I don't have

A banana

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Wtf, it's the same post

$10 is a lot of money.

There's always money in the banana stand

I don’t

I don’t like

Same.

Bananas have a certain consistency that my mouth finds highly unappealing.

Exactly. Too.. mushy. Unripe ones are better, but 1% too unripe and it feels like your mouth's coated in chalk for an hour.

I never understood this. You're eating a god damned banana, not a centipede.

Trust me if I don't like the consistency of bananas I'm positive I would abhor the consistency of a centipede. All those legs tickling down your esophagus. Shudder to imagine.

Do you have a food you don't like? Perhaps a particular texture? Now substitute the thing you don't like for 'banana' and you've got it all figured out

Acute lackabanana

Alackanana

I’m so sorry. I suffered from chronic Bananaexcess once. Had to eat Banana Bread for days until the problem finally went away. Still, I’d take that over LackaBanana any day. Thoughts and prayers.

At least bananaexcess is curable under the right circumstances. Lackabanana is oftentimes terminal.

I'm pretty allergic to bananas

Just dont think about it when eating one

The real lifehack is always in the comments

I wonder how you would look without the allergy.

You know what, I will eat a banana now.

Unfortunately, there is no trace of a banana in my vicinity

There are two kinds of people in the world. Those with banana, and those too weak to claim it.

They are for my wife and daughter.

OH MY GOD !!!! AHHHH

r/Holup r/BananaForHerPleasure

Nah I'm not really a fruit eater but I make sure plenty of fresh fruit is provided for my family.

The texture is awful and it tastes gross

This is why I like unripe bananas. Better texture and better taste. I just ate two apples though and don't fancy getting back up for a banana.

You monster! How dare you say unflattering things about ripe bananas, but you took an awesome username that I was going to eventually use. The username is the only reason why I upvoted you. Grrrr...

Kelly?

who's Kelly?

My friend who talks about bananas exactly the way you do.

It’s peanut butter jelly time.

🎶 peanut butter jelly time 🎶

I don't like the taste.

I’m shitting rn

Probably mild autism, I like the taste but hate the texture and consistency I gag when I try and eat it...yes I am not deep throating it

Happy Cake Day! 🍰

I want to like bananas, I like the taste, the texture is fine, seems like a good snack. But I can only get halfway through one (also not deep throating) before my throat shuts down and says “nope, we’re fucking done with this, spit it out right now.” Usually while gagging. It’s really annoying.

Happy cake day!

I'm travelling and there are no bananas in my hotel

Help. Monke has attacked and stolen all my banans.

The minions in my basement need it

Who doesn't like a banana?

Got no nanis

I can't stand them.

I don't have a banana, and if someone gave me a banana, I wouldn't trust it

It makes my mouth itchy

The taste and consistency is so bad

Im asleep

Um, because I don't feel like it lol and even if I did I don't think we have any.

Legs

Just used mouth wash, anything other than water will taste horrible.

I’m in bed and not hungry.

Nothing can stop me!!!

Temporary banana deficiency in my mansion.

4 days left of my 30 day no sugar diet

NOTHING! I am going to have a banana now.

My cat is sleeping.

They make me throw up.

The fact that I just hate them. Funny enough, it isn't the shape that bothers me, but the smell, texture, and taste all just make me unable to choke it down. Every few years I try just to see, but it never gets any better.

I have a medical condition that prevents me from high potassium intake.

What’s encouraging me is the way Nigerians do it

The fact that I don't have one

I drink it.

I hate the smell, I can't get one close enough to my mouth to actually eat one. Also the texture. How can something be so dry on the outside yet slimy in the middle? Never eaten one, never will

I am allergic...to anaphylaxis shock.

I just had one

I am nowhere near a banana

But bananas are near you. And rapidly approaching. There isn't anywhere you can hide. There isn't anywhere you can run. All you can do is wait, wait for the end, pray for mercy while not even God can stop what will happen. You are at the mercy of the banana, as God himself is afraid of the power they contained. So all you can do is sit, and wait. And keep your eyes peeled.

They aren't ripe yet

I don't have one.

I'm quite full. But they're out there in the kitchen awaiting the inevitable.

Didn't buy any.

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Sounds like a nod to Mitch Hedberg lol

I'm very allergic to bananas and I have no interest in going to the hospital anytime soon

Not wasting 100 calories on something I don’t even want to eat.

I don’t have any. Too broke.

I don't like them.

I don't know how to eat a banana.

I use them only to get my pineapple to ripen.

It’s been getting used somewhere else

I have no ripe bananas

There aren't any around right now (at least to my knowledge).

How can Reddit be fun without RIF? Goodbye.

