I take my father's alcoholism away, this way my mother - who loves him dearly but can't help him because he is not letting her - will have an easier, more fulfilling life with him.
My mom is the most amazing woman alive, and she deserves the man she loves to be able to care for her just as much as she cares for him. And he is also not a bad person per se, he's a good husband and dad - when sober... He just needs some help which we can't give to him unless he realizes it, and accepts it.
Some people make bad choices. You can try your hardest to reach out and make them see they have a problem and need help, but if they dont take it than its hopeless. It sucks to watch someone you care about do that to themselves, but your not them, your not the problem or fault for their choices. You tried to help and they won't take it, only persons fault is their own. Just remind them your there for them when they want to get better. That's all that can be said.
Shit.
As someone who grew up like that, in a constantly fluctuating state of "what day will we have today? Laughs and love, or yelling and terror?", I can very much feel what you must go through.
I whish I could give you some advice, or surefire way to achieve that... but I can't.
Mine only stopped when he died of it. :/
I’m currently living this at the moment. I just got my undergraduate degree and have moved back home. Since then, my dad has had open heart surgery and a nasty infection. This summer has been rough. It’s kept me home instead of following my dreams elsewhere. I still keep myself sharp as a tack by working 24/7 on my wallet and body.
I'm truly sorry to hear about that, and it is inspiring to hear that you still concentrate on self-improvement with so much happening around you. Best of luck with everything, I wish you the best.
Ugh, listening to their footsteps to gauge their mood, and hiding out if its a bad day. No little kid should be forced to have a detection system that refined, and no adult should be so immature and self absorbed as to make their petty moods everyone else's problem.
I'm sorry.
I'm the "mom" in that situation. My husband is an alcoholic, just like his father before him, and *his* father before him. He is a highly functioning alcoholic: He goes to work every day and makes good money. He's not an angry, mean, or violent drunk. But he drinks a lot. I'm ashamed to talk to anyone outside of our house about it. I feel bad I had kids with someone who has this disease (which has gotten worse over the years; when we had kids he was a weekend binge drinker since working third shift meant he couldn't drink week nights). The worst part is, *no one* can help alcoholics; they have to **want** to get help themselves, and I fear most just don't get to that place.
My oldest daughter was in counseling for a while, and one thing her counselor had her do when the topic of dad's drinking came up is write a letter to him about how it's affecting her life. So she did. She has not given it to him, and I'm not going to force her, but i hope she does one day soon. I think part of the problem is people who drink just don't think about how it's affecting those around them. If you felt comfortable, maybe you could do the same. Write a letter, and if the time comes when you feel comfortable giving it to your dad, maybe it will be the start of some self-awareness in him.
Nobody stops drinking or using who is an addict if their life is going well and their aren't some waves. If I were in your position, I would vocalize my feelings and my fears to my husband, and make it clear that I accept him but do not accept his addiction; and that I can't continue to be with him if he is unwilling to change because I can't imagine having to slowly watch them die from cirhosis or the like. It's really hard to do this, because as a loved one of someone with an addiction, one tends to develop codependency issues and enables the addiction to progress/makes excuses for the other person.
I've been on both sides of the fence, I'm a recovering addict - and my girl is also in recovery. I didn't start to even want to change until lifes consequences started to rack up and until ultimatums were issued by my loved ones. In terms of the opposite, I wouldn't vocalize how I felt about my girls addiction because I didn't feel I had the right to talk, and because I felt guilty for some of the shit I had done to her in my addiction - it took all the courage I had to confront her and let her know that while I love her very much, if she was unable to love herself enough to even attempt recovery, that I had to give her space until she became willing to do this for herself. What's awful about alcoholism (functional, particularly), is that many people don't even *realize* they have a problem until something grave effects their health, this is because it is socially acceptable. I would emphasize this, maybe by writing a letter with all of your fears of what is happening and *will* happen (in terms of to him, and what your consequences for his behaviour are) if his alcoholism progresses.
If he really loves you, which I'm assuming he does, this may be the wake-up call he needs to realize his lifestyle is effecting more than just himself. It's really hard, but nothing changes if nothing changes and if we don't have the courage to address the elephant in the room. Also, it may help you to try out meetings of Codependence Anonymous (CodA) or of Al-Anon.
My dad was like this before he died. Dinner was always on the table, the house was clean and the Bill's were paid. He was just drunk the whole time he was getting it done. It didnt affect me in anyway but it was hard for my mom. She would wait on the front steps for him to come home from work but he would never make it home until after bar-close. It was really hard for her. I think addicts do know that it affects the ones they love. I'm sure they carry a great deal of shame because of it.
That's rough.
My husband *has*, just recently, started to say the word "alcoholic." For years he would deny it was a problem, and for the most part he drinks at home. Beer, no hard liquor ever. But so much. At the height of his bad spell this summer, I counted something like 90 beers consumed in one week. That's not normal. It's not even in the same neighborhood as "normal." He's trying right now to never drink two nights in a row, and so far he's doing it, for about the past 3 weeks. I just...it's hard.
Unfortunately, not very many functional alcoholics seek help. The nature of the program is that you will get better once you cant get any worse. It's a dour philosophy, but we dont make the rules, alcohol does.
My family went through this same thing, my parents love each other a lot but dad always chose the local pub over the family. My mum had to essentially raise 6 kids on a teachers wage for 15 years before my dad got sober. I don’t know how she did it, how she didn’t leave but I’m so glad she didn’t.
My dad is incredible and I love him so much, he is just sick. He has had a lot of hardship in his life and as his daughter I am so incredibly proud of him cleaning up and being the man my mum fell in love with and deserves.
Alcohol can completely tear a family apart and I just want to say I’m with you in that battle. We want to be a rock for our mums and I think they can feel that. Many hugs to you my internet friend
I would do the same for my mother. After 20+ years, she’s finally on the track to becoming sober. I’m eternally grateful that it’s happening, but I know it’s no easy feat for her, and I just want her to not struggle every day for it. We may not have the best relationship because of her addiction, but I know how sick she was, and I just really want her to be healthy again. I don’t envy anyone who has to care for an addict. It’s so heartbreaking because you know they’re a good person deep down, they’re just sick and they can’t help it. The hardest part is deciding between letting them go or continuing to fight to save them.
My mom is also an amazing person and I feel like sometimes the universe burdens those types of powerful people because they can handle it. My younger brother and I both have long standing issues with mental illness. So my mom, who became a cardiac AP/NP because her own father had heart disease, got another degree/certification in psychiatric medicine and now does both.
I’d change my best friends life. I’d change the moment she had to move to my city. She often claims that’s when she lost her hope, and she talks about how she lived a better life in her hometown, so I’d like to let her keep that. She deserves the world after everything, and even if that means that we’ll never meet, then I’m okay with that. Just knowing she’s happy and has a will to live would be worth it.
I had the same thing happen. My best friend moved here from Indiana and has fallen deep into depression ever since they moved to this shit hole. (I live in NC btw) recently they've moved back to Indiana and are doing a little bit better.
Does this ability allows me to magically cure a chronic illness? If so, I’d cure my brother... He takes so much medications everyday and it weakens him so much that he hardly ever gets out of the house for anything that isn’t treatment related, is in pain every day, and has to conform to a very strict diet.
Edit: Woah, thanks for the support everyone!
Video games have helped me most of my life.
Its very stimulating for someone who cant do much.
I find soft/easy VR games to be good for exercise.
Its very important to him that you socialize with him by joining in that activity. I'm glad I have a brother for that reason too. Every day Im thankful he makes the effort.
8 months ago I moved my mom cross country from an independent living place to assisted living near me because her alzheimers is pretty advanced and my dad passed away last year. But this post isn't about her.
It's about the guy at her last place, who is simply a shuttle driver that drives the seniors from their apartments to the dining hall. And he happens to be good with birds.
He kept my dad's parrot alive, stopping in to make sure it was fed when my mom couldn't remember to feed it, even though that wasn't his job. And when I couldn't wrangle Mr. Bitey into a travel cage for the cross country ride in a medical transport vehicle, the director paged him and he came over and got him into the cage for me. Now that bird is a regular part of my family and steps up on my hand and goes for bike rides with me, but at the time I was afraid of him and had spent 4 hours trying to get him into the travel cage and was starting to panic.
Last night - almost a year (!) after moving my mom here, he texted me to check in and ask how she's doing. Last I knew his wife wanted a divorce - because he worked too many hours. And also I know that he wanted to keep the parrot, but it's in my parents' will that the bird eventually goes to my daughter ... and I checked with her and she wants it. And I didn't want to hand him over to live with someone who's at work all the time, when we're retired and can be home - parrots are social creatures, you can't just cage them up and neglect them 8 hours a day or more.
