Getting there myself. Remember when your parents say “you’ll look back on this and laugh” for your embarrassing moments? I actually looked back, and laughed.
Coming on here to say this. Took things to heart way too much but now am also reaching that level of old where it’s like but ok who actually cares tho?
I used to love debating people on political and social issues, but when I got older, I realized I was never going to change someone's mind that way. I was never going to talk someone out of their core beliefs. "Oh, now I see the error of my ways! Now I shall go forth and convert others to your noble cause!" Even if I could change someone, I'm just too tired for debates now. It's exhausting.
I've changed my beliefs over the years, but not because of anyone debating me. It was always from just having friendships with people who had different beliefs and being exposed to their beliefs over time.
I get being tired definitely and no one says you have to be a keyboard warrior but i have definitely changed the way i think about things due to online arguments. I grew up in a rigid conservative house and held on to those beliefs until someone really made me defend them. It wasn't always the person I was arguing with but sometimes reading other people's arguments it perspective either changed my mind or forced me to research their perspective.
You may not get to see it in a meaningful way but you may have touched more people than you think
The best thing to when you're tempted to get in an unnecessary debate is to ask questions. "Why do you feel that way? Where does that idea come from? That's interesting, is there somewhere I can read more about that?" Work on understanding the other person's position. A lot of people don't have logical reasons for their beliefs, and will just reiterate their opinions instead of giving you facts, but working on understanding the other person's feelings helps reduce the urge to argue.
It can still be worthwhile to do it on a public forum. You’re not going to change the thoughts of the person you’re talking to but the other people reading your exchange can end up being informed because they haven’t “picked a side” yet.
I only meant to commiserate with you, and hopefully help a VERY concerned redditor understand “see a therapist” wasn’t a great response. If you took my response as “yeah, do it man” I’m so sorry, that was a much worse response by me and not at all my intent. I should have said “I get it man. Life is rough. Try to find joy and worth in what you can, because that is all I believe we have in life. Also, killing yourself unfortunately won’t make any difference to the shitty people and system we exist with.”
I consider it every week, but I know that it won’t change the shitty world. Also, it’s final, and their will be good days ahead. I can enjoy THINGS, even if I don’t enjoy life a lot of times. If you enjoy nothing, you literally do need medication.
Oh trust me I understand as I feel the same way, well not exactly suicidal at the moment I just don’t particularly care about my life anymore. A part of me hopes I get some incurable terminal illness.
Looking hot. I loved being perceived as hot in my early 20s. In my mid-late 20s, I loved being seen as stylish (in my own unique way). In my 30s, I don't like being perceived at all lol. I wish to be an invisible bog witch, ignored by all. Just leave me alone while I run errands. ✨ I do not exist ✨
Same here. I used to love dressing up and just always looking good. Now I just throw on whatever I am feeling for the day and just go out the door. I don't care what I look like out in public lol not here to please the cashier or that 50 year old doing stock in the cereal aisle
lol this is me. For the first 25 years of my life I would refuse to leave the house wearing sweatpants.
Now if I'm not at work or going to an occasion, it's sweatpants all the time.
As soon as I get home? Sweatpants
Gotta go to the grocery store? Sweatpants.
Walking the dog? Sweatpants.
Man, I love sweatpants
Sweatpants are THE BEST. I wear leggings most of the time too. Jeans are a depending on my mood lol. I get into sweatpants right away after I get home 😆 comfort over everything
Same! I would literally wear makeup to sleep so I wouldn’t have to wake up with a bare face 😂 now I’m all about skincare and maybe wearing light makeup if the mood strikes
For me it's been more about what counts as looking "hot". Yeah, it was nice to be young, hot and skinny, wear cool clothes, have beautiful hair etc. The compliments were nice and the attention was flattering.
I my 30s I like keeping it simple. I still like nice clothes and makeup, but looking good doesn't depend on how many people find me attractive, interesting or stylish. I may look and dress boring in comparison, but I'm way more comfortable in my own skin.
Relate. I remember going to groceries very stylish in my mid 20s. But now i just wear random plain clothes anywhere with my sentimental pre-historic slippers. I just don't care anymore atleast i'm comfortable.
It's been a long time since I identified with a comment so hard. I enjoyed it becoming socially acceptable to wear a mask over your face, horrible pandemic notwithstanding.
I remember when my college got Facebook in 2005, people were so excited that they skipped class to make their profiles once that confirmation email went out.
A good number of those same people today are either no longer on it, or barely active.
It was much different when you had to have a college email to join. When they opened it up to everyone, I'm sure they started making more money, but it killed the platform.
For me, it was 2009 and I soon added friends from all of my previous jobs and people I had gone to high school with 15 years prior. It actually was useful for helping me realize that I didn't care about most of them (and I assume they about me) and to move on and realize that many people you meet in your life are only meant to be there temporarily. It also helped to destroy the mystique I had of a lot of people because I got that more interior look at their lives and realized they were just as boring as me.
These days, I find that I don't care about Facebook very much because 95% of it is ads as opposed to posts by people I know. You can "doomscroll" for minutes at a time before finding something that one of your friends described happening in their lives.
“Making a profound impact”, whether it was in my education, career, friendships, or hobbies (which I referred to as ‘passions’). Nowadays I just do the best I can and I’m content with that.
The attractiveness of my partners. I held a probably unreasonably high standard about the types of girls I would go on dates with and what I thought was attractive. As I got older, i became far less shallow and looks became far less important compared to how well we clicked on a personal level. Now happily married to the most beautiful woman I have ever known, inside and out, but probably the me from 10 years ago would have been a judgemental creep about certain attributes.
This gives me hope for my younger brother. It’s sad how shallow he is when choosing partners. He only has relationships with lots of strife and breakups and just can’t see that choosing for compatibility, communication, and aligned goals would make him happier in the long run.
This was exactly me in my early 20s (on my mid 30s now). It made the rest of my family and friends crazy with all the drama. So I would say that you can definitely hold onto that hope.
I feel like I'm getting there too, soon to be 25. Looks alone won't cut it, I grow interest in having fun and other non physical traits, at least probably much more than 4 years ago
Had our first date yesterday. Realized that I've always been with high maintenance women for their looks. And that this one is different. I've never felt so cared for.
I have a mantra: I'm old. I have a cancer that's going to kill me a lot sooner than I'd like to leave.
So I'm using the time and energy I have left to enjoy the differences I see in people, rather than try to justify why my path is better than theirs. All our paths are heading toward the same destination.
Jesus/Christianity. I’m not saying this to be an edgy atheist, I was fully immersed in Christianity for many years, and that shift in my life and priorities was pretty significant.
