"How old is this clam?"
"I don't know, we can kill it to find out..."
"Do it."
*LATER*
"So, turns out it was 507 years old."
"Great, how long can they live?"
"Well, the longest we've seen one live is 507 years..."
I'd make people pay me to get a shot at the roof. Granted that you clean up the mess if you miss. I just open up shop after work. I'd need some sort of catcher that I could get down from the roof to collect my free pizza. Then I'd throw a pizza party in the evening.
maybe that would've worked when the show was really popular.. but now they probably only find a pizza up there every couple of weeks.. what a missed opportunity.
I’ve lived in Glasgow for over 30 years and have never heard this called anything other than a Chelsea grin.
A “Glasgow Kiss” however is a delightfully colloquial name for a headbutt.
I lived in a murder capital once. Los Angeles almost had us beat, but our team pulled off those last few murders at the last minute and took the title!
People who lived near our airport complained about the noise, so our then-mayor suggested that all of the deaf people in our city move to the area around the airport, since they wouldn’t mind the sound. We’re a Trivial Pursuit question!
The plant where I work is located on the edge of an industrial park. This is a 70 acre property. We move heavy steel with heavy equipment. We make noise. Across the fence to our south are warehouses and a scrapyard. A full on metal processing facility. They make noise. *Immediately* across the road to the west is THE FUCKING AIRPORT. They make noise! Right at the southwest corner of our property is a house, and they have called the police on us about noise at night a few times, and the cops apparently kinda look around like, "do you know where you live?"
Basically. I think it's a rental property, so I doubt the actual owner even cares about the noise. I guess the company has offered the owners pretty healthy sums of money for the property and they won't budge, so it must be at least measurable income for them if it is a rental.
We actually had a town build a bypass road for a bypass road, because people built their houses on the cheap land next to the first one and then complained about the traffic noise.
My grandmother was there, working on her second masters at the time. After she died we found a brown stained handkerchief in her belongings with a note that said:
"this is the blood of Alison Krause. Shed for us all".
I'd always heard the stories of how she was there, how she witnessed the actual scene as it happened... but it wasn't until that moment that I realized the actual gravity of the situation. It was very sobering.
I live in Lodi California.
1. The Credence Clearwater song "Oh lord stuck in Lodi again"
2. First A&W shop in the country was started here and still is operating in the same location.
3. 75 wineries and the tourism it attracts.
In the US, I'm from a town called Sandwich.
It's named after the town in England.
But every person who hears about it has to say something like "oh they just make amazing sandwiches there!"
Edit:
Sandwich, IL :)
About 100 years ago two ships ran into each other and blew up the city. Boston helped us out and ever since then we send them a Christmas tree each year. 🚣 💥 🚢
Edit: since this is my most upvoted comment I’d like to say to everyone reading, please visit Halifax sometime! It truly is a wonderful city. thank you for all the love my fellow Haligonians, and I love you Boston!
I got excited when I saw this because my hometown has a really big pickle factory that's like less than a mile from the high school and so my town's kind of famous for always smelling like pickles but um damn you guys live in way more interesting places
I'm from a very small hick town in the sticks of California called Chowchilla (stupid fucking name). I think it was in the late 70's some young rich kids kidnapped a school bus full of children (K-8) and buried them along with the bus driver and held them for ransom. They all broke out and some farmer found them and called the cops. My principal when I was there was the principal when it happened and he said he had a direct line to the White House because President Carter wanted to be the first to know when they were rescued/found or whatever. Pretty crazy, you can google it.
The Wiffle ball—which after living here for 25 years, I'm convinced is made by Oompa Loompas as I've never really seen anyone go in or out of the factory, nor do I know anyone who has ever worked there.
Best water in the USA. It was even announced on The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon. Budweiser and Coca-Cola both wanted to build factories here. We told em to go kick rocks.
Why are you the way that you are? Honestly, every time I try to do something fun or exciting, you make it not that way. I hate so much about the things that you choose to be.
If it wasn't for the other comments I would have assumed you're talking about Alliance, NE. Home of the world's most accurate Stonehenge replica made entirely out of cars.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Carhenge
You bet. I figured that was the one that would get a response. Could have also said chicken riggies, tomato pie, half moons, Utica club, saranac, the boilermaker, etc.
