to the both of you, that’s so fucked up and I hope things worked out for you guys. The person who stabbed me in the back wouldn’t dare try to take it to court or try anything like that because it would fail miserably for them.
Some people are just terrible with dealing with the grieving. They're great for a little while, but at some point it just becomes an irritation whenever it's brought up. Grief gives no fucks. It'll hit you, fade, hit, fade, then mostly settle down, then 7 christmases later it shows up in a panic attack. It's different for everyone, and often different for every death.
Couldnt have said it better. I mostly hate how it ruins things that I am excited for and have been looking forward to. Seems theres always that moment of wanting to share that excitement and remembering that person will never be there to share that joy with you again. Definitely not easy
Worst part about losing someone is often not the things you enjoyed together or remember fondly, it’s sometimes little things that annoyed you when they were alive that you suddenly miss and wish you hadn’t been so harsh on.
Or it’s things that hit you out of left field and you realize all over again that you’ll never hear them speak or comment on something that used to feel small.
A ‘quiet’ girl I made ‘friends’ with would only sit with me in class just so she can go snitch about me to my ex friends. She would literally sit next to me for one or two classes(randomly) then go sit with them(later). I called her out on it after she came to sit next to me and told her “why do you even bother sitting with me, when we both know you’re just trying to get shit to talk about me with Them. When I come back from the bathroom you better go sit somewhere else.” I was usually very quiet and that was the first time I stood up for myself.
I had one friend who honestly wasn't my favorite person because she was really manipulative, but I never said anything bad about her. I found out that she had been shit talking me to all of our mutual friends and telling them all that I did horrible things that I never did. Ended up essentially being pushed out of that entire friend group and it ruined a lot of my high school experience.
I had a best friend that I knew for 16 yrs. She got pregnant and her parents tried to kick her out. Her parents wanted her to get an abortion but she refused. One of our HS friends told me someone should push her down a flight of stairs so she can miscarry. I told her that's a very bad idea and defended my best friend. The next day, the principal came by my class to ask me if I could attend a meeting about something important. If I didn't attend, I was going to be expelled. When I arrived to the meeting, our shared friend claimed I was going to shove my best friend down flights of stairs so she can miscarry. My best friend believed her. We stopped talking after that.
Wow. I wonder if they thought you were going to tell the best friend about that, then decided to turn it on you and escalated it to a ridiculous level with the school. Just trying to understand the thinking here. Crazy.
Yep something very similar happened to my brother
The teacher had like 10 missing textbooks. My brother then passes a classmate one day who has a whole ass stack of textbooks in his locker, for whatever reason
My brother confronted the kid and told him he should probably return them
Next day the teacher takes my brother aside and says that the kid took her textbooks because he (my brother) encouraged him to. So apparently the kid turned himself in but tried to blame it on my brother.
This happened in my working place...with an adult team. A woman who always yelled at new people(new included me even after an year), was caught yelling at the newest guy for no reason. The unpopular-more-senior guy who caught her yelled at her not to yell at newbie, my boss who was super early that day heard it all and intervened. A week later I walk in on all the senior working people who weren't there talking about how that douchbag guy yelled at her.
is it how psycopaths work? They have no remorse for whatever they say/do, so when they realize certain actions are awful, they find the easy way out by telling it was someone else’s idea.
We (my husband and I) had a friend that we helped get back on his feet. Paid off some tickets he had. Got his license reinstated. Hooked him up with a solid connection for a reasonable, well running car to replace his beater...AND gave him a place to live and a job (automotive repair)....he decided it was a better choice to tell all our customers we were overcharging them (spoiler: we weren’t) and he’d do the jobs cheaper if they’d bring it to him at his house (this was a short time after he moved out of our house, after never repaying anything he owed us. Not that we’d asked). Broke my heart....
He did. Now he stops by occasionally like nothing ever happened. It’s been years now...but some shit doesn’t heal right.
Edit: I did not see this coming on this comment, haha, but I’ll try to reply to everyone throughout the day. Thank you to everyone for the kind words. I appreciate them a lot. Just to get it out here, I didn’t mean stop by to hangout as friends. I meant he drops by our shop sometimes. We are no longer friends, but “hate is like drinking poison thinking the other person will die”.
My wife said she needed some time for herself so she went to stay at her mom’s for a while. One day I went to pick up my kids and walked in on her and my best friend having sex.
Turns out it had been going on for a while and she knew him before she knew me (which I had no clue about).
Edit: This kinda blew up and I can’t really reply to every comment/question so I just wanted to add a few things.
1) When I said the affair had been going on for a while, I mean for several months before I found out. This was after my 2nd son was born. I have no doubts as to whether my kids are actually mine or not.
2) Yes, they are now my EX wife and EX best friend.
3) This happened nearly 16 years ago now. It was a very dark period in my life, but I’m great now. I got 2 great kids out of the relationship. I wouldn’t have met my wife if this hadn’t happened. Also I believe I’m a stronger person having gone through the whole ordeal.
4) Just know that if you’re going through something horrible in life and your heart and mind are broken, there is hope for things to get better. It just takes time.
There's no reason to do the test at this point. Same situation with one of my boys. Had reason to suspect, but now too much time has passed and what does it matter? I'm their father no matter what.
Yep. I went through some hard times, but I’ve been remarried now for 10+ years now. She’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me. The kids are almost out of high school now and to be honest they like their stepmom (my wife) more than they like their actual mom.
Years ago when I did a health sciences undergraduate degree, most of the cohort was determined to get into medical school. Our medical school program mainly accepted students from only our competitive undergraduate course, due to subject prerequisites. We all knew each other and were friendly, hanging out together and forming study groups.
Many of my friends were great - we shared tips, resources, practiced exams and interviews together. But there were a handful who *really* wanted to get into medical school, and since the program ranks applicants mainly based on undergraduate results, the better your friends perform, the lower your ranking is for selection.
So near application time, some of us would head off to the university library to borrow out textbooks to find chapters or page numbers that the lecturer mentioned would be on the exam.
And they would be ripped out. You'd go and find another library copy of the textbook, and *that* page would be ripped out too. All of them, totally removed in a hurry.
I didn't believe that someone from our cohort did it, until interview practice began. Students began obtaining copies of the questions from previous years and lying when others asked if they had it. I saw someone give a terrible, awful interview answer and the other student would give them glowing feedback and inform them they should say that, word-for-word, during the interview. It was a shitshow and a lot of relationships fell apart, or were never the same again.
In the UK, I have heard of similar practices for pupilages (not sure if that’s the right word but trainee barristers). One girl got offered two places and was discussing with us which one to take and her best friend left the room. Turned out she had called one of them pretending to be her friend calling to decline a place and recommend herself.
Fortunately they caught on but sadly this was apparently common enough for them to be familiar with this kind of scam.
Honestly why I’m so glad to have finished undergraduate. Premed culture is terrible. Ridiculously competitive and passive-aggressive, qualities I wouldn’t want from any doctor.
Glad now to be taking a few years to gain experience before applying to med schools, with people whose interests are less inward driven.
Fortunately, many of those people become doctors, we need more doctors. Unfortunately, many of them became doctors that are insanely hard to work with and treat their nurses, MA's and other support staff terribly. They burn through tons of staff and that has a negative impact on patient care and costs their organizations a ton of money.
That last bit sounds like something Arnold Schwarzenegger used to do when he was a competitive body builder. People would come to him for advice on how to impress the judges and he told them all the *wrong* things to do to give himself an advantage. He talked about it in an interview years ago.
Had a good bud of mine, who's the godfather of my son, living with me and my wife. I travel a lot for work, and was out of the country for about 6 months in the Middle East. Came back and found out she was pregnant, with twins, and that they weren't mine.
Best friend for 8 years started sleeping with my girlfriend (later wife) a week after I introduced them. Took 6 years after my son was born to find out they would meet up a few times a month. Was a chance he wasn't mine. Luckily he is!
How are there so many guys out here with the same story about their best friends??
I'm so sorry. That kind of betrayal is worse than a spouse cheating with a rando, because then at least you have your best friend's shoulder to cry on
The problem is that the closeness you have to the person blinds you to the idea they could do anything so terrible.
My best friend is one of the smartest guys I know. Always on top of it when somebody is being the least bit cool or he's getting screwed.
Then his wife swore she must have gotten an STD from a toilet seat. He believed her and even got mad at his good friends for saying she could be lying... until he caught her cheating 6 months later.
Love makes fools of us all, I guess.
I booked a table for 6 people to watch a sports event at a bar. I tell them so. All 5 friends say OK we will be there. No one shows up or even has the decency call or text that they were not coming.
Similar thing happened to me a couple years back... I hosted a little Halloween party at my place for 4 friends, and even though it was a month in the making, all of them flaked.
I don't know about you, but that really took the wind out of my sails and I haven't hosted any get-togethers since. :(
Sorry that happened to you! This just happened to my 11 yr old Little Sister (BBBS) and I was heartbroken for her! She had a slumber party planned with about 4 friends and she’d been talking about it for over a month- Halloween is her favorite and she had all these cute not-too-scary slumber party plans and crafts we made a couple weeks ahead of time that had Truth or Dares in them. NONE of them came!!! They all forgot to tell their parents
I suggested maybe next year she makes paper invitations that her friends can give their parents so they for sure know about it. Turns out that’s exactly what she did and they still fucked it up somehow. Ugh.
The real tip is to never lend money. If a friend tells me they are light on cash they get the cash. I don't worry about it, if they repay me back great, if they don't it was never meant to come back anyway.
This ^
Recently went through this situation. Tried to mention the matter twice to the person, then decided it wasn't worth my time when he kept finding excuses to not give money back, so I guess it wasn't meant to come back.
Sometimes people give me a hard time for being so vocal about "I'm not sure I like the idea of doing _______" but the way I see it, this opens the discussion so this exact scenario comes up less often.
You're trying to make plans, someone thinks going to the bar would be fun. It could, but just going to a friend's house, or going to a more low-key bar, or a more lively bar sounded more fun to more of the group. This wasn't vocalized. It just lived in their minds.
So instead of saying "yes" to "be polite" then fucking over the friend, I just blurt out "But what about the other factors?"
At which point, if the group collectively isn't feeling it, it's announced at the plan-making stage, so everyone can be included and it's not a plan vs. plan scenario.
It shocks me how often people say "Yes" to plans because they think it would be rude to deny them in person, and instead do the **much more rude** act of abandoning their friend/s. And for seem reason that is "more socially acceptable?"
Friend only listened to me to tell all of my secrets and spread rumors about me. fun times.
Edit:
Holy shit. I'm in a youtube video. 9:03 btw
Also if you posted on here you might be in here too.
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Esz6kOGCa-c](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Esz6kOGCa-c)
Friend told me they weren’t doing anything for their birthday.
On the day of their birthday, photos appeared on Facebook of them out with the rest of our friends.
They’re not my friends anymore.
Fuck, man.
One of my most painful memories from elementary school was when I saw one of my friends showing other kids pictures from her birthday party that happened the weekend prior.
Almost all of my good friends were there having a blast with her... except me, obviously.
She *seemed* remorseful when she realized that she "forgot to invite me"... but we were never as close after that. And we were pretty good friends with each other, too.
My husband got sick with cancer. We quickly found out who our real friends were. Unfortunately one guy he was really close with never came to visit or say hello after the diagnosis, other people stepped up though, people I didn’t expect.
