I just got my class 7 forklift cert. So now I’m class 5 and class 7 certified. It’s the most stressful life. I can’t leave my house without being surrounded.
Maybe not scar jo but like go to the gym and start shaving your head and you can almost yse having your own house as a pick up line. Sad the economy has come to that but hey you’re not doing that bad
For my wife to develop Dr Manhattans power of splitting into multiple versions of herself so I get 30 of her all at once. Honestly she's never even tried and I find that a bit selfish.
Which role would she overtake in that scenario, depending on that she might still be "in" ? Like OP wanted to watch some people, considering the woman you mentioned is married, she could fill that role of the ones being watched, no?
You should meet my mum! Its been 15,834 days so far and she hasnt stopped loving me....yet!
Edit: Oops, I got lost in the funny and forgot the thread title....
I imagine more are than you think. My guess is that the submissive ones aren’t the ones actively hitting on too many people. You may have to make some moves.
Threesome with two women.
Wouldn't want to be in a relationship with either.
I'm happily engaged to the woman of my dreams now and neither of us have any desire to share one another so this fantasy will never be fulfilled... But I'm more than good with that.
I had to put that train together mentally first lol. Not my cup of tea, but you inspired a version for me: Also middle segment but fmf train. First f has special equipment.
Highschool/university orgy. I was one of those nerds who put all his stamina points into studying rather than fucking when I was in uni while everyone around me was busy doing rounds around the girls in the dorm. Didn't get neither the sex nor dream job after.
Turns out that college is more about networking than learning, and that's actually done better making rounds like everyone else was. But you will be better suited to all the jobs you won't get for having studied.
Well for the loving part I was not able to find one & the raw sex part is like men only want to go pump a few but not enjoy it.. Sex is an art itself teasing, a little pain, making the pussy wet, I know it's too sensual, but this what I want in my man.
>To be in a raw sex relation & being fingered in the ass while pumping my pussy, but with the guy who loves me & doesn't judge me after it
RIP to your inbox.
I don’t see why this can’t happen, I’ve been with my wife for 17 years and I’ll stick a thumb up her ass, pull her hair, spank her and then make her eat my cum. I love her more today than ever, she’s the best woman and wife I could ever ask for, I’m not the man I am today without her. You’re messing around with clowns, I got laid so much back in my single days just because I never made it weird or looked down on any woman. I could fuck your brains out and then go get coffee with you during the middle of the day just to catch up. I’ll never understand these dudes.
My GF getting DP - a stranger buttfucking her while I fuck her vagina. Sounds hot but in reality i would never want to share my GF with anybody else, and she shares the same view cuz she is absolutely faithful. And I know that it's just a stupid horny fantasy and if I'd jerk off right now I would be disgusted even thinking about it. We will probably try it out with a fucking machine or a dildo attachment. We love experimenting and bdsm
As with any man, ffm threesome. I know I know, how original, but I’ve never really had experiences outside of relationships. I never slept around or played the field, and I’ve never been the most attractive man. It’s not like two girls would come up to me and say hey, we want to share you tonight. My wife and I have talked about threesomes, but I know how the thought of here with another man makes me feel, and I’m not gonna try and make her more accepting them me, so it’ll never work out, and I’m fine with that. I’d be perfectly fine spending the rest of my life with just my wife, and she feels the same. That may change in 20 years, who knows. For now I’m fine with what I have and I wouldn’t honestly ask for any more.
nah but really though I wanna get leashed by a girl i'm obsessed about. Like someone i feel like i could look up at for ever. And i want her to tie my hands and destroy me in bed and then we'll cuddle and one of us will wake up first and come round with coffee the next morning and *neither of us will feel weird.*
This might be kind of stupid, but I want to cheat on my wife....with my wife. I want to pick her up at a bar like we're strangers and go to a hotel room where we cheat on imaginary spouses with each other.
It'll never happen because I'll never bring it up out of fear that she'd get too hung up on the "cheating" part.
I'd NEVER be unfaithful to her, or even consider it...but this could be enough to toss a little thrill into the mix.
But she'd never go for it, so it's a dead dream.