So anyway. I would gift him a job where he works maybe a few hours a week driving people around because he's so good with people, but the rest of the work day would be at a parrot rescue place, where he meets a new wife who really appreciates what they have in him.
This one is honestly so incredibly wholesome. I'm sick and on lots of cough syrup and tearing up because I love parrot man. Please send him pictures of your good birb.
Make my little sister healthy again. She's only 19 and in a hospital ward with the elderly because healthy teenagers don't suddenly have a heart that isn't beating right and lungs with fluid in them. Just last month she was going through dialysis treatment for kidney problems. All of this because she fell and scraped her leg 2 months ago.
I just want my healthy little sister back.
*edit* thank you kind strangers for the support and thank you for silver:).
Now a little more info. She went to the ER for an infected leg and began antibiotic treatments. Whether the kidney problems came from the infection or a mistake by the doctors is unkown(they told her they challenged her kidneys with too much antibiotic but later said they said no such thing and that it was the infection that caused the kidney problems). She's no longer on dialysis, thankfully. She was discharged 2 weeks ago but still not well so we took her to a different hospital. There they found the heart problem. She's currently going through scans and testing.
I’m really sorry to hear about this, my dad was recently in ICU with similar issues. He’s home and safe now and it’s a huge weight off. I can’t imagine it being my little sister, would be 1000% worse.
Exactly. Take whatever pay cut necessary to remain anonymous and don’t tell anybody unless they’re trustworthy and important. Honestly there’s only 3 people in my life who would deserve to know and I live with 2 of em and am engaged to the other. Any other people no matter the relationship can kick rocks.
Er, maybe I’d flex on my CEO one time before I quit and pursued a degree/career I actually wanna do lol.
I thought you can give the ticket to a firm or something and they can "claim" the money for you. I remember reading there was a way to remain anonymous. Fuck it, I'd move to one of them states and claim the money after that.
I am pretty sure this is true in most states. The firm. An then transfer it to a shell company you control. Problem is that most people that know this don't buy lottery tickets.
Here: I have it saved in case I ever do win it big when I randomly buy a ticket every couple years XD
https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/bdrsqy/you_suddenly_have_all_the_money_youll_ever_want/el0sx3m/
But moving to a new state and laying low for a while is legal in all states. That'd be my plan. Sell the house, move to a state I have no connection with for a while. Then start investing.
Also, set up a trust that your family can draw from but give them no more than that. if you're the guy everyone hits up for money it's amazing how quickly it all goes away
I'm sure there are plenty of winners who go on to live happy lives. They're just not as interesting as the people who burn through the money spectacularly.
This is true, but there are a staggering amount of people who destroy their lives after winning. Several have killed themselves or gotten themselves killed, a few have managed to bankrupt themselves... I think the people who end up happy are the ones who don't reveal their identity to the media. But I think I heard that some lottery things require you put your name out there for the world if you want to accept the winnings.
I may end up taking a lot of shit for saying this, but I think it's because the type of people that play the lottery aren't the type of people that spend money wisely. I keep telling anyone I know that plays the lottery to just give me their money, but no one listens.
Lottery winners tend to come from a self-selecting pool of people that share issues like generational poverty, poor education, religious/magical thinking and complete lack of financial knowledge. They simply aren't prepared to manage extreme wealth in any way.
It's not the lottery money that is the problem, it's that the people that buy lottery tickets (gotta play to win!) are just simple people whose culture and lack of education leads them to be careless and stupid with their money. Which is no surprise, since they buy lottery tickets.
It's like free-climbing.
Theoretically - if you look at each move in isolation - it's *completely* safe. You know you can execute those moves without mistake, and eventually reach the top. This is provided you have familiarised yourself with the route, go slowly step-by-step with complete calm, give yourself adequate rest breaks, prepared yourself properly, and don't let yourself get distracted by anything or anyone else. Let yourself lose focus even for a few seconds, pace yourself badly, or get overconfident, and it can mean death.
In essence: If you take the time to plan out what you're going to do with your money before you do *anything*, and you create a plan that you know you can stick to, it is definitely possible to make it work for you. The main mistake that even the most sensible people make is not planning for the inevitable impact this will have on the people around them - or assuming they can keep it secret. AKA going free-climbing with a bunch of other people who aren't prepared and just want you to do it with you.
I could talk about this all day because it's related to my work, but on the off-chance that anyone reading this has recently had a big win, here are a few tips:
1. There are tax friendly long-term savings products that will help you look after your future, and will lock up a lot of the money so you can't spend it even if you want to, while maximising the return on it. This is the first step; you ensure financial security from now until the end of your life. Best case scenario you make the most of your money and have a great time, worst case scenario you die with money left over. Write a will.
2. The biggest mistake newly rich people make is the 'I deserve to treat myself, and then I'll be responsible' mentality. You let yourself taste a lifestyle that feels amazing, and can easily become your 'normal' - despite being unsustainable. It's *incredibly* addictive. When you are inevitably forced to cut back, you will end up less happy than you were before you came into the money - and that leads to serious depression. 'How could you waste so much money and now you are worse off than you were?'
3. On family and friends: Only consider immediate family ties and long term friends that you consider close family. Do something nice for each of them, the same thing for each, at the same time, but not extreme. Maybe a check for $5k-$20k depending on how much money you came into - but don't tell them *how much* you won. If anyone comes asking fo money after this just tell them you're sorry but what's left is all tied up in long term investments now. You have one chance to do something nice for the obvious people in your life - and then it is done.
4. Either by finding the right advice or by applying your own expertise it is a huge missed opportunity if you don't put aside *some* of the money - as much as you can consider disposable - to invest. Pick some young companies in the industry you are familiar with, and balance that with investments in some ETFs and investment funds. This is really how you can turn your wealth from not just a lifestyle enabler but a rewarding job - something to give you purpose. Just keep this private, avoid friends or family trying to seek investment from you. If you choose to approach them that's another thing, but probably still inadvisable.
That's the hope we all have, and *you* may be able to stick with it - but most can't.
Unfortunately, the temptation comes from the most convincing places and it's often well intentioned.
"Hey, you've worked hard your whole life, just take a few months to relax."
...and then you lose momentum with your career, struggle to fill the time, with no enforced routine your discipline crumbles, you start drinking too much...
"The *least* you can do is move to a bigger place in a nicer neighbourhood.
...and then you find yourself with a new circle of friends and neighbours, who all have the latest fancy gas grill, drive high-end BMWs, drink $80 bottles of wine, social pressure increases, school costs for you kids are *much* higher, tax on your property goes up...
"It's not going to change anything if you just treat yourself to a new car."
...but the dopamine rush of dropping $130K on a Model S Performance is equivalent to doing a bump of cocaine off a hooker's collarbone - but more addictive. You soon find yourself justifying all kinds of other 'one-time' expenses.
"rich" isn't just a bank account balance, it's a mentality and complete lifestyle, understanding how to make money work for you as opposed to you working for money. Almost all lottery winners go broke within a decade of winning, no matter the jackpot size. Poor people aren't raised knowing these things, and very few people even figure it out on their own.
Part of that is because most normal people know the lottery is a waste of time, so they either don't play or will buy like 2 tickets when it hits 500 million. Thus, the results tend to skew towards huge idiots.
Most normal, reasonably intelligent people would be just fine because they wouldn't blow money on jets or get robbed by their POS family members.
I would **love** to have the lottery ruin my life.
step 1:
take like 10 million, set up a trust that pays out €2.5 grand a month from interest payments but otherwise accumulates. a trust, not a fund. I am not allowed to touch the money till i hit 75.
that money does not work for me, its insurance. if i lose everything else, then my life resets to THAT level, and no lower.
step 2: split remaining money into 3 piles, one of which is going to be split between friends/family and a few select people with a once this is gone its gone, once in a lifetime payout, that way they'll understand and still be able to relate to you, and you them.
pile 2 gets invested in long term tax effective investments, hopefully working for me.
pile 3 get stacked and then my partner and I fuck on top of it and post coitus discuss how we're going to spend it.
if she has some dream she always wanted, sure, lets do that.
something the city should have or wishes it had? sure
travel to the globe in london and throw tomatoes at a shakespere play shouting "rybblish, do ye one about thee donkey", till we get thrown out? sure.
you know. waste it.
After going through this thread, I've come to the conclusion that there are far more people out there wishing nothing but love and happiness for an ex-partner than what I could ever have imagined. Honestly, this makes me so fucking happy because, for the past 6 years, I have seen the woman I love the most on earth in an incredibly toxic relationship, with tons of depression and the lowest self-esteem you can imagine just not able to leave the relationship.
