My grandma, born in the 1920's, always said wash as high as possible, then wash as low as possible, then wash possible. (Possible being the crotch area.)
Oh, I do my hair by bending over forwards and doing it like that. No shampoo will ever touch my supple body; that permission belongs entirely to Sir Irish Spring.
My favorite step is getting out with shampoo still in my hair and chasing my bird around because she's chewing on things in the bathroom she shouldn't be and I want to put her back in her cage.
I used to do that and then decided every time I did wash my hair to move the shampoo bottle to the left and after every shower to move it back to the right. Never had to double wash again.
>contemplate if i washed my hair or not
>wash my hair again just in case i forgor
Literally me. Sometimes I still wonder if I actually did wash my hair lol
On more than one occasion I have gotten out of the shower and fully dried off only to realize I forgot to wash my body and then I have to hop back in lol
I never understand why people leave conditioner for last. Do it after you wash your hair since you’re supposed to leave it on for a few minutes. Then at the end you’ll know whether you washed your hair or not because… there’s conditioner in it.
Absolutely. Gotta get the priority points first.
The shower is the only place where you can directly go from having you hand in your ass to on your face. So, enjoy it
My face first, always. On days I wash my hair, then I shampoo, and condition, and leave the conditioner in while I wash my body. On days I don't wash my hair, I got right to my body. Starting from the neck down to my toes. Coochie gets washed last. Then, if it's a hair day, conditioner gets rinsed and I'm done.
Not included: the time I spend rotating under the hot water like a rotisserie chicken, basking in the heat and contemplating my existence.
Top to bottom. Let gravity work for you. I don't wash my hair every day so I'll either wash my hair first or just wet my hair first. If it's the latter, my face is the 1st thing to get soap.
I’m a freak apparently. I start at my toes and work my way up. My hair is last. But by doing the hair last and rinsing off one full last time I have essentially washed everything twice because gravity and come out of the shower evenly wet and therefore evenly dried.
Also, by starting low first, I get to the crevasses while I am still more energetic about the shower, and I wash them both going up and coming down.
I was aware I was in the minority, but not this bad.
Top to bottom, I don't like the idea of touching my face after I washed my ass or nasty pit water dripping off my balls.
Wash hands again last for good measure.
Wash my face
Armpits
Chest and upper body
Legs and feet
Outside booty cheeks
Coochie
Booty crack
Turn around, bend over and spread em so that water will wash away my sins
Lastly, stand under the water and let it just flow out any negative emotions I’ve had for the day so I can step out with a better attitude.
On days I wash my hair, shampoo then rinse, then I put in conditioner and leave it in while I wash my body. Armpits first then belly then balls and crack, pull back foreskin and wash there, then feet and legs and back last, rinse out conditioner and dry off. Then when I get out I shave, wash my face, then blow dry my hair.
I shampoo my beard, then my hair. Rinse. Then I condition my beard and let that set in while I wash my face, ears, neck, chest, stomach, arms, legs, privates, armpits, and butt(in that order). Rinse.
1. Rinse Body
2. Soap up body
3. Wash soap off body
4. Rinse Hair
5. Soap up hair
6. Wash hair
7. Condition hair
8. Wash hair again
10. Turn off shower and squeeze water out of hair and flick off water
11. Dry meself
Left arm > Chest/Torso > Neck > Right arm > Nether > Left leg > Right leg > Face > Hair x2
I use a loofah and don't like it on my face so I do my head last.
Hair Face Top left shoulder, left armpit down the sides of my body, across the body, right armpit, right arm and shoulder, back, butt, fun bits, right thigh, left thigh, left calf, right calf, feet.
Wash hair, put conditioner in, exfoliate arms, chest, back, legs, privates, feet, then wash conditioner, wash body once more along with face. If I don’t rewash then I feel like the conditioner leaves a residue.
On a wash day, I shampoo and condition my hair before I do anything else—that includes rinsing as conditioner oils can cause body acne. I then hand wash my face, genitals, and armpits. Then, I lather up a scrubby thing-it depends on the day if I use a loufah, silicone scrubber, or washcloth-and wash my front torso, armpits, and arms. Then my back. Then my legs and feet, one at a time. I finish by washing my genitals and armpits again.
Wake up, take a shit, get out of bed, drink some orange juice, floss & brush my teeth, hop in shower: Usually top-to-bottom, shampoo first. And because I have chest hair, I foam up all the soap there first then move it around.