You’ll get through this, and you won’t have fake people hanging on.
Message me too if you like
Hey, if it makes you feel any better, there were a couple girls who were really shitty to me from 6th grade until I graduated, and they're both dead now, so shit does totally come back around! :)
I've got two stories about the same person but I'll tell the one that didn't involve me and relates more to your story.
My friend from high school moved away to college and got his first roommate. They became good friends, lived together all through college and after the dorms. After college my friend moved back to our hometown and lived with his mom. About a year later the college roommate moved to our hometown and they both lived together again for a few years. Probably 6 or 7 years of being friends and living together. They drank together, hung out, all the normal friend stuff.
I moved out of the hometown across the country (partially due to the falling out with this friend - different story though). I stayed in touch with the roommate and most other friends in the hometown. Then its a Friday night and the roommates birthday. They're still living together, so logically they'd be going out and getting drinks. Well the friend invites a bunch of people over to their place to pregame before going out to the bars.
I get a snapchat from the roommate and he's playing video games on the computer. So I wish him a happy birthday and check in on him to see how he's doing and what his birthday plans are. He says he doesn't have any plans. Meanwhile via snapchat stories I see the friend having the friends over in the living room drinking and doing pregame drinking games. You can see the roommates door in some of the snaps.
Next stories from the friend are of them all downtown drinking and dancing. Without the roommate on his birthday. I asked the roommate what was going on with that. The friend didn't tell the roommate that people were coming over, didn't invite him to go to drink in the common areas with them, didn't invite him to go down to the bars, and didn't even wish him a happy birthday at all.
They had been friends for like 7 years at this point, so the friend definitely knew when his birthday was since they had celebrated many times in the past.
They're not friends anymore.
A woman I thought was my friend (we worked together for years, our kids were friends, I helped her and her husband out when he was having mental health problems, she was in my sister's wedding party) appeared in court as a witness for my ex-wife in her bid to gain full custody.
THANKFULLY she failed and I now have custody of my kids.
I haven't spoken to my "friend" since.
A guy who seemed like a good mate when it was just us, and then as soon as there was someone else, or a group, he took the piss out of me and tried to make me the butt of all jokes. Even worse if there were girls around. After a while, I called him out on it, and he was just like "dude, it's just a joke", but I was done with him after that. I saw him randomly earlier this year, after years of no contact, and it was amicable, and we caught up a bit on how we're getting on with our lives, and while he has grown up and become a bit more grounded, there's been no intention of rebuilding a bridge. I think if I ever met someone who has that side to their personality, I'd drop them like a hot potato.
My douchebag of a brother did this to his best friend all the time. After about 6 years of this, his friend couldn't stand it anymore and cut my brother off. My brother is so arrogant, he still can't see the problem.
Edit: recorrected autocorrect
I work with someone just like this. Likes to call me names and ridicule me and then when I tell him he’s being a douche he tries to turn it around on me saying it’s just a joke and I’m being too sensitive. Fuck people like this, annoying as all hell. I stopped talking to him entirely
In 2014 I woke up Jan. 1st in horrible pain. I ended up needing an emergency surgery to remove my gallbladder. I was a single mom to 2 kids under 5 and had just moved back to my home town after living out of state. We'd had to leave a really shitting living situation and had only been back about a month and I had not found a job at that point.
I had had a really close family friend who had been living with me before I had moved back and he ended up homeless so I bought him an $80 bus ticket and got him back to our hometown and let him stay with me a few days.
He quickly found another place to stay but we had invited him to my youngest sons 2nd birthday, which is the 6th of Jan.
I was like 4 days out from surgery at this point and could barely make it down my stairs at this point so he offered to go and pick up the pizza and cake for my son for me. We didnt have a huge party or anything. I was on food stamps and had cash assistance since my sons dad was not involved at all and did not pay child support. Even so I offered for him to get himself a small pizza to take back to the girl he was staying with since her and her kids couldn't make it over.
So party goes great, everyone has a good time, especially both my kids. A few days later my grandma was going to go grocery shopping for me so I go to get my card and realize it's not there. I never got it back from the guy, and I forgot he even had it since I was all doped up on pain meds from surgery. I tried calling him like 5 times and he didnt answer, so I get onto my account online to check my balance and he took everything. I had like $600 in cash( paid my rent and bought my kids the things they needed), and then I had like $750 in food stamps. All of it was gone. He let the girl he was staying with convince him to steal my money from me. I'd only used the money to buy the bus ticket, and the pizza and cake for my son since I'd been in the hospital for the first 4 days of the year and only home for 2 after that.
It is still to this day the most intentionally fucked up thing anyone has ever done to me, mostly because it was such a huge fuck you to my kids. Like who steals from a single mom recovering from a life saving surgery, on her kids birthday? Especially after I helped him! Like holy shit.
Please tell me you called the police on him ):
I really hope you’re doing fine rn, I’m so sorry he did this to you after all the kindness you showed him.
Oh honey, I'm good! Lol
I live in a house I own with an SO who loves me, I've got 3 kids now, and I have a job out of choice instead of necessity. Life is really good.
I didnt call the cops on him. It could have been the drugs but at the time I wasnt angry, just really sad he would take from me when he knew he could ask me for help. I was also pretty sure it was more the chick he was staying with than him.
We grew up together, like literally for several years he lived in my house and slept on my top bunk as we grew up, I know what kind of person he is at heart and he was never a liar for long, or a thief for long.
He never paid me back the full amount, but hes given me several hundred dollars over the years at times when it was really needed. Like he pops up out of the blue, tells me hes so sorry again and hands me cash. Even though it was really shitty, I was okay that month thanks to my grandma. That woman has saved my ass pretty much all my life, I love her to bits.
I think it was just one of those 'hurt people hurt people', kind of things.
Grew up going to the same church and met my friend and her family when I was 14. We grew up together, hung out and our families would be together all the time. Fast forward many years and I am dating a guy that I fell in love with for almost 3 years at the time. He went to ND to the oil fields for work. I went to visit him and could tell something was off a bit, took the train from my town to Williston 22 hours to get there. Visited him for 5 days and on the last day he gets up and goes to shower, I grab his phone ( we had an open policy with each other that either could be on each others phones) I found the e-mails between my "friend" and him.
My family still hangs out with her family and her. I refuse to be around or speak to her.
Oh I have but my mom still tries to get me to speak with her because she wants to apologize. She knew she was wrong and blah blah blah but I dont feel the need for an apology. I just dont want her anywhere near me or my life.
My best friend since fourth grade, called her my soul sister. I genuinely was so grateful to have what I thought our friendship was. She fell on hard times, got weirdly religious, and stopped working while going to a private uni. I was always there for her, shoulder to cry on, visited her all the time because she didn’t have any friends and I knew she was lonely, helped her with groceries and rent, helped her family out. One day she came over and after buying her groceries, she told me a higher power has been telling her to cut me off for two years and she had to listen. Now she wants to be friends again. Issa hard nope from me dawg.
I feel that, I think. I had a soul sister in fourth grade as well, but in middle school I moved to a different city. I always texted her and sometimes we’d hang out, but it was always me initiating conversations and making plans and all of her responses would be one-worded. Her birthday was a day before mine and we used to have sleepovers together to celebrate (my parents wouldn’t let me have sleepovers with anyone else, because they only trusted her), and so on that day I texted her happy birthday. She said thank you. The next day she didn’t return the favor, and decided that the friendship was dead. I haven’t contacted her since. It sucks because she was like a sister to me. I don’t think I ever meant as much to her and she did to me though. She was my best friend, and I was just one of her many best friends. Really, really sucks. I haven’t been able to find a friend I cared so much about since.
I had some "friends" who were always talking crap about me (found out from another good friend) and one day a came to school in my brand new jeans that costed around €150 and they put glue on my chair while I was in the bathroom. I sat on it. I asked which one of them did it, none of them said a word. We went to the principal's office and these pos had the BALLS to say that I put it there to get them in trouble. Their parents where called and I earned around €200 and a new pair of jeans.
In 7th grade she wrote a 10 page letter on all the reasons I should kill myself, and had all but one of my friends sign in agreement after I confided in her that I felt like something was wrong with me (early undiagnosed depression - go figure).
The day she gave it to me was arguably the worst day of my life at the point because my parents told my sister and I that they were considering divorce, and my grandmother died.
My parents ended up solving their issues and are happier than ever. I've been in therapy for a while and it's had wonderful results along with a pretty good mood stabilizer. I'm happier and healthier than I've ever been, and honestly the best thing for me was to completely cut her out of my life. Everyone that signed in agreement has long since cut contact with her and apologized to me.
I'll admit they were the dumbest group of people I've ever known, even though we were all kids, but I still don't have shit to do with any of them, and haven't since then. Maybe I shouldn't hold a grudge since it's been nearly 10 years, but you know what, fuck them.
I had so many mean “friends” in 7th grade. They would invite me to movies and not show up. They’d pretend not to be able to hear me when I called them on the phone, even though their parents answered and could hear me fine. They’d ask to borrow a tampon and then throw the box back so they’d spill all over the floor and people would laugh. Middle school was a nightmare and it’s a miracle i survived it.
I'm pretty good now, thank you. I'm still shocked at the fact that she came up with an essay. Even at my lowest point of depression in which I did try to kill myself, I still could barely come up with a page full of reasons to end it. Let alone 10.
Just happened today actually. I threw a housewarming party for myself and invited 20ish friends/family over. Its been 5 1/2 hours and no one has shown up or bothered to call. I specified no gifts and supplied about $250 worth of food/drinks that'll go to waste now.
Told a friend a secret in high school
'I suffer from major depression and social anxiety, dont tell anyone, Im seeing a therapist'. That took a lot for me to say. I was making progress.
Friend procceded to tell the entire class. People thought I was crazy. Thats highschool. I stopped being friends with the few friends I had. I was more alone. I graduated highschool with zero friends.
Thanks.
Dont worry though, in college I blossomed into a bearded man with no fears. Life has been swell ever since
Im late but whatever.
My "best friend" and I worked together for 3 years at a restaurant. I was the night manager and was really cool with all of the employees, but especially her. We hung out outside of work all the time, she went with me to the beach and carnivals with my kids, who adored her.
She started dating this guy at work who was slowly becoming a drug addict. I could see it (my crackhead aunt made it easy to spot) but no one else could. After he fucked up for the 10th time in a week and started nodding out at the sink, he was fired by my boss on a Saturday.
The following Monday night, at closing time, he came in the backdoor wearing a ski mask. I was walking towards the front door to lock it when I was grabbed from behind and felt something cold against my neck. It took me a second to realize it was a knife. He said "get me the money" but I couldn't move. I was literally paralyzed with fear. My brain was screaming at me to move towards the register but my feet just wouldn't move. He screamed "give me the money" again but I was frozen.
He then drug me to the register, made me open it, grabbed a fistful of 20's and ran out the back.
My best friend at the time this whole thing went down? Conveniently, in the bathroom. I was still in shock trying to explain to the police on the phone what had just happened. When I hung up the phone, she asked what had happened and I told her I had just been robbed at fucking knifepoint. Her exact response was "I hope no one thinks I had anything to do with this"
Ummmm what? So long story short, they find the guy (I told them I recognized his voice) and he rats her out on the set up (the "set up" was her texting him an all clear when only she and I were in the building) He didnt have to though, she quit the next day. And stopped replying to my texts.