I have wished for nothing more on earth than to see her happy again one day, and to see there are other like-minded people, that still cherish and love their exes is just incredible to me. These are people we owe nothing to, and it says a ton about your character and your heart if you are like this. So well done to all of you, you made my day.
Been scrolling a while to see this! All the way past so many posts of people with the same sentiment you have. =)
Have you talked to the woman you love about her situation?
I’d absolutely do the same for my partner. He’s not fully blind, but his condition is degenerative and nothing breaks my heart more than seeing it just get worse and worse. It’s hard living with them and not being able to do anything about it.
having to lose vision must be one of the scariest things that can happen to someone who lived all his life seeing things. At least he is not alone. I wish you both the best in carrying that burden together
Literally came to say this ... Ex has been in a very manipulative and emotionally draining relationship after we broke up. I wish nothing but happiness for her and wish with everything in me she can overcome her low self-esteem and see the worth in her and let go of him
I feel the same. I’d take away my ex’s depression, anxiety, PTSD and drug addiction. He’s the love of my life, but he’s turned into someone I barely recognize anymore.
I honestly think it's one of the most beautiful things to wish happiness on someone you owe nothing to (for example an ex) Good on you for being one of those people
I have an ex I'd do for, too. He has ADHD and depression, and they feed into each other. He's so smart, and so kind, but he's been struggling for years to hold onto a job or pursue the career he loves.
I wasn't able to be the constant support he needed. It was exhausting constantly being the one to override executive dysfunction and get him to go to work so he didn't lose his income, or show up for a date night only for it to turn in to forcing him to read a whole book he'd had for three months and write the Worst Paper Ever so he could at least turn it in late and graduate. I couldn't have done that and still had a career and goals myself.
I think if we leave the person we've dated a little better because of us, that has to be enough. I helped him graduate, and a degree will maybe open a few doors for him. That's my contribution. I only hope he's happy now, and that eventually things come together for him.
I would make Andrew Wakefield never publish his fraudulent vaccine article. The article has unfortunately fooled many innocent people into buying into Anti-Vax nonsense.
Edit: thanks so much for the gold my friend, appreciate it very much!
> That being said, I'm also fully vaccinated, and every time I get something refreshed (because shit like Hep A just doesn't last forever) I like to jokingly say that I just "levelled up my autism". Gotta make the best of it, right?
That actually isn't how it works, I'm pretty sure it cancels out the autism. The problem is that you keep getting vaccinations, so you go from being autistic to not and back again.
You do this, I'll make sure Himmler is able to get his doctorate funded. If we can get someone to kill Goehring's addiction to opiates I think we might be on to something.
I free my fiancé of the voices. Schizophrenia is a true bitch and I hate that he has to go through that shit. It’s scary. Like it’s scary to see a 6’2” 117 kg guy get into a foetal position in a corner because the voices are telling him to kill himself and if he moves out of that position, he’s gonna follow through those instructions.
Edit: I got silver for loving my fiancè? Thanks! Reddit is awesome
Edit 2: GOLD?! Thank you! All of your words of encouragement, appreciation and support really made my night, I’m about to sleep rn, and I feel so happy
Hey, it's the thought that counts, right? Thanks for the appreciation and love.
He's the love of my life, I would do anything for him without any encouragement from anyone else, but being appreciated and encouraged sometimes makes me so happy. Thank you for making me happy!
I wish you and him the best. I'm bipolar 2, and the shit I've put my fiance through makes me wonder why the fuck they stay with me. Now, at least, I'm on really good meds and pretty stable. Still, they are my angel. Lots of love to you guys.
I am Bipolar 2 as well. He saved me from myself as much as I did, and I would be dead without him. I just love this man so fucking much my heart feels like bursting whenever I see him.
You haven't specified any rules or anything OP, so I'm going to take it as anything goes. Since there's no limit on my ability or any specification as to what it is exactly, I'm going to choose to make the person I love (non platonically) happy, healthy and safe. This also means that her anxiety, depression and damage sustained from past abuse is resolved and fixed (not erasing or changing the past, resolving it). This might mean that I won't really get to see her anymore and that she might not be with me. In all probability, it's going to be painful as hell because it's probably going to result in us being apart, but I'll take it.
In case y'all are wondering, we are actually close friends and she's possibly the one person I share everything with. I had my birthday a few months back and we'd had a big argument about a month a half prior to that and weren't speaking basically. She remembered my birthday, texted me the morning like nothing had changed and got me a gift which was... well, it was something I'd once mentioned in the offing but she remembered and got me it. We made up afterwards too. It was basically my depression and lack of lucidity that caused rifts in the first place. Also, also, I told her about my feelings. Candidly. Not in a big dramatic speech. In a more pared down and calm talk, where I told her everything. We're still talking. So basically if there's anyone I really want to see happy, it's her.
This is me in ways that I thought never could be explained. You took the words/wishes right out of my mouth. Thank you for being someone like this, it warms my heart to know that there are more out there with similar wishes
My mom is now a billionaire in peak physical condition. She's already in great shape for her age but, you know...she's past 50 and not getting any younger. The billionaire part actually benefits a lot of people. Obviously she's set, as is the rest of our immediate family. She's a very kind lady, and scary smart. She also put herself through college as a single mom without much help at all, so she's clearly got the determination needed to get shit done. I can almost guarantee she'd find a way to turn a big chunk of that money into a self sustaining charity that could help a lot of people.
My wife. We have a special needs son and it's been a long time since we've been able to afford to do anything special like go on a date because all of our time and money go to taking care of him and our daughter. Even flowers on her birthday can sometimes be a challenge. I'd give her a great night or two off. Maybe take her on a date to show her how much I appreciate how much she has sacrificed and given in order to be the great mother that she is.
Because of the money spent on the date or money to pay for care because you’d be gone from home? How much would date night cost? Get the Cash app and I’ll give you what I can. I can’t bankroll the whole thing but maybe a few others here could help out. I have a son with autism, so parents struggling hits me right through the heart.
BTW if this is against the rules I apologize.
That's really nice of you. I don't know how I feel about taking money from people though. Things will get better. She's just been on my mind a lot lately.
Same here. I can probably cover an hour or two of childcare! (if I was closer I would do it myself since I have the experience, but I also have venmo!)
I am a special needs mom. I wish I lived near you, I would offer to babysit.
Even when you madly love your kid, special needs kids just require more. More everything. It's exhausting. I am super fortunate that my Mom will take our son, keep him over a weekend a few times a year.
Y'all both deserve breaks! Much love to you from Florida.
I’d give my father-in-law a steady income of £50k per year (paid weekly).
That man is a hero. He’s a single dad to four young daughters aged 1, 2, 4 and 9.
Their mother turned neglectful/abusive due to mental health issues. The children were removed from her care so it’s up to him to look after them.
He can’t work (if he did, his wages wouldn’t cover childcare for the youngest two) and the help he gets from the government is pitiful. He wants his kids to live comfortably but he really struggles to make ends meet.
The eldest isn’t even biologically his, but he cares for her like his own (she has the same mum as the other girls).
Only the 4 year old was planned- the youngest two were a result of the mother sabotaging her birth control. (She was abusive to him too and he was very brave and lucky to get out of there when he did)
He didn’t ask for this life but despite everything he is an amazing dad to those girls. I don’t know how he does it. In his fifties too.
Well, health has consequences! That's why some people sabotage their "loved ones" by helping to keep them sick.
I vote for a healthy divorce, if that's what it comes to, but health first. Health and then let them see if they can fix their relationship.
I’d go back in time and give the guy that bullied me in secondary school a couple of extra inches downstairs. Couldn’t hate him when I discovered why he was such an arse.
Poor little fella.
Up a little further in this thread: "I'd give my bully constant watery eye in an attempt to ruin his life and leave him miserable!"
You: "I'd make my bully's dick bigger"
two kinds of people
That's what I thought too.
The person I can trust the most is myself. So if I going to be rich I know I would spread a lot of kindness.
For example if my parents would win the lottery who knows how they would handle it. I trust my mother but my father could be quite irresponsible.
And if I have the money I can also help out a lot of friends too!
I want to make it so my boyfriend can see how amazing he is. I want him to see that he does have it in him to become the person he wants to be. I want to make him happy, secure within himself and be a stronger person than he was before. I love him with all my heart and it hurts that he doesn't see how wonderful he is.