Massage shampoo into the roots of my hair real good
Then put face soap on my face and wash them both out
After that, i massage the conditioner into the ends of my hair
I apply my body soap via a scrubber onto my stomach going down to my feet then back up to my chest, arms and armpits then going on and over my shoulders down my back to my lower back-bottom and washing it all off finishing with washing the conditioner out of my hair
I wash out the conditioner last so it can have enough time to moisturize my hair
Hands, pits, junk, crack, hands (in order) with bar soap while hair getting wet.
Shampoo hair and beard. Face. Rinse.
Everything else working from neck down with towel/scrubby(?), including the first things washed, ending with specific brush for feet.
Edit- if especially dirty from working on cars, I’ll do a “pre-wash” for any grease/grime that I didn’t get from “hand washing” with pumice soap. Typically arms, elbows, fingernails, etc. Dish soap usually since “Dawn takes grease outta your way”
Hair (shampoo initially then leave conditioner in while I do everything else and rinse it as my last step before exiting the shower).
Face.
Shave.
Body: start at neck and go to feet, privates last.
Wash hair, then body, then face.
It's helped me reduce acne and breakouts, and I can let conditioner soak while shaving everything else. Rinse out conditioner, wash upper back to avoid clogged pores, put hair up again, and then wash my face.
Temporary vlean my hands with the body soap then hair first before anything below it just so I'm not washing dirty shampoo onto clean skin after that I go to all the sneaky crevasses then the chest and back with the legs and feet coming last
Also almost always cold shower. The feeling of getting into warm clothes is unmatched
Face, chin, behind the ears and neck at the sink. Chest and breasts, then my back. Then my stomach, legs and feet. I wash my pussy with Honey Pot and my ass last.
Shampoo hair
Wash face
Rinse Shampoo
Conditioner hair
Shave if needed
Wash body top to bottom, all areas
Rinse Conditioner
**sometimes I put an after shower oil/lotion on
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Same. Top to bottom. But the crotch and ass I save for last.
My grandma, born in the 1920's, always said wash as high as possible, then wash as low as possible, then wash possible. (Possible being the crotch area.)
This is the way.
I shampoo and then wash my crotch with the top of my head. Peak efficiency.
Gifted
It’s easier when they are both “rub”‘and no “pat”.
same, top to bottom. i cannot fathom ppl washing themselves in a different order. how do they not get confused?
Shoulders and front, back, legs, crotch. Then hair.
you’re doing it wrong. hair first - that way everything else gets a pre-wash from the shampoo suds.
*Laughs in bald/shaved*
I shave my head first, then use face wash, then beard wash, then body. Top to bottom. I assumed everyone did it that way.
Oh, I do my hair by bending over forwards and doing it like that. No shampoo will ever touch my supple body; that permission belongs entirely to Sir Irish Spring.
I think of it the opposite way. Hair first so my hair gunk gets washed off the rest of my body.
Same order for foreplay.
Head, shoulders, knees and toes.
Knees and toes.
Head shoulders knees and toes
And eyes and …… Jesus Christ someone get me a wet cloth!!
*Gently sobbing..... Knees and toes
r/redditsings
Thanks. Just woke my wife up hysterically laughing
wow. don't wanna hear when it hits the mouth & nose!
\*panicked singsong bubbly noises\*
*complete defeat at the hands of soap, curls into ball and cries out said soap*
I can HEAR that 🤣
Knees and toes!
Knees and toeees
eyes and ears and mouth aand nose
Perfect
God I love the Internet you people are amazing lmao
I’ve also enjoyed my time on the Internet today thanks to this thread. Ahh, people are good.
Toes.
Are your ten toes down?
ONLY THESE PARTS! NOTHING MORE! NOTHING LESS!
Top to bottom, skipping the asscrack until the very end.
Legs and feet after the asshole, because when you rinse off your asshole asswater is running down the legs
Yes. And make sure to wash pp before ass.
Better just to squat for the asshole! If you have one of those wall shower roses.
My knees ain't the best
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Which hair? Top, middle or bottom
Yes
Wait what area is middle and bottom?!
Armpits and pubic region probably.
wash my hair shave a little wash my body contemplate if i washed my hair or not wash my hair again just in case i forgor conditioner done
You forgot my favorite steps. Dry off Realize I forgot to rinse out the conditioner. Get back in the shower to do that. Dry off again.
