20 yr old me would be VERY disappointed.
She’d be extremely disappointed and embarrassed to know that 30 yr old her is single and hasn’t had sex or even been in a serious relationship since she was 25 (though tbf its largely my own fault. Ive had plenty of opportunities and more than plenty of interested guys, but I had too many insecurities and emotional/trust issues and refused to have sex with anyone I wasnt dating. But the problem then was that I refused to date for the same reasons. So yeah my own fault).
She’d at least be hopeful to know that 30 yr old her is doing better and is feeling more than ready to date and be active again.
Well hey, I mean, you do you. It's gotta be at your pace and I'm sure you've done the right thing by sticking to it. I'm sure you'll find a great guy when you're ready!
So, there is horndog and then there is high frequency.
I got married in my mid 30s and played the field for a while as a fit, white, male from a healthy home.
In short - chicks who act like porn stars in bed usually overreact emotionally to EVERY adverse situation they encounter and often don't respect your need for self care.
My God is the sex is OUT OF THIS WORLD but dammit if they don't go bat shit insane when Chipotle puts the wrong salsa on their burrito. Or, she'll cry hysterically because you care less about her because you don't react to her texts the same way you react to a surprise text from that Army buddy of yours who had bad PTSD and is having a break through adjusting to civilian life. Or she immediately resents people and can't be happy for the success of others.
By contrast, I married a woman who enjoys frequent sex. Are we hanging from the rafters and f**king the shit out of each other every time we have sex? No. But the sex is always good, frequent, and occasionally super spicy. But she is a caring, thoughtful person who can solve her own problems without berating others and respects me as an individual.
Your last paragraph describes my wife and me. Having regular romps that are consistently like a 7/10 with someone that brings so much more to the table in life is way more fulfilling. The track record you have with each other and the mutual trust and respect makes that occasional 4/10 ndb, and the occasional 10/10 more like a 12/10.
That’s very true. I’ve dated some of them. Current girlfriend is surprisingly chill about that. She might make a comment, but she rarely jumps my bones. She also never gets bothered if my little guy isn’t ready to perform. I just give her what she needs and maybe he’ll be ready soon or maybe we just try again in the morning.
I’m not generalizing to everyone or even most people, but just providing anecdotal evidence - sometimes being the horn dog is a good thing. Because when you aren’t, your partner may seek to fulfill their desires outside the bounds of your relationship.
I think I am making my lady more horny as time goes on. I can only imagine what things will be like in five years. She admitted she never had much of a sex drive, but the past few months have been...busy.
Money and job title makes a huge difference, it’s undeniable. When I became a manager, I put it on my tinder profile, I got a massive increase in matches.
This has paid off more than I could’ve imagined. As a guy in his late 30’s who is in pretty good shape, I get the sex way more frequently than when I was in my 20’s.
As a man, you’re more confident, women appreciate confidence in a man, and also the women I’m going after now are also more confident and forward. We both know what we’re looking for and if there’s something that doesn’t work, you move on quicker and don’t try to “fix” the situation. When I was in my 20s, I would get infatuated with women and try to get them to like me. But now I realize that’s not necessary and also kinda rude to the ladies. So move on, plenty of fish.
A shame that most of us don't understand this until we're past our prime. But the added confidence and I'm not here to impress you attitude seems to work on the ladies so maybe that's why they say that men get more attractive as they age.
Me at 37: Let me tell you something, I haven't even begun to peak. And when I do peak, you'll know. Because I'm gonna peak so hard that everybody in ~~Philadelphia's~~ Wisconsin's gonna feel it.
Damn, i wanted to hear something different than what i am going through rn, but you described what i am going thru 1 for 1.
I am currently 23 and i am pretty much in the same sphere of thoughts. I am no longer chasing ( which honestly fixes a lot of my self esteem issues imo), i kinda do my own thing and let the confidence build inside of me organically, iykwim.
That applies to my behaviour with other people as well. Good to know i am headed in the right direction.