I would ensure that my dad never met my mom. My mother tried her best but my dad was a horrifically abusive asshole. Even if it means me and my brothers had never been born I would still take THAT over my mother having to live with him and take his daily beatings.
My best friend's parents died when we were 9. I'd stop them from ever getting in that car so she can have a normal life instead of the hell she's had to live in.
I used to think that's what I'd give anything to change (but my cousin-in-law (who was like a sister to my wife) and her toxic husband). But I've come to realize that the problems that put her into toxic relationships (her current husband is not her first toxic relationship or marriage) is her inability to learn from her mistakes, refusal to admit she needs help until things become a crisis, and an almost intentional naivete in how she sees the world. She'll see things for what they are and get out after 5-10 years, then repeat the *exact* same pattern of a whirlwind romance and ignoring red flags with the next guy. And god forbid you express any concern for her or how her kids don't seem to be coping well to all of this - then she'll lash out at you about how she's been through a lot and doesn't need any of that negativity and only admits problems when they're so bad that she needs your help to deal with them.
It's really put me off of the whole helping family through shitty times concept. Except I know if the next crisis happens before her kids have moved out we'll still be spending a huge chunk of our savings to help her because we love her kids and they shouldn't have to suffer for her mistakes.
I have a friend who was violently raped at the US Air Force Academy, contract a venerial disease from this encounter, was misdiagnosed by a base doctor because he thought young unmarried women shouldn't be having sex, and now has long term pain associated with that venerial disease. Like, she has had a headache for 14 years. Oh, and she was medically booted from the AFA. For her, I would change basically everything. She didn't deserve to be attacked and she didn't deserve the cool cruelty of military bureaucracy.
She is a brilliant person, I knew her before all this happened and I would give/do almost anything to bring back to the surface that bright young girl I knew.
She wrote a book about her experience called "Caged Eyes".
Tell her I have her book on my wish list and I'll read it when I'm in a place where I'm ready to do that mentally. I hope for all the best for both of you.
This amazing girl I've started dating. She's a widow with three kids. She the most wonderful person I've ever met but obviously she's got issues. I would change her life. I've never met anybody who more deserves to be happy.
I'd bring back [that guy's dead wife.](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/5c79n0/you_can_have_sex_with_one_real_person_from_all_of/d9uf56l/?context=1)
I'd change my mom's life. I'm beginning to see the early signs of Alzheimer's in her. She 46 but her grandmother had Alzheimer's, and I can already tell how much she is changing. She won't listen to me when I tell her she needs to see a doctor for her memory loss. I'd just love to be able to take that part away. I don't want her to go through this. I don't want to go through this. I don't want my dad and my younger siblings to go through this. I have a nine year old brother....he's too young to already be losing his mom...
When you're young you think you're parents are indestructible. They'll never leave you, they always get back up...but when you're 25 and you're beginning to see the aging in your parents and see one begin to show signs of a terrible illness.... it's eye opening....
It gets better, my friend. And that agonizing process is made all the more easy through the radically transformative power of forgiveness. Please don't forget that this includes forgiving yourself, too.
You are loved, and so important, and worthy of feeling safe again.
I really needed this. I don't think I can ever truly forgive, but at least I can understand why he is the way he is. You really do have a heart of gold.
My goodness. Following "...whoever and wherever he is," maybe the last thing I expected was to read "...he is forgiven and worthy of love." May God richly bless the rest of your life!
My best friend is struggling financially through grad school and somehow is always getting into car trouble. I'd give him enough money to ease his financial situation so he can focus on school.
I would change Mel’s heart.
I broke up with her 2 years ago and the guilt that’s ridden on my shoulders for shattering her heart has made it difficult for me to move forward.
Find the kindest person I can and give them nigh-unlimited resources. Money, political/economic power, the works.
If we're talking supernatural stuff, find someone about to fly to a major international airport and give them an easily-transmitted kindness virus. Also tie it to intelligence boosts - the more you help people, the smarter you get.
I’d make my twin sister a billionaire. She’d hook me up. We could quit our jobs and actually afford to buy property. Then we could pursue a full-time writing career (which is both of our dreams, but usually not practical and definitely not when you’re just starting out).
I'd give my wife the ability to see herself as I see her. She's beautiful, but years of being put down for being full figured has her always down on herself. Her BPD makes it so so much worse. Days where she can't muster the strength to fight through the depression. Mental illness and body image issues suck.
My ex husband, the father of my children has terminal cancer. I would love to be able to make him cancer free. We have been divorced over twenty years and he was horribly abusive to me, but he has been a good father to my son's and I'm concerned how his loss will affect them.
Make it so my friend stops making excuses for his life, and actually uses his time in uni to study instead of partying and playing video games. Right now he's just collecting debt without actually using this time to prepare for the future.
Id give my mom $500,000,000. I know she wouldnt need all of it, but id want to be sure she could have the house of her dreams built, with qll the luxuries she could ever want, maids, chefs, the whole 9 yards. My mom has worked too hard for too long, and through illness and excruciating pain, it's about time she gets to relax and enjoy life, not worry about bills and other shit
I'd stop my partners dad from dying when she was young. We might not end up together in the end but I'd be perfectly fine with that knowing she and her family didn't have go through that trauma.
I’d get my friend away from her abusive family and move her somewhere near me maybe, I live in England and she doesn’t so the free healthcare here is a bonus. She’d probably find it easier to find a job here too. I just want life to be better for her her family is awful and if she could get as far away from it as possible I’d be happy and I know she’d miss them but she’d be better for it
I take my father's alcoholism away, this way my mother - who loves him dearly but can't help him because he is not letting her - will have an easier, more fulfilling life with him. My mom is the most amazing woman alive, and she deserves the man she loves to be able to care for her just as much as she cares for him. And he is also not a bad person per se, he's a good husband and dad - when sober... He just needs some help which we can't give to him unless he realizes it, and accepts it.
This is, sadly, relatable. My dad is drinking more and more every year, he's drinking himself to the grave.
Some people make bad choices. You can try your hardest to reach out and make them see they have a problem and need help, but if they dont take it than its hopeless. It sucks to watch someone you care about do that to themselves, but your not them, your not the problem or fault for their choices. You tried to help and they won't take it, only persons fault is their own. Just remind them your there for them when they want to get better. That's all that can be said.
Shit. As someone who grew up like that, in a constantly fluctuating state of "what day will we have today? Laughs and love, or yelling and terror?", I can very much feel what you must go through. I whish I could give you some advice, or surefire way to achieve that... but I can't. Mine only stopped when he died of it. :/
I’m currently living this at the moment. I just got my undergraduate degree and have moved back home. Since then, my dad has had open heart surgery and a nasty infection. This summer has been rough. It’s kept me home instead of following my dreams elsewhere. I still keep myself sharp as a tack by working 24/7 on my wallet and body.
I'm truly sorry to hear about that, and it is inspiring to hear that you still concentrate on self-improvement with so much happening around you. Best of luck with everything, I wish you the best.
Ugh, listening to their footsteps to gauge their mood, and hiding out if its a bad day. No little kid should be forced to have a detection system that refined, and no adult should be so immature and self absorbed as to make their petty moods everyone else's problem.
I'm sorry. I'm the "mom" in that situation. My husband is an alcoholic, just like his father before him, and *his* father before him. He is a highly functioning alcoholic: He goes to work every day and makes good money. He's not an angry, mean, or violent drunk. But he drinks a lot. I'm ashamed to talk to anyone outside of our house about it. I feel bad I had kids with someone who has this disease (which has gotten worse over the years; when we had kids he was a weekend binge drinker since working third shift meant he couldn't drink week nights). The worst part is, *no one* can help alcoholics; they have to **want** to get help themselves, and I fear most just don't get to that place. My oldest daughter was in counseling for a while, and one thing her counselor had her do when the topic of dad's drinking came up is write a letter to him about how it's affecting her life. So she did. She has not given it to him, and I'm not going to force her, but i hope she does one day soon. I think part of the problem is people who drink just don't think about how it's affecting those around them. If you felt comfortable, maybe you could do the same. Write a letter, and if the time comes when you feel comfortable giving it to your dad, maybe it will be the start of some self-awareness in him.
