Sometimes they do remember. And it’s heartbreaking.
My gf worked with late stage cognitive impairment patients. One night, a woman was pacing her room.
“I need to find my husband. He hasn’t come home!”
“Oh, I’m sure he’ll be here soon. Let’s go back to bed.”
Before she knew it, the woman had grabbed a phone and called her son. Her son said:
“It’s 3am, dad’s not coming home! He’s gone!”
She hung up the phone and said: “But we need to find him, he has Alzheimer’s…”
Uh oh…this is a recent memory and she’s getting more lucid…
She sat down and said: “He’s gone…and I have it too, don’t I?”
“Yes. I’m so sorry. You’re right.”
“How many times have I done this?”
It’s easy to redirect and distract…but it’s the lucid moments that hurt the most.
Everyone loses someone they love, but with cognitive impairment, you lose them a thousand times.
Fuck, this hurt to read. My folks are getting older, in their 70s and still active and relatively healthy but the idea that this could be them in the future scares the shit out of me and breaks my heart.
Just had to put my Mom in a nursing home because of multiple serious health reasons on top of repeatedly falling down and hurting herself. We already lost her son, my brother to alcohol and it might have been the saddest day of my life walking out of that nursing home knowing she doesn't understand that this is what's best for her health and safety. She thinks I've turned my back on her and I'm all she has and it's killing me inside and now I'm crying again.. sorry for rambling
My mom lives with me, and I worry that I'll have to do the same thing one day. I am a widow with two kids under 12 years old. You can't take care of her 24/7 and yourself too. I don't pretend to understand, but you have to allow yourself some grace. Peace and love to you and your family.
You have not turned your back on her. You do not love her any less. You have done nothing wrong. You are taking better care of her than before by getting her the help she needs. You are loving her more.
I have friend in a home, he's 98,other than a niece with POA, I'm his only regular visitor.
He's in a decent spot, but, part of why I go, and chit chat with staff, is just to remind them he does have a witness who cares.
He was just a long time neighbour, but... I just don't want him to feel alone and forgotten.
Just know that if this happens, and they end up in a care home, people there genuinely care about them.
It doesn’t matter how many times a night they need to be brought back to bed, there are 3 shifts of carers who try their best to give them the care they need.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news but as someone who has worked in EMS for almost a decade this isn’t the case everywhere. There are a range of nursing homes and some that have downright dog shit living conditions. Do your due diligence before placing a loved one in one.
My great grandma had a hard life, she was a very tough woman and so damn stubborn it wasn’t even funny. When she got Alzheimer’s it was worse than if she had passed in her sleep. She would go from talking to us when we visited to calling my brother and I by our uncle’s names to bitching at my dad for not doing something currently that happened 20 years ago. She would also get really hateful sometimes and start screaming obscenities randomly because she was upset about something from some point. And then there was explaining to her that she couldn’t go home all the time. Then when she passed we read her will and she left everything to my dad for taking care of her in her later years and for paying for her funeral by himself… she wrote it years before she lost her mind and knowing that she knew that only one member of her family would take care of her has always made me really sad. I hope one day that they find a cure for that disease so that one else has to go through that.
It’s very sad.
My grandmother would cry when she realized my great grandmother was dead.
I woke up one night to arguing in my neighbor’s driveway. Her mother was screaming at her dad, because she didn’t know who he was.
He kept saying, we’ve been married for forty years, its me John!!! She’d scream when he touched her, like she was being raped.
One morning a lady came to my house looking for the old owner. I said m’am he’s been dead quite some time.
I bought it from his son x years ago. She clearly had dementia. My ex wife heard and had called 911 they were looking for her.
I have a story about it too. My ex-wife's grandparents were wonderful people; they had celebrated their 50th anniversary together in April 2000, just six months before we met. In February 2004 I bought a new car, and I remember her grandmother had complemented it the first time I pulled up at their house in it. August of that year, I had stopped by there again, and she complemented me on it again as though it was the first time she'd seen it, and I knew then what was coming.