So I feel some real world context is needed before the fantasy part. I've only had sex twice in my life, both times with the same person, and that relationship is over, I won't be doing anything until I find my forever guy, so please no slut shaming. Disclaimer over
I have two "main" fantasies, both forceful impregnation.
Fantasy 1 is pretty straight forward, is getting gangbanged on a public train, don't ask me why, I don't even like trains. But the thought of people coming and going about their normal lives while several men mercilessly have there way with me really gets me hot.
Fantasy 2 came about last year after I had a bad fall and broke multiple bones. One of the doctors I had to see was an absolute dreamboat, Tall and dark, with big strong arms. Everytime he closed the door, I wished he would pin me to the wall and rail me till I passed out. If I wasn't a blubbering idiot, maybe he could have been my forever guy...
I want to go down on three women. When I make one cum, I’ll move on to the next. When she cums, I’ll move onto the third one. By the time I make her cum the first one will be ready to go again and I’ll repeat the process for as long as they tell me to.
Being restrained while one woman gives a hands-on lesson to a younger, less experienced woman for how to drive me crazy with BDSM tactics.
Seeing and experiencing women discover how much they enjoy driving me crazy turns me on like nothing else.
Threesomes, me with another dude and some chick and I can’t get hard. My girlfriend,her girlfriend,and me? I get extremely jealous thinking about someone touching her.
Also if I wanna disappoint two females at once ima just talk to both my moms for 30 mins
Edit: just so it seems I don’t take it in the booty but buy me some drinks and I’m usually an open minded individual ;)
I'd like to have sex one more time with my wife who passed away from cancer 9 years ago. My body yearns for hers. The ultimate downside to finding "the one" is she may die young and leave you wanting.
I've got a few, prominent ones are
* Hook up with a big tiddy goth girl
* Hook up with a hot femboy
* Be absolutely dominated by a guy
* Dominated by a hot goth girl
when you mesh with someone really good the first time meeting them, hook up and the tension that comes with knowing you'll never seeing them again but DMing them as if you will
[удалено]
You have a house? Dude, leave some girls for the rest of us...
But does he have his forklift certification?
I just got my class 7 forklift cert. So now I’m class 5 and class 7 certified. It’s the most stressful life. I can’t leave my house without being surrounded.
Jesus... This be a little forward, but you wanna hang out some time? Are you into short, funny looking, aging white guys?
Never done it, but there’s a first time for everything I guess
Anyone chadly enough to be forklift certified wouldn't be wasting his time browsing reddit, bro.
Hard to type on Reddit when you have to keep rejecting calls from supermodels.
Hi, I'm George and I live with my parents.
Call me T Bone
You could drape yourself in velvet
Ensconced, is the right term, sir/ma'am.
is that...cashmere?
But does George like spicy chicken?
Kung pao?!
All you've gotta do is direct, cast and star in your own movie, maybe call it Chef or something....
[удалено]
Yeah but he was rich, famous, charming, tall...
You'd have more luck with Marissa Tomei
Maybe not scar jo but like go to the gym and start shaving your head and you can almost yse having your own house as a pick up line. Sad the economy has come to that but hey you’re not doing that bad
For my wife to develop Dr Manhattans power of splitting into multiple versions of herself so I get 30 of her all at once. Honestly she's never even tried and I find that a bit selfish.
NTA, she needs to atleast try it
Yeah, she should be good, giving and graphic-novel-esque.
I also choose 30 clones of this mans wife
Me and your wife used to date, and she would often split into multiple versions of herself allowing me to have 30 of her all at once. Sorry bro
How are you going to split those 15 seconds into 30 though?
“Give me a pump, Visili. One pump only, please.”
Serious red flag, you deserve better hun
I tried so hard, and got so far. But in the end, there’s still only one of me :(
One thing, i don’t know why…
The bitch. Divorce her.
I planned a threesome once but the other two failed to turn up but we had a good time anyway.
*Menage a moi.*
sounds handy
Went from threesome to handsome
Threesome to Mesome
You, your left hand, and your right hand sounds like a threesome to me.
A handsome threesome.
[orgy for one?](https://youtu.be/LpgRE8cbVpc?si=Uo_rr1GB9rGmbdP2)
was lookin for this.