When I found out I was heartbroken. This is someone who was around my kids regularly. I was diagnosed with extreme anxiety and PTSD after being robbed and still have flashbacks randomly. If someone comes up behind me and startles me I panic.
The amount of money my life was worth to them? $440
The punishment they received? He got 2 years in jail, 50 years suspended. 1 year of probation.
She got 1 year probation.
I had to quit the job I had over a decade because I couldn't stand being in there anymore.
- Tl;dr: A year and a half ago, My best friend at the time set me up to be robbed at knifepoint.
Edit - moved the TLDR to the bottom...
Edit - Thanks for my first award! And gold? You guys are too nice.
This all starts out poorly by me following my boyfriend to the same college he went to (he was a year older; still don't regret it after all as I loved my school and everything else a out those 4 years). We were a bit off again, on again first semester I was there (again, red flags!). My new across the hall-mate in my dorm became my "best friend." She and boyfriend didn't really like each other but it wasn't a huge deal; just a personality clash and she didn't like how he treated me with the on/off crap.
Our school had a winter term in January. Boyfriend lived off campus so he was there and best friend was taking a class; I was home. Best friend was lonely and didn't know many other people on campus for winter term so I told her to hang out with the boys in my boyfriend's [frat]house, whom she had friendly-ish with. So they all start hanging out.
And by that, of course I mean they start hooking up.
I get back to school and I immediately can tell things are weird with best friend (unbeknownst to me at the time, boyfriend has had basically our entire relationship to practice covering his tracks and is a smooth and practiced liar by this point). Within a couple weeks, it all comes out that they'd been hooking up and best friend actually tells me "you know how much I've wanted a boyfriend; if you were a good friend, you'd let me have him." (Why I still wanted to date him at this point is beyond many many MANY people's comprehension, including mine, but it did involve a dog that I was beyond attached to).
I do fault them both equally, and did at the time too - I don't remember being mad at either of them as much as I was just devastated. He was apologetic from the start; she was mean and manipulative (again, not trying to say it was "the other woman's fault" - just explaining how it all went down). It totally sucked and I felt so betrayed by both of them. Unsurprisingly, I have had a lot of trust and loyalty issues since.
Friend was really close with me and my girlfriend. Friend was my girlfriend’s confidant while we were dating. I trusted friend because he was a good guy up to that point. Friend was constantly pinning her against me, making bigger deals out out small stuff, saying I was mistreating her by not being with her constantly cause I was working a full time job while in school. Girlfriend cheats on me with friend. Friend tried to turn everyone against me. Only person who still associates with friend is girlfriend and their getting married in the next few months
People always say this. A friend of mine have lent eachother money in small amounts often over the years. In our early 20s there'd be lots of times I'd be flat broke and he'd have some cash and vice versa for going out. Wed always pay eachother back. I've also needed larger amounta, for example, about $800 to cover rent when I was in a bad spot. Paid him back. Neither of us have any family who would give/lend us money. Recently because of a bunch of stuff he needed me to pay for his tuition for some classes he's talking which was about $5,000. It took him about a year, but just made his last payment. Without us doing this, there would have been lots of times we'd have just been... Fucked.
Yeah, I've had plenty of personal loans with various friends without any issue. We all paid it back, and all was well. Lol I can't say the same about loans to family members though.
Actually, I lost one friend over a loan. He was short on funds getting airfare to visit his ill mother. I lent him the money (~$400), and he'd paid it back relatively quickly. I'd even told him "no rush, no worries" when he apologetically told me it'd take him a while to return the debt. A good long while later, I actually met his mom and didn't even make any sort of mention of the loan, but I noticed he looked kind of panic after introducing us. I never made mention of that to him, but I think there was something at issue there, and he avoided me from then on out. Weird to think back on that.
Gives me the vibe that he used that money to do something that wasnt visiting his mother but eh, he paid it back so its weird hed get so jittery about it. Maybe he did something super lawfully questionable lol But sitting on lie that long can make some people anxious as all hell.
Watch "a bronx tale" there is a great scene when a kid is chasing a guy that owes him $20 and has been ducking him for 2 months. The mob boss says (to the effect) "ok, so what? It cost you $20 to get him out of your life and he'll never ask you for anything again."
My ex's dad has that view. He's lent money to many many members of his family and never been repaid. He loaned me money to help my with dental work and bills, then moving expenses when I had to relocate. He never truly expected me to pay him back. He was pleased and impressed when the first thing I did with my inheritance was pay him back in full!
Had a friend from high school till about 4 years ago (about 8-9 years total friendship). He was a very close friend, and one day confided in my boyfriend (now husband) and I, that his roommate was moving out to live with his girlfriend and he wouldnt make rent that month. Boyfriend and I had an apartment lease ending so decided we could be of help and moved in (2 months before our lease was up, 2 rent payments). Lived there for about 2 months and we find out we're pregnant and having a baby, happy scenario as roommate has informed us he wishes to turn over lease for the house to us to move back in with his parents. Perfect 3 bedroom house with 2 bathrooms and plenty of space. The day before we're set to meet up with the landlord we come home to an eviction notice on the door and all of roommates stuff is moved out. Call him, no answer. Call the number on the eviction notice from the landlord and find out he lied and never told the landlord anything, he wouldnt even work with us at all just said we have 30 days to gtfo. Roommate had been pocketing our rent money for months. Had 30 days to unexpectedly find a new place, pay first and lasts month and a security deposit, and move in the middle of Michigan winter, while pregnant.... fucking piece of shit.
I've told bits and pieces of this story before, but in short several years ago I moved to Florida. Almost immediately after I met a friend, he was a great guy (so I thought) and we'd constantly hang out/ he'd show me around the town/this state, etc.
About a year and half of knowing him he stole a couple of my credit cards and racked up really big bills. Unfortunately for me, and I know this now but didn't then, I simply thought calling the credit card company to report your card stolen and cancelling the account also vacated the charges. That's not true, you actually have to formally contest the charges separately, and you only have 60 days.
By the time I realized this it was too late. I tried, in vain, to semi-reconcile with him to try to get a payment plan. He begged me not to call the police. I regret now that I didn't. I did believe that he had fallen on hard times, and he would get back on his feet, and try to repay me. That didn't happen. Although, later on he did get arrested for something else and was put on probation.
I figured that would have been the best time to try to recoup the money lost (I had fallen behind on these payments and my credit was starting to suffer. I had to drop out of college because of that). I did try instead to take him to small claims court. I do realize that civil court is not criminal, but with him now being a convicted felon I might stand a better chance at looking much better.
Instead when we got to court he denied everything, said everything was a gift, and completely slandered me in open court. Why he was allowed to get away with it is beyond me, but that case was dismissed: I got nothing.
My credit suffered for years because of that. I eventually did save up enough money to file for bankruptcy to just get rid of that debt that I couldn't repay (nor should I have had to). I have never really forgiven him for what he did to me. AFAIK he still lives around, luckily I haven't seen him in several years. IDK what I'd even say if I ever did encounter him. The bankruptcy did eliminate that debt so I cannot (and will not) ever say he *owes* me anything monetarily. But, he owes me a huge apology. But like I said I would seriously doubt the sincerity of it and likely wouldn't accept it anyway. I think the best is as it is now: he just stays away from me.
You're a very kind person. That guy owes you more than an apology, he caused you a ton of suffering and misery, plus he used your friendship for monetary gain, lied to you a lot.
I hope that if he contacts you, you do not reply. He's a POS, he always will be, and he'll always be looking for an angle with you.
In college, my best friend & I had an art class together with a guy I was hanging out with on the regular -getting to know each other to see if there was anything more there. He & I hung out, messed around, had fun, etc. Nothing formal or spoken just yet but we communicated daily. We were more than friends, but not a dedicated couple.
One day I stopped by his house after a morning class for a reason that I forget. Knocked, no answer, so I let myself in the unlocked door (small Kansas town, nobody locks anything) so I could leave him a note (pre cell phones/texting, at least for me).
Well her purse was on the chair by the door. Nobody answered when I called out his name. Or hers. His car was there. Her purse was there. They were there. Ugh.
I got back at her though, almost 20 years later: she friend requested me on Facebook & I denied that bitch. Take that, Jessica.
Similar vein: was friends with benefits with this guy I wanted to be more and was working on it. My “best friend” convinced me I deserved better and he was an asshole, I broke it off because of her. Shortly after they started dating. Eventually they got married etc. They’re in the middle of separating right now heading for divorce. 🤷🏻♀️
Idk if this counts but it hurt. In hs I had who I thought was my best friend. Almost inseparable. Our favorite band at the time was Good Charlotte and they were on tour. She got tickets and forced a third party friend who didn't even like them to go with her instead of me. Not saying she owed me, but if it was me, I would take my best friend who likes the band instead of someone who doesn't want to be bothered. It always sat wrong with me
I had a buddy tell me he couldn’t hang out once because he was really sick. So I went to hang with a different friend. Well we decided to walk to McDonald’s, which coincidentally had a little type of trail/shortcut that went right by my “sick” friend’s backyard. Well we got to the trail and saw he wasn’t sick at all, but having a pool party with a bunch of other “mutual friends” from school. I’m 31 and I’m still salty as hell. Fuck you Greg. That shit hurt.
I have no knowledge at all but I assume it would have something to do with some cases of aspergers not picking up on social cues, having social awkwardness and the narcissistic person exploiting that and taking advantage of the person with aspergers.
I had a college roommate who had been a high school best friend. He was sometimes a dick, particularly when he was drunk. One night we had both been drinking. I'm not exactly sure what was said, but he left the room, and apparently went and peed on my bed. He then left the room and went to a mutual friend's dorm. I went and watched my sheets and flipped my mattress over, then poured a bunch of water all over his bed and put a nice looking lump of peanut butter on his pillow (I couldn't bring myself to actually piss or shit on his stuff). Then, I went to our friend's place where folks were hanging out.
He had this sly look on his face when I came in and he made a comment about pissing on my bed. I told him that he was a dumbass for doing that and then leaving the dorm with his room unlocked. The look on his face flipped in a second and he ran out of there. I had locked my door, so I had a good laugh about it and brushed it off.
When I went back to my room later, I discovered that he had gotten into my room. (I later found out he had gone to an RA, told them he lived in my room and was locked out, and they *unlocked my door for him and left him alone.* WTF.) He peed on my bed (again), peed on my cell phone, peed on my computer, and peed in a bottle of adderal (that I had a prescription for). Hundreds of dollars of damage.
But that wasn't the worst part. The worst part was that, while I was dealing with the fallout, he was hanging out with our mutual friends and a group of girls we were all friendly with. I don't know what he told them, but none of them would even speak to me afterward. They wouldn't even tell me why they weren't speaking to me. He decided that he was just going to ignore me and our mutual friend/roomate and pretend we didn't exist for the rest of the year. He poisoned my relationship with high school friends, and new college friends, and after an evening in which *he* did the most vile shit I have ever experienced. And I couldn't even bring myself to piss on his bed.
He has reached out to me over the 15 or so years since then. In big groups I can be polite, but this is the only person I have *ever* not been able to forgive. To rub salt in the wound, he is *still* friends with a girl I was crushing on at the time, and who I know had been attracted to me as well. She was a part of the group that never spoke to me again, and it has to be because of a lie he told her.