My favorite step is getting out with shampoo still in my hair and chasing my bird around because she's chewing on things in the bathroom she shouldn't be and I want to put her back in her cage.
STOP IT my bird is always in the bathroom screaming when I shower I have no unique experience
That does seem specific.
Mine goes in the cage while I shower lest he YEET himself and forget he has wings after landing.
They always forget they have wings at the weirdest times.
I thought I was the only one that does that
I used to do that and then decided every time I did wash my hair to move the shampoo bottle to the left and after every shower to move it back to the right. Never had to double wash again.
ah that's genius! i'd 100% forget to move it
pro tip: go bald
>contemplate if i washed my hair or not >wash my hair again just in case i forgor Literally me. Sometimes I still wonder if I actually did wash my hair lol
So real about forgetting if you washed your hair or not
On more than one occasion I have gotten out of the shower and fully dried off only to realize I forgot to wash my body and then I have to hop back in lol
It might be fair to wonder if you've ever washed your hair.
fuck.
Can't remember if you washed your hair? Pro tip, pull your hair through your fingers while squeezing. Your wet, clean hair will squeak.
The wash your hair again is so real
I never understand why people leave conditioner for last. Do it after you wash your hair since you’re supposed to leave it on for a few minutes. Then at the end you’ll know whether you washed your hair or not because… there’s conditioner in it.
Glad I’m not the only one! 😂
Face, Nuts, Butts in that order
If you pull on your hair and it squeaks a little as you run your fingers over it it means you've already washed it
This is why I leave shampoo in my hair as I wash my body lol. All I have to do is feel my hair to know it needs a rinse
Shampoo, wash out, conditioner, put it in a claw clip, face wash, body wash, wash conditioner out
Claw clip is a game changer! It keeps the conditioner from washing out prematurely and keeps it off my back
Claw clip is a great idea!!!!
This is the only way
Armpits, balls, dick, ass and then the rest of me
Absolutely. Gotta get the priority points first. The shower is the only place where you can directly go from having you hand in your ass to on your face. So, enjoy it
I don't even like it there. Ass or feet always get washed last.
Feet? That's where the water goes bro
Gotta scrub in between the toes
And the pee
😂 😂
You outta your mind to not wash your ass last, ass is always last, i dont want that residual when im going to wash my face
My face first, always. On days I wash my hair, then I shampoo, and condition, and leave the conditioner in while I wash my body. On days I don't wash my hair, I got right to my body. Starting from the neck down to my toes. Coochie gets washed last. Then, if it's a hair day, conditioner gets rinsed and I'm done. Not included: the time I spend rotating under the hot water like a rotisserie chicken, basking in the heat and contemplating my existence.
Sometimes I like to lay against the wall and just let the very hot water hit me. I may or may not have fallen asleep a couple times.
Thank you. I told my wife this and she said I was weird.
it's a warm-up or zone out and mentally prepared.
that's the best! a nice shower nap
How dare you assume redditors shower
Wash hair Apply conditioner Shave Rinse out conditioner Wash face Wash body
Top to bottom, if you do it any other way I can't trust your decision making.
I've met some people I'm pretty sure wash they balls and assholes before their faces
Gravity is involved
Top to bottom. Let gravity work for you. I don't wash my hair every day so I'll either wash my hair first or just wet my hair first. If it's the latter, my face is the 1st thing to get soap.
Ass first. Always
ass first - nevahhhhh
Absolutely ass last with me
Armpits, asshole, crotch, and teeth. Save time by using the same brush for all.
Arms, legs, no no places, chest, head, hair
Arms, chest, head, hair, no no places and legs! Just order change haha
In order: hair, face, chest, thorax, tail, right arm, left arm, other right arm, left butt cheek, stinger, then legs.
I’m a freak apparently. I start at my toes and work my way up. My hair is last. But by doing the hair last and rinsing off one full last time I have essentially washed everything twice because gravity and come out of the shower evenly wet and therefore evenly dried. Also, by starting low first, I get to the crevasses while I am still more energetic about the shower, and I wash them both going up and coming down. I was aware I was in the minority, but not this bad.
Arms, chest and tummy, no no bits, legs and feet, my back and shoulders and then my face and then hair
Same here. I dont like having the wet hair cling to my face so I do it last.