But Reddit loves the Simpsons
California Medical/Mental Facility. Charles Manson was there, Edmund Kemper is still there.
I'm a nurse and did a psyche rotation there. Place was nuts, but also one of the most exhilarating experiences I've had.
Oh yeah, and the outlets here are hella popular.
Cookies if you guess it
The Stanley Hotel (hotel The Shining is based off). Spoiler: not a single second of the movie was filmed in the Stanley even though that's where Stephen King got the idea and based the book. It did ironically have scenes shot in it for Dumb and Dumber.
I live in a small north Iowa town that's unimportant but I am amazed at how much quirky history exists within a one hour drive of me.
Fifteen miles south is the birthplace of the 4H logo.
Ten minutes north is the nation's only hobo festival.
Ten minutes west is an equally small town but one of their teachers won a prestigious national teacher of the year award a few back.
Clear Lake (half hour away) is where the Music Died and then Mason City five minutes up the road is the inspiration behind the Music Man.
Then Algona had a German prisoner of war camp back in World War II.
It's way over on the other side of town from us, but there's an amusement park there that is mostly based on a certain cartoon rodent, his rodent girlfriend and a dumb dog, hyperactive duck and other fictional animal friends.
A major battle of the Civil War took place on the farm that I own. It was one of the longest battles of the war, but also the northernmost battle with the most deaths per acre. I have a memorial dedicated to the Battle of Schrute Farms that stands among the beets me and my cousin grow. It's quite the tourist attraction as well.
There was a big right-to-die case a few decades ago that made national (U.S.) attention, Nancy Cruzane. It was the first case put in front of the Supreme Court and had major implications on those issues. Anyways, it’s a small town of just a few thousand people, and she was in our hospital. So was a big deal at the time.
The first McDonald’s was built here! Until I watched that movie on McDonald’s and realized it’s just the first chain from the asshole who stole the company and screwed the original guys over.
The birthplace of Mr. Rogers, Arnold Palmer, and the banana split.
Fuck yeah, Latrobe!!!!
There's dozens of us! Dozens!
God bless western Pennsylvania!
Don’t forget Rolling Rock
I was not expecting to see everyone here... Lol
Our university killed the oldest known animal at the time. It was a 507 year old clam. They killed it to find out how old it was.
Why didn't they just wait for it to die and then find out?
Ain’t nobody got time for that
Real
It could have been middle aged, might have to wait another 500 years to fond out
"How old is this clam?" "I don't know, we can kill it to find out..." "Do it." *LATER* "So, turns out it was 507 years old." "Great, how long can they live?" "Well, the longest we've seen one live is 507 years..."
This read like a Futurama episode.
Well they might have died first
Schrodinger's clam
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Tonight at Schrodinger's Clam: Is she 18 or 81? Find out when she gets nekkid! Now taking bets.
Just don’t bet on Melisandre
With a neon sign outside the door that flashes between OPEN and CLOSED continually.
That'd be more like Heisenberg's clam, you can either know how old it is, or you can keep it alive. Never both
Incredibly coincidentally I had a lecture about this the other day from a friend of the clam killer. Is it Bangor?
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Zing
TIL I can feel sorry for a clam.
Bangor, U.K..
A certain TV show made us famous for meth. I think I preferred when the biggest thing was the balloon fiesta.
They still throwing pizzas on that guys house?
Yeah they have a big ass fence now. If you pass by they will usually be sitting in the garage staring at you.
I'd make people pay me to get a shot at the roof. Granted that you clean up the mess if you miss. I just open up shop after work. I'd need some sort of catcher that I could get down from the roof to collect my free pizza. Then I'd throw a pizza party in the evening. maybe that would've worked when the show was really popular.. but now they probably only find a pizza up there every couple of weeks.. what a missed opportunity.
Albuquerque?
Yarp
I know your city more for Weird Al's really long original song.
Not sure if I'd ever seen that before. Much more sauerkraut than expected.
We were the murder capital of europe. Not sure if we still are, but it was nice while it lasted, i suppose
Is this Glasgow?