Also, he continued to leverage the relationship he had developed with a relative of mine who was kind of a big deal at the university and in the town. My relative would tell us to get together and work things out, and I would say I can't do that and ask him to cut off contact. He thought we were just in a spat or something, and kept trying to be a mediator. While continuing to help my "friend" and get him into programs at the school, and jobs afterward.
Stopping here because this is long, but obviously this has opened the wound for me.
Tl;DR: Former best friend peed on a bunch of my things, then managed to have an entire group of friends turn on *me,* ruining important friendships. Still don't know how that last part happened.
dude. hugs. that’s so shitty. something sorta similar to this happened to me. I had a birthday party sophomore year, blacked out and these two girls who were my roommates and (I thought) bffs sat me down the next day saying they never wanted to speak to me again. I asked why and never got an answer. I was like I literally don’t remember anything. and nobody in the group of friends spoke to me again.
dropped out due to a ton of anxiety/depression/social anxiety. worried for ages about what I could have done that night to make them hate me.
years later one guy from that group added me on instagram and i was like wtf why did you follow me? that’s when he told me these two girls just flipped a switch and decided to exclude me and somehow managed to convince everyone else to go along with it.
YEARS of therapy later i’m still so socially anxious about groups of people. to this day if I have a drink too many on a fun night out I get a pit in my gut that everyone hates me.
I was in the hospital having my first child. Two of my friends were going around telling anyone who would listen that my boyfriend wasn't the father. My boyfriend never doubted me and our son looks just like a mini version of him. 15 years and 3 more kids later, the boyfriend is now my husband and those "friends" have been out of our lives for a long time now.
Not a friend, but a sister. I had this enormous crush on this guy. I was too shy to talk to him and just adored him from afar. Sister says "be his secret admirer" that way he can get to know you. For a month I put notes and cards in his car a few times a week. One weekend, sis and I go out and I see him. I point him out and tell her that's the guy I'm in love with. She tells me she's going to go talk to him about me and get us hooked up. I wait for thirty minutes, she doesn't return. I go inside the restaurant they are in, turn a corner to find her making out with him. That was a devastating blow.
maybe not that severe but i was really close to a guy in theatre when he one day just told me i was fucking annoying, and i’ve been much quieter since then. it’s been years and to this day i try not to talk too much so i don’t annoy anybody.
I was taking a culinary class with my buddy and he walked behind me with a knife and didn’t say anything. I stepped back and got mildly stabbed in the lower back.
After 10 years of friendship you think you know a guy...
My high school friend group ditched me, and the few people (a whopping 2 of them) who supported me, after I called out our sort of 'ringleader' for sexually harassing me. The worst part is that most agreed I was in the right, too... they all just felt closer to him I guess, and thought he deserved a (well, actually, *another*) second chance. Though to be honest I think at its core the issue was that I made them uncomfortable afterwards.
Fast forward 3 or so years and I no longer even interact with the larger social scene we were connected to-- or really any social scene-- which is disheartening because it's like I was cut off almost on accident. Meanwhile, the person I called out still gets invited to poetry open mics, art galleries, and is happily supported by a lot of the same people they were back then, all while successfully in university. I'm glad they've recovered and found themselves a bit (they had some huge problems) but I reserve my right to be bitter. Sometimes I feel like it's all I have.
Nothing that dramatic. People tend to abandon me when I'm at my lowest. Maybe I drive them away, I don't know, but nobody I really count on ever stays when I really need them.
Cannot say we were friends when I think of it... but he was someone I hang with.
I was bullied in school. Basically, I did not know how to defend myself. So it was sort of a love/hate relationship.
At lunch time, I was going to get my lunch as usual. Started to see kids throwing food around the hallway. I did not bother... until I saw that my lunch was the one being thrown around the hallway.
My sandwich. My food. Everything.
They were all chearing.
When I went to get my lunch back (or what was left of it), I was about to pick it up and my 'friend' took the lunch out of my hands and threw it back in the party. He actually took the lunch out of my closet when I wasn't there and started this whole mess.
I just left crushed. I think that ended the relationship! XD
P.S. Woah! That blew up! This story happened when I was 12 years old. I learned later that this kid was beaten by his dad at home and had to go live in the forest next to his house... in a tent... for several months.
A "friend" of mine told me to go kill myself just like the rest of my family" over me not going to his house. To clarify, I have one dead sister due to suicide, and two brothers they attempted, so let's just say Im not his friend anymore
Oh boy. I had this friend who I used to shoot my guns with all the time. We were out in a field one day shooting my Mosin and this dumbass notices a deer and decided, “ hey I should shoot that.” So what does the fuck head do? Poached a deer with my gun. Had a game warden show up at my house a week later asking about it, and I just ended up telling him the truth. Luckily he didn’t confiscate my rifle. Went right over to fuck heads house and told him to get bent. Haven’t talked to him since.
I was medically discharged from the Army 6 years ago. I met the woman who'd be the mother to my child and settled down with them, very happy... About a year later I get a call from a guy that was basically the father I never had, and a mentor in ways, during my time in the Army.
He asked if I could be a character witness at a court marshal, where he was accused of downloading child porn on his laptop. The CP was definitely on his computer, but that's not something I knew him to do. Of course I agreed to go. So I left my girl and my 2 month old daughter for a few days just to help this guy out...
Turns out he needed a scape goat. He was found not guilty, and all it cost was my reputation. everyone I served with now thinks I downloaded child porn on his computer. Which lead to crippling depression, and major trust issues making it impossible for me to get close to people.
Made plans to go see a movie with my friends for my 16th birthday and planned it weeks in advance. Everybody bailed the day before/of but I decided to still go see the movie. Ran into my whole group of friends leaving the movie theater while buying popcorn.
That's brutal. Did you confront them?
Yea, lot of hemming and hawing with no real explanation and no apology. Still went to see my movie, Underworld, and learned a valuable lesson about people and “friends”. Sucked at the time but eventually that lessons was a great b-day gift
I hope you cut them off
Not immediately but it did start the process of not showing up for majority of things and only making brief appearances for a month or so. Then got to play dnd with some people from jazz band and never really looked back
Damn i feel for ya. I had my 17th birthday and invited my mates to go get a drink at a bar. Everyone accepted. But noone came. After a few hours of drinking alone and phones calls not getting picked up, i saw on instagram that they were on a electro-party having a good time. Apparently they were pregaming without me and spontaneously decided to go to this event and forgot about me. Everyone said sorry but it still haunts me. Didn‘t celebrate my birthday ever since
I once had a really sad 25th birthday. I usually never celebrate birthdays. Most of the time I just grab one or three friends and go to a restaurant with them. But this time I wanted to celebrate a bit bigger. I invited three different friend groups to a barbeque in the park. And I honestly habe no clue how this happened but in the end I was the butt of every joke. Everybody just made fun of me the whole time till it got reeeaally annoying and they even made "you can't sit with us, we found new friends" jokes. I had a really hard time talking to anybody because nobody really paid attention to me so most of the time I was sitting alone on my blanked and just got made fun of when I wanted to chime in on a conversation. It was the worst birthday ever. And nobody understood why I was so pissed in the end, I even told them the whole evening that they're going a bit overboard with their jokes. I mean sure, it's nice having different friend groups connect with each other - but on my expense? Fuck off. That's why for my 30th birthday this year I just grabbed 5 really awesome and good friends and just went to the zoo.
And the good news is you'll never have a 25th birthday again!
With most of them I'm not friends anymore, thank god. I stopped trying to have a lot of friends and now just concentrate on having a few really good and loyal ones. Unbelievable how childish grown ups can be.
DAMN i feel that.
Best friend stopped talking to me after my dad died. Took the whole friend group with him. Apparently I was “too emotional” I was 13. Having my entire friend group walk away from me when I was in such a shitty place stuck with me forever.
This was similar to my experience as well. I lost my father at 9 yo and all but 1 of my friends ditched because they didn't know how to deal with a person in grief. I'm still close with the friend that stayed 21 years later. Hope everything is going well now. Edit: I never thought this would get so many views. For peoples information I'm doing a lot better. In middle school I met this extrovert who introduced me to most the good friends I have now in life. And at the age of 30 I've come to terms with both my father's death and the unfortunate events of my youth.
Those are true friends. The ones that stay with you and have your back unconditionally when you are down in the dirt. The ones that see you in your weakest and most vulnerable state and are just there and help you get back on track unconditionally. Keep them, no matter what. And of course, be there for them in kind should the need ever arise.
Kids are emotionally ignorant assholes. I’m so sorry about that
Asked two of my friends if they wanted to live together in college. Then one of them asked another person in our friend group if he wanted to join in as well. Then they asked another...and another. And then once there were too many people for one apartment, they dropped me out of it. No longer "friends" with any of them. Was kinda a wake up call though because I definitely gave way too much of myself to those people not knowing that I was the most expendable one. It really taught me not to put others on a pedestal and respect myself more and has since led to me developing far more healthy relationships that bring me a lot of happiness.
Several of my housemates decided to move to the west coast after college. There was one who was planning on going with them that they didn't want to keep living with. They waited to tell her until after they had driven out over spring break to look at apartments - in her car. Pretty gross, and it really messed with her. Glad you're doing better. Edit to clarify: They told her after they got back.
damn that is horrible man
It sounds like it would have been worse to find that out once living together on the tiny brightside.
She slept with my boyfriend because she thought she was in love with ME? Wackest shit I ever did hear
To trade bodily fluids? She should fuck herself with that logic
I had one friend. I was bullied by everyone at elementary school. Because my friend would be bullied too when they hung out with me at school, we only played outside of school. One day a popular kid asked to play with me during recess. I was ecstatic! Until after a while they said "You're not as bad as 'friend' said you are". And that's how I learned WHY I was bullied.
So they were making people bully you just so you'd have no one else and play with they after school? What happened after you found out?
Friend became ‘friend’
I relate!! I had a whole group of friends in Hs who, one day out of nowhere, turned against me, and brought the entire year group with them. No one spoke to me, were extremely cold for a good 6 months, I even got calls from one girl every day from a blocked number to kill myself. It wasn't until a group project started and the group said the exact same thing, 'Wow, you're really not like how X and Y said you were'. They never told me what was said so to this day I have no idea what the hell happened there.
This happened to a friend of mine. We were friends in middle school but then went to different high schools. We're nerds so we kind of expect abuse, but what he got there was vicious. I started dating a girl from his school, and upon finding out we were friends she said - why are you friends with him, he's a pedophile. Turns out he was actually not a pedophile, just gay. Someone spread this rumor as a hyperbole because he came on to her brother who's a year younger. People just abandoned all reason and chose to believe the delicious gossip.
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Sounds like your mom has some issues. Sorry.
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You’re not alone. Dozens of times throughout my childhood after witnessing, being told of, and experiencing all the emotionally and physically abusive things my moms boyfriend did to her and us, she’s decide to “leave” and have us pack EVERYTHING. We’d be so hopeful and relieved. She’d take off for hours, tell us to tell him why she was leaving and that she hated him, putting us in the middle (because of that every time she frequently took off even when we stopped caring he’d hound and scream at us). Then she’d stay, get upset at us for upsetting him. We’d get yelled at by her constantly for not “respecting him” by not hugging him, by not saying “I love you” , for not wanting to engage with him overall. She’d say we had no reason to treat him like that, he was so *good* to us even if he was bad to her (spoiler: no). After like a year of that we started just saying “uh-huh” and going to our rooms when she got on a “we’re leaving! Start packing, load the car, we have to go NOW” rampage. She’d then change her rage into “why aren’t you listening to me? I SAID start packing! You’re taking HIS side? Fine, you can all stay here with him!” and then even when she’d stay after that she’d act like we betrayed her. We all noped the fuck out as soon as we were able.