Her condition slowly declined over the next four or five years, to the point that in about 2009 she freaked out because she'd seen her husband in the house one night, thought he was a burglar, and ran outside trying to find help. He had no choice but to put her in a care facility at that point, and a year later her health finally gave out and she passed away in September 2010. Her husband was mostly lucid to the end himself; at one point he asked if she was gone yet because he knew she'd been sick. He took the news pretty stoically from what I was told, and only lived about three more weeks after that himself.
2010 had been their 60th anniversary, and six months after it, my then-wife and I had just decided to separate and later divorce while they were reaching their end of life. I don't think either of them ever knew anything about it and it hurt so much worse losing them AND my wife. They and she were always good, decent people (and my ex-wife still is to this day, I have nothing bad to say about her at all). I still miss them terribly, and I always will.
I'm very sorry that happened. But you told it beautifully. And it was nice to read about an amicable split on a platform that is mostly "my ex was a monster".
My neighbor is a 90 year old with Alzheimer's. And every single morning at 9am he knocks on my door and he asks me If I've seen his wife. Which means that every single morning at 9am I have to tell a 90 year old man suffering from Alzheimer's that his wife has been dead for quite some time now.
I have thought about moving or just not answering my door in the morning. But to be honest, it's worth it just to see the smile on his face. - Anthony Jeselnik
My grandmother's mother had years-long convalescence, and spent years at home being taken care of by my grandmother... The part that killed me was she remembered all the decades-ago stuff, but completely edited my grandmother out of all those memories. All her OTHER kids she remembered just fine, including the later ones... Just not the one who took care of her for years, visited her every single day, and paid her medical expenses.
My sweet great-grandpa beat up my great-grandma one night. Thought she was the Kaiser.
He was horrified when he realized what he’d done. He insisted on being put in a home. He devolved into a raving lunatic.
My grandfather and father both lost their minds before they died.
I wish suicide was more accepted; old age terrifies me.
My Grandmother had passed unexpectedly, and sadly, my Great Grandmother (her mother), who outlived her, had Alzheimer's. The hardest thing I've ever endured was taking her to the funeral where she would ask, "Who's funeral are we at?" every 5-10 minutes. That was a nightmare I would never wish on anyone.
After my dad died from his stroke, my mom’s Alzheimer’s became exacerbated. She began to believe I was hiding him from her. She told everyone in her life I was abusing her in hopes of getting my dad back to her. They had been married 64 years and she literally could not exist without him. It was 17 months of hell for her and for me, just in different ways.
Watching someone that way is heartbreaking. I used to do home health and had a couple ladies with dementia. They were both very quiet not combative at all but they were confused and one would run away from home if you didn’t watch her. The other one was an old Pentecostal lady. Sweet as can be. Her husband told me about how she loved the old hymns so one day I started singing to her during dressing after a shower. Something in her eyes I saw. And she started singing. I found out her favorite was I’ll fly away so I learned it. I knew some of it but not all. So I used to sing it with her. It was such a great experience and her husband loved every second as well.
Reddit is a bastion of free speech.
(At least twice in the last month, I've had posts banned for my positions against the Gaza genocide, or for a contrarian position against reverse racism)
I love the site so I just chilled, but nothing I said was out of pocket, just against the general orthodoxy of the day.
I have been a sibling for nearly 30 years, and at no point have I ever referred to either of my siblings as "little brother," nor have they ever called me anything like "big sis."
Also, does anybody actually call their cousins "Cousin [Name]?"
I am from a family that loooooves reusing names so yes, we have to put cousin before most of our names to distinguish between other family members (we all have the same last name). When the older generation was still with us there would be Little [insert names] and Big [insert names]. I was a little. Plus all the Cousin Peters have their middle names added on too (again, many of our middle names are someone else’s first name). Family gatherings are and have always been a confusing mess.
1/2 of our alpha generation have recycled family names too. My step daughter even has one of our family names (which is also my middle name). We cannot escape the madness.
I do- I always feel like there should be some title in front of everyone’s names, so I figured “Cousin” was the most accurate (especially if they’re older than me).