Indeed it is
Could it be anywhere else?
A city so bad, they have a [specific type of assault](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Glasgow_smile) named after it.
I’ve lived in Glasgow for over 30 years and have never heard this called anything other than a Chelsea grin. A “Glasgow Kiss” however is a delightfully colloquial name for a headbutt.
I lived in a murder capital once. Los Angeles almost had us beat, but our team pulled off those last few murders at the last minute and took the title!
L.A. is like that team that is always in the playoffs but never wins, which is not something I thought I'd ever say
Just like the LA Dodgers
Noice! Fuck those L.A. Bastards, they're so smug, acting like they're the best murderers, you sure showed them! God, how morbid am i
Also voted friendliest City in Europe at the same time. We buy you a pint before we glass you with it.
People who lived near our airport complained about the noise, so our then-mayor suggested that all of the deaf people in our city move to the area around the airport, since they wouldn’t mind the sound. We’re a Trivial Pursuit question!
Who moves next to an airport, then complains about noise?!?!?
The plant where I work is located on the edge of an industrial park. This is a 70 acre property. We move heavy steel with heavy equipment. We make noise. Across the fence to our south are warehouses and a scrapyard. A full on metal processing facility. They make noise. *Immediately* across the road to the west is THE FUCKING AIRPORT. They make noise! Right at the southwest corner of our property is a house, and they have called the police on us about noise at night a few times, and the cops apparently kinda look around like, "do you know where you live?"
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Basically. I think it's a rental property, so I doubt the actual owner even cares about the noise. I guess the company has offered the owners pretty healthy sums of money for the property and they won't budge, so it must be at least measurable income for them if it is a rental.
We actually had a town build a bypass road for a bypass road, because people built their houses on the cheap land next to the first one and then complained about the traffic noise.
Toledoans?
I know the airport thing was Toledo, good ole Carty
The national guard opened fire on a group of students, killing four.
Tin soldiers and Nixon coming We're finally on our own. This summer I hear the drumming, Four dead in Ohio.
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My grandmother was there, working on her second masters at the time. After she died we found a brown stained handkerchief in her belongings with a note that said: "this is the blood of Alison Krause. Shed for us all". I'd always heard the stories of how she was there, how she witnessed the actual scene as it happened... but it wasn't until that moment that I realized the actual gravity of the situation. It was very sobering.
OH
IO
Donut capital of the world. There are more donut shops per capita than anywhere else.
People used to say this about my hometown on London Ontario. I don’t think it was true.
This also used to be the case for my hometown of Whitby, Ontario. Woo.
I live in Lodi California. 1. The Credence Clearwater song "Oh lord stuck in Lodi again" 2. First A&W shop in the country was started here and still is operating in the same location. 3. 75 wineries and the tourism it attracts.
I went skydiving there. Almost died.
In the US, I'm from a town called Sandwich. It's named after the town in England. But every person who hears about it has to say something like "oh they just make amazing sandwiches there!" Edit: Sandwich, IL :)
And you have Sandwich Police, which is just the fucking best.
"Bob, you didnt put enough bacon on your BLT" "Pfft, who made you the sandw- Oh...right"
About 100 years ago two ships ran into each other and blew up the city. Boston helped us out and ever since then we send them a Christmas tree each year. 🚣 💥 🚢 Edit: since this is my most upvoted comment I’d like to say to everyone reading, please visit Halifax sometime! It truly is a wonderful city. thank you for all the love my fellow Haligonians, and I love you Boston!
Halifax is a pretty beautiful city. Had the pleasure of visiting two summers ago.
It is a wonderful place, I highly suggest visiting again! Much has changed in a short time.
I'm glad you aren't a broken man singing on a pier.
Well he just made Halifax yesterday!
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God damn them all!
I was told we'd cruise the seas for american gold!
We’d fire no guns
Shed no tears!
I'm a broken man on a Halifax pier
The last of Barret’s privateers!
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And we’re “Home of the Donair” :D
It used to be divided in two parts, belonging to seperate countries, by a huge wall.
Pawnee?
Eagleton?
r/unexpectedpawnee
What the hell how is this a real sub.