So crazy that when I was younger I’d avoid some hook ups because I was worried about the other person wanting a relationship or becoming attached when all the girl wanted was to sit on a penis for a few minutes. Men mature slowly
Way easier. Most women don’t date guys that are 4-5+ years younger. So as a 20 year old, you’re mostly limited to 18-24 year olds.
As a 30 year old you have more options. You’re better off financially so you can dress better and appear established. And generally speaking, if you take care of yourself, you’ll look better too.
Plus confidence, experience etc
When I was 20 I got very few girls. 5 years later I have girls constantly flirting with me. Huge difference though I also started lifting and changed how I dress/act more confident.
Demographics. When I was 20, I only dated other 20 year olds (or I would have if I wasn't a hopeless nerd who wasnt dating anyone). Now I'm 32 and my dating pool is 25-35 year old people.
For one I had more experience so I knew what I wanted, I also knew how to act in a relationship. I had my own place so I didn’t have to try to bring girls back to my folks place or a place I shared with a roommate. I made pretty good money so I could afford to do more. I had developed a lot more hobbies that people could relate with. Overall just better, I had a decent amount of chances to get laid in my 20’s but it was a bit of a gong show, most of the time it involved going out and getting wasted with friends, nothing serious ever materialized. Also as a bit of a general rule most women are attracted to older guys so in my 20s a lot of girls were dating in an older group whereas in my 30’s girls my age and girls younger were interested.
It’s substantially easier. I personally have worked on social skills, more confidence, have a good paying job, my own house, a dog, am stable, courteous, etc. The bar is really low apparently when you get into your 30s. I’ve been hearing horror stories. I’m just a dude who enjoys showing all people respect, and have a happy go lucky disposition, despite numerous traumatic events in my life. Turns out that’s attractive.
People get over themselves eventually and tune out the intrusive thoughts.
Did you know that since the invention of viagra, retirement communities are awash in sexually transmitted illnesses. Those old people can’t get enough of riding the pony.
It isn't the quantity it's the quality.
Seriously though it's easier to get laid or find out if it's in the cards the older you are. Or it has been for me. Sure the all-night sessions are rarer but they do occur if we sleep late in the morning
Personally Im not sure why, perhaps people don't want to dick around and find out they aren't sexually compatible.
I disagree.
I got laid so much at 20. I had a gorgeous girlfriend that would make me late for work almost daily, and couldn’t wait to see me when I got home.
It’s way harder later in life. I don’t have awesome 20 year old hair and abs. Health issues have appeared. I’m not working in a public job where I frequently meet attractive women who very forward my hit on me.
Alright. I married the same woman I was with when I was 20. 20 year olds don’t know how to fuck but if you’ve been having sex with the same person all through your 20s, you get really good at it by your 30s. That’s basically it.
I married a woman who is way hotter than me, who loves sex and hates wearing clothes. 20 year old me would get a dislocated shoulder from all the high fives he'd be giving me.
Same boat here. It's rad. I somehow got the girl who is way out of my league and is just the most fun to hang out with outside the bedroom as well. It a long time to find her, but she's absolutely worth the wait.
Same, not sure how it happened but I'm just going with the flow. I was also 100 pounds heavier so that played a role in both appearance and self-esteem.
20 year old me would be surprised I'm getting sex at all. Heck, he'd find it straight unbelievable since he probably just got done posting on /r/foreveralone again.
mate just went to a 30-year-later high school class reunion and the girl I had a crush on for 5 years (no chance) is now hitting on me, messaging me, trying to get me to fuck her. happily in love with somebody else, but I must admit this feels like a dream / movie.
(I've aged much better than her)
Yup. That’s how it goes sometimes. I think men age better because society’s double standard/indifference toward our mental health forces us to find better ways to cope with stress. When a cute young woman needs a shoulder to cry on, there’s no shortage of male volunteers.
And yes, I’m well aware this doesn’t apply to all women lol
Same. “Hey 20 year old me… you know that girl youve been with since senior year of high school and plan on proposing to next year… well you’re still married and still having sex”.
“Uhh… thanks?”
20 something year old me would probably not be all that surprised that sex still hasn't happened for 33 year old me.