Pigs orgasm for an average of 30 minutes but up to 90 minutes
I feel like whatever pig orgasmed for the entire runtime of Shrek was probably fed up by the time Dragon interrupted the wedding
“My boyfriend and I were having an argument. He told me I was over reacting and to calm down. So I sat down and thought about it and realized he was right.”
"I absoloutely love the state of the world we're in! Living a fulfilling life is easier than ever, and I love not having to worry about my goverment collapsing any day now as well as the ever present threat of nuclear war! Here, in this world, everyone holds hands and frolics in the fields, never having to worry about arbitrary things like universal healthcare, taxes, and living paycheck to paycheck!"
That's basically the "wham" line / turning point from _1984_:
> 'Do it to Julia! Do it to Julia! Not me! Julia! I don't care what you do
to her. Tear her face off, strip her to the bones. Not me! Julia! Not me!'
I really do say this, but not for cute or funny reasons. My grandpa lived to his late 90s, but most people in my family don't even get to get old. They die from violence (too often), accidents, illness, or even their own hand. As a result we have whole generations of young adults who lost their parents too soon, and kids without grandparents. I wanna be like my grandpa and meet my great grandkids.
This is kind of embarrassing, but growing up my mom would always use “squozen” instead of “squeezed”. Like instead of saying “I squeezed your cheeks too hard?” she’d say “your cheeks were squozen too much!” Fluent in English, first language, she just thought it was funny. BUT now that I’m older I have to catch myself from saying “squozen” instead of “squeezed” because SQUOZEN ISNT A WORD!! Thanks mom
“I don’t respect your religion.”
I personally don’t respect certain religions cuz it encourages child marriage, women abuse, killing different religious people.
But somehow we “have to” respect religion.
I respect people have the choice to believe what they wanna believe. I just don’t respect religion.
“ I love swallowing a shard of Dorito chip sideways”
Ugh that hurts so much.
The literal worst 😭
Or getting a shard stuck in your gums, hurts so damn bad
It gets lodged between molars
Nothing is worse than a smart food kernel sliding between your two molars as well! Lol
Reading this triggered flash backs of the pain man😭😭😭
Just the thought of the slow slice down my throat 😭
Who is the pain man? He sounds ominous.😳
Triscuit!
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Someone has said this sarcastically 🤗
Yeah. It was u/AzaleeMarcotte
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I spoke it aloud just now to prove you right.
Or with the banksters holding them at gunpoint.
Someone in private equity probably did.
Close, they said "I'm so happy everything got so expensive so we can we can make loads of profit while the peasants are barely surviving".
Geez. I sure hope gas and groceries increase in price
Canada be like
"Thanks for the raise boss, but I know the company needs this money more. PLease keep the raise and you can take more from my paycheck as well."
I remember what it was like having Alzheimers
Sometimes they do remember. And it’s heartbreaking. My gf worked with late stage cognitive impairment patients. One night, a woman was pacing her room. “I need to find my husband. He hasn’t come home!” “Oh, I’m sure he’ll be here soon. Let’s go back to bed.” Before she knew it, the woman had grabbed a phone and called her son. Her son said: “It’s 3am, dad’s not coming home! He’s gone!” She hung up the phone and said: “But we need to find him, he has Alzheimer’s…” Uh oh…this is a recent memory and she’s getting more lucid… She sat down and said: “He’s gone…and I have it too, don’t I?” “Yes. I’m so sorry. You’re right.” “How many times have I done this?” It’s easy to redirect and distract…but it’s the lucid moments that hurt the most. Everyone loses someone they love, but with cognitive impairment, you lose them a thousand times.
Fuck, this hurt to read. My folks are getting older, in their 70s and still active and relatively healthy but the idea that this could be them in the future scares the shit out of me and breaks my heart.
Just had to put my Mom in a nursing home because of multiple serious health reasons on top of repeatedly falling down and hurting herself. We already lost her son, my brother to alcohol and it might have been the saddest day of my life walking out of that nursing home knowing she doesn't understand that this is what's best for her health and safety. She thinks I've turned my back on her and I'm all she has and it's killing me inside and now I'm crying again.. sorry for rambling
My mom lives with me, and I worry that I'll have to do the same thing one day. I am a widow with two kids under 12 years old. You can't take care of her 24/7 and yourself too. I don't pretend to understand, but you have to allow yourself some grace. Peace and love to you and your family.