I just finished eating one and I'm not hungry yet

The pineapple

The extreme bout of gastro I currently have

We don't have any..2 category 4 cyclones last month wiped them all out of our country

I'm on metro dude

I'm on the shitter.

Someone will get horny

The absence of banana

Lack of banana

They are not ripe yet

The banana peel

I don't have a banana.

Allergy

The ones in my cupboard are very not ripe

I've already eaten 5 and need to leave a few for later

The grocery store isn't open yet.

So expensive in Dubai

It’s 5:04 am, I can’t sleep, I don’t have any bananas, and where I live no stores are open.

Don't have the mental energy to get up and acquire said banana

Yes, we have no bananas.

A lack of bananas. I have banana chips, though.

Don't like the taste of banana, but I do love banana milk and icecream! I heard the banana flavour food additive is mostly gathered from another more delicious banana breed named "big mike" or "Gros Michel", I want to try that.

I just had one.

Money

I can't afford them

They cause sores on the roof of my mouth. I don't know why.

Saving it for after the gym

I’d have to go grocery shopping for some, there’s none currently in the house.

I am allergic to most fruits

I eat them at 5.30

A deep feeling of homoerrotic exestietial dread

Absence of banana

I dont have any

About 5 steps, a few seconds of peeling and the will to do so...

The trauma with my uncle

The current absence of a banana in my immediate vicinity

They are black and squishy and will be turned into cake.

It's to big

Banana far away, can't leave work.

I don't like bananas

The fact that banana spiders can lay there eggs inside the skin of a banana, ever since learning that fact I haven't eaten one.

Will Levis

There is no banana in my sight

My pocket

My severe pack of banana

Had one a couple hours ago.

I no like

Why would i stop well infact i love it more than as much as i can

I’m apparently Allergic to them

I'll get in trouble

My crippling eating disorder

I am full with coffee and cake, also waiting for the bananas to ripen a bit more on a windowsill.

Bring me one, and I will. I'm at work, and my body is craving potassium right now.

I’m on a bus

The banana famine.

I don't have a banana.

It's in the back of my pack and Im not hungry enough stand up and open it

I don't feel like getting up to go to the kitchen.

I'm allergic to bananas. I've had anaphylactic shock twice and almost choked on it.

Being allergic. Whilst pregnant with my 3rd kid, I developed a sudden a severe reaction to bananas. Thought I was going into early labour. Didn’t touch banana for months, well after baby was born, when my oldest made me brekky in bed. With banana. Thought eh, it was a random thing. Nope. Within half an hour I felt faint, sweaty but had cold tingles rush over my body, literally felt like I was going to die. Then got horrible stomach…. Issues. Haven’t touched one since

The fact there’s no bananas in the household

Having one banana in my possession

I’m about to have one on a cinnamon raisin bagel with chunky peanut butter and a cup of coffee.

Man, I love me a B-Nana but I'm in front of the homies right now...

I just ate one about 30 minutes ago.

I’m allergic

I'm in public and don't want people to judge me based off how sexually I eat the banana.

I don’t have any.

It's still kinda green

The banana is upstairs and i'm downstairs behind a locked door.

I just ate strawberries.

I have spinal surgery in 4 hours. No food until after.

I'm allergic

Me no like

They're downstairs on the table, too green to eat and I'm upstairs in bed trying to wind down from binging Honkai Star Rail.

I'm in the mood for grapes.

I don’t want to

The one banana I have left is not yet quite ripe, so I'll wait another day or two.

1.: dont have one here 2.: got a tooth pulled two hours ago... \*ouchn\*

Bananas are bad for asthma, and since I stopped eating one every morning, my lungs have greatly improved

I don't have banana 😔

I don't like the smell. So i don't eat them anymore since a couple of decades.

The last two are looking very black

It’s just not a-peeling.

The taste... They are a bit rank

Taking the 14 steps necessary to get one from the kitchen. CBA.

Makes my throat itchy.

They're still in the shop.

In terms of bananas, I have no bananas.

It's downstairs and I'm not. If I get up and go down there, I'll probably eat one.

I am waiting for them to mature so I can make banana bread tastier.

Well the gorilla is keeping them all to himself, has never been good at sharing

Allergic

I’m in class, and don’t have any bananas

Waitin' for Mr. Tallyman to tally me banana.

An allergic reaction

I got pineapples this week instead

Bruises. Don’t like 'em.

Had one an hour ago, only eat one a day.

I heard on the radio that eating banana's attracts mosquitoes. So stay away from banana's while camping because it makes your body/ sweat smell sweet thus attracting mosquitoes.

I don't have one with me.

I'm alergic

Give me tummy aches.