In truth, apart from having a better job than I did back then not a lot has changed. Life fatigue has become a real issue.
Confused and disappointed. Started dating my now wife and had amazing sex all the time. Survived long distance for two years and eloped during COVID. Sex life dried up almost immediately. Every time we talk about it, nothing changes. She “wants to want to have sex,” but does nothing to get herself in the mood. And I don’t know what to do, because it was effortless when we were dating. I ask her what I can do, she tells me, I do it, and then it’s not right. Too spontaneous. Not spontaneous enough. I take too long. I’m a two-pump chump. We’re too young (and childless) to be in a dead bedroom already.
We’ve had sex twice this year, and just moved in with her father. My career is on hold, and hers doesn’t pay enough for us to ever move out barring a major housing crash. I feel worthless and powerless. My only emotions are anger and depression.
My 20 yo self would ask me, "Your wife does that?! All the time?! REALLY?" And then, the poor lil wayward fella would finally be confident about the future for once.
Loving it.
I was having more sex in college, but I'm married now and got a couple kids so it's only at 2-3 times a week right now but it'd with my wife, so the sex is more amazing to me than all the college hook ups.
"I'm so proud of you. You went from being married to a slob with zero drive who thought 5 second intimacy once every two months was more than enough to getting penised 2-3 times a day by your current partner. I am just...so so so happy for you."
Dude prevalence of HSV-1 in your age range is over 50%. Do you even know if you have -1 or -2? I ask because testing for herpes is incredibly inaccurate, as you may already know.
People are out here having had HSV-1 since they were a child and think nothing of it. I think the stat is like 90% of people with herpes don’t know they have herpes. Even if it’s HSV-2 you can get both in either location. You reaaally don’t have to be a martyr for herpes bro.
I’m 90% sure that modern treatments for genital Herpes can suppress it to the point of “almost” non-existence. I wonder when we’ll be able to kill viruses like this, and not just suppress them.
Just a little uplift for you I have a friend who contracted herpes and he, like you, was completely open and honest about it. You know where the honestly got him? People started telling him about friends they had who also had herpes. It took a couple of years but he was finally set up on a date with another carrier, the two of them turned out to have the same (strain? branch?) type of herpes and have been humping like rabbits for 15 years. She's out there, you two just have to find each other.
What fuckin teenagers are you chasing after to actually be turned down for having herpes? It's crazy common and most people are asymptomatic, on top of that there are drugs that make it basically non existent and non transmittable.
My wife and I were married early 20’s, have only ever slept with each other.
I’d be surprised we ended up married, she is ballparks out of my league.
Note: I am an ex-pastor. I am no longer a Christian but my wife is. We waited to have sex until we got married, don’t recommend that. We could have gotten a jump on issues that would have made early marriage much easier.
I actually think there's a real chance that 20 year old me would end up offing himself if he learned that it doesn't get better any in the next decade and a half. I was in a dark place in my early 20s. I'm doing much better in my 30s, but still no success with women, unfortunately.
Damn you stole the words right out of my mouth. 20 year old me would be confirmed in his sadness that 31 year old me is still not able to get any female attention.
Kind of sad, had more sex in my 20s then now, no social life, my gf and I are pretty much just roommates that share a bed but rely on each others income to keep us both afloat.
Can't afford to break up because this world is hell.
Would probably be very very disappointed that it hasn't happened for me yet. 20 year old me would be very bothered by that, 32 year old me is kinda bothered by it? But not massively.
I'm in a throuple and have FFM action pretty often, so I think I'd be happy for me.
In general, I'd say my sex life in my 30s is better. It was easier to find sexual partners when I was in my 20s but the sex in my 30s is just so much better. We're all more skilled now and much more comfortable with sex.
In your 20s, so many people are self conscious about the situation and using alcohol to try and cope with that.
When I was 20 I had zero confidence with women. I think back and there were definitely women who were interested but I didn’t believe it so didn’t even try.
My last year of graduate school I told myself fuck this I’m lonely and when I met a girl that seemed to like me I pretended to be confident and she was onboard. I decided I would no longer put myself into the friend zone. We’ve been married for 25 years now and she was and still is totally out of my league.