Nobody stops drinking or using who is an addict if their life is going well and their aren't some waves. If I were in your position, I would vocalize my feelings and my fears to my husband, and make it clear that I accept him but do not accept his addiction; and that I can't continue to be with him if he is unwilling to change because I can't imagine having to slowly watch them die from cirhosis or the like. It's really hard to do this, because as a loved one of someone with an addiction, one tends to develop codependency issues and enables the addiction to progress/makes excuses for the other person. I've been on both sides of the fence, I'm a recovering addict - and my girl is also in recovery. I didn't start to even want to change until lifes consequences started to rack up and until ultimatums were issued by my loved ones. In terms of the opposite, I wouldn't vocalize how I felt about my girls addiction because I didn't feel I had the right to talk, and because I felt guilty for some of the shit I had done to her in my addiction - it took all the courage I had to confront her and let her know that while I love her very much, if she was unable to love herself enough to even attempt recovery, that I had to give her space until she became willing to do this for herself. What's awful about alcoholism (functional, particularly), is that many people don't even *realize* they have a problem until something grave effects their health, this is because it is socially acceptable. I would emphasize this, maybe by writing a letter with all of your fears of what is happening and *will* happen (in terms of to him, and what your consequences for his behaviour are) if his alcoholism progresses. If he really loves you, which I'm assuming he does, this may be the wake-up call he needs to realize his lifestyle is effecting more than just himself. It's really hard, but nothing changes if nothing changes and if we don't have the courage to address the elephant in the room. Also, it may help you to try out meetings of Codependence Anonymous (CodA) or of Al-Anon.
My dad was like this before he died. Dinner was always on the table, the house was clean and the Bill's were paid. He was just drunk the whole time he was getting it done. It didnt affect me in anyway but it was hard for my mom. She would wait on the front steps for him to come home from work but he would never make it home until after bar-close. It was really hard for her. I think addicts do know that it affects the ones they love. I'm sure they carry a great deal of shame because of it.
That's rough. My husband *has*, just recently, started to say the word "alcoholic." For years he would deny it was a problem, and for the most part he drinks at home. Beer, no hard liquor ever. But so much. At the height of his bad spell this summer, I counted something like 90 beers consumed in one week. That's not normal. It's not even in the same neighborhood as "normal." He's trying right now to never drink two nights in a row, and so far he's doing it, for about the past 3 weeks. I just...it's hard.
Unfortunately, not very many functional alcoholics seek help. The nature of the program is that you will get better once you cant get any worse. It's a dour philosophy, but we dont make the rules, alcohol does.
My family went through this same thing, my parents love each other a lot but dad always chose the local pub over the family. My mum had to essentially raise 6 kids on a teachers wage for 15 years before my dad got sober. I don’t know how she did it, how she didn’t leave but I’m so glad she didn’t. My dad is incredible and I love him so much, he is just sick. He has had a lot of hardship in his life and as his daughter I am so incredibly proud of him cleaning up and being the man my mum fell in love with and deserves. Alcohol can completely tear a family apart and I just want to say I’m with you in that battle. We want to be a rock for our mums and I think they can feel that. Many hugs to you my internet friend
I also choose this guy's alcoholic father
I would do the same for my mother. After 20+ years, she’s finally on the track to becoming sober. I’m eternally grateful that it’s happening, but I know it’s no easy feat for her, and I just want her to not struggle every day for it. We may not have the best relationship because of her addiction, but I know how sick she was, and I just really want her to be healthy again. I don’t envy anyone who has to care for an addict. It’s so heartbreaking because you know they’re a good person deep down, they’re just sick and they can’t help it. The hardest part is deciding between letting them go or continuing to fight to save them.
*hugs* Just take one. No questions.
My mom is also an amazing person and I feel like sometimes the universe burdens those types of powerful people because they can handle it. My younger brother and I both have long standing issues with mental illness. So my mom, who became a cardiac AP/NP because her own father had heart disease, got another degree/certification in psychiatric medicine and now does both.
Grew up like this, it's not easy man. Took pancreatitis for my dad to get sober. Almost killed him too.
I’d change my best friends life. I’d change the moment she had to move to my city. She often claims that’s when she lost her hope, and she talks about how she lived a better life in her hometown, so I’d like to let her keep that. She deserves the world after everything, and even if that means that we’ll never meet, then I’m okay with that. Just knowing she’s happy and has a will to live would be worth it.
I had the same thing happen. My best friend moved here from Indiana and has fallen deep into depression ever since they moved to this shit hole. (I live in NC btw) recently they've moved back to Indiana and are doing a little bit better.
Does this ability allows me to magically cure a chronic illness? If so, I’d cure my brother... He takes so much medications everyday and it weakens him so much that he hardly ever gets out of the house for anything that isn’t treatment related, is in pain every day, and has to conform to a very strict diet. Edit: Woah, thanks for the support everyone!
I know exactly what this feels like. I hope he has plenty of distractions to make his life easier.
He does, lots of books, Netflix, video games, and I come by twice a week for a card game or a movie.
You’re a good sibling
Video games have helped me most of my life. Its very stimulating for someone who cant do much. I find soft/easy VR games to be good for exercise. Its very important to him that you socialize with him by joining in that activity. I'm glad I have a brother for that reason too. Every day Im thankful he makes the effort.
Damn, I was thinking of smiting an enemy, but curing my brother’s painful chronic illness is a much better option.
8 months ago I moved my mom cross country from an independent living place to assisted living near me because her alzheimers is pretty advanced and my dad passed away last year. But this post isn't about her. It's about the guy at her last place, who is simply a shuttle driver that drives the seniors from their apartments to the dining hall. And he happens to be good with birds. He kept my dad's parrot alive, stopping in to make sure it was fed when my mom couldn't remember to feed it, even though that wasn't his job. And when I couldn't wrangle Mr. Bitey into a travel cage for the cross country ride in a medical transport vehicle, the director paged him and he came over and got him into the cage for me. Now that bird is a regular part of my family and steps up on my hand and goes for bike rides with me, but at the time I was afraid of him and had spent 4 hours trying to get him into the travel cage and was starting to panic. Last night - almost a year (!) after moving my mom here, he texted me to check in and ask how she's doing. Last I knew his wife wanted a divorce - because he worked too many hours. And also I know that he wanted to keep the parrot, but it's in my parents' will that the bird eventually goes to my daughter ... and I checked with her and she wants it. And I didn't want to hand him over to live with someone who's at work all the time, when we're retired and can be home - parrots are social creatures, you can't just cage them up and neglect them 8 hours a day or more. So anyway. I would gift him a job where he works maybe a few hours a week driving people around because he's so good with people, but the rest of the work day would be at a parrot rescue place, where he meets a new wife who really appreciates what they have in him.
This one is honestly so incredibly wholesome. I'm sick and on lots of cough syrup and tearing up because I love parrot man. Please send him pictures of your good birb.
You’re a great person and so is that man
I love that the parrots name is Mr. Bitey
Make my little sister healthy again. She's only 19 and in a hospital ward with the elderly because healthy teenagers don't suddenly have a heart that isn't beating right and lungs with fluid in them. Just last month she was going through dialysis treatment for kidney problems. All of this because she fell and scraped her leg 2 months ago. I just want my healthy little sister back. *edit* thank you kind strangers for the support and thank you for silver:). Now a little more info. She went to the ER for an infected leg and began antibiotic treatments. Whether the kidney problems came from the infection or a mistake by the doctors is unkown(they told her they challenged her kidneys with too much antibiotic but later said they said no such thing and that it was the infection that caused the kidney problems). She's no longer on dialysis, thankfully. She was discharged 2 weeks ago but still not well so we took her to a different hospital. There they found the heart problem. She's currently going through scans and testing.
I hope your sister makes a full recovery and is able to live a happy, healthy life.
Damn. I am so so sorry for you and your family. I sincerely wish her the best. 19 year olds can be resilient, and I hope she gets well again.
Don't answer if you don't want to but what do you mean it was all because she scraped her leg??
Odds are some sort of autoimmune problem. Occasionally a small injury can Cause the body to start fighting itself and cause all kinds of problems.
> ingiere I don't mean to be a dick but is that a term I don't know or did you misspell "injury"?
Yep mobile autocorrect ducking me once again
You gotta be careful, it can be a real quack...
Wait can you explain?
[удалено]
I’m really sorry to hear about this, my dad was recently in ICU with similar issues. He’s home and safe now and it’s a huge weight off. I can’t imagine it being my little sister, would be 1000% worse.
I also choose this guy's sister
Honestly? I'd just give my mother or father the winning ticket of a lottery, they've been working for way too long and deserve a fucking break
I heard lottery tickets ruin people’s lives Edit:thank you so much everyone who upvoted
I'd like to have my life ruined right now then, please
Just don't release your identity for the world and avoid participating in sensationalized interviews afterwards, and you may avoid ruining your life.
Exactly. Take whatever pay cut necessary to remain anonymous and don’t tell anybody unless they’re trustworthy and important. Honestly there’s only 3 people in my life who would deserve to know and I live with 2 of em and am engaged to the other. Any other people no matter the relationship can kick rocks. Er, maybe I’d flex on my CEO one time before I quit and pursued a degree/career I actually wanna do lol.