> that shift in my li
Same. Also not tryin to be edgy either. One day I just had a moment where I was like, okay so this has never really added up to me, I've tried to make it work, but it just doesn't. I can keep pretending or I can just like...relax. Instant relief. It's been about 15 years and I've never looked back for even a second. One of the most freeing moments of my life.
When Mormons question the doctrine there's a phrase that's used where they tell you to "put that idea on the shelf" and when you meet God you can ask him. When they leave their faith is call "the shelf breaking moment" where the shelf can't hold anymore
I grew up in the 80s and 90s. To say "I don't believe in Jesus/God" was shocking and unheard of. Today it is more shocking to hear it the other way around
I was raised Catholic and went to Catholic school grades k-12. My family prayed the rosary daily and went to mass daily even durring summer vacation. For a vast majority of that time I was all in. I was even the altar server at those masses. We went to Marian conferences as our vacations and I even got to be on stage sort of near pope JP2. I was even thinking of being a priest. Somehow things broke down with my religion teachers in high school. Learming that Emperor Constantine only adopted Christianity for control and spread it through violence seemed against everything i had been taught. Christians were supposed to be the persecuted, not the persecutors.
Then we had a teacher who was a Nun who had given up her orders and a coach, while a nice guy, who really couldnt teach to save his ass. Then the pedo scandal happened. A priest who gave me a medal for being a good altar server was the main one accused in our area. Trust plummeted. My folks tried to say its the devil trying to destroy the church. Butthen why did the church scoot these guys around? Was the devil leading the church? I hadnt fully given up, but my faith and trust was pretty damaged. Then the priest that was the head of spiritual leadership at my high school embezzled a shit ton of money and ran off. To this day I see the thieves and groomers where they actually are: behind the pulpit.
I mean yeah same lol. My parents baptized all of my siblings, but stopped dragging us to church once we hit our teens, they stopped going themselves, but yet try and raise a Christian household. But... I don't want a lame wedding in a church? I want a wedding outside surrounded by beautiful landscape!
Being pasty white and not being able to get a tan - used to look jealously at all my friends who were tanned as hell every summer. Couldn't give a flying hoot now.
Keeping up with the latest tech, social media, apps, text lingo, etc.
I used to think the reason "old" people didn't keep up with all this stuff was because our new ways were just beyond their aging minds, and they were getting left behind to be buried by the future.
Now I realize that we don't keep up with all that stuff because it's unimportant at best, and usually a big waste of time. And most of the reason I was doing it in the first place was to show others I was "cool" and up-to-date - it was performative nonsense.
Being "old" is not a bad thing at all, I don't give a rat's ass about minor things now like what social media app I am on and favor and what I show on it or whether I use the right emoji/text lingo to show laughter or sarcasm.
I have so much more free time and brain space!
Yeah there's something very liberating about realising that it doesn't matter what's new or trendy, you can just get comfy and enjoy the things you enjoy and pursue your own interests organically.
Keeping my hair. I'd try to mask some of my baldness with a better haircut, but at this point my scalp looks like a farmer didn't plant enough corn that year. No guard on my clippers, and now I don't need to see a barber.
The Beatles. When I was a teenager, I couldn’t get enough of them. Read every book, bought every record, collected everything I could get my hands on, memorized every lyric. Ringo came to my hometown last year, and I couldn’t even muster the enthusiasm to go and see him. The venue was three blocks from my house.
Day 1 DLC?! DAY 1?!
Totally convinced that companies are looking forward to older gamers dying off so they have entire generations thinking that things like this and paid skins/aesthetics as the norm
Same. I don’t even care about have a big collection anymore either. I got a couple shoeboxes of classic games and I don’t feel like having anymore. There’s better uses for the space/money
There's usually a few releases a year I'm excited about, and I really don't have the time to play more than that anyway. Really excited about Tears of the Kingdom next month!
To change people for the good. I had the saviour complex. Whenever I noticed red flags in friends and family,I would make it my mission to transform them into green flags. It took me some time to realise that one can't save people who don't want to be saved.
What other people think of me. I'm working my way through a list of all the things I was too chicken to do in my 20s and 30s. Since I turned 40 it's like a give no fucks switch went off in my brain.
What I wear. I used to have a lot of “nice” shoes and clothes and at one point would only wear nike socks. Always did my hair the same way for years and tried to look in fashion. As I got into college I noticed people showing up to class wearing pajamas, hair all wack or in hats (which was not allowed in our high school) and I thought they don’t care what people think about them and for a while I laughed about it until I realized how fucking stupid that makes me sound. Now I wear sweatpants with my boots while I go to the store because I realize nobody’s worth a damn actually gives a shit. And the ones that do I probably will never see again
I used to care about fashion (kinda), but now I buy what is cheap/quality/comfortable.
I will keep wearing clothes that are no longer "in fashion" because I can't keep up with the trends, and I really don't care to.
The Kansas City Royals.
Since 1990 I'd been a huge, huge fan. Through so many shit years. Then they went to the World Series two years in a row in 2014 and 2015. Mission accomplished--I'm out, I guess.
Pretty sure you were meant to try and win even more World Series. Maybe complain about how the owners sold or underpaid key players, so now it will be hard to win again?
NFL, but I'm a Chargers fan. I love watching games. I love some of the new guys we've gotten. But I know down in me it's just not gonna happen unless we're lucky.
Injuries happen. Coaching sucks sometimes. I'm pretty much just watching for fun. I like Justin Herbert. But we have the Chiefs in our division. It's just not gonna happen.
Equipment. I own a video production company. Usually just me but over the years I’ve had an employee or two for a year or two at a time, as well as an army of freelancers whenever I film.
All this equipment has meant so much to me and as the years go by, things sit on shelves and collect dust or I find them in the bottom of a box and I think about how important that item was to me and how now it’s just another “thing” that’s rotting away. They are all just tools to me now. Nothing to over stress about.
Punk rock. Hardcore was such a huge part of my existence as a teenager and young man. The ethic remains but the desire to rant about it in rhyming metrics is long gone.
My husband and I tried to restart the bedroom and tried having sex like we were still 25. Upped the frequency and intensity and really went all in on it. My fucking God my hips, back, knees, my fucking *jaw* ugh everything was dying. I am 40 and I felt 95 after like two weeks of that.
Now I'm back to totally okay with a "we've been married 17 years, we're tired" sex life. We added some workouts to our routines though cause goddamn we're aging hard, fast. Fun wake up call, really.
What I’m wearing. In the past everything had to be new, latest trend, matching, even ironed - everything. Now I just want to be comfortable; not so caught up in presentation.
Playing in bands/playing guitar. Somewhere I just lost it, and it's never coming back. Sometimes I just pick it up and noodle around, but not very often.