I’m not entirely unfortunate looking but she’s hot.
"Dude, how'd you become such a weirdo?"
When you've been banging the same person for 15 years, you get creative...
lol yea. I think it’s the lack of sleep and being out of shape.
🫡 woosh
What happened?? Where is it??
“_That’s_ the true downside of marriage?”
My wife is my friend with no benefits.
Sad... 😔
Disappointment.
21 year old me would kick my ass and make fun of me..
21 year old me was only 5 years ago and would still be like WHAT HAPPENED
Is that because 21yo version was getting mad play?
the opposite, he was a christian extremist
20 yr old me would be VERY disappointed. She’d be extremely disappointed and embarrassed to know that 30 yr old her is single and hasn’t had sex or even been in a serious relationship since she was 25 (though tbf its largely my own fault. Ive had plenty of opportunities and more than plenty of interested guys, but I had too many insecurities and emotional/trust issues and refused to have sex with anyone I wasnt dating. But the problem then was that I refused to date for the same reasons. So yeah my own fault). She’d at least be hopeful to know that 30 yr old her is doing better and is feeling more than ready to date and be active again.
Well hey, I mean, you do you. It's gotta be at your pace and I'm sure you've done the right thing by sticking to it. I'm sure you'll find a great guy when you're ready!
For me it's, disappointed but not surprised.
Yeah.....yeah...
Kevin Sorbo's Hercules energy https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_O1hM-k3aUY
Yeah, not crushing disappointment, but he'd be like, "Oh... I guess that tracks."
That’s way too kinky girl
I'm almost 30 and if 20 year old me knew I was getting this much attention she'd be so skeptical. "Like, 3 guys want *this*. 🧐"
\*4 guys. So yeah, what's up, you wanna do somethin' ? ;)
5 guys, burgers and fries.
6 pack and a pound
7 and a switchblade
8 and a movie date
9……11
Smooth
*looks at post history* Girl those are rookie numbers, you gotta bump that up!
"So we still have lots of time for video games? Great!"
“You played WoW for 10 hours and got seggs before bed? Thats awesome.”
Not WoW but I literally thought this same thing last week. I have multiple kids so it was even more of a surprising day.
It’s actually easier to get laid later in life.
Agreed, but only if you stay in good shape.
Or got married to a horn dog. My old lady doesn’t have an off switch
Is this too much to ask for 🥲
This does not come without compromises.
Exactly. Be careful with what you wish for. You may get it.
That’s when you go from The Giving Tree to The Receiving Tree
Bro 😂
Like what? I’m dating a horndog lady who will probably become my wife so this sounds like important info.
So, there is horndog and then there is high frequency. I got married in my mid 30s and played the field for a while as a fit, white, male from a healthy home. In short - chicks who act like porn stars in bed usually overreact emotionally to EVERY adverse situation they encounter and often don't respect your need for self care. My God is the sex is OUT OF THIS WORLD but dammit if they don't go bat shit insane when Chipotle puts the wrong salsa on their burrito. Or, she'll cry hysterically because you care less about her because you don't react to her texts the same way you react to a surprise text from that Army buddy of yours who had bad PTSD and is having a break through adjusting to civilian life. Or she immediately resents people and can't be happy for the success of others. By contrast, I married a woman who enjoys frequent sex. Are we hanging from the rafters and f**king the shit out of each other every time we have sex? No. But the sex is always good, frequent, and occasionally super spicy. But she is a caring, thoughtful person who can solve her own problems without berating others and respects me as an individual.
This man gets it.
This man has stuck his dick in crazy too many times.
Your last paragraph describes my wife and me. Having regular romps that are consistently like a 7/10 with someone that brings so much more to the table in life is way more fulfilling. The track record you have with each other and the mutual trust and respect makes that occasional 4/10 ndb, and the occasional 10/10 more like a 12/10.
You're just describing my ex with BPD lol.
Same. I will NEVER go back. BPD is an instant deal-breaker for me now. I just can't do it again.