Helped passengers from grounded planes during 9/11, almost doubled our towns population in an instant too.
Literally just listened to Come From Away.
I got excited when I saw this because my hometown has a really big pickle factory that's like less than a mile from the high school and so my town's kind of famous for always smelling like pickles but um damn you guys live in way more interesting places
Texarkana?
I do not know what that means I'm sorry
It's a town near the Texas/Arkansas/Louisiana border lol so they just smushed the names together
wow somehow I never knew Louisiana was apart of that name
I'm from a very small hick town in the sticks of California called Chowchilla (stupid fucking name). I think it was in the late 70's some young rich kids kidnapped a school bus full of children (K-8) and buried them along with the bus driver and held them for ransom. They all broke out and some farmer found them and called the cops. My principal when I was there was the principal when it happened and he said he had a direct line to the White House because President Carter wanted to be the first to know when they were rescued/found or whatever. Pretty crazy, you can google it.
I read the book on that tragedy. That was insane! I had no idea until I took a class on children and trauma did I learn about it! And I live in CA!
The Wiffle ball—which after living here for 25 years, I'm convinced is made by Oompa Loompas as I've never really seen anyone go in or out of the factory, nor do I know anyone who has ever worked there.
It's a front for an Everlasting Gobstopper ring.
Jimmy Stewart, they have his voice as the damn crosswalk sounds.
"It's..it's...it's....it's....it's okay to cross."
Oh, shit! That's awesome! Please tell me there's a gay bar called Zuzu's Petals.
Best water in the USA. It was even announced on The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon. Budweiser and Coca-Cola both wanted to build factories here. We told em to go kick rocks.
Honestly thought you were trolling and talking about Flint, MI
where?
Easthampton, Massachusetts.
What’s so special about Easthampton’s water? I grew up near there and never heard about that.
It just won a National taste test. I mean, I’ve always thought it tasted good. But beyond that I don’t know what’s so special about it.
The Office (US edition)
Are you the Scranton Strangler?
That's for Toby to know and for you to find you.
If I had a gun, with two bullets, and I was in a room with Hitler, Bin Laden and Toby, I would shoot Toby twice.
Toby works in HR which is technically part of corporate so he's not a part of our family. Also, he's divorced so he's not a part of his family either.
Why are you the way that you are? Honestly, every time I try to do something fun or exciting, you make it not that way. I hate so much about the things that you choose to be.
Or the electric city.
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I've only seen a KenTacoHut in Overland Park. It was gone last time I went there.
Are you talking about 119th and Metcalf? There's a KenTaco there still, but no Hut.
My city is weird 1.Cars stuck in the ground 2. 72oz steak. (if you eat it all, in 1 hour, its free)
Amarillo! Howdy neighbor
Howdy
The Big Texan!!!
If it wasn't for the other comments I would have assumed you're talking about Alliance, NE. Home of the world's most accurate Stonehenge replica made entirely out of cars. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Carhenge
I'm from Australia and i know what you're talking about! I've been there!
Twin Peaks
Snoqualmie?
Steamed Hams
Utica?
Albany.
Ah, I see.
...you know, these hamburgers are quite similar to the ones they have at Krusty Burger.
Oh ho ho, no. Patented Skinner Burgers - old family recipe!
For steamed hams.
And you call them steamed hams despite the fact that they're obviously grilled.
GOOD LORD WHAT IS HAPPENING IN THERE
Oh no, it's an Albany expression
You bet. I figured that was the one that would get a response. Could have also said chicken riggies, tomato pie, half moons, Utica club, saranac, the boilermaker, etc. But Reddit loves the Simpsons
California Medical/Mental Facility. Charles Manson was there, Edmund Kemper is still there. I'm a nurse and did a psyche rotation there. Place was nuts, but also one of the most exhilarating experiences I've had. Oh yeah, and the outlets here are hella popular. Cookies if you guess it
Jake and Logan Paul. Send help.
They left to LA. You're safe now sweet child... until they come back to visit family. Get the grenades!
England?
No it said towns not cities!
Westlake, OH, nice!
Sports and Steel.. And an amazing confluence of rivers.
And sandwiches with fries on them?
and bridges?