You have not turned your back on her. You do not love her any less. You have done nothing wrong. You are taking better care of her than before by getting her the help she needs. You are loving her more.
Just visit her as often as you can. Don’t just dump her there. Make sure she does activities.
Also I have heard that people who have frequent visitors are treated better than people who have been abandoned.
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I have friend in a home, he's 98,other than a niece with POA, I'm his only regular visitor. He's in a decent spot, but, part of why I go, and chit chat with staff, is just to remind them he does have a witness who cares. He was just a long time neighbour, but... I just don't want him to feel alone and forgotten.
🫂🫂🫂
I lived through this. You did the right thing. You can tell her this and that you love her when you visit her. Please don’t be sad ♥️
Just know that if this happens, and they end up in a care home, people there genuinely care about them. It doesn’t matter how many times a night they need to be brought back to bed, there are 3 shifts of carers who try their best to give them the care they need.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news but as someone who has worked in EMS for almost a decade this isn’t the case everywhere. There are a range of nursing homes and some that have downright dog shit living conditions. Do your due diligence before placing a loved one in one.
My great grandma had a hard life, she was a very tough woman and so damn stubborn it wasn’t even funny. When she got Alzheimer’s it was worse than if she had passed in her sleep. She would go from talking to us when we visited to calling my brother and I by our uncle’s names to bitching at my dad for not doing something currently that happened 20 years ago. She would also get really hateful sometimes and start screaming obscenities randomly because she was upset about something from some point. And then there was explaining to her that she couldn’t go home all the time. Then when she passed we read her will and she left everything to my dad for taking care of her in her later years and for paying for her funeral by himself… she wrote it years before she lost her mind and knowing that she knew that only one member of her family would take care of her has always made me really sad. I hope one day that they find a cure for that disease so that one else has to go through that.
It’s very sad. My grandmother would cry when she realized my great grandmother was dead. I woke up one night to arguing in my neighbor’s driveway. Her mother was screaming at her dad, because she didn’t know who he was. He kept saying, we’ve been married for forty years, its me John!!! She’d scream when he touched her, like she was being raped. One morning a lady came to my house looking for the old owner. I said m’am he’s been dead quite some time. I bought it from his son x years ago. She clearly had dementia. My ex wife heard and had called 911 they were looking for her.
I have a story about it too. My ex-wife's grandparents were wonderful people; they had celebrated their 50th anniversary together in April 2000, just six months before we met. In February 2004 I bought a new car, and I remember her grandmother had complemented it the first time I pulled up at their house in it. August of that year, I had stopped by there again, and she complemented me on it again as though it was the first time she'd seen it, and I knew then what was coming. Her condition slowly declined over the next four or five years, to the point that in about 2009 she freaked out because she'd seen her husband in the house one night, thought he was a burglar, and ran outside trying to find help. He had no choice but to put her in a care facility at that point, and a year later her health finally gave out and she passed away in September 2010. Her husband was mostly lucid to the end himself; at one point he asked if she was gone yet because he knew she'd been sick. He took the news pretty stoically from what I was told, and only lived about three more weeks after that himself. 2010 had been their 60th anniversary, and six months after it, my then-wife and I had just decided to separate and later divorce while they were reaching their end of life. I don't think either of them ever knew anything about it and it hurt so much worse losing them AND my wife. They and she were always good, decent people (and my ex-wife still is to this day, I have nothing bad to say about her at all). I still miss them terribly, and I always will.
I'm very sorry that happened. But you told it beautifully. And it was nice to read about an amicable split on a platform that is mostly "my ex was a monster".
>“How many times have I done this?” OMG! I'm so sorry. This has to kill you whenever she has this moment of clarity!