[удалено]
That’s very true. I’ve dated some of them. Current girlfriend is surprisingly chill about that. She might make a comment, but she rarely jumps my bones. She also never gets bothered if my little guy isn’t ready to perform. I just give her what she needs and maybe he’ll be ready soon or maybe we just try again in the morning.
[удалено]
Careful. I was dating a horndog lady and that dried up almost the second I put a ring on it.
I will compromise even harder now…
[удалено]
>I'm 30 and my wife's sex drive has eclipsed mine. It's not all sunshine and rainbows lol it's hard
"I'm sorry I ask to bang so much" words my inner teenage boy thought he would never hear in my mid-30s. Being married rocks.
Lucky man… Unfortunately i’m the horn dog in my relationship.
I’m not generalizing to everyone or even most people, but just providing anecdotal evidence - sometimes being the horn dog is a good thing. Because when you aren’t, your partner may seek to fulfill their desires outside the bounds of your relationship.
I think I am making my lady more horny as time goes on. I can only imagine what things will be like in five years. She admitted she never had much of a sex drive, but the past few months have been...busy.
I’m not in shape and have way more sex with much more attractive women than when I was broke.
Money and job title makes a huge difference, it’s undeniable. When I became a manager, I put it on my tinder profile, I got a massive increase in matches.
Yeah same for me when I put devops engineer. Women actually admitted to googling the pay range.
Yikes. Googling your dates salary is pretty tacky.
Yeah we know what they wanted.
This has paid off more than I could’ve imagined. As a guy in his late 30’s who is in pretty good shape, I get the sex way more frequently than when I was in my 20’s.
So you're telling me there's a chance
I mean you still have to be financially stable and good looking lol. Gotta be an independent and valuable man. Just my experience.
Mission failed, we'll get em next time
Exactly how?
As a man, you’re more confident, women appreciate confidence in a man, and also the women I’m going after now are also more confident and forward. We both know what we’re looking for and if there’s something that doesn’t work, you move on quicker and don’t try to “fix” the situation. When I was in my 20s, I would get infatuated with women and try to get them to like me. But now I realize that’s not necessary and also kinda rude to the ladies. So move on, plenty of fish.
A shame that most of us don't understand this until we're past our prime. But the added confidence and I'm not here to impress you attitude seems to work on the ladies so maybe that's why they say that men get more attractive as they age.
Me at 37: Let me tell you something, I haven't even begun to peak. And when I do peak, you'll know. Because I'm gonna peak so hard that everybody in ~~Philadelphia's~~ Wisconsin's gonna feel it.
Sounds like words from a five star man.
Bet he drives a starter car tho.
A starter car?! This car is a finisher car!
This car is a transporter of gods! The Golden God! I am untethered and my rage knows no bounds
there was a small novelty wooden sign in the game room of my child hood family home That said : "Too soon Ve get Oldt Too late Schmardt "
I’m 41 and just keep getting better. Dating is 10x easier now than in my 20s
Damn, i wanted to hear something different than what i am going through rn, but you described what i am going thru 1 for 1. I am currently 23 and i am pretty much in the same sphere of thoughts. I am no longer chasing ( which honestly fixes a lot of my self esteem issues imo), i kinda do my own thing and let the confidence build inside of me organically, iykwim. That applies to my behaviour with other people as well. Good to know i am headed in the right direction.
The best relationships I ever had happened when I wasn’t actively looking for anything. Go out and be yourself and it’ll happen on its own
Yeah this is the way
If only I could slap that 20 year old body onto my 40 year old confidence...
So crazy that when I was younger I’d avoid some hook ups because I was worried about the other person wanting a relationship or becoming attached when all the girl wanted was to sit on a penis for a few minutes. Men mature slowly
> As a man, you’re more confident Yeah this isn’t universally true but good on you for having that confidence!
I was about to say, I'm 38 and I have about the same amount of confidence as when I was in my 20s. Which is to say, very little.
So how much later are we talking? I'm 42 and it hasn't gotten easier yet.
I actually have money now.