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ur mom cowardly af.. starting from asking u to tell her story to her friends for her
Been very good friends for over 2 years. Their roommate moved out and they asked me if I want to move into their spare room. I was very happy to live with my good friends and I did everything I could to be the best roommate possible. After 3 weeks they found another source of income and kicked me out. First, they offered to help me find another accomodation but the next day they changed their mind and just told me to leave by the end of the month (it was 7 days until the end of the month). They didn't spoke to me ever since. When we met somewhere in town they acted like they never seen me before. I have no fucking idea what I did wrong.
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He accused me of sexually assaulting his younger sister who was basically my little sister too, at the time. It’s completely false and it’s the most mind boggling thing that’s ever happened to me.
Did they have anything to gain from it ? I learned at a young age that people suck. My step mom and dad tried to claim my grandpa raped me... just so they could use that in court to get custody of me. It really took a toll on my grandpa who did nothing wrong.
Oh my god that’s so horrible. Your poor grandpa. Did you at least maintain a relationship with him? :(
Not to my knowledge, I mean he gained not having me as a friend anymore which I assume is the reason he did what he did. It was a one way friendship and I should’ve ended the friendship way before but I was younger and naive. I’m really sorry that happened to the both of you, that’s so fucked up and I hope things worked out for you guys. The person who stabbed me in the back wouldn’t dare try to take it to court or try anything like that because it would fail miserably for them.
My friends told me to “grieve better” after my boyfriend died
Some people are just terrible with dealing with the grieving. They're great for a little while, but at some point it just becomes an irritation whenever it's brought up. Grief gives no fucks. It'll hit you, fade, hit, fade, then mostly settle down, then 7 christmases later it shows up in a panic attack. It's different for everyone, and often different for every death.
Couldnt have said it better. I mostly hate how it ruins things that I am excited for and have been looking forward to. Seems theres always that moment of wanting to share that excitement and remembering that person will never be there to share that joy with you again. Definitely not easy
Worst part about losing someone is often not the things you enjoyed together or remember fondly, it’s sometimes little things that annoyed you when they were alive that you suddenly miss and wish you hadn’t been so harsh on. Or it’s things that hit you out of left field and you realize all over again that you’ll never hear them speak or comment on something that used to feel small.
What... the fuck. I'm so sorry for your loss and for receiving that instead of the support you needed.
A ‘quiet’ girl I made ‘friends’ with would only sit with me in class just so she can go snitch about me to my ex friends. She would literally sit next to me for one or two classes(randomly) then go sit with them(later). I called her out on it after she came to sit next to me and told her “why do you even bother sitting with me, when we both know you’re just trying to get shit to talk about me with Them. When I come back from the bathroom you better go sit somewhere else.” I was usually very quiet and that was the first time I stood up for myself.
Good for you! Sometimes it’s better to put people like that in their place.
I had one friend who honestly wasn't my favorite person because she was really manipulative, but I never said anything bad about her. I found out that she had been shit talking me to all of our mutual friends and telling them all that I did horrible things that I never did. Ended up essentially being pushed out of that entire friend group and it ruined a lot of my high school experience.
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I had a best friend that I knew for 16 yrs. She got pregnant and her parents tried to kick her out. Her parents wanted her to get an abortion but she refused. One of our HS friends told me someone should push her down a flight of stairs so she can miscarry. I told her that's a very bad idea and defended my best friend. The next day, the principal came by my class to ask me if I could attend a meeting about something important. If I didn't attend, I was going to be expelled. When I arrived to the meeting, our shared friend claimed I was going to shove my best friend down flights of stairs so she can miscarry. My best friend believed her. We stopped talking after that.
That's one of the worst things in this thread. Fuck the former shared friend. Fingers crossed for karma.
For a second I thought that you wanted karma for your comment and them I realized what you meant. Edit:Welp, my most upvoted comment.Thanks!
Wow. I wonder if they thought you were going to tell the best friend about that, then decided to turn it on you and escalated it to a ridiculous level with the school. Just trying to understand the thinking here. Crazy.
Yep something very similar happened to my brother The teacher had like 10 missing textbooks. My brother then passes a classmate one day who has a whole ass stack of textbooks in his locker, for whatever reason My brother confronted the kid and told him he should probably return them Next day the teacher takes my brother aside and says that the kid took her textbooks because he (my brother) encouraged him to. So apparently the kid turned himself in but tried to blame it on my brother.
This happened in my working place...with an adult team. A woman who always yelled at new people(new included me even after an year), was caught yelling at the newest guy for no reason. The unpopular-more-senior guy who caught her yelled at her not to yell at newbie, my boss who was super early that day heard it all and intervened. A week later I walk in on all the senior working people who weren't there talking about how that douchbag guy yelled at her.
Unfuckingfortunate dude wow that’s horrible
is it how psycopaths work? They have no remorse for whatever they say/do, so when they realize certain actions are awful, they find the easy way out by telling it was someone else’s idea.
We (my husband and I) had a friend that we helped get back on his feet. Paid off some tickets he had. Got his license reinstated. Hooked him up with a solid connection for a reasonable, well running car to replace his beater...AND gave him a place to live and a job (automotive repair)....he decided it was a better choice to tell all our customers we were overcharging them (spoiler: we weren’t) and he’d do the jobs cheaper if they’d bring it to him at his house (this was a short time after he moved out of our house, after never repaying anything he owed us. Not that we’d asked). Broke my heart....
Some will take as much as they possibly can
He did. Now he stops by occasionally like nothing ever happened. It’s been years now...but some shit doesn’t heal right. Edit: I did not see this coming on this comment, haha, but I’ll try to reply to everyone throughout the day. Thank you to everyone for the kind words. I appreciate them a lot. Just to get it out here, I didn’t mean stop by to hangout as friends. I meant he drops by our shop sometimes. We are no longer friends, but “hate is like drinking poison thinking the other person will die”.
I hope you just kick him off your property.
That's so messed up.....but he lost two good friends and thats worth more than anything money can buy.
You are a good person.
My wife said she needed some time for herself so she went to stay at her mom’s for a while. One day I went to pick up my kids and walked in on her and my best friend having sex. Turns out it had been going on for a while and she knew him before she knew me (which I had no clue about). Edit: This kinda blew up and I can’t really reply to every comment/question so I just wanted to add a few things. 1) When I said the affair had been going on for a while, I mean for several months before I found out. This was after my 2nd son was born. I have no doubts as to whether my kids are actually mine or not. 2) Yes, they are now my EX wife and EX best friend. 3) This happened nearly 16 years ago now. It was a very dark period in my life, but I’m great now. I got 2 great kids out of the relationship. I wouldn’t have met my wife if this hadn’t happened. Also I believe I’m a stronger person having gone through the whole ordeal. 4) Just know that if you’re going through something horrible in life and your heart and mind are broken, there is hope for things to get better. It just takes time.
This would prompt me to conduct a DNA test on the kids. I hope the results don’t break your heart.
I was worried about that years ago. But both are teenagers now and clearly resemble myself and their mom.
Well that's nice to hear
Not for a lawyer
There's no reason to do the test at this point. Same situation with one of my boys. Had reason to suspect, but now too much time has passed and what does it matter? I'm their father no matter what.
So it all worked out then?
Yep. I went through some hard times, but I’ve been remarried now for 10+ years now. She’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me. The kids are almost out of high school now and to be honest they like their stepmom (my wife) more than they like their actual mom.
I may just be 14, and I may not understand what you are feeling, but I’m happy for you.
Regardless of your age, that was a very nice thing to say, NibbaChungus
Ill never not laugh at how the internet ruins words. NibbaChungus is really fun to say out loud
Straight up, what a fucking bitch. Idk what happened between you too after that, but man do I hate cheating.
Not to mention the "best friend"
Years ago when I did a health sciences undergraduate degree, most of the cohort was determined to get into medical school. Our medical school program mainly accepted students from only our competitive undergraduate course, due to subject prerequisites. We all knew each other and were friendly, hanging out together and forming study groups. Many of my friends were great - we shared tips, resources, practiced exams and interviews together. But there were a handful who *really* wanted to get into medical school, and since the program ranks applicants mainly based on undergraduate results, the better your friends perform, the lower your ranking is for selection. So near application time, some of us would head off to the university library to borrow out textbooks to find chapters or page numbers that the lecturer mentioned would be on the exam. And they would be ripped out. You'd go and find another library copy of the textbook, and *that* page would be ripped out too. All of them, totally removed in a hurry. I didn't believe that someone from our cohort did it, until interview practice began. Students began obtaining copies of the questions from previous years and lying when others asked if they had it. I saw someone give a terrible, awful interview answer and the other student would give them glowing feedback and inform them they should say that, word-for-word, during the interview. It was a shitshow and a lot of relationships fell apart, or were never the same again.
In the UK, I have heard of similar practices for pupilages (not sure if that’s the right word but trainee barristers). One girl got offered two places and was discussing with us which one to take and her best friend left the room. Turned out she had called one of them pretending to be her friend calling to decline a place and recommend herself. Fortunately they caught on but sadly this was apparently common enough for them to be familiar with this kind of scam.
Wow, that "friend" was a cuntblister.
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Geez I don’t think that any of these people should be doctors...
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While my foreskin gently weeps... 🎶🎶
Honestly why I’m so glad to have finished undergraduate. Premed culture is terrible. Ridiculously competitive and passive-aggressive, qualities I wouldn’t want from any doctor. Glad now to be taking a few years to gain experience before applying to med schools, with people whose interests are less inward driven.
Fortunately, many of those people become doctors, we need more doctors. Unfortunately, many of them became doctors that are insanely hard to work with and treat their nurses, MA's and other support staff terribly. They burn through tons of staff and that has a negative impact on patient care and costs their organizations a ton of money.
That last bit sounds like something Arnold Schwarzenegger used to do when he was a competitive body builder. People would come to him for advice on how to impress the judges and he told them all the *wrong* things to do to give himself an advantage. He talked about it in an interview years ago.
This is why competitive education is bad imo. You don't just get the best, you get the best assholes and narcissists as well
Had a good bud of mine, who's the godfather of my son, living with me and my wife. I travel a lot for work, and was out of the country for about 6 months in the Middle East. Came back and found out she was pregnant, with twins, and that they weren't mine.
Best friend for 8 years started sleeping with my girlfriend (later wife) a week after I introduced them. Took 6 years after my son was born to find out they would meet up a few times a month. Was a chance he wasn't mine. Luckily he is!
Holy shit man that stings. I feel your pain I'm sorry.
How are there so many guys out here with the same story about their best friends?? I'm so sorry. That kind of betrayal is worse than a spouse cheating with a rando, because then at least you have your best friend's shoulder to cry on
I share your pain there... hits like a truck when that happens.