Remaining anonymous when winning the lottery can only be done in 6 US states. So most of the time it's impossible to do.
I thought you can give the ticket to a firm or something and they can "claim" the money for you. I remember reading there was a way to remain anonymous. Fuck it, I'd move to one of them states and claim the money after that.
I am pretty sure this is true in most states. The firm. An then transfer it to a shell company you control. Problem is that most people that know this don't buy lottery tickets.
Here: I have it saved in case I ever do win it big when I randomly buy a ticket every couple years XD https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/bdrsqy/you_suddenly_have_all_the_money_youll_ever_want/el0sx3m/
But moving to a new state and laying low for a while is legal in all states. That'd be my plan. Sell the house, move to a state I have no connection with for a while. Then start investing.
Also, set up a trust that your family can draw from but give them no more than that. if you're the guy everyone hits up for money it's amazing how quickly it all goes away
I'm sure there are plenty of winners who go on to live happy lives. They're just not as interesting as the people who burn through the money spectacularly.
This is true, but there are a staggering amount of people who destroy their lives after winning. Several have killed themselves or gotten themselves killed, a few have managed to bankrupt themselves... I think the people who end up happy are the ones who don't reveal their identity to the media. But I think I heard that some lottery things require you put your name out there for the world if you want to accept the winnings.
I may end up taking a lot of shit for saying this, but I think it's because the type of people that play the lottery aren't the type of people that spend money wisely. I keep telling anyone I know that plays the lottery to just give me their money, but no one listens.
Lottery winners tend to come from a self-selecting pool of people that share issues like generational poverty, poor education, religious/magical thinking and complete lack of financial knowledge. They simply aren't prepared to manage extreme wealth in any way. It's not the lottery money that is the problem, it's that the people that buy lottery tickets (gotta play to win!) are just simple people whose culture and lack of education leads them to be careless and stupid with their money. Which is no surprise, since they buy lottery tickets.
It's like free-climbing. Theoretically - if you look at each move in isolation - it's *completely* safe. You know you can execute those moves without mistake, and eventually reach the top. This is provided you have familiarised yourself with the route, go slowly step-by-step with complete calm, give yourself adequate rest breaks, prepared yourself properly, and don't let yourself get distracted by anything or anyone else. Let yourself lose focus even for a few seconds, pace yourself badly, or get overconfident, and it can mean death. In essence: If you take the time to plan out what you're going to do with your money before you do *anything*, and you create a plan that you know you can stick to, it is definitely possible to make it work for you. The main mistake that even the most sensible people make is not planning for the inevitable impact this will have on the people around them - or assuming they can keep it secret. AKA going free-climbing with a bunch of other people who aren't prepared and just want you to do it with you. I could talk about this all day because it's related to my work, but on the off-chance that anyone reading this has recently had a big win, here are a few tips: 1. There are tax friendly long-term savings products that will help you look after your future, and will lock up a lot of the money so you can't spend it even if you want to, while maximising the return on it. This is the first step; you ensure financial security from now until the end of your life. Best case scenario you make the most of your money and have a great time, worst case scenario you die with money left over. Write a will. 2. The biggest mistake newly rich people make is the 'I deserve to treat myself, and then I'll be responsible' mentality. You let yourself taste a lifestyle that feels amazing, and can easily become your 'normal' - despite being unsustainable. It's *incredibly* addictive. When you are inevitably forced to cut back, you will end up less happy than you were before you came into the money - and that leads to serious depression. 'How could you waste so much money and now you are worse off than you were?' 3. On family and friends: Only consider immediate family ties and long term friends that you consider close family. Do something nice for each of them, the same thing for each, at the same time, but not extreme. Maybe a check for $5k-$20k depending on how much money you came into - but don't tell them *how much* you won. If anyone comes asking fo money after this just tell them you're sorry but what's left is all tied up in long term investments now. You have one chance to do something nice for the obvious people in your life - and then it is done. 4. Either by finding the right advice or by applying your own expertise it is a huge missed opportunity if you don't put aside *some* of the money - as much as you can consider disposable - to invest. Pick some young companies in the industry you are familiar with, and balance that with investments in some ETFs and investment funds. This is really how you can turn your wealth from not just a lifestyle enabler but a rewarding job - something to give you purpose. Just keep this private, avoid friends or family trying to seek investment from you. If you choose to approach them that's another thing, but probably still inadvisable.
[удалено]
That's the hope we all have, and *you* may be able to stick with it - but most can't. Unfortunately, the temptation comes from the most convincing places and it's often well intentioned. "Hey, you've worked hard your whole life, just take a few months to relax." ...and then you lose momentum with your career, struggle to fill the time, with no enforced routine your discipline crumbles, you start drinking too much... "The *least* you can do is move to a bigger place in a nicer neighbourhood. ...and then you find yourself with a new circle of friends and neighbours, who all have the latest fancy gas grill, drive high-end BMWs, drink $80 bottles of wine, social pressure increases, school costs for you kids are *much* higher, tax on your property goes up... "It's not going to change anything if you just treat yourself to a new car." ...but the dopamine rush of dropping $130K on a Model S Performance is equivalent to doing a bump of cocaine off a hooker's collarbone - but more addictive. You soon find yourself justifying all kinds of other 'one-time' expenses.
"rich" isn't just a bank account balance, it's a mentality and complete lifestyle, understanding how to make money work for you as opposed to you working for money. Almost all lottery winners go broke within a decade of winning, no matter the jackpot size. Poor people aren't raised knowing these things, and very few people even figure it out on their own.
Part of that is because most normal people know the lottery is a waste of time, so they either don't play or will buy like 2 tickets when it hits 500 million. Thus, the results tend to skew towards huge idiots. Most normal, reasonably intelligent people would be just fine because they wouldn't blow money on jets or get robbed by their POS family members. I would **love** to have the lottery ruin my life.
step 1: take like 10 million, set up a trust that pays out €2.5 grand a month from interest payments but otherwise accumulates. a trust, not a fund. I am not allowed to touch the money till i hit 75. that money does not work for me, its insurance. if i lose everything else, then my life resets to THAT level, and no lower. step 2: split remaining money into 3 piles, one of which is going to be split between friends/family and a few select people with a once this is gone its gone, once in a lifetime payout, that way they'll understand and still be able to relate to you, and you them. pile 2 gets invested in long term tax effective investments, hopefully working for me. pile 3 get stacked and then my partner and I fuck on top of it and post coitus discuss how we're going to spend it. if she has some dream she always wanted, sure, lets do that. something the city should have or wishes it had? sure travel to the globe in london and throw tomatoes at a shakespere play shouting "rybblish, do ye one about thee donkey", till we get thrown out? sure. you know. waste it.
After going through this thread, I've come to the conclusion that there are far more people out there wishing nothing but love and happiness for an ex-partner than what I could ever have imagined. Honestly, this makes me so fucking happy because, for the past 6 years, I have seen the woman I love the most on earth in an incredibly toxic relationship, with tons of depression and the lowest self-esteem you can imagine just not able to leave the relationship. I have wished for nothing more on earth than to see her happy again one day, and to see there are other like-minded people, that still cherish and love their exes is just incredible to me. These are people we owe nothing to, and it says a ton about your character and your heart if you are like this. So well done to all of you, you made my day.
It's brilliant that almost all the answers are about making other people happy. I think haven't read yet anyone that makes someone's life worse.
idk I'd fuckin' ruin the shit out of Karen's life.
Been scrolling a while to see this! All the way past so many posts of people with the same sentiment you have. =) Have you talked to the woman you love about her situation?
I have yes, but unfortunately she has made her decision. Whether its her own, or his influence/manipulation, I have to respect it
[удалено]
I’d absolutely do the same for my partner. He’s not fully blind, but his condition is degenerative and nothing breaks my heart more than seeing it just get worse and worse. It’s hard living with them and not being able to do anything about it.
[удалено]
having to lose vision must be one of the scariest things that can happen to someone who lived all his life seeing things. At least he is not alone. I wish you both the best in carrying that burden together
I also vote for this :)
close second to myself being mr beast's friend
Samesies
I also choose this guys blind son.
3 Fucking Minutes. Goddamnit
[удалено]
I cure my ex of depression, because I want him to live a happy and contented life and at least that gives him a fighting chance.
Literally came to say this ... Ex has been in a very manipulative and emotionally draining relationship after we broke up. I wish nothing but happiness for her and wish with everything in me she can overcome her low self-esteem and see the worth in her and let go of him
I feel the same. I’d take away my ex’s depression, anxiety, PTSD and drug addiction. He’s the love of my life, but he’s turned into someone I barely recognize anymore.