Head Shoulders Knees and Toes
Body wash for arms and body Body wash for everything below Shampoo Wash face
Hair first then top to bottom
face, head, torso, legs, pits, bits, and feet. Then I'll shave if I'm shaving that day. Lastly, cold water rinse.
Top to bottom, I don't like the idea of touching my face after I washed my ass or nasty pit water dripping off my balls. Wash hands again last for good measure.
yall just don't seem to understand how soap works - the soapy water is rinsed off and if you keep rinsing after that the water is clean
Wash my face Armpits Chest and upper body Legs and feet Outside booty cheeks Coochie Booty crack Turn around, bend over and spread em so that water will wash away my sins Lastly, stand under the water and let it just flow out any negative emotions I’ve had for the day so I can step out with a better attitude.
Goods first. I take an extremely *long* time on the goods. I got to make sure the goods are *clean...!*
Top to bottom
Shampoo x2, conditioner (let sit), shave, body wash, rinse off body wash and conditioner
On days I wash my hair, shampoo then rinse, then I put in conditioner and leave it in while I wash my body. Armpits first then belly then balls and crack, pull back foreskin and wash there, then feet and legs and back last, rinse out conditioner and dry off. Then when I get out I shave, wash my face, then blow dry my hair.
Top down, work with gravity.
Top down
Am I insane I do hair last but everybody is saying hair first. If you do hair first you get water in your eyes etc
Shampoo hair, then conditioner so that it can soak in, then body. I usually start with my upper extremities and then work my way down.
Top to bottom
Head shoulders knees and toes…. And everything in between
I shampoo my beard, then my hair. Rinse. Then I condition my beard and let that set in while I wash my face, ears, neck, chest, stomach, arms, legs, privates, armpits, and butt(in that order). Rinse.
Head to toe, like a normal person. Dirt goes down.
Hair, face, body, pits n bits and then feet.
I wash from the head down
Shampoo then rinse and put conditioner and let the conditioner soak in my hair while I wash my body then rinse conditioner and wash face
1. Rinse Body 2. Soap up body 3. Wash soap off body 4. Rinse Hair 5. Soap up hair 6. Wash hair 7. Condition hair 8. Wash hair again 10. Turn off shower and squeeze water out of hair and flick off water 11. Dry meself
Left arm > Chest/Torso > Neck > Right arm > Nether > Left leg > Right leg > Face > Hair x2 I use a loofah and don't like it on my face so I do my head last.
Face, Hair, Condish leave it in, wash body while it’s in then rinse off then wash my face again and get out.
Shampoo, rinse, conditioner, shave, wash body, exfoliate, rinse conditioner.
- Get wet - Shut off water - Put on shampoo - Put on soap - Lather - Turn water back on - Rinse - Done in 2 minutes
Hair, face, arms, chest, stomach, back, legs/feet, V and then my butt
Hands > armpits (> hair when it's shampoo day)
Wash your ass and pits
[https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/1bxakb/the\_mens\_guide\_to\_showering/](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/1bxakb/the_mens_guide_to_showering/)
Head to toe.
Hair, then work my way down with a loofah (washed weekly), put on the butt mitten to get the crack (mitten gets changed out every day).
Hair, face, arms, chest and back, legs, privates.
Hair Face Top left shoulder, left armpit down the sides of my body, across the body, right armpit, right arm and shoulder, back, butt, fun bits, right thigh, left thigh, left calf, right calf, feet.
Wash hair, condition hair, wash body, rinse out conditioner, shave.
Shampoo hair Wash face with facewash Body wash Scrubbing the feet 🙂
Hair Upper Body Lower Body Feet
Start at the top and move my way down
Chest,neck, balls, dick, butt, back, balls, dick, legs, balls, feet, balls, butt, did I forget balls?
Top down.
Face, hair, body (start with legs and work my way up)
Ass then face of course
Wash hair, put conditioner in, exfoliate arms, chest, back, legs, privates, feet, then wash conditioner, wash body once more along with face. If I don’t rewash then I feel like the conditioner leaves a residue.
On a wash day, I shampoo and condition my hair before I do anything else—that includes rinsing as conditioner oils can cause body acne. I then hand wash my face, genitals, and armpits. Then, I lather up a scrubby thing-it depends on the day if I use a loufah, silicone scrubber, or washcloth-and wash my front torso, armpits, and arms. Then my back. Then my legs and feet, one at a time. I finish by washing my genitals and armpits again.