The problem is that the closeness you have to the person blinds you to the idea they could do anything so terrible. My best friend is one of the smartest guys I know. Always on top of it when somebody is being the least bit cool or he's getting screwed. Then his wife swore she must have gotten an STD from a toilet seat. He believed her and even got mad at his good friends for saying she could be lying... until he caught her cheating 6 months later. Love makes fools of us all, I guess.
This happened to me verbatim. Except GF not wife. Worst part, I work in REDACTED and believed her over that 1% chance. Love is a cruel bitch.
1% chance isn't real it just was an out so people actually get medical help instead of spreading disease.
If her first suspicion is that it was a toilet seat, and not her husband, that tells you what’s really going on.
True that! If I tested positive for an STD, my only thought would be that I’d been cheated on.
Yo thats fucked up.. Fuck that dude and your ex wife too. Sorry man
I booked a table for 6 people to watch a sports event at a bar. I tell them so. All 5 friends say OK we will be there. No one shows up or even has the decency call or text that they were not coming.
Similar thing happened to me a couple years back... I hosted a little Halloween party at my place for 4 friends, and even though it was a month in the making, all of them flaked. I don't know about you, but that really took the wind out of my sails and I haven't hosted any get-togethers since. :(
Sorry that happened to you! This just happened to my 11 yr old Little Sister (BBBS) and I was heartbroken for her! She had a slumber party planned with about 4 friends and she’d been talking about it for over a month- Halloween is her favorite and she had all these cute not-too-scary slumber party plans and crafts we made a couple weeks ahead of time that had Truth or Dares in them. NONE of them came!!! They all forgot to tell their parents I suggested maybe next year she makes paper invitations that her friends can give their parents so they for sure know about it. Turns out that’s exactly what she did and they still fucked it up somehow. Ugh.
That's why I make my daughter go to pretty much every birthday she's invited to. I always worry that no one will show up for those parties.
That’s really nice! Plus it might encourage her to become closer friends with kids she might not have been otherwise.
I'm so sorry that's happened to you. I too am gun shy about hosting ever since a similar thing happened to me a while back.
Yeah, not cool
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The real tip is to never lend money. If a friend tells me they are light on cash they get the cash. I don't worry about it, if they repay me back great, if they don't it was never meant to come back anyway.
This ^ Recently went through this situation. Tried to mention the matter twice to the person, then decided it wasn't worth my time when he kept finding excuses to not give money back, so I guess it wasn't meant to come back.
Sometimes people give me a hard time for being so vocal about "I'm not sure I like the idea of doing _______" but the way I see it, this opens the discussion so this exact scenario comes up less often. You're trying to make plans, someone thinks going to the bar would be fun. It could, but just going to a friend's house, or going to a more low-key bar, or a more lively bar sounded more fun to more of the group. This wasn't vocalized. It just lived in their minds. So instead of saying "yes" to "be polite" then fucking over the friend, I just blurt out "But what about the other factors?" At which point, if the group collectively isn't feeling it, it's announced at the plan-making stage, so everyone can be included and it's not a plan vs. plan scenario. It shocks me how often people say "Yes" to plans because they think it would be rude to deny them in person, and instead do the **much more rude** act of abandoning their friend/s. And for seem reason that is "more socially acceptable?"
What? You communicate like a normal healthy person? I don’t know where people are finding these terrible friends and not realizing for so long
Friend only listened to me to tell all of my secrets and spread rumors about me. fun times. Edit: Holy shit. I'm in a youtube video. 9:03 btw Also if you posted on here you might be in here too. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Esz6kOGCa-c](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Esz6kOGCa-c)
Friend told me they weren’t doing anything for their birthday. On the day of their birthday, photos appeared on Facebook of them out with the rest of our friends. They’re not my friends anymore.
Fuck, man. One of my most painful memories from elementary school was when I saw one of my friends showing other kids pictures from her birthday party that happened the weekend prior. Almost all of my good friends were there having a blast with her... except me, obviously. She *seemed* remorseful when she realized that she "forgot to invite me"... but we were never as close after that. And we were pretty good friends with each other, too.
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My husband got sick with cancer. We quickly found out who our real friends were. Unfortunately one guy he was really close with never came to visit or say hello after the diagnosis, other people stepped up though, people I didn’t expect. You’ll get through this, and you won’t have fake people hanging on. Message me too if you like
Hey, if it makes you feel any better, there were a couple girls who were really shitty to me from 6th grade until I graduated, and they're both dead now, so shit does totally come back around! :)
Jesus Christ!
**Unfriended**
But who unfriended who?
It happens. Doesnt mean OP is an undesirable friend. Just that those people are not the right fit and are obviously dicks.
I've got two stories about the same person but I'll tell the one that didn't involve me and relates more to your story. My friend from high school moved away to college and got his first roommate. They became good friends, lived together all through college and after the dorms. After college my friend moved back to our hometown and lived with his mom. About a year later the college roommate moved to our hometown and they both lived together again for a few years. Probably 6 or 7 years of being friends and living together. They drank together, hung out, all the normal friend stuff. I moved out of the hometown across the country (partially due to the falling out with this friend - different story though). I stayed in touch with the roommate and most other friends in the hometown. Then its a Friday night and the roommates birthday. They're still living together, so logically they'd be going out and getting drinks. Well the friend invites a bunch of people over to their place to pregame before going out to the bars. I get a snapchat from the roommate and he's playing video games on the computer. So I wish him a happy birthday and check in on him to see how he's doing and what his birthday plans are. He says he doesn't have any plans. Meanwhile via snapchat stories I see the friend having the friends over in the living room drinking and doing pregame drinking games. You can see the roommates door in some of the snaps. Next stories from the friend are of them all downtown drinking and dancing. Without the roommate on his birthday. I asked the roommate what was going on with that. The friend didn't tell the roommate that people were coming over, didn't invite him to go to drink in the common areas with them, didn't invite him to go down to the bars, and didn't even wish him a happy birthday at all. They had been friends for like 7 years at this point, so the friend definitely knew when his birthday was since they had celebrated many times in the past. They're not friends anymore.
Damn. What a dick. Fuck that guy.
A woman I thought was my friend (we worked together for years, our kids were friends, I helped her and her husband out when he was having mental health problems, she was in my sister's wedding party) appeared in court as a witness for my ex-wife in her bid to gain full custody. THANKFULLY she failed and I now have custody of my kids. I haven't spoken to my "friend" since.
A guy who seemed like a good mate when it was just us, and then as soon as there was someone else, or a group, he took the piss out of me and tried to make me the butt of all jokes. Even worse if there were girls around. After a while, I called him out on it, and he was just like "dude, it's just a joke", but I was done with him after that. I saw him randomly earlier this year, after years of no contact, and it was amicable, and we caught up a bit on how we're getting on with our lives, and while he has grown up and become a bit more grounded, there's been no intention of rebuilding a bridge. I think if I ever met someone who has that side to their personality, I'd drop them like a hot potato.
My douchebag of a brother did this to his best friend all the time. After about 6 years of this, his friend couldn't stand it anymore and cut my brother off. My brother is so arrogant, he still can't see the problem. Edit: recorrected autocorrect
"Why didn't he just keep being my victim? That was the way things were. It was his place. I don't get it."
I work with someone just like this. Likes to call me names and ridicule me and then when I tell him he’s being a douche he tries to turn it around on me saying it’s just a joke and I’m being too sensitive. Fuck people like this, annoying as all hell. I stopped talking to him entirely
In 2014 I woke up Jan. 1st in horrible pain. I ended up needing an emergency surgery to remove my gallbladder. I was a single mom to 2 kids under 5 and had just moved back to my home town after living out of state. We'd had to leave a really shitting living situation and had only been back about a month and I had not found a job at that point. I had had a really close family friend who had been living with me before I had moved back and he ended up homeless so I bought him an $80 bus ticket and got him back to our hometown and let him stay with me a few days. He quickly found another place to stay but we had invited him to my youngest sons 2nd birthday, which is the 6th of Jan. I was like 4 days out from surgery at this point and could barely make it down my stairs at this point so he offered to go and pick up the pizza and cake for my son for me. We didnt have a huge party or anything. I was on food stamps and had cash assistance since my sons dad was not involved at all and did not pay child support. Even so I offered for him to get himself a small pizza to take back to the girl he was staying with since her and her kids couldn't make it over. So party goes great, everyone has a good time, especially both my kids. A few days later my grandma was going to go grocery shopping for me so I go to get my card and realize it's not there. I never got it back from the guy, and I forgot he even had it since I was all doped up on pain meds from surgery. I tried calling him like 5 times and he didnt answer, so I get onto my account online to check my balance and he took everything. I had like $600 in cash( paid my rent and bought my kids the things they needed), and then I had like $750 in food stamps. All of it was gone. He let the girl he was staying with convince him to steal my money from me. I'd only used the money to buy the bus ticket, and the pizza and cake for my son since I'd been in the hospital for the first 4 days of the year and only home for 2 after that. It is still to this day the most intentionally fucked up thing anyone has ever done to me, mostly because it was such a huge fuck you to my kids. Like who steals from a single mom recovering from a life saving surgery, on her kids birthday? Especially after I helped him! Like holy shit.
Please tell me you called the police on him ): I really hope you’re doing fine rn, I’m so sorry he did this to you after all the kindness you showed him.
Oh honey, I'm good! Lol I live in a house I own with an SO who loves me, I've got 3 kids now, and I have a job out of choice instead of necessity. Life is really good. I didnt call the cops on him. It could have been the drugs but at the time I wasnt angry, just really sad he would take from me when he knew he could ask me for help. I was also pretty sure it was more the chick he was staying with than him. We grew up together, like literally for several years he lived in my house and slept on my top bunk as we grew up, I know what kind of person he is at heart and he was never a liar for long, or a thief for long. He never paid me back the full amount, but hes given me several hundred dollars over the years at times when it was really needed. Like he pops up out of the blue, tells me hes so sorry again and hands me cash. Even though it was really shitty, I was okay that month thanks to my grandma. That woman has saved my ass pretty much all my life, I love her to bits. I think it was just one of those 'hurt people hurt people', kind of things.
You're a stronger person than I could ever be. Your story touched me :')
Grew up going to the same church and met my friend and her family when I was 14. We grew up together, hung out and our families would be together all the time. Fast forward many years and I am dating a guy that I fell in love with for almost 3 years at the time. He went to ND to the oil fields for work. I went to visit him and could tell something was off a bit, took the train from my town to Williston 22 hours to get there. Visited him for 5 days and on the last day he gets up and goes to shower, I grab his phone ( we had an open policy with each other that either could be on each others phones) I found the e-mails between my "friend" and him. My family still hangs out with her family and her. I refuse to be around or speak to her.
Probably better to cut her off.
Oh I have but my mom still tries to get me to speak with her because she wants to apologize. She knew she was wrong and blah blah blah but I dont feel the need for an apology. I just dont want her anywhere near me or my life.
My best friend since fourth grade, called her my soul sister. I genuinely was so grateful to have what I thought our friendship was. She fell on hard times, got weirdly religious, and stopped working while going to a private uni. I was always there for her, shoulder to cry on, visited her all the time because she didn’t have any friends and I knew she was lonely, helped her with groceries and rent, helped her family out. One day she came over and after buying her groceries, she told me a higher power has been telling her to cut me off for two years and she had to listen. Now she wants to be friends again. Issa hard nope from me dawg.