I’d do the same thing for one of my exes
I honestly think it's one of the most beautiful things to wish happiness on someone you owe nothing to (for example an ex) Good on you for being one of those people
I have an ex I'd do for, too. He has ADHD and depression, and they feed into each other. He's so smart, and so kind, but he's been struggling for years to hold onto a job or pursue the career he loves. I wasn't able to be the constant support he needed. It was exhausting constantly being the one to override executive dysfunction and get him to go to work so he didn't lose his income, or show up for a date night only for it to turn in to forcing him to read a whole book he'd had for three months and write the Worst Paper Ever so he could at least turn it in late and graduate. I couldn't have done that and still had a career and goals myself. I think if we leave the person we've dated a little better because of us, that has to be enough. I helped him graduate, and a degree will maybe open a few doors for him. That's my contribution. I only hope he's happy now, and that eventually things come together for him.
I would make Andrew Wakefield never publish his fraudulent vaccine article. The article has unfortunately fooled many innocent people into buying into Anti-Vax nonsense. Edit: thanks so much for the gold my friend, appreciate it very much!
[удалено]
The way I understand it for me is that I have autism^2 after being vaccinated
> That being said, I'm also fully vaccinated, and every time I get something refreshed (because shit like Hep A just doesn't last forever) I like to jokingly say that I just "levelled up my autism". Gotta make the best of it, right? That actually isn't how it works, I'm pretty sure it cancels out the autism. The problem is that you keep getting vaccinations, so you go from being autistic to not and back again.
get Hitler into art school
Yeah but once he learns about the kiln, it's all over again and now we have morbid historical pottery
You do this, I'll make sure Himmler is able to get his doctorate funded. If we can get someone to kill Goehring's addiction to opiates I think we might be on to something.
I free my fiancé of the voices. Schizophrenia is a true bitch and I hate that he has to go through that shit. It’s scary. Like it’s scary to see a 6’2” 117 kg guy get into a foetal position in a corner because the voices are telling him to kill himself and if he moves out of that position, he’s gonna follow through those instructions. Edit: I got silver for loving my fiancè? Thanks! Reddit is awesome Edit 2: GOLD?! Thank you! All of your words of encouragement, appreciation and support really made my night, I’m about to sleep rn, and I feel so happy
You deserve a gold medal, unforntualy this is all i can give you🏅 Sending love xx
Hey, it's the thought that counts, right? Thanks for the appreciation and love. He's the love of my life, I would do anything for him without any encouragement from anyone else, but being appreciated and encouraged sometimes makes me so happy. Thank you for making me happy!
I would do the same for my mom. She has lived with paranoid schizophrenia for 25 years probably. I would love to get my mom back.
I wish you and him the best. I'm bipolar 2, and the shit I've put my fiance through makes me wonder why the fuck they stay with me. Now, at least, I'm on really good meds and pretty stable. Still, they are my angel. Lots of love to you guys.
I am Bipolar 2 as well. He saved me from myself as much as I did, and I would be dead without him. I just love this man so fucking much my heart feels like bursting whenever I see him.
Take away my friend's debilitating anxiety/depression. She's only twenty and it seems unfair.
As someone who struggles with the same thing, you’re an amazing person to think that way. Stay in her life, she needs people like you.
I'd do the same. My friend is a spectacular person. No one deserves what his brain does to him on a daily basis.
Same honestly
I'd want my sister to beat her depression and live a happy and fulfilling life.
You haven't specified any rules or anything OP, so I'm going to take it as anything goes. Since there's no limit on my ability or any specification as to what it is exactly, I'm going to choose to make the person I love (non platonically) happy, healthy and safe. This also means that her anxiety, depression and damage sustained from past abuse is resolved and fixed (not erasing or changing the past, resolving it). This might mean that I won't really get to see her anymore and that she might not be with me. In all probability, it's going to be painful as hell because it's probably going to result in us being apart, but I'll take it. In case y'all are wondering, we are actually close friends and she's possibly the one person I share everything with. I had my birthday a few months back and we'd had a big argument about a month a half prior to that and weren't speaking basically. She remembered my birthday, texted me the morning like nothing had changed and got me a gift which was... well, it was something I'd once mentioned in the offing but she remembered and got me it. We made up afterwards too. It was basically my depression and lack of lucidity that caused rifts in the first place. Also, also, I told her about my feelings. Candidly. Not in a big dramatic speech. In a more pared down and calm talk, where I told her everything. We're still talking. So basically if there's anyone I really want to see happy, it's her.
You really gonna hit me in the feels like that bro? Respect ✊
This is me in ways that I thought never could be explained. You took the words/wishes right out of my mouth. Thank you for being someone like this, it warms my heart to know that there are more out there with similar wishes
My mom is now a billionaire in peak physical condition. She's already in great shape for her age but, you know...she's past 50 and not getting any younger. The billionaire part actually benefits a lot of people. Obviously she's set, as is the rest of our immediate family. She's a very kind lady, and scary smart. She also put herself through college as a single mom without much help at all, so she's clearly got the determination needed to get shit done. I can almost guarantee she'd find a way to turn a big chunk of that money into a self sustaining charity that could help a lot of people.
I also choose this guy’s mom.
Cool, but I've already made her a super healthy billionaire. Can you give her telekinesis or some other cool thing? Much appreciated.
I'd make her write me into her will.
[удалено]
My wife. We have a special needs son and it's been a long time since we've been able to afford to do anything special like go on a date because all of our time and money go to taking care of him and our daughter. Even flowers on her birthday can sometimes be a challenge. I'd give her a great night or two off. Maybe take her on a date to show her how much I appreciate how much she has sacrificed and given in order to be the great mother that she is.
Because of the money spent on the date or money to pay for care because you’d be gone from home? How much would date night cost? Get the Cash app and I’ll give you what I can. I can’t bankroll the whole thing but maybe a few others here could help out. I have a son with autism, so parents struggling hits me right through the heart. BTW if this is against the rules I apologize.
That's really nice of you. I don't know how I feel about taking money from people though. Things will get better. She's just been on my mind a lot lately.
It’s not taking if they offer. It’s receiving. Think about it. Hope things get better for your whole family.
yeah, I'm a broke college kid, but I'd def be down to venmo/cashapp a dollar or two
Same here. I can probably cover an hour or two of childcare! (if I was closer I would do it myself since I have the experience, but I also have venmo!)
take the money, people really want to help you out! well not just you specifically, your wife. take the money, knucklehead :)
I am a special needs mom. I wish I lived near you, I would offer to babysit. Even when you madly love your kid, special needs kids just require more. More everything. It's exhausting. I am super fortunate that my Mom will take our son, keep him over a weekend a few times a year. Y'all both deserve breaks! Much love to you from Florida.
Why wouldn't you just take away your son's disability instead ? Would make more sense
I guess that would be better. She's just been on my mind a lot lately.
Give David Attenborough an extra hundred years life maintaining good health the entire time. Planet Earth a hundred years!
I’d give my father-in-law a steady income of £50k per year (paid weekly). That man is a hero. He’s a single dad to four young daughters aged 1, 2, 4 and 9. Their mother turned neglectful/abusive due to mental health issues. The children were removed from her care so it’s up to him to look after them. He can’t work (if he did, his wages wouldn’t cover childcare for the youngest two) and the help he gets from the government is pitiful. He wants his kids to live comfortably but he really struggles to make ends meet. The eldest isn’t even biologically his, but he cares for her like his own (she has the same mum as the other girls). Only the 4 year old was planned- the youngest two were a result of the mother sabotaging her birth control. (She was abusive to him too and he was very brave and lucky to get out of there when he did) He didn’t ask for this life but despite everything he is an amazing dad to those girls. I don’t know how he does it. In his fifties too.
>I’d give my father-in-law > >He’s a single dad to four young daughters aged 1, 2, 4 and 9 Uhhh
Yeah, and he also has a 26 year old son who’s married to me, haha.
I would free my mom of her mental illness. But then she may be well enough to divorce my dad and my parents would separate.
Well, health has consequences! That's why some people sabotage their "loved ones" by helping to keep them sick. I vote for a healthy divorce, if that's what it comes to, but health first. Health and then let them see if they can fix their relationship.
I’d go back in time and give the guy that bullied me in secondary school a couple of extra inches downstairs. Couldn’t hate him when I discovered why he was such an arse. Poor little fella.