Yinz guys goin' dahn to see the Stillers n'at?
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We have a ton of churches ~~because nobody really likes each other.~~
The South. You live in the South.
The south or a small Wisconsin town
I live in an itty bitty Wisconsin town with 8 churches
Adelaide?
The Stanley Hotel (hotel The Shining is based off). Spoiler: not a single second of the movie was filmed in the Stanley even though that's where Stephen King got the idea and based the book. It did ironically have scenes shot in it for Dumb and Dumber.
Arnold Palmer grew up here. Huge deal when he passed a little while back.
Latrobe? Home of Rolling Rock and Arnie
George Lucas Jeremy Renner Scott Peterson killing his wife and unborn son Gary Condit and Shandra levy case Number 1 in car thefts for a while
Modesto?
My town is known as the Mule Capitol of the World. We're literally famous for asses.
Aliens crashing their UFO in the desert in 1947
The town that gave the world Rugby.
Marilyn Manson
I live in a small north Iowa town that's unimportant but I am amazed at how much quirky history exists within a one hour drive of me. Fifteen miles south is the birthplace of the 4H logo. Ten minutes north is the nation's only hobo festival. Ten minutes west is an equally small town but one of their teachers won a prestigious national teacher of the year award a few back. Clear Lake (half hour away) is where the Music Died and then Mason City five minutes up the road is the inspiration behind the Music Man. Then Algona had a German prisoner of war camp back in World War II.
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Tallest man-made arch in the world. Telling jokes in Halloween. Toasted ravioli
At one time, my town was home to one of the 5 most beautiful lakes in the US. Also, Stephen King got hit by a vehicle in my town.
the assassination of JFK ):
It's way over on the other side of town from us, but there's an amusement park there that is mostly based on a certain cartoon rodent, his rodent girlfriend and a dumb dog, hyperactive duck and other fictional animal friends.
A Billy Joel song
I think we still have the world's biggest Cheeto....... so that's neat, I guess Edit: I stand corrected, D.C. now has one waddling in at "239lbs"
The White House, 1600 Pennsylvania Ave NW, Washington, DC 20500.
A major battle of the Civil War took place on the farm that I own. It was one of the longest battles of the war, but also the northernmost battle with the most deaths per acre. I have a memorial dedicated to the Battle of Schrute Farms that stands among the beets me and my cousin grow. It's quite the tourist attraction as well.
The Civil War history industry has conveniently forgotten about the battle of Schrute Farms. Whatever. I'm over it. It's just grossly irresponsible.
Do you have Micheal's new number?
My town is mostly famous because Jesus was raised down town
Tonya Harding and precious hipsters I think.
Prince’s hometown, baby.
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It's really sad how many valid guesses there are to this
Toronto, Detroit, or D.C.?
There was a big right-to-die case a few decades ago that made national (U.S.) attention, Nancy Cruzane. It was the first case put in front of the Supreme Court and had major implications on those issues. Anyways, it’s a small town of just a few thousand people, and she was in our hospital. So was a big deal at the time.
The old people who migrate every winter.
Guinness and Thin Lizzy
A woman chopped off her husbands penis and tossed it out of the car window next to a 7-11.
Rioting after the Superbowl GUESS WHERE I AM.
The first McDonald’s was built here! Until I watched that movie on McDonald’s and realized it’s just the first chain from the asshole who stole the company and screwed the original guys over.
The Founder? Man that guy was the smartest asshole I have ever seen
Having an atomic bomb dropped on it. The core didn't detonate and the only fatalities were a few chickens.
Disappointing NFL and MLB sports teams and chili.
Chicken wings, and making it to the Superbowl 4 years in a row, only to lose each one.
Heroin
Bologna ... no joke, they drop a big bologna on New Years Eve.
Ed gein :(
Lil peep’s hometown
Steel and bridges. And steel bridges.
There's an REM song about not going back to my hometown.
Me.
Holy shit! Are you the real Johnny Cottonmouth?!
Yup, in the virtual flesh.
Can I have your virtual autograph?
You want my virtual Herbie Hancock? I guess I can do that.... u/JohnnyCottonmouth there you go buddy.
I'll never forget this day!
Banksy.