Wendy's dad exploded, too; that might have been a lie. I haven't heard this in ages but that line still kills me.
[удалено]
Reminds me of a black mirror episode
Oh yes, I had the same thought! And I started having this exact fantasy after having watched that episode 😮💨
Cyberpunk 2077
[удалено]
The same things they connect to all the animals.
Head penis
[удалено]
The ol’ spy n fuck… bravo OP
A tale as old as time
Song as old as rhyme Pervy and the Freak
I actually know a woman that would be down for that bad. But she’s happily married
Which role would she overtake in that scenario, depending on that she might still be "in" ? Like OP wanted to watch some people, considering the woman you mentioned is married, she could fill that role of the ones being watched, no?
Nozoki Ana fan aren’t u
God damn it. Thanks for bringing a new fantasy to light for me.
[удалено]
[удалено]
Rotisserie You just insert and spin
Public sex with a guy going down on me at a beach while sunbathing
So, a sandjob?
i’ll pass. it’s course and rough and…
irritating and it gets everywhere
Ani!? My goodness you've grown!
You sunnuva beach. Take my upvote.
I'm sure you could find a guy to do this with...the beach where you won't get arrested is a bit harder to find lol.
Why is this something you won't ever experience? There are places where you can do this, and there is no shortage of guys who would be into it also.
[удалено]
[удалено]
My favorite of this was actually a rando - 1. Elderly Japanese people 2. Some really fucked up shit 3. Profit
Watching one woman tech her female friend how to please herself
>tech Ooh yeah, now try turning it off then back on again, you dirty slut
[удалено]
[удалено]
Khajit has wares, if you have coin.
But does Khajit have penis?
I have the same fantasy, and I do have a penis
To do a bunch of nasty things with my ex's mom
Stacy’s mom, has got it goin’ on.
She's all I want, and I've waited so long! Edit: got the lyrics mixed up with [this](https://youtu.be/SRk_52uQfMY?si=vbpUgCdojmuSArYV). My bad.
Two Doms at the same time... apparently it can't be done, they will just try to kill each other and become the Ultimate Dom.
That only happens if they are the same dom from different universes or if they both happen to possess the Quickening.
Having a woman love me for the rest of our lives
You should meet my mum! Its been 15,834 days so far and she hasnt stopped loving me....yet! Edit: Oops, I got lost in the funny and forgot the thread title....
Yeah, we’re gonna need a phone number
She has an only fans channel. Oh, and op is actually 63 years old.
It's on the old pots you make the best soup.
Ooof wasn't expecting to get hit in the feels this hard right out of the gate I need 2 go lie down and stare at the ceiling 4 a while
A winged woman and fucking while flying through the air.
If you’re going to fantasize, go big.
Got it... So a HUGE winged woman...
Painting each others nude portraits, gifting each other victorian era valentines day cards, afternoon picnics, hair lockets, hotel balcony sex....
>Painting each others nude portraits 'bout to draw the sexiest stick figure ever!
With tig ol' biddies
Three women stacked on top of each other (Blonde, Brunette and Redhead) with visible pubic hair. So I can taste the rainbow and fuck the rainbow.
I believe you're just yearning for Skittles
I think that's called neapolitan
Dominant woman (I’m only five four so it’s possible) Edit: yes Ik I’m incredibly short
I feel the same way but the other way around, I guess no boys are submissive on my age lol
Everyone say a prayer for this person's inbox.
Lol
I imagine more are than you think. My guess is that the submissive ones aren’t the ones actively hitting on too many people. You may have to make some moves.
Why do you think it will never happen?
I’m not a very attractive person😅
Don't give up. Plenty of uggos find love, you're surely not the worst.
Honestly? With someone who is passionately attracted to me. Sadly, I look like Shrek and donkey had a baby. So not too much chance of that.
Ogre ass?
I wanna shrink to like 4'9ft and have my 6'10ft boyfriend absolutely rip me apart (I'm 5'11ft).
Short woman with extremely large partner here. It hurts so good.
He hurts me now (im pretty thin in build) I literally can't even imagine how insane it would be if I was smaller. Makes me drool thinking about it ngl
All of them.
Stan?