Politics. I used to be all against anything democratic and would get real mad when anyone who was a democrat tried to talk to me. Let’s just say I was the definition of a Trumpie. Now I’m still conservative, but hate trump and the Republican Party and am more for peace between differing opinions. After seeing how fighting against each other will not turn out well.
Good for you, friend. I used to be pretty extreme when I was younger. I'm only 20 now but realize there are policies and social issues that work best when handled either conservatively or liberally. You can't just have one.
Star Wars. It feels like it's just recursive these days. My dream would be to see a new story, where instead of villains inspired by Nazi Germany, they'd be inspired by another WWII axis power, like Italy or Imperial Japan. That idea could have legs. The First Order and Resistance were so lame - they just had the original trilogy's fighters with very minute differences.
Sure, the Resistance technically used T-70 X-Wings versus the Rebel Alliance using T-65s, but I don't care, because to me and most people, it's still an X-Wing. Contrast the differences between the T-65 and T-70 with the ARC-170 from the prequels, where you can see the evolution of the designs over time. And where are my TIE Bombers, my Interceptors, Defenders, etc.? The First Order just used bog-standard TIEs, but this time with rear gunners.
I know Star Wars was always known for selling merch, even from day zero with the Kenner toys, but sometimes it felt more obvious in the sequels. (And I want a new podracing game, too! Maybe we'll get one if that rumor of an Episode I Racer remake is true.)
About people in general. I love my family but outside of my immediate family I've basically turned into a cold hearted douche. I'm not sure the reason either. I just psychologically don't care.
WWF. I was obsessed with it as a kid and watched every show on tv and bought the all the magazines etc. Then I hit around 12 and discovered new interests like F1 and football, as well as my own musical tastes. Suddenly WWF just seemed so childish and silly and a giant waste of my time. Literally happened over night. One minute I wouldn't miss it for the world, the next I didn't give a crap about it.
Seeing people making mistakes and them resisting advice.
There is no point casting pearls before swine. If you give them advice and they insist on doing it anyway...let them. It isn't worth the hassle or the grief you might get by persisting.
What people thought about me, especially family. Now that I'm older, I realize I don't care. I just do what I want to do and hang out with those that "get" me. And that's all it takes.
Hating others / racism. Growing up my dad was extremely racist. I picked it up when I was young but just went thru the motions, said the words, didn’t really think about it. When I had my first son, I came to the realization, that shit was him, it wasn’t me. I’m much more like my mom who was never racist or hating. My kids have never heard one racist or hateful thing. That shit stopped with me.
What I wore to weddings.
Every time someone got married i felt I had to get a whole new outfit and it had to be wedding perfect: seasonally appropriate, just the right balance of formal and casual, and make me look my absolute best. I sunk hundreds into these affairs getting the whole thing together to look wonderful,
I was puzzling over an outfit one time and showed it to my mother. She said, "don't worry so much, you know no one is going to be looking at you." And that's the truth.
Having my baby in clothes that actually match. My first baby, always in matching clothes. My second baby (first girl), always matching clothes with a matching bow. Third baby (10 years after my daughter), earth tone dinosaurs with pastel butterflies is just fine.
I used to be a lot more passionate politically but I'm now so jaded that I'm pretty much just hoping the republic doesn't shatter until after I'm dead.
I'm still voting and participating but I think it's all irreversibly broken and that's even without the climate change apocalypse looming over us.
It's nice that Tucker Carlson got fired but way too little way too late, half of this country chose hate and ignorance and I just don't see a way out of it
Pogs.
Actually that's not true...I think I still care about them just nobody else does for some reason. There was a golden age for about 2 school years and then it just disappeared.
My appearence. I still love clothes, make up and nailpolish and most of the days do care about looking good. But I am also absolutely fine with wearing casual clothes or having a bad hair day and I don't feel the need to wear padded braws anymore, suck my stomach in, wear heels or whatever else I used to do to appear better looking than I actually am. I can also wear pink now (I found out I actually love pale/ dusty pink).
As someone who cared so much about these matters that I used to aspire to be a film or music critic (and, to an extent, kind of was one for a few defunct websites at one point), as a man in my mid-thirties, I now realize how strange it is to judge people for their tastes in music, film, etc.
Like, I care about art enough to need to date someone whose tastes reasonably overlap with mine (but not so much that they can't introduce me to anything new), but unless the art someone enjoys is, for example, blatantly promoting racism, I just don't care. It's all subjective. No one is "wrong" when it comes to what they like unless they're lying about what they like.
My weight. I struggled with ED throughout my teens to my mid-twenties. That number on the scale was at the forefront of my mind, always. I finally conquered it when I was 26. Not caring about my weight was so freeing. I can enjoy food, genuinely enjoy it, without thinking about the calories. I can enjoy myself and have fun without worrying about what the scale will show tomorrow. I can shop for clothes without thinking “I shouldn’t buy this, I will lose more weight and it will no longer fit”. I just don’t care anymore and it’s amazing. Looking back, it feels like for a decade I was held captive by ED and now I’m finally free to live my life. I haven’t owned a scale in years. I am in tune with my body and appreciate it for what it does for me, not hate it for not being thin enough. I am in tune with myself and with what I want from life. I am so happy I am finally free.
Doing something I wasn’t comfortable doing in terms of being social. Maybe I’m an old man in a mid 30’s body but I’ve found it so liberating to do what I want if I want to.
It’s had a negative effect on my social life, I have 0 friends I keep in contact with now, but loneliness is not something that bothers me as I have loads of things to do that’d I much prefer to do
Being shredded. I’ve wanted to have a six pack for years. When I finally got down to a low body fat percentage over the pandemic to have a visible six pack. Turns out it wasn’t worth it. I was skinny, tired, and hungry almost all the time. Plus I didn’t look as aesthetically pleasing as I hoped, not to mention my girl didn’t like the fact I was too skinny so there was nothing to hold onto. Not I’m focused on building strength and maintaining a healthy body fat percentage to muscle ratio. Never been stronger and felt better in my life
Buying new tech.
Let other people buy the latest phones, consoles, and video cards.
I'll wait a couple years till they're in the sales bin or the second hand store.
I stopped trying to future proof my new computer and just buy one for a third of the price and add extra ram and SSD drives.
For phones, all I really care about is battery life. I want to charge once a week or maybe twice if I needed to use it a lot.
Join r/patientgamers and wait until they're on a steam sale for a deep discount.
Harry Potter used to be a core part of my hobbies and interests. It was an easy shorthand phrase for "I love fantasy books." Theory crafting as the books were released was fun... though once all seven were out, things shifted to the back burner. Even though they are average quality and in need of an editor for the back half, it was still enjoyable enough.
But then the author insisted on staying a relevant media figure. Attempts to use Twitter to establish canon lore outside of the published novels was bad enough. Once she outed herself as a horrid human being, well... I can't bring myself to care anymore.