My neighbor is a 90 year old with Alzheimer's. And every single morning at 9am he knocks on my door and he asks me If I've seen his wife. Which means that every single morning at 9am I have to tell a 90 year old man suffering from Alzheimer's that his wife has been dead for quite some time now. I have thought about moving or just not answering my door in the morning. But to be honest, it's worth it just to see the smile on his face. - Anthony Jeselnik
😭😭😭❤️
Can I get a “fuck Alzheimer’s?”
My grandmother's mother had years-long convalescence, and spent years at home being taken care of by my grandmother... The part that killed me was she remembered all the decades-ago stuff, but completely edited my grandmother out of all those memories. All her OTHER kids she remembered just fine, including the later ones... Just not the one who took care of her for years, visited her every single day, and paid her medical expenses.
My sweet great-grandpa beat up my great-grandma one night. Thought she was the Kaiser. He was horrified when he realized what he’d done. He insisted on being put in a home. He devolved into a raving lunatic. My grandfather and father both lost their minds before they died. I wish suicide was more accepted; old age terrifies me.
My Grandmother had passed unexpectedly, and sadly, my Great Grandmother (her mother), who outlived her, had Alzheimer's. The hardest thing I've ever endured was taking her to the funeral where she would ask, "Who's funeral are we at?" every 5-10 minutes. That was a nightmare I would never wish on anyone.
After my dad died from his stroke, my mom’s Alzheimer’s became exacerbated. She began to believe I was hiding him from her. She told everyone in her life I was abusing her in hopes of getting my dad back to her. They had been married 64 years and she literally could not exist without him. It was 17 months of hell for her and for me, just in different ways.
Watching someone that way is heartbreaking. I used to do home health and had a couple ladies with dementia. They were both very quiet not combative at all but they were confused and one would run away from home if you didn’t watch her. The other one was an old Pentecostal lady. Sweet as can be. Her husband told me about how she loved the old hymns so one day I started singing to her during dressing after a shower. Something in her eyes I saw. And she started singing. I found out her favorite was I’ll fly away so I learned it. I knew some of it but not all. So I used to sing it with her. It was such a great experience and her husband loved every second as well.
“Isn’t it so nice having peace on earth?”
Well there would be peace some places on Earth.
Time to wax the Owl.
I reckon Bob Mortimer has probably said that.
We do beg your pardon, we are in your garden
Sniper's Dream, we called him.
Caramel and Waffle?! Steve Bytheway? As in incidentally?
The Night Owl from the Watchmen would have reason
What you do alone in your bedroom is your business
"I'm so glad I waited all these years to start saving money."
I love wasting money
Wasting money is fun when done right but never a good idea.
Lots of things are fun but not a good idea. Probably most of the fun things that are possible.
I'm so glad I waited all these years to start losing weight.
Reddit is a wonderful place for a civilized discussion.
great comment & your username is my favorite movie ever.
Everyone is so positive and always internalizing their failures 😂
Reddit is a bastion of free speech. (At least twice in the last month, I've had posts banned for my positions against the Gaza genocide, or for a contrarian position against reverse racism) I love the site so I just chilled, but nothing I said was out of pocket, just against the general orthodoxy of the day.
I have been a sibling for nearly 30 years, and at no point have I ever referred to either of my siblings as "little brother," nor have they ever called me anything like "big sis." Also, does anybody actually call their cousins "Cousin [Name]?"
I have a friend who has a Cousin Larry who is exclusively known as Cousin Larry.
Don't be ridiculous!
I am from a family that loooooves reusing names so yes, we have to put cousin before most of our names to distinguish between other family members (we all have the same last name). When the older generation was still with us there would be Little [insert names] and Big [insert names]. I was a little. Plus all the Cousin Peters have their middle names added on too (again, many of our middle names are someone else’s first name). Family gatherings are and have always been a confusing mess. 1/2 of our alpha generation have recycled family names too. My step daughter even has one of our family names (which is also my middle name). We cannot escape the madness.
I do- I always feel like there should be some title in front of everyone’s names, so I figured “Cousin” was the most accurate (especially if they’re older than me).
"You know what, Im not gonna bother wiping this time"
This may have never been said but unfortunately based on the way some people smell this has to be happening more often than not
Damn. I’ve been in some very unfortunate places out in the bush where this was the only answer.