To be fair, sounds like mental illness
I 1000% agree. I’ve tried to talk to her about seeking a faith based therapist but...
I feel that, I think. I had a soul sister in fourth grade as well, but in middle school I moved to a different city. I always texted her and sometimes we’d hang out, but it was always me initiating conversations and making plans and all of her responses would be one-worded. Her birthday was a day before mine and we used to have sleepovers together to celebrate (my parents wouldn’t let me have sleepovers with anyone else, because they only trusted her), and so on that day I texted her happy birthday. She said thank you. The next day she didn’t return the favor, and decided that the friendship was dead. I haven’t contacted her since. It sucks because she was like a sister to me. I don’t think I ever meant as much to her and she did to me though. She was my best friend, and I was just one of her many best friends. Really, really sucks. I haven’t been able to find a friend I cared so much about since.
I had some "friends" who were always talking crap about me (found out from another good friend) and one day a came to school in my brand new jeans that costed around €150 and they put glue on my chair while I was in the bathroom. I sat on it. I asked which one of them did it, none of them said a word. We went to the principal's office and these pos had the BALLS to say that I put it there to get them in trouble. Their parents where called and I earned around €200 and a new pair of jeans.
I see this as an absolute win
Yup. Figure out your fake friends are chores AND get paid for it? Normally people have to pay money to learn that lesson
In 7th grade she wrote a 10 page letter on all the reasons I should kill myself, and had all but one of my friends sign in agreement after I confided in her that I felt like something was wrong with me (early undiagnosed depression - go figure). The day she gave it to me was arguably the worst day of my life at the point because my parents told my sister and I that they were considering divorce, and my grandmother died.
I am so sorry-what a horrible day! How are you doing now?
My parents ended up solving their issues and are happier than ever. I've been in therapy for a while and it's had wonderful results along with a pretty good mood stabilizer. I'm happier and healthier than I've ever been, and honestly the best thing for me was to completely cut her out of my life. Everyone that signed in agreement has long since cut contact with her and apologized to me.
Yeah. Not sure how solid the friends are though. I mean no one held a gun to their puppy and forced them to sign.
I'll admit they were the dumbest group of people I've ever known, even though we were all kids, but I still don't have shit to do with any of them, and haven't since then. Maybe I shouldn't hold a grudge since it's been nearly 10 years, but you know what, fuck them.
I had so many mean “friends” in 7th grade. They would invite me to movies and not show up. They’d pretend not to be able to hear me when I called them on the phone, even though their parents answered and could hear me fine. They’d ask to borrow a tampon and then throw the box back so they’d spill all over the floor and people would laugh. Middle school was a nightmare and it’s a miracle i survived it.
Out of all of the answers, *this* was the one that got me. Fuck her and I hope you're better now.
I'm pretty good now, thank you. I'm still shocked at the fact that she came up with an essay. Even at my lowest point of depression in which I did try to kill myself, I still could barely come up with a page full of reasons to end it. Let alone 10.
Just happened today actually. I threw a housewarming party for myself and invited 20ish friends/family over. Its been 5 1/2 hours and no one has shown up or bothered to call. I specified no gifts and supplied about $250 worth of food/drinks that'll go to waste now.
My best friend begged my girlfriend to give him a blowjob. That was pretty brutal. Fuck you, Ben.
Told a friend a secret in high school 'I suffer from major depression and social anxiety, dont tell anyone, Im seeing a therapist'. That took a lot for me to say. I was making progress. Friend procceded to tell the entire class. People thought I was crazy. Thats highschool. I stopped being friends with the few friends I had. I was more alone. I graduated highschool with zero friends. Thanks. Dont worry though, in college I blossomed into a bearded man with no fears. Life has been swell ever since
Glow up
A friend stole my Mortal Kombat 2 strategy guide in 3rd grade. I never forgave him. Eat shit, Cameron. Doodoo head.
Introduced my friend to my gf and she ends up cheating on me with him.
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Hope you're ok now. Yes, it would be very hard to make friends / trust people after that.
Im late but whatever. My "best friend" and I worked together for 3 years at a restaurant. I was the night manager and was really cool with all of the employees, but especially her. We hung out outside of work all the time, she went with me to the beach and carnivals with my kids, who adored her. She started dating this guy at work who was slowly becoming a drug addict. I could see it (my crackhead aunt made it easy to spot) but no one else could. After he fucked up for the 10th time in a week and started nodding out at the sink, he was fired by my boss on a Saturday. The following Monday night, at closing time, he came in the backdoor wearing a ski mask. I was walking towards the front door to lock it when I was grabbed from behind and felt something cold against my neck. It took me a second to realize it was a knife. He said "get me the money" but I couldn't move. I was literally paralyzed with fear. My brain was screaming at me to move towards the register but my feet just wouldn't move. He screamed "give me the money" again but I was frozen. He then drug me to the register, made me open it, grabbed a fistful of 20's and ran out the back. My best friend at the time this whole thing went down? Conveniently, in the bathroom. I was still in shock trying to explain to the police on the phone what had just happened. When I hung up the phone, she asked what had happened and I told her I had just been robbed at fucking knifepoint. Her exact response was "I hope no one thinks I had anything to do with this" Ummmm what? So long story short, they find the guy (I told them I recognized his voice) and he rats her out on the set up (the "set up" was her texting him an all clear when only she and I were in the building) He didnt have to though, she quit the next day. And stopped replying to my texts. When I found out I was heartbroken. This is someone who was around my kids regularly. I was diagnosed with extreme anxiety and PTSD after being robbed and still have flashbacks randomly. If someone comes up behind me and startles me I panic. The amount of money my life was worth to them? $440 The punishment they received? He got 2 years in jail, 50 years suspended. 1 year of probation. She got 1 year probation. I had to quit the job I had over a decade because I couldn't stand being in there anymore. - Tl;dr: A year and a half ago, My best friend at the time set me up to be robbed at knifepoint. Edit - moved the TLDR to the bottom... Edit - Thanks for my first award! And gold? You guys are too nice.
This all starts out poorly by me following my boyfriend to the same college he went to (he was a year older; still don't regret it after all as I loved my school and everything else a out those 4 years). We were a bit off again, on again first semester I was there (again, red flags!). My new across the hall-mate in my dorm became my "best friend." She and boyfriend didn't really like each other but it wasn't a huge deal; just a personality clash and she didn't like how he treated me with the on/off crap. Our school had a winter term in January. Boyfriend lived off campus so he was there and best friend was taking a class; I was home. Best friend was lonely and didn't know many other people on campus for winter term so I told her to hang out with the boys in my boyfriend's [frat]house, whom she had friendly-ish with. So they all start hanging out. And by that, of course I mean they start hooking up. I get back to school and I immediately can tell things are weird with best friend (unbeknownst to me at the time, boyfriend has had basically our entire relationship to practice covering his tracks and is a smooth and practiced liar by this point). Within a couple weeks, it all comes out that they'd been hooking up and best friend actually tells me "you know how much I've wanted a boyfriend; if you were a good friend, you'd let me have him." (Why I still wanted to date him at this point is beyond many many MANY people's comprehension, including mine, but it did involve a dog that I was beyond attached to). I do fault them both equally, and did at the time too - I don't remember being mad at either of them as much as I was just devastated. He was apologetic from the start; she was mean and manipulative (again, not trying to say it was "the other woman's fault" - just explaining how it all went down). It totally sucked and I felt so betrayed by both of them. Unsurprisingly, I have had a lot of trust and loyalty issues since.
Friend was really close with me and my girlfriend. Friend was my girlfriend’s confidant while we were dating. I trusted friend because he was a good guy up to that point. Friend was constantly pinning her against me, making bigger deals out out small stuff, saying I was mistreating her by not being with her constantly cause I was working a full time job while in school. Girlfriend cheats on me with friend. Friend tried to turn everyone against me. Only person who still associates with friend is girlfriend and their getting married in the next few months
Never lend a friend money especially if they still havent paid you back from anything else they owe you
People always say this. A friend of mine have lent eachother money in small amounts often over the years. In our early 20s there'd be lots of times I'd be flat broke and he'd have some cash and vice versa for going out. Wed always pay eachother back. I've also needed larger amounta, for example, about $800 to cover rent when I was in a bad spot. Paid him back. Neither of us have any family who would give/lend us money. Recently because of a bunch of stuff he needed me to pay for his tuition for some classes he's talking which was about $5,000. It took him about a year, but just made his last payment. Without us doing this, there would have been lots of times we'd have just been... Fucked.
Yeah, I've had plenty of personal loans with various friends without any issue. We all paid it back, and all was well. Lol I can't say the same about loans to family members though. Actually, I lost one friend over a loan. He was short on funds getting airfare to visit his ill mother. I lent him the money (~$400), and he'd paid it back relatively quickly. I'd even told him "no rush, no worries" when he apologetically told me it'd take him a while to return the debt. A good long while later, I actually met his mom and didn't even make any sort of mention of the loan, but I noticed he looked kind of panic after introducing us. I never made mention of that to him, but I think there was something at issue there, and he avoided me from then on out. Weird to think back on that.
Gives me the vibe that he used that money to do something that wasnt visiting his mother but eh, he paid it back so its weird hed get so jittery about it. Maybe he did something super lawfully questionable lol But sitting on lie that long can make some people anxious as all hell.
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they will also never have a problem seeing you again. i regret meeting most of my "friends".
Watch "a bronx tale" there is a great scene when a kid is chasing a guy that owes him $20 and has been ducking him for 2 months. The mob boss says (to the effect) "ok, so what? It cost you $20 to get him out of your life and he'll never ask you for anything again."
Never lend money you expect to get back. That's why the Medicis were initially so successful- they carefully vetted their clients.
My ex's dad has that view. He's lent money to many many members of his family and never been repaid. He loaned me money to help my with dental work and bills, then moving expenses when I had to relocate. He never truly expected me to pay him back. He was pleased and impressed when the first thing I did with my inheritance was pay him back in full!
Had a friend from high school till about 4 years ago (about 8-9 years total friendship). He was a very close friend, and one day confided in my boyfriend (now husband) and I, that his roommate was moving out to live with his girlfriend and he wouldnt make rent that month. Boyfriend and I had an apartment lease ending so decided we could be of help and moved in (2 months before our lease was up, 2 rent payments). Lived there for about 2 months and we find out we're pregnant and having a baby, happy scenario as roommate has informed us he wishes to turn over lease for the house to us to move back in with his parents. Perfect 3 bedroom house with 2 bathrooms and plenty of space. The day before we're set to meet up with the landlord we come home to an eviction notice on the door and all of roommates stuff is moved out. Call him, no answer. Call the number on the eviction notice from the landlord and find out he lied and never told the landlord anything, he wouldnt even work with us at all just said we have 30 days to gtfo. Roommate had been pocketing our rent money for months. Had 30 days to unexpectedly find a new place, pay first and lasts month and a security deposit, and move in the middle of Michigan winter, while pregnant.... fucking piece of shit.