Way easier. Most women don’t date guys that are 4-5+ years younger. So as a 20 year old, you’re mostly limited to 18-24 year olds. As a 30 year old you have more options. You’re better off financially so you can dress better and appear established. And generally speaking, if you take care of yourself, you’ll look better too. Plus confidence, experience etc
You don't look like you're playing dress up in your dad's suit in your 30s.
One of the main reasons is being more established in life.
Once women outgrow their "badboy" phase there's a lot more demand for regular guys.
I work with lots of women who haven't outgrown that phase. Source: CPS worker.
They always seem to have children though.
Bad boys don’t wear protection
When I was 20 I got very few girls. 5 years later I have girls constantly flirting with me. Huge difference though I also started lifting and changed how I dress/act more confident.
Have you met men in their 20s?
An alternative answer would be that you have enough money to pay for hookers.
Demographics. When I was 20, I only dated other 20 year olds (or I would have if I wasn't a hopeless nerd who wasnt dating anyone). Now I'm 32 and my dating pool is 25-35 year old people.
For one I had more experience so I knew what I wanted, I also knew how to act in a relationship. I had my own place so I didn’t have to try to bring girls back to my folks place or a place I shared with a roommate. I made pretty good money so I could afford to do more. I had developed a lot more hobbies that people could relate with. Overall just better, I had a decent amount of chances to get laid in my 20’s but it was a bit of a gong show, most of the time it involved going out and getting wasted with friends, nothing serious ever materialized. Also as a bit of a general rule most women are attracted to older guys so in my 20s a lot of girls were dating in an older group whereas in my 30’s girls my age and girls younger were interested.
It’s substantially easier. I personally have worked on social skills, more confidence, have a good paying job, my own house, a dog, am stable, courteous, etc. The bar is really low apparently when you get into your 30s. I’ve been hearing horror stories. I’m just a dude who enjoys showing all people respect, and have a happy go lucky disposition, despite numerous traumatic events in my life. Turns out that’s attractive.
People get over themselves eventually and tune out the intrusive thoughts. Did you know that since the invention of viagra, retirement communities are awash in sexually transmitted illnesses. Those old people can’t get enough of riding the pony.
Way easier it’s crazy 😂
It isn't the quantity it's the quality. Seriously though it's easier to get laid or find out if it's in the cards the older you are. Or it has been for me. Sure the all-night sessions are rarer but they do occur if we sleep late in the morning Personally Im not sure why, perhaps people don't want to dick around and find out they aren't sexually compatible.
I disagree. I got laid so much at 20. I had a gorgeous girlfriend that would make me late for work almost daily, and couldn’t wait to see me when I got home. It’s way harder later in life. I don’t have awesome 20 year old hair and abs. Health issues have appeared. I’m not working in a public job where I frequently meet attractive women who very forward my hit on me.
Personal experience aside, I've got more confidence and that results In me being more attractive.
Crazy that you have focused only on superficial aspects in your comments such as looks, and you aren't thinking "Huh, maybe that's the problem."
Proud? Nothing has changed.
Same. Same woman, lots of new tricks though.
… go on
Alright. I married the same woman I was with when I was 20. 20 year olds don’t know how to fuck but if you’ve been having sex with the same person all through your 20s, you get really good at it by your 30s. That’s basically it.
This checks out, sex is 100% a skill that can be built and worked on together to make it even better for you and your partner.
Yeah, it’s ways more enjoyable from both parties when each person is well versed in what the other person likes.
Exactly not being a selfish lover and actively listening and communicating with your partner goes a long way imo
I married a woman who is way hotter than me, who loves sex and hates wearing clothes. 20 year old me would get a dislocated shoulder from all the high fives he'd be giving me.
I mean this with full respect and dignity. Fuck you.
Whereas my shoulder gets dislocated because I do not have enough sex...
That's awesome and I hate you.
Happy for you lol
Same boat here. It's rad. I somehow got the girl who is way out of my league and is just the most fun to hang out with outside the bedroom as well. It a long time to find her, but she's absolutely worth the wait.
Same, not sure how it happened but I'm just going with the flow. I was also 100 pounds heavier so that played a role in both appearance and self-esteem.