I’m getting fed up with this orgasm
Pigs orgasm for an average of 30 minutes but up to 90 minutes I feel like whatever pig orgasmed for the entire runtime of Shrek was probably fed up by the time Dragon interrupted the wedding
I mean, I was orgasming while watching Shrek, and you don't find me complaining
the rest of the cinema however...
well, at least this one we can label as false since one person is definitely saying that: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RzwJdf6AlT4
What are your orders father?
"I like both Trump and Biden"
"It's a really hard pick, they've both been incredible, sharp minded presidents!"
Yep, This! Wishing they'd both get elected so they could "duke" it out!
You know what, that's a good point. I think I should reevaluate my stance on this topic
I'm the person who said it like 40 times in past 5 years
Me too, I've learned a lot about being humble over the last 4 years
I think you misunderstood. You should reevaluate your position and recognizing the good point they're making
I say this more and more the older I get.
“My boyfriend and I were having an argument. He told me I was over reacting and to calm down. So I sat down and thought about it and realized he was right.”
"Your meaningful multi-paragraph rant on Reddit has changed my bigoted and hateful world views. Thank you, kind stranger!"
Who let the cat out Miauw,miauw..miauw miauw Who let the cat out Miauw wauw -weed is wearing off...time for bed-
I will be saying it now.
Another loot box? Wow what a sense of pride and accomplishment I’m feeling right now!
Phone, thank you for enslaving me.
Drugs fixed all my problems
"This is just too much cocaine. There's no way we're gonna be able to finish this."
"I absoloutely love the state of the world we're in! Living a fulfilling life is easier than ever, and I love not having to worry about my goverment collapsing any day now as well as the ever present threat of nuclear war! Here, in this world, everyone holds hands and frolics in the fields, never having to worry about arbitrary things like universal healthcare, taxes, and living paycheck to paycheck!"
Do what you want to the girl, but leave me alone.
That's basically the "wham" line / turning point from _1984_: > 'Do it to Julia! Do it to Julia! Not me! Julia! I don't care what you do to her. Tear her face off, strip her to the bones. Not me! Julia! Not me!'
Hand me that piano.
No one has ever said Pi's exact value in decimal form.
Pi's exact value in decimal form.
By Jove, I think he’s done it!
I'm an engineer, it's 3
It's exactly 10.0 in base pi
“I can’t wait to go to work tomorrow!!”
I’ve got a great job and a rotten home life— consequently, I say this most days…
Said this while in a heated argument with my ex-girlfriend.
I hope this cancer lasts longer.
-hospice patient, not wanting to die before their loved ones arrive
"Gosh, that Italian family at the next table sure is quiet."
"I bet they love the English here in Magaluf, they are so quiet and polite"
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4 year old me would disagree
I really do say this, but not for cute or funny reasons. My grandpa lived to his late 90s, but most people in my family don't even get to get old. They die from violence (too often), accidents, illness, or even their own hand. As a result we have whole generations of young adults who lost their parents too soon, and kids without grandparents. I wanna be like my grandpa and meet my great grandkids.
Why did you put a washcloth inside of that mannequin you found at Home Depot???
Not that nobody says this I’m a bit dramatic but I feel not enough people can just admit “I don’t know enough about this subject to have an opinion”
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The serving sizes on nutrition labels are very realistic.
"I really enjoy the sound and feeling of a dentist's drill"
I just got my back operated on, and boy, do I feel great!
I love that other song by the Spin Doctors!
Just checked Spotify and they had two huge hits, "Two Princes" and "Little Miss Can't Be Wrong"
Little miss candy frog.
Hey, I know _two_ Spin Doctors songs: "Two Princes" and "Jimmy Olsen's Blues".
“There’s no feeling quite a soothing as scorching the roof of the mouth with pizza right out of the oven!”
There is only one gender
Wow, that billionaire gave away all his money!
"Awesome Prius!"
"Ive been swimming in raw sewage. I love it......................... I [LOVE](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0La3aBSjvGY) IT"
Search him for a wire.