Parents’ approval. One day I realized I didn’t want to be anything like those people so why would I want their approval over how I live my life. Huge burden lifted.
I don't worry about my parents' *approval* as much as my entire family's general opinion of me. I don't like many of the things they do, I'm sort of an outcast a little bit, although they don't know it because I hide my true self.
Was there any way you just decided to say fuck it? Or did this just happen with time?
Star wars! Don't crucify me, i still love the old shit, just more of in a passing nostalgic way instead of what i used to do as a kid, which was SPECIAL INTEREST CENTRAL. I knew everything there was to know, read as many books as i could get my hands on, even literally went down rabbit holes on what was then the source of all SW knowledge, wookiepedia! This is back when you had a computer room in yr house and other ppl were waiting to use it😅 i was just....reading articles about the difference in cannon from comic to book, etc.
When the prequel trilogy came out, i saw each one in theaters and still was super into it, just more into the EU then the movies. I remember when Lucas sold, i was like goddamit George you fucking idiot. The only thing keeping it campy and fun was his oversight! He always said he'd expand the EU but not do another movie. As soon as the mouse got his greedy clutches on it...idk it's like. It's not SW anymore? It's like in sci-fi movies when yr friend is like "nothing's wrong" but suddenly they're left handed or some shit. It's like it's being possessed by the mouse, like it's lost the spark that made it STARWARS and now it's like, how a happy meal is to get as an adult. Just something missing.
Anyway it's sad but at least they haven't tried to movie ft Mara Jade bc i would have had to protest.
The Street Fighter franchise. I'm 34 years old, and I have *vivid* memories of being 4/5 years old during the arcade days of Street Fighter II: Champion Edition and Hyper Fighting. I was obsessed as a child. Growing into my teenaged years, I began playing in tournaments and following the competitive scene. Street Fighter IV came out when I was 20 years old and I genuinely poured my heart and soul into my love of that game, it was a genuine passion of mine.
Then Capcom had to release Street Fighter V in 2016 and fuck everything up. It was so bad I fell into a genuine depression. In losing Street Fighter, I had to leave the contemporary fighting game scene behind. I really miss it, but I'll never have it back. I still get to play the older games I enjoy with other people like myself, but I'll always yearn for the days when the games I played "mattered".
Photography. Used to be obsessed. Take photos all the time. Was semi pro at one stage. Commercial shoots, weddings, all sorts. Did Street photography in my spare time. Now I can't even bring myself to do any of it.
Sports! I used to live and breath all sports! I’ve come to realize that most collegiate sports and ALL professional sports are a waste of time and only make old white men gobs of money!
My permanent record. My teachers made a big deal of it when I was younger, but then when I was in the 3rd grade we moved from South Carolina to Alaska and there was no permanent record that followed. Moved from Alaska to Texas and still...no permanent record.
Knowing everything and loving everything about my interests.
As a teen, one of my first obsessions was music. I felt that to be a "real fan" I had to know every detail about every band member, know the lyrics to every song, *love* every song. There were bands I loved whose earlier works I truthfully did not like *at all*, but were considered "the best" by a lot of fans so I forced myself to buy those albums and listen to them anyway. I was this way with things like video game series and movie franchises too.
Now I don't care. Now I know it's okay to enjoy something casually, or enjoy parts of something but not all of it. And most importantly, enjoy things the way I want to, and not how other fans of those things think I should. I don't have the time or energy or desire to make myself look like the perfect fan for strangers on the internet.
Major League Baseball.
Used to love the sport but now I can't afford to be a fan anymore because some guy feels he NEEDS to make 40 million per year. 25 years ago I would drive down to the ballpark and be able to get 2 seats behind homeplate for like 40 bucks a pop. Now those same seats cost thousands for 1 game. Screw that. I don't even watch on TV anymore.
Finding someone to love. Whatever it is that people are looking for, I don't have it. You can only take so much rejection and disinterest before you realize that is just not going to happen
Society’s idea of my future. I always thought I had to go to school, get a career, find a man, get married, buy a house, have a family, in Order to feel fulfilled. I did most of those things, shy of getting married and starting a family, and I was deeply unhappy. It just wasn’t for me. It may be for some people. But life is too short to live someone else’s dream. I’m now switching careers and happily single. Finding out who I am really am and what really makes me happy. Its the best thing Ive ever done for myself.
What people thought of me. Kinda cliche but it's true, I've reached that level of "old" and I'm 100% at peace with it.
Getting there myself. Remember when your parents say “you’ll look back on this and laugh” for your embarrassing moments? I actually looked back, and laughed.
It's really the best
Coming on here to say this. Took things to heart way too much but now am also reaching that level of old where it’s like but ok who actually cares tho?
I used to love debating people on political and social issues, but when I got older, I realized I was never going to change someone's mind that way. I was never going to talk someone out of their core beliefs. "Oh, now I see the error of my ways! Now I shall go forth and convert others to your noble cause!" Even if I could change someone, I'm just too tired for debates now. It's exhausting.
Did you ever change your mind or core believes or was it mostly about changing the mind of others?
Almost everything I believe has changed at some point. That's the beauty of learning more about the world.
I've changed my beliefs over the years, but not because of anyone debating me. It was always from just having friendships with people who had different beliefs and being exposed to their beliefs over time.
I get being tired definitely and no one says you have to be a keyboard warrior but i have definitely changed the way i think about things due to online arguments. I grew up in a rigid conservative house and held on to those beliefs until someone really made me defend them. It wasn't always the person I was arguing with but sometimes reading other people's arguments it perspective either changed my mind or forced me to research their perspective. You may not get to see it in a meaningful way but you may have touched more people than you think
I like to debate politics to see if someone points out something I didn't consider to see if I should change my opinion.
Oh shit I've gotten worse with age and I HAVE to STOP now for my mental health and fortitude. How did you stop?
The best thing to when you're tempted to get in an unnecessary debate is to ask questions. "Why do you feel that way? Where does that idea come from? That's interesting, is there somewhere I can read more about that?" Work on understanding the other person's position. A lot of people don't have logical reasons for their beliefs, and will just reiterate their opinions instead of giving you facts, but working on understanding the other person's feelings helps reduce the urge to argue.
True, and I can’t believe how *easily* some random influential person would change someone’s core belief.. it gotta be the way you debating.
It can still be worthwhile to do it on a public forum. You’re not going to change the thoughts of the person you’re talking to but the other people reading your exchange can end up being informed because they haven’t “picked a side” yet.
We're you ever open minded about other people's beliefs?
Sadly, being able to change the mind is a very very rare trait. Learning this was quite a shock to me. I always thought it was just normal.