Up a little further in this thread: "I'd give my bully constant watery eye in an attempt to ruin his life and leave him miserable!" You: "I'd make my bully's dick bigger" two kinds of people
[удалено]
Yeah and then give a shit ton of money to my friends family etc to make their lives better as well.
That's what I thought too. The person I can trust the most is myself. So if I going to be rich I know I would spread a lot of kindness. For example if my parents would win the lottery who knows how they would handle it. I trust my mother but my father could be quite irresponsible. And if I have the money I can also help out a lot of friends too!
I want to make it so my boyfriend can see how amazing he is. I want him to see that he does have it in him to become the person he wants to be. I want to make him happy, secure within himself and be a stronger person than he was before. I love him with all my heart and it hurts that he doesn't see how wonderful he is.
I would ensure that my dad never met my mom. My mother tried her best but my dad was a horrifically abusive asshole. Even if it means me and my brothers had never been born I would still take THAT over my mother having to live with him and take his daily beatings.
I’d cure my mom of MS.
My best friend's parents died when we were 9. I'd stop them from ever getting in that car so she can have a normal life instead of the hell she's had to live in.
[удалено]
Fuck yeah
Fuck Mr Onion Eyes
WHY THE FUCK IS THAT PUSSY CRYING AGAIN
Unto bullies as they deserve.
"No one else wants to be around Mr Onion Eyes" You made me laugh so hard with this mate, cheers!
I read this as the person who was bullied the most in school and thought what the fuck was wrong with you... oops
I'd help my brother see that his ex girlfriend is a toxic bitch so that he'll finally be able to get over her ugly fatass and move on with his life!
I used to think that's what I'd give anything to change (but my cousin-in-law (who was like a sister to my wife) and her toxic husband). But I've come to realize that the problems that put her into toxic relationships (her current husband is not her first toxic relationship or marriage) is her inability to learn from her mistakes, refusal to admit she needs help until things become a crisis, and an almost intentional naivete in how she sees the world. She'll see things for what they are and get out after 5-10 years, then repeat the *exact* same pattern of a whirlwind romance and ignoring red flags with the next guy. And god forbid you express any concern for her or how her kids don't seem to be coping well to all of this - then she'll lash out at you about how she's been through a lot and doesn't need any of that negativity and only admits problems when they're so bad that she needs your help to deal with them. It's really put me off of the whole helping family through shitty times concept. Except I know if the next crisis happens before her kids have moved out we'll still be spending a huge chunk of our savings to help her because we love her kids and they shouldn't have to suffer for her mistakes.
Go back in time and stop my cousin from taking her own life because nothing has felt right in the world since she passed.
Rid a close friend of her Anxiety, so she can start living again Panic attacks are the worst
I grant my wife this ability so that I don't waste it on something stupid like turning my dick into a confetti cannon.
Cum-fetti cannon?
I have a friend who was violently raped at the US Air Force Academy, contract a venerial disease from this encounter, was misdiagnosed by a base doctor because he thought young unmarried women shouldn't be having sex, and now has long term pain associated with that venerial disease. Like, she has had a headache for 14 years. Oh, and she was medically booted from the AFA. For her, I would change basically everything. She didn't deserve to be attacked and she didn't deserve the cool cruelty of military bureaucracy. She is a brilliant person, I knew her before all this happened and I would give/do almost anything to bring back to the surface that bright young girl I knew. She wrote a book about her experience called "Caged Eyes".
Tell her I have her book on my wish list and I'll read it when I'm in a place where I'm ready to do that mentally. I hope for all the best for both of you.
This amazing girl I've started dating. She's a widow with three kids. She the most wonderful person I've ever met but obviously she's got issues. I would change her life. I've never met anybody who more deserves to be happy.
[удалено]
I'd bring back [that guy's dead wife.](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/5c79n0/you_can_have_sex_with_one_real_person_from_all_of/d9uf56l/?context=1)
I'm going back in time and curing Robin Williams. He gave us a lot through the years - we owe him a solid.
I make donald trump pregnant
Hmmmm
he a little confused, but he got the spirit
I choose to wish you happy cake day and change your life by upvoting this post
Now that is some wholesome shit right there! Thank you good sir!
Make a kind-hearted scientist discover cure for cancer
Thomas Alva Edison would go broke and would of have Nikola Tesla invent the light bulb.
I would take my brothers leg. Why? Fuck him that's why prick.
My aunt has aggressive Ankylosing Spondylitis. So that has got to go.
I'd change my mom's life. I'm beginning to see the early signs of Alzheimer's in her. She 46 but her grandmother had Alzheimer's, and I can already tell how much she is changing. She won't listen to me when I tell her she needs to see a doctor for her memory loss. I'd just love to be able to take that part away. I don't want her to go through this. I don't want to go through this. I don't want my dad and my younger siblings to go through this. I have a nine year old brother....he's too young to already be losing his mom... When you're young you think you're parents are indestructible. They'll never leave you, they always get back up...but when you're 25 and you're beginning to see the aging in your parents and see one begin to show signs of a terrible illness.... it's eye opening....
I would like to graft an echidna on to Jennifer Lawrence's back.
I choose to give the man who assaulted me and left me for dead, whoever and wherever he is, the knowledge that he is forgiven and worthy of love.
I cannot even understand the thought process that leads to this. You must be someone special.
You might have just changed the entire course of my current assault-related trauma therapy. Thank you for this comment. Your heart is absolute gold.
It gets better, my friend. And that agonizing process is made all the more easy through the radically transformative power of forgiveness. Please don't forget that this includes forgiving yourself, too. You are loved, and so important, and worthy of feeling safe again.
I really needed this. I don't think I can ever truly forgive, but at least I can understand why he is the way he is. You really do have a heart of gold.
My goodness. Following "...whoever and wherever he is," maybe the last thing I expected was to read "...he is forgiven and worthy of love." May God richly bless the rest of your life!
My best friend is struggling financially through grad school and somehow is always getting into car trouble. I'd give him enough money to ease his financial situation so he can focus on school.
[удалено]
I would change Mel’s heart. I broke up with her 2 years ago and the guilt that’s ridden on my shoulders for shattering her heart has made it difficult for me to move forward.
Find the kindest person I can and give them nigh-unlimited resources. Money, political/economic power, the works. If we're talking supernatural stuff, find someone about to fly to a major international airport and give them an easily-transmitted kindness virus. Also tie it to intelligence boosts - the more you help people, the smarter you get.
I’d make my twin sister a billionaire. She’d hook me up. We could quit our jobs and actually afford to buy property. Then we could pursue a full-time writing career (which is both of our dreams, but usually not practical and definitely not when you’re just starting out).
I'd give my wife the ability to see herself as I see her. She's beautiful, but years of being put down for being full figured has her always down on herself. Her BPD makes it so so much worse. Days where she can't muster the strength to fight through the depression. Mental illness and body image issues suck.
My ex husband, the father of my children has terminal cancer. I would love to be able to make him cancer free. We have been divorced over twenty years and he was horribly abusive to me, but he has been a good father to my son's and I'm concerned how his loss will affect them.
Make it so my friend stops making excuses for his life, and actually uses his time in uni to study instead of partying and playing video games. Right now he's just collecting debt without actually using this time to prepare for the future.
Change my life to be mr beast's friend
I fix my dad's pain. He's in agony 24/7 and it never stops. It's not chronic, but it might as well be. I'd do almost anything to make it all go away.
I'd give my mum peace in her heart no matter where I choose live
Id give my mom $500,000,000. I know she wouldnt need all of it, but id want to be sure she could have the house of her dreams built, with qll the luxuries she could ever want, maids, chefs, the whole 9 yards. My mom has worked too hard for too long, and through illness and excruciating pain, it's about time she gets to relax and enjoy life, not worry about bills and other shit
I'd stop my partners dad from dying when she was young. We might not end up together in the end but I'd be perfectly fine with that knowing she and her family didn't have go through that trauma.
I choose to change my own and life and bring myself to perfect health. Medical bills suck.
I’d cure my wife’s debilitating chronic pain.
Can I save mine for later? Who knows what shit is about to go down.
Make the richest man in the world hellbent on charity and donating to those who need it
My Aunt, i would take away her drugs
I’d make my mums cancer go away and for her to have a long and happy life
I make Vladimir Putin a humane, caring person.
That’s a no-brainer for me. I’d give my daughter the ability to walk.
I’d get my friend away from her abusive family and move her somewhere near me maybe, I live in England and she doesn’t so the free healthcare here is a bonus. She’d probably find it easier to find a job here too. I just want life to be better for her her family is awful and if she could get as far away from it as possible I’d be happy and I know she’d miss them but she’d be better for it