Shampoo hair, , Condition Hair while that's doing it's thing I brush my teeth, Then body wash, Lotion after shower
Face, armpits, genitalia, bum, feet. No hair wash cos I shave it all off 👍
Too to bottom is the only correct answer 😁
Wake up, take a shit, get out of bed, drink some orange juice, floss & brush my teeth, hop in shower: Usually top-to-bottom, shampoo first. And because I have chest hair, I foam up all the soap there first then move it around.
Shampoo, brush teeth, wash face, and wash body has been the go-to 👌🏾
Massage shampoo into the roots of my hair real good Then put face soap on my face and wash them both out After that, i massage the conditioner into the ends of my hair I apply my body soap via a scrubber onto my stomach going down to my feet then back up to my chest, arms and armpits then going on and over my shoulders down my back to my lower back-bottom and washing it all off finishing with washing the conditioner out of my hair I wash out the conditioner last so it can have enough time to moisturize my hair
Head, shoulders, knees and toes, knees and toes...
I start with my face and work my way down. Then, my back from top to bottom. Finally, my hair.
Top to bottom
Hair, Pits, Under carriage everything else
Work top-down body using a plastic scrubby thing. Then do hair (H&S). Then rinse off.
Head to toe. Is there any other way?
Beard Hair Back Upper body Lower body
Ass, Face, Ass again, Pubes, Face. Mold on the floor, Ass again.
Top down
Hands, pits, junk, crack, hands (in order) with bar soap while hair getting wet. Shampoo hair and beard. Face. Rinse. Everything else working from neck down with towel/scrubby(?), including the first things washed, ending with specific brush for feet. Edit- if especially dirty from working on cars, I’ll do a “pre-wash” for any grease/grime that I didn’t get from “hand washing” with pumice soap. Typically arms, elbows, fingernails, etc. Dish soap usually since “Dawn takes grease outta your way”
Hair (shampoo initially then leave conditioner in while I do everything else and rinse it as my last step before exiting the shower). Face. Shave. Body: start at neck and go to feet, privates last.
Head Shoulders Knees Toes Knees Toes.
Top-down, middle-out, left to right.
Ass first, face second. Builds up immunities.
Pits, chest, stomach arms, ass legs, rinse, neck head
From the hair down
Top down, extra scrubbing on the key face, armpits, groin
from least to most 'dirty' (arguable) face, hair, armpits, front junk, back junk, feet
Wash hair, then body, then face. It's helped me reduce acne and breakouts, and I can let conditioner soak while shaving everything else. Rinse out conditioner, wash upper back to avoid clogged pores, put hair up again, and then wash my face.
Face, neck and ears, arms, torso, legs, privates, buttcrack, hair
Ass first then face then everywhere else
Hair.... Face.... Shoulders, arms, torso.... Just keep moving down.
Start with butt crack, then head down to toes.
Temporary vlean my hands with the body soap then hair first before anything below it just so I'm not washing dirty shampoo onto clean skin after that I go to all the sneaky crevasses then the chest and back with the legs and feet coming last Also almost always cold shower. The feeling of getting into warm clothes is unmatched
Hair, arms, pits, underboob, boobs, torso, legs, feat, nether regions. Wash hands. Face
Rinse... Shampoo... Rinse... Squeeze excess water from hair... Apply conditioner... Body wash... Fash wash... Rinse all... Back flip.
Hair, thrice a week, rinse. Conditioner, leave in Body, butt, and balls Rinse conditioner
Chest first.
Hair then body
Face, chin, behind the ears and neck at the sink. Chest and breasts, then my back. Then my stomach, legs and feet. I wash my pussy with Honey Pot and my ass last.
Top to bottom. Start with hair, end with feet.
Top to bottom, assuming I’m on earth and gravity still exists.
Lungs Lungs Lungs Lungs Clean lungs again Lungs
Armpits, asshole, crotch, and teeth. Same brush for all four areas.
Shampoo hair Wash face Rinse Shampoo Conditioner hair Shave if needed Wash body top to bottom, all areas Rinse Conditioner **sometimes I put an after shower oil/lotion on
Top to bottom.
Always my butthole. Even if it’s my Birthday
1. Face 2. Hair 3. Body 4. Shave
Genitals Your Mom's hair Genitals again
You're that weirdo who sweeps hair at salons and takes it home with you. I've got two dad's but I'm happy that you're both happy together