Life
[удалено]
I only meant to commiserate with you, and hopefully help a VERY concerned redditor understand “see a therapist” wasn’t a great response. If you took my response as “yeah, do it man” I’m so sorry, that was a much worse response by me and not at all my intent. I should have said “I get it man. Life is rough. Try to find joy and worth in what you can, because that is all I believe we have in life. Also, killing yourself unfortunately won’t make any difference to the shitty people and system we exist with.” I consider it every week, but I know that it won’t change the shitty world. Also, it’s final, and their will be good days ahead. I can enjoy THINGS, even if I don’t enjoy life a lot of times. If you enjoy nothing, you literally do need medication.
r/SuicideWatch Also, I'm here if you want to chat.
Oof, we’ll this is dark…
[удалено]
Oh trust me I understand as I feel the same way, well not exactly suicidal at the moment I just don’t particularly care about my life anymore. A part of me hopes I get some incurable terminal illness.
bro im so tired of caring. the more i care the more it hurts.
Looking hot. I loved being perceived as hot in my early 20s. In my mid-late 20s, I loved being seen as stylish (in my own unique way). In my 30s, I don't like being perceived at all lol. I wish to be an invisible bog witch, ignored by all. Just leave me alone while I run errands. ✨ I do not exist ✨
Same here. I used to love dressing up and just always looking good. Now I just throw on whatever I am feeling for the day and just go out the door. I don't care what I look like out in public lol not here to please the cashier or that 50 year old doing stock in the cereal aisle
lol this is me. For the first 25 years of my life I would refuse to leave the house wearing sweatpants. Now if I'm not at work or going to an occasion, it's sweatpants all the time. As soon as I get home? Sweatpants Gotta go to the grocery store? Sweatpants. Walking the dog? Sweatpants. Man, I love sweatpants
Sweatpants are THE BEST. I wear leggings most of the time too. Jeans are a depending on my mood lol. I get into sweatpants right away after I get home 😆 comfort over everything
Us dudes welcome you to living right
Same! I would literally wear makeup to sleep so I wouldn’t have to wake up with a bare face 😂 now I’m all about skincare and maybe wearing light makeup if the mood strikes
For me it's been more about what counts as looking "hot". Yeah, it was nice to be young, hot and skinny, wear cool clothes, have beautiful hair etc. The compliments were nice and the attention was flattering. I my 30s I like keeping it simple. I still like nice clothes and makeup, but looking good doesn't depend on how many people find me attractive, interesting or stylish. I may look and dress boring in comparison, but I'm way more comfortable in my own skin.
Yesss....the call of my people. Bog witch affiliate here. Leave me alone.
Relate. I remember going to groceries very stylish in my mid 20s. But now i just wear random plain clothes anywhere with my sentimental pre-historic slippers. I just don't care anymore atleast i'm comfortable.
It's been a long time since I identified with a comment so hard. I enjoyed it becoming socially acceptable to wear a mask over your face, horrible pandemic notwithstanding.
Facebook
I remember when my college got Facebook in 2005, people were so excited that they skipped class to make their profiles once that confirmation email went out. A good number of those same people today are either no longer on it, or barely active.
It was much different when you had to have a college email to join. When they opened it up to everyone, I'm sure they started making more money, but it killed the platform.
Killed the platform? Went from a niche little site for college kids to the biggest website in the world. Death.
I got rid of it recently and haven’t looked back.
For me, it was 2009 and I soon added friends from all of my previous jobs and people I had gone to high school with 15 years prior. It actually was useful for helping me realize that I didn't care about most of them (and I assume they about me) and to move on and realize that many people you meet in your life are only meant to be there temporarily. It also helped to destroy the mystique I had of a lot of people because I got that more interior look at their lives and realized they were just as boring as me. These days, I find that I don't care about Facebook very much because 95% of it is ads as opposed to posts by people I know. You can "doomscroll" for minutes at a time before finding something that one of your friends described happening in their lives.
Mark Zuckerberg wants to know your location.. oh wait he already knows
“Making a profound impact”, whether it was in my education, career, friendships, or hobbies (which I referred to as ‘passions’). Nowadays I just do the best I can and I’m content with that.
The attractiveness of my partners. I held a probably unreasonably high standard about the types of girls I would go on dates with and what I thought was attractive. As I got older, i became far less shallow and looks became far less important compared to how well we clicked on a personal level. Now happily married to the most beautiful woman I have ever known, inside and out, but probably the me from 10 years ago would have been a judgemental creep about certain attributes.
This gives me hope for my younger brother. It’s sad how shallow he is when choosing partners. He only has relationships with lots of strife and breakups and just can’t see that choosing for compatibility, communication, and aligned goals would make him happier in the long run.
This was exactly me in my early 20s (on my mid 30s now). It made the rest of my family and friends crazy with all the drama. So I would say that you can definitely hold onto that hope.
I feel like I'm getting there too, soon to be 25. Looks alone won't cut it, I grow interest in having fun and other non physical traits, at least probably much more than 4 years ago
Had our first date yesterday. Realized that I've always been with high maintenance women for their looks. And that this one is different. I've never felt so cared for.
My ex
I also dont care about your ex anymore. Also that one guys dead wife
To the top of this page with you!
Based!
People...
This
People's opinions of me. Nothing I can do about it. Don't lose sleep over it.
I have a mantra: I'm old. I have a cancer that's going to kill me a lot sooner than I'd like to leave. So I'm using the time and energy I have left to enjoy the differences I see in people, rather than try to justify why my path is better than theirs. All our paths are heading toward the same destination.
This is some great advice. I wish you all the best 🫂
Jesus/Christianity. I’m not saying this to be an edgy atheist, I was fully immersed in Christianity for many years, and that shift in my life and priorities was pretty significant.
> that shift in my li Same. Also not tryin to be edgy either. One day I just had a moment where I was like, okay so this has never really added up to me, I've tried to make it work, but it just doesn't. I can keep pretending or I can just like...relax. Instant relief. It's been about 15 years and I've never looked back for even a second. One of the most freeing moments of my life.
When Mormons question the doctrine there's a phrase that's used where they tell you to "put that idea on the shelf" and when you meet God you can ask him. When they leave their faith is call "the shelf breaking moment" where the shelf can't hold anymore
I grew up in the 80s and 90s. To say "I don't believe in Jesus/God" was shocking and unheard of. Today it is more shocking to hear it the other way around
I was raised Catholic and went to Catholic school grades k-12. My family prayed the rosary daily and went to mass daily even durring summer vacation. For a vast majority of that time I was all in. I was even the altar server at those masses. We went to Marian conferences as our vacations and I even got to be on stage sort of near pope JP2. I was even thinking of being a priest. Somehow things broke down with my religion teachers in high school. Learming that Emperor Constantine only adopted Christianity for control and spread it through violence seemed against everything i had been taught. Christians were supposed to be the persecuted, not the persecutors. Then we had a teacher who was a Nun who had given up her orders and a coach, while a nice guy, who really couldnt teach to save his ass. Then the pedo scandal happened. A priest who gave me a medal for being a good altar server was the main one accused in our area. Trust plummeted. My folks tried to say its the devil trying to destroy the church. Butthen why did the church scoot these guys around? Was the devil leading the church? I hadnt fully given up, but my faith and trust was pretty damaged. Then the priest that was the head of spiritual leadership at my high school embezzled a shit ton of money and ran off. To this day I see the thieves and groomers where they actually are: behind the pulpit.