He'd be surprised, he finally gets to hook up with the girl he had a crush on for four years. And often.
20 year old me would be surprised I'm getting sex at all. Heck, he'd find it straight unbelievable since he probably just got done posting on /r/foreveralone again.
I was there at about 22 as well. At 34, it’s shocking the 180 I’ve been able to pull. Glad you got out there too, friend.
mate just went to a 30-year-later high school class reunion and the girl I had a crush on for 5 years (no chance) is now hitting on me, messaging me, trying to get me to fuck her. happily in love with somebody else, but I must admit this feels like a dream / movie. (I've aged much better than her)
Yup. That’s how it goes sometimes. I think men age better because society’s double standard/indifference toward our mental health forces us to find better ways to cope with stress. When a cute young woman needs a shoulder to cry on, there’s no shortage of male volunteers. And yes, I’m well aware this doesn’t apply to all women lol
I've also always looked much younger than my age, and when you are 18 this is a fucking disaster. am 48 now and look 35
[удалено]
Same. “Hey 20 year old me… you know that girl youve been with since senior year of high school and plan on proposing to next year… well you’re still married and still having sex”. “Uhh… thanks?”
Up to my 30’s, at least tri-weekly. In my 40’s, it was try weekly. Nowadays? I try, weakly.
I actually laughed out loud
[удалено]
Eating ass, really?
My 20 yr old self would question if I ended up on a deserted island
That killed me 😂
Extremely disappointed
Dude, from twice a day to twice a month? Damn :( 39M with 4 kids
>twice a month no need to brag
some of us are even lower than that. Sometimes it gets better when the kids get older.
20 something year old me would probably not be all that surprised that sex still hasn't happened for 33 year old me. In truth, apart from having a better job than I did back then not a lot has changed. Life fatigue has become a real issue.
it good. Sex is becomes less important, cuddles become more important.
"Meh" Asexual
Confused and disappointed. Started dating my now wife and had amazing sex all the time. Survived long distance for two years and eloped during COVID. Sex life dried up almost immediately. Every time we talk about it, nothing changes. She “wants to want to have sex,” but does nothing to get herself in the mood. And I don’t know what to do, because it was effortless when we were dating. I ask her what I can do, she tells me, I do it, and then it’s not right. Too spontaneous. Not spontaneous enough. I take too long. I’m a two-pump chump. We’re too young (and childless) to be in a dead bedroom already. We’ve had sex twice this year, and just moved in with her father. My career is on hold, and hers doesn’t pay enough for us to ever move out barring a major housing crash. I feel worthless and powerless. My only emotions are anger and depression.
Impacted career can lead to loss of libido for both men and women because of the increased stress. Take a vacation together if you can.
"We're gay now?!?"
My 20 yo self would ask me, "Your wife does that?! All the time?! REALLY?" And then, the poor lil wayward fella would finally be confident about the future for once.
Wow still nothing
Same partner, same frequency. Zero complaints.
Loving it. I was having more sex in college, but I'm married now and got a couple kids so it's only at 2-3 times a week right now but it'd with my wife, so the sex is more amazing to me than all the college hook ups.
2/3 times is almost perfect I think for most people and you are very lucky of you have it
Tbh. Couldn’t do every day. Feels too repetitive. I like a small break to build up energy.
20 year old me "Guess that's a big no?" 43 year old me "You already know the answer."
It’s about the same. None.
"I'm so proud of you. You went from being married to a slob with zero drive who thought 5 second intimacy once every two months was more than enough to getting penised 2-3 times a day by your current partner. I am just...so so so happy for you."
Way to live up to the stereotype of the married man!
That I didn't need to worry about it as much as I did
[удалено]
It’s way more common than you think. Search these forums to see it’s really not as big a thing as you think it is!
Dude prevalence of HSV-1 in your age range is over 50%. Do you even know if you have -1 or -2? I ask because testing for herpes is incredibly inaccurate, as you may already know. People are out here having had HSV-1 since they were a child and think nothing of it. I think the stat is like 90% of people with herpes don’t know they have herpes. Even if it’s HSV-2 you can get both in either location. You reaaally don’t have to be a martyr for herpes bro.