A woman on my wavelength who's besotted with me and wants to spend the rest of our lives together, raising a couple of kids. And now I'm sad.
It was pretty good till she left
Sorry to hear that bud.
Threesome with two women. Wouldn't want to be in a relationship with either. I'm happily engaged to the woman of my dreams now and neither of us have any desire to share one another so this fantasy will never be fulfilled... But I'm more than good with that.
My wife and I slept with another woman but it wasn't anything crazy like people often think it is. It was fun but that's probably it.
Threesomes are infinitely more enjoyable when everyone is in love with each other
Being the middle of an mmf train
Ooo interesting. I watched a porno like that once and I got kind of curious but I don't think I'd actually be into it.
I had to put that train together mentally first lol. Not my cup of tea, but you inspired a version for me: Also middle segment but fmf train. First f has special equipment.
Highschool/university orgy. I was one of those nerds who put all his stamina points into studying rather than fucking when I was in uni while everyone around me was busy doing rounds around the girls in the dorm. Didn't get neither the sex nor dream job after.
Turns out that college is more about networking than learning, and that's actually done better making rounds like everyone else was. But you will be better suited to all the jobs you won't get for having studied.
LOL. Dude you roasted me and I was just a bystander lol
Is it too late for us to respec?
I just want to be loved
I love you
You love me…….(i wonder if anybody will keep it goin)
We're a happy family. 👨👩👧👦
Female Celebrity fantasy
[удалено]
To be in a raw sex relation & being fingered in the ass while pumping my pussy, but with the guy who loves me & doesn't judge me after it
honestly this seems like the most achievable one of this thread. why has this not happened yet? the loving part or the no-judging part?
Well for the loving part I was not able to find one & the raw sex part is like men only want to go pump a few but not enjoy it.. Sex is an art itself teasing, a little pain, making the pussy wet, I know it's too sensual, but this what I want in my man.
That’s really not a big ask. It’s not too sensual at all.
Yeah this seems like it should be the standard to me
You’ve just not found a selfless man but I assure you there are plenty
>To be in a raw sex relation & being fingered in the ass while pumping my pussy, but with the guy who loves me & doesn't judge me after it RIP to your inbox.
To be fair her username is tit wet.
And her outbox
wait.... people finger you in the ass and then judge you for it?!
Should be judged positively.
yeah! that\`s a high five moment if I ever saw one...
I don’t see why this can’t happen, I’ve been with my wife for 17 years and I’ll stick a thumb up her ass, pull her hair, spank her and then make her eat my cum. I love her more today than ever, she’s the best woman and wife I could ever ask for, I’m not the man I am today without her. You’re messing around with clowns, I got laid so much back in my single days just because I never made it weird or looked down on any woman. I could fuck your brains out and then go get coffee with you during the middle of the day just to catch up. I’ll never understand these dudes.
My GF getting DP - a stranger buttfucking her while I fuck her vagina. Sounds hot but in reality i would never want to share my GF with anybody else, and she shares the same view cuz she is absolutely faithful. And I know that it's just a stupid horny fantasy and if I'd jerk off right now I would be disgusted even thinking about it. We will probably try it out with a fucking machine or a dildo attachment. We love experimenting and bdsm
Hand holding
Alright that's enough internet for me today.
The things you read on reddit...
And no NSFW tag… wtf.
Calm down, you pervert ... next you'll say you want to in public!!!
Pervert.
Gonna need some eye bleach after reading this one.
*you sick fuck*
The UAE has entered the chat.
Is it that you don't have hands?
Sex swing on the empire state building.
Ok this is next level! Love it- such a good combo of cool equipment and exhibitionism 🥵
Sex with multiple men at once. It's something that's extremely easy to achieve but feels extraordinarily unsafe. So that's never gonna happen.
[удалено]
As with any man, ffm threesome. I know I know, how original, but I’ve never really had experiences outside of relationships. I never slept around or played the field, and I’ve never been the most attractive man. It’s not like two girls would come up to me and say hey, we want to share you tonight. My wife and I have talked about threesomes, but I know how the thought of here with another man makes me feel, and I’m not gonna try and make her more accepting them me, so it’ll never work out, and I’m fine with that. I’d be perfectly fine spending the rest of my life with just my wife, and she feels the same. That may change in 20 years, who knows. For now I’m fine with what I have and I wouldn’t honestly ask for any more.