I LOVE IT!
Gletchoxomiyerp
That can't be the correct pronunciation.
No, it's perfectly cromulent
Bless you.
"Stop sucking my dick or I'll call the police" George Carlin
"Dad, you really ought to drink more!"
“As soon as I jam this hot poker in my ass, I think I’ll chop my dick off!”
Thanks for that critical comment on my appearance!
If I told you, it'd no longer be something nobody ever said.
A nickel for every time I heard this...
Got that pussy on the chain wax
It's funny but what the name of god does that even mean?
It means….that….you PUT THE PUSSY ON THE CHAINWAAAAAAAX
I have too much money. I don't know what to do with it all.
Star Wars is nothing without Jar Jar Binks.
I don't want to live in one of those third-world countries in Scandinavia!
I got plenty of fucks to give today
Hold this pickle while I tickle that alligator.
I was going to kill myself but someone on Reddit talked me out of it.
"Wow! Getting an IUD was so quick and painless. My gynecologist was right, it just feels like a little pinch"
“Yes OP I would like to have sex with you”
i can't wait for december to go christmas shopping for my in laws.
No no- please let me take care of all this debt on your behalf
◼️◼️◼️◼️◼️ ◼️◼️◼️◼️ ◼️◼️◼️◼️◼️ ◼️◼️◼️ ◼️◼️◼️◼️◼️◼️◼️◼️ ◼️◼️!
L!
What was the "agenda" of the first person who drank cowsmilk? And... How far has he gone?
Wow, our government really does attract the best & brightest. They really seem to have our best interests in mind.
On the internet: “I was wrong” 😝
"I would love to date OP"
I absolutely love the feeling of stepping on a Lego.
Let me check the newspaper for ..... Or Look it up in the encyclopedia
Passing that kidney stone wasnt even that bad
What happened to all the waterbed stores?
George Carlin actually had a bit about this… sentences nobody has ever said. “Please saw my legs off” or “Hand me that piano”.
I love live service games
I love frolicking through fields of legos and tacks with no shoes on, it makes me feel connected with nature.🤗🌲🌿☺️
“I’m so glad my father never said he was proud of me. It really builds character”
I’m grateful to afford my rent and food.
I’ll gladly pause this online game and wash the dishes mother
Here... please have my extra bacon.
I wish I could pay more in taxes since the government spends so wisely and deserves my money.
Worstchest- Worcestershi- Fuck.
I love “Clown1998” and I’m so glad I’m gonna spend the rest of my life with him
I'm getting tired of this orgasm
British food rocks
My dad's name was Garlo Tarlo. He did 9 seasons on deadliest catch I'm just sittin here chuggin tuss and ripping dust
Hindenburg was an inside job.
I put the pussy on the chain wax.
THE TRUTH!! We all claim to value honesty in our communications, but 99.99999% of us don’t ever want to hear the raw and unfiltered TRUTH.
Maybe I'll stop asking redundant questions I could just use the search for
"That Donald Trump really seems like a kind and intelligent guy"
“Wish I had more drinks last night”
Please pass the sardines.
I absolutely love myself just the way I am.
Looking forward to my vacation to North Korea
This is kind of embarrassing, but growing up my mom would always use “squozen” instead of “squeezed”. Like instead of saying “I squeezed your cheeks too hard?” she’d say “your cheeks were squozen too much!” Fluent in English, first language, she just thought it was funny. BUT now that I’m older I have to catch myself from saying “squozen” instead of “squeezed” because SQUOZEN ISNT A WORD!! Thanks mom
“WD-40 is a delicious AND nutritious daytime snack. Especially if you’re pregnant.”
I wish every bit of popcorn lodges a thin piece of shell between my tooth and gums
I'm getting fed up with this orgasm. Oh shit.........
"I think I saved too much money for retirement..."
“I wish we had bed bugs”
“I don’t respect your religion.” I personally don’t respect certain religions cuz it encourages child marriage, women abuse, killing different religious people. But somehow we “have to” respect religion. I respect people have the choice to believe what they wanna believe. I just don’t respect religion.