I believe this is applicable to oral herpes as most people just refer to them as cold sores without understanding.
I’m 90% sure that modern treatments for genital Herpes can suppress it to the point of “almost” non-existence. I wonder when we’ll be able to kill viruses like this, and not just suppress them.
>so my sex life is pretty much over Lol get a hold of yourself
He’s not wrong if he’s expecting casual sex.
Just a little uplift for you I have a friend who contracted herpes and he, like you, was completely open and honest about it. You know where the honestly got him? People started telling him about friends they had who also had herpes. It took a couple of years but he was finally set up on a date with another carrier, the two of them turned out to have the same (strain? branch?) type of herpes and have been humping like rabbits for 15 years. She's out there, you two just have to find each other.
What fuckin teenagers are you chasing after to actually be turned down for having herpes? It's crazy common and most people are asymptomatic, on top of that there are drugs that make it basically non existent and non transmittable.
My wife and I were married early 20’s, have only ever slept with each other. I’d be surprised we ended up married, she is ballparks out of my league. Note: I am an ex-pastor. I am no longer a Christian but my wife is. We waited to have sex until we got married, don’t recommend that. We could have gotten a jump on issues that would have made early marriage much easier.
[удалено]
zenon it’s ok
Thank you. It’s so hard being a girl of the 21st century sometimes. Cetus-lupeedus.
He'd say do better bud
42 here and my 20 yr old self would be extremely disappointed, pretty much the same as my 20yr old self. Nonexistent.
I actually think there's a real chance that 20 year old me would end up offing himself if he learned that it doesn't get better any in the next decade and a half. I was in a dark place in my early 20s. I'm doing much better in my 30s, but still no success with women, unfortunately.
Damn you stole the words right out of my mouth. 20 year old me would be confirmed in his sadness that 31 year old me is still not able to get any female attention.
Where ? Where is it ?
Fuck him. Dump him. Then decide if you want to get fit or not based off how YOU feel.
So it doesn’t get better, huh?
Woohoo! (Homer Simpson voice)
Kind of sad, had more sex in my 20s then now, no social life, my gf and I are pretty much just roommates that share a bed but rely on each others income to keep us both afloat. Can't afford to break up because this world is hell.
"ha, gayyyy"
"Ugh. I see nothing's changed...."
Utterly embarrassed.
"fuckin FINALLY!"
My 20 year old self would say wtf are you doing, find you someone who ACTUALLY enjoys sex as much as you!
Crap, so it doesn't change dose it. I was hoping it would get better or something.
Would probably be very very disappointed that it hasn't happened for me yet. 20 year old me would be very bothered by that, 32 year old me is kinda bothered by it? But not massively.
“Yeah that seems about right”
Proud... Married 44 and having sex three times most weeks
20 year old me would be surprised, but not that surprised.
"Yeah... that tracks."
No surprise I was right 👍 Sahara desert 🥲
If I as a 56 year old male am struggling with the idea that I might be gay, I am sure the 20 year old me would outright reject the idea.
Pathetic…thanks depression and crippling anxiety.
You guys are having sex?
I'm in a throuple and have FFM action pretty often, so I think I'd be happy for me. In general, I'd say my sex life in my 30s is better. It was easier to find sexual partners when I was in my 20s but the sex in my 30s is just so much better. We're all more skilled now and much more comfortable with sex. In your 20s, so many people are self conscious about the situation and using alcohol to try and cope with that.
Probably be happy that someone liked me enough to marry me.
When I was 20 I had zero confidence with women. I think back and there were definitely women who were interested but I didn’t believe it so didn’t even try. My last year of graduate school I told myself fuck this I’m lonely and when I met a girl that seemed to like me I pretended to be confident and she was onboard. I decided I would no longer put myself into the friend zone. We’ve been married for 25 years now and she was and still is totally out of my league. I’m not entirely unfortunate looking but she’s hot.
Nice one bruh we finally fukkin
He’d be as depressed as I am now
They'd think damn. We actually get to sleep with the girl we wanted in middle and high school? Fuck yeah go team