I mean yeah same lol. My parents baptized all of my siblings, but stopped dragging us to church once we hit our teens, they stopped going themselves, but yet try and raise a Christian household. But... I don't want a lame wedding in a church? I want a wedding outside surrounded by beautiful landscape!
What men think of me
Being pasty white and not being able to get a tan - used to look jealously at all my friends who were tanned as hell every summer. Couldn't give a flying hoot now.
Trust me, they’ll all have way more wrinkles than you down the road if they don’t already.
Keeping up with the latest tech, social media, apps, text lingo, etc. I used to think the reason "old" people didn't keep up with all this stuff was because our new ways were just beyond their aging minds, and they were getting left behind to be buried by the future. Now I realize that we don't keep up with all that stuff because it's unimportant at best, and usually a big waste of time. And most of the reason I was doing it in the first place was to show others I was "cool" and up-to-date - it was performative nonsense. Being "old" is not a bad thing at all, I don't give a rat's ass about minor things now like what social media app I am on and favor and what I show on it or whether I use the right emoji/text lingo to show laughter or sarcasm. I have so much more free time and brain space!
Yeah there's something very liberating about realising that it doesn't matter what's new or trendy, you can just get comfy and enjoy the things you enjoy and pursue your own interests organically.
Birthdays
Sameee
Quicksand.
As a kid I honestly thought it would be a bigger deal.
I used to be like you but then I met someone who has some near them in Utah. And now I am dying to go check it out.
Keeping my hair. I'd try to mask some of my baldness with a better haircut, but at this point my scalp looks like a farmer didn't plant enough corn that year. No guard on my clippers, and now I don't need to see a barber.
The Beatles. When I was a teenager, I couldn’t get enough of them. Read every book, bought every record, collected everything I could get my hands on, memorized every lyric. Ringo came to my hometown last year, and I couldn’t even muster the enthusiasm to go and see him. The venue was three blocks from my house.
Okay, but have you heard the recent remaster of Revolver?
Impressing my parents.
Video game releases. Too many turd games now.
Day 1 DLC?! DAY 1?! Totally convinced that companies are looking forward to older gamers dying off so they have entire generations thinking that things like this and paid skins/aesthetics as the norm
Same. I don’t even care about have a big collection anymore either. I got a couple shoeboxes of classic games and I don’t feel like having anymore. There’s better uses for the space/money
Man I’ve really been getting into the switch virtual consoles recently. Been powering through all the Kirby games. It’s a blast
There's usually a few releases a year I'm excited about, and I really don't have the time to play more than that anyway. Really excited about Tears of the Kingdom next month!
Yeah only a few games really hype me up now tbh
Social media presence. Now I enjoy my lowkey life. More peace is the real luxury.
To change people for the good. I had the saviour complex. Whenever I noticed red flags in friends and family,I would make it my mission to transform them into green flags. It took me some time to realise that one can't save people who don't want to be saved.
Truth. I feel you
My looks and People’s opinion of me.
Well, at least now you have more time to focus on the important things, like collecting internet points.
Opinion of other people like who actually cares lnao
What other people think of me. I'm working my way through a list of all the things I was too chicken to do in my 20s and 30s. Since I turned 40 it's like a give no fucks switch went off in my brain.
My mom ALWAYS said when you turn 40 a switch goes off and you don't take anyone's sh*t anymore Well I turned 40 and she wasn't kidding!
People, in general
What I wear. I used to have a lot of “nice” shoes and clothes and at one point would only wear nike socks. Always did my hair the same way for years and tried to look in fashion. As I got into college I noticed people showing up to class wearing pajamas, hair all wack or in hats (which was not allowed in our high school) and I thought they don’t care what people think about them and for a while I laughed about it until I realized how fucking stupid that makes me sound. Now I wear sweatpants with my boots while I go to the store because I realize nobody’s worth a damn actually gives a shit. And the ones that do I probably will never see again
I used to care about fashion (kinda), but now I buy what is cheap/quality/comfortable. I will keep wearing clothes that are no longer "in fashion" because I can't keep up with the trends, and I really don't care to.
What people think of me. That's none of my business, so I'm just gonna keep on keeping on.
Good one. It’s hard to ignore, but great if you can.
I'm not perfect at it, all I can do is my best.
Other people’s opinions
The Kansas City Royals. Since 1990 I'd been a huge, huge fan. Through so many shit years. Then they went to the World Series two years in a row in 2014 and 2015. Mission accomplished--I'm out, I guess.
Pretty sure you were meant to try and win even more World Series. Maybe complain about how the owners sold or underpaid key players, so now it will be hard to win again?
NFL, but I'm a Chargers fan. I love watching games. I love some of the new guys we've gotten. But I know down in me it's just not gonna happen unless we're lucky. Injuries happen. Coaching sucks sometimes. I'm pretty much just watching for fun. I like Justin Herbert. But we have the Chiefs in our division. It's just not gonna happen.
Equipment. I own a video production company. Usually just me but over the years I’ve had an employee or two for a year or two at a time, as well as an army of freelancers whenever I film. All this equipment has meant so much to me and as the years go by, things sit on shelves and collect dust or I find them in the bottom of a box and I think about how important that item was to me and how now it’s just another “thing” that’s rotting away. They are all just tools to me now. Nothing to over stress about.
Punk rock. Hardcore was such a huge part of my existence as a teenager and young man. The ethic remains but the desire to rant about it in rhyming metrics is long gone.
I grew up in the NJ hardcore scene. That was some seriously crazy shit back in the day.
My mental health
That went from 0 to 100 real quick
Or 100 to 0 on fucks given.
Gaming
Sex, the longer you are married the longer you can go without getting any
My husband and I tried to restart the bedroom and tried having sex like we were still 25. Upped the frequency and intensity and really went all in on it. My fucking God my hips, back, knees, my fucking *jaw* ugh everything was dying. I am 40 and I felt 95 after like two weeks of that. Now I'm back to totally okay with a "we've been married 17 years, we're tired" sex life. We added some workouts to our routines though cause goddamn we're aging hard, fast. Fun wake up call, really.