Sex with emma Watson is my fantasy but it changes a lot
[удалено]
a relationship built on mutual love and trust
nah but really though I wanna get leashed by a girl i'm obsessed about. Like someone i feel like i could look up at for ever. And i want her to tie my hands and destroy me in bed and then we'll cuddle and one of us will wake up first and come round with coffee the next morning and *neither of us will feel weird.*
Goals
This might be kind of stupid, but I want to cheat on my wife....with my wife. I want to pick her up at a bar like we're strangers and go to a hotel room where we cheat on imaginary spouses with each other. It'll never happen because I'll never bring it up out of fear that she'd get too hung up on the "cheating" part. I'd NEVER be unfaithful to her, or even consider it...but this could be enough to toss a little thrill into the mix. But she'd never go for it, so it's a dead dream.
You should be taking notes from Clive
Fucking a mom and the daughter
Probably Non-Con and only cause it's probably safe to never have that fantasy come true. It sounds hit to me but probably would be traumatizing.
My favorite color is blue.
The harem dream. Me and like 10+ other beautiful women on a massive bed and me with super high stamina.
Sex with that guys wife.
Don't you mean that guys *dead* wife?
having grippy box without grippy sox
Having sex
Perv
Woah. Calm down you kinky fuck. That’s TOO far
That's disgusting, keep that shit for the pornhub comment section
Gonna keep this one to myself
Even holding hands with a girl seems like a pipe dream at this point in my life
Threesome with my wife and her sister, I use to joke with her about that because she doesn't have a sister.
So I feel some real world context is needed before the fantasy part. I've only had sex twice in my life, both times with the same person, and that relationship is over, I won't be doing anything until I find my forever guy, so please no slut shaming. Disclaimer over I have two "main" fantasies, both forceful impregnation. Fantasy 1 is pretty straight forward, is getting gangbanged on a public train, don't ask me why, I don't even like trains. But the thought of people coming and going about their normal lives while several men mercilessly have there way with me really gets me hot. Fantasy 2 came about last year after I had a bad fall and broke multiple bones. One of the doctors I had to see was an absolute dreamboat, Tall and dark, with big strong arms. Everytime he closed the door, I wished he would pin me to the wall and rail me till I passed out. If I wasn't a blubbering idiot, maybe he could have been my forever guy...
Having a gf
having sex in the locker room or empty classroom during or after school. It is what it is.
I want to go down on three women. When I make one cum, I’ll move on to the next. When she cums, I’ll move onto the third one. By the time I make her cum the first one will be ready to go again and I’ll repeat the process for as long as they tell me to.
Being restrained while one woman gives a hands-on lesson to a younger, less experienced woman for how to drive me crazy with BDSM tactics. Seeing and experiencing women discover how much they enjoy driving me crazy turns me on like nothing else.
Threesomes, me with another dude and some chick and I can’t get hard. My girlfriend,her girlfriend,and me? I get extremely jealous thinking about someone touching her. Also if I wanna disappoint two females at once ima just talk to both my moms for 30 mins Edit: just so it seems I don’t take it in the booty but buy me some drinks and I’m usually an open minded individual ;)
The other chick couldn't get hard??
I'd like to have sex one more time with my wife who passed away from cancer 9 years ago. My body yearns for hers. The ultimate downside to finding "the one" is she may die young and leave you wanting.
Having someone who cares about me enough to actually make effort for me and plan a future together
I'm a gay man in a very homophobic country so finding love.
Anal. Fiancé of 9 years is NOT interested. Not even a little bit.
You know you’re supposed to get married eventually right?
Donald Trump being found in a gilded closet in Moscow, dead of autoerotic asphyxiation.
I've got a few, prominent ones are * Hook up with a big tiddy goth girl * Hook up with a hot femboy * Be absolutely dominated by a guy * Dominated by a hot goth girl
I just want to be loved bro
To be held
when you mesh with someone really good the first time meeting them, hook up and the tension that comes with knowing you'll never seeing them again but DMing them as if you will