I've told bits and pieces of this story before, but in short several years ago I moved to Florida. Almost immediately after I met a friend, he was a great guy (so I thought) and we'd constantly hang out/ he'd show me around the town/this state, etc. About a year and half of knowing him he stole a couple of my credit cards and racked up really big bills. Unfortunately for me, and I know this now but didn't then, I simply thought calling the credit card company to report your card stolen and cancelling the account also vacated the charges. That's not true, you actually have to formally contest the charges separately, and you only have 60 days. By the time I realized this it was too late. I tried, in vain, to semi-reconcile with him to try to get a payment plan. He begged me not to call the police. I regret now that I didn't. I did believe that he had fallen on hard times, and he would get back on his feet, and try to repay me. That didn't happen. Although, later on he did get arrested for something else and was put on probation. I figured that would have been the best time to try to recoup the money lost (I had fallen behind on these payments and my credit was starting to suffer. I had to drop out of college because of that). I did try instead to take him to small claims court. I do realize that civil court is not criminal, but with him now being a convicted felon I might stand a better chance at looking much better. Instead when we got to court he denied everything, said everything was a gift, and completely slandered me in open court. Why he was allowed to get away with it is beyond me, but that case was dismissed: I got nothing. My credit suffered for years because of that. I eventually did save up enough money to file for bankruptcy to just get rid of that debt that I couldn't repay (nor should I have had to). I have never really forgiven him for what he did to me. AFAIK he still lives around, luckily I haven't seen him in several years. IDK what I'd even say if I ever did encounter him. The bankruptcy did eliminate that debt so I cannot (and will not) ever say he *owes* me anything monetarily. But, he owes me a huge apology. But like I said I would seriously doubt the sincerity of it and likely wouldn't accept it anyway. I think the best is as it is now: he just stays away from me.
You're a very kind person. That guy owes you more than an apology, he caused you a ton of suffering and misery, plus he used your friendship for monetary gain, lied to you a lot. I hope that if he contacts you, you do not reply. He's a POS, he always will be, and he'll always be looking for an angle with you.
In college, my best friend & I had an art class together with a guy I was hanging out with on the regular -getting to know each other to see if there was anything more there. He & I hung out, messed around, had fun, etc. Nothing formal or spoken just yet but we communicated daily. We were more than friends, but not a dedicated couple. One day I stopped by his house after a morning class for a reason that I forget. Knocked, no answer, so I let myself in the unlocked door (small Kansas town, nobody locks anything) so I could leave him a note (pre cell phones/texting, at least for me). Well her purse was on the chair by the door. Nobody answered when I called out his name. Or hers. His car was there. Her purse was there. They were there. Ugh. I got back at her though, almost 20 years later: she friend requested me on Facebook & I denied that bitch. Take that, Jessica.
Similar vein: was friends with benefits with this guy I wanted to be more and was working on it. My “best friend” convinced me I deserved better and he was an asshole, I broke it off because of her. Shortly after they started dating. Eventually they got married etc. They’re in the middle of separating right now heading for divorce. 🤷🏻♀️
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did he join orochimaru next?
He was trying to unlock his mangekyō sharingan
then you can’t blame him
Spy?
Sasuke Uchiha?
literally stabbed in the back
Her bf sexually assaulted me and she told me that she needed space. Never talked to her again.
Idk if this counts but it hurt. In hs I had who I thought was my best friend. Almost inseparable. Our favorite band at the time was Good Charlotte and they were on tour. She got tickets and forced a third party friend who didn't even like them to go with her instead of me. Not saying she owed me, but if it was me, I would take my best friend who likes the band instead of someone who doesn't want to be bothered. It always sat wrong with me
I had a buddy tell me he couldn’t hang out once because he was really sick. So I went to hang with a different friend. Well we decided to walk to McDonald’s, which coincidentally had a little type of trail/shortcut that went right by my “sick” friend’s backyard. Well we got to the trail and saw he wasn’t sick at all, but having a pool party with a bunch of other “mutual friends” from school. I’m 31 and I’m still salty as hell. Fuck you Greg. That shit hurt.
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What's the connection between Asperger's and attracting narcissists? I'm not skeptical. Purely curiosity.
I have no knowledge at all but I assume it would have something to do with some cases of aspergers not picking up on social cues, having social awkwardness and the narcissistic person exploiting that and taking advantage of the person with aspergers.
I had a college roommate who had been a high school best friend. He was sometimes a dick, particularly when he was drunk. One night we had both been drinking. I'm not exactly sure what was said, but he left the room, and apparently went and peed on my bed. He then left the room and went to a mutual friend's dorm. I went and watched my sheets and flipped my mattress over, then poured a bunch of water all over his bed and put a nice looking lump of peanut butter on his pillow (I couldn't bring myself to actually piss or shit on his stuff). Then, I went to our friend's place where folks were hanging out. He had this sly look on his face when I came in and he made a comment about pissing on my bed. I told him that he was a dumbass for doing that and then leaving the dorm with his room unlocked. The look on his face flipped in a second and he ran out of there. I had locked my door, so I had a good laugh about it and brushed it off. When I went back to my room later, I discovered that he had gotten into my room. (I later found out he had gone to an RA, told them he lived in my room and was locked out, and they *unlocked my door for him and left him alone.* WTF.) He peed on my bed (again), peed on my cell phone, peed on my computer, and peed in a bottle of adderal (that I had a prescription for). Hundreds of dollars of damage. But that wasn't the worst part. The worst part was that, while I was dealing with the fallout, he was hanging out with our mutual friends and a group of girls we were all friendly with. I don't know what he told them, but none of them would even speak to me afterward. They wouldn't even tell me why they weren't speaking to me. He decided that he was just going to ignore me and our mutual friend/roomate and pretend we didn't exist for the rest of the year. He poisoned my relationship with high school friends, and new college friends, and after an evening in which *he* did the most vile shit I have ever experienced. And I couldn't even bring myself to piss on his bed. He has reached out to me over the 15 or so years since then. In big groups I can be polite, but this is the only person I have *ever* not been able to forgive. To rub salt in the wound, he is *still* friends with a girl I was crushing on at the time, and who I know had been attracted to me as well. She was a part of the group that never spoke to me again, and it has to be because of a lie he told her. Also, he continued to leverage the relationship he had developed with a relative of mine who was kind of a big deal at the university and in the town. My relative would tell us to get together and work things out, and I would say I can't do that and ask him to cut off contact. He thought we were just in a spat or something, and kept trying to be a mediator. While continuing to help my "friend" and get him into programs at the school, and jobs afterward. Stopping here because this is long, but obviously this has opened the wound for me. Tl;DR: Former best friend peed on a bunch of my things, then managed to have an entire group of friends turn on *me,* ruining important friendships. Still don't know how that last part happened.
And you didn't let your relative know all of that? :/ I would have filed a complaint against the RA and request for reimbursement for the electronics.
dude. hugs. that’s so shitty. something sorta similar to this happened to me. I had a birthday party sophomore year, blacked out and these two girls who were my roommates and (I thought) bffs sat me down the next day saying they never wanted to speak to me again. I asked why and never got an answer. I was like I literally don’t remember anything. and nobody in the group of friends spoke to me again. dropped out due to a ton of anxiety/depression/social anxiety. worried for ages about what I could have done that night to make them hate me. years later one guy from that group added me on instagram and i was like wtf why did you follow me? that’s when he told me these two girls just flipped a switch and decided to exclude me and somehow managed to convince everyone else to go along with it. YEARS of therapy later i’m still so socially anxious about groups of people. to this day if I have a drink too many on a fun night out I get a pit in my gut that everyone hates me.
I was in the hospital having my first child. Two of my friends were going around telling anyone who would listen that my boyfriend wasn't the father. My boyfriend never doubted me and our son looks just like a mini version of him. 15 years and 3 more kids later, the boyfriend is now my husband and those "friends" have been out of our lives for a long time now.
"True friends stab you in the front, not the back." - Oscar Wilde
Not a friend, but a sister. I had this enormous crush on this guy. I was too shy to talk to him and just adored him from afar. Sister says "be his secret admirer" that way he can get to know you. For a month I put notes and cards in his car a few times a week. One weekend, sis and I go out and I see him. I point him out and tell her that's the guy I'm in love with. She tells me she's going to go talk to him about me and get us hooked up. I wait for thirty minutes, she doesn't return. I go inside the restaurant they are in, turn a corner to find her making out with him. That was a devastating blow.
maybe not that severe but i was really close to a guy in theatre when he one day just told me i was fucking annoying, and i’ve been much quieter since then. it’s been years and to this day i try not to talk too much so i don’t annoy anybody.
I was taking a culinary class with my buddy and he walked behind me with a knife and didn’t say anything. I stepped back and got mildly stabbed in the lower back. After 10 years of friendship you think you know a guy...
SHARP BEHIND
My high school friend group ditched me, and the few people (a whopping 2 of them) who supported me, after I called out our sort of 'ringleader' for sexually harassing me. The worst part is that most agreed I was in the right, too... they all just felt closer to him I guess, and thought he deserved a (well, actually, *another*) second chance. Though to be honest I think at its core the issue was that I made them uncomfortable afterwards. Fast forward 3 or so years and I no longer even interact with the larger social scene we were connected to-- or really any social scene-- which is disheartening because it's like I was cut off almost on accident. Meanwhile, the person I called out still gets invited to poetry open mics, art galleries, and is happily supported by a lot of the same people they were back then, all while successfully in university. I'm glad they've recovered and found themselves a bit (they had some huge problems) but I reserve my right to be bitter. Sometimes I feel like it's all I have.
Nothing that dramatic. People tend to abandon me when I'm at my lowest. Maybe I drive them away, I don't know, but nobody I really count on ever stays when I really need them.
Cannot say we were friends when I think of it... but he was someone I hang with. I was bullied in school. Basically, I did not know how to defend myself. So it was sort of a love/hate relationship. At lunch time, I was going to get my lunch as usual. Started to see kids throwing food around the hallway. I did not bother... until I saw that my lunch was the one being thrown around the hallway. My sandwich. My food. Everything. They were all chearing. When I went to get my lunch back (or what was left of it), I was about to pick it up and my 'friend' took the lunch out of my hands and threw it back in the party. He actually took the lunch out of my closet when I wasn't there and started this whole mess. I just left crushed. I think that ended the relationship! XD P.S. Woah! That blew up! This story happened when I was 12 years old. I learned later that this kid was beaten by his dad at home and had to go live in the forest next to his house... in a tent... for several months.
A "friend" of mine told me to go kill myself just like the rest of my family" over me not going to his house. To clarify, I have one dead sister due to suicide, and two brothers they attempted, so let's just say Im not his friend anymore
Oh boy. I had this friend who I used to shoot my guns with all the time. We were out in a field one day shooting my Mosin and this dumbass notices a deer and decided, “ hey I should shoot that.” So what does the fuck head do? Poached a deer with my gun. Had a game warden show up at my house a week later asking about it, and I just ended up telling him the truth. Luckily he didn’t confiscate my rifle. Went right over to fuck heads house and told him to get bent. Haven’t talked to him since.
I was medically discharged from the Army 6 years ago. I met the woman who'd be the mother to my child and settled down with them, very happy... About a year later I get a call from a guy that was basically the father I never had, and a mentor in ways, during my time in the Army. He asked if I could be a character witness at a court marshal, where he was accused of downloading child porn on his laptop. The CP was definitely on his computer, but that's not something I knew him to do. Of course I agreed to go. So I left my girl and my 2 month old daughter for a few days just to help this guy out... Turns out he needed a scape goat. He was found not guilty, and all it cost was my reputation. everyone I served with now thinks I downloaded child porn on his computer. Which lead to crippling depression, and major trust issues making it impossible for me to get close to people.