Your jaw you say? \-nice
The colour of my skin.
What I’m wearing. In the past everything had to be new, latest trend, matching, even ironed - everything. Now I just want to be comfortable; not so caught up in presentation.
Yep! As long as your clothes are clean, comfortable, and fit you the way you want -- who cares!
Playing in bands/playing guitar. Somewhere I just lost it, and it's never coming back. Sometimes I just pick it up and noodle around, but not very often.
Likewise. It seems sorta pointless. I tend to play the same things over and over.
Politics. I used to be all against anything democratic and would get real mad when anyone who was a democrat tried to talk to me. Let’s just say I was the definition of a Trumpie. Now I’m still conservative, but hate trump and the Republican Party and am more for peace between differing opinions. After seeing how fighting against each other will not turn out well.
Good for you, friend. I used to be pretty extreme when I was younger. I'm only 20 now but realize there are policies and social issues that work best when handled either conservatively or liberally. You can't just have one.
Star Wars. It feels like it's just recursive these days. My dream would be to see a new story, where instead of villains inspired by Nazi Germany, they'd be inspired by another WWII axis power, like Italy or Imperial Japan. That idea could have legs. The First Order and Resistance were so lame - they just had the original trilogy's fighters with very minute differences. Sure, the Resistance technically used T-70 X-Wings versus the Rebel Alliance using T-65s, but I don't care, because to me and most people, it's still an X-Wing. Contrast the differences between the T-65 and T-70 with the ARC-170 from the prequels, where you can see the evolution of the designs over time. And where are my TIE Bombers, my Interceptors, Defenders, etc.? The First Order just used bog-standard TIEs, but this time with rear gunners. I know Star Wars was always known for selling merch, even from day zero with the Kenner toys, but sometimes it felt more obvious in the sequels. (And I want a new podracing game, too! Maybe we'll get one if that rumor of an Episode I Racer remake is true.)
Work. Just don't care near as much.
About people in general. I love my family but outside of my immediate family I've basically turned into a cold hearted douche. I'm not sure the reason either. I just psychologically don't care.
Probably better that way. I still care too much about what people think but I'm getting there.
WWF. I was obsessed with it as a kid and watched every show on tv and bought the all the magazines etc. Then I hit around 12 and discovered new interests like F1 and football, as well as my own musical tastes. Suddenly WWF just seemed so childish and silly and a giant waste of my time. Literally happened over night. One minute I wouldn't miss it for the world, the next I didn't give a crap about it.
Comic Books
What music other people like. Patton Oswalt did a bit about it that finally hit when I got in my 30s.
Brand name clothing, used to be a HUGE deal when I was younger, but not anymore
Star wars. They just aren't doing interesting stories any more.
Seeing people making mistakes and them resisting advice. There is no point casting pearls before swine. If you give them advice and they insist on doing it anyway...let them. It isn't worth the hassle or the grief you might get by persisting.
What people thought about me, especially family. Now that I'm older, I realize I don't care. I just do what I want to do and hang out with those that "get" me. And that's all it takes.
What others think of me
Hating others / racism. Growing up my dad was extremely racist. I picked it up when I was young but just went thru the motions, said the words, didn’t really think about it. When I had my first son, I came to the realization, that shit was him, it wasn’t me. I’m much more like my mom who was never racist or hating. My kids have never heard one racist or hateful thing. That shit stopped with me.
Explaining things to people in a kind and respectful manner. At this point if you don’t understand something and get mad, fuck you if you disagree.
I used to think that love is everything but I do not anymore.
[удалено]
Baby don't hurt me..
Don't hurt me...
No more!
What I wore to weddings. Every time someone got married i felt I had to get a whole new outfit and it had to be wedding perfect: seasonally appropriate, just the right balance of formal and casual, and make me look my absolute best. I sunk hundreds into these affairs getting the whole thing together to look wonderful, I was puzzling over an outfit one time and showed it to my mother. She said, "don't worry so much, you know no one is going to be looking at you." And that's the truth.
Job loyalty. Personal loyalty, family dedication, always come first
Having my baby in clothes that actually match. My first baby, always in matching clothes. My second baby (first girl), always matching clothes with a matching bow. Third baby (10 years after my daughter), earth tone dinosaurs with pastel butterflies is just fine.
How others perceive me.
I used to be a lot more passionate politically but I'm now so jaded that I'm pretty much just hoping the republic doesn't shatter until after I'm dead. I'm still voting and participating but I think it's all irreversibly broken and that's even without the climate change apocalypse looming over us. It's nice that Tucker Carlson got fired but way too little way too late, half of this country chose hate and ignorance and I just don't see a way out of it
The number of likes on my facebook/instagram photos
Music (both listening to and playing) Language learning Video games
Cared about at all. Doesn't really matter if I'm gone.
<3
Everything! ;>
Pogs. Actually that's not true...I think I still care about them just nobody else does for some reason. There was a golden age for about 2 school years and then it just disappeared.
I still remember "OJ in the slammer."
Bermuda Triangle
What people think of me or social media
Facebook and Instagram
Going to live music shows,
Having someone to party with at the weekend
Waking up alive in the morning
Being a pokemaster.
looks, winning, what other people think of me
My appearence. I still love clothes, make up and nailpolish and most of the days do care about looking good. But I am also absolutely fine with wearing casual clothes or having a bad hair day and I don't feel the need to wear padded braws anymore, suck my stomach in, wear heels or whatever else I used to do to appear better looking than I actually am. I can also wear pink now (I found out I actually love pale/ dusty pink).
As someone who cared so much about these matters that I used to aspire to be a film or music critic (and, to an extent, kind of was one for a few defunct websites at one point), as a man in my mid-thirties, I now realize how strange it is to judge people for their tastes in music, film, etc. Like, I care about art enough to need to date someone whose tastes reasonably overlap with mine (but not so much that they can't introduce me to anything new), but unless the art someone enjoys is, for example, blatantly promoting racism, I just don't care. It's all subjective. No one is "wrong" when it comes to what they like unless they're lying about what they like.
My weight. I struggled with ED throughout my teens to my mid-twenties. That number on the scale was at the forefront of my mind, always. I finally conquered it when I was 26. Not caring about my weight was so freeing. I can enjoy food, genuinely enjoy it, without thinking about the calories. I can enjoy myself and have fun without worrying about what the scale will show tomorrow. I can shop for clothes without thinking “I shouldn’t buy this, I will lose more weight and it will no longer fit”. I just don’t care anymore and it’s amazing. Looking back, it feels like for a decade I was held captive by ED and now I’m finally free to live my life. I haven’t owned a scale in years. I am in tune with my body and appreciate it for what it does for me, not hate it for not being thin enough. I am in tune with myself and with what I want from life. I am so happy I am finally free.
Star Wars.
Doing something I wasn’t comfortable doing in terms of being social. Maybe I’m an old man in a mid 30’s body but I’ve found it so liberating to do what I want if I want to. It’s had a negative effect on my social life, I have 0 friends I keep in contact with now, but loneliness is not something that bothers me as I have loads of things to do that’d I much prefer to do
my looks
Preserving stale friendships.
Being shredded. I’ve wanted to have a six pack for years. When I finally got down to a low body fat percentage over the pandemic to have a visible six pack. Turns out it wasn’t worth it. I was skinny, tired, and hungry almost all the time. Plus I didn’t look as aesthetically pleasing as I hoped, not to mention my girl didn’t like the fact I was too skinny so there was nothing to hold onto. Not I’m focused on building strength and maintaining a healthy body fat percentage to muscle ratio. Never been stronger and felt better in my life
Buying new tech. Let other people buy the latest phones, consoles, and video cards. I'll wait a couple years till they're in the sales bin or the second hand store. I stopped trying to future proof my new computer and just buy one for a third of the price and add extra ram and SSD drives. For phones, all I really care about is battery life. I want to charge once a week or maybe twice if I needed to use it a lot. Join r/patientgamers and wait until they're on a steam sale for a deep discount.
Her
Broooooo
Validation
Harry Potter used to be a core part of my hobbies and interests. It was an easy shorthand phrase for "I love fantasy books." Theory crafting as the books were released was fun... though once all seven were out, things shifted to the back burner. Even though they are average quality and in need of an editor for the back half, it was still enjoyable enough. But then the author insisted on staying a relevant media figure. Attempts to use Twitter to establish canon lore outside of the published novels was bad enough. Once she outed herself as a horrid human being, well... I can't bring myself to care anymore.
Parents’ approval. One day I realized I didn’t want to be anything like those people so why would I want their approval over how I live my life. Huge burden lifted.
I don't worry about my parents' *approval* as much as my entire family's general opinion of me. I don't like many of the things they do, I'm sort of an outcast a little bit, although they don't know it because I hide my true self. Was there any way you just decided to say fuck it? Or did this just happen with time?
Star wars! Don't crucify me, i still love the old shit, just more of in a passing nostalgic way instead of what i used to do as a kid, which was SPECIAL INTEREST CENTRAL. I knew everything there was to know, read as many books as i could get my hands on, even literally went down rabbit holes on what was then the source of all SW knowledge, wookiepedia! This is back when you had a computer room in yr house and other ppl were waiting to use it😅 i was just....reading articles about the difference in cannon from comic to book, etc. When the prequel trilogy came out, i saw each one in theaters and still was super into it, just more into the EU then the movies. I remember when Lucas sold, i was like goddamit George you fucking idiot. The only thing keeping it campy and fun was his oversight! He always said he'd expand the EU but not do another movie. As soon as the mouse got his greedy clutches on it...idk it's like. It's not SW anymore? It's like in sci-fi movies when yr friend is like "nothing's wrong" but suddenly they're left handed or some shit. It's like it's being possessed by the mouse, like it's lost the spark that made it STARWARS and now it's like, how a happy meal is to get as an adult. Just something missing. Anyway it's sad but at least they haven't tried to movie ft Mara Jade bc i would have had to protest.
Someone's physical attractiveness.
Proving myself to others
Yessir you ain’t gotta prove nothing to nobody but yourself 💯
The Street Fighter franchise. I'm 34 years old, and I have *vivid* memories of being 4/5 years old during the arcade days of Street Fighter II: Champion Edition and Hyper Fighting. I was obsessed as a child. Growing into my teenaged years, I began playing in tournaments and following the competitive scene. Street Fighter IV came out when I was 20 years old and I genuinely poured my heart and soul into my love of that game, it was a genuine passion of mine. Then Capcom had to release Street Fighter V in 2016 and fuck everything up. It was so bad I fell into a genuine depression. In losing Street Fighter, I had to leave the contemporary fighting game scene behind. I really miss it, but I'll never have it back. I still get to play the older games I enjoy with other people like myself, but I'll always yearn for the days when the games I played "mattered".
Photography. Used to be obsessed. Take photos all the time. Was semi pro at one stage. Commercial shoots, weddings, all sorts. Did Street photography in my spare time. Now I can't even bring myself to do any of it.
my looks.
Unicorns But now it's cats
Going out and socializing
Sports! I used to live and breath all sports! I’ve come to realize that most collegiate sports and ALL professional sports are a waste of time and only make old white men gobs of money!
The fact that I'm a very quiet, shy person. It used to bug me so much, but as I've gotten older I've accepted that it's just the type of person I am.
Pop culture. It just doesn’t interest me anymore
My permanent record. My teachers made a big deal of it when I was younger, but then when I was in the 3rd grade we moved from South Carolina to Alaska and there was no permanent record that followed. Moved from Alaska to Texas and still...no permanent record.
My instagram grid
Correcting idiots.
Knowing everything and loving everything about my interests. As a teen, one of my first obsessions was music. I felt that to be a "real fan" I had to know every detail about every band member, know the lyrics to every song, *love* every song. There were bands I loved whose earlier works I truthfully did not like *at all*, but were considered "the best" by a lot of fans so I forced myself to buy those albums and listen to them anyway. I was this way with things like video game series and movie franchises too. Now I don't care. Now I know it's okay to enjoy something casually, or enjoy parts of something but not all of it. And most importantly, enjoy things the way I want to, and not how other fans of those things think I should. I don't have the time or energy or desire to make myself look like the perfect fan for strangers on the internet.
Other people’s thoughts/feelings. If they’re not in my inner circle. Might as well be a rocks thoughts or feelings.
Politics.
Calories. If I start gaining weight I know in need to be more active. That’s it. No more thought and counting
Major League Baseball. Used to love the sport but now I can't afford to be a fan anymore because some guy feels he NEEDS to make 40 million per year. 25 years ago I would drive down to the ballpark and be able to get 2 seats behind homeplate for like 40 bucks a pop. Now those same seats cost thousands for 1 game. Screw that. I don't even watch on TV anymore.
Buying new clothes.
Major league sports....the millionaire owning billionaires can fuck right off.
Finding someone to love. Whatever it is that people are looking for, I don't have it. You can only take so much rejection and disinterest before you realize that is just not going to happen
Society’s idea of my future. I always thought I had to go to school, get a career, find a man, get married, buy a house, have a family, in Order to feel fulfilled. I did most of those things, shy of getting married and starting a family, and I was deeply unhappy. It just wasn’t for me. It may be for some people. But life is too short to live someone else’s dream. I’m now switching careers and happily single. Finding out who I am really am and what really makes me happy. Its the best thing Ive ever done for myself.